Equestria Guys

by Majestic Budder Gopher

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Rainbow Dash
Length: 1911

Have you ever wanted to know something so badly, you were willing to risk your life as you know it just to find out?

Rainbow Dash can't live not knowing how awesome her human self is, so she takes it upon herself to find out

Thank you to : Sontana Dusk Fan for some ideas on this story :D

Published 2014-05-28 22:50:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-07 22:43:53 UTC

Through the Portal

Rainbow Dash couldn't sleep, she'd been tossing and turning since she went to bed at ten, she glanced toward the clock for the what felt like the millionth time in the past five minutes! 1:38. She was sure she'd been to sleep at some point but she woke up again because there was no way she'd been staring at her ceiling for forty five minutes, maybe it was because her brain hated her and couldn't wait until morning to be annoying.

'Ugh!' Rainbow groaned as she rolled over onto her face, she needed to know, Twilight's stories just weren't enough for the blue Pegasus, she needed to see for her self. 1:39

'THAT'S IT!!' Rainbow jumped out of bed and onto the floor with a THUMP 'Sorry Tank' she looked at the ~~turtle~~ tortoise with her tired magenta eyes, 'I've got to find something out.' Tank rolled his eyes then went back to sleep 'Fine, I know where I'm wanted and it sure as shit isn't here.' She put a black body suit (because everyone seems to have a black bodysuit just lying around in their wardrobe) into a bag, then flew over to the train station, hoping that there was a train at this hour as she really didn't want to spend longer than she needed to wondering.

Pony Ville looked strange at night, all the shops was closed and all the lights were off in the houses, except for Twilight's library,

'That mare never sleeps, all she does is read her dumb egg-head books, not awesome ones like Daring Do.' Rainbow muttered to herself, she began to imagine how poor Spike must feel, being kept awake while Twilight read, then finally getting to sleep only to be woken up again merely two or so hours later, and then Twilight always complaining about him being lazy because he cant wake up at stupid o'clock in the morning!

'ALL ABOARD FOR THE CRYSTAL EMPIRE!' The conductor shouted and Rainbow came just on time and flew straight onto the nearest carriage, found a seat near the window and sat. The train was surprisingly crowded considering the time, it did take a few hours to get to the Crystal Empire though, maybe they needed to be there at four am for whatever reason, Rainbow didn't know the reason or care to find out to be honest it was just an observation and it would actually be quite creepy if she wanted to know, Rainbow was no stalker, she found the very concept disturbing, one pony following another's every step, even if she wasn't a stalker, that didn't mean that she couldn't speed up the journey by talking to some of the other ponies on the train, surely they were as bored as her,

'Hello!!' Rainbow turned to the mare sitting next to her, 'Hi!!' She repeated herself, but she spoke louder this time, maybe she couldn't hear her, or she was just ignoring her, either way, Rainbow was determined to speak to somepony, even a rude one. 'OI!!' no answer 'Hey you! Yeah you, with the green mane......... DON'T BE SUCH A RUDE BITCH AND LOOK AT ME!!!' Rainbow was pretty annoyed, so annoyed that she just went all up in somepony's face and called her a bitch!

'Fine!!' YES!! Finally a result! 'What do you want that's so important?!?'

'Aren't you painfully bored just sitting on this train, like seriously, I've been on here for five minutes and my arse is already numb!'

'Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah' she repeated that one word so quick, it may well have been all one word! 'Did not need to know about the blood circulation to your plot thank you very much, and no, I'm not painfully bored, I was enjoying the peace and quiet until you came along!'

'Ugh.... Your so boring it hurts!'

'Gee, thanks, your lovely too.' You could almost feel the sarcasm in the air around her, it was insane.

'I know someone you'd love!!'

'I really don't want to know-'

'My friend Twilight!!! You seem like an egg head too!!' And now, she was ignoring her, 'Fine...... nice talking to you too.'

Rainbow spent the next few hours on the train staring out of the window, bit of a waste of time really since it was pitch black outside, but she didn't care, there was nothing to do on the train, she wished that she'd brought her new Daring Do book with her so she'd have something good to do, but she knew that she'd zone out and probably miss her stop if she did so it was best that she didn't really. Rainbow checked her watch, (which she conveniently placed in her bag without you knowing) 2:54, just over an hour left on the train, she continued to stare out the window until it felt like the window was staring back, she stared for abut twenty minutes, until she fell into a thankfully dreamless sleep.

'Excuse me?' somepony was shaking Rainbow Dash's shoulders, which was extremely annoying, and it woke her up, Rainbow was not a happy bunny right now, she was absolutely shattered and as soon as she finally got to sleep, some ass hole decides to wake her up!

'What, what, what do you want?!' her annoyance showed right through in her voice

'Sorry, I just wanted to know what mane dye you use-'

'Ugh!' Seriously?! This stupid mare woke her up just to ask how she colored her mane!?

