Twilight’s eyes were fixated on the figure in front of her. A pony in a black latex suit had a cupcake thrown at them, and they fell to the ground.
Twilight couldn’t make out the details of the pony’s identity. The cupcake had splattered all over the victim’s face, and they now lay on the ground incapacitated.
A white unicorn with a curly blonde mane came galloping in from behind Twilight, screaming in despair.
“NOOOO!!!”
Her desperate cries of agony echoed throughout the train station, as the other passengers waiting to board the train were pushed aside by the frantic blue eyed unicorn.
The mysterious unicorn placed her hooves on the now unconscious victim of the cupcake assault, and began to cry. The sound of a train slowly leaving the station and riding along the tracks began to assault Twilight’s ears. The noise grew louder and louder, until...
GASP!
Twilight woke up from her dream, and was greeted by the sound of stallions pulling wagons filled with rocks and other such minerals. The purple pony was high above the ground in a wooden cage that was hoisted from the ceiling with rope. She looked down below and observed the underground catacombs that she now called home.
It had been a full year now since anypony had seen the surface of Equestria. Well, except for the Pony of Honor. Every few weeks, another pony was taken from their cage and declared an official Pony of Honor. They were to aid the scientist ponies by risking their well being and observing the land above.
The scientist ponies had no other alternatives. The muffins, cupcakes, pies, and cakes had mutated, and now ruled all of Equestria. Twilight remembered it as if it were yesterday, although the exact details had been forgotten by now.
One day, ponies found themselves unable to stop ordering food from Sugarcube Corner. It was as if something inside of them had snapped, and they couldn’t help themselves. One pony even said that a cake was “calling to them.”
Eventually, the baked goods began to take on a sentient life of their own. They began to force themselves onto ponies, demanding that they be consumed. The ponies could not resist their will, and soon almost all of Equestria had fallen victim to the baked goods’ insidious plot.
Twilight had tried to find Princess Celestia, but even she, too, had been defeated. Celestia lay there in her throne room; her stomach bulging, she urged Twilight to find shelter from the demonic cupcakes and muffins alike.
A year had passed since then, and the few ponies that hadn’t been infected had evacuated to an underground shelter far beneath Equestria’s surface. As far as Twilight knew, the scientists still had no means of which to cure the infected ponies.
Twilight sat back on her wooden bed and looked into the cage beside her. She called out to the occupant.
“Psst, Fluttershy. Fluttershy!”
The yellow pegasus pony rolled in her bed to turn and face Twilight.
“Yes, Twilight?”
“Who do you think the next Pony of Honor will be?”
“I think they’re going to call out the name in a few minutes.”
“Really?!”
Just then, Mayor Mare appeared. She was standing atop a wooden balcony that was at the edge of a cliff that overlooked the wooden cages. She pointed her hoof at Twilight Sparkle.
“Twilight Sparkle, you are the next Pony of Honor. Please suit up and exit to the surface at once.”
With that, she pulled a rope that released the lock on Twilight’s cage and left the balcony.
Twilight turned towards Fluttershy, with a feeling of intense anxiety churning in her stomach.
Fluttershy motioned for Twilight to leave, “Go on, I’m sure it’s not so bad. It’s true that no Pony of Honor has ever returned, but that doesn’t mean you won’t.”
Twilight glared at her.
“Thanks. I feel a lot better now.”
Twilight grabbed a rope that had descended into her cage and hoisted herself up and onto the balcony Mayor Mare had been standing on. She galloped into a hallway and took the first right she came to, straight into the designated changing room.
Surprisingly, this room was almost completely made of crystal, rather than the usual dirt and rock that the rest of the underground catacombs were composed of. She found a small wooden chest which she promptly opened. Inside, there was a black latex suit and an eye patch. She put both of them on and reported to the scientist ponies in the adjacent room.
Before her were a group of ponies she had seen before.
‘These are the scientists that are supposed to be saving all of Equestria?’ She thought to herself.
There were five of them in total. Their members consisted of Trixie, Granny Smith, Spitfire, Cheerilee, and Applejack.
They were all seated behind a large table, and only their heads were visible. They stared at Twilight in complete silence.
