Vampiress in Equestria

by Dubious

Rating: teen
Tags: King Sombra, Alternate Universe, Human, Twilight Sparkle, Anthro, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike
Length: 18087

A vampiress finds herself in Equestria, how will our millenia old protagonist handle it?

"Valdrite, a land of eternal overcast and gloom, fulled with hulking monstrosities and slithering stalkers. Beasts of myth and heroes of might. Gods of light and demons of darkness. Truly, a land for the adventurous" - Excerpt from The Guide to Valdrite: How not to die instantly

Amena Winterfall is one of the three oldest vampires in the world and the most powerful of them all, though her existence is unknown to all but two individuals. She may look frail, but she holds a trove of knowledge matched only by the gods. Looked after by her good friend Eldren the Blood mage, she has learnt to channel the natural magicks of the world to her bidding. When an unknown enemy attacks her home, she is sent to another world in order to survive the ensuing onslaught of the unknowns attack.

Features King Sombra being sent to school as a little colt as punishment for being both stupid and evil.

Published 2014-03-20 12:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-28 15:06:00 UTC

Bloody Introductions

This is so much fun! I thought as I continued chasing after the, clearly, terrified demon in front of me. As I was getting closer, the damn thing up and teleported back to the Blood Realm, denying me my fun. "Aw shoot! I was sooooooo close!" I grumped as I stomp back the way I came, stepping over felled trees and overturned boulders. As I walk through the forest, I spot a river. Taking a sniff, I decide that a quick wash up before returning home couldn't hurt, it'd certainly make Eldren happy knowing I'm not covered in dirt and mud. I strip naked as I walk over to the river, testing the waters with my foot whilst looking around for any potential witnesses. I finish my sweep satisfied, and begin wading into the river.

I stop as I reach waist high waters, and begin rubbing water all over myself to remove any dirt from me. Whilst scrubbing, I decide to ponder what Eldren could be up to, he clearly didn't remember my birthday today, so he was obviously throwing me a surprise party. With a nod of satisfaction at my cleanliness, I begin wading to shore to begin washing my clothes, only to find them missing. Looking around frantically, I notice an imp riffling through my pockets for something shiny. Scrunching my face up with indignity, I take in a deep breath. "HEY! Gimme back my clothes you stupid imp!" I bellow at the top of my lungs, causing the trees to violently shake and shed most of their leaves. To say the imp is surprised would be an understatement, it looks like it's about to poo out it's entrails in fear.

With a look of scorn in my eyes, I march over to the cowering imp and snatch back my clothes before punting him through the forests canopy. Nodding with success, I return to the shore and lay my clothes out. I then begin collecting rocks to set up and raised drying rack and to scrub my clothes with. Returning with and arm load of rocks, I set up my drying pit and set about scrubbing my clothes clean whilst idly whistling a merry tune. Pausing, I check to see how clean my shirt is. I note with happiness that it is entirely clean, and set it on a large stone next to the drying pit and begin cleaning my pants with gusto, can't look like an urchin for my surprise party!

I continue whistling as I clean my pants, missing entirely the sound of something smashing into the drying pit. Continuing my task, I once again turned to pondering my "surprise" party. I wonder if there'll be cake and cookies! Or, or ice-cream or pudding, or muffins, or cupcakes, or lollies, or milkshakes! I grin maniacally as I continue pondering all the delicious confectionery treats that could be at my party, with thoughts of sugary goodness in my head, I begin scrubbing harder and then inspect my work, noting yet again, perfect cleanliness. I proceed to place it on the drying pit and then begin lightly scrubbing my undies. After a few seconds I deem them to be clean enough, and swirl my socks around and then beat them several times on a nearby treant. I then set them next to the drying pit alongside my undies, and begin looking for some tinder.

"Hey, mister Treant, may I have some of your twigs so I can start a fire?" I ask the treant, with an innocent grin on my face. The sound of shifting bark and cracking branches greets my ears as the treant slowly moves to face me.

"And why would I give up some of my being to one who beat me with cloth?" The treant asked with a deep raspy voice.

"Because today is my birthday and I need to dry my clothes, else I'll have to return home sopping wet and without any clothes. Eldren would likely beat me if I did that," I say with a slight pout laced with puppy eyes.

"Oh, and how are you turning, little one?" The treant asked inquisitively.

I think for a minute on how to answer him. I could tell him how old I am turning, or I could just tell them the last digit of how old I'm turning. Deciding upon the latter, I open my mouth. "I'm turning nine!" I squeal with delight.

"Ho-ho! Looks like we have ourselves a big girl here!" The treant boomed with a boisterous laugh. "And what might your name be, little miss big girl?"

"I'm Amena. Amena Winterfall," I say politely, bowing whilst doing so.

"Such manners, that's the kind of thing you don't see in the youth of today. I am Meldtree, I live here," Meldtree said with a hint of joviality in his voice. "Tell you what, since you're an especially well mannered young lady, I'll give you a gift to help you celebrate your birthday," Meldtree said as he turned slightly and began rummaging through the undergrowth, depositing some twigs in front og me whilst doing so. "Make your fire little one, this may take some time," he said before resuming his rummaging. With a shout of thanks, I pick up the sticks and skip over to my drying pit, carefully placing them in a precise pattern, before inhaling lightly and exhaling directly onto the twigs, causing them to spark and catch alight. With a squeal of joy, I collect a few larger sticks and place them in a pyramid formation above the newly birthed fire.

Sitting on a larger rock next to the growing flame, I hear the sound of bark scraping together and turn around to see Meldtree holding a strange glowing green stone. "A natura stone, it will allow you to convene with the plants and ask them for their assistance. I hope this treats you will, young miss," he says with a look of fulfilment.

"Thank you, mister Meldtree, sir! I will cherish it always and I'll make sure to come back and visit you sometime," I say whilst bounding forward to hug Meldtree, earning me a happy laugh.

"I am sure you will, Amena, but I had best get back to minding the riverside, lest some enterprising monster tries to kidnap you for nefarious purposes."

"Oh, don't worry mister Meldtree, Eldren taught me how to take care of myself, but I thank you for your kind offer," I say as I check my clothes, finding that they are sufficiently dry. I begin to slip them on, when I hear a light chuckle from behind me. Turning around with my undies around my upper thighs, I behold a towering lupine figure.

"Hello there, youngling. What would one such as yourself being doing out in a forest like this?" The creature asked, licking lips with a hungry look in its eyes.

"Oh, Eldren told me to go out and play whilst he set something up. Why do you ask, Mister?" I ask quizzically.

"Surely he must know the dangers of this forest!" The creature says, miming a strike to the heart.

"Of course he does, that's why he taught me to protect myself when I'm away from the cave," I reply with a smile and closed eyes, unaware of the encroaching monster.

"Well, I'm sure he's missing you. Though I guess he'll never truly get over you, won't he?" The monster asks, slowly creeping towards me.

"What are you talking about?" I ask opening my eyes, to witness the creature lunging towards me, only to be smacked away by a tree branch.

"I thought you said you could protect yourself, young miss?" Meldtree asked standing next to me.

"I thought he wanted to be friends," I say with a hint of sadness.

"There, there," He says, patting me on the back, "Not all creatures of the forest are as nice as I am, and will try and use you for their own purposes. Now then, I'd suggest you get dressed, young miss, and head on home, Your father must be worried sick about you!" Meldtree said, keeping an eye out for the creature in case it returned.

"Okay, mister Meldtree, sir," I say before I finish pulling on my undies and begin the process of adorning my pants and shirt.

I have been walking through the forest for several dozen minutes, and I know I am nearing the cave. Looking around, I spot several landmarks indicating my proximity to my home. Looking around, I spot a dark recess in a nearby cliff face, with a smile I gleefully skip towards the cave entrance and an ever increasing low humming sound. Upon making it to the halfway mark, my progress is halted by an eight foot tall blood red individual with grotesque horns jutting out of its head and octo pupiled eyes, that was also wearing a monocle, top hat, and three piece suit whilst pure white gloves adorned its hands and was wearing expensive and well polished shoes upon its feet. With a bow the being greeted me.

"Ah, mistress winterfall. I see you have returned from your jaunt about the forest?" I nod at this," Then come along mistress, master Eldren has finished his preparations and wishes to see you post haste," and with that, I followed him into the depths of the cave. With a suddenness the rough rock floor turned into polished marble inscribed with multiple patterns that held no purpose to those but the trained runeist. I continue skipping next to the butler demon as I take in the increasingly intricate and complex runes, I soon come to the apparent end of the cave. "Master Eldren is awaiting you inside, mistress, you'd best hurry up and enjoy the festivities," the butler said with a smile.

"Thanks Jackson!" I say as I leap through the wall, into a massive cavern filled with various mundane and arcane devices and paraphernalia. "Eldren! I'm hoooooom!" I Shout as I giddily run towards a large structure spanning the entire height of the cavern. As I near the door, a glowing red light turns green and the door slides into the ground, revealing a pitch black interior. Skipping in with faux naivety, I enter the interior of the building, acting surprised at lights suddenly turning on and revealing a room completely packed with food and presents and demons wearing party getup's.

"SURPRISE!" The mass of demons yell out as soon as the lights flash on. Amongst them I can see a robed figure with a cheeky smile on his face. "Were you surprised?" The figure asks as it approaches me.

"It was obvious you were throwing me a surprise party, Eldren," I state, causing Eldren to stumble backwards.

"Was it really THAT obvious?" Eldren asks as he recovers from his stumble.

"You acted as though you had forgotten it was my birthday, it was pretty obvious," I point out, earning me murmurs of assent from the crowd of demons.

"Well... What if I had legitimately forgotten your birthday?"

"Then I would've layed waste to the entire forest," I state with a serious look.

"You terrify me, you know that?" He asks as he walks up to me and ruffles my pinkish-purple hair, causing me to scrunch up my face in indignation.

"Hey, don't do that!" I huff, causing him to laugh.

"I can't help it, you just look so ador-" He begins before I cut him off.

"Finish that sentence and I will tickle you into insanity," I growl, causing him to gulp nervously.

"I meant cute," He changes.

"Okay then!" I say with a huge smile. "Let's get to partying!" I shout out before rushing over to the food table and piling a plate with a little bit of everything. "No way! Elven sweet cakes!" I squee, beholding the confectionary perfection before me, barely noticing the red hued hand reaching towards it. "Touch it and I'll do things to you that would make the devil himself cringe." I say to the hands owner, to which it slowly retracted, followed by me placing it on my plate and then grabbing a raspberry and chocolate milkshake and moving over to a nearby table.

"So, how're you enjoying your party?" Eldren asks from behind me.

"I don't know, it's only been three minutes."

"I'll ask again when it's time to open your presents," He says as he backs into the crowd of jolly demons.

Four hours later

I groan as I rub my over inflated belly and behold the mountain of plates in front of me. "Oooooh, I think I ate too much," I burp out.

"I thought you would've remembered what happened last year.

"You mean when the unicorn you got me ate all the Elven Sweetcakes?" I ask.

