Rainbow Dash Presents : The Mentally Advanced Seriesby bright foalChaptersA Fresh StartThe Day Of The DashThe Group PhotoFanFic Reading #1New Line of WorkThe Thunder From Down UnderShy one's gigA Fresh Start""What is that foolish name? Yes, since when we need a new start? Pinkie does not approve of it!" "Well, Pinkie Pie, This is a new format, so we kinda have to start from nothing, said Rainbow Dash the Awesome pegasus" "Well, technically this isn't a new format, we did fan fiction when we switched to the Rainbow Dash Presents Videos, also, did you just narrated yourself? That’s just weird" "Of course I narrated my self Twilight. How else would the reader will know who is talking?" "I do want to be rude, yes, so I need to point out the writer is coloring out lines in different colors, yes, each color fits only one pony, hehehehe" "How do you know what the writer is doing? It makes no sense." "Girls, where our bodies?" "Shut up Tunderthigh. Nopony likes you!!" "Sorry" "I said shut up!!!" "Pinkie must say, yes, that the shy yellow one has got a point, yes. We seem to be just voices in the writer’s mind" "Well what do you want? We didn't even started to picture the world, so we are still just concepts, floating around his mind" "How long do you reckon till we’ll be back in full form? I hate to do apple bucking this way" "I donno Applejack, Its really depends on how long he can drag this part I think" "And how you know that? You got special powers now?" "Nooo, I just am the story teller, so I got to do all those explanations" "Who made you the story teller? Pinkie will do much better job then you, yes, why she isn't the story teller?" "Cause..." "Cause what? Tell Pinkie, yes, Tell Pinkie now!!!" "Cause It's RAINBOW DASH presents, not Pinkie Pie presents, doh" "Pinkie Pie Presents would be 10 times better then Rainbow Dash Presents, yes! They are trying to push down my talent, yes!" "Well I think Rarity Presents would be better." "Good Joke Rarity. If you do presents then we will never leave your bedroom, yes." "Just so you know there is more to courtship then what happens in the bedroom, though that thing don't need to be in the bedroom per say, or even while lying down if you got the right stallion..." "I'm confused, what is Rarity talking about?" "Hehehe, Silly Rainbow Dash, She don't know the meaning or hoof fighting, yes." "Well I’m back"*Gulp* "And where have you been?" "I'm an alcoholic who don't give a damn, where you think I been? I went to raid the liquor cabinet"*gulp* "You do know that’s stealing right? And there are fillies in here!" "How can you tell? We’re all just lines on screen, plus I need my buzz if I’m gonna be hanging with you simpletons again" *Gulp* "I AM A NORAML PONY. AND AS SUCH I FEEL VERY NORMAL IN THIS FORM" "Well I don't. This is too creepy. I want my old body back, now I feel sorry for all the chickens we beheaded back in the farm" "You know what I figured out? Now I am inside and all over all of you and you all are inside of OH Scootalo!!!" "That’s Disgusting." "More like disturbing." *Gulp* "Alright, its time to get our bodies back." "Hehehe, Pinkie Pie did much weirder things then this, yes." "This was a normal day in Ponyville, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and Rainbow Dash was going to meet her good friend Pinkie Pie." "Wait, why Pinkie Pie don't got a body yet but Rainbow Dash does? Yes." "That’s Cause your a ghost silly, don't you remember the end of Bittersweet?" "Since when we have continuity in this thing?" "Since forever I guess? The hole in the Haunting Nightmare was seen in A Day in Equestria." "Yes, but that was the only time there was continuity, yes, and Pinkie Pie can prove that." "Well, do try, but I think you will fail, Rainbow Dash Presents is pretty air tight." "Well, if it was so, then how did you fly After My Little Dashie, yes. In the end of that you were too fat to fly and Fluttershy was left in the other world, yes, but she was seen on Bittersweet, yes." "Well I guess your right then, Pinkie Pie is back to being alive." "I do not love that god power you got, yes, but it is good to be back in my old body, yes. Where are the rest?" "Well, a lot changed, Rarity is gone, that’s a good start." "How Rarity is gone?" "Well she spent the night with this pony, and he was sick, and then she got sick..." "Then she dropped dead right? Hehehe." "Well, no, Cause then they made a drug that cured pony AIDS, but it was too expensive..." "So she couldn't afforded it and died right?" "Well she spent the night with the doctor who made the drug and she got it for free and was cured, but then the doctor got very sick and died, and Rarity went to court and was charged with murder using lady parts, then she was sent to jail." "That is the dumbest thing I ever heard, yes! And I heard dumb things, Rarity is here with us, yes." "I got a body, now lets use it." "It seems Pinkie Pie got the same god power that Rainbow Dash has, yes. I wonder... Rainbow Dash starts hitting herself!" "Ouch, That’s not fair Pinkie Pie, ouch, what I did to you?" "Your mere existing angers Pinkie, yes. Why you hitting your self, Dash? Why are you hitting your self? Hehehe" "Rainbow Dash stops hitting herself, and don't you dare do that again Pinkie!" "You don't get to tell Pinkie what to do, now where is drunk purple pony thing?" "She’s dead, she did something in chemistry while being drunk and died in a very painful way." "I don't approve, purple pony is here, I need her to be my victim, also she got wings now! Yes." "Where am I? And why I got wings again? And where’d my booze went?" "You are here cause Pinkie called you, yes, and the wings are just to drive you crazy, wings drives pony crazy, yes." "Well I'm going back home to get up on my drinking, and if you dare to follow me I will do the thing with the stick Celestia showed me, and you don't want that." "Who needs her anyway. Now where is shy yellow one?" "Fluttershy? She’s locked up in a mental ward after cutting me with a chainsaw." "Rainbow Dash, you confused with series, and of such different nature. Your head is very weird place, yes, weird yellow one is here, yes." "I'm sorry, I should have been the same as the other series." "Don't worry Fluttershy, it's ok, you don't have to be mean." "Silence!!! Yellow shy one is away now, and to make things short, yes, also country stinky pony and three crazy fillies are here too, and in future everypony we need is just here, and no pony got god powers anymore, yes." "Why you took my god powers? It was so much fun." "Cause only Pinkie should have god powers, cause she will abuse them, yes." "But you don't got them anymore." "What do you mean? Sure Pinkie have god powers." "No, You said nopony got god powers, so you don't have god powers too." "Rainbow Dash is hit by a giant hummer!" "See? Nothing happened." "Curses!! Pinkie was fooled, this will not be the end! Yes." "Well it kinda is, Soo THE END." THE END "I forgot to do a song!!" "Since when we do a song?" "It’s kinda our thing, you know?" "And how you plan to do a song in this format? Yes." "I’ll do what you did in cupcakes, I will steal a known song and change the lyrics." Music by Spice Girls Lyrics by Rainbow Dash "Wait? Spice Girls? That’s not going to end well." "Shhhh, it’s starting" "I'll Tell you what I want, what I really really want!!!" "Don't tell me what you want, cause I really don't care." "I will still tell you what I want, what I really really want." "If you go on like this, I'll drink myself to death." "I want love, I want food, I want fame, I want hope, and I really really want a nice hug..." "Please some one make her stop, I can't take it anymore." "If she keeps on like that, my head will sure explode!" "This will stop right now, it's gone for much to long." "It is good timing, why didn't you thought of it before?" "Why you stopped the music Spike?" "What it’s really going to get any better?" "Nooo, its Spice Girls, there is a reason why nopony wants them to regroup." "So this is it? This is the last time we will be alive? Yes." "Nooo, It is just a start, there will be more, it’s going to be slice of life kinda thing now, so we can go on forever." "I'm hoping my liver won't last that long." "In the rate your drinking, you won't need to wait much longer, yes." "Sooooooo, The End" THE END(not really). The Day Of The Dash"What is this foolish name? yes, Pinkie Demands to know!" "Well I wanted a title that will bring ponies to read this, so this one stalion told me on a crazy show, and they did like a fan service thing under a very similar title, I thought if I will use it ponies will read this." "Dash You fool!!! It will just confuse everypony and you just don't do that, yes, beside, we don't have fans." "Well I already did it so lets start with the story ok?" It was a sunny day in Ponyville, the birds were tweeting, the sky were clear and you could see the sun in all its glory, though you shouldn't look at the sun directly as you can lose your sight, then you have to do some eye surgery, and its really scary, I should know, I was forced to do like 7 times on both eyes, they always say "Dash, you can't look at the sun all the time, you will fry your brain and your health care won't pay if you gonna lose your eye sight again" but what they know, its really pretty and it makes me feel happy and worm inside, but I didn't needed more surgerys after AppleJack gave me a pair of really cool dark glasses that make me look better when the sun looks back at me, I really don't know why it works but I guess.... "SPIKE!!!! where is my brandy bottle? I can't stand liseaning to Rainbow Dash all the time, I tell you this new format is killing me." "Coming, coming, Didn't we agreed you will lay down the hard drop now? you really can't keep going like this." "I am giving up drinking, I swiched from whisky to brandy didn't I? and its hard, brandy is such a sissy drink, I want whisky soo badlly now." "Well I don't see how thats an improvement..." Then Spike coughed and a green fire ball came out, bringing a scroll with it "You know I can see it myself, I tell you one of these days." Twilight took hold of the scroll with her magic and started reading it "Do you HAVE to say everything I do? now lets see, mmm , makes sense she will ask me to do that, ah ah, mm mm, WHAT? SHE CAN'T BE SERIOUS!!" Spike Coughed yet another scroll, and like before, Twilight picked it up and read it "So she IS serious, SPIKE, I NEED 10 gallons of the worst Whisky, NOW!!!" "Come on, how bad it can be" "Take a look." "Ok, mm, teaching, not far fetched, mmm, Teach who?? ok, this is bad, I will go bring that whisky." "So, You all probably wander why I brought you three here today." "Wow, your good, Its like you can read my mind." "Rainbow Dash, You are resented by Pinkie, yes." "Did anypony saw how good Twilight looks with wings? OH!" *Gulp* "Well not that you will care but Dear Princess Celestia thought I should teach you group of half baked ponies some history and see what I could learn from it, she also ordered me to film it and give you all 10 custard pies each, but since I know how That will end up I went on a limb and decided to skip on that part, well I don't see any reason to wait with the suffering so lets start." "Twilight then turnd to write on the board." "Shot Up Rainbow!" "Twilight called behind her back." "Oh my, would you look at that plot, I bet its hard as rock, I can almost hear it calling to me, its the siren call, OH!' "Would you two silence yourselfs, Pinkie wants to learn! yes." "Since when you like to study? I thought you were all about pranking and such." "And how can you concentrate when you got such lovely round firm plot infront of your very hungry eyes..." "I can as foolish world left his weakness in the past, learning them will help Pinkie in her Quest for world domantion!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!, yes, no, its just very interesting, yes, thats is why Pinkie wants to learn, forget the part on global conquest, yes, forget part on global conquest." "So After the great Banana Suit Crisis..." "Scootalo, what you say we leave this place and go play some air ball outside?" "I would love to, but I got to stay here in case I will get some private teaching with the HOT teacher!" "I thought you didn't wanted to learn." "I still need some private time with miss hot Sparkle here, maybe in her bedroom, some private teaching in PR class, maybe I could show her some of my workouts. OH!" "You are a bore, Scootalo, What about you Pinkie Pie?" "You are truely a fool if you believe that annoying the pink will benefit you Rainbow Dash." "This is just great, I'm Stock here in the boring class with nothing to do, I wish there was a song at least." "I believe I got something to help you on that, Twilight!" "What you want? and why can't you leave me alone?" "Why I would want to leave such a pretty sexy mare? and could you play the electric guitar?" "Well I guess that If I use my magic I could play pretty good while getting up on my drinking..." "Thats so sweet, now, PInkie!" "What you going to pester Pinkie with now?" "You will play the bass, everypony know the bass players are insane." "I don't think thats how it works..." "You get to play the keyboard Rainbow Dash!" "Oh my, thats so cool! thanks Scootalo!" "So Pinkie is guessing you play the drums then? yes." "Why no, I'm the lead singer! Rarity is the drumer!" "Why would Rarity do the drumming? Pinkie would hate to know how she will use the drum sticks. yes." "Well Just so you know that I learnd how to give a good rhythm, Its very importent in my field you know." "Well this will end well" *gulp* Music by Van Helen Lyrics by Scootalo "Aw Wow, mare Gimme A sec Twilight is so hot with wings it seems, OOOOOHHHH!!!! OHHH YAH!!!!!!!!!!! Twi Twi Twilight, Please show me more plot! When you turn around to teachhhh, I'm already in hell, Cause I can't have my way with you in this school!!! I Think of all the plot within my reach! But my teachers were never quite hot like this!!! I am Bad, You Like Bad, I am Bad!! I'm hot for Twilight!!!! She's Just Hot!!! Dumm Hot!!!! I'm hot for Twilight!! I thought you missed me so i'm back! I Brought my TOY!!! And Another mare to join us!! OHHHH!!!! I just love your lessons, When you write on the board, I can see right in you!!! Drunk mare from Canterlot, How can you be so hot! I want to be wraped around you.... I think of all the plot withing my reach! But my teachers were never quite hot like this!! I Am Bad, You Like Bad, I Am Bad!! I'm hot for Twilight!! She's just hot!!! dumm hot!!! I'm hot for Twilight!!! OH mare, where did to go?! I wanna feel dirty I'm In Bliss!!! I am bad, You want bad, I am bad, I'm hot for Twilight!!!" "The end Is Neigh!!!" "I Think