Time is set for the pies, now time's for the wastin'
Author's Note
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Time is set for the pies, now time's for the wastin'
You were quite surprised when Pinkie Pie asked you over, but you certainly weren't going to complain. You'd always had a certain liking for the exuberant pink mare, but had seldom had an excuse to spend any time with her. Still, she knew everyone in town, to a surprising degree, so of course she knew she'd missed your birthday on accident.
It wasn't her fault, you weren't even sure why she felt obligated to throw you a party, you weren't really friends or anything, but you weren't going to turn it down. Everypony wanted the chance to have a party thrown by Pinkie Pie.
The mare had been out of town when your particular B-day had arrived, something about a Rock Farm emergency. You'd never really been one to throw a big opulent party, so you'd celebrated with a few close friends. Still, the idea of having a big hoedown intrigued you.
You walked down the path to the saccharinely designed building the pink mare called home. You could see the cart the Pie's used to deliver catering was gone, that meant you two would be alone, that would be nice. Pinkie Pie wanted to do some planning before putting the party together and you knew the way she got into party planning, that would be a good thing if there were few distractions.
You knocked on the door to the building, looking around at the giant chocolate bar that was the door.
A jaunty little tune pushed its way from between your lips. Some number that Vinyl Scratch, one of your more personal friends, had shown you as a joke. It was a song called 'Swingin' the Plot'. It had been a big hit a decade ago but now it was only used to embarrass friends who you knew were of the rear-loving profession.
"Singin' the plot, is the move that, grabs me and holds me, I'm hot as sugar and you gotta' mold me~," You sang under your breath, bopping your head a bit to the melody.
You weren't even really concious you were singing it until the door swung open and you found a bright pink nose inches away from your own, head tilted curiously.
"What are you singing?" Pinkie Pie asked. You very nearly fell over.
"O-oh nothing!" You chuckled, catching yourself. "Just some stupid song from ages ago, you know, just something that got stuck in my head."
She looked suspicious for some reason, but then Pinkie Pie hardly needed a reason for anything, everyone in town knew that. But the expression vanished quickly, replaced by a smile that very nearly touched her ears.
"Okie dokie lokie!" She gave a little bounce. "Come on in! I am so excited to plan your party."
She turned and headed back into the house, and of course the tune was quite true in your case, you couldn't help but give her rear-end a look as she did. Your reasons for agreeing to the party were perhaps not as innocent as you'd justified in your head; Pinkie Pie easily had the best butt in the whole of Ponyville. Thank Celestial for bakeries, because all those cupcakes had added just the right amount of softness to make it bounce and jiggle delightfully, that little hop in her step certainly helped in that regard.
You weren't sure if it was her hyperactivity, or if she just had good metabolism, but that rear end seemed to be the only part of her that ever seemed to get any chub, and even then it was far from being flabby or dumpy. It was just as round and perfect as the triad of balloons that adorned its side. Oh what you wouldn't give to just press your fa-
"Are you just gonna stand there silly? Or are you gonna help me plan this party?"
Your eyes actually managed to tear themselves away from the soft wonderfulness that followed that mare to look at her face. She was looking over her shoulder at you curiously. If she'd noticed where your gaze had been aimed, she gave no inclination.
"O-oh yes, sure." You tried to get the blood rushing back into your brain instead of.... other places. You looked around for a way to get in front of her as you caught up. If you had to walk behind her this whole way you probably weren't going to hear a word she said.
Still, the hallways were too thin, she'd already passed the restaurant portion of the building and was heading towards the stairs as you finally managed to close the gap, It was too late.
You were behind Pinkie, The Prodigious Posterior, Pie. As she walked. Up the stairs. Oh sweet merciful princesses.
