The Great War of All Things Opposite to Each Other. Not Necessarily Good vs. Evil, But More.

by BarrelRollBrony

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Random, Princess Celestia, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1010

A war started over a taco. Who will win? Who will lose? Who will end up eating that same taco?

A war started over a taco. Who will win? Who will lose? Who will end up eating that same taco?

Published 2014-03-13 03:20:06 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-13 03:20:06 UTC

The Fateful Taco

"I CALL THAT TACO!!!"

Apple Bloom raced into the "All Things Mexican" Shop simply because she wanted the taco on the counter. Sweetie Bell and Scootaloo followed shortly after. (Shortly as in .5 seconds) Sweets, being the total bitch that she is, bucked Apple Bloom in the face and took the taco out of her hands. She then said in a gay voice, " That'll costcha 50 dollas Sweetheart," and put on a creepy face. Scootaloo then took out a waffle, but then put it back because this is a different fanfic.

The fourth wall is screeching in pain.

Apple Bloom was a completely useless filly because she had no money, so she declared war upon it. Many ponies heard this from far away and peeked through the door, including Twilight, The TF2 Soldier in pony form, Tuba Pony, the Jack in the Box guy, and various other people who entered from different dimensions. Almost all of Equestria took sides and started fighting. They magically sprouted all kinds of weaponry, from different dimensions. Luna was sleeping, but she was a bad girl, so she stayed up to watch the fight. This is a filler sentence. Read if you actually care. If you don't, then read anyway.

Team 1: Waffles United
Team 2: Taco League

Sequence 1: Team 2

Pinkie Pie thought her party cannon would worked, but the opposing Waffles Unites had waffle-jammed it. She spent the rest of the battle trying to un-jam the cannon and probably eat the waffles inside. The TF2 Soldier put on a sweet hat and started fighting, but was interrupted by a trade request, so he died. Twilight was mega-zapping people from above becuz she is an op alicorn princess. Rainbow Dash had a head- to head fight with Chrysalis who was jabbing at her atop her mighty steed. (Which was Fluffle Puff) After beating Chrysalis and hugging Fluffle Puff, Rainbow Dash started mocking Twilight by flying around like an op pegasus. Fluffle Puff got scared, so she decided to gasp in horror at the battle. Everypony stopped fighting then feel asleep, then turned into elephants, then died.

Moral of sequence: Don't bring a Fluffle Puff to a magic, gun, sword, dragon, and hoof fight.

Sequnce 2: Team 1

Fluttershy was healing the wounded ponies and non-ponies and cheered on her team, which was Waffles United. Her cheering stopped when Spike got bored and started watching porn. The teams had been scambled, so the Soldier was now on the Waffles United team. He came up to Spike and yelled, "PUT YOUR TINY SHAFT BACK IN YOUR INAPPARENT PANTS AND GET TO THE FRONT LINES YOU MISERABLE SOP!" This made Spike cry because of his baby-mind and Fluttershy came to comfort him.
The Soldier then shot himself in the head because he made Fluttershy sad too. Pinkie used her Taco-charged cannon to destroy anyone who dared to stand in her way. Fluttershy got mad so she used the power of YAY to fend off Pinkies attacks. The waffle base was safe.

Sequence 3: Team 28437297498234897234

Rarity used her Power Pony Green Lantern Powers to obliterate peeps. Dash asked Rarity how she got her powers back, but Rarity changed the subject and started talking about clothes. Her powers made her conversation sound interesting so everypony wanted to listen to what she was saying. Trollestia destroyed Rarity's power dress so she lost her un-dull-conversation powers and everypony killed Rarity for being dull. Trollestia then fired a Duosion Taco-Waffle Compact Destruction Bombardment Cannon at the planet, TacoWaffle-fying its core, making the entire world melt (with tacos) from the inside out. Trollestia then returned to her own universe where the battle was still occuring.

End of Sequences

Scootaloo took cover as Taco missles rained from the sky. She had wasted all her waffle grenades by throwing them backward. Little did she know that all the grenades went into a giant crevice right behind her. Luna descended from the sky and gave Scootaloo a bubble wrap wand to use in battle. Scoots then used BubbleWrapian Witchcraft to force ponies to descend into incep(inception)tion land. Apple Bloom was dead, but no one cared. Sweetie Bell approached Scootaloo with her dual taco swords and challenged Scootaloo to a fight.

cue boss music

FINAL BOSS: Taco Bell

Scootaloo used her BubbleBeam to attack TacoBell, but she easily deflected it. They descended into the perfect Boss Fight arena: Final Destination. Scoots tried to escape and pressed the "Flee" button, but Sweetie Belle said in a Nickelodeon Announcer voice, "Its no use! Your trapped!" Scoots called on the power of the Waffle and lunged at TB. TB slashed at Scoots, but she jumped back just in time to do a super awesome backflip BubbleBeam. TB got hit backward but ninja teleported in front of Scoots and said, "I SEEZ YOU!" with a pootis heavy face. Scoots tried to descend into incep(inception)tion land, but her wand ran out of bubble wrap. TB saw this as her chance to slice, but when she attacked, Scootaloo used the Power of the Waffle that she charged from earlier to teleport to Zecora's cottage once again. Zecora's body was rotting on the floor, but no one cared. Scoots chugged all the potions and nocliped back to Final Destination, only to find TB charging up a Doritos Locos Tacos Cool-os Ranch-os with-os some-os Spicy-os Dressing-os Super-os Slice-os directed at her. The attack didn't miss and Scoots crashed into the 564th wall. There, Scoots got angry for no apparent reason, so she called upon the power of every op alicorn princess ever and launched a Duosion Taco-Waffle Compact Destruction Bombardment Cannon directly at TB, TacoWaffle-fied her body. She was still alive because of the Tacos, but it drained all her energy. She admitted defeat and Scootaloo teleported back home and Sweets, no longer Taco Bell ate the Fateful Taco which ended the fighting. Ponyville was safe, for now. The taco was made of plastic anyway.

Author's Note

TAKE YOUR SIDE!

Put your team in the comments!