The Best Policy

by SolongStarbird

Rating: everyone
Tags: Flim and Flam, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other
Length: 1964

Silver Shill attempts to pass on the magic of honesty to Flim and Flam.

Silver Shill made a promise to Applejack, a promise that he would be honest. He feels the need to pass the benefits of honesty on to Flim and Flam, whom he has followed to
Las Pegasus. Shill advises them to change their marketing strategy in order to show them that honesty is the best policy.

Written for WTG #014

Art is once again by angelstar000.

Published 2014-03-31 21:20:05 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-31 21:20:05 UTC

The Best Policy

He felt bad for them. Honestly, he did. Flim and Flam had never truly learned to be honest, and that is why they had hired him. He was Silver Shill, shill actually meaning a hawker's accomplice who plays the part to convince customers. After learning so much from Applejack, he had promised her that he would be honest from then on out. Of course, his name didn't help. It labelled him as a dishonest pony. Then again, he had been for most of his life. He was ashamed, and had been very happy to change.

After vowing to be honest, he had felt the severe need to pass it on. This was the reason he had followed Flim and Flam in their hasty retreat from Ponyville. He was going to help them. Only this time, it would be to sell a product the right way.

"Well, we're here!" Flam announced, twirling his mustache. "What should we try selling to the wonderful citizens of Las Pegasus?"

"We still have plenty of our tonic, and I doubt that word has spread fast enough for them to know what Ponyville knows," Flim suggested.

"Why don't we try something new? You know that they will eventually find out," Shill replied in attempts to persuade his business partners.

"Shill, Ponyville had Applejack, one of our biggest rivals. She was prone to nosing around. Here we have a blank slate. We have never been here before. It will take them much longer to figure out, if they ever figure out at all!" Flim guffawed.

"That is just the point, your dishonesty has ruined your reputation throughout most of Equestria. Why ruin it again when we can regain our good name through honest dealings?"

The brothers took a moment to consider the proposition. The looks on their faces denoted serious thought. Flam was the first to reply.

"Applejack has really gotten to you, hasn't she?"

Shill took a deep breath. "To be honest, she has. I believe what she says, and honesty has served her well, so why can't it do the same for us?"

He hoped that his asseveration was continuing to have an impact on the two as there was once again a moment of silence, deep contemplation, and some mustache twiddling.

Flim was first to speak this time. "Then what are we going to do with the rest of the tonic?"

Shill thought for a moment. "We could relabel it and sell it as what it truly is: apple and beet leaf juice."

"I am afraid that in the marketing world, that isn't very exciting. I doubt anyone would buy it," Flim replied in a defeated manner.

"It is true, that curative tonic sounds much more appealing than apple and beet leaf juice," Flam agreed.

"Listen, just because we are being honest doesn't mean that we can't still advertise its benefits. I'm sure that apple and beet leaf juice is very healthy. We will have to check the facts, but I am sure that it can be sold as a health drink."

"I suppose so, but relabeling is going to cost us. Can't we just sell the rest as they are first?" Flim suggested.

"That would be more economical," Flam agreed.

"But it would be dishonest! At least admit to its faultiness and sell it as what it is, despite the misleading label, a clearance of sorts. Tell them you are relabeling and all that remains costs less. That way, when we have the new labels ready, we already have a base of customers to work off of," Shill persuaded.

"Wouldn't that just reveal our dishonest side right off the bat?" Flam asked.

"Yes, but it is still better than lying."

"We could always say that we had the bottles ready, but never got the tonic to work, so we are selling the dud batches in the bottles."

"Wouldn't that be dishonest?"

"Not really," Flim cut in, "We did put a tonic that didn't work in the bottles, and we are attempting to sell them of honestly."

"That isn't the whole truth," Shill protested.

"But it is still the truth none the less," Flam said.

Shill felt his thoughts crash. Applejack had never said anything about partial truths, and if it was still the truth... No! He had made a promise, and he was going to keep it. He felt that it was wrong to even only tell half of the truth. He made an attempt to cajole the Flim Flam brothers.

"I think that if we just come out, tell the whole truth, and admit our faults, the honesty will paint us in a good light that spinning a partially true story would never be able to do. It will label you as the good salesponies you are."

"Come on Shill, we have altered our tactics for you enough already," Flim grumbled.

"Trust me on this one," Shill pleaded, "I can make this work. Just let me advertise the juice this time around."

Flim and Flam considered the offer. They turned, whispered in a huddle, and then turned to face Shill once again.

"Okay, we will let you," Flim said.

"But if you mess this up for us, we keep any profit and dump you off on the side of the road," Flam stipulated.