It was even worse(Better!) than you thought it would be. She slowed down on the stairs to talk to you and you got to watch every rise and fall of her haunches in close detail. You were only two stairs down from her, her poofy cotton candy tail held ever so slightly higher for the effort of climbing the stairs swaying back and forth slowly as she walked,
As her left hoof rose the plentiful, playful chub would bunch together and shake ever so slightly, while the right would grow lean to support her weight, the whisper of strong muscles hiding under that cushiony flesh singing to you as she moved. Up and down, and down, the view teased you like no other.
She was talking to you, but damn it all if you were listening to a single syllable. You were too enthralled by the playful, bouncing ballet of her hips, the gentle sway of her tail, the cushy, pleasantly pleasing pink of it all.
You're sure it actually took a moment or two to reach the top of the stairs but it seemed all too soon to you. With a final shaking step she reached her room.
"And that's when the pigeons will be released and the fireworks go off!" She finished, turning to look at you over her shoulder again. "Are you listening? " She tilted her head. "You've seemed distracted all day. I should know because I'm always distracted. So many parties to plan so little time!"
She did a little hop on the word 'Time' and it was a herculean feat to keep your eyes focused on hers.
"O-oh yeah, I'm sorry, I was just..." You tried to find something to say. "Thinking we should use doves instead of pigeons!"
She looked suspicious again for a moment, turning around to put her nose up close to yours. "Hmmm...."
A drop of sweat dripped down your brow.
"You're right! Doves will be SO much prettier! Not to mention Fluttershy recently got lots of doves after Rainbow Dash tried to shoot that kung fu movie." She suddenly did a little jump and clicked her rear-hooves together. The surprisingly acrobatic motion sent her rear jiggling wildly. She gave a little laugh, then flipped into a handstand before bounding forwards into the room.
“Wee! Doves!” She sang happily as she walked over to the corner of the room.
You gave a sigh of relief as she bought your story and got on with the party planning. Today was going to be a long day if this kept up.
She grabbed a couple rolled up sheets of paper and set them on a nearby table, getting everything set up as it should be. As she did that you got a look around her room, of course, it was rather pink like her, there were balloons hanging everywhere, all floating at just the perfect height, you couldn’t help but wonder how much this girl spent on helium in a month, but that was neither here nor there. She had various pictures of her and her friends around, all at various parties and functions she had planned, along with an eclectic mix of things that had no context for you, but were nice all the same.
One particular picture caught your attention, the sight of her in a catsuit, standing next to the local librarian caught you off guard...but you certainly weren’t complaining, that thing hugged her body so tight you were quite curious if they had to melt it over her to get it to fit. Even from this front view her rear was very obvious. It jolted out to the side slightly as she hugged the unicorn next to her, the supply curve of her cheeks bound in smooth latex, it was enough t-
“Oh yeah! I love those pictures!” Your thoughts were interrupted by that rather cheerful voice. “Twilight was obsessed with time travel, Star Swirl the bearded and all that hoopla, it was fun though! We had a lot more ice cream than you’d expect.” She grinned. “Now come on silly! I’ve got your party all planned out right over here.”
She turned around and before you even got a chance to get off your haunches you found her puffy cotton candy fluff of a tail wrapped around your neck and pulling you forwards. That thing was surprisingly strong. What caught you most off guard was its apparent mobility; you’d seen AJ do some impressive things with her rear appendage, but Pinkie’s seemed downright prehensile...not to mention soft. It cushioned around your neck like the softest scarf in the world, a sweet smell enough to match it’s fluff wafting up into your nose. She literally smelled like candy. You couldn’t help but take a small, intentional inhale. Saccharine.
“You walk down the street, with ponyville fillies, watch her tail shake, like you I get silly...”
The lyrics to that Celestia forsaken song ran through your head as you were pulled along like a dog on a leash. The fluff of the darn thing hid most of your face, for all anyone could tell everything below your muzzle was just pink fluff.
