Assistant Hindrance- Season 4- The Lost Episodes- Two

Chapters

Cold Open
Act One
Act Two
Act Three

Cold Open

It was another beautiful morning in Ponyville as the sun shone down on the Library, wherein Princess Twilight and her faithful assistant Spike where having a small dispute.

"Spike, you put these books on the wrong shelf!"

"No I didn't! See! It says 'Non-fiction!'"

"But these are Daring Do books!"

"I know! And Daring Doo is real! Remember!"

"Oh yeah. . .well. . .that's supposed to be a secret! We can't have everypony knowing that Daring Do is real! These have to go back in-," Twilight stopped when she noticed a small flower shaped button behind the books she removed with her magic. It looked similar to the horseshoe shaped button Spike found during the Mirror Pool Incident, "Oooh, another button! Maybe it opens another compartment with another rare book inside it!" Twilight immediately pressed the button.

CLICK!

Twilight jumped in surprise when a loud rumbling sound came from the basement.

"What was that?" Spike said nervously.

"Let's check it out," Twilight said as she walked towards the basement door with Spike close behind.

After going down the stairs and reaching the bottom, the pair immediately noticed the hole that has opened up on the ground, revealing more stairs that led down to what appeared to be an ancient cave.

"I hope this isn't like the evil dark stairwell of terror in the Crystal Empire!" Spike said nervously.

"Relax, Spike. At least we can see the bottom from here," Twilight said as she walked down the short stair well. She lit up her horn an illuminated the cave around her. Etched on the walls were images of ponies having some kind of celebration. Going around the walls of the chamber was a long image of what appeared to be a parade, with a Princess-like figure sitting in the leading float. However, this "Princess" didn't appear to be an alicorn.

But they took in these ancient carvings with a glance, because nearly all their attention was captured by a marvelous flower that grew in the center of the cave, growing out of a pile of purple soil. The flower had a long green leafy stem, and it had 5 pinkish-purple petals with a hot pink center in the shape of a heart. What was most amazing about the flower was the way it sparkled.

"Wow. . .imagine if I gave Rarity a flower like that!" Spike said in amazement.

Twilight walked over to the floor and looked at it closely. "I've never seen a flower like this before!" she exclaimed. Using her magic, Twilight gently uprooted the flower and gave it a closer look. "I wonder what kind of magic it possesses."

Just then, the pile of purple soil began to tremble and shake violently.

"Twilight?" Spike said nervously.

Still holding the flower, Twilight backed away from the trembling purple soil. Suddenly, the pile exploded, sending dirt flying everywhere. Twilight brought up a magical shield to protect her, but clod of dirt scored direct hits on Spike.

The dragon spat out dirt and wiped his face, "Urrgh! That's just great!" he complained, but then he brightened up and said, "Oh well, another 7 hour bubble bath for me! Right Twi!? . . .Twi?"

Twilight was staring blankly, looking in front of her. Spike turned in the direction she was looking, and he gasped. Covered in the purple soil, was another dragon just about his size. He was a deep blue color, with an orange belly and ear fins. He also had a purple mohawk on his head. He opened his light blue eyes and looked up at Twilight and the flower in her telekinetic grip.

The dragon stood up and looked seriously at Twilight. "I am," he said in earnest, but then he raised an eyebrow and tapped his head with a claw, "Oh, wait, wait, wait. Um, I know this one. Don't tell me. . ."

Spike and Twilight stared at the confused dragon, who seemed to be gaining a headache.

"How did this guy get down here?" Spike asked.

"I don't know, Spike," Twilight replied.

The blue dragon's eyes suddenly lit up and he broke into a smile, "Aha! That's it! Spike!" To Twilight's shock, the dragon ran up to her and bowed down before her, "Kenbroth Gilspotten Heathspike. At your service, your Majesty!"

Act One

Assistant Hindrance

Written by Matthais Unidostres

Twilight and Spike looked down at the newly awakened, and slightly dirty, dragon.

"Who are you? How'd you get here?" Twilight asked.

Heathspike stood up and said in a british sounding accent, "It is my destiny to forever serve the Princess who picks my magic flower."

"Oh," Twilight said, glancing at the flower in her telekinetic grip, "But why were you buried in that dirt?"

Heathspike shrugged, "To me, if I'm not dutifully serving a Princess, then life isn't worth living!"

"Wait a minute," Spike said in confusion, "You mean, if you're not serving a Princess, you just. . .sleep?"

"Indupatedly!" Heathspike replied with a nod.

"Indupa- wha?" Spike said.

Heathspike rolled his eyes, "It means 'yes.' Forgive me, but I get impatient with those not as smart as me."

Spike ground his teeth and got close to the new dragon, "Are you calling me stupid!?"

"Calm down, Spike," Twilight said as she pushed the pulled the purple dragon back, "I'm sure he didn't mean anything bad."

"Hmmph!" Spike said as he folded his arms grumpily and turned around to head up the stairs. "If you need me, I'll be drowning my frustrations in seven hours of bubbly goodness."

"Hold it right there Spike," Twilight said sternly, "You're not the only one that needs a bath." She turned to the blue dragon and said with a smile, "And I think our guest should go first."

"WHAT!?" Spike exclaimed.

Heathspike bowed respectfully and said, "Thank you, your Majesty. And to prevent any confusion in addressing myself and the vocabularily challenged one, I suggest you refer to me as Heathspike."

"That'll be fine, Heathspike," Twilight said brightly, "And feel free to call me Twilight."

"As you wish, Princess Twilight," Heathspike replied.

Twilight filled the tub with water and bubble solution, and soon it was filled with white foam.

Heathspike scratched his chin, "Hmmm. . .I actually have memories of having a an extra good bath quite a while ago." He grinned, "Let's see if I can't relive that experience!" He then jumped up high and dived right into the tub with a splash, sneding water and foam flying. Twilight used her magic to create a shield, but Spike was hit in the face by the water.

"Pfft! Oh come on!" Spike said as he spat out bubbles.

Heathspike floated up on the surface of the water, whistling as he began scrubbing his toes with a bath brush. "Wash-a-runi, I know you don't mean to stare! I know that you're wondering what's under here!" Heathspike sang, "Just trust and see! And soon I'll be! Feeling good! Feeling good!"

Spike ran up to him and slammed his claw over the other dragon's mouth. "GRR! Your voice is terrible! Stop singing! NO MORE SINGING!"