Cheerilee broke the silence and said, “Why don’t you sit down, Twilight?”
Twilight looked behind herself and saw a small crystalline chair. She sat down in it, and immediately crystals formed around her hooves, preventing her from leaving. The chair rose up off the ground and Twilight’s head almost touched the ceiling.
Trixie began to speak, “We are sending you to the surface of Equestria, where you will retrieve samples of pastries and other baked goods. We will study them and attempt to find a cure for the stomach virus that is plaguing all of ponykind. After that...”
She trailed off and shifted her glance towards Applejack.
Applejack rolled her eyes and sighed, “And after that, we have a new experiment we’d like ta test. We wanted to use you as the test experiment. Is that alright, sugar cube?”
Twilight looked concerned.
“What kind of experiment?”
The scientists looked at each other nervously.
Spitfire spoke up, “We recently found a time travel spell created by Starswirl the Bearded. It allows the user to take multiple leaps back in time, but at a cost...”
Twilight looked at each of the scientists, waiting for a follow up response.
“Well? What’s the cost?”
Spitfire continued, a solemn expression on her face, “The user’s sanity.”
A small manhole began to slowly slide open as a purple hoof made its way out from underground. Twilight had made it to the surface, after having agreed to take part in the scientists’ time travel experiment. What more did she have to lose? She would risk anything to save Equestria from this horrible fate.
The town she was in was all too familiar to her. It was what remained of Ponyville. Everything was covered in frosting and cupcake wrappers. Sprinkles now adorned all of the trees and buildings, and gigantic chocolate chips had bulldozed through the once bustling village.
There were hundreds of ponies sprawled out across the ground, writhing in agony and clutching their stomachs. Twilight cautiously approached one, and tried to communicate.
“Excuse me, can you speak? Can you tell me what you remember?”
The pony just groaned in response and placed their hoof on their bloated stomach. Everypony was like this. They couldn’t bring themselves to move an inch, let alone speak. They had been completely incapacitated. Twilight decided to block out the horrific sight of the suffering ponies and continued her observation mission.
She soon came across a partially intact muffin, and carefully picked it up with a pair of tweezers. She gently placed it into a glass jar and sealed it shut, making sure not to inhale whatever virus the food may have contained. Her modified diver helmet allowed her to breathe clean air in this toxic environment. The smell of the sweets eluded her.
After a few more minutes, she had made her way to her old home, the Golden Oak Library. Near the entrance she found a tiny decaying chocolate chip cookie, which she placed into another glass jar she had brought along. As soon as she finished sealing the jar, an ear shattering roar bellowed out from behind her.
Twilight spun around and fell onto her back, looking up at the horrible sight a few feet away from her. It was a sentient cupcake, relatively the same size as Celestia, if not slightly larger. It roared again, but it seemed to not have noticed Twilight. It ran away and soon its image was engulfed by a veil of mist.
This Pony of Honor had decided enough was enough, and galloped back to the manhole to present her findings to the scientist ponies. Before she dropped down, she took one last look at Ponyville, and the plight of the bloated ponies. She saw one pony look towards her, a desperate look in their eyes. Twilight couldn’t bear to see any more, and traveled back underground, sealing off the manhole above her.
Upon reaching the catacombs, Twilight was immediately seized by ponies wearing latex suits and helmets and was taken to a large underground cave with a pond in its center. They threw her into the pond and then dragged her back out before she had time to catch her breath.
She returned to the changing room and dried herself off, having now been cleansed of any potentially hazardous germs. The purple pony opened the door leading to the scientists’ chambers and took her seat in the crystalline chair once again. It raised her up to the ceiling and the crystals formed around her hooves.
“I’m ready to travel back in time,” Twilight said, bracing herself.
Granny Smith showed her a picture of several red silhouettes. There was a silhouette of a pony’s head, with twelve tiny full body silhouettes forming a circle around it.
“This is the sign of the group known as the Twelve Ponies. We believe they are the ones responsible for unleashin’ this havoc across Equestria.” Granny Smith stated as she placed the picture back onto the table in front of her.
Spitfire took off her glasses and said, “We want you to track them down in the past, and bring us back information regarding their activities. Once you find out who exactly is behind all of this, one of us will travel back to that time and confront them. Do you understand?”
