Chapters My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Hi, my name is Autora. Previously known as Derrick Doo. I have a greenish-grey coat, and short, sort of neon yellow mane. I had totally different colors before, but I surgically changed them as to not get confused as The living Tombstone.
I live in Ponyville, and am a part of the Brony Dance Party team. I am currently single, and have helped Vinyl Scratch, AKA DJ pon3, remix songs and such.
My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Chapter two: hearts and hooves day
I walked down the familiar abandoned street in Canterlot. It was hearts and hooves day, the pony equivalent of Valentine’s day, and everypony had a very special somepony, even Derpy, except for me. I spotted my old friend who recently quit the Dance party team, H_8 seed!
“Hey, H_8 Seed!” I shouted to him. He turned around, his hoof-made metal wings covered with dust.
Excited to see me, he opened his wings and flew towards me.
“Autora, old buddy, old pal!” he said. “How have you been lately?”
“Good,” I replied, “A bit lonely, nopony wants to be my ‘very special somepony’,”
H_8 shrugged. “Same with me. But you know what I bet?”
“What?”
“I bet that Ashcorp already slept with half of them.”
I nodded. “That’s a fair bet.”
Ken Ashcorp was the newest addition to the Dance Party Team. He is a red pony with a blonde mane, and his cutie mark was, oddly and ironically, three hearts.
“Well,” said the grey Pegasus, “see you around.”
“See ya,” I said, and left.
I walked to sugar cube corner to get a box of doughnuts for me and Dinky. As I walked into the store, Pinkie Pie greeted me with her usual energetic self.
“Hi, Autora,” she said, “happy hearts and hooves day! Who the lucky--”
I stopped her there. “Nopony,” I said. “I just came to get a dozen doughnuts.”
In a pink flash, pinkie got a box of sugar and jelly doughnuts, and brought them to me. For an Earth pony, she was fast. I paid her the 10 bits, including the tip, and left. “Bye, Pinkie!”
When I got home, I was surprised to see Trixie walking up to my door.
“Hey, Trixie,” I said to the blue unicorn, “how are you?”
“Good,” she said. She had gotten over calling herself “the Great and Powerful Trixie” a few months ago. “I know it’s a bit late, but I came to ask if you would be my very special somepony.”
I was speechless. If I knew Trixie well enough, she wouldn’t ask ANYpony what question unless she had real feelings for them.
“Uuhhh…” I hesitated, “sure!”
“Great!” Trixie said. “Let’s go!”
“Hold on,” I said, “I have to do something real quick.”
I rushed inside, left the doughnuts and a note for Derpy, and went back outside.
“Alright,” I said. “Let’s go.”
We walked around Ponyville, we had a nice lunch and shared a shake at one of the fancy restaurants in town, and went to Trixie’s house.
It was nice place, though relatively small. She walked me to her bedroom. I knew what she wanted. She used her magic to push me onto the bed, and climbed on top of me.
After about an hour, I walked back to my place. The door was locked, so I assumed that Derpy was home. I knocked on the door, and a brown stallion with a black mane opened the door. Alongside him was Derpy.
“Ah,” said the stallion, “You must be Autora. I‘m Dr. Whooves.”
We shook hooves. Dr. Whooves stepped aside so I could enter my house.
“Autora,” said Dinky, “what happened to your hair?”
I chuckled. “Trixie happened.” And with that, I went to my room and fell asleep.
My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Chapter 4: Weeping Princesses
I was at WoodenToaster’s house writing lyrics for the new song. The song was entitled Weeping Angels. The lyrics I had so far were these.
They take the lives
Of more than you
Could count, and
Cry they might, but
They show no mercy,
They are after the
Ones I hold close,
The ones that
I love most
Weeping Angels,
They live in the
Basement, of the
Pony who made them,
They have mercy, for
Only those who hate them,
I had no clue what to write next. Glaze walked out of his room, humming his song “Heartmender.”
I picked up my parchment and quill.
“Bye, Woodentoaster,” I said, “I have to go do something very important.”
Glaze nodded. “Bye.”
I asked Rarity for directions to Whooves Pharmacy, and she gladly gave them to me.
“Go past Sugar Cube Corner, take a left, and it’s a few blocks west from Golden oaks library.”
“Ok,” I said, and thanked her for the directions. “Bye, Rare.”
“Bye, Autora.”
After a short walk to visit Whooves Pharmacy, I walked to the counter and asked Dr. Whooves an simple question, “Is Derpy with your statues?”
“Wha-a-a-at?” he said nervously. “What statues?”
I glared at him.
“No, she’s not,” he whispered to me. “At least, I don’t think she is.”
I kept my eye on the stallion as I left.
I went to my house and urgently knocked on the door. I heard a scraping sound and the chokes of a breathless mare.