Of course, as you had this observation you noticed the view that his particular hold offered you. Your eyes trailed down her tail to the real softness that interested you most. You could see the dock of her tail flexing slightly as she held you, right above those twin hills of sweet, delicious cushion. She was practically hopping. You clamped your mind down like a vice, on a certain part of your brain, the part that was quickly giving up it’s sense of logic, for the sake of giving strength to a certain other part of you.
You were both happy and sad when her tail released you, and she hopped to the other side of the table to give you a grin over her various plans.Your face still smelled like candy. You couldn't’ sit down at the table fast enough, at least it offered some...er....cover, for a growing problem of yours.
“So! Here is where the guests enter.” She pointed to the floorplan of Sugar Cube Corner she had laid out. “I was thinking goodie bag table right there, with a scuba mask, a marshmallow, and a hummingbird call, along with lots of other yummy treats!”
You just nodded, until your brain caught up anyway. “Wait what?...Hummingbird call? Scuba masks? What do they need those for?” Her grin curled up along her face even more, you weren’t sure if the expression was endearing or terrifying…
“You’ll see~”
You decided it was perhaps best not to question further. You listened and nodded, trying to keep your attention solely focused on her to make up for your earlier...distractions. Your hidden ‘Little friend’ calmed down a bit as she spoke about where to put the balloons, and who should sit with who and other such things. It progressed without incident until she got to the stage portion.
“Stage? What do we need a stage for?”
She tilted her head. “Well the dancers of course! There’s going to be a musical number, if it’s your birthday there’s gotta be music!”
You rolled your eyes and gave a little chuckle. “I think that’s a bit much Pinkie, what’s next, a stripper pole and a lapdance?”
Your chuckle petered out as she stared at you with rather disconcerting intensity. “Uh...sorry, bad joke I suppo-”
“Would you like that?” She said, pressing her nose against yours, her stare unwavering. You were thrown quite off-kilter with where this was going, you weren’t quite sure if she was totally serious of if this was perhaps some kind of test….either way you didn’t think a lapdance at you birthday party would be particularly appropriate…
“Uh...I was joking Pinkie...just joking…”
“That doesn’t answer my question.” She got a bit closer to you. “Would you like that kind of thing? This is your party, and it is being thrown by me, Pinkie Pie, the ultimate bestest party pony around, and that means that I must make the birthday pony’s wishes come true, it’s my job!”
Your mouth opened, then closed as your brain caught up to the rest of you, still reeling at this turn of events, was she serious? The idea sounded nice….very...very nice, but you weren’t the kind of stallion to get a lapdance in front of close to a hundred guests, judging by her invites list. It just didn’t seem...right.
“Pinkie, I don’t think it’s going to be that kind of party...I mean, it’s not some private get together...this is a big party, who knows who might be there...doing something like...well...that in the middle of this kind of event would be a bit distasteful.”
She studied your face for a few moments longer, you felt a bit of sweat trickling down your forehead as you internally wondered if this is what it was like to be interrogated. She seemed to come to a conclusion and and nodded slowly. “I hear ya….” She clicked her forehooves together. “I hear ya loud and clear…”
You weren’t sure why exactly that sounded menacing, but you were just glad at the opportunity to switch to another topic.
“Okay then...uh...why don’t we pick a color for the ca-”
“Nope!” You found her soft hoof covering your mouth. “Everything else about the party is a surprise. Which means you have to get out.”
“But I-” You muffled.
“Out! Haven’t you ever head of surprise? That means that the surprisee, and the surprise-er can’t plan together!”
You weren’t quite sure how it was possible, but in the span of about three seconds, she picked you up, gathered your stuff, and placed you down the stairs, dazed, on the doorstep of Sugar Cube Corner before giving you a quick hug and dashing back inside with a slam of the giant chocolate door.
“O-okay then….” You said to no one in particular.
