How to Drive Twilight Sparkle Up the Wall.

by Professor Golden Chord

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy
Length: 3094

(2nd Person) There are a few ways to drive an Obsessive–compulsive disorder Unicorn crazy. This story teaches you how.

(2nd Person)
You are a regular visitor to the Book and Branch Library. A stray conversation about Celestia's ability to raise the sun every morning may cause the down fall of Twilight's mind and probably her sanity.

This story is based of an episode of F.R.I.E.N.D. featuring Ross and Phoebe

Published 2014-03-29 23:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-29 23:50:01 UTC

Attack Her Belief

Author's Note

Hey guys, Golden Chord here. I would like to say that thank you for considering reading this story. This is my first story I have ever written. I am terrible at English and I want to improve it. This is one way of doing so. I have several ideas on writing a fun make-your-adventure mystery story; however, I am going to start really small.

I may add more chapters to this story, but I cannot really think of a good way to drive Twilight nuts. I want criticism. If I suck at writing. I want to hear it. Tell me I suck. It only drives me to improve more. I will constantly improve this story: fixing grammar, flow and whatever to make this story better.

Hopefully you enjoy the story. I would like to hear feed backs.

Attack Her Belief

The morning light of Celestia's sun rains upon your deep sky blue coat as you walk toward the Golden Oak Library. The crisp autumn air hang tight to your nostrils. The cool breeze brushing against your body causes you to fasten your cobalt blue scarf. You look up toward the sky to see few weather pegasi working on the morning weather. "I wonder what is it like to fly or teleport for that matter. Beats walking everywhere," you wonder out loud. You first look up to see the lack of horn and look toward your back only to see your saddle bag. Your saddle bag on your back holds several ghost stories you wish to return. Something about the theory of spirit of your deceased love one roaming the land of Equestia searching for something is rather alluring. You like a good scary story, but ghost stories tends to have a whole sadness behind it. Trapped in between reality and belief of the holy place called heaven, each ghost has their stories and it brings wonder of who is right and who is wrong.

Your train of thought was interrupted by a wooden door hitting you square in the face. You flew backward with ghosts circling around your head. "Oh Celestia. Sorry dude. I did not see you there." Unsure whether that voice was in your head or your surroundings, you reorganize your mind and look up to see what exactly just happened. You look up to see Spike right beside the open door of the library. You can only come to one conclusion. He opened the door...well more like slammed the door right into your face....again. "Oh it's you, Clue. Why do you always hide behind the library door?"

"I am not hiding behind the door. You open it into my...you know what never mind." You reply while getting back on your hooves. "Is Twilight here?"

"She is down stair doing her lab things. You can come in of course. Imma head to get more parchment for Twilight." Spike move out of the way for you to pass through.

"Okay, talk to you later Spike," you wave a hoof good bye as Spike make way deeper into town. You walk into the library greeted by the familiar sight and sent of books. You walk up to the table the center of the room, open up your saddle bag and place the your books on the table. Finished with that, you start to search around the library for new stories to read. Scanning the shelves, a book with dark old red binding catch your attention. You picked out the book. It was really thin but looks sophisticated almost. You read the title. "The Allegory of the Cave." Your eyes gleam as you sat in your usual spot and start to read.

A few minute passes when you hear a door squeak open. You look up to see a lavender unicorn make her way into the room. "Oh, hello there Clue. I was not expecting you today. You usually come by on Friday not Thursday." Twilight said when noticing your existence. You only look back down to your book, only giving a nod for a respond. Twilight move up toward the table, grab the returned books and start to re-shelves them. "So how is your story going?"

"Well I just started, but Plato is very intelligent and I am interested of what kind of stories he writes." you said with your eyes still glued to the page of the book.

"I was talking about your Detective Rook series. Your fans have been waiting for your third book for a while." Twilight stop placing back the books you return, hoping to get your full attention. Luckily for her, you close the book in your hooves, look up and her your up most attention.

"Okay, I know you dying to read my third book. I know left a huge cliff hanger on my last one. I know that I am taking forever to finish. You do not need to remind every time you see me." Twilight open her mouth to give some kind of respond, but you quickly interrupt her before she could. "And no, I cannot give you any sort of information or preview of what happens in the book. Remember, spoilers" You then place a hoof on your mouth to imitate the "shhhh" sound. Twilight sits down on her rump, ears flatten against her head and look disappointed. Twilight, again, open her mouth, but you quickly add, "I know you hate when I say 'spoiler' and not any of your puppy dog eyes is going to change anything." Twilight lowered her head looking more disappointed.

"Well, do you I hate when you keep interrupting me?"

"Yes." Twilight is now glaring at you as you smile back and proceed reading the you have at hoof. At this time, the library front door open as a purple dragon walk in to see you smiling while you are reading and a very irritated Twilight glaring at you.

"I take it that Clue have not given you any hint on his novel, Twilight?" Spike ask turning toward Twilight.

