Will you Smile Already?!?!

by Discorded SheepcityUSA

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Cheese Sandwich, Pie Sisters, Comedy, Random, Maud Pie, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life
Length: 3302

The Super Duper Party Pony meets the most uninteresting mare in Equestria

It's Maud Pie's birthday at the rock farm, and Pinkie has brought all of her friends along for the ride to celebrate. All the festivities even caught the attention of a certain party-pony's Cheesy Sense, prompting him to make his way there.

But when he sees that he can't get Maud to show any emotion whatsoever, he starts to believe he's losing his touch...

Published 2014-03-18 02:10:08 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-10 03:10:43 UTC

Arrival of the Super-Duper Party Pony

Author's Note

Based off of a weird dream I had last night.

So we've already seen how the rest of the Mane Six reacted to Pinkie's very depressing sister, so let's see how well Cheese Sandwich fairs. :D

Arrival of the Super-Duper Party Pony

Will You Smile Already?!?!

A small park in Manehatten has become the epicenter of insanity. It was a nine-year old colt’s birthday party, and it had to be the most epic sight for any foal that had attended. Fireworks, gigantic balloons, and the cake…

Oh dear Celestia the cake was enormous! A full grown dragon wouldn’t even be able to finish that thing!

Yes siree it was quite a fun time for everypony. And amidst all the festivities, the planner of said birthday party leaned up against a tree in the park, his western hat covering most of his face, quietly observing his masterpiece. The visible part of his face had been his mouth, which was smiling with a large grin.

Obviously he was quite proud of his work.

“We’ve done good Boneless Two. Very good indeed.” He said sounding rather serious for a moment to the rubber chicken sitting on his hat.

This stallion was known as Cheese Sandwich. One of the greatest party planners in all of Equestria, or as he preferred his title, “The Super-Duper-Party-Pony”

Cheese put a noisemaker into his mouth and blew into it, letting out a loud and festive “Bzzzt!”

“Hehe. Never get tired of these things…This is an unpredictable business Boneless Two. Plannin’ party after party after party. Ya never know when one’s just gonna-“ Cheese stopped midsentence as his entire body began to wriggle and twitch in an unpredictable and crazy fashion; his eyes grew huge, and the cheese in the sandwich on his Cutie Mark started to stretch out.

As soon as his Cheesy Sense ceased, the grin on his face grew wider.

“Yowzers! See what I mean?! I don’t think my Cheesy Sense has gone off like THAT since Ponyville! I think this is THE BIG ONE!” Cheese said as he happily hopped out of his western attire, revealing his yellow, collared shirt.

“So, where’re we headed this time? Huh? Huh? Huh?” Cheese asked himself before standing silent for a few moments.

After a few seconds, his happy face turned into one of slight confusion.

“There’s a party goin’ down at a rock farm? A rock farm…wat?” He asked himself again.

Cheese shrugged as he put his hat back on his head, picked Boneless Two up, and threw him over his back.

“Well…alright then if you’re sure that’s the place. The Cheesy Sense has been right every time so far, no reason to question it now…WAIT, AM I NOT TRUSTING MY OWN BRAIN?! WHO CAN I TRUST IF I CAN’T TRUST MYSELF?!” Cheese eccentrically shouted at himself, earning the confused stares of most of the ponies currently attending the party.

Cheese shook his head.

“Focus Cheese. Somepony, somewhere is in need of a party, and you’re gonna give it to them or my name isn’t Daisy Sassafras…and it’s not” Cheese laughed at his own joke as he trotted in the direction wherever his Cheesy Sense was leading him…

Depressing.

That’s the best way to describe the rock farm on which Pinkie Pie grew up. Downright depressing. The sky was dark, there was no grass anywhere, and everything was grey.

Oh and surprise, surprise. There’s rocks everywhere.

But at the moment, the spirits there were being lifted fairly well thanks to Pinkie Pie and her friends. For it was Pinkie’s sister’s, Maud Pie’s, birthday, and being the party pony she was, Pinkie was zooming all around the farm setting up giant banners, tying down balloons, and wheeling in a ton of pastries, all at a speed that would make Rainbow Dash green with envy.

The Mane Six and Pinkie’s family, Maud included, all watched as Pinkie zoomed around the rock farm, performing her various tasks.

“I never did find out where she got all that energy from.” Igneous Rock, Pinkie’s father, said to the five mares.

“She likes sugar…a lot.” Twilight said.

“How is she moving that fast?! Just…HOW?!” Rainbow shouted.

“Really Rainbow? Yall’re gonna question Pinkie logic?” Applejack asked.

Upon realizing what she just said, Rainbow Dash facehoofed

“Oh right. What was I thinking?” Rainbow mumbled.

Limestone, Pinkie’s mother, turned to Maud, who appeared to be looking off into space with a blank stare.