The next day was the day of the event. You woke up as usual, got ready, and set off in the direction of the party you knew would be occurring down the street. You got a few well wishes from the members of the community who knew you well enough to remember the fact it was the anniversary of your birth. You briefly wondered why they were out and about, it seemed like they should have been at the party, but knowing Pinkie Pie she probably had something planned. In some cases, even if you weren’t invited to a Pinkie Pie party, you ended up going anyway...sometimes whether you wanted to or not…
It didn’t take long to reach the door to the place. Your sense of unease grew a bit more as you noticed the lack of banners, streamers or balloons. As far as the outside of the place was concerned, it appeared as though it were any other business day, there were no traces, not even a hint, of anything going on inside. Things kept getting stranger, but you shrugged it off, and decided to knock anyway. For a few moments it was silent, and you started to worry that Pinkie Pie had changed the plans without telling you.
“Coommmmeeee innnnnn~” A familiar sing-song voice drifted through the door.
Well...she was in there at least...but something wasn’t right. You opened the door to find all the lights off...this couldn’t be a surprise party...but were people hiding anyway? It struck you as very...off… You walked into the darkness, looking around warily. “Pinkie Pie?...” You called out, the store wasn’t that big, but somehow the words seemed to echo.
“Come on, come on, no dilly-dallying in your birthday!” She giggled.
You stepped further into the darkened shop, looking under chairs and around tables as you went...there were indeed some balloons here and there, and a bit of confetti on the floor, but it really did appear that there was no one here besides you and the pink mare. This didn’t look like a Pinkie Party at all...
“Where is everyone, Pinkie?...” You said, warily stepping forwards. You were so busy looking around that you bonked your head into the stage right in front of you. “Ow….”
You fell back onto your haunches, rubbing your so re head with your forehooves when two spotlights flashed brilliantly. You were blinded for a moment by the brightness of it, before your eyes refocused.
The stage was fairly large, filling up the majority of the room, The curtains were closed, and they were a deep, almost sinfully red color, with golden tassels along the bottom. You could hear Pinkie Pie giggling behind them, but it wasn’t the usual, bubbly sound you were used to...it was a lot deeper...a lot more...for lack of a better word...hungry.
“Time to grant your birthday wish…” She purred.
Your eyes widened. “P-pinkie Pie...what are you doi-”
The curtains swung open as a third spotlight illuminated her. It was so bright you could only see her silhouette. She was standing on her hind legs, her hooves held up in the air behind her. You could see the light shining through the ruffled lace of some garment she was wearing; a large feather bobbed cheerily above her head.
She shifted her hips to the side and your eyes were drawn down the slope of her body immediately, in that silhouette the sheer suggestive femininity of her pear shaped form was enough to send tingling sensations throughout your loins.
“What am I doing? Only what you requested silly….”
The lights shifted and she was revealed. She wore a burlesque outfit, a deep purple color which offset the pink of her coat to a disturbingly pleasant degree. Fishnet stockings climbed up her legs to her haunches, clinging so tightly you could see the supple pink flesh fighting against the imprisonment. Her hips shifted again as she rubbed a hoof against the curve of her haunch, you could see it depressing under those stockings, the covering of her body making it all the more enticing. The lace around her thighs leading back to her rump was delightfully bouncy, shifting along with her movements.
“You’re drooling…” She giggled.
You realized your mouth was hanging open and you quickly shut it, wiping your mouth off with a hoof. “Pinkie...I….I didn’t request….”
She nodded slowly, her eyelashes fluttering in your direction. “You’re talking to the ultimate party pony. I know how to read between the lines...what you really wanted for your birthday. No need to be shy, silly billy.” She got back down onto all four hooves, strutting towards you. Strutting was really the only word for it; her hips swung to either side more than you thought physically possible.
Being a baker, Pinkie Pie had encountered a lot of sweets over the course of her life, and they had collected in the best of places. Her hips were wide enough to be plainly visible even from the front, and with each shake they jiggled ever so slightly, held by those tight, straining stockings. Your eyes followed them like a dog following a bone, and from her gaze, she knew exactly where you were looking.