Twilight used her magic to pull Spike away from the tub, and the two of them left the bathroom. "Heh-heh-heh!" Twilight laughed nervously, "Sorry about that. We'll just let you enjoy your bath, now, okay? Good."

Twilight closed the door, and then turned her attention to her faithful assistant and friend, "Spike! What was that!?"

"Did you even hear his voice!?" Spike exclaimed, waving his arms around and then putting them over his ears in emphasis, "Scootaloo sings better than him!"

Twilight sighed, "Yes, he's not exactly at Sweetie Belle's level, I'll admit that. But you don't have to be rude! He's a guest in our house!"

Spike scoffed, "Yeah, a guest who probably has been sleeping under this place for years! He's pretty much has the world record for trespassing!"

Twilight groaned and face hoofed, "Look Spike, I'll talk to him and try to discover who exactly he is and what this is all about. But for now, just try to be nice, please? Don't you remember what happened when you got upset with Owlicious?"

Spike turned to see the owl sleeping peacefully on it's perch. Spike sighed, "Yeah, I got so angry and jealous and it was just a huge mess."

Twilight hugged the little dragon and smiled, "So you should know that you have nothing to worry about."

Spike smiled back, "You're right Twilight. I'm sorry. I'll be nicer to Heathspike, I promise."

Suddenly, the bathroom door opened, and out walked Heathspike, his scales shinny and free of dirt. Even his claws sparkled white like pearls. His purple mohawk was also well groomed and vibrant.

"Good as can beeeeeeeeee!" Heathspike sang out triumphantly.

Spike ran over to Heathspike and said, "Look, I'm really sorry about what I said about your singing-"

Heathspike suddenly spun Spike around and pushed him into the bathroom while saying in a hurried voice, "Yes,yes, apologies accepted, sticks and stones and all that, you need a bath much more than I did, and a longer one too, such dirt and stench shouldn't be hanging around a Princess, give yourself a good scrubbing!"

"Uhhh," Spike said as he stumbled into the bathroom and turned around to face Heathspike.

The blue dragon smiled at Spike and waved. "Parting is such sweet sorrow!" He quoted, and then he slammed the door shut.

Spike blinked in shock, "What just happened?" Spike then shook the cobwebs out of his head and sighed as he turned to the tub, "If there ever was a time for a seven hour bubble bath, this is it."

Meanwhile, Twilight and Heathspike were headed downstairs to the first floor of the library.

"Who's this?" Heathspike said as he pointed to the sleeping owl.

"That's my pet owl, Owlicious. Shhh! Let him sleep," Twilight said softly.

Heathspike just shrugged uncaringly, and soon the two of them were sitting across from each other at a table. In the middle of the table was the magic flower.

"So tell me," Twilight began, "How did you end up under this Library?"

Heathspike shrugged again, "I couldn't tell you. Being asleep for thousands of years can affect your memory."

"Thousands of years!?" Twilight exclaimed.

"Oh yes. At least, I think it's been a few thousands years," Heathspike said calmly as his tail snaked up and grabbed the stem of the flower, wrapping it around his tail until it was secure, "I mean, when my last Princess' time was through, it was my destiny to sleep until a new Princess found me and picked my flower. You can imagine how slim the chances of me being found are. I'd say, perhaps, 1 in 132.175 million?"

"Wow. . ." Twilight said, "So. . .your destiny is to serve a Princess?"

"Yes, Princess!" he replied with a bright sunny smile.

Twilight stared at Heathspike's wide blue eyes and cute smile. Twilight though hard as she looked at the young dragon. Soon, the only choice became clear to her. "Heathspike," she said, "I hereby appoint you as Secondary Royal Assistant."

Heathspike bowed down low and said, "Oh, my beautiful Princess! I am so truly honored and solemnly swear to serve you-" he suddenly stopped sort and he stood up straight, "Wait, Secondary?"

"Yes," Twilight said with a nod.

"Who's the Primary?"

"Spike."

Heathspike stared blankly at Twilight, but then he suddenly burst out laughing and fell flat on his back, kicking his legs and swinging his tail. After a minute or two of laughing, Heathspike opened his eyes and looked at the serious and slightly angry facial expression of Twilight Sparkle.

"Ummmm. . .you're serious?" Heathspike said as he got back up on his feet, "I mean, with me around, you won't be needing that little juvenile-"

"Stop right there!" Twilight said, slamming the table with her hoof, "Spike is the best assistant anypony could ask for. No offense, but neither you, or anyone in Equestria could come evevn close to Spike. He's irrepalacebale, and I want you to know it."

Heathspike's hair and ear flaps seemed to droop in shame, "I am sorry, Princess. Please excuse my talking out of turn."

Twilight saw how sad the dragon has become, which caused her angered expression to calm down. She sighed and placed a hoof on the dragon's shoulder. "It's okay, I understand how you feel. Serving a Princess is your reason for living, so there's no way I could turn you away. So as long as you work with Spike and be nice, I'd be happy to have you here."

"I understand you completely, Princess!" Heathspike said with a smile.

"Very good," Twilight said as she brought out a scroll and quill with her magic, "Now, Spike is going to be busy for seven hours, so we can set up your duties and get a few things done around here." Twilight giggled happily and clapped her hooves, "Yay! It's checklist time!"

"Excellent!" Heathspike said, "Shall I serenade you with a checklist song?"

Twilight's eyes widened and sparkled. "You know a song about making checklists?!" she practically squealed.

Heathspike nodded enthusiastically and sang, "Do you want to write a checklist? . . ."

Seven hours later, Spike walked out of the bathroom with a towel on his head. He pulled the towel off and tossed it into a nearby clothes' hamper.

"Ahh. . nothing like a nice warm seven hour bubble bath to wash away all your worries," Spike sighed contentedly. The purple dragon ran down the stairs and called out, "Twilight! I'm finished! What are you and HS up to?" When Spike got down stairs, he saw that the library was empty.

"Where are they?" Spike asked.

"Hoo," Owlicious said.

"Twilight and HS."

"Hoo."

"Twilight and Heathspike."

"Hoo."

"Nevermind. . ." Spike groaned.

Suddenly, the front door opened and Twilight and Heathspike walked in.

"Oh, Spike, you're done with your bath," Twilight said.

"Yeah. Um. . .where were you?" Spike asked with slight suspicion.