"No! I am starting to wonder if he even started on it. All he has been doing is reading random useless fictional ghost stories!."
Twilight now realizing that she needs to re-shelves the book you returned. "Spike, can you re-selves these for me? Oh, could also grab me a cup of coffee before you do?"

"Sure thing Twilight. Let me just put away the parchment first. Clue do you want anything to drink?"

"Oh nothing much, I will just have a dry martini in a deep champagne goblet."

"Um...you want anything else from a baby dragon" Spike said in a monotone voice.

"In a matter of fact, yes. I would like three measure of Gordon's one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well
until it's ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon peel."

Spike went silent and look toward Twilight. "Just get him a glass of water Spike," Twilight replies. With a nod, Spike runs to the kitchen.

"Could you refrain asking my 12 year old assistant to make you an alcoholic drink."

"Awww, you are no fun." Your cross your legs and make a pouty face. "Back to the point though, I have already started on my third book. In fact, I am almost done. Just a bit of a writer block on how exactly to end it. I will also have you know, I am not wasting my time with these ghost stories. I am researching for other possible cliff hanger ending." Spike comes back in with your drink along with Twilight's. Twilight levitate her coffee and sits next to you, while Spike resume re-shelving the books.

" Research huh. Please don't tell me that you going to add ghost to your third book. You know paranormal stuff can destroy a series." Twilight looking very worried

"Of course not! I don't believe in those stuff." You recoil back, almost looking offended.

"Whew. Thanks Celestia." Twilight wipe her forehead as if just had a huge workout.

"Well actually, ghost is not total work of fiction."

"Wait, do you actually believe in those stuff? Do you really believe in ghost?"

"Well, kinda."

"What do you mean kinda."

"I do not believe in transparent ponies that haunt houses or what not. I believe in what ghost represent." Twilight tilt her head signaling to give more details. "Okay. Here is the deal. Every ghost has its story. Stories that makes them unique from each other. Now that was make everyone who they are. You have your stories and I have mine. However, there is also a characteristic we all own--our belief. We have our stories. We have our belief and we reality all around us." You wave your hooves around to emphasize your last point.

"So, what is your point?" Twilight ask, now a bit intrigued.

"Many ghost stories describe them as spirit trapped in between two worlds--the world they lived in and the world of what ponies believe to be as heaven. They are trapped in between reality and belief and that is why they are transparent. Part of them are in reality and part of them are in their belief. And it is because of their unfinished stories is what preventing them to cross over. So they roam the land of Equestria looking for their perfect ending. This why I believe the ghost representation is real. Everyday ponies will have their belief challenge, which create a situation where ponies need to stay with their belief or accept reality. Most ponies would choose one the side, but some could not pick. These leave them trapped between their belief and reality always searching the answer to their problem--which side to choose? And that, my friend, is how you can get a living ghost." You left Twilight wide eyed and looking down at her hooves, obviously thnking what you just said.

"Wow. That is deep, especially for you," Twilight said.

"Yah, I know." Your rub the back of your head with hooves with a small blush on your cheeks. "But me believing transparent walking dead actually exist, that is a laugh." You laugh out loud to prove your point. "It is like me believing ponies transforming into wereponies on a full moon, or Celestia actually raises the sun, or brussel sprout actually taste good or..."

"Wait wait wait! You do not believe Celestia raise the sun every day?" Twilight now inches from your face.

"Of course Celestia does not raise the sun. That is just a bunch of rubbish to tell your foal." You move back giving yourself some personal space.

Twilight got up and a single strand of her mane pop loose. "Hahaha, you are funny Clue. Not believing that Celestia raise the sun every day." Twilight said with one the most awkward laugh. You just sit there, staring at Twilight.

"Twilight, I am not joking. Celestia does not raise the sun every day. Our world revolves around the sun while spinning, giving us the days and years."

"WHAT! How could you believe that Celestia does not raise the sun every day?" Twilight stands up, looking very pissed.

"I just don't. It is just illogical."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ILLOGICAL! I AM THE STUDENT OF PRINCESS CELESTIA, WHO IS A GODLY POWERFUL ALICORN AND IS OVER 1000 YEARS OLD. I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT CELESTIA, WITH HER OWN HORN, RAISE THE SUN EVERY DAY!." Twilight screamed, now levitating a good feet of the ground and engulfed in flames. You however, are not fazed by her sudden self-ignition.

"Okay, whatever you say. I am still sticking to my belief." You said calmly as possible. You proceed by grabbing the cup of water you got from Spike earlier and dousing the fire. This leave a wet Twilight with frizzed mane and coat. You laugh out loud at the sight.
"You are pretty lucky, that Spike did not make me that martini." Twilight, however, was not pleased. Twilight then close her eyes, place a hoof on her chest and point the very same hoof straight out letting out a long breath of air. Now looking calmer, Twilight open her eyes and look straight at you.