She came to the end of the stage, laying down on the smooth wood to reach out with a hoof. Pinkie caressed the bottom of your chin, lifting your eyes up to meet hers. Her touch was soft, almost like it wasn’t there at all.
“Now...about that lapdance…” There was a click from somewhere inside the stage. Behind her a large pole rose to the roof, you weren’t quite sure when she’d managed to install that, but you’d learned never to question Pinkie Pie’s actions...She stood again, your neck strained as you tried to keep in contact with you, the movement automatic on your part, your lower nature quite certain that it never wanted her to stop touching you. “We’ll have to build up to that...wouldn’t want the party to be too short, but I think you’ll enjoy this part nonetheless…”
She turned, her hoof finally leaving you as she walked back towards center stage, but not before the poofy length of her cotton candy scented tail wrapped itself around your neck, before slowly dragging under your chin. You leaned forwards with it as the cloud-like appendage drifted under your chin, very nearly falling flat on your face as it left.
Your eyes were once again drawn to her hips as she walked, the view from behind was even better. You’d never thought much about stockings before, but now you were quite certain they were your favorite garment in the universe. The way they kept her bountiful asscheeks in those perfect, jiggly spheres was almost too much to handle. You could feel yourself growing excited, something warm and throbbing beginning to peek out between your legs.
That wonderful jiggly show ended as she turned again, one hoof hooking around that pole and sending her into a dancing, graceful spin around that pole. With a flourishing motion suddenly a familiar jazzy tune started up. The sensual saxophone, complete with a honkytonk piano and a large double bass from nowhere drifted over you. With every deep bass filled beat of the drums her body shifted slightly, her plot shaking to the beat.
‘When you walk down the street, with Ponyville fillies...’
She spun twice around that pole again wrapping her hooves around it, her rear pointed out towards you as she bent down low on the pole. The soft roundness of her rear going taunt for a moment as she hiked her plentiful pink posterior into the air. Her tail lifted out of the way, dancing about in the air like the softest feather boa imaginable.
‘Watch her tail shake, like you I get silly…”
She began to gyrate, shifting her legs, one down, one up, one down one up, her cheeks bouncing and jiggling as she shifted her weight, casting a lecherous glance over her shoulder as she put on a show for you.
‘You’re as sweet as candy, and I’m takin’ a bite….’
Pinkie Pie shifted her hips in slow sensual circles, using that pole for balance before spinning around, undulating her body as she did. You could see the lines of her back through the fabric. She faced away from you as she leaned back against the pole, her tail lifting once again as her bountiful ass practically swallowed that pole, the pink fluffy thing wrapping around it like a candy cane stripe.
‘Will it taste like Pinkie Pie or turkish delight….’
She began to grind on the the pole, working it up and down between her cheeks with slow swaying motions. Her body surprisingly sinuous as as she danced along it, almost like a snake. Your eyes widened as you contemplated those lyrics. You were achingly hard, but you still had enough of your faculties to manage a few words.
“The song...it’s….”
“About me?” She cast a smirk at you over her shoulder, her body still in motion. “Yes, those Appleloosa ponies know a hoof and a half about jazz...and they don’t call me Kinkie Pie for nothin’....” She flipped over, wrapping her legs around the pole and slowly spinning towards to face you. “Do you like your birthday gift so far?”
You gulped audibly.
“I’ll take that as a yes...now...lets get to the lap part of this Lapdance…” With a flick of her rear hoof she was back on all fours, swaying towards you. “You’ll find a chair behind you.”
You blinked, but when you turned you did indeed find a chair. “How did yo-”
“Do you really wanna question it?”
You thought for a moment. “Not really….”