I gasped and turned around. I lifted my hind legs and slammed them against the door. I continued bucking until the door gave in. my legs were covered in splinters and blood, but I didn’t care. I stared at the statues, causing them to freeze. I walked over and pushed them off of Derpy; they were lighter than you would expect.
“Derpy, get the mallet.”
In about twenty seconds, I was smashing the concrete statues to dust.
I sat against the wall, breathless. The statues of Princess Luna, once solid, were now dust and pebbles.
Derpy was in my embrace. She was shaking. Much like ten years ago when I had found her in a box.
“It’s okay, my little Dinky,” I said, stroking her mane. “It’s okay.”
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My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Chapter 5: Discord, I’m howling at the moon!
I was in the hospital, getting the splinters removed from my legs.
They had finished with my left leg, and were starting on my right leg, when I heard a small poof! and, what do you know, there’s Discord standing over me!
“Uughhh!” I groaned. “What do you want, Discord?”
“Why in such a bad mood, friend?” he used his magic to remove the rest of the splinters from my leg.
“GAAHHH!” I screamed in pain.
“I’m simply trying to help.” he levitated a roll of gauze around my leg and bandaged my wounds.
“Discord-- GAH!-- go away!” I said through gritted teeth.
Discord poofed me outside, into the cold night. I got a strange urge. An urge to… to… howl.
And I did. I howled at the moon for as long as I could. When I finally stopped, I was completely out of breath.
“Let me tell you one thing,” Discord said. “Whooves is at it again.”
“What?” I said.
Discord grinned. “And he’s using your friend, Dinky Doo as a secondary subject.”
Poof!
Discord was gone and I was back in the hospital.
“DOC!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
A doctor stroll in merrily. “What is it, Autora?”
“I need to get out of the hospital,” I said urgently, “now!”
“What?” said the doctor. “You’re no fully healed--”
“To HELL with being healed!” I screamed at the doctor. “My FAMILY is in danger! At least what family I have left!”
The doctor understood and got my a wheelchair and brought me outside. As soon as he let go, I used my wings to propel me to Whooves Pharmacy. I knew they were in his basement.
I flew down the stairs as fast as possible to see three tubes, Dinky in one of them, Whooves in another, and an empty tube in between. I could see the DNA cells channeling from both tubes to the center one.
I grabbed a mallet and smashed the tubes. I then took a pair of shears and cut the hoses.
Dr. Whooves and Derpy woke up.
“Fool!” said Whooves. “Do you realize what you’ve done?”
Something materialized in the center tube. A pitch black pony with no limbs and three heads. I could see its ribs. The Wither Pony.
“Not before,” I said answering Whooves’ question. “But I do, now.”
My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Hi. My name is Time Turner Whooves, but most know me as Dr. Whooves. It has been ten years since Autora’s last entry, and he left me this journal after the Cupcake incident with Pinkie Pie. And Derpy was taken by Dash to go to the factory, and basically everypony in town had a mishap, whether it was being taken to the factory, or becoming sick with a dreadful disease that nopony survives. The only ponies in town were a few members of the Dance Party team, Rainbow Dash, Snowdrop, my daughter Ditzy, a mysterious pony name Jeffery Woods, and me.
The Jeffery pony seemed out of place, always hidden in shadow, or seen shaking hoofs with another pony that seemed to vanish when he let go. Snowdrop seemed clueless of where she was, and sometimes went crazy and tried to walk up to Jeffery, only to be held back by Glaze. Snowdrop looked like… what’s her name… Lyra, but she had a lighter coat, and a striped baby-blue and white mane. Of course, her cutie mark was different, but, as I quote my beloved daughter, it’s great to be different.
But, enough with the description, and onto life.
I walked down the streets of Ponyville, greeting Glaze and Snowdrop as I passed them. I saw Jeffery again, and he looked lonely from what I could tell from the shadows, but he was… smiling. Why would he smile when his eyes looked lonely? I approached him nervously.
“H… hi, mister,” I said to the stallion.
“Help me…” he said solemnly. “Help me… I’m lost.”
I gulped. “Show me your face,” I said carefully, and gasped when I saw his face.
“Aren’t I beautiful?” his face was burnt, his eyes wide and unblinking, his smile was not natural, it was bloody, dead. It was cut into his face.
“Uh…” I hesitated.
“Aren’t… I… BEAUTIFUL?” he screamed at me.
After what seemed like forever of no response, he snapped.
“You don’t think I am, do you!?” he reached into his saddlebag and pulled out a knife. One like I’ve never seen before. “Then you should just… go to SLEEP!”
He swiped the blade at my neck. I ran. I ran from the psychopath.
“I WILL find and KILL you! You cannot escape!”
My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Chapter 9: the fool and the end for now
I walked to my house and opened the door. Derpy turned n the light and grinned.
“SURPRISE!!!”