"Well, since you were busy for seven hours, Heathspike and I went an mapped the old Castle of the Pony Sisters," Twilight said as she tapped her saddle bags.

"Huh?" Spike said with wide eye innocnence.

"Hoo?"

"Not who. Huh," Spike corrected the owl.

"Umm. . ." Twilight said nervously. She then looked down at Heathspike and gave him her saddlebags, "Heathspike, go ahead and store all this cartography away."

"Yes, Princess Twilight!" the blue dragon said with a bow, and he gathered up the bags and ran up the stairs.

Spike watched the other dragon run up the stairs, and then turned towards Twilight and demanded, "What's going on here?"

Twilight put on a wide desperate smile, "Spike, how would you like to have a trainee?"

"You didn't tell him he could work for you, did you?" Spike asked in horror.

Twilight narrowed her eyes and put her hoof down, "Spike! He's been asleep down there for thousands of years! Serving a Princess is all he knows, and all he wants to do. If he doesn't have a Princess to serve, he will fall asleep again, maybe for a thousand, or even ten thousand years! He won't be able to make friends in Ponyville or live life or anything! You don't want that to happen to him, do you?"

Spike's horrified expression gave way to one of concern. "Wow, when you put it like that. . ."

Twilight put a foreleg around Spike and held him gently, "I knew you'd understand. Just remember that you're still my number one assistant and friend. But Heathspike needs us, and he needs us to be his friends." Twilight then smiled gently and said, "And you know. . .he is the same age as you. I was thinking . . .maybe. . .you could be like a brother to him?"

Spike's eyes widened, "A brother?"

Twilight laughed nervously, "Well, it was just a thought. I-"

Spike suddenly scampered up the stairs laughing and cheering, "Alright! I got a brother now! This is great!"

Twilight breathed out in relief and smiled. Owlicious, however, closed his eyes and shook his head in a very grave manner.

Act Two

Spike pushed open the door to Twilight's room to find Heathspike putting scrolls into Twilight's drawers. "Hey! H.S.!" Spike said.

Heathspike looked up and eyed Spike oddly, "Are you speaking to me?"

Spike nodded, "Yeah, sure. Ya know. H-S. Heath-Spike. Get it?"

Heathspike just shook his head and tut-tutted sadly. "Oh, Spike. I'm sorry that my name is too hard for you to pronounce. But please at least try, because I never did like nicknames."

Spike's left eye twitched, but he kept in his anger and said, "For your information, I can pronounce your whole name. Kenbroth Gilspotten Heathspike. There! I said it!"

Heathspike chuckled as he walked over to his purple counterpart. He tapped Spike on the nose with a claw and said, "Good for you. But you can call me Heathspike." The blue dragon chuckled and turned away, leaving Spike to stand fuming in place.

"Keep it together. Keep - it - together," Spike thought to himself. He sighed and said, "So. . .Heathspike. . .what's your favorite kind of gem?"

"Sapphire," Heathspike said apathetically as he looked through Twilight's dresser drawers.

"Okay. . ." Spike said awkwardly, "Have you ever. . .met a phoenix?"

"I loathe them," Heathspike said in disgust, still not turning around to face Spike.

"Oh. . ." Spike said sadly, but then he got a sudden surge of confidence and said, "Listen, H.S.- uh, Heathspike! I've been living with ponies since I was born, and I don't really get along with other dragons. But I'd really like to. And, well, you're here with me and Twilight, so .. you know. . .you're a dragon, I'm a dragon, we're like brothers, you know. So I-"

Spike stopped suddenly when he noticed that not only was Heathspike not listening, but he also had armfuls of Twilight's things, among them were a Rubix cube, a book of crossword puzzles, and a sudoku book.

"What are you doing?" Spike asked.

"Getting rid of these horrid things before they harm the Princess," Heathspike said resolutely.

"What are you talking about? Put those things back!" Spike ordered.

"A Princess shouldn't have these things! I assume you put them there," Heathspike accused.

"I didn't put them there! Those are Twilight's! Now put them back, Trainee!" Spike said while pointed at the objects and back at the dwares.

Heathspike stuck his snout in the air and said snootily, "Just because I'm the Secondary Assistant doesn't mean I take orders from you!"

"Yes it does!"

"Out of my way, imbecile!"

"I don't know what that means, but it sounds like an insult!"

Spike suddenly pounced at Heathspike, and the two dragons were soon wrestling like crazy on the ground, kicking up a huge cloud of dust and sending the items flying across the room.

"ENOUGH!"

Spike and Heathspike were separated by Twilight's magical grip as the unicorn walked into the room. "What's going on here?"

"First of all, a Princess never raises her voice, Second of all, this ruffian attacked me for no reason!" Heathspike shouted indignantly.

"Nuh-uh! Prince Blueblood over there was stealing your stuff, Twi! Oh, and he called me a name too!" Spike complained.

Twilight groaned and lowered the two dragons to the ground. She then used her magic to gahter up the scattered objects, and then approached Heathspike and asked him, "Heathspike, were you taking my things?"

"But why on earth would you want them?" Heathspike asked in surprise.

"Because they're fun!" Twilight said with a chuckle as she brought the Rubix cube in front of her and began to work on it with her magic. Heathspike suddenly snatched the cube away from her and wagged a finger at her.

"Princesses don't solve hard puzzles," he said in the tone of a parent lecturing a child.

"What?" Twilight said flatly.

Heathspike stared at the cube reproachfully and said, "These tricky confusing things can really bend your brain and frustrate you! You can get a really bad headache from these things."

"Seriously?" Twilight said in a deadpan tone.

"Well, you see, H.S." Spike said with a frown, "Twilight can solve these things no problem, because unlike you, Twilight actually has a working brain!"

"Spike!" Twilight said in disdain.

"He started the whole thing!" Spike said while Heathspike shot him a death glare.

Twilight groaned and face hoofed yet again. She looked back and forth between the two little dragons and said, "Look, it's late. In fact, it's already time for bed." Twilight levitated out a bed basket from the doorway, "I brought out Spike's old bed for you, Heathspike. Now, you and Spike are going to sleep on opposite sides of the room. Hopefully by tomorrow you will have cooled down enough so that we can make a good impression when I introduce you to everyone else."

Heathspike sighed and bowed low, "As you wish, Princess Twilight."

"Give me one good reason why you just can't call her Twilight?" Spike complained.