I'm done!!!" THE END(not really) The Group Photo"You know what we need for this story?" "Again, I don't care! would you leave my library now?" "We need some sort of a image that will drew ponies in our story, it is ridiculous, We are over 3,000 words in, 100% love and just barely past 100 views, not to say all the comments were made by 2 ponies, one of them is the writer!" "What is ludicrous is that you insist on staying on my library regardless my demanding for your departure!" "Maybe I would do something if you talked in English!!" "I am talking in English, do simple Dash have trouble understanding my words?" "Well, yha, I would love it if you could explain them." "Well ludicrous is preposterous." "I still don't understand." "this is absurd!" "Speak English!!" "You know what? GET THE BUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT RETARD!!!???" *Sobs* "No one asked you to be mean, you hurted my feelings, say sorry." *Sobs* "Well I'm sorry that your such a colossal A hole!! NOW GET LOST!!!" "Well" *Sobs* "I got to go to get everypony to come in for the photo anyway" *Sobs* "I will come back later." "NO PONY ASKED YOU TO TAKE A GROUP PICTURE!!!" Rainbow Dash the Awesome flow out of the Golden oak Library and flew to Sweet Apple Acres to talk with Applejack and Applebloom on the group photograph. "Hi Applejack, Could you come to Twilight's house later? I want to take a group Photo for our story." "Well shoot darling I wish I could, but I got so many things to do here and I think I wouldn't make it, I'm sorry..." "Yo Applejack! I got the hose running, can we go do that mud slide thing now? yha know, since we ain't got nothing better to do, Oh Hi Rainbow Dash!!" "Oh Hi Applebloom, I wish I could join you at the mud slide it sounds so fun, But I got to round up all the ponies for a group photo, I asked Applejack to come too but she said you were busy with things." "Well sure we will come, We ain't got nothing better to do, right big sister?" "Shhh, you don't know what jobs we got to do." "What yha Talking bout'? sure I know, We pick apples, not much more work then that, gosh darn it we don't even water the trees, you sure y'all are thinking right?" "You know that Y'all is plural, right?" "So Your coming or not?" "Sure we will come!!!" "Sister I love you very much but sometimes you make me wish you weren't born," *sigh* "Sure Rainbow Dash, we'll come for your photo group." "Thats great guys, well I be going now, see you later!" "SPIKE!!!!!" "What you want now?" "I need you to go to the liquer store and get me all the vodca and whisky they got." "Why you need that? we got plenty of full bottles here." "Well Rainbow Dash had this idea to bring everypony here for a group photo, so I may need all the booze I could get my hooves on." *Twilight opened a whisky bottle* "And I need to get a head start on my drinking." *Twilight started drinking straight from the bottle* "You really don't need to drink that much in order to tolerate them you know." "Who said I drink to tolerate them?" *gulp* "With luck I will be dead or in a coma before anypony will come here." "OK....... well I be heading for the liquer store, see you later...." After Sweet Apple Acres the Amazing Rainbow Dash went to the Carousel boutique. "Rarity!!! Sweetie Belle!!! are you here?" "Oh my! its my favorite Horse around here!!" "Hi Scootaloo, Why you wearing this black suit with metal stads? you look like High Scream on one of his shows" "I been Taking lessons in Hard Love, baby, and Rarity is my teacher, OH!!!" "I Swear It's not how it looks like!!" Rarity came out of the backroom wearing a very weird black string dress and holding a small black whip with her magic, "I say it looks like you been teaching her to behave herself." "I was needed of teaching, Rarity knows what a naughty filly I was, OH!!" "I Swear It was leagl!" "Well I just came to tell you there will be a group photo later and you are invited." "DID I HEARD THERE WILL BE A PHOTO TAKEN? I MUST GET MY OFFCIAL WAR UNIFORM, JUST LIKE A NORMAL FILLY!!!" "Well kids do love to dress up for photoshots, I just need to get more ponies so I be heading out now. bye!" "YOU TWO, RETURN TO YOUR MISCHIEVOUS WAYS, I NEED TO HEAR SCREAMS OF PAIN AS I PUT ON MY SACRED OUTFIT!" *Shrug* "I guess we go on where we stopped?" "Oh Yha!!! I am still a very naughty girl who needs discipline, OH!!" "Thats Great, Cause I got a suprize for you in my room..." "You think Scootaloo will come?" "Who cares? I had a court order to have her in a chastity device for the next month after the incident last time she was here."*hip* "And who going to put it on her? I don't know a pony that will get near that girls genitals." "Rarity said she will handle it," *hip* "I sure hate these wings, Spike, more booze!!" The Next stop was Sugar Cube Corner, Where Pinkie was Puting on a banana suit, "Hi Pinkie, whats up with the funny suit?" "Pinkie Don't need to explain you, yes, PInkie Pie will use her new found knowledge that foolish Twilight has shared to bring down the princesses, then nothing will stand in the way for Pinkie to rule the world!!! yes,nothing will stand in the way" "Well I wanted to say that there will be a group photo later and I want you to join for it." "You fool, why would Pinkie want to be immortalized with your group of ponies?" "Well if you going to act like that then I don't want you in the story image then." "Wait!!, You said story image? as in the first thing ponies will see when they lay their eyes on this story? yes" "Yes.... but you said you don't want to." "Pinkie was wrong, yes, Pinkie will join you at the photo as she no trust you to bring in the ponies, yes" "Well thats a reason to come... I will see you later! bye Pinkie!" "Bye Rainbow Dash ,what Rainbow Dash don't know is that I will use the photo to show Pinkies supremacy over the rest of the ponies, and she will control the minds of all the ponies with her banana suit!,HAHAHAHA!!!" *hip* "I wonder..." "What you wonder Twilight?" *hip* "How painful it will be to bite off the wings..." "I don't think its a good idea." "You Right." * hip* "I'm not drunk enough right now" *hip* Gulp* "Why am I drinking?" *hip* "Oh who cares." *gulp* The last place was Fluttershy house, and The Swift Rainbow Dash Just made it, "Hi Fluttershy!" "Hi Rainbow Dash," "There Will be a Photo shoot in Twilight's house, you want to come?" "Will my uncle will see that photo? I really want my uncle to see me..." "I Don't know, but it will be publicity seen, its the new image for our story," "Ok Rainbow Dash, I will come, I just hope my uncle will see it..." "Sure... Well... I got to go now to be in the photo... so... I will see you there! bye!" "Bye." "Hi Twilight I'm Back, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!!" "What It seem like?" *hip* "I'm tring to bite my wings off, if it wasn't that painfull I would have had a start already, so far I only got some feathers off" *hip* "Hi There, We made it, Can we do it fast now?" "Hi Rainbow, what Twilight doing AJ?" "Twilight is doing some grown up stuff Applebloom, Just Ignore it." Just then Rarity came with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, Rarity was wearing black seethourgh lace socks and had Scootaloo on a leash, Scootaloo was wearing a short skirt that hardly covered a metal apparatus that covered all of her groin area, Sweetie belle was wearing some weird Alian Suit that looked really odd. "Rarity!!! I thought I told you I don't want Applebloom to see what Scootaloo is wearing." "Oh come on, It's kinda cute, she all locked up from grinding on ponies." "How much I love control games Rarity, you really got to let me get free, mama need her fun time, OH!!" "Scootaloo got to wear it cause she humped ponies? why didn't she was just fixed like winnona?" "Well It don't work like that for ponies, and since you know thous things?" "Well It worked good for winnona, I don't see why it won't work for Scootaloo, and I pick things up." "WHY ARE WE WAITING? THE ARMOR SUIT IS HURTING ME! THAT IS NORMAL!" "Pinkie Pie is here, Take the photo while she can stay in the banana suit, Pinkie forgot to use breathable fabric for this suit, it was not a bright idea, yes, Pinkie can see it now." "What are you wearing?" *chewing on wing* "You Look silly." "You won't laugh when PInkie will send you to work on the dirt mine, yes, you won't laugh on the dirt mine." "Well the timer is set, everypony to group together." "Guys I think you closed the door..I can't get in..." "3... 2...1... " *SNAP!!!!!* Then we had our group photo, Twilight was on the left side trying to chew her wing off, right behind her you could see Fluttershy with her head in the window, in the middle I was there, standing happliy with a huge smile on my face, Applejack and Applebloom could be seen arguing in the back, PInkie Pie was jumping in her banana suit between the Apple sisters and Twilight, Rarity was hitting Scootaloo hoof who was tring to fiddle with her chastity belt on the far right and Sweetie Belle was standing near me from the right as well, in her heavy battle armor, standing like a guard, and Spike was standing on the right, with his claw over his face, I think he was ashamed, good photo I would say. THE END(For now) FanFic Reading #1"Would you believe we got no respond on the last chapter?" "Pinkie is Baffled, yes, Pinkie don't remember that you did anything but post the chapter." "Well, I sent links to all the ponies who did the original series, and nopony replied, It's like no pony cares!!!" "Pinkie don't think that sending links is what going to push your story forward, yes, maybe if you write stories worth reading first ponies will come and read, yes, let the work speek for it self." "But It IS good, everypony who moved their plot and read this agrees, also that don't explain why I sent hundreds of mails and asks to them but never got even ONE REPLY!!!!" "But you are a Fictional character, yes, PInkie don't thinks fictional characters can send mail to flesh and blood ponies, yes, Pinkie have tried to send letters to real ponies before, but the saddle arabian ponies didn't get her mails, Pinkie is most displeased with it, yes." "Why would you write letters to the saddle arabian ponies in the first place anyway?" "Pinkie finds that they could be more evil, yes, they didn't blow up a national monument lately, yes, Pinkie needs them to blow up national monuments." "You know they do video logs on their Ponytube channel." "Where you came from?" "You are at the library." "Thats cause I can't write new chapters at my house." "You know that you can write it offline then come here and upload it and be done in 30 seconds, that way you can write at your own time, and most importantly, You will spend less time annoing me, which will improve your life span immensely." "It's not being online, I got WiFi at my cloud house..." "Then what is it?" "I don't own a good computer, mine keep crashing and jumping." "Pinkie thinks you should get new computer.yes" "Well even with my work at the weather control, and the money from mom and dad I just make it every mounth, rent in Ponyville is very expansive, and cloud homes are very high to maintenance." "Back on topic, they still do Vlogs on the Ponytube, maybe they answered you there?" "Pinkie thought we agreed that Rainbow Dash can't send letters, yes, Pinkie Pie thought we agreed." "Well we also know that Rainbow Dash just express the frustration of the story writer, and to that I say, Did you looked on their Ponytube Channel? maybe they answered you on the 'one on one with rae' vidoes." "Well they should know I have no time to watch it, It's long and boring, it's just rae sitting infront his camare talking on stuff." "Would you stop with the act? we know its not really you." "What Pinkie don't get is what are we doing right now?" "We are doing commentary! like I did on the start of Captian hook the biker gorlia and on the pony fantasy lets play." "Pinkie Pie don't remember that video, also, Pinkie Pie didn't liked that lets play series.yes." "You wouldn't liked that story anyway Pinkie, we just grounded up fillies into rainbows." "......." "Why you giving me that face Pinkie?" "IN WHAT WORLD GRINDING FILLIES INTO RAINBOWS ISN'T SOMETHING THAT PINKIE WOULD WANT TO BE A PART OFF?!!!!! PINKIE IS MAD, yes, PINKIE SHOULD HAVE DONE THE GRINDING, yes, PINKIE LIVES FOR IT!!!!!!!!" "Well I liked the Pony Fantasy game." "Thats because you were the main character, Pinkie didn't got a chance to kill anypony in that game, It's not fair, yes." "I didn't got lot of screen time too, and you don't hear me complain." "You fool, You ran the show, Pinkie only got lines after the middle point, yes." "So thats all? can you go home now? I am getting tired of this stuff." "No silly, we still got to do something, and you know what I found online?" "I'm sure I know but lets play, Want you found?" "I found this great site, called FiMFiction, It got lots of cool stories, maybe we should do vidoes of some of the stories there." "Surly Rainbow Dash isn't serious, yes." "What?" "We did it allready, that was all the basis of the Rainbow Dash Presents." "If that was the basis of Rainbow Dash Presents then why there are only 9 Rainbow Dash Presents?! If we really worked from stories in that site we sould have like a million Rainbow Dash Presents, as there are over a million stories in this site!" "Well not all the stories are well knowen and most of them won't be able to work with our personalitys." "What our personalitys got to do with it? we just need to act you know, you know what? bring all the gang here and I will show you that we can do any story from a group I will pick at random." "This I will want to see, Pinkie, Bring the lame excuse for ponies that Celestia makes be befriend." "Pinkie don't know on what you talking. yes." "I'm Talking on Rarity, Applejack and Buttercry, also bring the three little weirdos." "Guys, I know this will be great, that random group got lots of stories!" "Let me see what group you got... Oh crap." "So why you brought us here again?" "We gonna show Twilight we can do any story from this site I found, and we will start from all the stroies in this group I picked at random!" "I would like to know where they found that photo of me!" "I know, right? It's super cute, look, inside they even got another foal photo, this time of Fluttershy, see?" "I don't know what to say to you honey...." "Bubblethy is not a foal in that photo." "Then how you explain her outfit? and the way she drinks?" "I don't remember taking this photo." "Hehehe, Pinkie thinks you got in the dark side of the site, yes." "Just Look at the title, its says ADULT FOALS and PADDED PONIES, what you think it's on?" "Why that sounds familiar?" "I donno, maybe