The Apple-Cider Men

by pinkieandraritybest

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Comedy, Romance
Length: 899

The Flim Flam brothers finally make something that Applejack can't see through, but this new creation stirs up a lot of trouble, especially when it causes both brothers to fall madly in love with AJ.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-02 06:34:49 UTC

Arriving Once More

A Third Chance

Flim and Flam were painstakingly out of ideas. After the failures of both the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 and the Cure All Tonic, Ponyville would never buy their products again. Inside their trailer, Flim was doodling in a notebook and Flam was twiddling with his moustache absentmindedly. The room was messy, full of crumbs, pencils, and discarded inventions. There were posters on the wall: a map of Equestria with many of the cities crossed off, ads for their older contraptions, business sign rough drafts. Their furniture would have been nice had they not old gears and oil stains on them. Their trailer had once been well-kept and pristine, but business had been rough on both them and their abode.

Flim suddenly leapt up, a new idea finally coming to him.

“A pre-pay love potion to sell in Manehattan!” he exclaimed. Flam looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.

“Manehattan? Why would they buy our merchandise? Cons only really work on small town ponies.”

“Only the old-fashioned kind,” Flim explained. “But city ponies are suckers for love, and pre-paying items. There are tons of stories where they get ripped off because of them!”

Flam considered it, and Flim, seeing this as his chance, added the last straw.

“And no Apples live there.”

Flam grinned wickedly and agreed to the plan. The twins immediately started preparing their new scam, writing up important-looking ads. They hired a mare to act as a buyer, and made a fake potion out of punch and apple juice. After a few days of putting it all together, they set out for Manehattan on the earliest train.

It was 5:30 in the morning when they reached the big city, giving them plenty of time to set up. Instead of coming in with a flashy presentation, they made themselves up as humble street vendors on a busy street. Once it got later in the day, the mare mixed in with the crowd to prepare for her entrance. Ponies started slowly walking up to their stand, cautious about this so-called love potion.

“Come see the one and only Love Elixir!” Flam announced flamboyantly.

“Guaranteed to make whoever drinks it fall deeply in love with the first pony they see! Pre-order it today for twenty bits!” Flim recited quickly and fluently. “You there, young mare! Care for a sample taste?” The mare they hired stepped out of the crowd and purchased their display bottle, using the fake money they gave her. She drunk it dramatically with her eyes shut, flipping her starlight-blue mane as she put it down. Opening her eyes, she sighed and stared at a colt that was standing in front of her. The colt blushed as she beamed at him.

“You saw it right here folks!” Flam announced gallantly.

“Buy one while supplies are available!” Flim shouted.

“Stop! Don’t buy anything from those crooks!” a voice shrieked from the crowd. A cream-colored pony stepped forth defiantly. She had a green and orange streaked mane in a tall up-do, blue eyes, and was wearing a jeweled necklace. Her cutie mark was a peeled Satsuma orange. She looked at the Flim Flam brothers with disdain, almost as if she recognized them, though they had never seen her before.

“I know you two, and your scams,” she huffed. “My cousin Applejack told me all about how you tricked her family twice with your schemes. Well, I’m not falling for it, and I won’t let anyone else fall for it either.” She scanned the crowd and declared, “These two are deceitful con-men, and this Love Elixir probably doesn’t even exist. Giving your money to them would be like throwing it off of Hooflyn Bridge!”

The two brothers and mare gaped at her. As ponies start to walk away angrily, Flam was the first to speak.

“How could Applejack be your cousin?” he asked. “You’re an Orange, she’s an Apple.”

“Our mothers were sisters,” she answered simply. “I have my father’s name.” At that, she trotted away, pride in her step. The twins looked at each other in shock, having not expected the country pony to have such close relatives in the big city. The mare still stood there, a look of surprise on her face, slowly morphing into a wide grin.

“So, you two know Applejack?” she inquired.

“Yes, she’s a clever pony. Always sees past our cons and comes out on top,” Flim sighed.

“I know what you mean. She and her friends once humiliated me to the point of ruining my past career. I admit I went a little crazy after that, but I did apologize, and yet they still left me in this broken state!” the unicorn sneered.

“What is your point?” Flam said.

“I know these ponies pretty well, and I have a plan that could help you sell a product, so long as you promise you’ll make them pay.”

“How do we know we can trust you? You’re practically a con-mare yourself. Do you know Applejack’s weakness or something?” Flim scoffed.

“Simple. Magic. She’s too much of an Earth pony to comprehend it.”

The two brothers just stood there for a minute, thinking this over. They didn’t know the mare well, but if she really could help them, it would certainly be worth it. They exchanged a glance, coming to a decision.

“Alright, Trixie, tell us the plan.” they said.