"I'll give you three good reasons! 'Breeding,' 'manners,' and 'respect'!" Heathspike said haughtily.

Just then, the lights went out.

"Got to bed, you two!" Twilight called out in annoyance.

"A Princess never raises her voice!" Heathspike called out.

"Please go to bed. . ." Twilight muttered grumpily.

The Sun shone brightly over Ponyville, and Twilight Sparkle lay fast asleep in bed, comfortably under the warm covers.

CRASH!

"AHHH!" Twilight exclaimed as she jumped up into the air and bonked her head on the ceiling out of fright. She landed back on her bed, completely disoriented and dizzy from the whole ordeal. As she slowly regained her senses, she looked around to see that neither Spike nor Heathspike were in the room. Angry yelling also reached the young Princess' ears. "Oh, NO!" she gasped as she quickly got out of bed and ran downstairs towards the kitchen.

When she arrived, her jaw nearly hit the floor. Smashed eggs and slices of bread were everywhere. Heathspike had the kitchen table on it's side near the door and was bunkered behind it. He turned when he heard Twilight's hoof steps and gasped. "Princess! Get down! The ruffian seeks to destroy us!"

Spike's suddenly popped up from behind a barricade of chairs holding a toaster. "FOR EQUESTRIA!" Spike shouted as he jumped into the air, firing two slices of bread out of the toaster.

Heathspike's eyes widened as he quickly calculated that the projectiles would strike Twilight square in the chest. The entire world moved in slow motion as the blue dragon jumped into the air in front of Twilight Sparkle.

"Nnnnnnnooooooooooooooooo!" Heathspike shouted as he flew in front of Twilight and caught both pieces of toast in his chest. He landed on the ground on his side and let out a deep breath. "Only for you, my Princess. . ." he whispered as he held his tail up and waved the magical flower that was wrapped around it.

"What is going on here!?" Twilight shouted.

Heathspike suddenly sprang up onto his feet and said reproachfully with a wagging finger, "A Princess never raises her voice."

Spike ran over to Twilight looking mortified. "I'm so sorry, Twilight! I really am! But I can explain!" he cried as he fell to Twilight's hooves.

Twilight glared down at Spike. "Well, start explaining," she said sternly.

Spike sniffed and said, "It's just that I woke up early to make everyone breakfast. As a way of making things better from last night! I made all your favorites! French toast, hay-hash browns, and hardboiled eggs!"

At this, Twilight gaze softened, and she even managed a smile, "Wow, Spike. . .that's very sweet of you. . ." Then Twilight frowned, "But how did all of this happen?"

Spiked pointed directly at Heathspike, "He came down a few minutes after I started cooking. He said, 'I will not let you feed the Princess this garbage!' And he tossed the hay-hash browns in the garbage!" Tears sprang to his eyes as he went on, "Then I threw an egg at him, then he threw salt and pepper at me, and then there was syrup and powdered sugar and more eggs and it was just a huge mess! I'm so sorry!"

Twilight instinctively hugged Spike close and rubbed his back soothingly. "It's okay Spike. I understand. You really meant well."

Twilight turned to Heathspike and said in a calm tone, "Heathspike? Do you want to tell me your side of the story?"

Heathspike shrugged nonchalantly, "There's nothing to tell. What the ruffian says is true. It just pains me to think that you have lived for quite awhile being ignorant of two things." Heathspike held up one finger, "One: A Princess doesn't eat greasy food. Case and point, those wretched hay-hash browns." He held up two fingers, "And two: A Princess doesn't peel hardboiled eggs."

"Heathspike, where are you getting these rules from?" Twilight complained.

"Everyone knows these rules!" Heathspike exclaimed, "It's common knowledge and fact!"

"Since when are you 'everyone'?" Spike shot at the blue dragon.

"No fighting, please!" Twilight ordered, "Right now, this kitchen needs to be cleaned. And I've already overslept enough while you two were wasting food down here, so I'd say if you two get to work now, then we might be done by noon. Everypony will be waiting to meet you, Heathspike, so please, just stop fighting and start cleaning. Okay?"

Heathspike and Spike glared at each other for long tense moment. Then, they both sighed and shook claws.

"Good," Twilight said with a smile, "And I'll be watching." Twilight sat down on the floor.

"Ah-ah-ah-ah!" Heathspike said, wagging his finger in disapproval, "A Princess doesn't sit on the floor!"

The last time Twilight recalled sighing, groaning, and face hoofing so much was when Discord had corrupted her friends.

"Are you gonna help me clean, or not?" Spike complained.

"The Princess commanded it, so yes, I will help you, ruffian," Heathspike said with a smile as he grabbed a mop that was leaning against the wall."

Spike groaned. "Life sure just got a lot harder around here," he muttered.

That afternoon, Twilight and her two dragon assistants walked into the Hay Burger restaurant. They quickly made their way to the table where the rest of Twilight's friends were seated.

"There yer are, Twilight!" Applejack said with a wave.

Fluttershy gasped and quickly flew over to Heathspike and began fawning over him. "Ooh! So your new friend is another baby dragon! Ooh! How cute!"

Heathspike chuckled and looked away bashfully, "Heh-heh-heh. Well, I can't help it. . ."

"My, what a fabulous shade of blue you are!" Rarity said, and she gasped, "Ooh, and what a marvelous flower you have wrapped around your tail!"

Spike clenched his fists and his teeth. "Must - resist - urge - to - lash out in - jealous - rage!" he thought.

Twilight stood next to Heathspike and said, "Everypony. Meet Heathspike. A dragon whose destiny is to serve the Princess who picks his magic flower."

"Hi there, fella! I'm Applejack! From Sweet Apple Acres!" the farm pony said with a wave.

"Oh, I'm, Fluttershy. I like cute little animals," Fluttershy said timidly.

"I am Rarity! Ponyville's resident fashionista!" Rarity declared.

Heathspike blinked as something stirred in the back of his head, "Rarity. . ."

"Rainbow Dash here! Fastest pony in Equestria and soon to be member of the Wonderbolts!" Rainbow boasted.

"Rarity and Rainbow. . . those names. . ." Heathspike muttered to himself, but he was interrupted when a pink face suddenly popped in front of him, startling him so much that he fell over.

"Hi-hi-HI! I'm Pinkie Pie! Ooh! Ooh! We're gonna be super duper best friends, I know it! We can have a welcome to Ponyville party for you and everything!" said the hyperactive pink pony.