"I never got you a unicorn. I thought I erased that particular event from time," he mutters to himself. "So, do you feel up to opening your presents?"

"Buuuuh, I'm too full," I reply

"Then I guess I'll just have to open them for you."

"N-no! I can do it myself." I say, springing to my feet and rushing over to the section of the building covered in presents.

"No matter how old they get, the thrill of opening presents never leaves them." A booming, gravelly voice says next to Eldren.

"Yes, it doesn't I just wish she had actual friends to share this with, and not legions of demons." Eldren sighs.

""The others of her kind would reject her for her uniqueness. It has to be this way. Happiness in ignorance, and all that." The colossal demon next to him states.

"I know, Dar'cashul, but I just wish there was another way."

"Indeed, young master, but alas, this world holds no love of her afflictions." Dar'cashul says, flunching when a screech of joy pierces his ears.

"YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! An Infinity blade! How did you know, Druthas?" I say, addressing a nearby imp.

"Hitting me in the head with a hammer with Infinity Blade written on it was a pretty big clue." THe imp deadpanned, preparing for a bone shattering hug, of which he received.

"Thank you! It's so shiny, and sharpy, and omnipotent. I will cherish it always." I say as I move to the next present. With a whirlwind of wrapping paper and string, I tear it open to reveal and elegant dress laden with various gemstones and runic patterns. Upon further examination I can also see a faint shimmer of enchantments and wards. I also take note of a empty socket near the base of the neckline.

"I see you like your present, Amena?" I hear Eldren say from behind me.

I turn around quickly and hug his legs with tears in my eyes. "It's beautiful Eldren, but why is there an empty socket here?" I ask, pointing to the socket.

"I was going to place a Natura stone there, but a gremlin with a tree fetish somehow managed to bypas my protections and steal them all." Eldren states.

"You lost the pocket dimension, didn't you?"

"Yes."

"Well, I did get given a Natura stone by a treant earlier. Would it be okay if I placed it in the socket?

"It's your dress, do whatever you want." He affirms with a nod.

With careful hands, I slowly insert the gem into the socket, a light clicking sound indicating it will stay in place. "I am going to put this on right now!" I yell with glee, getting ready to strip to my undies.

"Hey, hey., hey! What have I told you about undressing in front of others?" Eldren lectures.

"Something about it being acceptable?"

"Yes, it was acceptable four thousand years ago, but we live in the modern age here, and we don't get undressed in front of others."

"But that's stupid!" I whine.

"No buts, missy. Now head up to your room if you want to change into your dress."

"Okay, Eldren." I say dejectedly as I sulk upstairs with the dress in my hands.

"Don't you think that was a little hars?" Dar'cashul asks.

"I know for a fact there are at least eight lust demons in this room, and I'd rather not have to clean bloodstains out of the metalwork again. I am still baffled as to how she managed to stain anti-stain enchanted steel."

"I am also confused as to how she managed to set water on fire as well."

"Wait, she set water on fire!"

"Yes, fifty years ago she tried her hand at cooking, she tried to measure a cup of water for the recipe, and it appeared to have spontaneously combusted."

"I... See."

"And that was how I lost my third arm."

"You had three arms?"

"Yes, then I laughed at her failure and she tore it off and slapped me in the face with it before storming off."

"That just makes me more worried."

"Indeed, and here comes the birthday girl in her new dress." Dar'cashul says, turning to look at the stairs as I descend them in my new dress. It was truly a thing of beauty, with flowing patterns of blue and pink forming ever shifting shapes and patterns, gems studded at various points, adding to the already intricate patterns already existing, following those was a series of constantly shifting, nigh invisible, rune arrays covering the entire dress, completed by a light purpleish-gold glow and an untold number of wards. On my back is a purple and gold scabbard containing the infinity blade and a series of pouches slung around my waist of a silver belt with a diamond buckle shaped like a blooming flower.

"You, look amazing." Eldren thinks aloud.

"Y-you think?" I squeak.

"Oh! Uh-I uh, I mean, that dress suits you!" Eldren stutters as he realises his folly.

"Methinks the young master is a little tongue tied, eh?" A chrome green, winged demon says, winking at and nudging the demon next to him.

"Please stop with your innuendos, they were only funny for the first century I knew you." The demon he nudged says with a tone of defeat.

"Well excuse me. It's not my fault I'm a demon of propagation."

"You could at least act civilised." The other demon growls.

"I am civilised, otherwise mistress Amena would've said something." The green demon snorted indignantly.

"Well, it's getting late, you'd best get to bed, Amena."

"But I don't need sleep." I complain.

"You still have to, otherwise I won't give you any of that cereal you love tomorrow morning."

"Bu-but, it's so tasty! Fine. I'll go to bed." I grump as I once again ascend the staircase to my room. As I'm halfway up the stairs, a blaring alarm sounds of as bright red light begin swirling around the room.

"Oh shit, we're under attack. Battle stations everyone!" Eldren yells out over the abonoxious alarms and panicking demons. "Amena, head to your room, it's safe there, I don't want you to have to field test your new dress tonight." Eldren states, pointing in the direction of my room.

"Okay." I say as I skip to my room, my mood greatly improved. Upon entering my room, I bound over to my drawers and grab a purple holster with a golden trim and clip it onto my belt. After doing that, I run towards a nearby wall and press various locations in a sequence, eliciting a hiss as it slowly fades out of exisence. Quickly inputting a code into the safe the disappearing wall reveled, I open the door and stare at the objects within: A large gold plated pistol with various arcane inscriptions and several rubies along the sides of the barrel. I quickly grab the gun and, checking the safety is on, place it in the holster, which I then strap shut and reach in for the next item, a pair of pink gloves with a rune array made of emeralds on them. Slipping them on, I acquire the third and final occupant of the safe. My trusty bag of holding, which I attach to the back of my belt, neatly snuggling into the small of my back.

Nodding in preparedness, I open my door to behold a hulking monstrosity of man and machine staring at me with cold, blue eyes. I quickly slam the door shut and brace myself against it as I begin hyperventilating. It isn't long before the thing on the otherside of my door begins trying to futilely break its way in. Thinking quickly, I draw my sword and open the door whilst simultaneously stepping between it and the wall. Startled, the creature stumbles through the now open door and starts scanning the room for me. Utilising and unheard of level of grace and martial prowess, I leap out from behind the door and pivot on my left leg whilst brining the right up up to impact its waist, knocking it into the far wall of my room. I sprint towards the stunned monster and leap into the air. Upon nearing the just recovering monster, I spin mid-air and thrust forwards, into the monsters metallic chest, causing an inhuman scream to bellow forth as it slowly died.

With a grunt, I pull my sword out of its chest and swipe it through the air to clean it of the creatures life fluids, before sheathing it and continuing out of my room. With a look in both directions, I discern no visible hostiles and begin trekking towards the stairs whilst sitting close to the wall and silencing my footfalls. As I reach the stairs, I pear around the corner and witness several demons battling against a dozen or so creatures like the one I slay in my room. With a shout of challenge, I leap from the top of the stairs, draw my sword, and crash onto one of the creatures chests, impaling it with my sword, before back flipping off and in front of the group of demons.

"Mistress! You were instructed to stay within your quarters!" One of the demons fretted.

"And miss out on all the fun?" I say with a quirk of my head." I think not!" I shout as I twirl around and lop off the arm of a charging creature, before delivering a swift kick to its torso and sending it flying through the wall behind it. This act prompted several more to charge me at once. I yawn at their attack and proceed to counter their charge with my own. With a yell of glee, I slash upwards with my blade, cutting through the closest abominations chest and killing it instanly, followed by bringing the blade down on the head of another, slicing it in half at an angle, before finishing up with a spin and a slash at the third ones waist, cutting it deeply. Flashing the demons a joy filled smile, I charged forward to face the remaining abominations with gusto. The look of utter certainty in my eyes must've caused these things to falter as they were slow to react to my flurry of strikes. After a full twelve seconds, I finished my whirlwind of strikes to reveal over a dozen pureed corpses.

With a nod of approval at my work, I exit the now blood and oil soaked room, leaving several demons in maid outfits to weep at the mess they would have to clean up. Outside, I spot Eldren battling a giant mechanical snake alongside all the greater demons under his command. I lick my lips as I begin to waltz over to my next target, a massive spider-like robot chasing after a horde of imps. Bounding towards the automaton with my blade drawn, I notice Eldren getting struck by the tail of the giant snakenoid. Knowing he can take care of himself, I put on a burst of speed and catch up with the sipderbot, slashing one of its legs from under it. Continuing on with my momentum, I slash the leg directly opposite the one I just destroyed. With a strong leap, I pierce the underbelly of the spider with my sword and latch onto it with one of my gloves as I begin wildly slashing about at the underbelly, causing a large hole to form, which I scramble into. Inside this mechanical beast, I see three uniformed people sitting in fronr of a series of control panels. Walking towards them innocently, I call out.

"Hey, what's this thing?" I ask nonchalantly, causing the crew to jump slightly in surprise.

"How'd you get in here!" One of them exclaims whilst pointing at me.

"Little girl, this is no place for one such as yourself, how about you sit over there whilst we radio command about how to deal with you?" A distinctly feminine sounding voice asks.

"But you're hurting my friends." I say, pointing at the image of the group of imps they were chasing.

"Oh. OH! You're the little girl we were sent to capture." One of the crew says aloud, causing the other two to facepalm.

"Great going, private, now she knows."

"Actually, I don't care." I smile sweetly.

"You don't?" One of the crew asks inquisitively.

"Of course! I was still going to kill you either way." I say with a large smile, causing the crew to falter slightly. I then conjure a large fireball with a flick of my wrist and throw it at the group of people in front of me, destroying the front section of the machine. Hopping out of the machine, I feel myself being suddenly grabbed by a tentacle like appendage and being hoisted into the air.

"We've got her! Fall back everyone, mission accomplished!" I hear a tinny voice call out. Upon hearing this, Eldren panics and fires of a random spell at the thing holding me. The next thing I know, I'm surrounded by a torrent of rainbow hued energy and in the most intense agony imaginable.

I awoke to an immense headache and pains all over my body.Groaning in anguish, I slowly open my eyes to behold a weird amalgamation of eagle and lion. Moaning at the effort of opening my eyes, I swiftly fall unconscious.

Perspective change, two thousand years later.

The trio of white coated griffons stride down the corridor purposefully down a white tiled hallway towards a set of glass doors. Upon reaching them, the center griffon pushes them open without breaking stride and stops in front of a large bipedal purple being with a horn and wings, adorned by a crown and a magnificent purple dress. Bowing slightly to the figure, the lead scientist clears his throat. "Princess Twilight Sparkle, we were not informed that you would be arriving today," He says.

"I decided to make a surprise visit to the only Griffon controlled research center inside Equestria. I have come to do a full review of this sites discoveries, but the gentlepony at the front desk claims that I do not have clearance to enter the facility. Why is that?" Princess Twilight asks grumpily.

"This facility was designed to study a unique phenomena only safe to be handled by griffons. This is not racial discrimination, it is merely for your protection." A female griffon scientist says.

