Too Sexy for Equestri(a)

by PenileCorrectionSurgery

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Other
Length: 4031

Michael is an ordinary man, but when his country goes bad and rejects him, he must find a new one.

Sometimes, things may not end how you intend them to end, and sometimes this ending is better than the ending that you had put the planning into. when a man with the name of Michael is mistaken for something that he is not, he is moved to Equestria where every person is a pony and there are no human beings. In this land he learns many new things that the people in his home could be better if they also learned them.

Published 2014-04-06 03:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-09-15 19:15:06 UTC

Things do not go along with plans

Author's Note

Hello this is my story please do not be too bad to me I am not using my first language thank you please rate and comment etc. :)

Things do not go along with plans

“Bring.” Said the alarm clock. “Bring bring.”

Michael heard the alarm clock, but decided against his better judgement that he should ignore it and continue to be asleep in his comfortable bed. He rolled over onto the other side of his body in order to remain feeling the comforting warmth of his bed. Michael was happy.

“Bring.” The alarm clock continued, regardless.

“ok alarm clock.” sighed Michael. “I shall awaken now to prevent your continued noise making.”

Michael stood up from his comfortable bed and pressed the off button on the alarm clock. It stopped making the bringing noise that it had been previously. Michael was feeling a little bit groggy in the mornings, and was still tired from his recently stopped sleeping. He looked at his clothes on the floor that he now had to put on, and considered that it would be more comfortable to return to his sheets and pillows that were so nice to him previously. Michael promptly stopped thinking of this occurrence as he remembered that he must be arriving at work on time in order for him to remain at his job, which he required for money to buy his food etc.

With his clothes on, the same clothes that he had been wearing the day before, as he had not had any other ones cleaned in time for today, Michael went into his bathroom in order for him to wash his face and to clean his teeth with a brush. This prevented him from being unable to interact with the other people, as he did not have bad teeth and breath any more. Following this occurrence, Michael went through the hall to the next room of his flat in order to collect his items together that he would need for his work day today. These items included papers, mobile telephone etc.

Michael left out of the front lobby of the flat that he lived in and onto the road beyond in order for him to catch as bus towards his desired location, which was his place of work. He worked at a small telephone marketing company in which people in employment by the company would contact others in their homes in the hope of persuading them to spend their money on an item or service. Michael did not enjoy his job very much as he found it boring and he did not receive a large amount of money, although he did enjoy the money which he made by working at the job. Michael considered this fact and thought about how that was what life was like for many people in the world.

At the bus stop, there were a number of people already waiting for the same bus that Michael was. He stood among them and looked at the things which they were doing. Some of them were on their telephones, communicating with others in another location, others were simply sitting in quiet reading or looking around like michael himself. He looked back at the large, grey box that was the tower in which he was living, and considered it. He looked at the very old and dusty Moskvitch automobile parked close to the tower, and thought about them both. He wondered what it would have been like for the people living in the past in this region, when there were bad men in charge who weren’t voted for and these towers and cars were being made.

In a short period of time, the bus arrived at the bus stop as was scheduled and the waiting people got onto it to get to their respective places of work. Michael, being one of the above people, also entered the bus at this point. several of the people on the bus started to give Michael unusual looks on their faces, and he could not think of why they may have been doing such a thing. He smiled back at them to try to make a more friendly atmosphere but they apparently did not want such a thing, as they looked in other directions when this occurred. Michael was feeling quite perplexed at this situation, but felt too afraid to ask a person for the reasons for it happening.

After some time, the bus got closer into the centre of the town in which Michael lived, and the traffic got quite full of automobiles in every direction. The bus was having trouble to move forwards towards its destination at all. Being quite close to his place of work, Michael asked the driver of the bus politely if he would be able to get off at this point, despite that it was not a bus stop area. The driver said that it was fine and allowed Michael to exit the bus, but he was giving him the same unusual look that the passengers of the bus were giving him. Michael disliked this. Now free from the bus, he made his walking speed be increased by an amount in order for him to arrive before the time in which he would be considered late.

Michael burst into his workplace moments before the correct time had passed and notified his boss that he had indeed arrived on time. He walked over to his small cubicle area and breathed deeply from the large amount of effort that he had put in to get here at the right time. He looked at the computer screen which was in front of his face and considered how it was old and did not always work as intended. This made Michael frustrated at times with the computer. He logged in with his correct name and pass-word and started up the program of telephoning people. He could hear the other people in his area doing the same thing. The work was only quite small, with around 20 or so people working for it. Michael was aware that some of these places had many more people working in them at a time.