its on ponies that look very young and love pillows?" "You are silly Rainbow Dash..." "Well here is a story we could try, its called 'Pattycakes' and there are even 3 parts!" "Maybe we should read it all first before playing it out? you know, so there won't be any nasty suprizes." "Good idea, that Cupcakes sure was a suprize for me." 5 minutes later... "I don't feel comfortable with this story..." "Well It really don't make lots of sense... WAIT YOU DO WHAT?!!!" "I'm sorry for my actions in that story..." "Well this ain't making a lick of sense." "Pinkie thinks things will be clear on the next part.." "Well looking at the tabs it seems that we will need Scootaloo for that part. this site is really nice, the stories not so much." "Did somepony said my name?" "Hi sis, what you doing?" "Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, what Y'all doing here?" "JUST LIKE NORMAL PONIES WE FOLLOWED OUR FRIEND SCOOTALOO WITHOUT ASKING, THAT IS NORMAL." "Well Take this Scootaloo, we need you to read it." "Did you printed all the stories?" "Yes.. you forgot the printer open." "Someday I will get you back for it you know..." "What I don't get is why a pony will pee in a diaper when they can have a shower of gold baby, OHH!!!" "Whats a golden shower?" "ME TOO AS A NORMAL PONY, HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS A GOLDEN SHOWER!" "You fools, a golden shower is when you are showerd with all the gold you acquired doring your life." "Won't that hurt?" "More then you think, yes, as they melt the gold first then shower you with the molten gold, it is Pinkies favorite way of execution, yes. "But what if one don't have lots of gold and survives it?" "There are follow ups is you still alive after the gold shower. yes." "AS A NORMAL PONY, I DEMAND TO KNOW, IN GREAT DETAIL, OF THE OTHER WAYS PONIES ARE PUT TO DEATH IN A VERY PAINFUL WAY." "If gold shower don't work, then all the other metals you own are molten and rained on you, yes, and if that won't kill you, then you are cooked in your family soup, yes." "What you mean when you say cooked in our family soup?" "Pinkie will grind all your family into mash, yes, then she will boil that mash with you in it, yes, it is very fun thing to do!" "Well that was distorbing, how about everypony will read lots of stories and then we will pick one together?" "Sounds great, lets do it!" "Pinkie will agree with your plan, yes, but only this one time!" "Ain't got anything better to do." "I will get on it." "Sure, why not." "Mmmmmm, ok.. If you want to." "This group is Stupid!, yes." "What makes you say that?" "90% of the stroies are on you or Twilight, and most of the rest of the shy yellow one, where is the love for Pinkie Pie? yes." "What is weird is that 90% of the stories on me got to do with me being an alicorn and and age spell gone wrong, thats just lazy writing right there." "Well there is this one called the night book that you regress as a way to handle your OCD." "What OCD? any sign of that was long gone from all my drinking." *gulp* "I don't think I can do any of the stories here, it's too embarrassing." "What is embarrassing, Fluttershy?" "I can't wet myself on command..." "Well thats easy all you have to do is.." "STOP!" "What?" "We are not going in there, we will not have a peeing contest." "Now I Remember where I know this..." "Pinkie Pie don't want to know, Rainbow Dash stop this story, yes, STOP THIS STORY RIGHT NOW!!!" "Ok Pinkie, you don't have to yell, I think we should all go home, maybe later I will find a diffrent group and we could try again, ok?" "Could it be a clop fiction group?" "Why there will be a group on ponies running and making sounds with their hooves?" "Clop Fiction is not... well most of the stories in this group are clop... you know what? I give up." *gulp* "Well I be going now everypony, bye." "I'm going too, I got some thinking to do on my life..." "No Pony cares!!!! that Tumbledry, would you believe? wheres Rarity?" "Last I saw her she went to the bathroom." "And that Is the time for Pinkie to leave, Goodbye!" "Goodbye Pinkie, and I guess I will be going too, well, bye!" THE END!(not really) "I think they forgot about us." "HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? WE ARE THREE CUTE FILLIES." "You mean three cute and HOT fillles baby..." "I'm going before it gets awkward" "I WILL COME WITH YOU, JUST LIKE A NORMAL PONY WILL DO." "Guys wait for me!!" New Line of Work"Would you believe this??!!! I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT!!!!!" *Gulp* "What is it now Rainbow?" "I can't even say it it's so angring!!" "Pinkie never heard of a word such as angring, yes. Pinkie would have rememberd it." "I think she ment irritating, but simple dash don't know fancy words." "I do to know fancy words!" "HAHAHAHA, You crack Pinkie up. yes. Rainbow Dash don't even know how to use proper grammar ,yes. Rainbow Dash don't know how to use proper grammar." "What got your tail in a knot any way?" "It's Fragging Trixie Variety Show. Would you believe they placed The Mentally Advanced series on the front page?" "So your mad that we made it to the front page of the lame website you wanted to be in all this time?" "It's not a lame website, it's THE main website for ponies, and it isn't us who made it to the front page." "Pinkie is confused, yes. Aren't we the Mentally Advanced ponies? yes. Also what is 'fragging'?, Pinkie never heard of such word, yes.Pinkie never heard of such word." "The thing they posted wasn't our Mentally Advanced thing but a new thing from the orignal creator, and Fragging is instead of..." *wisper in Pinkie's ear* "Cause we can't swear here." "Why is this Foolish thing that we can't curse here? who they Fragging think they are? the Fragging pony police? I will teach those ill conceived ponies excuse for defecation who say the final word here, those bucking ponies!!... Curses!!! Now Pinkie here talks all funny. Pinkie can't curse properly." "Well thats not true, I called you a retard." "Well retard isn't really a curse, it is a diagnosis, Like autist isn't realy a curse..." "But I used it as a curse, it got to count." "Well I.... In fact.... Funny thing...." "You are not trying to say you ARE a retard, are you?" "Well I.... am kinda... diagnosed as one..." "I would never have guessed..." "REALLY? I know they told me im an high level retard but I never knew I hid it so well. oh my gosh." "I was being sarcastic you know, the only thing that don't add up is that you are considered High level retard." "They have must set the bar very low for her to be high level, yes. Pinkie will have to see how low it's set." "You are insane, you know that PInkie?" "You may laugh but Pinkie get a fat bits bag every moon due to her diagnosis. yes. Pinkie lives well off her wellfare money." "Why you live off your wellfare money? don't you have a job at the Sugar Cube Corner?" "Pinkie was fired from that job, yes ,Ms Cake wasn't happy for me trying to make cupcakes from her customers, yes ,One time Pinkie forgot to filter the bones and teeth and suddnly 'Your Fired Pinkie!', it is not fair to Pinkie, yes, It is not fair to Pinkie." "Well don't worry Pinkie, I will help you get a new job, you can count on me!!" "This won't end well..." "PInkie don't understand why she need a job,yes.She is doing preety well on her wellfare money." "Well what if you want more spanding money? also you want to bring back to the econamy right?" "Pinkie don't care on the econamy.yes. Also if you are retarded how you got in college?" "Being retared only affect my IQ silly, and since I'm high level that means my IQ is just below average, and it only changes the speed in which I learn, In fact my IQ is even higher then average as I was diagnosed like 18 years ago and back then I was below average, but now I'm even a bit higher then average." "So your saying you raised your IQ points?" "Only a bit, what really helped was the fact everypony get dumber all the time, so the average keeps falling, sadly once you get a diagnosis you are marked for life, but you also get lots of help, it is like a sword that is sharp on both sides so you and the others get hurt." "Pinkie thinks you want to say a double edged sword. yes. Rainbow Dash want to say double edged sword." "No, what is a double edged sword anyway?" "You are resented by Pinkie. yes. you are resented by Pinkie, Rainbow dash." "Well here we are!" "What you talking on? this is just the Cutie Mark Crusaders club house, yes." "Well doh, They gonna help you find your new job." "Last time Scootaloo, eh Ain't going to try to be a lock smith, and eh won't do a clop movie with Sweetie Belle, yha only got one more week in it anyhow, can't yha just wait?" "I wish I could baby... But mommy got a fire that builds up inside her and she need to flame it down, OH!!!" "That just gross." "I AS A NORMAL PONY, AGREE WITH APPLEBLOOM, IT IS, IN FACT, GROSS." "Maybe you should look somewhere else for help. just saying." *gulp* "Where you came from, Twilight Sparkle?" "First of all its Princess Twilight Sparkle, the guardian of all the booze, Second, you really think I will miss the first funny thing you will do?" "Well thanks for following but I'm preety sure I could.." "Ready?" "1." "2." "Three!" "Look out below!!!!!!!!!" "OH!!!!!!!" "Rainbow dash got a hit in her belly from a flying horny filly, Pinkie Finds nothing funny on it. yes." "The Pain... The Pain..." Music by The Bangles Lyrics by Pinkie Pie "You will soon die, end your life, Dashie "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal hemorrhage!! "I know it's ment to be, Dashie. "I watched you when you were sleeping "You belonged to me "Do you feel the pain? "I hope I ain't dreaming, "You will die, "From internal Bleeding!!! "Say your prays, You just met your end! "Your all life so lame "Death will ease the pain "You soon will lose all feelings!!! "Yhaaaa!!!! "Say your prays, You just met your end! "Your all life so weak "Death will end the pain "You soon will lose all feelings!!! "Yhaaaa!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming... "I hope it the causing, of internal bleedddd!!!!!!!!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, Dashie "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you live the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal bleedinggggg!!!!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, Dashie "I could feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the end?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, ooooffff internal bleeding!! "You just die now, give up your life, Dashie "I could feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the end?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal bleeding!! "I'm fine, I just got hit on the belly." "Curses, Pinkie wanted to grind you to rainbow dast." "I just got an Idea, we must go!" "Where you taking Pinkie? Put Pinkie down!!!" "Would you please revoke the punishment babe?" "NO!!!" "Why you took Pinkie to Cloudsdale?" "Trust me Pinkie you will love it!" Said Rainbow dash the great as the landed smoothly on the front door of the Rainbow Factory, A peguses look alike of Pinkie Pie came to greet them, only that she was white with yellow mane. "You do know you don't have to say everything that is happening, Right ex boss?" Said the Factory Engineer. "Well this is weird, also I got a name you know, it's Surprize, use it" "How could I use it? I have no idea what it is." "You Fool!!! her name IS SURPRIZE!!!!" "Thats why I can't use it, I don't know what it is since it's a surprize, doh." "I sure don't miss thous moments from the time she was in charge." "What evil deeds you did to deserve such curel fate?yes.Pinkie demands to know." "Well it was part of a program to fit in mentally challenged ponies in the work place, and they decided that it will be best to also place the mentally disabled pony as the one officially in charge, so they will get all the blame in case somepony would to found out what we did here, in the end we don't need to worry on it due to Rainbow's freak out in the grinder room, talking on a happy mishap, so she got sacked." "So your saying I wasn't picked cause of my abillities? but only as somepony to blame everything on in case every thing went bad?!!" "Abillities?! hahahaha thats rich, and yes, you were our scapegoat." "I'm Not a Goat!!! And Let me tell you...!!!" "Shut up Dash, yes. You intrigue Pinkie, What things you did here? also Pinkie wants to know more on this Grinder room, yes.Pinkie wants to know on the grinder room." "Well it just were we used to grind fillies to rainbows, and that is the bad things we did here, grinded lots of ponies to a horrible fate when all we really needed was to grind up photos and craones." "You used to grind up ponies? as in killing them?" "Yes.... why you give me that face?" "Pinkie Pie is so excited, yes. she will go to work here and she will grind up all the ponies she hates, which is everypony, hehehehehehe,Pinkie hates everypony,yes." "You know we stoped doing that right? but we do have a job opening, but it's only to diagnosed psycos." "PInkie will take it!!!yes.a place like this will only have good jobs." "Thats great to hear, I will go get the papers and you will be our new snow flake conter! won't that be fun? you will sit all day in a chair, counting tiny snow flakes one by one, it will be great!" "Why you look like that Pinkie?" "Pinkie may have made a mistake, yes.But Pinkie will come thought, and will take the job.yes.Pinkie will sit in the side, hopeing that one day they will return the grinding, and Pinkie will be there to do them all, hehehehehe.Pinkie is happy to go back to the work force, yes... thats why Pinkie is happy, yes." THE END(untill next chapter) The Thunder From Down Under"Pinkie thinks your titles are getting worse, yes." "I agree with Pinkie." "My titles are great, girls, they ran on the fine line of showing and telling." "Pinkie don't understand what the rainbow mane one says, yes." "You know how in stories you need to show, not tell?" "Yes. Pinkie is aware of that concept, yes. Pinkie is aware of it." "Well I try to stay on the show part, you know?" "You know this is a story, right?" "Yes...." "So you see the problem?" "No...." "Everything here is based on text, there is no way to show, only tell, there for you can't show, and only can tell, and that deny you from following the 'show, don't tell' rule." "Pinkie disagree on that, but just for fun, Yes, the drunk purple one is right." "But that is not fair." "That is life in a oat shell for you." "So no matter how I try I could never be good?" "Make that two oats shells." "Hey there!! I won't wait for you all day long, GET IN THE VAN!!!" "What was that?" "That is just Pinkie's ride to her