A Queen's Lament
Part One
All I wanted to do was feed my children. I cannot even do that right. I just wanted to feed my starving children, but instead, my children and I are thrown from Canterlot and left to die. Why must the world hate us for what we are. Why must we suffer.
We had our food, we were victorious, but our victory was stolen from us. I do not hate those who stole our victory, because I know why they did, but anger isn't hate.
There are only one-hundred-seventy-three of my children left; when we went to Canterlot, there were five-thousand-thirty-one of my children. I witnessed every death through the hivemind. I comforted each and every one of my children as they passed into the void. My children have always suffered, we have always known hunger, always known pain. Every one of my children knows how it feels to be so hungry that it hurts.
The worst part of it all is that I am pregnant with the foals of Shining Armor. How am I to raise my first true foals without a father. How would they feel that their father hates their race. How will I feed my foals? I just want what's best for my unborn young, but how can I do that if I have nothing?
I have sent a message to Celestia, informing her of our situation, but I have not received word on any possible relief effort or chance of aid. My race is dying, our children starving, and there is little I can do to stop it.
I don't care anymore, I just want my children to live without fear of hunger or hate. I am going to go to Canterlot after my foals are born to petition Celestia directly, inform her of the direness of my situation, and hope she is merciful. I doubt I will be forgiven, but I have hope that she will at the very least ensure that my foals do not suffer.
I also sent a letter to Shining Armor, telling him how I am carrying his foals. In the letter, I told him to put his response in a specific location just outside Canterlot, where one of my drones will fetch it for me. I hope that he will accept our foals, at least so they will be able to know their father.
I received a response from Shining Armor, he said that he doesn't want anything to do with me, but he will be there for our foals. I am due in seven weeks, I have sent another letter informing Shining Armor of my due date.
I also received a letter back from Celestia, informing me that she is prepared to help my race, but she must first take me into custody. She told me how I could contact her at certain times with a mirror ball, I plan on contacting her later tonight to discuss her terms and what will happen to my children.
"Chrysalis, I am surprised that you contacted me as quickly as you did."
"Celestia, my race is on the verge of extinction, and I am pregnant with two foals; I am pretty sure that the situation requires haste."
"Pregnant with two foals? Is the father who I think he is?"
"If you think the father is Shining Armor, you would be correct. I already was in contact with him via letters and he is willing to take care of the foals."
"So when my guard captain came to me and told me that you had sent him a letter, and what it said, it wasn't just an attempt to manipulate him? You look good for a pregnant mare."
"I would look better if I wasn't scraping by on the bare minimum for my foals and I, but regardless, I am willing to negotiate my imminent surrender just as long as my race gets the support it needs."
"What does your race need? There is surprisingly little information on changelings in the royal archives."
"The dietary requirements of the average changeling is fifteen units of magi-emotive energy a week; one unit of magi-emotive energy is approximately three magi-jolts of magical force in terms of amounts. I can teach you a spell to dump magic into crystals, and convert it to magi-emotive energy."
"If you can convert magical force into food, why can't you just feed off of the ambient magic in the air?"
"The magic being converted has to be directed at something, it cannot be purposeless energy. The only way magical force can be converted is if the source directs it at the crystals."
"That explains some of how you feed, but how do you get magi-emotive energy directly from a pony?"
"Sapient creatures generally release a field of magi-emotive energy whenever they display feelings towards something. Changelings can only feed on positive emotions, and they have to be directed towards us."
"So what do you plan on doing now? You obviously are not just going to sit there and let Equestria help you while lazing around."
"After I give birth to the foals, I was planning on meeting Shining Armor so he can see his children. I was going to leave them in his care while I do whatever I have to so I can make sure my race gets the help it needs."
"One last question, why did you invade Canterlot? Couldn't you have tried diplomacy? I would have been open to negotiating a treaty with your race."
"You do not know? Three months before the invasion, I sent one of my generals to Dodge Junction as a diplomat to negotiate assistance, but he was attacked on sight by the local guard. My general approached the town under a white flag, and he didn't survive his injuries. I thought a race that would do that wouldn't be open to negotiations."
"I was never informed of that incident, and I am going to do a full investigation. If the investigation proves what you stated as true, I will give you a full pardon over the events of the invasion, as it was my ponies' fault that it had come to that."