After many unsuccessful telephone calls, Michael stopped for a while in order for him to rest and to have a small cup of water from the supplied cooling machine near the telephoning area. While he was drinking his water and considering things, Michael heard that his boss was approaching him from behind and wished for his attention.

“Michael.” The boss said, “I have a piece of work that I would like you to do, it will allow you to have a time of not doing the telephoning.”

Michael turned around to face his boss and answer his offer. “Of course, boss. I will do th-”

He was cut from speaking by an interjection from the boss. “Oh for the sake of God, Michael!” He shouted. “I have said to you on many occasions that you must not be wearing homosexual clothing when you are at work, I consider it to be of offense.”

“But sir,” began michael to defend himself from the bosses hurtful words. “I am not a homosexual, I just want to watch the American show “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic”, not have sex with other males!”

“I do not care for your excuses Michael,” the boss returned. “I will have to let you leave for doing this on multiple occasions. I cannot employ homosexuals.”

“But-” Said Michael, but it was too late. Michael had been fired. He now understood why all of the people on the bus had been looking at him unusually - they believed him to be a homosexual and therefore did not want to be associated. He could not think how he could have missed that the rainbow on the character “Rainbow Dash” could have meanings of homosexuality. He looked down at the blue pony on his shirt and was sad. This was the end of Michael being able to make himself money to pay for his rent; he thought about how he may now have to not have a home and be instead living like the poor people on the roads in news papers. He was scared.

Michael wanted to not be involved with other people on the way to be leaving to go back to his home, as as such decided it would be best to take a way home that was free mostly of people to think of him as a homosexual. He found a small alleyway and went down into it, as it was leading in the direction that he wished to go into.

Very soon, Michael found himself to not know where he was. The buildings around him were large and prevented him from being able to see where he was located, this made Michael feel anxious as he was not protected from attack. He began to consider that it may have been a better choice to have tot decided to return to his home through this route. Up ahead, a group of men spilled out from a doorway. They had many tattoos on their skins and their hair was cut in such a way that it was very short so that it almost wasn’t there. The men laughed a lot and appeared to have drunk too much alcohol before being here. They made Michael feel uncomfortable so he made attempts to not be seen by any of them, but it did not work.

One of the men turned around and saw Michael standing in the centre of the alley. He made a face that showed disgust and pointed to Michael so his friends were also aware that he was there. “What are you doing in this area, homosexual?” He said in an unfriendly voice which made Michael feel like things were not going a good way.

“You are not welcome here.” Another one of the men said.

“It is not safe for homosexuals such as you in this place.” A third man entered the conversation.

“I apologise for this mistake.” Michael said in a broken way. “I will be leaving now as you wish.” He turned around to go away and was prepared if he needed to to run away from the men.

“I do not think that that will be happening.” Laughed a man from behind.

The group began to come towards Michael in a threatening manner and as such he attempted to flee the area, but the men were too fast and they were also strong. They attacked Michael with a lot of force and they kicked and punched him until he bled. He bled from many areas such as his mouth and nose. The men kept shouting while they were kicking at Michael. they told him about his homosexuality. Michael felt unhappy because he was being attacked for being a homosexual when he was in fact not one. He wished that he had not worn this shirt today as it had made much trouble.

While the men were still kicking at Michael in his stomach and groin regions, a bright flashing of light appeared behind them. Michael saw it from behind his eyelids and decided to open his eyes in order to see what the light was. He saw the character “Princess Celestia” from the My Little Pony television programme. The magical alicorn pony then shot at all the bad men and the men fell to the ground as they had been killed by the pony.

“Hello Michael” Said Princess Celestia as she walked over to where Michael was lying down in the birt and blood that was on the ground. “Quickly, you must come with me as we leave to the Equestrian world, or you will be dead.”

Michael made attempts to crawl towards the pony but he had been made very weak and could not achieve this. As such, Princess Celestia picked him up with her golden glow of magic and placed his injured self onto her back. Michael saw another bright flashing light beam before all the world disappeared from his view. The world had become black and gone.