new job, yes. He is not a very nice pony, and Pinkie needs to pet the cat all the way to the rainbow factory." "Why you need to pet the cat?" "That's cause the cat owns the van and pays the rent." "What?! How a cat do that?" "The cat is a doctor, yes. Pinkie thought you know." "Well I really need to see that cat..." "I'm Leaving if you don't come here right now!!!!" "Well Pinkie don't want to be late on her first day, yes. Goodbye every pony." And with that Pinkie Pie left the library and got in the van, as the van flew away the door was closed. "You really need to stop doing that, I guess I could try to open your head and..." Suddenly there was a knock on the door "Would you shut up? Who is it?" There's no answer "Who is it?" There's no answer "Who is it?!!!!!!" Their not saying anything "Oh I give up." "Your not going to open the door?" "No." "Why?" Lyrics by Twilight Sparkle Music by Men At Work "You really going to do a song now? you know you just killed it for any pony else right on the start, we can only do one song for chapter, that's our budget." "Shut up and let me sing." "Why should I care who's behind my door, "They go away, and never come here no more, "I was up late last night, "I'm still very tired, nor I feel right, "I do my best when I'm alone, "As I said, Don't you invade my home, "It's best if they just stay outside, "If they come in, I will run and hide, "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why they are knocking at my door? "Can't they see the sign, leave me all alone, "If they know, that I'm right here, "They might come, and want to stay, "I have done no harm, by keeping to myself, "I'm happy with the state of my mental health, "I like it here with all my friends, "Whisky bourbon, Scotch Irish, "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "If it's a mare that will take me away? "Will she follow me? "Wish the future I could see, "I see just fantasy, "Oh, Who can it be now? "I'm all worked up now! "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Oh, Who can it be now? "Oh, yeah, Who can it, Who can it "Oh, Who can it be now? "Oh, Why I care now?" Lyrics by ????? ????? Music By Men At Work (Again, but different song) "Traveling in a stinking suit, "With no booze not much to glut, "So I came to a strange lady, she will make me nervous, "She should take me in and make me some breakfast, "Cause I Do come for the land down under! "Where mares chug while others slumber, "You will hear, you will hear the thunder! "You better run, when I seek shelter!" "Went to a public library, "Right here in tiny ponyville, "When I will ask the mare if she can feed me, "She will smile and dishes a disgusting sandwich, "And She'll say, So you come from the land down under? "Where beer flows and mares plunder? "I can hear, I can hear the thunder! "You can stop, you found your cover, "I can smell the liquor cabinet, "I can hear you put the locks on it right away, "You think you could try and tempt me? "Cause I come from the land of plenty! "As I said, I come from the land down under! "Where Mares snore and others shatter, "You hear, you hear the thunder? "I start to run, so I find cover! "Cause I live in a land down under, "Where mares roar while others slumber, "I hear, I hear the thunder, "I'm so lucky, that I got cover, "Cause I come from a land down under, "Where beer flows and mares chunder , "Can you hear, can you hear the thunder, "I stop run, I got cover, "Living in the land down under, "Is so much fun, when you don't slumber, "You can hear, you can hear the thunder, "That the sign to run and find cover! "Living in a land down under." "Berry Punch, Why didn't you said it was you, you dirty old rat?" "I can't put a show now you filthy twat?" "Who is she?" "Rainbow Dash meet Berry Punch, The mare who showed me how to drink when I was 8," "Nice to meet you, WAIT, she helped you do underage drinking?!!" "Well I am a year younger then Twilight Drunkle here, she started late, that's all, I began drinking at the fine age of 4." "WHAT?!!" "Ignore her, Berry Punch, what brings you here?" "Crikey, I just came to meet my old shila, and maybe chug a bit while we put oats on the barbi," "What she said?" "Here take this dictionary it could help you." "What is it? Aussie - English Canterlot Dictionary," "Just read it," "I bet you excited for your first day of work, you remembered to have the cloud walking spell casted on you I trust." "Yes, Pinkie remembered to have the spell casted on her, yes. Pinkie is not a dumb horse." "That is great, we are putting hard floors right now so you won't really need it, but we didn't got to cover all the places you will go to during a working day." "And what places Pinkie should go to in a working day? yes." "Oh nothing special, just your work station, bathrooms, dining room and the hallways, You can trust me, every pony know Surprise is the best supervisor, also like my name, I made you a surprise!!" "What is that surprise?" "I made you a song, it got cool lyrics, and it talks on your working day, also it got really good music so you can remember it and it uses the big shift bell as part of the score too, I think it starts right now!" Lyrics by Surprise Music by AC\DC "We make rolling thunders, a pouring rain. "We bring in the hurricane, "Our lighting flashes across the sky, "Stick to the rules, and you won't die, "We don't take prisoners, We spare all lives, "No pony is putting up a fight, "Listen to the bell, it tells you when to work, "The work is safe, I can tell you, "Work bell, "Yeah, work bell, "I am the one to ring the work bell, "When the work rising, work bell!!" "I got pink sensations, Up and down my spine, "You should know evil is a good friend of mine, "I will make pink lightings that will crack the sky, "If Tia is over there, that's where I Strike, "I don't take prisoners, no soul I spare, "Every pony will put up a fight!, "Listen to my bell, it tell you when to run, "Work not safe, now that I'm around! "Kill bell, "Yeah, kill bell, "I will bring the killing bell. "When I ring it, kill bell!!" "Yeow, "Work bell, work is coming to you!, "Kill bell, don't tell me what to do," "Work bell, That's what I'm here to do." "Work bell, you won this time." "Work bell, I could taken you down." "Work bell, stop dragging me around." "Work bell, do the job right." "Work bell, I won't put up a fight." "Work bell." "I say I still can drink more and hold better my booze!" "Stop being silly, I'm the princess of drinking for pony sake!" "I say your just don't want to share your booze with me cause you know I will drink it all." "Stop being silly I got enough booze to kill a medium town." "well the I challenge you to a music drink off!!" "You know I will win right?" "What's a music drink off?" "I have no idea." "I know what it is." "So what do you say? we drink and play, first one to miss a note loses." "I'm sorry I'm worthless to the story, or to life." "Just to show you how much better I am I will play the lead guitar in your nation drinking song!" "Well I take the drums, playing guitar drunk is too easy, try to keep the beat while drunk!" "This is going to be so epic..." "What is that song anyway?" Lyrics by Berry Punch and Twilight Sparkle Music by AC\DC "TWILIGHT!" "SPARKLE!" "BERRY!" "PUNCH!" "TWILIGHT!" "SPARKLE!" "BERRY!" "PUNCH!" "CHUG!" "CHUG!" "I seem caught, "In the middle of the group of your friends," "PUNCH!" "I look around' "To see there's no turning back," "SPARKLE!" "My mind racing, "Think of all the things I could do," "PUNCH!" "And I know, "There is no help, no help for you," "SPARKLE!" "The beat of the drums, "Burns in my heart, "The Thunder of home "Keeps me alive "You'll be - Berry Punched!" "Went down a bottle, "I'll brake your limit, hit you home, "Went through Celestia, yes Celestia, "Do I made my point? "Drink every day, "A bottle each day just keep me sane, "I had to learn to keep it in, "Yeah, yeah, she ,she, she broke my mind, "You should be shaking at the knees, "Can you fill my drink, please? "I think I'm too kind, "You'll be - Twilight Smashed, Twilight smashed, "Yeah, yeah, yeah Twilight smashed, "Oh, Twilight smashed, Yeah." "I no shaking on my knees, "Could you fill my drink please? "Berry Punched, Berry Punched, "Yeah, yeah, yeah Berry Punched, "Berry Punched, yeah, yeah, yeah, "You see, I'm alright, "I'm doing fine." "I'm, I'm alright, ""Also, doing fine." "So fine." "Berry Punched, yeah ,yeah, yeah," "Twilight smashed.""Berry Punched.""Twilight smashed." "Whoa baby babe Berry Punched," "You'll be, Twilight smashed,""Berry Punched." "Twilight smashed.""Berry Punched." "You been, Twilight Punched." "It seem we matched, just drink and last mare to puke?" "Sure." "The Work is so not for Pinkie, yes. Pinkie Can hear them sing," Lyrics Pinkie Pie Music AC\DC "Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, "This just is so annoying, "I just sit and count the snow, "I want to take all I can get, "You know what I mean, "There is deadly to the left of me, "Deadly to the right, "It is no gun, "It is no knife "But it will make due, "Cuz I'm Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode! "I'm dirty, mean, and mighty unclean, "I'm a wanted mare, "Public enemy number one, "Understand? "So lock me up, "In a padded room, "Throw the keys, "And run for your life, "The Pink is back in town, "Don't you mess around, "Cuz I'm Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode! "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, work, work, work "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode!" "Hay Pinkie, keep it down, other ponies are trying to work here," "Sorry Supervisor Surprise, Pinkie will be quiet, yes." "I think we drunk too much, I no feel good." "I agree, it see there is too much drinking." "Why she called Punch anyway?" "Should I show her?" 'Be my guest." "What you ... Ouch!!!!, why you punched me for?" "She is the best Puncher in all of down under, as a foal she pouched her dad cold," "Yah, he is still very proud of it, I feel like I'm on the roadway to pony heck." Lyrics by Berry Punch and Twilight Sparkle Music by AC\DC "Easy drinking, drinking free, "One way ticket to lose my mind, "Ask nothing, enjoy the ride, "Drinking everything with pride, "Don't need reason, just liver time, "It's the thing I love to do, "Drinking hard, Going down, "I'll see my dead friends soon," "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "We walk down the way to heck," "No stop sign, not my booze, "No pony stop me drunk, "Like a wheel, head is spinning, "I think I messed it around, "Hay Mommy, me gonna puke, "I don't feel so good, "Hay dada, look at me, "I drunk more then you" "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "Owwww" "I'm on the highway to heck, "Low way to hell," "We on the roadway to heck, "On speedway to beck," "Highway to beck, "We on something to crap," "Roadway to heck, "Walk way to check," "Momma, Walk way for check, "And we going down....""All the way." "That was great babe, but can I do a song now I'm free again?" "Run Berry, Run..." Lyrics by Scootaloo Music by AC/DC "She is a fast machine,I keeps my motor clean, "She's the best darn mare I have ever seen, "She got bloodshot eyes, telling me no lies, "Knocking me out with those Equestrian thighs, "She drank more then her share, she is fighting for air, "When you told me to come I was already here, "I made the walls start rocking, the earth was bucking, "My mind is aching, cause you just do it, "And you, took me all night long, "Yeah you, took me all night long, "Working double time, on the production line, "You one of a kind, make me work, all time, "Want no beards, just another shot, "Make a meal outta me and come back for more, "You so cool to drink another round, "You chug it down and back in the ring, "The walls start rocking, The earth is bucking, "My mind is racing, can we make it, "And you, took me all night long, "Yeah you, took me all night long, "Knock me out, I say, "You took me all night long, "You want me shacking and you take me all night long, "Yah you took me, "When you shook me, "You really shook me as you took me all night long, "Ohhhhhhh you took me all night long, "Yeah, yeah, you took me all night long, "It really got me when it took me all night long, "Yes you shook me, "When you took me all night long.." "I'll give it a pass." THE END(I wish) Shy one's gig"That was a long break, what in the hay happened?" "If Pinkie knew better yes. she would say the writer had an internal struggle cause Rae started doing videos of us again, then a pink nightmare came to him and demanded a new chapter, in exchange she let him keep his sanity, yes." "Or he missed one date then got out of his roll and went dry." "Like that will happen." *Gulp* "He would had some brain juice till almost deadly level and would get ideas back for new chapters." "Maybe he don't want to get drunk in order to write a story and the last huge chapter dried him out, as well as that he got lots of final tests to study for now and could be using his time in more productive ways." "What is that nonsense that yellow one is talking? stop her right now, her words needs to be revenged. yes." "I know Pinkie is crazy, and agreeing with her should make me question my own sanity but I have to agree with her this time. lets use the evil stick thing on Thunderthigh." "If you will have your way with her please try to lower damage to her hide, Pegasie skin is all the rage now." "I'm sorry for talking and I deserve everything you will do to me." "Stop that talk!" "Yah, Nopony will hurt Fluttershy on my watch!" "I'm sorry you have to defend me." "You shouldn't be sorry, Fluttershy." "Your a great pony Flutters." "I'm sorry." "There is no reason to be sorry sugar cube." "Sorry." "Stop being sorry, I won't let my mare friend be sorry for things she don't need to be." "Say what now?" "That is new." "Please say she didn't just..." "Made this a ship fic? hehehehe, Pinkie thinks Rainbow Dash just did. yes. Pinkie Thinks silly Rainbow Dash just made this a ship fic." "There is a ship here? how? we are not even near the sea. is it a land ship?" "I'm sorry Dash loves me in that way." "That way? there are ways to love?" "Pinkie is confused, Yes.... That is uncommon." "Well this seems like a good time to tell you all to leave my home." "But we are not in your home." "I'm a princess now, every where is my home, now leave!" "Grumpy." "So Fluttershy, what we need is to raise your self worth. best way is to work on your weak parts, now, what you don't like in yourself?" "Can I say everything?" "No hun, cause then we will never get somewhere." "Oh, I'm sorry." "You shouldn't be sorry, you know what I do when I feel blue?" "Your always blue, that's your color." "I don't mean like that..." "I'm