"And why do you have exclusive rights to it, hmm?"

"Well, we, uh... That is-" The lead scientist starts before the third scientist speaks up.

"It is because we are hoping to neutralise its harmful effects so it can be used as a source of infinite, renewable energy." The third griffon says.

"I see, and why haven't the Solar Diarchs been informed of this?"

"Because they would no doubt try and have it destroyed. Denying the world clean energy for many more generations."

"I have been informed that this site is two thousand years old, why haven't there been any significant break throughs in that time?"

"We only just attained the mathematical equations required to measure and predict the phemonemas energy fluctuations."

"Very well then, I shall return in three months, and if there haven't been any significant break throughs in that time, I'm shutting this place down by order of the Solar Diarchs."

"Very well then, we won't keep you from your duties much longer." The lead scientist says with a bow, mere moments before lights began flashing and klaxons began blaring.

"WARNING: Containment breached, subject is loose. Use of anti-tank and armor piercing missiles has been approved. Do not approach the subject unless suitably armed and armored. This message repeats." A monotone male voice called out through the entire facility.

'Just what kind of phenomena requires anti-tank rifles to bring down?!" Princess Twilight shouts, as she's rushed towards the exit.

"The kind that offers unlimited reward." A griffon shouts as he pushes her out the doors.

Huffing in annoyance, Twilight starts walking towards her chariot, nearly falling over when a massive tremor shakes the facility. Deciding to not stick around to encounter what caused the tremor, she quickly hurries towards her chariot and boards it. Instructing the pegasi guards pulling it to take her back to Canterlot so she can file her report and get back to teaching at Celestia's School for the Gifted. So caught up in her thoughts was she, that she almost didn't notice a large section of the facility exploding outwards as the front of the mountain it was built into begins to collapse from an immense force striking it. Almost falling out of her seat, she informs her guards to pick up the pace to get ahead of flying debris.

Five hours later, Canterlot

"-And as you can see, the facility was torn apart by an unknown force whilst I was returning to the castle. I can only imagine the experiments the griffons were preforming there. That concludes my report of Sparrow Technologies Equestria facility, Celestia." Twilight finishes.

"I, see. And you did not try to gain further access to the facility to verify these claims?" Princess Luna asks.

"As I stated in my report, I was ushered out of the facility before I could proceed any further. And before you ask, I was not going to try and force my way inside the facility, lest it turned out they were, in fact, packing military grade weaponry on the site. But, due to the facilities total annihilation, we'll never know" Twilight replies.

"The presence of a phenomena capable of destroying a large facility without assistance is very troubling indeed." Celestia says, humming in thought. "Very well Twilight, your task is complete and you may once again return to your teachings at my school. May your days be ever bright-" Celestia begins.

"-And your nights ever calm." Luna finishes.

"Thank you, Luna, Celestia, I'll take my leave now." Twilight says with a bow before turning and heading out of the room.As she enters the hallway outside the throne room, she is suddenly tackled by a waist high ball of excitement.

"Yay, you're back, Twilight!" The ball of excitement exclaims, earning it a chuckle.

"I knew you'd do something like this, Spike" Twilight says whilst rustling the little dragons hair.

"So, when do I start school, huh?" The excitable dragon asks.

"Tomorrow, in the mean time, I'm starving, and I know of the perfect little restaurant to sate my hunger at." She says as her stomach grumbles, causing her to blush.

"Okay." Spike says as follows Twilight down the hall, where they encounter a white unicorn with a marvelous purple mane.

"Hello, darlings. How was your trip, Twilight?" The unicorn asks.

"It was going well, Rarity, until the mountain blew up." Twilight replies with a look of disapointment.

"WHAT?!" Rarity yells.

"Rarity, don't. I was nowhere near the mountain when it exploded, though all those poor griffons probably weren't so lucky." Twilight says with a look of regret.

"Oh, I'm sorry darling. Come along, let's get you something to eat, then I'll have to return to Ponyville to get Sweetie Belle."

"Why're you getting Sweetie Belle from Ponyville?" Spike asks suspiciously.

"Oh, nothing much, I just got her accepted into Celestia's School for the Gifted."

"Wow, that's where Twilight's sending me!" Spike says gleefully.

"Oh, they got the petition to allow non-Equestrians to go to school in the country passed, did they?" Rarity asks.

"Yeah, now I can be taught by somepony other than Twilight! Er, no offense Twilight." Spike sheepishly finishes.

"Oh no, it'll be good for you to get to meet new ponies." Twilight responds nonchalantly.

"Alright then, darlings, how about we head off for a bite to eat before I return to Ponyville?"

"Sure."

"Alright!"

Ponyville, literally just now

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Scoots?" Applebloom asks, warily eyeing the forest they are nearing.

"Don't worry, nothing bad will happen. We'll just get in, grab the herbs, and get out. Nothing else. That okay with you, Sweetie?" Scootaloo asks whilst propelling her scooter forwards.

"That sounds rather tame for you Scootaloo." Sweetie Belle replies dubiously.

"I've learnt my lesson." Scootaloo harrumphs.

"Yeah, afta' about the thirty seventh time." Applebloom snickers, causing Scootaloo to groan.

"Don't worry, Scootaloo. At least you can recognise when you've made a mistake... Eventually." Sweetie placates.

"Thanks, Sweetie." Scootaloo says. "So, what were the herbs we were looking for again?"

"Everfree blossoms an' night roses." Applebloom says whilst reading from a book on alchemy.

"Got it, they should be right her- OH MY GODDESS! What the hay is that?!" Scootaloo suddenly screams as she slams on the brakes.

"Ow. What was that for, Scoots?" Applebloom asks, rubbing her head from where it impacted the wagon she is sitting in.

"Look." Scootaloo says, pointing at a prone form laying near some bushes.

"Whoa. Think we should bring it back with us?" Applebloom asks.

"W-what if it's dangerous?" Sweetie Belle gulps.

"Well we cain't leave it layin' in the Everfree, now can we?"

"I-I guess we can't. Okay, help me get it in the wagon then." Sweetie says, hopping out of the wagon and trudging over to the prone form.

"Sure." Applebloom says as she hops out as well and walks over to help Sweetie Belle carry the figure into the wagon. Grabbing onto the figures legs, the pair lift it up and carry it over to the wagon.

"So, do you think we should take it to a hospital?" Scootaloo asks, with a strange wisdom.

"Yeah, that'd be wise." Applebloom agrees. The trio then set off towards the hospital with their unexpected find in tow.

Author's Note

Wellity, wellity, well. Looks like I've made another story, is it good? Is it bad? Well, that's for you to decide. I leave you with this question: Why?

I will now bugger off to play some Minecraft, chaio.

Hospital Shenanigins.

I awoke to a blinding headache and an aching stomach. Looking around me blearily, I take notice of a series of strange machines hooked up to me with wires. Attempting to move, I groan in agony as my headache soars to new heights of pain. At the sound of movement, I rotate my head so I'm looking in the general direction of the noise and detect the presence of delicious innocence. I feel something poking me and saying something incomprehensible. It takes me a while to work my way out of my stupor, regaining my sight as a weird creature walks through a door set across from my prone form.

"Ah, well hello there, miss dofu. I see you're feeling better?" The creature asks, too which I nod. "Good, now then, I'd like you to sign these forms in the absence of a responsible parent or guardian." It asks, handing me a sheaf of paper. "I'll be back in an hour to collect the forms. In the meantime, I'll tell the three fillies who found you you're awake." It says as it exits the room and closes the door behind it. I stare the the forms quizzically as I read the contents of the first page.

Name:
Gender:
Age:
Dofu Ability
Home Address:
Parent or Legal Guardian:

Looking at them for a while longer, I casually incinerate them by channeling fire into my hands, causing them to catch alight almost instantly. Soon after the sound of three excitable voices echoes through the door, heralding the approach of a group of younglings, supposed the "fillies" that had found me. Soon after the voices reach my ears the door explodes open and three smaller versions of the creature from before, only clearly feminine and of a different colour scheme.

"So... You're awake?" A creme coloured one with red hair and a bright red bow in her hair. I nod in response. "Uh, cain ya talk?" I nod again. "Are ya gonna talk?" I shrug.

"Ugh! This is getting us nowhere, guys. Let me talk to her." A brash sounding, orange coloured one with dark purple hairs says. "Alright, who are you, what are you, and are you a spy!" It shouts, causing me to send it a withering glare. Shrinking back, the creature grabs a white one next to it with a two toned hairstyle and a horn on its head. "Here, talk to Sweetie Belle!" The orange one says, backing away quickly.

"Why do I have to talk to it?!" The white one says, it's voice cracking horrendusly.

"You said we should bring it back with us." The orange one retorts.

"But YOU spooted it, Scootaloo." Sweetie Belle accuses, butting heads with Scootaloo, getting into a loud argument.

"Just ignore those two. So, how'd you wind up in the Everfree?" The creme coloured one asks. I shrug. "Not very talkative, are ya?" I shrug. "Well, do ya have anywhere to stay tonight?" I shake my head. "Well, as long as my big sis okays it, you cain stay at mah place. Ma name's Applebloom, what's yours?" The creme coloured one asks, holding a hand out towards me.

"I'm Amena Winterfall." I croak, my dehydrated throat made clear.

"Ah'll get ya some water, hopefully those two over there will stop arguing soon." Applebloom says as she walks towards the door. I look at one of the strange machines, it has a screen on it and is emitting a steady droning beep whilst displaying a green line. I carefully trace a wire coming out of it to a weird clip on my finger, which I remove immediately. I then set to work finding what each cable goes to and removing them upon confirming nothing bad could be caused by the act. After several minutes, Applebloom walks through the door carrying a glass of water. She pauses and looks at me and then at all the unplugged machines with worry.

"Ah think ya'll mighta been meant to keep those hooked up to ya." She says as she hands me the water, which I scull in one go. "Ya'll were thirsty, weren't ya?"

"Yes, very much so." I reply, evidently surprising her with the soft melody of my voice.

"Wow, you've got a pretty voice." She says with a look of awe.

"How do you mean such? I have a comparatively average voice, miss Applebloom." I respond.

"Ya'll cain just call me Applebloom, save the miss for ma big sis. So, where're you from?"

"Valdrite."

"Never heard of it, where is it?"

"Not this world, too bright and sunny here. No eternal overcast and highly toxic pockets of air." I deduce.

"How cain ya'll survive in such a place?!" She asks worriedly.

"With ease, afte rall, once you get past the fact that nine out of ten individuals you meet will either try and eat you or rape, and sometimes both, though not necessarily in that order, it's a rather nice place." I explain, earning me looks of horror from the trio.

"That sounds horrible. Ah'm glad ya wound up in the Everfree Forest now, that place must'a been worse'n Tartarus." Applebloom says.

"But in Valdrite, I have Eldren." I say, causing her to cringe.

"Is Eldren yer big brother or something?"

"He took to looking after me when he found me wandering around in a forest completely naked."