To be continued

Things become different and unusual

Author's Note

Upon seeing that this particular publication has a new, and somewhat interesting comment, it returned to my memory that this story does in fact exist, and it also reminded me that I had written a second chapter that went unpublished due to my lack of interest. In any case, here it is.

Things become different and unusual

“Hello.” Said a voice from beyond what Michael could sense. “Hello, please awaken.”

Michael was very tired and weakened although he could not remember why he would feel this way, as he was drowsy.

“Hello.” Said the voice again.

Michael wished that he could turn the voice off like he could do with his alarm clock, but he assumed that the voice belonged to a person and people were unable to be turned off. As he became more awake, Michael thought that maybe he could stop the voice from making noise if he could do as was asked of him by the voice. This meant that he must awaken from his sleeping in order for the voice to stop as an alarm clock would. Michael opened his eyes.

As his eyes were opened to see what was around him, Michael considered that the world seemed much more simple than what he had remembered it being. He thought about this and decided that it must have been the light causing things to appear differently. He then noticed that everything was more colourful than it was before. Michael considered this and decided that this was caused by a co-incidence and that it no longer needed to be thought about. Next was the time to find out who the person that was attempting to awaken him was in order for him to prevent the continuing of the noise which he found unpleasant while he was in a state of tiredness. He turned his head and what he saw made him be extremely surprised, as it was the character “Twilight Sparkle” from the television show “My little Pony Friendship is Magic”.

“Twilight Sparkle.” Michael said in a surprised manner. “You are not in fact a real person. Indeed, you are not a person at all! You are a pony. This is not the only issue however, as you are not in existence and so I cannot be seeing you. This leads me to believe that some trickery has occurred!”

“Please be calm, as I am able to explain to an extent why it is that you are here.” Twilight Sparkle began to speak. “As I was learning from my teacher Princess Celestia about types of magic which I do not yet understand, she was showing me a spell which allows a pony to look across from a world into a different world. As it happens, the world into which we were looking was your world. We saw you in your world but you were not in a good situation, as many men were attacking you without any provocation. This occurrence prompted me to request of Princess Celestia to intervene in the situation. She was reluctant but eventually I had managed to convince her to rescue you from the men attacking you and instead bring you to this location. One of the conditions for your rescue however was that I am responsible for your care until you may return to your own world.”

“Thank you for explaining this to me.” Michael responded. “I remember now Princess Celestia rescuing me from the men. But Twilight Sparkle, how is it that I am not injured as I once was?”

“That is due to my magical spells repairing your various wounds.” Twilight Sparkle said.

Michael nodded his head as he understood that unicorn ponies such as Twilight Sparkle were in fact capable of performing magical spells in order to complete a number of different tasks. “but Twilight Sparkle, are you aware that this world is in fact a television programme in which your friends and yourself complete tasks and adventure?”

“I am indeed aware Michael, although that is not really true. In reality the creator of the television programme was transported here some time ago and decided that she would make a television programme in which the characters were based upon the characters of myself and of my friends.”

“I see.” Said Michael, considering this new amount of information being given to him. He was in fact still unsure of the situation, due to it being extremely unusual for him.

The two beings continued to sit in a sense of quietness for some time, unsure of what it is that they should do next. “What should we do next?” Asked Michael eventually, looking at Twilight Sparkle.

“We should go to the cake shop in the village in order to meet my friends, who you are already in acquaintance with due to the watching of the television program including them.” Replied Twilight Sparkle, standing to her feet and beginning to walk out of the room that they were sitting in.

Michael struggled but eventually he managed to stand to his feet also, and begin to follow his purple host out into the outside world that was in fact new to him. As Michael reached the doorway he leaned on the side and attempted to shade his eyes from the sun that seemed bright to him due to being asleep in a dim room for quite some time.

When his eyes were adjusted to the light levels of this new outside world, Michael could finally look around him to see what it was like in this area. He saw that there was a cobbled road leading past the doorway and that it led to various other houses made in the old-fashioned style of having wooden support beams with white walls and roofs made from straw. Michael considered that these houses would set on fire quite readily in the right circumstances. Further down the road there appeared to be a particularly brightly coloured house which he recognised from his favourite television programme: it was the home of “Pinkie-Pie”, the pink pony who had many cakes and was host to a selection of parties etc.