sorry." "Anyway I love to get fancy stuff for myself, make me feel all nice and help me forget I'm a loser." "I can't afford fancy stuff. I'm sorry." "And why you think that?" "Well, all my income is from welfare and almost all I got go to my animal friends, and the little I got left covers my food, I can allow myself a house only cause it's from public security and no one else wants it cause its right next to the everfree so I get it for free with even a small income that helps cover the bills, I don't get any bits from giving pets for adoption cause I give them free so ponies won't think of them as toys or tools, I haven't used toothpaste in months now and I just rub dirt on my teeth cause I can't even afford toothpaste." "Now I know that can't be true cause Colgate, the town dentist, gives away toothpaste like its air or something, that girl really should have her brand by now." "I'm too shy to get toothpaste from Colgate. sorry." "Well then we should get you a job, and I know how!" "Sorry for asking but how?" "With a montage with old time rock music in the background and really bad lyrics that will just say what we are doing." "You can do that?" "Yes." "Ok then." Lyrics by Rainbow Dash Music by Bachman Turner Overdrive "You get up every morning, feeling pretty lonely, "Then you make your way to ponyville. "There's Twilight drinking there, Rarity say this, and Pinkie doing that, "And girl, I sure look pretty. "But if you get a job, you won't care for all that, "You will work your brain out for bread, "If you get annoyed, let at me, it gets worse, "Only AJ work at nothing all day." "Hay I'm Taking care of business, every day, "Bucking apple trees every day, "It's really hard work, try it out, "Bucking apple trees and no pay for overtime, workout." "I just see you sleeping, think your a musician, "They work when they are mellow, "If you think you'll go far? with your second hoof bass. "Then your hanging with the wrong bunch of fellows," "That sounds like fun, just lying in the sun, "Could I get a job at doing that? "Can I avoid all the work and call myself a self employed? "Work at writing songs all day?" "But its pretty hard work, you should know." "Put together chords, all the day." "I can do that, should be fun." "You still won't get pay for over time, baby." "I take good care for my business, "I never go away, not a day!" "I'll get up everyday, with purpose for my day, "I won't even want to sleep in. "No need to meet ponies, always pushing, always shoving, "Oh boy! I won't need to look pretty." "You will see me having fun, just lying in the sun, "Doing a job I really love, "I'll get a second rate guitar, I know I will go far, "I love you, you great bunch of fellows," "And I will be playing every day, all the day, "Play the day away, every day, "I will get to do some art, I like that, "I don't need no pay for overtime, got it right." "Play the day away, "Playing everyday, "Play the day away, "Playing everyday." "Play the day away, every way, "Play all the day, every day, "Playing everyday, It all mine, "Play the day away, working overtime." "Play the day away. "Playing all the day, "I'll be taking care of business, "I'll earn my living in my own way!" "Play the day away, "Play all the day, "Playing everyday." "Well that was easy," "I want to do music." "I thought getting a job for Fluttershy would be harder, or at least longer." "I can do great music." "We got that hun." "I'm going to do music." "Relax Fluttershy, you made your point, do you even know how to play?" "That don't matter, I can sing." "I think she is getting a big full of herself." "I will be a great singer." "If only we know a professional singer to take her down a peg." "I will be the best singer in the world." "I come to prove that Pinkie is the best, yes. meet Pinkie Pie's sister, Maud Pie. yes.meet Pinkie's sister Maud." "Hi Maud. what you doing?" "You fool!!, Can't you see Maud is the famous singer from the famous band ,'the mating revolvers'? yes." "What up you b**** f***** m*****f**** **** ******** ********? can't b****** you f****** see that I'm m*****f**** the big c**** around this f***** r***** place n*****?" "What was all that bleeping?" "Oh yes, Maud is forced by law to wear an automatic speech censor, every time she says something that is 'soul damaging' this thing bleeps her, she broke 3 today already, and it's only the afternoon, hehehehehe." "I'm going to be the best singer in the world." "Oh ******* hell you ****** ****** ******** won't! who you the f****ing stupid dumbass nincompoop half wit dip shit dimwit retard think you are?" "That's number 4!" TO BE CONTINUED...
A Fresh Start""What is that foolish name? Yes, since when we need a new start? Pinkie does not approve of it!" "Well, Pinkie Pie, This is a new format, so we kinda have to start from nothing, said Rainbow Dash the Awesome pegasus" "Well, technically this isn't a new format, we did fan fiction when we switched to the Rainbow Dash Presents Videos, also, did you just narrated yourself? That’s just weird" "Of course I narrated my self Twilight. How else would the reader will know who is talking?" "I do want to be rude, yes, so I need to point out the writer is coloring out lines in different colors, yes, each color fits only one pony, hehehehe" "How do you know what the writer is doing? It makes no sense." "Girls, where our bodies?" "Shut up Tunderthigh. Nopony likes you!!" "Sorry" "I said shut up!!!" "Pinkie must say, yes, that the shy yellow one has got a point, yes. We seem to be just voices in the writer’s mind" "Well what do you want? We didn't even started to picture the world, so we are still just concepts, floating around his mind" "How long do you reckon till we’ll be back in full form? I hate to do apple bucking this way" "I donno Applejack, Its really depends on how long he can drag this part I think" "And how you know that? You got special powers now?" "Nooo, I just am the story teller, so I got to do all those explanations" "Who made you the story teller? Pinkie will do much better job then you, yes, why she isn't the story teller?" "Cause..." "Cause what? Tell Pinkie, yes, Tell Pinkie now!!!" "Cause It's RAINBOW DASH presents, not Pinkie Pie presents, doh" "Pinkie Pie Presents would be 10 times better then Rainbow Dash Presents, yes! They are trying to push down my talent, yes!" "Well I think Rarity Presents would be better." "Good Joke Rarity. If you do presents then we will never leave your bedroom, yes." "Just so you know there is more to courtship then what happens in the bedroom, though that thing don't need to be in the bedroom per say, or even while lying down if you got the right stallion..." "I'm confused, what is Rarity talking about?" "Hehehe, Silly Rainbow Dash, She don't know the meaning or hoof fighting, yes." "Well I’m back"*Gulp* "And where have you been?" "I'm an alcoholic who don't give a damn, where you think I been? I went to raid the liquor cabinet"*gulp* "You do know that’s stealing right? And there are fillies in here!" "How can you tell? We’re all just lines on screen, plus I need my buzz if I’m gonna be hanging with you simpletons again" *Gulp* "I AM A NORAML PONY. AND AS SUCH I FEEL VERY NORMAL IN THIS FORM" "Well I don't. This is too creepy. I want my old body back, now I feel sorry for all the chickens we beheaded back in the farm" "You know what I figured out? Now I am inside and all over all of you and you all are inside of OH Scootalo!!!" "That’s Disgusting." "More like disturbing." *Gulp* "Alright, its time to get our bodies back." "Hehehe, Pinkie Pie did much weirder things then this, yes." "This was a normal day in Ponyville, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and Rainbow Dash was going to meet her good friend Pinkie Pie." "Wait, why Pinkie Pie don't got a body yet but Rainbow Dash does? Yes." "That’s Cause your a ghost silly, don't you remember the end of Bittersweet?" "Since when we have continuity in this thing?" "Since forever I guess? The hole in the Haunting Nightmare was seen in A Day in Equestria." "Yes, but that was the only time there was continuity, yes, and Pinkie Pie can prove that." "Well, do try, but I think you will fail, Rainbow Dash Presents is pretty air tight." "Well, if it was so, then how did you fly After My Little Dashie, yes. In the end of that you were too fat to fly and Fluttershy was left in the other world, yes, but she was seen on Bittersweet, yes." "Well I guess your right then, Pinkie Pie is back to being alive." "I do not love that god power you got, yes, but it is good to be back in my old body, yes. Where are the rest?" "Well, a lot changed, Rarity is gone, that’s a good start." "How Rarity is gone?" "Well she spent the night with this pony, and he was sick, and then she got sick..." "Then she dropped dead right? Hehehe." "Well, no, Cause then they made a drug that cured pony AIDS, but it was too expensive..." "So she couldn't afforded it and died right?" "Well she spent the night with the doctor who made the drug and she got it for free and was cured, but then the doctor got very sick and died, and Rarity went to court and was charged with murder using lady parts, then she was sent to jail." "That is the dumbest thing I ever heard, yes! And I heard dumb things, Rarity is here with us, yes." "I got a body, now lets use it." "It seems Pinkie Pie got the same god power that Rainbow Dash has, yes. I wonder... Rainbow Dash starts hitting herself!" "Ouch, That’s not fair Pinkie Pie, ouch, what I did to you?" "Your mere existing angers Pinkie, yes. Why you hitting your self, Dash? Why are you hitting your self? Hehehe" "Rainbow Dash stops hitting herself, and don't you dare do that again Pinkie!" "You don't get to tell Pinkie what to do, now where is drunk purple pony thing?" "She’s dead, she did something in chemistry while being drunk and died in a very painful way." "I don't approve, purple pony is here, I need her to be my victim, also she got wings now! Yes." "Where am I? And why I got wings again? And where’d my booze went?" "You are here cause Pinkie called you, yes, and the wings are just to drive you crazy, wings drives pony crazy, yes." "Well I'm going back home to get up on my drinking, and if you dare to follow me I will do the thing with the stick Celestia showed me, and you don't want that." "Who needs her anyway. Now where is shy yellow one?" "Fluttershy? She’s locked up in a mental ward after cutting me with a chainsaw." "Rainbow Dash, you confused with series, and of such different nature. Your head is very weird place, yes, weird yellow one is here, yes." "I'm sorry, I should have been the same as the other series." "Don't worry Fluttershy, it's ok, you don't have to be mean." "Silence!!! Yellow shy one is away now, and to make things short, yes, also country stinky pony and three crazy fillies are here too, and in future everypony we need is just here, and no pony got god powers anymore, yes." "Why you took my god powers? It was so much fun." "Cause only Pinkie should have god powers, cause she will abuse them, yes." "But you don't got them anymore." "What do you mean? Sure Pinkie have god powers." "No, You said nopony got god powers, so you don't have god powers too." "Rainbow Dash is hit by a giant hummer!" "See? Nothing happened." "Curses!! Pinkie was fooled, this will not be the end! Yes." "Well it kinda is, Soo THE END." THE END "I forgot to do a song!!" "Since when we do a song?" "It’s kinda our thing, you know?" "And how you plan to do a song in this format? Yes." "I’ll do what you did in cupcakes, I will steal a known song and change the lyrics." Music by Spice Girls Lyrics by Rainbow Dash "Wait? Spice Girls? That’s not going to end well." "Shhhh, it’s starting" "I'll Tell you what I want, what I really really want!!!" "Don't tell me what you want, cause I really don't care." "I will still tell you what I want, what I really really want." "If you go on like this, I'll drink myself to death." "I want love, I want food, I want fame, I want hope, and I really really want a nice hug..." "Please some one make her stop, I can't take it anymore." "If she keeps on like that, my head will sure explode!" "This will stop right now, it's gone for much to long." "It is good timing, why didn't you thought of it before?" "Why you stopped the music Spike?" "What it’s really going to get any better?" "Nooo, its Spice Girls, there is a reason why nopony wants them to regroup." "So this is it? This is the last time we will be alive? Yes." "Nooo, It is just a start, there will be more, it’s going to be slice of life kinda thing now, so we can go on forever." "I'm hoping my liver won't last that long." "In the rate your drinking, you won't need to wait much longer, yes." "Sooooooo, The End" THE END(not really).