"Pinkie?" Heathspike said softly to himself, "Where have I-?"

Suddenly, Rarity pulled Pinkie away from him and said, "Now, Pinkie Pie! Give the poor thing room to breathe, for goodness sake! Now, how about we all sit down like civilized creatures, hmm?"

"Mm-hm! I like the way you think, my dear," Heathspike said as he got up off the ground.

Soon the six ponies and two dragons were all seated around the table, having a conversation about the new arrival.

"So, you were asleep for thousands of years? But you look the same age as Spike!" Rainbow Dash said.

"Well, considering the average size of a pony Princess, I doubt I could serve one adequately if I were the enormous size of an adult," Heathspike replied, but then he shrugged in his nonchalant fashion and said, "Either that or I don't age during my multi-millennial naps."

"Spike is probably happy to have another dragon around," Fluttershy said with a smile.

Spike gave a loud cough.

Heathspike narrowed his eyes.

Twilight smiled nervously.

"Uh. . .something wrong?" Applejack asked.

The potentially awkward moment was cut off when a server walked over and said, "May I take your orders now?"

Rainbow Dash opened her mouth, but a bang on the table from Heathspike silenced her.

"A Princess never goes second. . .or third. . .or fourth. . .or anything else but first!" the blue dragon demanded.

Rainbow shot Heathspike an angry glare. Twilight noticed the friction, and feared another fight. Not wanting that to happen, Twilight decided that she had better hurry up and order.

"Oh yes, I'll have two-"

"Princess Twilight will have one salad," Heathspike said confidently.

"HUH?" everypony and Spike said.

"Have you already forgotten?" Heathspike said with mild amusement, a smug smile on his face, "A Princess never eats greasy food!" Heathspike took a look at the menu and shook his head, "Hay burgers? Hay fries? I'm not completely sure what these things are, but if they're anything like those wretched hay-hash browns, then they're complete garbage!"

"HEY!" the server said, sounding quite offended.

Rainbow Dash flew across the table and came face to face with Heathspike. "What gives you the right to tell Twilight what she can and can't eat?"

"YEAH! Go Rainbow Dash! Woo-hoo!" Spike cheered.

"I must say, Heathspike, you are being quite rude here," Rarity remarked, sounded offended herself.

"You said it, Rares!" Spike said happily as he slid next to the white unicorn.

Heathspike humphed and prodded Dash in the nose, "Excuse me, but being a Princess' servant is my calling in life, and I'm sure the Princess' servant knows more than her lowly subjects!"

"Lowly subjects!?" Rarity exclaimed in shock.

"Now, see here!" Applejack said angrily, standing up with her front hooves on the table. "We ain't just her lowly subjects! We're her friends!"

Heathspike stared at Applejack, his only movement was the blinking of his eyes. But then, he smiled and began laughing uproariously.

Everyone in the restaurant stared at the the blue dragon who looked like he was about to explode with laughter. It was a miracle that he didn't fall out of his chair.

Pinkie was smiling and trembling with anticipation, "What's the joke! Come on, come on, tell me! I wanna laugh too!"

Heathspike eventually stopped laughing, and then brought his attention back to Applejack, who looked very annoyed at this point. The dragon ignored Applejack demeanor, leaned towards her, and said with his smuggest smile and most uppity tone:

"A Princess doesn't have friends."

The faces of everyone else sitting at that table would have been priceless under different circumstances. It was as if Heathspike had uttered some unspeakable obscenity in their presence. Even Pinkie Pie looked shocked. The silence around the table was at the levels of hearing a pin drop.

Heathspike raised an eyebrow. Why were these ponies so surprised by such an obvious fact? How long had they been deluded themselves? They didn't truly think they were friends with his precious Princess did they? And what did it matter to them anyway? What's so important about friendship?

"Take it back."

Heathspike's ear flaps perked up at the sound of Twilight's voice. He turned in his chair, and was surprised to see that Twilight looked quite angry.

"What was that, Princess?" Heathspike asked politely.

"Take it back," Twilight said again.

Heathspike raised his other eyebrow, "I'm sorry. I don't understan-"

"I SAID 'TAKE IT BACK'!" Twilight shouted angrily, "Take back what you said before about having friends!"

Heathspike blinked at Twilight's outburst, but then frowned and said, "A Princess never raises her voice!"

At that moment, the silence went from being able to hear a pin drop to being able to hear a feather drop. The rage on Twilight's face was so potent that even the Changeling Queen herself would be intimidated.

Spike, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Fluttershy all recognized the expression on Twilight's face, so they new what was coming next.

"HIT THE DIRT!" Spike shouted as he and the other three dived under the table, quickly pulling Rarity and Rainbow Dash down with them.

And then, at that moment, Twilight's hair burst into flames.

Heathspike's jaw dropped as he witnessed the frightening transformation before occurs before him. It was clear that he had angered a force that should not under any circumstances be angered.

Twilight's eyes were blood red, her fur and wings were a burning white color of a star, and her mane and tail were now raging fires. The other ponies in the restaurant either ran out in terror, took cover, or stood in awe and watched in silence.

And then, Twilight spoke.

"WE SPENT MANY A NIGHT WITH PRINCESS LUNA FOR LESSONS IN THE USE OF THE 'ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE,' ALTHOUGH WE DIDN'T THINK WE WOULD EVER NEED TO USE IT! UNTIL NOW!"

The blazing Alicorn pointed a hoof at the trembling blue dragon, whose claws were now digging deep into the chair.

"WE FOUND YOU ALONE AND BURIED IN DIRT! WE PICKED YOUR MAGICAL FLOWER, FREEING YOU FROM YOUR SLEEP! WE GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO LIVE LIFE! AND WHAT DID YOU DO? YOU TORMENTED OUR GOOD FRIEND SPIKE! YOU IMPOSED YOUR OWN SELFISH RULES UPON US! YOU INSULTED OUR PFFs. . .that's an acronym for 'Pony Friends Forever. . AND THEN YOU HAVE THE GAL! THE AUDACITY TO CLAIM THAT PRINCESSES DON'T HAVE FRIENDS, WHEN IT IS A FACT THAT IF IT WEREN'T FOR OUR FRIENDS! WE WOULDN'T EVEN BE A PRINCESS OR AN ALICORN!

Heathspike jaw was flapping up and down, as if he wanted to say something, but simply couldn't.