Twilight slowly nodded.
“Can I do anything in the past to prevent this from happening in the first place?”
The scientists all looked down at the table in front of them and closed their eyes.
Twilight looked agitated, “Really? There’s nothing we can do? There has to be a way to-“
Applejack interrupted her, “Now don’t you go all crazy on us, tryin’ to change the future and whatnot. It just ain’t gonna work, Twilight. All you’ll end up doin’ is messin’ up the timeline even more, so just stick to the plan and bring us that information!”
Cheerilee adjusted her glasses and cleared her throat.
“Well, Twilight? Are you ready?”
Rarity was setting up backstage in the Carousel Boutique, preparing herself for her latest fashion show. She was applying the finishing touches to her makeup, and making sure each of her dresses was in proper shape.
“Oh, Opalescence, do you think I put on too much blush?”
Opal meowed dismissively and walked away.
“Hmph. Be that way.”
A small crowd of ten to fifteen ponies had gathered in the main room of the Carousel Boutique, whispering amongst themselves in anticipation of witnessing Rarity’s brand new fashion line.
The curtains burst open, and glitter flew out from backstage and onto the crowd. Rarity slowly walked in as a soft, elegant orchestral song began to emanate throughout the boutique.
Rarity cleared her throat and the song faded out.
“Thank you all for coming to see my fashion show tonight! I have just finished my latest line, as you all know, and would like to show it off to all of Ponyville! Feast your eyes on this, Cupcake Flair!”
Several model ponies walked onto the stage as Rarity stepped down, all wearing colorful silk dresses adorned with patterns that resembled various sweets. Lollipops, ice cream sundaes, cakes, and donuts embodied the tone of this fashion line. The crowd roared with applause.
After the models had made a few rounds of the walkway, Rarity made her way back onto the stage.
“Thank you, thank you all so much for your praise. If anypony is interested, I’m holding a special sale in a few moments. I’m going to be selling my latest book, ‘Putting It All Together’, which details the intricate strategies I use in developing my dresses!”
Rarity was now sitting in a chair with a small oval table in front of her, positioned near the entrance to the Carousel Boutique. Ponies were lining up to purchase her book, and she was giving each one personal autographs.
“One for you, and one for you...” Rarity said, as she handed out books left and right.
A gray pegasus with a blonde mane appeared and purchased one of the books. She spoke as Rarity was signing the book.
“What’s your opinion on muffins?”
“Oh, why, I love them.”
“You love them, or you love to eat them?”
Rarity looked up at the pegasus, puzzled. She took note of the odd wall-eyed expression of the inquisitive pony.
“Um, I’m not sure I fully understand the question...”
The pegasus took her book and left. Rarity was confused for a moment, but quickly regained her composure and continued to sign books.
As the final guests left and Rarity planned to lock up the Boutique, a mysterious figure grabbed her before she could close the front door, and dragged her outside.
The figure tossed Rarity into a wagon and hopped into it with her, and then placed one hoof on her mouth to keep her quiet. The figure slowly took off their mask and revealed their identity to her.
“Twilight?!” Rarity exclaimed.
“What in the wide wide world of Equestria are you doing?”
“There’s no time to explain. The Twelve Ponies are going to unleash insane cupcakes onto the entire world, and all of ponykind will be forced to consume them until they lose their free will. The cupcakes are going to destroy ALL OF US!”
Twilight was screaming at the top of her lungs and nearly causing Rarity to faint. Several ponies had gathered around the wagon by now, and were trying to figure out what was going on.
Rarity peeked out from the wagon and waved to the crowd.
“Don’t fret, everypony. Twilight is just a little short on sleep and-“
“RARITY! Don’t tell them anything! A member of the Twelve Ponies might be among them, spying on us! Hurry, you have to take me to Fillydelphia. GO!” Twilight hopped up and screamed, frantically shaking her hooves around, desperately trying to coerce Rarity into pulling the wagon away.
“There’s a record player in Fillydelphia that I can use to communicate to the scientists from my time! I have to tell them I made it here! I have to give them information!” Twilight grabbed Rarity and shook her back and forth as she raved on and on.