"Well... You're sorta naked now, hospital gowns sorta have an open back, and you don't get to wear clothes under them." Sweetie Belle says sheepishly.

"And the point you are trying to make is?" I ask.

"That, you're naked... in front of three other ponies." She says, a blush slowly making itself apparent on her face.

"I see, and would you know where my clothes are?"

"Yeah, the hospital took them to be washed." Scootaloo says.

"Very well, and where is this hospitals washing room?"

"In the basement. Why'd you ask?" Scootaloo asks.

"I shall navigate my way to this basement and retrieve my clothes, I shall return at a later time period." I say, getting off of the raised bed I was resting on, revealing that I was wearing a drab gray gown with sickly green polka dots.

"B-but you shouldn't go out by yourself, you might have been injured!" Sweetie Beller says, trying to hid her blush.

"I have no injuries, and this gown is an front to those who would prefer to be dressed brightly, and thus must be destroyed." I say, as I begin taking off the gown, only to be tackled to the ground by the three.

"Don't get naked in front of others! It's indecent." Applebloom scolds.

"How is it indecent, and what is 'indecent'?" I ask, causing the three to stare at me dumbfounded.

"H-how can you have no concept of decency!" Scootaloo shouts. "Decency is acting with a modicum of.. uh. GRAH! I don't know, that's something an egghead like Twilight would know, not me." She says, throwing her arms up in surrender.

"Then I see no problem to walking around naked." I say, heading out the door, minus one offense to cheeriness and fashion, leaving three confused and creeped out ponies behind.

"Hey, wait!" They all shout, chasing after me.

"I shall find my clothes and dress in a proper way." I say, dodging their attempts to tackle me with contemptuous ease.

"Gah, how is she so agile!" Applebloom growls as I once again dodge her tackle.

"I am a trained master swordsman and have ample tutelage in the arts of acrobatics." I say, jumping as Sweeite belle and Scootallo try a two pronged tackle, scraping the roof with my head.

"How the tartarus can she jump so high." Scootaloo asks, watching me land gracefully from jumping six feet in the air.

"Ah have no idea, but we've got to stop her before somepony sees her." Sweetie Belle replies, recovering first and running after my naked form.

"Got it!" Applebloom and Scootaloo yell as they get up and resume chasing after me, rounding a corner to see me standing on Sweetie Belles stooped over buttock and looking at a map on the wall. "Sweetie! How'd this happen?"

"There was a puddle of water on the ground and I slipped. Amena decided to use me as a stepping stool." Sweetie Belle groans.

"Quiet, peon, I am studying a map."

"Could you at least at some clothes on?" Sweeite Belle begs.

"As soon as I locate mine. I have plotted a route to the washing room, and shall now reclaim my clothes." I say as I step off Sweetie Belle and walk off on my pre-determined route, only to round a corner and smack into a pair of legs.

"What in the name of celestia are you walking around naked for?!" The owner of the legs says, jumping back in fright.

"The gown that I was given by the nurses here was abhorrent and unseemly. So I threw it away and am now journeying to claim my clothes from the washing room." I explain, trying to sidestep around the person in front of me.

"Don't know know it's illegal to walk around naked?"

"They could not stop me even if they tried." I state.

"Well aren't we full of ourselves." The owner of the legs says, hoisting me up by my shoulders. "Come on, you little weirdo, let's get you some clothes." The being says just as Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Applebloom round the corner.

"Rainbow Dash! *Squee* What're you doing here?" Scootaloo asks giddily.

"I got sentenced to community service after I crashed into, and destroyed, one of the town halls walls." Rainbow says, rubbing her head sheepishly.

"Oh, uh... is Amena in trouble?" Applebloom asks from next to a dumbfounded Scootaloo.

"Nah, as long as no pony else sees her before we get her her clothes, everything'll be alright. At least until I tell her mother about her behaviour." Rainbow Dash says, causing the fillies to gasp.

"My mother and father are dead." I say.

"Aaaaaaaaand now I tell like a dick." Rainbow Dash says, groaning.

"What's a 'dick'?" Sweetie Belle asks.

"Uhh... Nothing you need to concern yourselves with until you're over sixteen! Kthanksbye!" Rainbow Dash says, quickly jetting away with me tucked under her arm.

"Great job, miss Rainbow Dash, swearing in front of three minors." I snark.

"Don't'cha mean four?" She asks.

"Do not change the subject, miss Rainbow Dash."

"Fine, and call me Rainbow or Dash, calling me miss makes me feel old."

"Very well then, Rainbow. So, are we going to acquire my clothes, or hover three feet off the ground in a large hallway?" I ask, causing Rainbow to blush and race off down a series of stairs and hallways until we reached the washing room.

"Alright, now then, what do your clothes look like?" She asks me, which I ignore and instead walk over to a pile of neatly folded clothes, which I throw to the side carelessly, earning me a shout of warning. But I do not care, for I have revealed my clothes, and reach for them, just as a nurse enters the room and just stares at me, occasionally looking at Rainbow.

"This isn't what it looks like!" Rainbow yells, blushing furiously.

"But it is exactly what it looks like. You brought me to where my clothes are, and I am about to put them on." I say, causing the nurse and Rainbow to stare at me.

"Soooooo, this mare isn't trying to molest you?" The mare asks, causing Rainbow to shout at her and take a menacing step forwards.

"No, and if she was, I would merely implode her thoracic cavity." I say, pulling on my clothes at an impossible speed. "Now then, where are my belt, pouches, bag of holding, sword, and pistol?" I direct towards the nurse, who looks conflicted. She is jut about to speak until she is interrupted by Rainbow.

"What sort of pony gives their dofu a pistol and a sword?!" She screeches.

"I know not what this 'dofu' is, but I made the pistol myself, and the sword is a gift I received on my birthday." I say whilst staring into Rainbows very soul.

"U-u-uh o-okay then." She stutters, overcome by a feeling of scrutiny. "So, nurse Stoneheart, do you know where her 'things' are?" Rainbow asks the nurse.

"They were confiscated by the guard. They should be at the royal guard garrison on the other side of town. Though I don't think they'll release them to her. They said something about them all being incredibly powerful thaumic artifacts or something. And that they were going to be sent to Princess Twilight to be studied." Nurse Stoneheart replies.

"Then I shall go to this royal guard garrison and retrieve my belongings." I say, walking towards the exit, only to find myself barred by Nurse Stoneheart.

"I'm afraid I can't let you do that, you haven't been properly discharged yet. We don't even have any paper work about you."

"Move, or I will move you." I threaten, causing an aura of menace to descend upon the room.

"N-no!" She defiantly states. I grunt in exasperation, before grabbing her thighs and picking her up. I then take two steps to the left and deposit her on the floor before exiting through the door, leaving behind a confused nurse and an awed pony. After navigating my way through the labyrinthine hospital hallways, I finally arrive at the front exit, only to be blocked by three ponies in golden armor, and the doctor from earlier.

"I'm sorry miss, but it appears that you've been placed under arrest- and how did you get behind me?!" He suddenly shouts as I appear behind him.

"I walked." I say as I continue walking outside, leaving the guards to stare confusedly before coming to their senses a few seconds later, and charging after me, right as Rainbow and nurse Stoneheart enter the lobby, to see me getting chased by the guards.

"After them!" Rainbow yells as she flies past the doctor, quickly followed by a panicking nurse.

"What. What just happened?" The doctor asks, looking around at the other ponies in the room, receiving shrugs in response.

I arrive at a rather large, ornate looking building with two golden clad ponies standing guard in front of it, having lost my pursuers the moment I had left the hospital. Walking towards the door, I suddenly find my path blocked by two spears. I turn to look at the left guard, who has a stoic expression, I turn to face the right guard, meeting the same stoic face as the left. Experimenting, I take a step backwards and the guards retract the spears. Taking a step forwards, they bar the door with them again. Growing frustrated, I voice my annoyance.

"Why will you not allow me entrance to this building?" I demand.

"Authorised personnel only past this point, miss. Unless you are either escorted by a royal guard, or have a pass we cannot permit you access to-where'd she go?" The guard asks, looking around the open plaza for me. "Okay, seriously, the tartarus did she go?" He asks, turning around to see the door slightly ajar. "How. The. Buck did she do that?" The guard says, staring slack jawed at the ajar door.

"I'm not sure, Gilded Hoof, but we should report this to the commander." The second guard replies.

"You're right, Iron Shod." GIlded Hoof says, turning towards a phone located in a small indentation behind him, he picks it up and speaks into the receiver. "We have an intruder in the garrison, be wary, she is incredibly slippery and can bypass you if given the slightest of distractions." He speaks into the phone, receiving an affirmative in response before hanging it up. Returning to his post, his eyes go wide as three other guards, a nurse, a cyan mare, and a doctor come barreling towards him. "Halt, this is a restricted area and-" Is all he can say as he is shoved out of the way by the charging horde who proceed to storm into the building. "Buck it, I'm taking my break." The recently bowled over guard states, getting up and walking towards a nearby cafe.

Now inside the building, I scan the area for any maps or signs that will lead me to my belongings. Spotting a wandering guard, I walk towards them and hail them with a raised hand. "Excuse me, mister guard sir, but could you point me to where you take confiscated items?"

"Why?" He questions.

"Some of my belonging have been mistakenly been taken there, and I am here to retrieve them." I say, pouting slightly.

"Well, I suppose I can help you get your things back, after all they were taken by mistake, right?" I nod, throwing in the puppy eyes for extra measure. "Alright, follow me then." He gestures me to follow him, which I do. After a minute or two of wandering, we arrive outside a room with a sign saying confiscated goods on it. "Right, your things should be in here." He says, unlocking the door and stepping in.

"Thank you mister." I say politely as I enter after him. Scanning the room, I instantly spot my belongings, which I merrily skip towards, oblivious of the ruckus slowly getting closer to my location. Clipping the belt around my waist, I check the contents of all my pouches, finding them all to be undisturbed. I then reach for my pistol and holster, placing them in their spot on my belt. I then place my bag of holding behind my back, once again resting in the small of my back, and I then finally reach towards my sword, just as three guards, a nurse, a doctor, and a cyan mare burst into the room. Stopping mid-grab, both I and the guard stare perplexedly at the group of six trying to get through the door first. With a shrug, I grab my sword, sheathe and all, and place it on my back, thus completing my assemble. As I finish acquiring my things, Rainbow finally makes it through the door.

"Alright, you little scamp, how the hay did you manage to get in here?" She demands causing the guard next to me to clear his throat.

"Actually, I assisted her, she told me that some of her belongings had been taken here by mistake, and asked me if I could take her to where we store confiscated items. Also, how can you say no to that face?" He says, gesturing to me pouting and pulling puppy eyes.

"... I guess you can't." Rainbow says, giving in after a few seconds of inner turmoil. "But still, she shouldn't have come here alone, what if somepony tried to foalnap you, hmm?"

"I can protect myself." I retort.

"There's some ponies out there who use less-than-scrupulous means of foalnapping ponies." The guard pipes up.