"Clue." She said with a soft, calm voice, almost seductive if you ask yourself. "Why don't explain your reasoning in your...interesting belief. Then I will explain how you are horribly wrong."

You ponder of the offer for a while. "Why don't you go first."

"Very well." Twilight still staying calm. "SPIKE!" With the call of his name, Spike is summon. He grimace the look on Twilight's face. He all know too well what that means--a lot of manual labor for him. Spike then quickly turns to you with a face of irritation and fear.

"Why do you keep doing this to me, Clue."

"I do not know what you talking about, Spike." You try to make eye contact with the purple dragon, while holding in your laugh.

"Spike. Get me every book we got on Summer Sun Celebration, Astronomy of the sun and Celestia's power related to moving the sun." Spike fall into a slouch as trotted toward the book shelves.

"Fine." Spike sighed

The rest of the day went really slow. This is mostly because Twilight went though about thirty or so books teaching you everything there is to know about Summer Sun Celebration, Celestia and her power over the sun of the time of 3 hours....no....5 hours. You cannot really tell anymore. All you know it took a long time. You have to admit, it would've taken an hour or two quicker if you have not keep falling asleep and Twilight yelling at you for not paying attention. Spike disappeared somewhere. Probably climbed out the window a few hours ago. He maybe be at...

"CLUE!' You suddenly jump by the sudden scream of your name. You come back to reality to see a Twilight flaring her nostril like an angry bull. "You are not paying attention!"

"Oh, sorry there Twily" You use her brother's nickname for her to drive Twilight even more crazy.

"You know what, I think I explain my point of view just enough." You grimace on that comment. Just enough is not a word you would describe the last five hours. More like over kill you ask yourself. "Why don't you explain your point of view." Twilight said bring you back to reality....again.

"Sure why not." You stand up to stretch out your legs a bit and to prepare your speech. "The reason why the sun seems to move in the sky by itself is because our world is spinning at an alarming speed that one day is about 24 hours. It is when our part of the world face the sun is day and at night is when the sun faces the other side of your world so we don't get any sunlight, but stay in the shadow of our own world."

"But how could the world be spinning? I am not feeling anything." Twilight questions

"Ah, we do not feel velocity. We feel acceleration."

"That still does not prove that our world is spinning in the first place. It may just sit still." Twilight said tying to debunk your theory.

"The answer to that is that the world is spinning in the first place. Our world formed out of a nebula that collapsed. As the nebula collapsed it began rotating, which may seem odd, but actually not rotating is far stranger than rotating. Because of inertia, when our world spin it keeps spinning unless act upon an external force."

"But, but...That is ridiculous! It does not make any sense! How can our world spin so perfectly like that. It is very unlikely for such thing to happen. You are completely wrong. I cannot believe you can believe in such stupid things. What about the event of Nightmare Moon where the sun is few hours late or.." You realize that this is going no where so you interrupt her.

"Okay." You grab both of Twilight's shoulder to focus her attention to you. "Twilight, I am saying that my world spinning theory is a fact that cannot be proven wrong. I am just saying it is one of the possibility."

"No it is not, Celestia raises the sun every day, and that is a fact!" Twilight tries to defend.

"Okay, Twilight, could you just open your mind like this much." You close you hooves together with only a centimeter between them to emphasis your point. " Okay?, now wasn't there a time when all of the brightest mind in the world believe the world is flat? And just 2 years ago, didn't ponies believe that the Nightmare Moon is just a story? Now are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant, that you cannot admit that there is a tinnie tiny possibility that you can be wrong about this?" Twilight pause of a second. She wears a distress look on her face, obviously pondering about what you just said. She finally sighs

"There might be....a tinnie tiny possibility" She whisper quietly, almost competing with Fluttershy. You back up in shock. Your mouth is open wide as you look at Twilight with disgust. Twilight look confuse by your sudden reaction.

"I can't believe you caved." You finally said. Twilight now even more confuse just stood there in silence. "You just abandon, your whole belief system."

"Wait, What!"

"Before, I did not agree with you, but at least I respected you." You continued

"What!"

"How are you going to face Celestia again?" You ask

"But..."

"How are you going to represent the Element of Harmony now?" You interrupted

"But..."

"You are the student of Celestia for crying out loud. How are you going to face yourself." You put on your best sad face. You are even able to make a tear fall down your cheek. Twilight went silent and just stare into space. Several strands of mane pop in whatever direction it chooses on Twilight's head. You can almost hear an engine breaking down in the silence. That is until you hear the noon bell of the clock tower ring.

"Ooooohhh, it's noon." You suddenly said out of the blue. "Time for lunch." And just like that you leave the Golden Oak Library with a very very confuse broken Twilight inside. "And that my friend," You said to yourself as you walk to Sugar Cube Corner, "is how you create a real living ghost. Such a beautiful day too. What could possibly go wrong?"