“Good…”
When you turned back around you found her come hither gaze inches away from your own. She closed the gap, pressing her lips against your own. The shock of the kiss knocked you over, she tasted sweet, like a decedent thick desert. Your rump landed in the chair as she broke it with a deep, throating ‘Mmmmmm’
The music continued to thrum around you.Alright! You’re hot to the touch, you’re mane’s cotton candy…
Pinky Pie got onto her hind legs again, putting her forehooves on your shoulders, the intimate closeness. Her hips slowly gyrated from side to side in a move that would make any belly dancer weep openly. Her full round rear swinging too and fro with a slow sinuous movement, as though she were made of liquid pink. The smell of dripping sweetness flooded over you like a wave as she moved, her body occasionally brushing over your own in her movements.
If the sugar's too much, pincha salt comes in handy…
The motion changed, instead of side to side, her hips began to move in slow circles, bringing her closer to you, to feel her warmth, her soft belly pressed against your chest as she basically climbed into your lap. Your body told you on some level that a pony should not be able to sit like this, but your lower nature said you’d twist over backwards if that meant this could continue.
That same lower nature, began to make itself known between the pair of you, pinned between your body and her own lovely form. You stiffened as she began to grind against it, the silky softness of the fabric she wore promised the kinds of things your mind could hardly comprehend. She leaned more heavily against you, giggling as she felt it throbbing. Her full, plump, pink lips brushed against your ear. “Someone’s ready to open their present...would you like that?”
You nodded, biting back an incoherent noise.
Can I get your recipe, and are you a la carte?
“Alright then...get ready to unwrap, birthday boy.”
She swung around on you lap, standing up in front of you once more, her back facing you as you watched her sway to the beat of the music, the slow moan of trumpets and the base beat of drums painting across her body’s muscles to make her move in ways you didn't think were possible, the ruffles at the edge of her outfit danced across her curves like lovers as her hooves slid around to her front...and you heard a zipper.
Her clothing fell around her hooves like leaves fluttering to the ground, and her back was revealed to you in all its glory. You had seen it before, but now that it had been hidden from you, for however briefly, it was all the more sweet. Your eyes trailed down along her body as it widened into the curve of her rump, her poofy cotton candy tail trailing along after the sensuous undulations of her hips, brushing over those round slowly shifting cheeks.
Pinkie bent back down onto all fours, making a show of it, the motion pressed her rump back towards you.
You gasped as your throbbing member was softly pinned between those two amazingly plush globes of flesh.
Mix lollipops with laughter and a smile for a start….
She began to press back harder, swallowing the whole of your shaft between her cheeks, giving you true appreciation for the size of the party pony’s posterior. It forces your hind legs open a little, plushy pink flesh spilling out around the sides of your thighs as she pushed back against your cock.
Swingin’ the plot! Is my single most favorite confection….
She began to bounce, up and down, up and down, her cheeks clenching tightly around your cock as you shuddered and squirmed with the sudden overwhelming sensation. She started slow, but with every motion, up and down, she went faster.
Put on an oven mitt, I need protection!...
You were lost in a sea of pleasure, moaning, eyes clenched shut, imagining the beauty that was her body in front of you from touch alone as that full, bouncy, delightfully delicious pinkness engulfed your cock so completely. You couldn't hold out against such an assault.
Singin’ the plot! Is the candy I just can’t stop thinkin’ ooooofffffff…..
As the singer’s voice rose, the sound vibrating through both of you, Pinkie’s gyrations reaching a feverish crescendo of intimate touch, you let out a shuddering cry, your body growing rigid. With a deep throb your cock gushed long ropey streams of cum all over her back, getting into her mane and tail as you unleashed your load.
Swingin’ the plot!
The song ended with a clash of symbols and blast of horns. Pinkie slowed to a stop, keeping your cock sandwiched tightly between those cushey pink hills. She looked at you over her shoulder, licking a bit of cum that had managed to land on the tip of her nose off with a lecherous sound of enjoyment. “Have fun?”
You panted, slumped totally against the chair, squirming as her cheeks occasionally tensed around your trapped stallionhood. “Y-yes….”
“Good.” She grinned, taking out the scuba mask and the hummingbird call. “Time for gift two.”