The Day Of The Dash"What is this foolish name? yes, Pinkie Demands to know!" "Well I wanted a title that will bring ponies to read this, so this one stalion told me on a crazy show, and they did like a fan service thing under a very similar title, I thought if I will use it ponies will read this." "Dash You fool!!! It will just confuse everypony and you just don't do that, yes, beside, we don't have fans." "Well I already did it so lets start with the story ok?" It was a sunny day in Ponyville, the birds were tweeting, the sky were clear and you could see the sun in all its glory, though you shouldn't look at the sun directly as you can lose your sight, then you have to do some eye surgery, and its really scary, I should know, I was forced to do like 7 times on both eyes, they always say "Dash, you can't look at the sun all the time, you will fry your brain and your health care won't pay if you gonna lose your eye sight again" but what they know, its really pretty and it makes me feel happy and worm inside, but I didn't needed more surgerys after AppleJack gave me a pair of really cool dark glasses that make me look better when the sun looks back at me, I really don't know why it works but I guess.... "SPIKE!!!! where is my brandy bottle? I can't stand liseaning to Rainbow Dash all the time, I tell you this new format is killing me." "Coming, coming, Didn't we agreed you will lay down the hard drop now? you really can't keep going like this." "I am giving up drinking, I swiched from whisky to brandy didn't I? and its hard, brandy is such a sissy drink, I want whisky soo badlly now." "Well I don't see how thats an improvement..." Then Spike coughed and a green fire ball came out, bringing a scroll with it "You know I can see it myself, I tell you one of these days." Twilight took hold of the scroll with her magic and started reading it "Do you HAVE to say everything I do? now lets see, mmm , makes sense she will ask me to do that, ah ah, mm mm, WHAT? SHE CAN'T BE SERIOUS!!" Spike Coughed yet another scroll, and like before, Twilight picked it up and read it "So she IS serious, SPIKE, I NEED 10 gallons of the worst Whisky, NOW!!!" "Come on, how bad it can be" "Take a look." "Ok, mm, teaching, not far fetched, mmm, Teach who?? ok, this is bad, I will go bring that whisky." "So, You all probably wander why I brought you three here today." "Wow, your good, Its like you can read my mind." "Rainbow Dash, You are resented by Pinkie, yes." "Did anypony saw how good Twilight looks with wings? OH!" *Gulp* "Well not that you will care but Dear Princess Celestia thought I should teach you group of half baked ponies some history and see what I could learn from it, she also ordered me to film it and give you all 10 custard pies each, but since I know how That will end up I went on a limb and decided to skip on that part, well I don't see any reason to wait with the suffering so lets start." "Twilight then turnd to write on the board." "Shot Up Rainbow!" "Twilight called behind her back." "Oh my, would you look at that plot, I bet its hard as rock, I can almost hear it calling to me, its the siren call, OH!' "Would you two silence yourselfs, Pinkie wants to learn! yes." "Since when you like to study? I thought you were all about pranking and such." "And how can you concentrate when you got such lovely round firm plot infront of your very hungry eyes..." "I can as foolish world left his weakness in the past, learning them will help Pinkie in her Quest for world domantion!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!, yes, no, its just very interesting, yes, thats is why Pinkie wants to learn, forget the part on global conquest, yes, forget part on global conquest." "So After the great Banana Suit Crisis..." "Scootalo, what you say we leave this place and go play some air ball outside?" "I would love to, but I got to stay here in case I will get some private teaching with the HOT teacher!" "I thought you didn't wanted to learn." "I still need some private time with miss hot Sparkle here, maybe in her bedroom, some private teaching in PR class, maybe I could show her some of my workouts. OH!" "You are a bore, Scootalo, What about you Pinkie Pie?" "You are truely a fool if you believe that annoying the pink will benefit you Rainbow Dash." "This is just great, I'm Stock here in the boring class with nothing to do, I wish there was a song at least." "I believe I got something to help you on that, Twilight!" "What you want? and why can't you leave me alone?" "Why I would want to leave such a pretty sexy mare? and could you play the electric guitar?" "Well I guess that If I use my magic I could play pretty good while getting up on my drinking..." "Thats so sweet, now, PInkie!" "What you going to pester Pinkie with now?" "You will play the bass, everypony know the bass players are insane." "I don't think thats how it works..." "You get to play the keyboard Rainbow Dash!" "Oh my, thats so cool! thanks Scootalo!" "So Pinkie is guessing you play the drums then? yes." "Why no, I'm the lead singer! Rarity is the drumer!" "Why would Rarity do the drumming? Pinkie would hate to know how she will use the drum sticks. yes." "Well Just so you know that I learnd how to give a good rhythm, Its very importent in my field you know." "Well this will end well" *gulp* Music by Van Helen Lyrics by Scootalo "Aw Wow, mare Gimme A sec Twilight is so hot with wings it seems, OOOOOHHHH!!!! OHHH YAH!!!!!!!!!!! Twi Twi Twilight, Please show me more plot! When you turn around to teachhhh, I'm already in hell, Cause I can't have my way with you in this school!!! I Think of all the plot within my reach! But my teachers were never quite hot like this!!! I am Bad, You Like Bad, I am Bad!! I'm hot for Twilight!!!! She's Just Hot!!! Dumm Hot!!!! I'm hot for Twilight!! I thought you missed me so i'm back! I Brought my TOY!!! And Another mare to join us!! OHHHH!!!! I just love your lessons, When you write on the board, I can see right in you!!! Drunk mare from Canterlot, How can you be so hot! I want to be wraped around you.... I think of all the plot withing my reach! But my teachers were never quite hot like this!! I Am Bad, You Like Bad, I Am Bad!! I'm hot for Twilight!! She's just hot!!! dumm hot!!! I'm hot for Twilight!!! OH mare, where did to go?! I wanna feel dirty I'm In Bliss!!! I am bad, You want bad, I am bad, I'm hot for Twilight!!!" "The end Is Neigh!!!" "I Think I'm done!!!" THE END(not really)
The Group Photo"You know what we need for this story?" "Again, I don't care! would you leave my library now?" "We need some sort of a image that will drew ponies in our story, it is ridiculous, We are over 3,000 words in, 100% love and just barely past 100 views, not to say all the comments were made by 2 ponies, one of them is the writer!" "What is ludicrous is that you insist on staying on my library regardless my demanding for your departure!" "Maybe I would do something if you talked in English!!" "I am talking in English, do simple Dash have trouble understanding my words?" "Well, yha, I would love it if you could explain them." "Well ludicrous is preposterous." "I still don't understand." "this is absurd!" "Speak English!!" "You know what? GET THE BUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT RETARD!!!???" *Sobs* "No one asked you to be mean, you hurted my feelings, say sorry." *Sobs* "Well I'm sorry that your such a colossal A hole!! NOW GET LOST!!!" "Well" *Sobs* "I got to go to get everypony to come in for the photo anyway" *Sobs* "I will come back later." "NO PONY ASKED YOU TO TAKE A GROUP PICTURE!!!" Rainbow Dash the Awesome flow out of the Golden oak Library and flew to Sweet Apple Acres to talk with Applejack and Applebloom on the group photograph. "Hi Applejack, Could you come to Twilight's house later? I want to take a group Photo for our story." "Well shoot darling I wish I could, but I got so many things to do here and I think I wouldn't make it, I'm sorry..." "Yo Applejack! I got the hose running, can we go do that mud slide thing now? yha know, since we ain't got nothing better to do, Oh Hi Rainbow Dash!!" "Oh Hi Applebloom, I wish I could join you at the mud slide it sounds so fun, But I got to round up all the ponies for a group photo, I asked Applejack to come too but she said you were busy with things." "Well sure we will come, We ain't got nothing better to do, right big sister?" "Shhh, you don't know what jobs we got to do." "What yha Talking bout'? sure I know, We pick apples, not much more work then that, gosh darn it we don't even water the trees, you sure y'all are thinking right?" "You know that Y'all is plural, right?" "So Your coming or not?" "Sure we will come!!!" "Sister I love you very much but sometimes you make me wish you weren't born," *sigh* "Sure Rainbow Dash, we'll come for your photo group." "Thats great guys, well I be going now, see you later!" "SPIKE!!!!!" "What you want now?" "I need you to go to the liquer store and get me all the vodca and whisky they got." "Why you need that? we got plenty of full bottles here." "Well Rainbow Dash had this idea to bring everypony here for a group photo, so I may need all the booze I could get my hooves on." *Twilight opened a whisky bottle* "And I need to get a head start on my drinking." *Twilight started drinking straight from the bottle* "You really don't need to drink that much in order to tolerate them you know." "Who said I drink to tolerate them?" *gulp* "With luck I will be dead or in a coma before anypony will come here." "OK....... well I be heading for the liquer store, see you later...." After Sweet Apple Acres the Amazing Rainbow Dash went to the Carousel boutique. "Rarity!!! Sweetie Belle!!! are you here?" "Oh my! its my favorite Horse around here!!" "Hi Scootaloo, Why you wearing this black suit with metal stads? you look like High Scream on one of his shows" "I been Taking lessons in Hard Love, baby, and Rarity is my teacher, OH!!!" "I Swear It's not how it looks like!!" Rarity came out of the backroom wearing a very weird black string dress and holding a small black whip with her magic, "I say it looks like you been teaching her to behave herself." "I was needed of teaching, Rarity knows what a naughty filly I was, OH!!" "I Swear It was leagl!" "Well I just came to tell you there will be a group photo later and you are invited." "DID I HEARD THERE WILL BE A PHOTO TAKEN? I MUST GET MY OFFCIAL WAR UNIFORM, JUST LIKE A NORMAL FILLY!!!" "Well kids do love to dress up for photoshots, I just need to get more ponies so I be heading out now. bye!" "YOU TWO, RETURN TO YOUR MISCHIEVOUS WAYS, I NEED TO HEAR SCREAMS OF PAIN AS I PUT ON MY SACRED OUTFIT!" *Shrug* "I guess we go on where we stopped?" "Oh Yha!!! I am still a very naughty girl who needs discipline, OH!!" "Thats Great, Cause I got a suprize for you in my room..." "You think Scootaloo will come?" "Who cares? I had a court order to have her in a chastity device for the next month after the incident last time she was here."*hip* "And who going to put it on her? I don't know a pony that will get near that girls genitals." "Rarity said she will handle it," *hip* "I sure hate these wings, Spike, more booze!!" The Next stop was Sugar Cube Corner, Where Pinkie was Puting on a banana suit, "Hi Pinkie, whats up with the funny suit?" "Pinkie Don't need to explain you, yes, PInkie Pie will use her new found knowledge that foolish Twilight has shared to bring down the princesses, then nothing will stand in the way for Pinkie to rule the world!!! yes,nothing will stand in the way" "Well I wanted to say that there will be a group photo later and I want you to join for it." "You fool, why would Pinkie want to be immortalized with your group of ponies?" "Well if you going to act like that then I don't want you in the story image then." "Wait!!, You said story image? as in the first thing ponies will see when they lay their eyes on this story? yes" "Yes.... but you said you don't want to." "Pinkie was wrong, yes, Pinkie will join you at the photo as she no trust you to bring in the ponies, yes" "Well thats a reason to come... I will see you later! bye Pinkie!" "Bye Rainbow Dash ,what Rainbow Dash don't know is that I will use the photo to show Pinkies supremacy over the rest of the ponies, and she will control the minds of all the ponies with her banana suit!,HAHAHAHA!!!" *hip* "I wonder..." "What you wonder Twilight?" *hip* "How painful it will be to bite off the wings..." "I don't think its a good idea." "You Right." * hip* "I'm not drunk enough right now" *hip* Gulp* "Why am I drinking?" *hip* "Oh who cares." *gulp* The last place was Fluttershy house, and The Swift Rainbow Dash Just made it, "Hi Fluttershy!" "Hi Rainbow Dash," "There Will be a Photo shoot in Twilight's house, you want to come?" "Will my uncle will see that photo? I really want my uncle to see me..." "I Don't know, but it will be publicity seen, its the new image for our story," "Ok Rainbow Dash, I will come, I just hope my uncle will see it..." "Sure... Well... I got to go now to be in the photo... so... I will see you there! bye!" "Bye." "Hi Twilight I'm Back, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!!" "What It seem like?" *hip* "I'm tring to bite my wings off, if it wasn't that painfull I would have had a start already, so far I only got some feathers off" *hip* "Hi There, We made it, Can we do it fast now?" "Hi Rainbow, what Twilight doing AJ?" "Twilight is doing some grown up stuff Applebloom, Just Ignore it." Just then Rarity came with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, Rarity was wearing black seethourgh lace socks and had Scootaloo on a leash, Scootaloo was wearing a short skirt that hardly covered a metal apparatus that covered all of her groin area, Sweetie belle was wearing some weird Alian Suit that looked really odd. "Rarity!!! I thought I told you I don't want Applebloom to see what Scootaloo is wearing." "Oh come on, It's kinda cute, she all locked up from grinding on ponies." "How much I love control games Rarity, you really got to let me get free, mama need her fun time, OH!!" "Scootaloo got to wear it cause she humped ponies? why didn't she was just fixed like winnona?" "Well It don't work like that for ponies, and since you know thous things?" "Well It worked good for winnona, I don't see why it won't work for Scootaloo, and I pick things up." "WHY ARE WE WAITING? THE ARMOR SUIT IS HURTING ME! THAT IS NORMAL!" "Pinkie Pie is here, Take the photo while she can stay in the banana suit, Pinkie forgot to use breathable fabric for this suit, it was not a bright idea, yes, Pinkie can see it now." "What are you wearing?" *chewing on wing* "You Look silly." "You won't laugh when PInkie will send you to work on the dirt mine, yes, you won't laugh on the dirt mine." "Well the timer is set, everypony to group together." "Guys I think you closed the door..I can't get in..." "3... 2...1... " *SNAP!!!!!* Then we had our group photo, Twilight was on the left side trying to chew her wing off, right behind her you could see Fluttershy with her head in the window, in the middle I was there, standing happliy with a huge smile on my face, Applejack and Applebloom could be seen arguing in the back, PInkie Pie was jumping in her banana suit between the Apple sisters and Twilight, Rarity was hitting Scootaloo hoof who was tring to fiddle with her chastity belt on the far right and Sweetie Belle was standing near me from the right as well, in her heavy battle armor, standing like a guard, and Spike was standing on the right, with his claw over his face, I think he was ashamed, good photo I would say. THE END(For now)