"Thank you Celestia, I am truly grateful that you are willing to do all of that for my race. I only have one-hundred-twelve left, I cannot stand to lose any more."
"Until next time Chrysalis."
"Before you go, can you ask Shining Armor to contact me through the orbs so I can talk to him?"
"Very well."
I am not quite so depressed anymore. My race is going to get the aid it needs, and my foals will not have to suffer the pains of hunger and fear. I hope Celestia pulls through and saves my race.
After this is all over, I am going to move to somewhere like Ponyville, and write. I always loved writing, but I haven't been able to practice my art in so very long. I had several ideas for novels that I wanted to write; I never actually started on them, but I wrote them all down in a journal that I keep with me at all times.
I just want to be able to raise my foals in peace. I will appoint my best diplomat to handle integration with Equestrian society, with Celestia's approval of course. I do not want to take my race back to the badlands.
--
"So you wanted to talk to me, why?"
"I just wanted to speak to the father of my foals."
"Is that so? I find that a tad hard to believe."
"Believe it or not, I don't really care. I was just wanting to know how this is going to work, and if your wife is going to have a problem with our foals."
"Cadance isn't really happy, but she doesn't want to condemn foals based on who their mother is."
"Did Celestia tell you about why we invaded? About how our attempt at negotiations was brutally killed without even getting to say hello?"
"She did mention that you sent a diplomatic party, she is currently in Dodge Junction conducting an investigation."
"Don't expect much more than this, but for what it's worth, I am sorry for what I did during your wedding. I wasn't trying to hurt anypony, I was just wanting to feed my race."
I already pieced that together from what I have heard, but I still cannot forgive you for all of it. Cadence still has nightmares about it. Heck, I still have nightmares about it. I know that you wouldn't have done what you did if you didn't feel that you needed to, but knowing it wasn't meant to be that way, and truly feeling that way are two different things."
"Well, at least the foals will have a father who cares for them. It is better than what I hoped a month ago. When I sent that first letter, I was expecting you to ignore it and leave us to starve."
"I actually considered that, but when I thought about the foals, I couldn't just forget about them. Even if I despised the mother, they are of my blood."
"So how will it work, you get the foals for a week, then I do? Or what? I was planning on moving to Ponyville after all of this is over, I heard that it is a nice place to live."
"I wouldn't do that if I were you, I may understand why you did what you did, but my sister might not. Not to mention her friends might attack you on sight."
"I see, I do want to live there, I may have to get Celestia or somepony to help me move in without issue."
"Okay… Back to the original question, I was thinking that you take care of them until they can eat solid food, then we switch to where I get them every other week."
"That seems fair, but we will have to see if they can survive off of pony food alone, after all, they are hybrids. We will also have to make sure that there will not be any complications because of it."
"Yeah, you might have to teach me how to feed them if they eat like changelings do… Not looking forward to that…"
"Well, I am tired, I am going to go to sleep now. We can talk again some other time."
"Goodnight Chrysalis, I hope I don't have another nightmare."
Part Two - Pains of Birth
A Queen's Lament
Part Two
I am less than two weeks away from the birth of my foals, Princess Celestia, Shining Armor, Twilight Sparkle, and Princess Cadence are all going to be in the delivery room with me. I am just glad that Celestia has offered her personal doctors, and I will be in a state of the art medical facility in Canterlot Castle.
Aside from expecting mother issues, the general public has been informed of the circumstances behind the invasion. I am just glad that the investigation of the Dodge Junction guard was fruitful. Changelings will be integrated into pony society, and my chosen diplomat to handle changeling relations has an office in the castle. Things are looking up.
I talked to Twilight Sparkle with the orbs the other day, she hasn't talked with her friends about the situation, but she has no hard feelings about Canterlot. She understood the circumstances behind it, and she even said that, in my position, she would have done the same thing. She also has the perfect house picked out for me for when I move to Ponyville.
I am now in Canterlot Castle, in one of the rooms reserved for foreign dignitaries. The foals will be born any day now. We decided to name the foals after they are born, I have some ideas, but we will need to see. Twilight has offered to teach the foals magic if they have horns, I am glad that she will be there for them.