"If I can out riddle a riddlebeast, I doubt that a pony could hold a candle at the chance of capturing I." I say, manouvering past all present and into the halls, only to be met with a wall of spears on all sides.

"Stop right there, criminal scum!" A guard shouts at me, causing me to flinch in surprise. "You are hereby underarrest for breaching a secure zone of her majesty, princess Celestia's royal guard. How plead you?" The guard bellows.

"Uh, wasn't the Ponyville garrison restriction removed due to the frequent monster attacks and disasters happening in recent years?" Asks the guard who escorted me to the room my belongings were in.

"Oh... Well, uh, you're still under arrest for making all look like foals!"

"That law was abolished fifty years ago." Another guard pipes up.

"Oh for bucksake, then what CAN we charge her with?"

"Indecent exposure?" The nurse suggests.

"R-right! You're under arrest for indecent exposure! How plead you?"

"I was getting changed in a secluded room with someone on look out, that was due to circumstance." I reply, shooting the guard down.

"Fine. You're free to go. Have a nice day, civilian." The guard grumbles as he and his fellows retreat from the hallway.

"Alright, kid, you're coming with me to find the Cutie Mark Crusaders." Rainbow says, hoisting me over her shoulder and carrying me out of the building.

At the hospital the CMC were waiting patiently inside the lobby whilst they were told off by Applejack and Rarity. "Darlings, what have we said about bringing home strange creatures you find in the Everfree?" Rarity asks scoldingly.

"But we didn't bring it home, Rarity, we brought it to the hospital." Sweetie Belle chirps.

"That doesn't change the fact that you brought a potentially dangerous animal into Ponyville!" Rarity disapprovingly chastises.

"Actually, I believe it was a dofu they brought along." A slightly sophisticated sounding voice calls out.

"Oh, Aberrant, shouldn't you be minding the Library?" Rarity asks.

"It's after closing, so I thought I might as well check in on favourite, slash only, friends in town." He says as he steps towards the trio. "So, what does this dofu you found look like?" He asks excitedly.

"Well, she had purple-ish pink hair, was wearing a dress that would make Rarity faint, and was around four feet tall. Why'd you ask?" Scootaloo says, earning her a snort from Rarity.

"Because, I'd like to meet her. Finally, I'll have one of my own kind to talk to, other than Spike!" He cheers, missing the doors opening and Rainbow walking in.

"What's Aberrant so excited about?" She asks.

"Oh, he found out that the girls brought a dofu from the Everfree to the hospital." Rarity explains, earning a chuckle from Rainbow.

"Funny you should mention her." Rainbow says, unceremoniously depositing me on the floor. "Look who I finally caught up to in the royal guard garrison."

"My word?! What an exquisite dress, whomever did you get to make it for you?" Rarity starts fawning as she notices my dress.

"Eldren made it for me for my birthday." I chime happily, though a little miffed at being manhandled.

"Hi." Aberrant says, suavely sliding in front of me. "I'm Aberrant, what's yours?" He asks.

"I am Amena Winterfall." I introduce myself, brushing him off completely.

"Hey, your dress looks nice, Amena." Sweetie Belle says.

"Thank you."

"So, tell me darling, what fabric is your dress made of?" Rarity asks, getting uncomfortably close.

"I think it is made of elf spun Litherice Spider silk." I uncomfortably respond, attempting to back away from the creepy pony in front of me.

"Interesting, I've never heard of such a material, where would I get some?"

"First, you have to summon a Lithice Spider from the Blood Realm, and then you have to harvest it for its silk, and then you need to find an elven tailor versed in silk spinning."

"Wait, what's the Blood Realm?" Rarity asked me strangely.

"The realm where all demons reside whilst they await a master who will summon them."

"Oh, can any pony summon a Lithice Spider?"

"I have no idea." I claim, playing the innocence card.

"Oh well, I'm sure Twilight can tell me if I can summon one or not. But where to find one of these 'elfs'." She mutters to herself whilst tapping her lips in thought.

"Rrrrright, anywho, what were you girls thinkin', goin' inta tha Everfree?" Applejack says, picking up while Rarity distracts herself.

"We were getting some ingredients for a potion to make our capes indestructable." Sweetie Belle says, pouting.

"That ain't gonna work on me. But if ya'll were going to try and make yer capes indestructable, why didn't ya'll git an adult to help you collect the ingredients?" Applejack questions.

"You were busy on the farm and Rarity was in Canterlot."

"What about me?" Rainbow butts in. Everyone present gives her a dead pan stare.

"No offense, RD, but ya'll ain't exactly the greatest influence on the youngin's."

"Fffffine, I guess I'll go do something else."

"Are you not forgetting about me?" I pipe up, causing all present to jump in surprise.

"How in tarnations did we forget about her?"

"I have no idea, darling, but if I could just get a sample o the fabric her dress is made of..." Rarity trails off, getting a predatory look in her eye.

"No pesterin' the recently hospitalised dofu, Rarity." Applejack scolds.

"What is a dofu?" I ask.

"Poor thang doesn't even know what she is." Applejack titters.

"Actually, I know fu-" I say, only to be cut off by Rainbow.

"Whoever caused her to not know what she is, is totally unawesome."

"Agreed, darling."

"So, does anypony know where she's going to be staying tonight?" Rainbow asks suddenly.

"Well, I guess I could bring her with me and Aberrant to Canterlot to meet Twilight, perhaps she can shed some light on the poor dears situation." Rarity offers.

"Yea, that sounds like a good idea, after all no pony knows more about dofus than Twilight!" Rainbow agrees, petting me on the head.

'Must not kill them all. Must not kill them all.' I repeat in my head, resisting the urge to unleash a torrent of magical energy to wipe the hospital out of existence.

"Hmm, the poor dear must be really troubled. Come along then, let's make haste to the train station, can't be late for you two's first day at a new school, after all." Rarity says, directing the last part towards Aberrant and Sweetie Belle.

"Okay." The duo cheers happily, dragging me along behind them.

Author's Note

So, I guess short chapters isn't my strong suit.

Scholastic Boredom - Part One

Upon arriving at the train station, I take notice of our mode of locomotion. Looking at the gaudy and unconventionally shaped train, I mentally jot down several improvements of the trains overall function immediately. Looking along the train, I recognizing a recurring theme. Scrunching my face up in disgust and poking my tongue, I tap on Rarity's leg. "Miss Rarity, why does this method of locomotion look like someone has thrown it into a pile of pink and heart shapes?"

"Oh, I don't know, darling. But I suspect it was because it looks marvelous." Rarity answers.

"It looks hideous."

"To each her own, I suppose."

"Come to think of it, the train DOES look a little... Tacky." Aberrant pipes up.

"Remind me why you're coming along again?"

"Because it's illegal to leave a minor unsupervised at a place of residence?"

"Very well."

"Also because I've been enrolled into the most prestigious school on the planet." Aberrant continues.

"I can think of seventeen." I say to no one in particular.

"Quiet, it's time to board." Rarity announces, ushering us towards the train.

"I am hungry, miss Rarity, when can I get some sustenance?" I ask, clutching my rumbling stomach.

"I'm sure there's a meal cart on the train. And I must say, you speak incredibly proper for one so young."

"My parents raised me right." I respond, with a thinly veiled insult.

"Then they must have been wonderful parents." Rarity says as she pushes me onto the train and follows behind me.

Looking around the interior of the train, I feel as though I will lose my lunch, if I had had any earlier today. Following after Rarity, Aberrant, and Sweetie Belle, I come to the cabin where we will be staying for the duration of the trip. Hopping up onto one of the seats, I look out the window, spying a large, ominous looking forest. Shrugging, I continue to look around the cabin, I see Sweetie Belle and Aberrant sitting on either side of Rarity, as she looks into a compact mirror and applies some eye shadow. A grumble in my stomach reminds me of my growing hunger, and I would rather not have to explain she bodies to the conductors at the next station, so I decide to ask Rarity for some food. "Miss Rarity, you said that there would be a meal cart on the train?"

"Yes I did, darling. What would you like me to get for you?" Rarity asks.

"I have no idea what they serve, so a menu."

"Hoho, that would be a good idea. Very well, I'll go retrieve four menus so we can have a lovely meal on our way to Canterlot." She says, standing up and exiting the room to gather some menus.

"So, do you know what a dofu is?" Aberrant asks once Rarity is presumably out of earshot.

"No, I do not know what a 'dofu' is. Who do you ask?"

"Oh, well, a dofu is the name of magically hatched dragons. The magic causes a split in the embryo in the egg and both an Eliatrope and a dragon are hatched. Though it doesn't happen often, as you've probably noticed most ponies have called you a dofu instead of an eliatrope." Aberrant elaborates.

"I am not an Eliatrope." I respond, causing him to recoil in shock.

"Of course you are. You look exactly like one!"

"I am not."

"I'll prove it." He says, lunging towards me and parting my hair with his hands. "W-what?! Where are your wings?" He balks, hopping back into his seat in horror.

"I have no wings."

"Bu-bu-bu-but how?" He mutters, lost in his own train of thought, which Sweetie Belle uses to her advantage as she speaks up.

"So, if you're not an eliatrope, what are you?"

"I am a human."

"A human? Never heard of them." She says.

"That is because I am likely not of this world."

"Wow! Does that mean you're an alien?" She asks excitedly.

"Possibly. Though I could be here due to a thaumic spacial dissonance tear effect causing a platform hole in the fabric of space-time that rent a fissure in the aether between your world and mine, though in order for that to have worked to bring me here, I would needed to have been in the midst of a teleposition spell." I theorize out loud, not noticing the looks on the pairs faces. "Are you two alright?" I say upon taking sight of their faces.

"Grableflargledrangledo." Is all the response I get from Sweetie Belle as her head lolls around and drool drips from her mouth.

"Uhhhhh." Is the only sound uttering from Aberrants mouth as he sits in place staring off into nothingness.

"My explanation was not that complex, even a juvenile of the Academy would be able to understand it." I say, crossing my arms at the twos braindead stupor. At that moment, Rarity reenters the cabin with four menus in hand.

"Oh my, what happened?" She asks, snapping her fingers in front of the pair to break them out of their stupors.

"Huh? Wha? Huh?" The duo spout intelligently as they regain their mental faculties.

"I asked what caused you to act like that." Rarity reiterates.

"I. I can't remember, can you Sweetie?" Aberrant says, rubbing his head in thought.

"Neither can I." Sweetie Belle answers, equally perplexed.

"Ah well, I'm sure you were thinking of all the lovely foods on offer at the trains dining car." Rarity says, handing us each a menu. Qith a quick look, I decide what I want.

"I will have three milkshakes, nineteen cupcakes, a chocolate and strawberry cake, two dozen creme rolls, and a veggie burger." I order, to the doubtful look of Rarity.

"I'm not sure that's healthy."

"I know, that is why I added a veggie burger."

"Very well then. By Celestia she's like another Pinkie Pie." She mutters under her breath as she takes the others orders and exits once again to get our food.

"What are you two going to be learning at this school for the gifted?" I ask.

"I'm going to be learning sewing, painting, drama, magic, and singing." Sweetie Belle declares proudly.