Princess Twilight Sparkle stood tall over the dragon, staring down at him with her red eyes, and she said, "KENBROTH GILSPOTTEN HEATHSPIKE, YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!"

Twilight's flaming hair shot up tall and raged more wild than ever. And then, in the twinkling of an eye, the flames died out, and Twilight's hair returned to it's normal state. Her eyes and coat color also returned to normal, leaving the purple Alicorn huffing and puffing, clearly out of breath from the dramatic display. Twilight's friends carefully came out of their hiding spot under the table, shocked at what they just witnessed. Truly this Princess held just as much power and authority as Celestia and Luna.

At that moment, Heathspike's chair fell over, and the blue dragon landed uncomfortably on the ground. Looking up at Twilight, he blinked his eyes as he got back up on his feet. He sighed as he reached behind him and took the flower off of his tail. He held it close to his chest and sighed.

"So. . ." he said, "This is the end. . .it just. . .wasn't meant to be."

Heathspike bowed respectfully to Twilight, then turned to her wide eyed friends. "This is my curtain call," he said with a sad smile. He then bowed low and elegantly to the group. "I am. . .so very sorry. . .goodbye. . ."

The blue dragon then got up, let out a loud, long moan, stumbled back a few paces, spun around twice, and then fell to the floor with a resounding thump, eyes closed, and claws still tightly gripping the sparkling flower, holding it over his chest.

As Twilight stared at the dragon, a great sense of guilt build up in her chest.

"What have I done?" she whispered in horror.

However, her tortured thoughts were interrupted by the sound of clapping. Everyone turned to see that it was Pinkie Pie giving the applause. She stopped applauding when she noticed everyone looking at her and said, "What? That was a great performance!"

Author's Note

Check out the MysteriousMrEnter's review of Princess Promenade! Link

Act Three

Heathspike lay down on a table in the library, the sparkling flower on his chest and a smile on his face. Pinkie Pie poked him gently in the side. "Heathspike? Yoo-hoo! Heathy? Wakey-wakey!"

Twilight pushed Pinkie Pie's hoof away and said frustratedly, "Pinkie, don't do that. He's not going to wake up." Twilight sighed, "Not for a few more thousand years."

"This is just stupid!" Rainbow Dash said, "He's probably just afraid to face the music for what he said."

Fluttershy put her hooves on Dash's shoulders and said sympathetically, "Oh, but the poor dear said he was sorry."

Rarity huffed, "Poor dear? Hmph! The uncouth little brat called us lowly subjects and questioned our friendship with Twilight."

"I still wish I hadn't gotten so frustrated. We could've worked something out," Twilight said sadly.

"Ah'm afraid I'm with Rarity on this one, Twi," Applejack said as she pointed at the unconscious dragon, "This feller's trouble! 'A Princess doesn't have friends,' huh! What a load of horse apples!"

"But maybe he was just confused!" Fluttershy said, "He was asleep for thousands of years after all. Maybe things were different long ago."

Twilight suddenly gasped as she was struck with a epiphany, "That's it!"

"What's it?" Spike asked.

"Luna was banished on the mood for 1000 years, and when she finally was freed and visited Ponyville on Nightmare Night, she wasn't sure how to act!" Twilight explained, "But after I taught her how to get along and have fun, everything was okay."

"So?" Rainbow Dash asked, not following along with what Twilight was trying to say.

"So, maybe all Heathspike needs is a few lessons in friendship," Twilight said brightly.

"I don't know, Twilight," Spike said nervously.

"I know Heathspike's been hard to live with," Twilight said honestly, "But look at it this way. If we don't help him, who will? Whoever wakes him up in a thousand or more years? Maybe yes, but maybe no" Twilight sighed, "As Princess, I am responsible for everyone in Equestria, and that includes Heathspike. I can tell that he's a good dragon inside, and I'm more than willing to try and bring it out."

Everyone else looked at Twilight, who sounded very much certain about what she was saying.

"Well, I'll be," Applejack said, then she smiled, "Ain't that the Twilight we all know and love!"

"If anyone can mold him into the perfect gentle dragon, it's our Twilight!" Rarity said.

"And then we can have that PARTY!" Pinkie cheered as she did a cartwheel around Heathspike.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll believe the guy can change when I see it," Rainbow Dash said unenthusiastically.

Fluttershy hugged Twilight softly and said, "Oh, thank you Twilight! You won't be sorry!"

"Well, this should be easier than when Fluttershy reformed Discord, at least," Spike remarked.

Twilight walked over to Heathspike and put a hoof on the flower in his claws. "Heathspike," Twilight said, "This is Princess Twilight here. I . . .I'm sorry for getting so angry and. . . firing you like I did. That was a mistake. I would still like for you to assist me. It's very important that you wake up. . .Please?"

Heathspike didn't move a muscle.

Twilight sighed, "Oh well. . .Spike, make us all a great big batch of hay-hash browns!"

Heathspike suddenly sat up so fast it looked as if he was propelled by a coiled spring. "A Princess doesn't eat greasy food!" he exclaimed in repulsion.

"Oh brother," Rainbow Dash remarked with a roll of her eyes.

"Does that mean you'll serve me?" Twilight asked.

Heathspike did his uncaring shoulder shrug and said, "I might as well, if you need me so much-."

"Stop right there, Heathspike," Twilight said, holding a hoof out to make him stop, "The fact is that we need each other. That's how friendship works."

"Ah, yes. Friendship," Heathspike said with a solemn nod, "I'm honestly not sure why friendship is so important to you."

Twilight smiled and said, "Well, don't worry, because I intend to show you why." Twilight's horn flashed, a Heathspike was suddenly buried in a huge pile of scrolls. He burst out of the pile, gasping for air as he looked at all the scrolls with wide eyes.

"If you really are a good Princess' servant, then you'll read all of my Friendship Reports, all of them, and then write a 1000 word essay on the Magic of Friendship," Twilight declared.

Rainbow Dash flew next to Applejack and whispered into her ear, "Betcha a milkshake he says no or tries to get out of it."

"As you wish, Princess Twilight! I live to serve!" Heathspike said with a dutiful salute.

Dash's mouth dropped open as Applejack just smirked at her.

The next day, everyone gathered together in the Library to hear Heathspike read his essay.

". . .therefore, it is clear that with help from your friends, you can do amazing things. Even become a Princess. The end!" Heathspike concluded with a smile as he looked up from the sheet of paper covered on both side with inked writing.