I fell over and saw all my friends, and my family, standing, laughing. Fluttershy was still in makeup and costume, Pinkie’s mane was still combed down, Big Mac was still holding the knife, and Rarity’s eye décor was still on and her mane still unkempt.
“What?” I said in surprise. “I don’t… WHAT!?”
“It was all a prank!” said Ken Ashcorp. “And we got you GOOD!”
“Go to sleep…”
“And Jeff?” I said.
“Uh…” said Rarity, “there was no role of a ‘Jeff’ in the prank.”
“Jeff was my own prank,” said the white stallion. He took off a mask and his face was revealed.
“Cheese Sandwich?” said Pinkie Pie.
“Yup,” he said. He took out his rubber chicken out and placed it on his back. “Boneless and I needed a laugh.”
So that’s it, that’s the end. How Autora hid himself for ten years, I have no clue. But I was scared to death. I guess the prank worked.
Autora gets his journal back now, so bye, see you next story as a side character.
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My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
Chapter 3: a visit to the bar and an unexpected visit from Soaren.
The next day, I was at the bar, drowning my sorrows in alcohol. Dinky had moved out to live with that Dr. Whooves figure. I spotted a blue Pegasus at the other side of the bar making rude gestures at me. And for what?
I walked over to him. “Ya got a problem?” I said.
“Matter of fact, yes,” he said, his voice was familiar, but the slurred voice and the alcohol mad it difficult to tell. “I just got a divorce and now…” he started mumbling. He hung his head and started crying. I heard the single word, “Dashie.” It was Soaren. Co-captain of the wonder bolts.
“Hey, man,” I said, trying to comfort the heartbroken pony, “it’s okay. I just got my heart broken today.”
Soaren sniffed. “Really?”
“Yeah,” I said. “Hey speaking of which, what would you know about Dr. Whooves?”
“Oh, he’s the pony who has that weeping princess statue thingies.”
Weeping Princess statue? Oh, no. I’ve heard about those things. They chase you down and freeze when you look at them. But as far as I know, Derpy doesn’t know that Whooves has those statues. I had to save her from becoming Derpy Whooves.
“Look, Soaren,” I said, “you were a jerk to Rainbow Dash, and you could do WAY better than her. I know I did.” I relived that evening with Trixie in my mind.
“Well,” I said, “good luck finding the one pony that’s right for you.”
“Bye, Autora.”
“Bye, Soaren.” And I left.
My little Derpy 2: Dr. Whooves got in!
The monster towered above us, chirping at a high pitch. One head shot a black skull at us, but we dodges and the skull hit the wall, exploding.
“Whooves,” I said, “do you have a healing potion?”
“Yes,” he replied. “But only one.”
“Better make it count,” I said, and quickly added and lit a fuse to the potion, and threw it at the wither. It immediately exploded on impact, temporarily disabling the monster long enough for me to grab the mallet and break the wither pony’s backbone with a sickening CRRAAACK!
What was it with me and mallets this week?
I needed a powerful unicorn, but Twilight was too embarrassed about when she attacked me, Celestia hated me, for some reason I thaught of Zecora, but I could never find her house. Only one more pony I could think of.
Trixie.
“Keep the wither distracted,” I said to Derpy and Whooves. “I know somepony who can help us.”
I ran to Trixie’s house on the edge of Ponyville and knocked on the door. Trixie opened the door.
“Yes?” she said.
“I need help,” I said, breathless. “There’s a wither pony at Whoove’s Pharmacy--”
Trixie rushed past me.
I expanded my wings and flew to the pharmacy, leaving a streak of emerald green behind me.
I got there only a few seconds before Trixie.
“You’re fast,” I said.
Trixie chuckled. “That’s what she said.”
I face-hoofed. “Just help me defeat that monster.”
As we raced into the basement, I saw Whooves pinned to the wall by the wither. He waved awkwardly.
I once again grabbed the mallet and swung it at the wither pony, breaking off one of the heads with an ear-splitting shriek and another sickening crack.
I saw Trixie’s horn light, and the wither seized up, then started to twist and crack, until…
POOF!
The monster exploded into ash and dust. I saw a glimmering chunk of quartz, a Celestial Diamond. The rarest of all jewels. I picked it up and gave it to Trixie.
“Here,” I said, “for saving Derpy.
Whooves looked at me.
“…And Dr. Whooves.”
“Thank you,” Trixie said, and left.
I turned to Dr. Whooves. “Don’t EVER try to pull anything like that again!” I screamed at him. “Or I will have Mic and Tombstone banish you to the a lava hole, dig personally for YOU!”
Whooves dropped to the floor and wept.
“I… I’m sorry,” he said. “I never meant to hurt anyone.”
I knelt down to Whooves.
"It's ok," I said, "it's just... I've raised Derpy since she was a little filly. I just can’t stand to not have her in my life.”
We both stood up. I finally was fond of Dr. Whooves.