Failure

by Orfearus

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash
Length: 2197

When the hurricane fails, Rainbow Dash is left alone with her past failures and broken dreams.

Inspired by "Hurricane Fluttershy". When the hurricane fails to lift water to the Cloudsdale, Rainbow Dash is left to contemplate her past failures and broken dreams

Published 2012-03-30 01:44:14 UTC
Last updated 2012-03-30 01:44:14 UTC

Failure

Rainbow Dash just stared into the water of the Ponyville Reservoir, not moving, not breathing, letting her thoughts run free. A broken pony stared back at her from the depths of the water. It’s been a week. A week since this water was supposed to go to the clouds. A week since I failed

You wouldn’t believe the backlash of a failed hurricane. Droughts spread across the land, farmers didn’t have enough water to grow their life-giving crops, wouldn’t have enough food to feed their towns and families. And it’s all my fault, because I couldn’t guide the water to the clouds.

What’s worse is they felt they had to express their opinions. And once one pony knew my name, it spread like wildfire. 3 days after the event, letters started pouring into my mailbox; not the kind of letters you would want to receive. Farmers, for all their un-civilized talk and accent, sure have a mouth on them. Some of the criticizing letters I’ve received – there’s bad enough language in them to make even Applejack cringe. Applejack... the pony who was my friend. Even she was disappointed in me. When news reached her of my failure, well, let’s just say I’m glad I wasn’t in bucking range or else my wings probably wouldn’t still be intact.

Well, it’s not that bad. The letters stopped yesterday when the Wonderbolts announced they had an emergency water supply from Fillydelphia. A special team of pegasi were assembled to fly down and bring the water up. And they got to fly under the direction of the Wonderbolts! I would give my entire cloud house to fly with them. But now it seems farther away than ever. Spitfire probably went back to the Wonderbolts and told them of the ‘little pegasus who couldn’t lift water’. I can just hear Soren laughing. They’ll never let me in after this.

Rainbow Dash tore herself away from her reflection and got up off the ground. She always relished physical activity, and hoped that a few laps around the race track would lighten the burden pressing down on her mind. However every flap of her wings reminded her of one thing, a weight pressing down on her; she had failed as a flier. Falling to the ground, she found herself idly pacing around the track, thoughts of the hurricane returning in full force

We were so close though. 795 wing power. That number will haunt me for the rest of my life. Why couldn’t one more pony have been there? Why didn’t Spitfire just join in and help? She would have made the difference! If that pony had just taken off the ground and helped, none of this mess would have happened

For that matter, why couldn’t Fluttershy have been there? Even her measly 2.5 wing power could have made a difference. No, I can’t go around blaming other ponies for this. I don’t want to be known as the leader that couldn’t accept facts. And the facts are it was my responsibility, and I couldn’t do it. My wings weren’t that badly hurting, I could have just pressed myself harder for that extra 5 wing power.

She looked down at her still-bruised wings from the flight. I should have been strong enough. Where did it all go wrong?

Did she push everypony to hard? If she had gone easier on them, they would have easily been able to fight off the feather flu. If only she had been satisfied with the 800 mark, then they would have at least succeeded at that. But I demanded perfection. I demanded a new record. And some ponies just aren't capable of that. In the end, I probably hurt the group more than I helped.

I’m not a leader. I was never meant to be one. However, as the leader of this endeavour I would be the one remembered for the failure. Cloudchaser and Thunderlane would be forgotten – they already were – but not her. I can already hear them

“Did you hear of the pegasus who couldn’t lift water to Cloudsdale?

“Who Rainbow Dash? That pony can’t fly”

“I can fly, I can fly!” Rainbow Dash shouted to the world, launching herself into the air. She flew fast, trying to escape from the screams. Pressing her hooves to her eaves, she tried to block out the screams that were coming from within her own mind. But they kept on coming

“Fastest flier in Equestria? I doubt it”

“I bet she doesn’t even have 10 wing power”

“I do. I have over 16 wing power” she yelled uselessly at the sky, flapping her wings harder in attempt to escape

”I’m disappointed in you, Rainbow Dash”

“Spitfire, please forgive me”

Rainbow Dash couldn’t take it anymore. She let her emotions overwhelm her, and plummeted out of the sky, landing in a florid field a few miles outside of Ponyville. She would never know that in order to reach that field in the single minute she had been flying for, she had broken the 20 wing power mark - the requirement for a Sonic Rainboom - without the aid of gravity.

She just lay in the field, tears streaming out of her eyes. I’m a failure. I couldn’t even lift some water to Cloudsdale, how can I hope to be good enough for the Wonderbolts?” Dreams fell apart around her, everything she had ever lived for was gone. Bathed in the light of the rainbow above her, she cried for hours

"Rainbow Dash?"

A light voice floated through the sky

"Rainbow Dash, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" she shouted, not having the strength nor will to lift her head from her mane. "I'm the first pegasus in the history of Equestria that couldn't bring water to Cloudsdale. Everypony's laughing at me, and I doubt I'll ever get another chance to impress Spitfire now. My dreams of joining the Wonderbolts might as well be gone, and I can't even look a friend in the eyes because of how much I've failed them. How much I've failed myself."

“Dash, it's OK. You were brave, you were loyal. I'm sure they understand.”