"And I'm going to be learning Archery, fencing, alchemy, chemistry, and advanced mathematics." Aberrant says modestly.

"Those seem rather tame subjects. I applaud you on knowing your limits." I say, sarcastically clapping.

"Oh yeah, well, what would you study if you were enrolled, hmm?" Aberrant shoots back.

"Everything." I reply, causing him to grunt in exasperation.

"You can't study everything, it's impossible." He triumphantly states.

"Then I shall study everything that I can." I say.

"That's if you were enrolled at the school." Aberrant smiles at his victory. At that moment Rarity returns once again.

"I've got our meals, darlings. And I also contacted Twilight about Amena. She said she'd see about getting her enrolled in Celestia's School for the Gifted so she can keep a close eye on her in case she remembers anything." Rarity says, placing our food on the orderees respective lap. I eagerly look upon my plate to begin my feast, only to discover a distinct lack of confectionary goods, and only one milkshake. Looking up at Rarity and back down at my plate for several minutes, my brain finally kicks into gear. With a colossal inhale that shakes the train with its force, I utter one phrase.

"WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY CUPCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I bellow, tearing the windows from their frames and cracking the woodwork in every cabin on the train. Outside several trees collapse whilst many more lose all their leaves and any fruits they were bearing.

After finally clearing the ringing from her ears, Rarity speaks up. "Language! I thought you said your parents raised you proper!" She rages.

"You got my order wrong. All I see here are deep fried straw and a veggie burger." I say menacingly.

"A young lady such as yourself must keep her figure, and such quantities of sugary treats would surely have ruined your figure." She says haughtily, missing the look I shoot her, literally melting a hole in the wall behind her.

"I do not like you, Rarity." I say, dropping the miss entirely.

"Don't worry, soon you'll learn that what I did was what was best for you, and you will come to thank me." She says with a smile.

"May I have some of the parchment in your bag and a quill and ink from your bag, Aberrant." I ask politely.

"O-kay?" He says, handing me the items I requested.

"What are those for?" Rarity asks.

"I'm going to draw a picture," I say as I dip the quill into the ink and begin drawing a series of lines. As I draw my picture, Sweetie Belle and Aberrant begin talking to each other

"Wow, does she have a set of lungs on her or what?" Aberrant questions Sweetie Belle.

"Yeah, I didn't know anypony would yell so loudly other than Princess Luna." Sweetie Belle says in agreement. "Though I don't know why she yelled like that, they're only cupcakes." She continues, she then hears an echo on the wind.

"Cupcakes are the food of the gods!" The voice says those words causes Sweetie Belle to freeze.

"Forgot Pinkie loves cupcakes?"

"Forgot Pinkie loves cupcakes."

"Hmm, so how'd you get into Celestia's School for the Gifted?" Aberrant asks.

"Rarity signed me up when I asked if I could go to a school to learn to sew, she was so happy. How'd you get into CSFTG?"

"Twilight enrolled me when the petition to admit non-Equestrians to Equestrian schools passed. She let me pick what classes I wanted to take, which was considerate of her. I thought she would've enrolled me in all the science classes they have." He says, causing Sweetie Belle to giggle.

"Oh, I just remembered. Amena, Twilight is going to meet us at the train station in Canterlot to help you choose which classes you want to take." Rarity says, not receiving an answer from me, as I am too busy perfectly transcribing a curse rune from memory to pay attention to her. "Uh, Amena, darling? Oh never mind, I'll tell her again when we reach Canterlot."

"Attention passengers, we'll be arriving at Canterlot station in ten minutes, gather your belonging and get ready to depart." A male voice calls over the trains PA system.

"Come along Sweetie, gather your things and get ready to say hi to Twilight. The same goes for you as well, Aberrant, and Amena.

"Okay!" Aberrant and Sweetie Belle chime as they grab their personal effects. I just continue drawing, adding a triple layered Geas to the already unstoppable curse I was preparing.

I am roused from double checking the rune work on my curse by a loud screeching sound. Looking up, I notice Rarity, Sweetie Belle, and Aberrant standing up with their belongings. Quickly blowing on the ink on my piece of parchment I stand up and get ready to follow them.

"Alright, remember to be on your best behaviors, and to be polite to Twilight when you meet her, okay?" Rarity instructs.

"I've lived with her my whole life, I think I know how to act around her." Aberrant states.

"I wasn't talking to you, darling. I was talking to Amena." She says, looking at me.

"Very well, I shall be on my best behavior." I say.

"Okay, follow me then." Rarity says, gesturing to us to follow her.

As I walk out of the train I take my first look at the city of Canterlot. I take in the lame sights of the capital city. I observe that most of the building are made of marble, with golden inlays on tiled roofs. Further on, I see towering mansions and a multi-tiered platform system that separates the wealthy from the poor. I then see a large throng of ponies crowding around a rudimentary market, lacking even basic refrigeration for their produce. Turning my gaze to the train station itself, I notice an oddly giddy puple pony with wings and a horn. As the group nears her, she waves, the gesture being returned by all but I.

"Hello, Twilight." Rarity says, hugging Twilight who reciprocates.

"Hi Rarity, so, is Aberrant with you?" She asks.

"Yes, so is Sweetie Belle, and the dofu she and her friends found in the Everfree."

"It's an Eliatrope, actually, and How has she been?"

"She was surprisingly unphased by whatever trauma caused her to lose her memories, though that is to be expected. She DID lose her memories after all. Though on the train ride here, she threw a tantrum because I didn't get her any cupcakes with her meal on the train."Rarity explains.

"You call THAT a tantrum, she caused thousands of bits of damage to the train!" Aberrant exclaims.

"What?! How could one little eliatrope cause several thousand bits of damage?" Twilight shouts, unbelieving of what she just heard.

"She shouted, darling. She shouted with enough force that the windows flew out of their frames intact."

"... I need to study her." Twilight says, getting a devious glint in her eyes.

"I don't think you'd want to do that, if she can cause this level of damage," At this Rarity points towards the windowless and cracked train," Because somepony didn't give her a cupcake, imagine the level of destruction she could cause if somepony tried to run experiments on her." Rarity extrapolates, causing Twilight to shudder at the thought.

"On second thought, I'll just help her regain her memory." Twilight cedes.

"I have not lost my memory, it is perfectly intact." I say, being completely ignored by Twilight and Rarity.

"Well, I leave you two in Twilight's capable hands, come along Sweetie Belle, let's get you settled into my Canterlot Apartment." Rarity says, ushering Sweetie Belle away.

"Well then, how would you like to stay with me, Spike, and Aberrant?" Twilight asks me.

"If I cared less, it would cause a well of negative careness that would collapse all the cares in the universe into itself, and leave everyone careless being of impulse." I say, causing confusion amongst the two.

"So, is that a yes?" Twilight finally pipes up.

"Yes. It is a yes." I say, sighing as my witty retort is lost on the plebeians in front of me.

"Okay then, let's head off to meet up with spike." Twilight says.

Upon arrival at Twilights supposed place of residence, I am met with one of my oldest foes: Stairs. Steeling myself, I ready to begin the hellish trek up the flight of stairs to reach my goal at the top. Taking a deep breath and squaring my shoulders, I take my first step on the journey upwards, and immediately slip and fall to the ground. The sound of my impact with the ground causes Twilight to look behind her in curiosity, only to see me sitting on my butt at the bottom of the marble staircase of doom.

"Oh, are you alright?" She asks, descending the stairs with a level of ease bordering on arogant.

"I am fine. It is that stairs and I have a long rivalry." I say, standing up and preparing myself to once again, ascend the hell spawn.

"I can carry you up if you have trouble with stairs." Twilight offers.

"I accept your offer." I say, standing up and readying myself to be picked up by Twilight. Instead I feel myself being surrounded in a field of intangible energy. Looking unamusedly at Twilight, I begin floating up the stairs at the behest of her magic. Once her magic dissipates, I find myself on the top landing of the spiraling staircase. Before me is a large oaken door with curving golden inlays. I take in the artistry for exactly one point seven six two seconds, before it is rudely wrenched from my sight by an unseen entity flinging the doors open. Grunting in annoyance, I take sight of the entity that opened the doors, beholding a small, pudgy, purple and green dragon, sans the wings.Taking the liberty of free will, I begin walking through the doors, only to be halted by a purple hand.

"Whoa, where do you think you're going, hot stuff?" The dragon says, in what I suspect was meant to be a suave tone of voice.

"Move, I seek entry to this place of residence." I state, moving to push past him, once again being stopped.

"Sorry, I can't let you in unless Twilight says so." The dragon says, grinning.

"You can let her in, Spike." Twilight calls out from the inside of the building, half down what I clearly see is a staircase.

"Okay, Twilight!" Spike calls back, moving out of the way. "So, you got a sister?" He asks as he accompanies me to the stairs.

"If I did I woul-" I begin, as I set foot on the stairs, immediately losing my balance and tumbling down all twenty six stairs, all the way into a large stack of books and a precariously placed bookshelf, which topples upon me as one of the books disturbs its delicate balance. Groaning, once again, in annoyance, I feel the bookshelf being lifted off me, and the books are cleared away by two pairs of deft hands.

"Are you alright?" Twilight worriedly asks, readying what I can casually identify as a medical spell.

"I am perfectly fine." I state as I brush some dust off myself.

"When you said you and stairs had a rivalry, I taught you were brushing off slipping in a puddle." Aberrant chimes in as he helps me up. "And I must say, you're one hell of a resilient girl." He continues, patting me on the back in the process.

"Are you sure you're not hurt?" Twilight asks again, not dispelling her spell.

"A four ton bookcase can do me no harm." I say, brushing off an event that would have left a lesser being permanently crippled.

"If you say so." She replies dubiously. "But still, You'd best head to bed, I'll be accompanying the three of you to CSFTG tomorrow to help you settle in and, in the case of Amena, choose which courses you'd like to study." Twilight says, cleaning up the piles of books in the process.

"Uh, where's Amena gonna sleep? There's only three beds." Spike asks, causing Twilight to act as if suddenly struck in the head.

"Oh, I guess I forgot, I guess she can sleep with me for the night, since I doubt you two would be up to sharing a bed." She says, coming up with a solution in a matter of seconds.

"That seems fair, just don't keep her up at night with your incessant studying." Aberrant says, causing both him and Spike to chuckle.

"Brush your teeth and then get to bed, you two. I have to talk to Amena about something in private." Twilight says with a light scowl, ushering the two out of the room. As the two leave the room in the direction of what I can only assume is an oral hygiene facility, Twilight crouches down and places her hands on my shoulders, staring at me intently. "Amean, you know that if anypony has ever done you harm, you can tell me without any fear of negative repercussions." She says with a light smile.

"I have never had undue harm done unto myself. And the only being getting even remotely close to harming me in any way was a lust demon." I say, attempting to negate whatever feeling she is having.

"L-lust demon?!" She loudly whispers. "No wonder you act the way you do, the mental scarring an encounter with one of them must have on the mind of one as young as you must be unthinkable." She says, clutching me in a tight hug.