The small audience all stomped in applause, although Spike just clapped and Pinkie Pie cheered wildly and shot confetti into the air out of her Party Cannon.

"Very good, Heathspike!" Twilight said, "Aside from putting 'the end' in your essay, I'd say you did an excellent job."

Heathspike bowed respectfully, "A thousand thank yous, Princess. I believe I have learned quite a lot from your and your friends' Friendship Reports." He smiled sheepishly, "Perhaps the old rules of Princesshood have gone through a few changes. Perhaps one can be a good Princess while at same time enjoying life and. . .just being herself."

"I'm glad you see it that way," Twilight said, finally feeling truly triumphant.

Rainbow Dash cracked a smile, "Eh. I guess the kid's alright."

"Anybody can be a real sweetheart once you get to know him," Fluttershy said happily.

"Well hang on there, sugarcube. Ah wouldn't go as far as to say anybody" Applejack commented with a nervous laugh.

"Oh, Applejack, don't be a wet blanket. I'd say the little fellow is making great progress," Rarity said.

Heathspike nodded, "Why thank you, ma'am. Now, how may I serve you, Princess Twilight?" he asked dutifully.

Twilight gave a quick sidelong glance to Spike, who returned a quick wink and a nod. Twilight looked back at the blue dragon and said, "You and Spike can categorize, organize, and catalog that pile of Friendship Reports." She pointed at the pile of scrolls that lay against the far wall.

Heathspike blinked, took a quick glance at Spike, and then nodded, "Very well, your Majesty."

As everypony left the Library, Rainbow Dash flew close to Twilight and hovered next to her. "Are you sure it's a good idea to leave Spike alone with that other guy? I mean, just because he understands friendship doesn't mean he'll wanna be friends with Spike."

"Don't worry," Twilight assured, "Spike and I had a long talk about this, and I'm sure Spike will really bond with him, and they'll be as close as two little brothers. Now let's go. I have a huge craving for some hay burgers right now!"

At first, the two dragons were silent as they shifted through all the scrolls, deeply focused on their appointed task. Eventually, Spike decided to break the ice.

"So. . ." he began, "I kinda understand why you had all those rules. I mean, you were only trying to look out for Twilight."

"Hmm," Heathspike said.

"I'm not upset about those fights we had anymore."

"Hmm."

"They're really the kind of things you look back and laugh at, right? Heh-heh!"

"Hmm."

"I mean, the way we had arguments and rough little fights and misadventures, it's almost as if we're bro-"

"AH-HA! Here it is!" Heathspike said as he pulled out a scroll and opened it, "This is the one you wrote about the time you were jealous of that owl and were afraid of getting replaced by him."

"Hoo!" Owlicious hooted loudly, his eyes glaring hard at Heathspike.

Spike blushed with embarrassment and chuckled, "Well, yeah. But I should've known better. Twilight would never replace me!"

"Hmm," Heathspike said again, but then he smiled mischievously and said, "And yet here I am."

Spike groaned, "Come on, Heathspike. Don't start. Aren't we all friends here?"

Heathspike raised an eyebrow, "You don't feel threatened with my being here?"

"Nope!" Spike said confidently.

"You don't fear that I might become the one who does everything Princess Twilight while you do nothing?" Heathspike asked suspiciously.

"That's not gonna happen," Spike said brightly.

"'Not gonna hap-'" Heathspike echoed in shock before his voice trailed off. His jaw flapped up and down before he got up in a huff and stomped the ground hard. "NO! No-no-no! Spike, you are just too naive!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Spike asked in surprise.

"'Showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judg-'"

"No, I know what naive means! I meant, what are you talking about?"

Heathspike shook his head sadly, "Fine. Let me spell it out for you. From what I read about the importance of friendship in this land, and with how long you and Twilight have been friends, it's quite obvious that my days up and about in Ponyville are seriously numbered."

"Huh?!" Spike said in shock.

"Princess Twilight Sparkle simply does not need two assistants!" Heathspike said while spreading his arms wide, "She'd never get rid of you, so she'd obviously dismiss me!"

"Whoa! Calm down H.S,- uh, Heathspike!" Spike said as he motioned with his claws to calm down.

"H.S. is fine actually," the blue dragon said gloomily.

"Oh," Spike said in surprise, but then he shook off the shock and said, "Well, look, Twilight can use two assistants."

"But you don't want that, do you?" Heathspike said, "You've been her faithful assistant for so long. If I were you, I'd be feeling quite bad about this whole thing. The role of a Princess' Assistant is sacred, and quite hard to share willingly."

Spike faltered a bit at this. The truth was, he still wasn't completely sold on the idea of having another dragon assistant around. I'ts been him and Twilight for so long, it didn't feel right to him to have another assistant in the Library. "H.S., where is this coming from, anyway?" Spike asked.

Heathspike folded his arms and pouted, "Alright, you want to know? Fine then! I'm not happy here, okay! Twilight is just not my kind of Princess! She lives in a Library in a tree in a small town! Where's the palace, for goodness sake! And it's clear that Twilight is not the highest of Princesses. Your Celestia and Luna are the main rulers, they're the ones with the castle and the glamour, and they already have plenty of aides, servants, and assistants!" Heathspike let out a long exaggerated sighed and hung his head, "The responsibilities Twilight has only really requires one faithful assistant that understands her. A true, true friend, as it were. A friend with years of experience with her. That's you, Spike. Not me. Fact is, the only reason I'm going along with this is because there's no other Princess to serve, and I just don't want to fall back into my enchanted sleep if I don't have too. If I knew where I could find my kind of Princess, I would do anything to get her to pick my flower instead of the Princess of Books. Um. . .no offense. . .!" the blue dragon let out another exaggerated sigh, "But I suppose it won't be long before I have to return to sleep again anyway."

"But-" Spike began, but Heathspike cut him off.

"No Spike. . ." he said seriously as he dramatically placed a claw over his heart, "It'll be for the best." Heathspike looked around the library and snorted smoke out of his nostrils, "At least then I'll be able to leave all this dullness behind me. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get some juice, or chocolate milk, or something sweet."

Spike watched his blue counterpart walk off into the kitchen. He stared hard at the closed door, lost in deep thought. Then, the answer struck him suddenly. "That's it!" he said, and he quickly ran out the front door.