“Come.” Said Twilight Sparkle to Michael. “We are in fact going to the confectionery-styled house in which Pinkie-Pie resides.” She began to walk down the street. As Michael followed her clumsily from his drowsiness, he began to notice that the bright ponies around him were looking strangely. It occurred to him that although he was familiar with their world, they may not have been accustomed to seeing a human being walking down their road.

“Hello my friends!” Michael proclaimed to the various ponies standing around him. “Fear not, for I am in your world in a peaceful manner.” This seemed to calm the ponies somewhat, although they remained suspicious due to their unfamiliarity with the tall and pale human creature.

Shortly, Twilight Sparkle and Michael arrived at the front door of the cake shop and entered it. Within there were shelves filled with various confectionery such as cup-cakes and many types of sugary sweets assured to make children active and to taste delicious. Michael looked at them and wished to eat them, however he could not as they were for sale only and it would be unfair of him to steal what was not his.

Michael’s thieving thoughts were cut short as Twilight Sparkle's various friends and associates came around the corner in order to see who had arrived in the cake shop. Upon finding that it was their friend, the ponies looked happy, for Twilight Sparkle was a pony that they enjoyed to spend time with. Back at home, Michael did not have many friends and as such he envied Twilight Sparkle somewhat, but remained happy. Hopefully he would be able to make friends with these ponies, as he had thought from the television that they were in fact quite nice and that friendship was an important factor in their existence. Maybe Michael would not be alone for much more time at all.

“Twilight Sparkle, welcome!” Exclaimed Pinkie-Pie as she moved forward in order to embrace her friend, as she was inclined to do. Having done this, the pink pony considered Michael and then looked back to Twilight Sparkle. “What is this unusual creature that has travelled here along with you?” She asked.

“This is a human being.” Twilight Sparkle announced to all of her friends. “He has travelled here from a long way away in order to be safe, and I am responsible for his care.”

“What an oddity!” Flutter Shy cheered as she flew gracefully towards him. “You are indeed very interesting. I have in fact never seen a creature resembling you in all of my life as an animal carer.”

“Hello Flutter Shy.” Michael said. It was his intention to continue with an introduction of himself to the ponies but his efforts were cut short by the yellow pony flying away from him rapidly and hiding behind a chair.

“I was unaware that you were able to speak.” Flutter Shy said from her hiding place. “Also, how is it that you can know who I am, has Twilight Sparkle told you?”

“No.” Michael responded, “I know your name as I am a viewer of a television programme back in my old country in which you are all characters. This is how I know who you are.”

“This is the reason that you wear clothing featuring myself?” Rainbow Dash asked, raising her foreleg in order to point out the graphic printed onto Michael’s t-shirt. “I must compliment you on excellent taste my friend!” She continued.

“Yes well it is unfortunate that my fellow human beings back at home do not feel the same way.” Michael unhappily responded. “As a matter of fact, this very shirt is the reason why it was necessitated for myself to be transported to your world, as I do not come here because of good circumstances.”

“My apologies for my image causing you these issues um… what was your name again?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Michael.” Came the short response.

“Well Michael, I apologise for this issue, despite the fact that I would have been unable to have stopped it.” the blue pony said.

“There is no need to apologise, for it is not you ponies here in Equestria who I blame for the circumstance, but the very people who attacked me for not only bad reasons, but false ones too.” Michael looked sadly towards the ponies. “I was attacked and almost killed, friends, for wearing these rainbow colours. This is due to the fact that in my home country the rainbow is representative of the homosexuals, who are very much frowned upon for their actions in my home. I am not a homosexual however, so I felt even more injusticed for my attacks.”

“There is no reason to be upset, Michael my friend. You are safe from such attacks here.” Apple Jack said in an effort to comfort Michael. She walked towards him and put her foot on his shoulder. “Not only do we accept homosexuals in this country, but we do not persecute any particular group of people, unless they are attempting to cause harm to others in some way.”

“Thank you, Apple Jack. That is a nice thing to know. As a matter of fact I do not think I would enjoy to return home at all after discovering that this world is such an enjoyable place!” Michael considered how such a bad situation that he had been in before had ended up so well. This is when it occurred to him that this may have been some sort of fever dream, or even death. At this point though, he did not mind.

“Come, Michael.” Apple Jack said. “You may stay with my family until you have somewhere of your own, for we have plenty of space.”

“Thank you, Apple Jack.” He responded. “That would be very good indeed.”