"HIt got nowhere near to me, Eldren caught him in a caging curse and skinned it alive, and then he turned it's skin into a full body suit, of which he dressed it up in, before sewing it onto it's exposed muscle, and then inflicting a geas of eternal torment on it, before casting it unto the fires of purity." I explain to an increasingly disturbed looking Twilight.

"This Eldren must have really cared for you. Is he someone close to you that you've lost recently?"

"Yes."

"The trauma of losing a loved one can be terrible on the mind of a little filly. Come here!" She says, leaning forwards for another hug, of which I swiftly dodge, causing her to fall forwards and smack her face on the floor. Much to my amusement. As she sitting up, rubbing her muzzle, Spike and Aberrant come back into the room and show of a toothy smile for her to inspect. "Your teeth are spotless as ever, now get to bed, you've got to get up early tomorrow." She says, clapping her hands to strike the two into motion. She then takes my hand and leads me down a hallway towards a large room with a massive bed in it.

"Okay, this is were you'll be spending the night." She says as she steps behind a privacy screen and tosses her clothes over it. I hear the ruffling of some clothes before she steps out clothed in a pair of pajamas. "Hmm, you don't have any PJ's. I guess I can ask Rarity to make you some after school tomorrow." She says, tossing back the covers and getting into bed. With a shrug I begin pealing off my clothes as I walk towards the opposite side of the bed, only to feel myself halted by a field of constricting energy. "Why are you stripping?" She awkwardly asks me.

"I am getting ready for bed." I state, taking her momentary confusion and using it to my fullest, quickly throwing off my dress and leaping towards the bed, whereupon I land perfectly and begin snuggling under the covers.

"Oh, I thought you were going to get completely naked." She says, blushing lightly at her own thoughts.

"Sleeping in the nude is not a wise decision, least of all because should a bandit break in, they'll view you as an easy target." I say, curling up and pretending to fall asleep, leaving Twilight to fall asleep with my little tidbit of information on her brain. After I hear the sound of rhythmic breathing coming from all the occupants of the house, I slip out of bed and into the main room, which I begin scanning for any book titles that catch my eye. I spot a book labelled Daring Doo and the Jaguars of Cthuztl Peak. With a piqued interest, I levitate myself up to the shelf it rest upon and take it. I settle down in a chair, book in hand, and baked goodies pilfered from a bakery down the street. I then begin reading the book whilst snacking upon delectable cupcakes.

Several hours later, I found myself roused from my reading induced frenzy to the sound of a cough. Looking up, I spot Aberrant standing in front of me in a pair of boxers and a red blush tinting his cheeks. I realise I have forgotten to replace my clothes from the night before, but I shrug internally and address the barely clad prepubescent in the room, that is not I. "Do you want something?" I ask, catching him off guard.

"I was just wondering why you're sitting in the library reading Daring Doo books in your panties?" He asks.

"I woke up early, and decided to find something to entertain myself. I deemed clothing myself unnecessary as I was the only conscious occupant of this domicile." I elaborate, causing him to blush slightly deeper.

"O-oh. Well, mind if I join you?" He asks sheepishly. I see no problems with him reading along with myself, and so nod in approval. Walking over to the chair I'm sitting in and sitting down next to me, I see him become visibly shocked as he takes a proper look at the book I am reading. "How long have you been up for?" He asks disbelievingly.

Thinking Quickly, I say the first random number that comes to mind. "Twenty minutes."

"You read the first sixteen Daring Doo books in twenty minutes?" He asks me in a dead pan.

"*Sigh* Very well, I did not partake of a slumber last night, as it was unnecessary." State, causing him to roll his eyes.

"Rrrrright, everypony knows you need to sleep at some point. Did you honestly expect me to believe that you never went to bed last night?" He says, looking at me incredulously.

"Yes." I say, not even looking at him as I turn to the next page.

"Okay, I buy that. Say, do you want me to make you something to eat?" He asks." I mean, I'm no master chef like spike, but I can whip up some mean waffles." He continues gleefully.

"I accept, I will have seventeen waffles covered in honey syrup and a large grape and orange milkshake." I order, turning the page yet again.

"Okay, that may take sometime. I suggest you get dressed or something before Twilight gets up." He says, making his way to the kitchen.

"Then would it not be equally wise of you to clothe yourself before she awakes as well?" I ask. Aberrant is about to reply but he is preemptively cut off by Twilight.

"Why are you two almost completely naked in the library?" She asks with barely veiled venom.

"I always wear my boxers around the house when I get up in the mornings." Aberrant says, earning him a nod. "But why were you in the same room as a nearly naked little girl?" She asks again, with venom seeping through her veil.

"Uuuh, a-bu-I-uh!" He stammers. Deciding to not be needlessly antagonist for a bit, I defend him.

"I was in here before he was, he merely walked in, and inquired as to my state of undress. Upon explanation, he offered to provide me with morning sustenance, of which I accepted." I explain, causing Twilight to lose the edge to her argument.

"So, you weren't engaging in indecent acts?" She asks, narrowly dodging the stack of Daring Doo novels I throw at her.

"I would never engage in such acts with one I have known for less than two centuries." I growl, causing Twilight to cower slightly.

"O-okay, I'll remember not to think that way again." She whimpers, scuttling into the kitchen once I have averted my gaze from her.

I stand up and walk into Twilights room and retrieve my clothes. I lift the hem of my dress above my head and release my grip on it, causing it to effortlessly slide onto my form whilst I maneuver my arms through the sleeves. Grabbing my belt, I clip it around my waist. I then decide to forgo my sword and unclip my holster from my belt, as I decide that going around wielding Eldridge items of unfathomable power is not a wise thing to do on your first day at an educational institute. Walking out of the room, I detect the smell of cooking waffles, and make haste to the kitchen. Entering the kitchen, I spy Twilight, Spike, and Aberrant witting around a table with stacks of waffles in front of them. I also take notice of an empty chair with seventeen waffles liberally slathered in honey syrup with a milkshake next to it.

Moving so fast as to seem to have teleported to the chair, I gleefully reach towards the knife and fork set on either side of the plate. Grabbing them, I immediately throw them at the sink and devour the entire stake like a snake, earning me looks of horror from the others at the table. Swallowing audibly, I address them. "What?"

"She's like another Pinkie Pie." Spike fearfully gulps.

"Word of her must never make it to Pinkie, lest Equestria face a famine of disproportionate levels because they engaged in an eating contest." Twilight says, staring at me wide eyed.

"I have not eaten since yesterday, and was feeling particularly peckish." I say, grabbing my milkshake and gulping it down in one go.

"I'll stop by the bakery and pick you up twelve dozen cupcakes and a loaf of shortbread for lunch." Twilight says with a look bordering on dead in her eyes.

"I don't think shortbread comes in loafs." Aberrant says, having recovered almost immediately from the shock of my eating habit.

"Then I'll request a loaf." Twilight says, finishing off her waffles and exiting the kitchen.

"So, what's with that belt I've seen you wear whenever you're fully clothed?" Aberrant asks, gesturing at my belt.

"It contains many things I might find to be of use in the many pouches, it also makes a great carrying device for my bag of holding." I say, petting my belt lovingly.

"That is in no way creepy."

"Agreed." Spike concurs in agreement.

Thirty minutes later, and I am outside a bakery waiting upon Twilight as she purchases me a large quantity of baked goods. She soon steps out of the the bakery with a large bag in hand. Move to step towards her, only to see her not paying attention. I continue forwards anyway and poke her in the ribs, getting her attention rather rapidly. "Sorry about that, I was wondering how to carry of all of this to the school and store it until lunch." She says, idly scratching her head in thought.

"You can put them in my bag." I say, reaching to grab the baked goods from her hands.

"How?" She asks curiously.

"Like this." I say as grab the food and place it all in my bag of holding, much her scholarly orgasmic delight*

"Wow! I must study your bag sometime!" She gleefully states, jumping for joy. Only to be shot down by my dead pan glare. "O=or I could not." She sheepishly says.

"Come on Twi, we'll be late for school!" Spike says as he and Aberrant begin tugging Twilight towards the school.

"Oh, right!" She says, slapping herself in the head whilst simultaneously crossing buy baked goods for Amena's lunch off a checklist with her magic. At this we set off for the school, Spike and Aberrant with child-like glee and Twilight with scholastic intentions. I stare at them distastefully, dreading the sub-par education their school will provide me with. After all, when you know nine tens of the universe secrets, what can a simple school teach you?

I stare in mild interest at the large ornate structure in front of me. I look about the large white brick and painted gold structure to take in pointless and ultimately distracting stain-glass windows, flashy golden inlay-ed pillars that catch the light in such a way as to blind anyone unfortunate to be looking outside during class hours. All along the path leading up to the school itself are large oak trees. I continue trekking up the white stone pathway to the school as I listen to Twilight tell me about the various courses the school offers, listing off all the subjects I likely know more about than the teachers as I go.

"And that brings me to the athletic," She says with mild disgust, "Courses. CSFTG offers courses in various martial arts, fencing, archery, hoofball, track, cross-country, javelin, shot put, and long jump. Though judging by your muscle tone, I doubt you'll be signing up for any of those." She says as she glances at my, to the unknowing, weak looking muscles.

"I shall sign up for all the martial arts, fencing, and archery for the athletics courses." I state. "I will also take runology, arcanic studies, thaumic field manipulation, chemistry, alchemy, physics, engineering, and theoretical mechanics." I finish, listing off the courses I have deemed my knowledge as less than acceptable in.

"All of those magic courses you chose are unicorns only..." Twilight begins, only to break off at the look on my face. Quickly looking elsewhere, lest she get diabetes, she caves. "Fine, I'll sign you up for those courses." At this, we continue our walk into the main building, where we are met by the schools principle.

"Hello there, young ones, I hope you're ready to learn about all the exciting things you'll be studying here!" He says with a well trained false smile on his muzzle.

"Yes!" Spike and Aberrant cheer, overshadowing my disinterested 'meh'.

"Alright, then I'll have my assistant here take you to your classes and give you your lesson plans." He says, gesturing a unicorn over who then leads Aberrant and Spike off down a corridor. "Now then, onto our unexpected new pupil. Due to your sudden last minute sign up, you won't be able to pick what courses you want. Rather, we'll test you in everything we teach here and place you in the ten courses you do the best in." He says, smiling falsely at me.

"Then lead the way, oh obviously unenthused principal." I state, gesturing him to lead the way. My stating my knowledge of his false smile causes him to flinch slightly.

"Well, come along then, wouldn't want to keep professor Twilight Sparkle from her class, would we?" He asks as he places a hand on my shoulder and leads off down another corridor.Upon arriving at what looks like an extensive testing area, the principal speaks up. "Alright, here is where will test all your knowledge in the academia, outside we have prepared all our athletics courses for you to test yourself upon. And upon completion, we shall have all our performing arts courses tests set up in here."

"I will not be partaking in any of the performing arts courses." I state blandly, causing him to chuckle.