“This is just so nice of your sister to come and help plan your birthday isn’t it Maud?” she asked.

“Mmhm.” Maud mumbled with no emotion whatsoever.

Pinkie came to a screeching halt in front of her friends and family, kicking up a ton of dust and dirt.

“Pinkie Pie, could you please try not to kick up so much dust everywhere? I just had my coat shined.” Rarity said as she dusted off her coat with a hoof.

“Oops. Hehe. Sorry Rarity. I’m just so excited that it’s Maud’s birthday party! I’ve just got to make sure it’s super-de-duper extra special awesome!~” Pinkie squealed.

Pinkie’s sisters, Inkie and Blinkie both smiled.

“Well, you’re doing a real good job Pinkie!” Inkie said.

“Yeah, I don’t think we’ve ever seen Maud so excited!” Blinkie said, pointing at Maud, who was still standing motionless and without a real expression on her face.

“Umm, yeah. She sure looks…happy.” Fluttershy squeaked.

“I know right! She looks like she hardly contain hers-“ Pinkie froze midsentence as she stopped her bouncing with a shocked expression on her face.

“Pinkamena dear, are you alright?” Igneous asked.

Suddenly, Pinkie’s body began to twitch and wriggle at impossible angles, and she started to vibrate, sliding her across the dirt ground.

Once she stopped, she let out a huge gasp as she hopped into the air.

“That was a HUGE one! My Pinkie Sense is telling me that something BIG is gonna happen!” she shouted.

“Big? Big how? Like exciting? Dangerous? What?” Twilight asked.

Pinkie put a hoof to her chin.

“I dunno. But something tells me it has to do with that big, yellow meteor heading straight for us.” Pinkie said, pointing a fast-flying object in the sky heading toward them.

“WHAT?!” Everypony except for Maud screamed in unison.

The flying thing flew right over their heads and slammed into a nearby boulder, causing it to split in half, and the object to land on the ground, kicking up large amounts of dirt, causing it to fly onto the ponies.

“Oh come on now! Again?!” Rarity yelled.

Once the dust cleared, the figure of a disoriented Cheese Sandwich wearing a helmet lay in the middle of the split rock.

“In hindsight, maybe I should’ve taken the train…Oh well! Hahaha!” Cheese laughed as he hopped off the ground, threw the helmet off his head and faced the ponies before him and became quite excited when he saw Pinkie.

“PINKIE!” he cheered.

Pinkie let out another surprised, over-exaggerated gasp.

“OMIGOSH ITSCHEESE!” Pinkie squealed as she galloped over and gave him a huge Pinkie Pie Trademarked Hug.

After a few seconds, Pinkie broke the hug, and the two started to catch up.

“How’s the party business been treatin’ ya Cheesy? Fun isn’t it? Did your Cheesy Sense tell you there was gonna be a party here? Huhhuhhuh?” Pinkie eagerly asked.

Cheese nodded so hard it looked like his neck would snap.

“Yup. Told me there was gonna be a party at a rock farm while I was in Manehatten, so I stuck myself in my cannon and well…here I am!” Cheese said.

Twilight shook her head in disbelief.

“You…shot yourself out of a canon all the way from Manehatten?” she asked.

“Yup!” Cheese said with his head held high.

“Umm Pinkamena dear? Not that we aren’t happy to meet your friend, but who exactly IS he?” Limestone asked her daughter.

“Oh right you haven’t met! Silly me! This is Cheese Sandwich! He’s a Party Pony just like me!~” Pinkie introduced Cheese.

“Nice to meet you Mr. Sandwich.” Igneous said, shaking Cheese’s hoof…

Big mistake considering how vigorous Cheese was.

“Well howdy! Always nice to meet new buddies!” Cheese exclaimed.

Once Igneous’ hoof managed to escape Cheese’s wrath, he started to rub it to get rid of the pain.

“Hehe. Right…” he said.

Igneous, Inkie, and Blinkie introduced themselves afterwards, as well as reconnecting with Pinkie’s friends, but Maud seemed to be the only distant one.

Cheese took notice that Maud wasn’t exactly trying to introduce herself, so he decided to make the first move.

“Yeello! Name’s Cheese Sandwich! Put er there buddy!” Cheese said, holding out his hoof for a high-hoof. Maud just stood there and stared looking like she didn’t really care for his company.

“…Uhhh, alright?” Cheese said, smiling sheepishly.

Cheese leaned in near Applejack’s ear and whispered.

“Yeesh, who’s the buzzkill?” he asked.

“That’s Pinkie’s sister Maud. Her sense of humor is kinda…dry.” She said.

“Oh yeah! Cheese, this is my sister Maud! This party we’re throwing is for her birthday! Go ahead Maud, say hi!” Pinkie said cheerily, pulling Maud close to her shoulder.

“Mmm. Hi.” She mumbled.