Heathspike finished his third glass of chocolate milk, and fifth doughnut from the box on the counter, and sighed his extra long sigh a third time. "Well, I'd better get back to work for Princess Scholar," he said as he pushed open the kitchen door. To his surprise, he found Twilight and Spike in the room, waiting for him.

"Heathspike, we need to talk," Twilight said seriously.

Everyone was gathered on the outskirts of Ponyville, in a grassy field on which the girls often had their picnics. Everyone was gathered around Heathspike to say their goodbyes.

"We know you'll be much happier when you wake up," Fluttershy said with a smile.

"Ya seem like you'd be a good worker once ya get your heart into it. I'm sure you'll find your place," Applejack said.

"It's just such a wonderful thought! A tale worthy of a novel! A young soul in search for a perfect Princess for him to swear his allegiance too!" Rarity practically sang.

"Ya better make sure they throw you a good waking up party!" Pinkie Pie warned playfully.

"And no being a jerk!" Rainbow Dash warned seriously.

Heathspike chuckled and said, "Princess, you certainly do have a colorful collection of interesting friends. His eyes glazed over, "They seem so familiar. . ." Then he shook that thought out of his head and said, "Anyway, I can't thank you enough for understanding. I was afraid that the truth might offend you."

Twilight shook her head and smiled good naturedly, "Oh no, I understand completely. Spike is the perfect assistant for me, and this is the perfect life for him. You just need to find yours, and I'm 100 percent positive that you will. Just promise-"

"Pinkie Promise!" Pinkie demanded sharply.

"Pinkie Promise that you won't forget about the Magic of Friendship, and try to be more reasonable in your attempts to assist your Princess."

Heathspike nodded and held out the scroll on which he had written his 1000 word essay. "Oh, I doubt I'll ever forget as long as I have this. But nevertheless. . .um. . .how do you-" Pinkie whispered the directions into his ear. He smiled in understanding and nodded. "Alright then. Cross my heart and hope to fly. Stick a cupcake in my eye," he said as he went through all the motions.

"Good!" Pinkie said, looking satisfied.

Spike walked over to the blue dragon, looking slightly nervous. "We. . haven't been on the best terms during the time you've been here. So. . .well. . ." Spike took a large blue sapphire out from behind his bag and handed it to Heathspike. "Friends?"

With wide eyes, Heathspike took the gem and stared at it in awe. He then looked up at Spike's worried and slightly guilty face. Heathspike smiled, broke the gem in half, and handed one of the halves back to Spike.

"Brothers," he said sincerely.

Spike's eyes shot open wide, and his heart began to thump harder. "Y-y-you mean it?"

Heathspike nodded.

As Spike's heart rate returned to normal, a huge smile grew on his face as he took the half of the gem. "Brothers!" he cheered, and the two dragons clicked their pieces together in a toast, and the tossed the delicious morsels into their mouths.

"Ahhh. . ." Heathspike sighed contentedly after he chewed and swallowed. He then brought the magic flower to his chest, held it in his claws, closed his eyes, and fell back onto the cool soft grass with a quiet thump.

Making new friends is always great, but it's not always easy. Everyone is different, meaning that you'll occasionally come across someone that has different beliefs than you do, or thinks differently than you do, or are even used to a way of life completely different than yours. And also, everyone has their own unique place in the world, and sometimes the calling of one friend will take them away from you. It may be sad at first, but a true friend always puts the wishes of their friend above their own, and sees them off with a smile as they achieve the joy and fulfillment of finding their one true place in the world. And that is something we should always support, and never hinder.

After all, it's not like we won't be seeing H.S. again soon!

-Twilight Sparkle
-Spike

After they finished their entry in the Friendship Journal, Spike said to Twilight, "Okay, what now?"

Twilight smiled slyly and motioned to the pile of Friendship Reports yet to be sorted.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot," Spike said with a sheepish smile.

Twilight laughed and said, "Come on, let's do it together. I've been wanting to read through them and reminisce about the times we've all had for quite a while."

Although the blue dragon couldn't move, speak, see, or even truly think about what was happening or where he was; he could most certainly hear as the earth around him moved and shook.

"'. . .just make sure that you, and only you, are the one who picks the flower. I'm positive this will be just what you need. Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle,'" said a mare's voice.

"Some kind of magic flower, huh? I wonder what it does?" came a stallion's voice.

"Well, it's Twilight, so it has to be good. Here I go!" the mare's voice said in a giddy cheerful tone.

The moment he felt the stem get tugged free of his claws, his consciousness returned to him in an instant. Then he burst out of the purple soil inside of the large orange planter pot, which had been sitting inside of a slightly taller cardboard box marked fragile to keep the flower save and undamaged.

When the dragon opened his eyes and looked straight up, his breath was taken away. Crystal! Beautiful, blue, elegant crystal! He looked behind him, and gasped when he beheld the magnificent architecture of the room and the other buildings outside. Everything was made out of the gorgeous crystal, and arches and towers were everywhere. On the floor was a red royal carpet, and the design of the windows, pillars, and banners just screamed 'Royal Palace.'

And then, he turned back around.

His eyes fell upon a creature of incredible beauty. Sparkles danced around in his vision as he took a long moment to admire the pink alicorn, her lovely hair cascading down alongside her face, her entire form commanding a kind of beauty, elegance, and grace that the frumpy Twilight Sparkle did not have.

"My Princess!" he thought, "Look at that poise! Look at that form! Oooh! Look at that figure! I'm sure she doesn't eat greasy foods! . . .but if she wanted to. . . on occasion, I wouldn't be pushy about it, I'm sure it wouldn't hurt. But I'm sure she's the type of Princess who appreciates a good salad. . .Wait, is her mouth moving? Oh goodness me, she's saying something to me! Okay, stay focused."

The blue dragon shook off his daze brought on by enchantment and focused on what he was seeing. The pink alicorn had a gentle smile on her face, and was bending down slightly so that she was at eye level with the little dragon. Standing next to her was a white unicorn with a dark mane wearing a uniform. The dragon assumed that he was a prince, although he noticed that the Prince was eyeing him suspiciously, a strong contrast to the warm inviting gaze of the Princess.

"I said, who are you, little one?" Princess Cadence repeated a little louder, but still in a kind tone.

The dragon cleared his throat, jumped out of the box, dusted himself off a bit, and said with a bow, "Kenbroth Gilspotten Heathspike. At your service, your Majesty!"

THE END