FanFic Reading #1"Would you believe we got no respond on the last chapter?" "Pinkie is Baffled, yes, Pinkie don't remember that you did anything but post the chapter." "Well, I sent links to all the ponies who did the original series, and nopony replied, It's like no pony cares!!!" "Pinkie don't think that sending links is what going to push your story forward, yes, maybe if you write stories worth reading first ponies will come and read, yes, let the work speek for it self." "But It IS good, everypony who moved their plot and read this agrees, also that don't explain why I sent hundreds of mails and asks to them but never got even ONE REPLY!!!!" "But you are a Fictional character, yes, PInkie don't thinks fictional characters can send mail to flesh and blood ponies, yes, Pinkie have tried to send letters to real ponies before, but the saddle arabian ponies didn't get her mails, Pinkie is most displeased with it, yes." "Why would you write letters to the saddle arabian ponies in the first place anyway?" "Pinkie finds that they could be more evil, yes, they didn't blow up a national monument lately, yes, Pinkie needs them to blow up national monuments." "You know they do video logs on their Ponytube channel." "Where you came from?" "You are at the library." "Thats cause I can't write new chapters at my house." "You know that you can write it offline then come here and upload it and be done in 30 seconds, that way you can write at your own time, and most importantly, You will spend less time annoing me, which will improve your life span immensely." "It's not being online, I got WiFi at my cloud house..." "Then what is it?" "I don't own a good computer, mine keep crashing and jumping." "Pinkie thinks you should get new computer.yes" "Well even with my work at the weather control, and the money from mom and dad I just make it every mounth, rent in Ponyville is very expansive, and cloud homes are very high to maintenance." "Back on topic, they still do Vlogs on the Ponytube, maybe they answered you there?" "Pinkie thought we agreed that Rainbow Dash can't send letters, yes, Pinkie Pie thought we agreed." "Well we also know that Rainbow Dash just express the frustration of the story writer, and to that I say, Did you looked on their Ponytube Channel? maybe they answered you on the 'one on one with rae' vidoes." "Well they should know I have no time to watch it, It's long and boring, it's just rae sitting infront his camare talking on stuff." "Would you stop with the act? we know its not really you." "What Pinkie don't get is what are we doing right now?" "We are doing commentary! like I did on the start of Captian hook the biker gorlia and on the pony fantasy lets play." "Pinkie Pie don't remember that video, also, Pinkie Pie didn't liked that lets play series.yes." "You wouldn't liked that story anyway Pinkie, we just grounded up fillies into rainbows." "......." "Why you giving me that face Pinkie?" "IN WHAT WORLD GRINDING FILLIES INTO RAINBOWS ISN'T SOMETHING THAT PINKIE WOULD WANT TO BE A PART OFF?!!!!! PINKIE IS MAD, yes, PINKIE SHOULD HAVE DONE THE GRINDING, yes, PINKIE LIVES FOR IT!!!!!!!!" "Well I liked the Pony Fantasy game." "Thats because you were the main character, Pinkie didn't got a chance to kill anypony in that game, It's not fair, yes." "I didn't got lot of screen time too, and you don't hear me complain." "You fool, You ran the show, Pinkie only got lines after the middle point, yes." "So thats all? can you go home now? I am getting tired of this stuff." "No silly, we still got to do something, and you know what I found online?" "I'm sure I know but lets play, Want you found?" "I found this great site, called FiMFiction, It got lots of cool stories, maybe we should do vidoes of some of the stories there." "Surly Rainbow Dash isn't serious, yes." "What?" "We did it allready, that was all the basis of the Rainbow Dash Presents." "If that was the basis of Rainbow Dash Presents then why there are only 9 Rainbow Dash Presents?! If we really worked from stories in that site we sould have like a million Rainbow Dash Presents, as there are over a million stories in this site!" "Well not all the stories are well knowen and most of them won't be able to work with our personalitys." "What our personalitys got to do with it? we just need to act you know, you know what? bring all the gang here and I will show you that we can do any story from a group I will pick at random." "This I will want to see, Pinkie, Bring the lame excuse for ponies that Celestia makes be befriend." "Pinkie don't know on what you talking. yes." "I'm Talking on Rarity, Applejack and Buttercry, also bring the three little weirdos." "Guys, I know this will be great, that random group got lots of stories!" "Let me see what group you got... Oh crap." "So why you brought us here again?" "We gonna show Twilight we can do any story from this site I found, and we will start from all the stroies in this group I picked at random!" "I would like to know where they found that photo of me!" "I know, right? It's super cute, look, inside they even got another foal photo, this time of Fluttershy, see?" "I don't know what to say to you honey...." "Bubblethy is not a foal in that photo." "Then how you explain her outfit? and the way she drinks?" "I don't remember taking this photo." "Hehehe, Pinkie thinks you got in the dark side of the site, yes." "Just Look at the title, its says ADULT FOALS and PADDED PONIES, what you think it's on?" "Why that sounds familiar?" "I donno, maybe its on ponies that look very young and love pillows?" "You are silly Rainbow Dash..." "Well here is a story we could try, its called 'Pattycakes' and there are even 3 parts!" "Maybe we should read it all first before playing it out? you know, so there won't be any nasty suprizes." "Good idea, that Cupcakes sure was a suprize for me." 5 minutes later... "I don't feel comfortable with this story..." "Well It really don't make lots of sense... WAIT YOU DO WHAT?!!!" "I'm sorry for my actions in that story..." "Well this ain't making a lick of sense." "Pinkie thinks things will be clear on the next part.." "Well looking at the tabs it seems that we will need Scootaloo for that part. this site is really nice, the stories not so much." "Did somepony said my name?" "Hi sis, what you doing?" "Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, what Y'all doing here?" "JUST LIKE NORMAL PONIES WE FOLLOWED OUR FRIEND SCOOTALOO WITHOUT ASKING, THAT IS NORMAL." "Well Take this Scootaloo, we need you to read it." "Did you printed all the stories?" "Yes.. you forgot the printer open." "Someday I will get you back for it you know..." "What I don't get is why a pony will pee in a diaper when they can have a shower of gold baby, OHH!!!" "Whats a golden shower?" "ME TOO AS A NORMAL PONY, HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS A GOLDEN SHOWER!" "You fools, a golden shower is when you are showerd with all the gold you acquired doring your life." "Won't that hurt?" "More then you think, yes, as they melt the gold first then shower you with the molten gold, it is Pinkies favorite way of execution, yes. "But what if one don't have lots of gold and survives it?" "There are follow ups is you still alive after the gold shower. yes." "AS A NORMAL PONY, I DEMAND TO KNOW, IN GREAT DETAIL, OF THE OTHER WAYS PONIES ARE PUT TO DEATH IN A VERY PAINFUL WAY." "If gold shower don't work, then all the other metals you own are molten and rained on you, yes, and if that won't kill you, then you are cooked in your family soup, yes." "What you mean when you say cooked in our family soup?" "Pinkie will grind all your family into mash, yes, then she will boil that mash with you in it, yes, it is very fun thing to do!" "Well that was distorbing, how about everypony will read lots of stories and then we will pick one together?" "Sounds great, lets do it!" "Pinkie will agree with your plan, yes, but only this one time!" "Ain't got anything better to do." "I will get on it." "Sure, why not." "Mmmmmm, ok.. If you want to." "This group is Stupid!, yes." "What makes you say that?" "90% of the stroies are on you or Twilight, and most of the rest of the shy yellow one, where is the love for Pinkie Pie? yes." "What is weird is that 90% of the stories on me got to do with me being an alicorn and and age spell gone wrong, thats just lazy writing right there." "Well there is this one called the night book that you regress as a way to handle your OCD." "What OCD? any sign of that was long gone from all my drinking." *gulp* "I don't think I can do any of the stories here, it's too embarrassing." "What is embarrassing, Fluttershy?" "I can't wet myself on command..." "Well thats easy all you have to do is.." "STOP!" "What?" "We are not going in there, we will not have a peeing contest." "Now I Remember where I know this..." "Pinkie Pie don't want to know, Rainbow Dash stop this story, yes, STOP THIS STORY RIGHT NOW!!!" "Ok Pinkie, you don't have to yell, I think we should all go home, maybe later I will find a diffrent group and we could try again, ok?" "Could it be a clop fiction group?" "Why there will be a group on ponies running and making sounds with their hooves?" "Clop Fiction is not... well most of the stories in this group are clop... you know what? I give up." *gulp* "Well I be going now everypony, bye." "I'm going too, I got some thinking to do on my life..." "No Pony cares!!!! that Tumbledry, would you believe? wheres Rarity?" "Last I saw her she went to the bathroom." "And that Is the time for Pinkie to leave, Goodbye!" "Goodbye Pinkie, and I guess I will be going too, well, bye!" THE END!(not really) "I think they forgot about us." "HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? WE ARE THREE CUTE FILLIES." "You mean three cute and HOT fillles baby..." "I'm going before it gets awkward" "I WILL COME WITH YOU, JUST LIKE A NORMAL PONY WILL DO." "Guys wait for me!!"
New Line of Work"Would you believe this??!!! I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT!!!!!" *Gulp* "What is it now Rainbow?" "I can't even say it it's so angring!!" "Pinkie never heard of a word such as angring, yes. Pinkie would have rememberd it." "I think she ment irritating, but simple dash don't know fancy words." "I do to know fancy words!" "HAHAHAHA, You crack Pinkie up. yes. Rainbow Dash don't even know how to use proper grammar ,yes. Rainbow Dash don't know how to use proper grammar." "What got your tail in a knot any way?" "It's Fragging Trixie Variety Show. Would you believe they placed The Mentally Advanced series on the front page?" "So your mad that we made it to the front page of the lame website you wanted to be in all this time?" "It's not a lame website, it's THE main website for ponies, and it isn't us who made it to the front page." "Pinkie is confused, yes. Aren't we the Mentally Advanced ponies? yes. Also what is 'fragging'?, Pinkie never heard of such word, yes.Pinkie never heard of such word." "The thing they posted wasn't our Mentally Advanced thing but a new thing from the orignal creator, and Fragging is instead of..." *wisper in Pinkie's ear* "Cause we can't swear here." "Why is this Foolish thing that we can't curse here? who they Fragging think they are? the Fragging pony police? I will teach those ill conceived ponies excuse for defecation who say the final word here, those bucking ponies!!... Curses!!! Now Pinkie here talks all funny. Pinkie can't curse properly." "Well thats not true, I called you a retard." "Well retard isn't really a curse, it is a diagnosis, Like autist isn't realy a curse..." "But I used it as a curse, it got to count." "Well I.... In fact.... Funny thing...." "You are not trying to say you ARE a retard, are you?" "Well I.... am kinda... diagnosed as one..." "I would never have guessed..." "REALLY? I know they told me im an high level retard but I never knew I hid it so well. oh my gosh." "I was being sarcastic you know, the only thing that don't add up is that you are considered High level retard." "They have must set the bar very low for her to be high level, yes. Pinkie will have to see how low it's set." "You are insane, you know that PInkie?" "You may laugh but Pinkie get a fat bits bag every moon due to her diagnosis. yes. Pinkie lives well off her wellfare money." "Why you live off your wellfare money? don't you have a job at the Sugar Cube Corner?" "Pinkie was fired from that job, yes ,Ms Cake wasn't happy for me trying to make cupcakes from her customers, yes ,One time Pinkie forgot to filter the bones and teeth and suddnly 'Your Fired Pinkie!', it is not fair to Pinkie, yes, It is not fair to Pinkie." "Well don't worry Pinkie, I will help you get a new job, you can count on me!!" "This won't end well..." "PInkie don't understand why she need a job,yes.She is doing preety well on her wellfare money." "Well what if you want more spanding money? also you want to bring back to the econamy right?" "Pinkie don't care on the econamy.yes. Also if you are retarded how you got in college?" "Being retared only affect my IQ silly, and since I'm high level that means my IQ is just below average, and it only changes the speed in which I learn, In fact my IQ is even higher then average as I was diagnosed like 18 years ago and back then I was below average, but now I'm even a bit higher then average." "So your saying you raised your IQ points?" "Only a bit, what really helped was the fact everypony get dumber all the time, so the average keeps falling, sadly once you get a diagnosis you are marked for life, but you also get lots of help, it is like a sword that is sharp on both sides so you and the others get hurt." "Pinkie thinks you want to say a double edged sword. yes. Rainbow Dash want to say double edged sword." "No, what is a double edged sword anyway?" "You are resented by Pinkie. yes. you are resented by Pinkie, Rainbow dash." "Well here we are!" "What you talking on? this is just the Cutie Mark Crusaders club house, yes." "Well doh, They gonna help you find your new job." "Last time Scootaloo, eh Ain't going to try to be a lock smith, and eh won't do a clop movie with Sweetie Belle, yha only got one more week in it anyhow, can't yha just wait?" "I wish I could baby... But mommy got a fire that builds up inside her and she need to flame it down, OH!!!" "That just gross." "I AS A NORMAL PONY, AGREE WITH APPLEBLOOM, IT IS, IN FACT, GROSS." "Maybe you should look somewhere else for help. just saying." *gulp* "Where you came from, Twilight Sparkle?" "First of all its Princess Twilight Sparkle, the guardian of all the booze, Second, you really think I will miss the first funny thing you will do?" "Well thanks for following but I'm preety sure I could.." "Ready?" "1." "2." "Three!" "Look out below!!!!!!!!!" "OH!!!!!!!" "Rainbow dash got a hit in her belly from a flying horny filly, Pinkie Finds nothing funny on it. yes." "The Pain... The Pain..." Music by The Bangles Lyrics by Pinkie Pie "You will soon die, end your life, Dashie "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal hemorrhage!! "I know it's ment to be, Dashie. "I watched you when you were sleeping "You belonged to me "Do you feel the pain? "I hope I ain't dreaming, "You will die, "From internal Bleeding!!! "Say your prays, You just met your end! "Your all life so lame "Death will ease the pain "You soon will lose all feelings!!! "Yhaaaa!!!! "Say your prays, You just met your end! "Your all life so weak "Death will end the pain "You soon will lose all feelings!!! "Yhaaaa!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming... "I hope it the causing, of internal bleedddd!!!!!!!!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, Dashie "I can feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you live the pain?