There was an odd silence between the party pony and the rock researcher that seemed to last forever, until Rainbow broke it.

“Wow, you can just feel the awkward.” She said.

Maud let out a slight cough.

“Could you give me a minute? I kinda need a drink.” She said, walking to the punch table, Pinkie trailing not too far behind to get some for herself.

When both of them were out of earshot, Cheese spoke up.

“…Something tells me that Maud doesn’t like me.” He said with his ears folded to the sides of his head.

“Oh nonsense darling; Maud just doesn’t show much enthusiasm over…well… anything.” Rarity assured him.

“But it’s her birthday isn’t it? Surely she should be happier than that.” Cheese said.

“Well, she was in Ponyville a couple of weeks ago, and it took a while, but we managed to make friends with her. Though she kind of contains her excitement.” Fluttershy whispered.

Upon hearing his friend’s explanation of Maud’s personality, he stomped his hoof and stood in a heroic-looking stance.

“Well that just WILL NOT do! With Celestia as my witness, I vow to get that pony to laugh if it’s the last thing I do!” Cheese promised himself.

Twilight facehoofed.

“I think someone needs to explain reality to this stallion.” She said.

A Very Awkward Conversation

The entire snack table was entirely covered in several varieties of party foods. Candy, fruit punch, tiny sandwiches and, unsurprisingly, Pinkie Pie’s signature dish, cupcakes. Maud didn’t exactly care for sugar as much as her sister did, but seeing as how Pinkie was her sister, she always tolerated her special brand of silliness.

Maud’s throat was beginning to get a little dry from the dusty air of the rock farm, so she figured she’d quench her thirst with some of the punch at the table. She poured herself a glass of the sweet, pink substance. The liquid did indeed seem like something Pinkie’s mind would conjure up. It was incredibly bubbly and looked like it had about a metric ton of sugar put into it. Maud found herself incredibly tolerant and immune to the effects of sugar. She didn’t always eat or drink it, but when she did, no matter how much it was, she never even twitched.

Maud silently took a sip of the punch…

Only to find a certain, green-eyed stallion staring back at her with a huge grin on his face.

“Hiya Maud! Me again!” Cheese said happily, hoping to help brighten Maud’s seemingly bored mood.

Maud had been conditioned to handle surprises fairly well, having being the exposed to the antics of the most energetic pony to ever live for so long, so this wasn’t anything particularly new to her. Keeping true to her nature, Maud didn’t even flinch when Cheese came into view.

“Sooooo, I can’t help but feel that we maaaay have gotten off on a bit of a...”Cheese paused for a moment and observed the surrounding field of rocks and boulders.

“…Rocky start.” Cheese put his hoof to his mouth to try and keep himself from laughing too hard at his own joke.

If Maud had been known to show emotion, she might’ve laughed at that one, considering the rock pun. However, Maud didn’t seem to pay it any mind and just went back to idly sipping her punch.

Cheese was slightly taken back. Ponies would always laugh at his jokes. He had been known all throughout Equestria for his ability to make ponies laugh. Only about once or twice did he come across a particularly difficult case with a stubborn little colt or filly that had a dry sense of humor.

But this mare didn’t look like she was even breathing. He almost felt the urge to get a stethoscope and listen to her heartbeat to check if Maud was even considered medically alive.

But if he was going to succeed in his mission, he couldn’t look discouraged. Not even for a second.

“Hehehehe! So anyway, how’re ya likin’ the party? Fun right? Oh who am I kidding? Of course it is! Pinkie’s throwing it, so how could it NOT be fun?” Cheese exclaimed, still wearing that same happy grin.

“Mmm. It’s nice.” Maud mumbled, slightly looking at the ground, observing a few rocks at her hooves.

Cheese suddenly raised an eyebrow and slightly frowning. She didn’t quite look like she was enjoying herself all that much. Was he missing something?

“Really? I’d think you’d be acting a little more…jovial.” Cheese said.

Maud shrugged.

“I get that a lot. I’m just not all that into balloons…or candy…or party hats.” Maud continued to go through the seemingly endless things she couldn’t care much about.

Maud then reached into her dress’s pocket, and pulled a small rock out of it. She then proceeded to drop it into the punch glass. Cheese looked back at her questioningly.

“Boulder was thirsty.” Maud said.

Cheese was starting to actually find it increasingly difficult to try and come across as funny around this mare without it just being awkward. Cheese could almost swear that this conversation was so boring that it was beginning to suck the enthusiasm out of him like a vacuum.

He may need to call in back up for this one.

“Hey Pinkie! Mind comin’ over here for a second?” Cheese called to his friend from across the farm, who was in the middle of a hoof-biting game of Twister between Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and her sisters…

Unfortunately, Pinkie had apparently been the pony right smack in the middle of the bundle, so when she bounced out of the picture, everypony else lost their balance and fell flat on their faces with a loud THUMP!