Shill gulped. He had to remind himself that being left in Las Pegasus wasn't the end of the world, and that that wouldn't even happen. He would show these two the benefits of being an honest salespony, even if he barely knew anything about the sort himself. He would keep his promise, no matter the tribulations.

"I won't let you down," he promised.

"You had better not," Flim responded.

"You were lucky we kept you after the whole tonic incident. Don't mess this up," Flam threatened.

The first thing Shill did when the shop wagon rolled into the city was locate the library. A quick browsing of the section on plants and cuisine brought him to discovering a myriad of effects that beet leaves provided. They did everything from provide high amounts of vitamin C to help prevent cancer and reduce swelling. It seemed that not everything the brothers had sold this thing to be was not complete garbage. However, he would make sure that the new label, as well as the marketing campaign, was completely truthful.

That night, their shop tent was set up on the edge of the city. As ponies gathered to see what the promotional music was all about, Shill stepped out from behind the curtain. Hopefully what he was about to do wouldn't leave him searching for a homeless shelter.

"Um... Hello. I'm Silver Shill, and I work for the Flim Flam brothers. We just came from Ponyville selling our mixture of apple and beet leaf juices. We called it the Flam Flam Bros. Curative Tonic. Honestly, it isn't a tonic, but the mixture of beet leaf and apple juices produces some amazingly healthy effects, including..."

Silver Shill began listing out all of the benefits that the juices provided, and then pulled out a few of the bottles and opened the crowd up to a taste test. Once everypony had had their chance, he gave the announcement that he hoped would produce some sales.

"We have decided that even though this is not a tonic, it is still full of its benefits. As you may have noticed, all of our bottles still have the tonic label on them. Until we get some relabeled bottles, there will be a clearance sale on all of this juice: 70% off of the original tonic price."

It was clear that this city had its fair share of bargain seekers, because half of the audience bought at least one bottle. It was then that Flim and Flam came out into sight, wearing their best showpony smiles. "That's right fillies and gentlecolts! There will be a clearance on all Flim and Flam Apple and Beet Leaf Juice in mislabeled bottles!" Flam announced.

"And if we gain enough profit and you truly love their product, there is the possibility that Flim and Flam Apple and Beet Leaf Juice will stay available to the populous of Las Pegasus past our departure," Shill added.

Flim and Flam shot Shill a disbelieving look, and then returned to their normal, perky attitudes.

After the showing, Flim and Flam sat Shill down and questioned him.

"What was that!?!" Flim asked Shill.

"I just brought about the beginning of a new economic opportunity for you guys."

"Don't be a hypocrite Shill. You keep telling us to only make promises we can keep," Flam added.

"Listen! Listen!" Shill interrupted, "I said that it may happen, not that it will happen. Also, in the very real instance that what I said does happen, I fully intend to keep the promise I made, even if it means that I stay here. Plus, imagine being able to sell your products in two or more locations. You guys could start a business, a corporation. You could be making so much more than you do now. This is what happens when you aren't being kick out of town after town for selling faulty products."

Both brothers sighed deeply. "I suppose you are right," they replied.

This escalated exactly so. A two weeks after there initial arrival all of the old bottles were sold and the new labels were ready. Another two weeks after that, Flim, Flam, and Shill got a stall at the Las Pegasus market. Another month led to a local grocery store carrying the product, and soon it was apparent that Shill's proposition had come to pass. Shill stayed to manage sales in the city as Flim and Flam went on to spread their new chain, just as he had said he would o if he had to.

In a year, Flim and Flam were enjoying the vastly greater profits of a small corporation. It was on a day in that period of time that Shill received a letter from them.

Dear Shill, we would like to thank you for opening our eyes to a whole new world of business, a world where we don't have to hawk and lie, but rather know that if our customers stop buying our product, it is because of circumstances that most likely have nothing to do with the way we are selling our product. With this said, I believe that it is time we open a shop in the one place we have had an exceptionally hard time in in the past: Ponyville. We still don't know if the Apple family has fully forgiven us for our past wrongdoings, so we are sending you to open up shop there. You, of all people, are most likely to be able to get them to believe the truth. It was there, a year ago, that we tried to sell the juice as a tonic, and Applejack passed her honesty to you, which you in turn gave to us. We hope that you can finally gain the redemption of our name there, and that business will be successful.

Flim and Flam<

Shill put the letter down with a big smile on his face. He went to turn the shop keys over to the manager. He was sure that the mare he had hired to run the store a few months back could handle the ownership. He just couldn't wait to show Applejack that he had kept his promise, and then some.

Author's Note

I set a personal writing record here: over 2000 words, in a day. No joke, I looked at the prompts for the first time just this morning on March 31st. I am so proud of myself.