Sempiternal

My eyesight was hazy and my ears were ringing so loudly that everything else was inaudible to me. I could however feel a sharp burning pain in my side and placed my hand at the source to see my hand covered in blood. I slump my head painfully towards the side where the pain was coming from to see a burning orange light and a pool of crimson red fluid on the road flowing through my uniform before I lost consciousness.

It would have been better if I had just died instead. But I woke up a day later to the blinding white lights of a infirmary. I could feel the tender wound sting and burn as I sat up from the bed and violently ripped off the numerous wires and clips from my body. I had a deep distrust of doctors and was only thinking of getting out of that building and back to my dorm.

I get off the bed and rip the paper gown off my body and look around for some kind of clothing to sneak out of the building with. A nurse enters my room alerted by the ruckus I was making a few moments later to see me buck naked searching the rooms closet for clothes. I heard the door open and had a stare down with this pretty young woman with a bright smile and beautiful green eyes. She was surprised to me up and active and pleaded with me to return to my bed.

I wasn't going to do no such thing and ran up and grabbed her by the arms and threw her on my bed. She started to struggle furiously as I bound her hands and feet with the IV tube. When she tried to call out for help I grabbed a piece of medical gauze on the table and wrapped it firmly around her mouth. She just laid there and tossed about as I grab what was left of my belongings.

I had my military ID and wallet which is all I needed and grabbed a nurses outfit made for the delivery of babies. Right before I walked out the door I look to the horrified face of the nurse I had bound and gagged staring back at me and apologized. I then hit the call button and calmly walked out the door.

I had no trouble at all exiting the building and to the street corner of the big city. It was kind of hard to wave a taxi in the city with blood streaming down my side but finally got one willing to take me back to base. From what I could see in the car I was still in Kiev and only minutes away from our forward operating base.

The taxi man drops me off by the city limits and I pay double my fare and thanked him kindly and waved him off before he got too close to the gates. I then walked a short distance up to the checkpoint where they drew their weapons and I instinctively put my hands towards the sky. They pat me down and my wallet falls out of the side pocket onto the pavement. One of the officers cautiously picked it up and opened it. He takes a good look at the ID inside and back at me before he closes and said. "I'm sorry to have done this but the entire base has been on lock down and everyone is to be searched. But it's good to see you back so soon."

I rip my wallet from his hand and nod as I walk past the booth into the base. I had only one thing on my mind as I ran to my dormitory. When I reached my trailer I was in shock to see all of my belongings and personal items scattered on the dirt like trash and the door was left wide open. I rush inside and look for my tiny friend in a completely bare and deserted living area

I couldnt find her any where inside the small cabin. And frantically rushed outside where my things were thrown when my eyes fixed on something small and White near the fence surrounding the base. I sprinted and prayed silently towards the object hoping they had just left her alone and she was waiting for my return.

I came only feet away from the object when my eyes rested upon a most God awful and emotionally scarring scene as the only friend I had ever had lay dead and motionless on the ground. I kneel down in disbelief and petted her side trying to wake her only to feel her body was as cold as a winter breeze. I pick her up gently and press her tightly against my chest. And I could feel the tears stream down my face and held her there in my arms.

I then wished I would have just died that day of the bombing and spared me this heartbreak. Nothing else could had brought me so much pain. Not even when I was ripped from my mother or under the hardest crucible of training the government could dish out I never shed not one tear ever. But her death had hurt me more than ever and filled my heart with sick bloodthirsty rage.

An officer on patrol spotted me and asked if I was okay. I could sense the lack of concern in his thoughts and knew that he wasn't responsible for what had happened and looked up at him with bloodshot and teared up eyes as I showed him my lifeless friend and asked. "How could they do this? What happened?"

He covered his mouth and gasped as I continued to bawl my eyes out still holding her. He walks over to my side and places a hand on my shoulder as he said softly. "Im so sorry, after the bombings our commander ordered all of the barracks for immediate search and seizure."

I shrug his hand off of my shoulder and walked back to the mess outside that was my personal belongings and gently set my tiny friend on the mud streaked mattress as I got my uniform on and my fold out shovel. I walked off base and into the frost covered evergreen forest . My wounds were still bleeding profusely and I could feel the stitches rip and tear my skin with every shovel of dirt I labored furiously to push up. I then buried her next to the tree I found her past my checkpoint and placed her favorite tennis ball that gave us so many hours of enjoyment.

I stood quietly for several minutes as the biting cold wind had calmed my senses. I felt so weak and ashamed of myself that I couldn't protect her from harm. The rage within me grew even hotter and my only thoughts at that point were revenge.

I return to my empty dorm besides the mattress and pillow I had picked up out of the yard and laid it on the floor and cried myself to sleep for the rest of the afternoon clear up until midnight. I woke up with dry groggy eyes with my body still bleeding and sore and stiff from my injuries. It was then that I made a very uncharacteristic decision.

I cleaned myself up as best I could and headed down the empty road of our base. I go to the armory and pick up my service rifle and a belt full of grenades that they just handed over to me. I made it look like I was going on patrol and exited loaded to the teeth with explosives.

The senior officers that were in charge of daily operations all slept in a duplex with their quarters all lined up at the other end of the base. I reach the building and take a quick peek inside. They were all sound asleep unaware of the Hell I was going to unleash upon them.