“Ooooooogh, that was painful…Twi, who won?” Rainbow asked Twilight, who was holding the color wheel in her magic.

“You all fell at the same time. So from a scientific standpoint…there is no clear winner.” Twilight said.

Applejack and Rainbow both groaned in annoyance and facehoofed.

“Dagnabit.” Applejack groaned.

“I swear on my wings that I will beat you at this game someday Applejack.” Rainbow vowed.

“Cheer up girls, it was still pretty fun!” Inkie said with a slight grin.

“Wow, are these two always this competitive?” Blinkie asked Twilight with a tilted head.

“You haven’t the slightest idea.” Twilight said with a deadpanned look.

Pinkie happily bounced her way to her sister and Cheese at the snack table, still retaining her usual grin despite having forfeited a game of Twister.

“Hiya Cheese! What’s up? You and Maud getting’ along?” Pinkie asked cheerfully.

“Weeeell…your sister sure is quite a party animal.” Cheese said with a somewhat forced smile as he looked between Maud, who was still staring at Boulder sitting in the punch glass, and Pinkie.

“Errrrm…You know what? Has Maud’s pet rock met Boneless yet? I bet they’d get along really well.” Cheese suggested.

Pinkie all of a sudden started to look a little uncomfortable, and she looked slightly toward the ground.

“Uhhhhh…yeah, about Boneless…”

“Urrrrgh! C’mon Boneless! Give us that key!” Pinkie demanded as she strangled the rubber chicken.

“I don’t think that’s going to work.” Twilight said with a slight frown.

Pinkie, in her frustration, threw Boneless at Twilight, which caused the rubber chicken to collide with the Tree of Harmony’s box, and envelope it in a purple light. The mares and Spike all gasped as they watched Boneless transform into a golden key, resembling Pinkie’s Cutie-Mark, and levitate itself into the lock.

Pinkie was in a sense of awe, and a slight sense of mourning at the same time.

‘Oh boy…Cheese is gonna kill me…well, at least we know where the keys are now!’ Pinkie thought to herself, trying to stay cheerful.

“Umm…let’s just say that he found his calling.” Pinkie said nervously.

Cheese raised an eyebrow.

“Set out on his own huh? Well, nice to hear he’s doing well.” Cheese said with a smile.

“Yeaaaah…”

If Maud was capable of showing interest, she probably would have. She still addressed the matter.

“Who’s Boneless?” Maud asked.

Cheese turned back to Maud.

“Oh, that’s right! You two never met. Well, Boneless was a good friend of mine that used to travel with me, planning parties all throughout Equestria! I gave him to Pinkie when I left Ponyville a couple months back.” Cheese answered.

“What’d Boneless look like?” Maud asked.

Cheese reached a hoof into his mane, and a few cluttering sounds came from inside of it, as if there was quite a lot stashed up there. Eventually, Cheese pulled Boneless Two out of his mane.

“This is Boneless’ brother, Boneless Two. They look a lot alike.” Cheese said, holding Boneless Two in front of Maud’s stoic face.

“…You know that rubber chicken isn’t actually sentient right?” Maud asked.

Cheese lowered Boneless Two and had a confused frown on his face.

“...Well…couldn’t you say the same thing about Boulder?” Cheese asked.

Even though she didn’t show it, Maud was relentlessly fighting the nearly unbeatable urge to strangle Cheese on the spot after making that comment.

Cheese didn’t pick up on it, seeing as he found it much too difficult to read Maud’s face, but Pinkie could definitely sense what Maud was thinking, and popped up between the two, booping both of their muzzles.

“Woah, guys! Let’s try to keep the tension on the down low m’kay? Say Cheese, why don’t you and Maud talk about your interests, hmmmm?” Pinkie asked, hoping she could change the subject and keep the peace.

“Hmmm…alrighty! I like cake, balloons, disco-balls, fruit punch, board games, the accordion, smiling, cake-“

“You already said cake.” Maud pointed out.

“Hehehehe. I know! I just reaaally like cake! So Maud, what about you?” Cheese asked.

Maud could tell that Pinkie was genuinely trying to help her and Cheese get along, so she pushed her sudden anger at Cheese to the back of her mind, and tried to humor both party ponies.

“…I like rocks.” Maud said.

Cheese put on another slightly forced smile.

“Hehe…riveting.” He said nervously.

‘Oh boy…this one could pose a problem.’ He thought to himself.

Author's Note

Guys, I am sooooo sorry this took so long to get done. When I went into this fic, I only thought it'd get like, 50 views at MOST. The popularity this fic got in such a short amount of time hit me like a ton of bricks, and I was under a lot of pressure for the second chapter. I was also not entirely confident in my ability for writing Cheese or Maud because this was my first time writing for either of them.

I'll do my best to update this more regularly.