Masquerade of Steel - The War of Never-Ending R4V3

by KawaiiHagane

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, DJ P0N-3, Alternate Universe, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Romance, Adventure
Length: 670

Steel Masquerade and his old friend Vinyl Scratch must save the land they know so well, AKA Equestria.

Hello, people of the planet Earth. I gather you all here today to introduce my brand new story, as epic and swagilicious as it is. KawaiiMitten presents, an epic tale by Mitten (my persona, obviously) the orange and white multi-species animal… Masquerade of Steel – The War of Never-Ending R4V3

Fair warning: This is a "crack-fic", it's meant to be random.

Constructive criticism is welcomed, and will be replied to in a logical and proper manner.

Published 2014-03-30 04:20:06 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-30 04:20:06 UTC

Chapter 1 - A Poptart Together

Author's Note

Fair Warning: This is a crack-fic.

It is random.

k

Chapter 1 - A Poptart Together

Hello, people of the planet Earth. I gather you all here today to introduce my brand new story, as epic and swagilicious as it is. SuperMittenman presents, an epic tale by Mitten the orange and white multi-species animal…
Masquerade of Steel – The War of Never-Ending R4V3

Once upon a time, in the very happy land known as Equestria, there was a small unicorn foal by the name of Steel Masquerade who happened to be playing on his PS2. Nobody really knew why he played it, or even how he got it. But he had one anyway.

When people asked him why or how he got it, he always replied “Noobs, noobs everywhere.” With a relatively interesting look in his eyes, as if he wanted to burn the whole world and capture it only to rule it through a dictatorship in which he would have all these so-called “noobs” slaughtered in cold blood.

Anyway! One day, Steel was sitting and playing the Star Wars Battlefront II on the PS2. When suddenly his dad walked in, covering his ears as much as he could with his hoof.
“Steel!” His father with no name yelled, trying to get his voice through the loud dubstep playing from the Television.
“What? Dad, this is no time to be interrupting me! The CIS have to be destroyed or else we’ll all be enslaved and used as zombie laborers!” Steel yelled, turning the speakers down so he could hear his father. “Is it about my grades? They’re fine, dad! Mr. Chan said my grades were outstanding and that I’d go far in life!” He yelled again, as if the dubstep was still playing.
“Steel, inside voices please. You didn’t even let me begin what I was going to say.” His father chuckled.
“Sorry, what is it?” Steel said a bit quieter.
“You’ve been moved up to the honors class. You’ll be going to advanced Language Arts and Math lessons ‘n crap like that. Anyway, I’ve got to go to work. See you at dinner?” His father said quickly.
“Yep, see you at dinner.” Steel beamed, so full with excitement that he dropped his controller on the floor.
“SHORYUKEN!” His dad yelled and jumped into the air, then teleported to his job.

*Le jump to school*

Steel sat in his desk, bored out of his mind. The only things they’ve done in class so far are reviews and ice-breakers. After a short while, his train of thought – or the opposite – was broken by the voice of the teacher calling his name.
“Steel Masquerade and Vinyl Scratch.” The teacher announced the two as partners for the ice-breaker.
Steel looked over at the white unicorn with her nicely groomed mane. They locked eyes and smiled at each-other for a moment, then waited to hear what the activity was. After a few more groups were called, she finally revealed the activity.
“We will be doing a short activity. Basically, write three things you like on a piece of paper, and then switch papers with your partner. After doing that, ask your partner why they like the three things they wrote down.” The teacher said grimly, as if she hated her job.
Steel knew exactly what to write down. He wrote down the three words “poptarts”, “PS2”, and “bass”, and then passed the paper over to Vinyl, who had just finished hers. When she passed the paper over to him, he read it.

Bass.
Bass.
Poptarts.

Steel nearly jumped out of his seat.
“HOLY CRAP! WE COULD BE THE EPIC POPTART-LOVING BASS-MASTERS!” He exclaimed, looking at Vinyl with a friendly and excited look in his eyes.
“YES. AND WE WILL LEAD TOGETHER AS THE ALMIGHTY POPTART EMPERORS. I WILL START PLANS FOR OUR AMAZING WEAPON TONIGHT!” Vinyl exclaimed, throwing her hoof in the air as if starting a revolution. This was clearly the start of a super-ultra-mega-awesome friendship.

Chapter 2 - Great and Powerful Makeout Sessions

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