A Short Scene, in Which Princess Celestia is VERY Pissed Off, and Prepares to Kick Major Ass, with Twilight Sparkle Along for the Ride

by Super Trampoline

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Thriller, Adventure
Length: 642

Something has captured Celestia and blocked her magic. That something is gonna get a buck to the face.

Something has captured Celestia and blocked her magic. That something is gonna get a buck to the face.

Rated T for language and de-alicorning (unpleasant horn removal).

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-02 17:03:58 UTC

Ass Kicking Imminent

"MMMMPHH! MM MHM MMH MPHHPH!" And with that, a bound, gagged, and blindfolded Celestia was casually thrown into the large pit, half a mile inside Canterlot mountain. She tumbled down the rough, nearly vertical rock walls, a new gash opening each time she made contact. Several bounces and two hundred feet later, a loud splash was heard, and she sank like a stone in the twenty feet of muddy, inky black water at the bottom.

There was the sound of deep, malicious laughing, and an abomination standing at the pit's cusp fired a beam of energy at the vaulted ceiling above. The chamber echoed with destruction, and twenty tons of boulders and debris fell into the hole with furious velocity. Loud plunking noises could be heard, and soon the pit was a cocktail of one part rock, one part water, shaken, not stirred. After a good fifteen seconds, the reverberations died out, and the clip clop of something evil could be heard trotting away, their source satisfied at a burial well done.

At the bottom of this mess, Twilight Sparkle groaned, smarting with a hundred fresh bruises. This had NOT been a pleasant week.

Buried under fifty feet of water and rubble, Celestia was blinded, incapacitated, and in a world of pain. Good thing she didn't need to breath, because that wasn't happening anytime soon. She tried to move, but winced as a wave of pain played through her fettered limbs. She tried to summon her magic, but the supressor ring at the base of her alicorn sent it ricocheting back into her skull. She tried to scream, but the muzzle on her snout, the gag in her mouth, and the water in her lungs had other plans. The pressure was nearly overwhelming, and the rapidly forming migraine did not make matters any better.

More worrying than the physical discomfort, was the feeling inside her, one she hadn't felt for several decades: fear. Celestia liked to be in control. Not because she was bossy, but because she wanted to keep her little ponies safe. Right now, she was not keeping her little ponies safe. A shape-shifting monster that made Chrysalis look like a chew toy was running amok above, and she was trapped at the bottom of a herself-forsaken pit. This was not good. This was bad. Very bad. This... Celestia experienced the unusual sensation of crying underwater. She let the tears flow out, utterly alone and scared.

Twilight was done hyperventalating. That was so four days ago. She was

Yes Twilight, I am mad. I was an idiot for trusting that monster, and now we all are paying the price. Look, I know I keep up this air of inpenetrable tranquility ninety percent of time. Everypony with a lick of sense knows that; they just are too scared to call me out on it. I may generally keep my emotions in check--heart attacks aren't any more pleasant for aliens like myself--but I think we both know each other well enough to drop the formalities. Right now Twilight, more than anything, I am fucking pissed. Is that clear?

Twilight shivered. Generally, she enjoyed hanging out with her former mentor not generally being confined in a small space next to her mentor

"Dammit Twilight, as your princess, I COMMAND you to snap off my horn. Is this clear?

"Y-y-yes y-your maj-j-jesty."

It will grow

Celestia writhed on the ground, blood splattering upon her face, forehead, and mane. She held pressed a fetlock hard against the dribbling mess where her horn used to be.

Oh No, Celestia seethed, "I'm better than alright. I'm not okay. I'm pissed off. Tell me, Twilight Sparkle, have you ever dealt with a pissed off earth pony who can fly?

"Well, no, I haven't, but..."

"Yeah," Celestia interrupted. "And, neither has Goodluck Daisy."