"You speak as though you get a choice in your classes." He continues chuckling, closing his eyes to wipe away a metaphorical tear. As he reopens them, he finds himself mere millimetres away from my soul destroying stare.

"I. Will not. Take. Any. Performing arts. Courses." I say, iterating with an increase in my glares intensity. Upon finishing my sentence, he nods frantically, before blinking and seeing me in my original spot. "Good, then let us get my testing under way, shall we?" He nods dumbly as he points me to the desk with large stacks of paper on it.

"You have six hours to fill in as much of the coursework there as you can. I will be back after I take a shower and a shot of gin." He says, walking out of the room with a hollow gait to his step.

After six hours of slowing myself to a crawl to make look as if I actually have to mull over the questions, I feel my stomach rumble. Clenching my stomach in slight agony, the Principal steps forward, looking around him frantically, looking around for some form of monster. As he gets nearer, I begin to re-stack all the coursework into a neat, categorized pile. He reaches me as I am putting away the quill and ink.

"Your six hours are up, you have one hour to eat lunch, and then it's on to your athletics tests. I have also decided to omit preforming arts tests as you clearly lack the tact required to pull any of them off." He says, picking up the paper in his magic and walking off, stepping to the side as Aberrant and Spike enter, accompanied by Twilight.

"Hi, Amena!" Aberrant shouts in greeting as the trio near me.

"Hello." I respond, pulling my bag off my belt and placing it in front of me.

"We thought you might like to go enjoy lunch with the other fillies and colts at the school. Wouldn't that be nice?" Twilight asks, not-so-subtly trying to usher me outside.

"I am fine here." I respond, preparing to remove my lunch from my bag.

"Well you have no choice!" Twilight says with a happy tone in her voice as I find myself encompassed in purple light. The light disperses, and I find myself under an oak tree with Spike, Aberrant, and Twilight. "Sombra should be here." I hear Twilight muttering under her breath, though to me and my vampiric hearing, it is crystal clear.

"T-Twilight!" An obviously terrified voice calls out, prompting me to look in its direction. I look upon what I can only describe as all the bad OCs mashed together in a blender. In my sight is a slender, all black colt with red, green, and orange eyes with dark purple smoke coming off them sitting on the grass.

"Hi, Sombra, how're you finding learning about the wonders of Friendship?" Twilight asks him.

"I-I-I'm finding learning about friendship is an exhilarating experience and I couldn't wish to be learning anything better!" He kiss-asses, prompting a giggle from me. At my giggle, Twilight looks at me with concern, whereas Aberrant, Spike, and Sombra look at me with confusion.

"Why did you just giggle?" Sombra asks, breaking the silence.

"I cannot help myself. Whenever I see someone failing miserably, I find it amusing.

"Amena! How could you say such things?" Twilight exclaims in a scolding tone of voice.

"With ease and years of practice." I mischievously state. "Now, on with lunch!" I shout, pulling out the large bag of baked goods from my bag.

"I thought only unicorns could do magic!" Sombra whispers in awe.

"It is an enchanted bag. Now, I shall dine on my lunch. You can go do whatever it is ponies do." I say, unwrapping all the food and preparing to eat.

"C-can I have some?" Sombra asks tentatively.

"FIND YOUR OWN, FLESH!" I suddenly say in a deep, menacing undertone as my fangs begin to show.

"Not big on sharing. Good to know." Sombra says, before immediately running full pelt in the opposite direction of me.

"You know, it's not nice to be selfish-And you've already eaten it all." Twilight sighs exasperatedly. "I have a feeling you're going to be a handful." She mutters, once again crystal clear to me.

I look upon the various zones set before me, looking on at all the various physical trials I must go through before the day is through. Looking at the zones set out for martial arts and hoofball, I notice a group of ponies in uniforms standing around them. With a shrug, I set off towards the zone marked with a one. Upon arrival, I she a rack with various javelins arrayed upon it. "First up is Javelin toss. Let's see how far your scrawny muscles can toss a javelin." A smug looking earth pony says. I walk towards the javelin rack and grab a javelin at random. Walking towards a white line, I rear back to toss, hearing an impressed whistle from behind. "I can see you've got the technique down, but do you have the strength to pull it off?" With a grunt of disapproval, I launch my arm forwards, throwing the javelin a measly three hundred metres. I could have done better. I hear a gasp of surprise behind me and I turn around to see the earth pony with a look of shock on her face.

"Amazing, you appear to have on-par with your average earth pony, remarkable!" She says. "Now, onto your next test, archery." With this she leads me over to a zone with a series of targets on tracks set at various hundred metre intervals. "Let's see how well you do here." She says with interest. Grabbing a quiver and a compound bow, I once again approach a white line. Taking in a deep breath, time seems to slow down as I sight my targets and notch an arrow. Pulling it back to my cheek, I loose the arrow, immediately drawing another and loosing it. I repeat this process until I run out of arrows. To me it took all of twelve seconds. To the coach, it took less than a second. "Top marks in archery! Hay, you even hit the target way at the back, just out of reach for your bow." She says, singing praise. "Onto fencing." As I arrive at fencing zone, I behold a pony in bizarre attire.

"Greetings, fair maiden. I am prince Luscious, son of Prince Blueblood. It would be my pleasure to face one as fair as thee in the arena, as it were." I will crush him body and soul. Grabbing a sword and taking stance, I ignore the protests of the others present and take a stance.

"En garde!" I command, prompting him to lunge forward. I spin his blade out of his hand with contemptuous ease and score four hits to his torso in rapid succession, causing him to fall over in surprise.

"I demand a do-over!" Luscious demands from his position on the ground.

"No do-overs in real life." I say victoriously, sauntering my way over to the next zone.

A full hour later finds me situated in front of the schools principle near early afternoon. With a look of Disbelief on his muzzle, he clears his throat whilst sorting a sieve of papers on the desk in front of him. Acknowledging that he has run out of procastinationary endeavors, he turns to me.with a look of annoyance in his eyes. "Due to your outstanding scores in every test you were put through, it has thus become my decision to allow you to choose the courses you'd like to take." He says in a begrudging tone.

"All the martial arts, fencing, archery, runology, arcanic studies, thaumic field manipulation, chemistry, alchemy, physics, engineering, and theoretical mechanics." I list off instantly.

"Very well, I will slot you into those classes for tomorrow onwards, have a pleasant day, Miss Winterfall." He says with a sigh of defeat. "Professor Twilight, Spike, and Aberrant won't be finished for another three hours, I do hope you have ways to occupy your time until then?" He asks.

"I can wander around the city for a while and sort out good places to shop and to sell items." I say, turning around on my heel and marching off the school premises. "Tell Twilight, Spike, and Aberrant I'll meet them at their place of residence!" I call out to him as I near the gates. Continuing my walk, I notice a series of strange looks directed at me from passersby. Shrugging them off, I continue trekking around the city, committing everything to an infallible mental map. I am then hit by a delectable smell, a smell almost on par for half the delectability of Elven Sweetcakes. Following the scent, I come across a store called Doughnut Joe's Doughnut Emporium. Entering with a watering mouth, I walk up to the counter to a surprised stallion. "How much are your doughnuts?" I demand, causing him to gulp slightly.

"Twelve bits per dozen, two bits for one." He states nervously.

"Do you know of a metals pawn nearby?" I ask, causing him to change his look from nervous to skeptical.

"Why?"

"I have none of these 'bits', but I do have considerable quantities of precious metals. As such, I will pawn them off for sums of these 'bits' and return here to purchase some of these doughnuts." I explain, causing him to gain an understanding look.

"There's one down the block and to your left." He says, blinking for but the split second afterwards before stumbling in shock as I am no longer in front of him. Rubbing his eyes with a free hand, he blinks several times more, and upon the final blink I am back in front of him with a large sack of bits.

"I would like to purchase three dozen doughnuts, please." I say, causing the already creeped out stallion to whimper slightly.

"R-right away!" He says, sub-consciously snapping off a salute as he hurries about collecting doughnuts. I rub my belly at the prospect of three dozen doughnuts all to myself. I look back up to see the stallion standing with three boxes on the counter in front of him. "Three dozen doughnuts, as ordered, ma'am!" He says in an almost military way. Deciding to play with him a bit, I decide to reply in a pre-cataclysm language.

"Danke." I smile as I hand over thirty six bits and grab my doughnuts, heading over to a nearby milkshake parlor. I enter to the looks of weirded out mares and stallions looking at me. I walk up to the counter and place the doughnuts down next to me and address the cashier. "One Gloomberry milkshake, please." I ask.

"Gloomberries have been extinct for thirty years." The cashier states in a monotone. I growl slightly at his information on the lack of the best berry in this land.

"Very well, I shall have a vanilla strawberry milkshake."

"That'll be four bits, and shouldn't you be in school?" The cashier asks while placing my order. I hand him four bits before replying.

"I am starting tomorrow. Until then I have the rest of the day free, and shall use it learning the lay of the land." I say, taking my milkshake off him and walking over to an empty booth. I sit down upon arrival, and begin digging into my doughnuts, an act which is stopped by six presences crowding around me.

"Well, well, well. Lookie here boys, we've got ourselves a pampered pet. What's say we teach it not to go out in public without its master?" A red colt with a jet black mane arrogantly spouts, earning him a chorus of agreements. The colt reaches towards my boxes of doughnuts, only to find me blocking his hand with my forearm. "Hey, what gives? You should know your place, you worthless pet!" He growls, backing up and pulling a switchblade on me. I finish chewing and then swallow before responding.

"I am nobody's pet, and should you call me such again, I will not be held accountable for my actions." I say in a cheery tone, accented with a light giggle.

"We're not'a 'fraid a you!" The lead colt says. "Pet." He finishes, not noticing me eyes slowly filling with a black mist.

"I told you not to call me pet, worm." I growl in a voice of a thousand voices, each adding more venom and malevolence than the last.

"Heh, what're ya gonna do, pet?" The colt arrogantly continues, not noticing the strategic withdrawal of his companions.

"I am going to Complain to your mother." I say, suddenly dropping the legion voice as a tall unicorn mare waltzes up behind the colt.

"Neighdrew, what have I told you about picking on eliatropes?" She says menacing, causing the colt to audibly gulp.

"I-I-I'm sorreh momma! P-please don't spank me!" The colt cries out, earning him no sympathy.

"When we get home, I'm gonna break out the paddle and beat ya senseless, you spoilt brat." She hisses, grabbing him by the ear roughly. "I'm truly sorreh for ma sons behaviour, he won't be doin' he again anytime soon, I can assure ya of that." The mare says in an unidentifiable accent.

"Thank you kindly, miss." I say politely. Before resuming my doughnut feast, obliterating an entire box in one mouthful.

"Ya remind of this Pinkeh mare I met awhila 'go in a town called Ponyville, I might intraduce ya to her if I ever met ya again." She says kindly, dragging her son away with her by the ear, his cries of pain masking my snicker of pure evil.

~End of Part One~

Author's Note

Decided to make this one a two parter, what with it's current word count no doubt being highly excessive. Also it's nearly 4 am and I have one hell of a cough.