“Bravery doesn’t make up for the fact I failed.” The last word cut through the air like a knife, stabbing itself into her own heart. She raised her head to see who was standing by her, meeting Fluttershy's eyes for only a brief second before lowering her head once more.

Why can't I just be left alone with myself she thought. A yellow wing draped itself across her back, bringing with it a flurry of emotions: Anger burned inside her veins, for if only that yellow pony had joined the hurricane they wouldn't be in this mess; relief flowed through her muscles from the knowledge that there was always somepony there for her. What kind of friend was she when she let her emotions break apart her friendships? That was one thing she couldn't doubt, not during a moment like this. Looking into Fluttershy’s eyes, she saw only an infinite kindness expanding into the depths of her soul. A pony that she could share her troubles with.

“I’m sorry I lashed out, it’s just so overwhelming at the moment. I just can’t face it!”

“Face what?”

“My failure! It’s bad enough that I couldn’t raise the water to the sky, but now nopony will let me forget how weak I was, and no matter how hard I try I just can’t escape it.” She pulled a handful of letters from under her wings. “Every day more of these come in, ponies telling me that I’m not strong enough, or that I should never have attempted this. Ponies that feel they’re better than me. And you know what? They probably are. I’m weak and I can’t even face it. A letter arrived from Spitfire a few days ago and I haven’t had the courage to open it. I just can’t face it.”

Futtershy leafed through the pile, flown in from across the country. There were various words used in the letter that she had never seen before, but from the context she gathered they weren’t the kindest of terms. She pulled out a single unopened letter, a pure white envelope with a flaming boarder around it.

“You have to face it.”

“No Fluttershy. I can’t deal with any more disappointment. Not now.”

“You’re a strong pony. You can do it” she said, opening the letter and shoving it towards her friend.

“I’m not as strong as I always make myself out to be. In reality I’m just a weak, pathetic pony that couldn’t even lift water to the skies.”

“Dash, read it. Please. For me. And for yourself.”

Rainbow Dash straightened up and took the letter from Fluttershy. For a while she just stared at the writing dreading what words it would contain. What mocking insults and hurtful expressions could be waiting to jump out at her? She even considered ripping the letter to shreds, but the loyalty and kindness of her friend convinced her see this through to the end. She only wanted what was best, and perhaps this would help. Taking a deep breath, she started to read aloud

“Dear Rainbow Dash

I hope this letter reaches you in good spirits, though I know the opposite is more likely. I know how you must feel right now. Having a knife piercing your heart, and a weight tied to your wings. Not wanting to see the world, nor anypony in it. But I urge you to see past the shallow results and see a deeper meaning in your actions. Look past the apparent failure and see the real successes within. Every pony under your direction surpassed the 10 wing power mark, an impressive feat! And even when faced with adverse circumstances, you did not give up. You should know that never before has such a power been reached by such a small group, and it is as a result of your coaching and guidance that it happened

As a Wonderbolt I am not supposed to tell you what I have written next, and so I tell you as a friend; your dedicated action do not go overlooked, and every day brings me closer to the day when I can write you a formal invitation to join us. A day I know we are both looking forward to.

Until we meet again

May your wings carry you to your dreams

Spitfire”

Rainbow Dash just looked at Fluttershy, eyes wide and aglow with a new found light.

“Do you know what this means?”

“That Spitfire doesn’t think you’re a failure?”

“That my dreams can still come true!”

Launching herself into the air, Rainbow Dash dragged Fluttershy into an aerial hug.

“Thank-you Fluttershy, for being there for me.”

“I wasn’t there for you in the hurricane. It’s the least I can do for you now.”

“Regardless, I really needed you and you were there for me.” Rainbow Dash released her friend from the embrace, and the two of them just hovered in the sky, bathed in the light of the setting sun. “Thank-you so much."

Fluttershy handed back the rest of the opened letters to Rainbow Dash. "You're not done just yet. There is still much more for you to face"

"Yes, but now I have to confidence to do so." Rainbow Dash took the letters back, replacing them under her wings and turned to leave.

"Wait" said Fluttershy, shyly

"What is it?"

"I'm ... I... I just want to apologize for not being there for you earlier. It was wrong of me to leave you at the hurricane. Can you forgive me?"

Rainbow Dash looked down at her hooves, and noticed she still held Spitfire's letter. No matter what happened, her friends were always going to be there to help in the best way they knew how. "I know you had the best intentions at heart. And you're my friend. I will always forgive you." With the, she turned around and headed home, a new found energy in every flap of her wings.

It no longer mattered that some ponies didn’t think she was strong Rainbow Dash thought to herself because I know I am strong, even though it took some friends to help me see it. I am not a failure. My friends helped me see just how much I’ve succeeded. We may not have lifted the water, but every pony under my guidance surpassed their greatest beliefs in their abilities. We truly did succeed, even if not at all the goals we set before ourselves.

She arrived home and bolted into the main room of her house, not even slowing as she made her way to a cupboard on the far side. Opening the doors, she pulled out a stack of parchment and a quill. She was never the best with words, but this was just another challenge put between her and her dream. She would find the right words, even if it took all week. Picking the pen up in her mouth, she began to write, starting with the most important letter.

"Dear Princess Celestia ..."