A doctor from the Ponyville hospital quickly showed up.
“I’ll take it from here.” He said as he and an assistant picked up Twilight, who was now restrained in a stretcher.
“You fools! You’re making a huge mistake! Let me gooooooo!”
The sound of somepony’s voice gradually caused Twilight Sparkle to awaken from her slumber. When she awoke, she found herself in a bed within the Ponyville hospital. Somepony was talking with the doctor out in the hallway. She could see their shadows behind the window of her closed door.
“Is it visiting hours yet?”
“You just asked that.”
“Well, is it?”
“No, Pinkie, it’s not visiting hours yet.”
A brief moment of silence occurred. During this silence, Twilight looked over at the desk next to her and spotted a small cupcake, complete with its wrapper. This would be the perfect piece of evidence the scientists would need! As she picked it up, the voices outside continued.
“How about now?”
“NO, Pinkie!”
Twilight suddenly began to panic. She didn’t have anywhere to hide this cupcake. How would she bring it back to the future without arousing suspicion in the present? What if the Twelve Ponies caught on to her? The voices outside the room continued once more.
“Now?”
“Yes, fine, YES. It’s visiting hours now. Go in and see her.”
“Whoopee!”
The door flew open and Pinkie Pie cartwheeled into the room, stopping short in front of Twilight’s bed. A wide grin was plastered on her face. Twilight quickly stuffed the cupcake into her mouth, unable to think of any other alternative.
“Hey Twilight, I thought you were off studying the breezies in their special land or something.”
Twilight’s eyes widened as she swallowed the cupcake.
“Wait, what did you just say? I’m off studying the breezies right now?”
“Yeah, you said you’d be gone for months, but here you are. Did that many months pass already, or something?”
‘Oh no, the scientists sent me too far back! Ugh!’ Twilight thought to herself. The time travel spell must not have been perfectly cast, because Twilight realized she had been sent a few months too far back from the intended time. Luckily, this meant she didn’t have to worry about any paradoxes involving her present self. She was off in the land of breezies studying their lives.
Pinkie pulled open the curtains in the room and looked out the window.
“Oh, hey, look! I forgot that today’s National Cupcake Day. Everypony’s outside eating cupcakes and muffins and stuff.”
Hearing the names of those foods made Twilight cringe. She reluctantly peeked out the window and observed. She saw the many denizens of Ponyville munching on cupcakes and other baked goods, completely oblivious to the terror that awaited them.
“I had forgotten what it was like... to feel the sunshine... to breathe clean, fresh air...”
Twilight laughed and cried simultaneously as the memories of her pre-crisis life flowed back into her mind. Her mane was completely cut up and in complete disarray overall. Her travel through time had messed her up pretty badly; physically and mentally.
Pinkie looked quite concerned.
“Say, Twilight. Why do you have that eye patch on?”
Twilight touched her eye patch.
“Oh, this? It’s necessary to block out the seething gaze of the sentient pies and such. If I looked at them with both of my eyes, I’d be infected for sure.”
Pinkie blinked twice, laughed, and collapsed onto the floor.
“Twilight, are you going loco?” The pink pony asked as she got back up and peeked out the window again.
“Although, wouldn’t it be cool if we could talk to cakes and muffins? That’s a totally awesome idea! You should make a spell for that, Twilight!”
Twilight looked out at the happy Ponyville citizens, smacking their lips and chomping away, consuming the treats. A look of sadness enveloped her face.
“But, if they were alive... wouldn’t they be sad?” Twilight asked.
Pinkie Pie was puzzled, “Why would they be sad?”
Twilight pointed towards the Cupcake Day festival outside.
Pinkie nodded, “Oh, because they’re being eaten all the time? Yeah, I guess that would be kinda depressing. I mean, now that you mention it, I never really considered how the cupcakes feel, being treated like that...”
Twilight sighed in disgust and lay back down in her bed, appalled at the cruel treatment of the cupcakes.
“Maybe ponykind deserved to be wiped out.”
“Umm, that’s a bit harsh don’t you think, Twili-“
Pinkie looked back at the bed Twilight was in and gasped in surprise. She had vanished.