Changelings have begun integrating into pony society, I have explained the laws that they will be subject to over the hivemind. They know that any transformations that they use must be unique, no copying other ponies. A few of my changelings are quite brave, they are forgoing creating a pony persona, and are instead using their transformation to change aspects of their natural bodies to make it easier to tell who is who. All changelings are registering their natural self, along with any alter-egos that they have, and they have been informed on proper feeding. I am proud of my changelings.
"Push! I can see the foal's head!"
With a yell, Chrysalis pushes the foal out. A loud crying is heard, the doctor hands the nurse the first foal. The nurse shows Chrysalis the foal, a white filly with insectoid wings and a unicorn horn.
"Her name is Radiance, my little light of hope…"
The nurse takes the foal to the other room to measure and weigh. The birthing process continues with the second foal.
"There's something wrong here! The other foal isn't coming out right." the doctor announces.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ISN'T COMING OUT RIGHT?!"
"It is angled wrong, it is going to be coming back hooves first. Don't push, we will have to go in with some minor surgery."
"I DON'T CARE, JUST GET THIS FOAL OUT OF ME!"
The doctor applies anesthetic, then pulls out a scalpel. "Hold still, I have anesthetized you, but moving could hurt the foal."
Before Chrysalis could respond, the doctor cuts her open and removes the foal. No crying could be heard, and the doctor is silent for a time.
"The foal… it isn't moving… it didn't make it…"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN DIDN'T MAKE IT!"
"That's just it, it doesn't even have a pulse…"
"My foal… let me see it…"
The doctor shows Chrysalis the second foal, a light grey colt with a changeling horn and holes in his hooves.
Chrysalis lets out a choking sob, "…Dancing Shadow, his name was Dancing Shadow…" Chrysalis breaks down and starts sobbing into blanket wrapped foal.
"Chrysalis, I am sorry… the nurse here is going to clean up Dancing Shadow… I will go tell Shining Armor the news…"
The doctor hands the colt to the nurse, then walks out of the room. After a few minutes, he returns with Shining Armor. The nurse come back in with Radiance, and gives her to Shining.
"Chrysalis named her Radiance, a beautiful name for a beautiful filly."
"Thanks nurse."
Shining Armor gives Chrysalis the little filly, then pulls her into a warm embrace. The others enter the room to the sight of Shining and Chrysalis broken down with the one foal.
Celestia is the first to speak, "Chrysalis, I am so sorry. I know not what you must be feeling right now, but you mustn't be sad in front of your little filly."
Shining Armor gets up and turns to the princess, "Celestia, when you know the pain of losing one of your foals, you will understand. Until then, just back off…"
We buried our little colt today, the pain still hasn't gone away, but it is manageable now… Cadence and Twilight have been taking care of Radiance while Shining and I mourn. At first they didn't understand why, but I explained how the negative emotions could harm the filly if she is exposed to too much of it. Tomorrow we will all be going to Ponyville with Twilight, and I will be moving in.
The colt was buried with the rest of the Sparkle family, and the headstone has a nice message engraved on it. 'Dancing Shadow, holding the hope of what could have been. We will always remember.'
I moved into my new house in Ponyville. The welcoming party was nice, I had some trouble with Rainbow Dash, but we got it worked out. Pinkie Pie is a walking headache, but I am glad to be friends with her. Applejack was skeptical but accepting. Rarity wanted to make me an entire wardrobe. Fluttershy was terrified, but then she saw Radiance and immediately opened up.
The ponies of Ponyville are surprisingly accepting of me, and things are good, but I still feel like ash inside. How is a mother supposed to get over the loss of their newborn colt? I love Radiance to pieces, and Cadence is surprisingly accepting of the whole thing, but I cannot yet be completely happy.
Changelings have been accepted without much fuss, there were a few protests for a few days, but the princesses put an end to that. Changelings that have been residing in Equestria have been registering everywhere. It turns out that there were about one changeling for every hundred Equestrians before we integrated. Now the numbers are about one in thirty. Changelings are integrating fully, registering for education, going to trade schools, taking on different jobs. There were about a thousand changelings hidden in the Equestrian population, but our race is still considered endangered, but things are looking up for the changeling race.
Author's Note
I am bad at pacing sometimes, the feels section is a tad rushed...