'I'm so sorry, it's just that, well as you can see, my mane is so bland and boring, I've wanted to get some colour in it for ages but-' she could tell Rainbow wasn't listening 'Plus, we're nearly at the Crystal Empire now so I would've had to wake you up anyway, I just thought it would be better if I asked you as well, you know, killing two birds with one stone I guess,'

'Wait, we're nearly here?' Rainbow was suddenly wide awake, she knew that soon, she would find out how awesome she was, even if it did mean scaring the ever living crap out of herself by there being two of her,

'Um.. Yea, pretty much round the corner, now please can you answer me?'

'Oh, yea sure, this is my natural colour, never dyed.' Rainbow couldn't really care less about her mane, it was normal to her and she didn't pay attention to it much, but if somepony else thought it was awesome then that's fine,

'REALLY?!?!? Ohmycelestia, your soo lucky, my hairs all stupid and gray'

'Yeah, I never really pay attention to it, you really think it's cool?'

'YES!! It's awesome! You could even say it was 20% cooler than mine'

'Do you know me?' Rainbow was slightly shocked that this stranger knew her, then again, she was very nearly a Wonderbolt, been to the academy, passed the exam, maybe she some how knew her by that,

'Of course I know you Spectrum!!'

'Spectrum?!'

'Yeah! Your that famous flier, Spectrum Streak!'

'No..... That's my dad, I'm Rainbow Dash'

'Ohhhhhhh.......... That makes more sense, sorry, he flys so fast its hard to tell genders, same hair you know? Are you a flier?'

'Yeah, I get it.... And yes, I might be going to join the Wonderbolts soon'

'Cool, Ooh! We're here, nice talking to you Rainbow Dash'

'Bye, um... nice meeting you... err..... whatever your name is'

The Crystal Empire looked so different at night compared to the day, just like Pony Ville, I think most places are like that though, it's either a hell of a lot busier or completely empty. It almost looked like Los Pegasus, just without the bright lights, casinos, pegasi and the addition of a giant statue of Spike.... then again, maybe it was nothing like Los Pegasus, none the less it was gorgeous at night.

Rainbow went into the train station toilets to slip into her bodysuit and snuck out into the streets towards the castle.

'What are you doing?' Rainbow was stopped by a young chrystal filly in a spike the dragon onesie,

'Wow.... you guys really love Spike don't you?'

'Answer me! What are you doing' She repeated, she seemed very up front and assertive, basically the opposite of Fluttershy,

'I'm going to.. um....... get milk!! yes! I am going, to get milk, because everyone knows you cant have cereal without milk! I mean, am I right or am I right?!' Rainbow thought of a quick excuse which was pretty good in her opinion.

'It's 4 in the morning and you seem to be wearing a black bodysuit...'

'I work the morning shift as a.. er.... whatgamicallit....... spa pony-mabob-thing' not such a good excuse but this girl looked about eight, no way was she smart enough to know that wasn't a real thing.

'A spa pony-mabob-thing eh?' *cough* Smart arse *cough*

'Yes.... that'

'And what about the bodysuit?'

'They're my pajamas, I'm only going to get milk, don't start working at the... place I work for another hour, I get ready after breakfast, now if you'll excuse me, I need to get milk now otherwise my entire scheduled of getting ready-ness will be completely fuuuuuu- ruined' And with that Rainbow walked away feeling like an absolute BOSS!!

Rainbow slunk a bit more sneakily now, flying overhead and blending in with the starless sky, perfect, oh how she loved flying, it was so much easier than walking, plus, she could get into the castle a lot quicker by flying through a window or something.

As she approached the castle, she caught a glimpse of the Spike statue from the corner of her eye and physically face hoofed herself,

'They actually love Spike, first it was a statue, then onsies, now they're worshiping the celestia damn statue at half four in the morning!!' BANG!! Rainbow had been to absorbed in her thoughts to pay proper attention to her whereabouts and ended up crashing into the castle,

'ow' she said rubbing her head, she looked through the window she just flew into and realized that somepony was waking up, within a second Rainbow was gone, she flew through another window and wizzed her way through the castle until she got to the room with the portal as quick as her wings could take her, well, without breaking the sound barrier and creating a sonic rainboom that is. She saw the portal, in the middle of the room, glowing blue and sparkly, exactly how she remembered it, she took off her bodysuit and put it in her bag, then, then she was ready to go through the portal, she wasn't sure it would work, she had no idea how long thirty moons was but it was worth a shot.

She walked up to the portal, she was nervous now, but also excited, the Pinkie in her head started screaming abut how she was nervousited. She raised her hoof which went straight through, it was working! It was really working!! Rainbow was so excited now that she new it worked that she almost ran through, while she was in the portal, she got distorted in all sorts of ways until finaly she fell through, and pretty much got projected out of the portal and bodyslammed a tall boy standing just next to the mirror.

Author's Note

Sorry about the short chapters, I am trying to get better at that