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal bleedinggggg!!!!!!! "You just lay down, give up your life, Dashie "I could feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the end?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, ooooffff internal bleeding!! "You just die now, give up your life, Dashie "I could feel your heart beating, all over you "Can you feel the end?! I hope that I ain't dreaming.. "I hope it the causing, of internal bleeding!! "I'm fine, I just got hit on the belly." "Curses, Pinkie wanted to grind you to rainbow dast." "I just got an Idea, we must go!" "Where you taking Pinkie? Put Pinkie down!!!" "Would you please revoke the punishment babe?" "NO!!!" "Why you took Pinkie to Cloudsdale?" "Trust me Pinkie you will love it!" Said Rainbow dash the great as the landed smoothly on the front door of the Rainbow Factory, A peguses look alike of Pinkie Pie came to greet them, only that she was white with yellow mane. "You do know you don't have to say everything that is happening, Right ex boss?" Said the Factory Engineer. "Well this is weird, also I got a name you know, it's Surprize, use it" "How could I use it? I have no idea what it is." "You Fool!!! her name IS SURPRIZE!!!!" "Thats why I can't use it, I don't know what it is since it's a surprize, doh." "I sure don't miss thous moments from the time she was in charge." "What evil deeds you did to deserve such curel fate?yes.Pinkie demands to know." "Well it was part of a program to fit in mentally challenged ponies in the work place, and they decided that it will be best to also place the mentally disabled pony as the one officially in charge, so they will get all the blame in case somepony would to found out what we did here, in the end we don't need to worry on it due to Rainbow's freak out in the grinder room, talking on a happy mishap, so she got sacked." "So your saying I wasn't picked cause of my abillities? but only as somepony to blame everything on in case every thing went bad?!!" "Abillities?! hahahaha thats rich, and yes, you were our scapegoat." "I'm Not a Goat!!! And Let me tell you...!!!" "Shut up Dash, yes. You intrigue Pinkie, What things you did here? also Pinkie wants to know more on this Grinder room, yes.Pinkie wants to know on the grinder room." "Well it just were we used to grind fillies to rainbows, and that is the bad things we did here, grinded lots of ponies to a horrible fate when all we really needed was to grind up photos and craones." "You used to grind up ponies? as in killing them?" "Yes.... why you give me that face?" "Pinkie Pie is so excited, yes. she will go to work here and she will grind up all the ponies she hates, which is everypony, hehehehehehe,Pinkie hates everypony,yes." "You know we stoped doing that right? but we do have a job opening, but it's only to diagnosed psycos." "PInkie will take it!!!yes.a place like this will only have good jobs." "Thats great to hear, I will go get the papers and you will be our new snow flake conter! won't that be fun? you will sit all day in a chair, counting tiny snow flakes one by one, it will be great!" "Why you look like that Pinkie?" "Pinkie may have made a mistake, yes.But Pinkie will come thought, and will take the job.yes.Pinkie will sit in the side, hopeing that one day they will return the grinding, and Pinkie will be there to do them all, hehehehehe.Pinkie is happy to go back to the work force, yes... thats why Pinkie is happy, yes." THE END(untill next chapter)
The Thunder From Down Under"Pinkie thinks your titles are getting worse, yes." "I agree with Pinkie." "My titles are great, girls, they ran on the fine line of showing and telling." "Pinkie don't understand what the rainbow mane one says, yes." "You know how in stories you need to show, not tell?" "Yes. Pinkie is aware of that concept, yes. Pinkie is aware of it." "Well I try to stay on the show part, you know?" "You know this is a story, right?" "Yes...." "So you see the problem?" "No...." "Everything here is based on text, there is no way to show, only tell, there for you can't show, and only can tell, and that deny you from following the 'show, don't tell' rule." "Pinkie disagree on that, but just for fun, Yes, the drunk purple one is right." "But that is not fair." "That is life in a oat shell for you." "So no matter how I try I could never be good?" "Make that two oats shells." "Hey there!! I won't wait for you all day long, GET IN THE VAN!!!" "What was that?" "That is just Pinkie's ride to her new job, yes. He is not a very nice pony, and Pinkie needs to pet the cat all the way to the rainbow factory." "Why you need to pet the cat?" "That's cause the cat owns the van and pays the rent." "What?! How a cat do that?" "The cat is a doctor, yes. Pinkie thought you know." "Well I really need to see that cat..." "I'm Leaving if you don't come here right now!!!!" "Well Pinkie don't want to be late on her first day, yes. Goodbye every pony." And with that Pinkie Pie left the library and got in the van, as the van flew away the door was closed. "You really need to stop doing that, I guess I could try to open your head and..." Suddenly there was a knock on the door "Would you shut up? Who is it?" There's no answer "Who is it?" There's no answer "Who is it?!!!!!!" Their not saying anything "Oh I give up." "Your not going to open the door?" "No." "Why?" Lyrics by Twilight Sparkle Music by Men At Work "You really going to do a song now? you know you just killed it for any pony else right on the start, we can only do one song for chapter, that's our budget." "Shut up and let me sing." "Why should I care who's behind my door, "They go away, and never come here no more, "I was up late last night, "I'm still very tired, nor I feel right, "I do my best when I'm alone, "As I said, Don't you invade my home, "It's best if they just stay outside, "If they come in, I will run and hide, "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why they are knocking at my door? "Can't they see the sign, leave me all alone, "If they know, that I'm right here, "They might come, and want to stay, "I have done no harm, by keeping to myself, "I'm happy with the state of my mental health, "I like it here with all my friends, "Whisky bourbon, Scotch Irish, "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Who can it be now? "If it's a mare that will take me away? "Will she follow me? "Wish the future I could see, "I see just fantasy, "Oh, Who can it be now? "I'm all worked up now! "Who can it be now? "Why should I care now? "Oh, Who can it be now? "Oh, yeah, Who can it, Who can it "Oh, Who can it be now? "Oh, Why I care now?" Lyrics by ????? ????? Music By Men At Work (Again, but different song) "Traveling in a stinking suit, "With no booze not much to glut, "So I came to a strange lady, she will make me nervous, "She should take me in and make me some breakfast, "Cause I Do come for the land down under! "Where mares chug while others slumber, "You will hear, you will hear the thunder! "You better run, when I seek shelter!" "Went to a public library, "Right here in tiny ponyville, "When I will ask the mare if she can feed me, "She will smile and dishes a disgusting sandwich, "And She'll say, So you come from the land down under? "Where beer flows and mares plunder? "I can hear, I can hear the thunder! "You can stop, you found your cover, "I can smell the liquor cabinet, "I can hear you put the locks on it right away, "You think you could try and tempt me? "Cause I come from the land of plenty! "As I said, I come from the land down under! "Where Mares snore and others shatter, "You hear, you hear the thunder? "I start to run, so I find cover! "Cause I live in a land down under, "Where mares roar while others slumber, "I hear, I hear the thunder, "I'm so lucky, that I got cover, "Cause I come from a land down under, "Where beer flows and mares chunder , "Can you hear, can you hear the thunder, "I stop run, I got cover, "Living in the land down under, "Is so much fun, when you don't slumber, "You can hear, you can hear the thunder, "That the sign to run and find cover! "Living in a land down under." "Berry Punch, Why didn't you said it was you, you dirty old rat?" "I can't put a show now you filthy twat?" "Who is she?" "Rainbow Dash meet Berry Punch, The mare who showed me how to drink when I was 8," "Nice to meet you, WAIT, she helped you do underage drinking?!!" "Well I am a year younger then Twilight Drunkle here, she started late, that's all, I began drinking at the fine age of 4." "WHAT?!!" "Ignore her, Berry Punch, what brings you here?" "Crikey, I just came to meet my old shila, and maybe chug a bit while we put oats on the barbi," "What she said?" "Here take this dictionary it could help you." "What is it? Aussie - English Canterlot Dictionary," "Just read it," "I bet you excited for your first day of work, you remembered to have the cloud walking spell casted on you I trust." "Yes, Pinkie remembered to have the spell casted on her, yes. Pinkie is not a dumb horse." "That is great, we are putting hard floors right now so you won't really need it, but we didn't got to cover all the places you will go to during a working day." "And what places Pinkie should go to in a working day? yes." "Oh nothing special, just your work station, bathrooms, dining room and the hallways, You can trust me, every pony know Surprise is the best supervisor, also like my name, I made you a surprise!!" "What is that surprise?" "I made you a song, it got cool lyrics, and it talks on your working day, also it got really good music so you can remember it and it uses the big shift bell as part of the score too, I think it starts right now!" Lyrics by Surprise Music by AC\DC "We make rolling thunders, a pouring rain. "We bring in the hurricane, "Our lighting flashes across the sky, "Stick to the rules, and you won't die, "We don't take prisoners, We spare all lives, "No pony is putting up a fight, "Listen to the bell, it tells you when to work, "The work is safe, I can tell you, "Work bell, "Yeah, work bell, "I am the one to ring the work bell, "When the work rising, work bell!!" "I got pink sensations, Up and down my spine, "You should know evil is a good friend of mine, "I will make pink lightings that will crack the sky, "If Tia is over there, that's where I Strike, "I don't take prisoners, no soul I spare, "Every pony will put up a fight!, "Listen to my bell, it tell you when to run, "Work not safe, now that I'm around! "Kill bell, "Yeah, kill bell, "I will bring the killing bell. "When I ring it, kill bell!!" "Yeow, "Work bell, work is coming to you!, "Kill bell, don't tell me what to do," "Work bell, That's what I'm here to do." "Work bell, you won this time." "Work bell, I could taken you down." "Work bell, stop dragging me around." "Work bell, do the job right." "Work bell, I won't put up a fight." "Work bell." "I say I still can drink more and hold better my booze!" "Stop being silly, I'm the princess of drinking for pony sake!" "I say your just don't want to share your booze with me cause you know I will drink it all." "Stop being silly I got enough booze to kill a medium town." "well the I challenge you to a music drink off!!" "You know I will win right?" "What's a music drink off?" "I have no idea." "I know what it is." "So what do you say? we drink and play, first one to miss a note loses." "I'm sorry I'm worthless to the story, or to life." "Just to show you how much better I am I will play the lead guitar in your nation drinking song!" "Well I take the drums, playing guitar drunk is too easy, try to keep the beat while drunk!" "This is going to be so epic..." "What is that song anyway?" Lyrics by Berry Punch and Twilight Sparkle Music by AC\DC "TWILIGHT!" "SPARKLE!" "BERRY!" "PUNCH!" "TWILIGHT!" "SPARKLE!" "BERRY!" "PUNCH!" "CHUG!" "CHUG!" "I seem caught, "In the middle of the group of your friends," "PUNCH!" "I look around' "To see there's no turning back," "SPARKLE!" "My mind racing, "Think of all the things I could do," "PUNCH!" "And I know, "There is no help, no help for you," "SPARKLE!" "The beat of the drums, "Burns in my heart, "The Thunder of home "Keeps me alive "You'll be - Berry Punched!" "Went down a bottle, "I'll brake your limit, hit you home, "Went through Celestia, yes Celestia, "Do I made my point? "Drink every day, "A bottle each day just keep me sane, "I had to learn to keep it in, "Yeah, yeah, she ,she, she broke my mind, "You should be shaking at the knees, "Can you fill my drink, please? "I think I'm too kind, "You'll be - Twilight Smashed, Twilight smashed, "Yeah, yeah, yeah Twilight smashed, "Oh, Twilight smashed, Yeah." "I no shaking on my knees, "Could you fill my drink please? "Berry Punched, Berry Punched, "Yeah, yeah, yeah Berry Punched, "Berry Punched, yeah, yeah, yeah, "You see, I'm alright, "I'm doing fine." "I'm, I'm alright, ""Also, doing fine." "So fine." "Berry Punched, yeah ,yeah, yeah," "Twilight smashed.""Berry Punched.""Twilight smashed." "Whoa baby babe Berry Punched," "You'll be, Twilight smashed,""Berry Punched." "Twilight smashed.""Berry Punched." "You been, Twilight Punched." "It seem we matched, just drink and last mare to puke?" "Sure." "The Work is so not for Pinkie, yes. Pinkie Can hear them sing," Lyrics Pinkie Pie Music AC\DC "Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, "This just is so annoying, "I just sit and count the snow, "I want to take all I can get, "You know what I mean, "There is deadly to the left of me, "Deadly to the right, "It is no gun, "It is no knife "But it will make due, "Cuz I'm Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode! "I'm dirty, mean, and mighty unclean, "I'm a wanted mare, "Public enemy number one, "Understand? "So lock me up, "In a padded room, "Throw the keys, "And run for your life, "The Pink is back in town, "Don't you mess around, "Cuz I'm Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode! "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "I'm ostracized, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "I will always fight, work, work, work "Pi-n-kie, "I'm a power whore, work, work, work, "Pi-n-kie, "You made me explode!" "Hay Pinkie, keep it down, other ponies are trying to work here," "Sorry Supervisor Surprise, Pinkie will be quiet, yes." "I think we drunk too much, I no feel good." "I agree, it see there is too much drinking." "Why she called Punch anyway?" "Should I show her?" 'Be my guest." "What you ... Ouch!!!!, why you punched me for?" "She is the best Puncher in all of down under, as a foal she pouched her dad cold," "Yah, he is still very proud of it, I feel like I'm on the roadway to pony heck." Lyrics by Berry Punch and Twilight Sparkle Music by AC\DC "Easy drinking, drinking free, "One way ticket to lose my mind, "Ask nothing, enjoy the ride, "Drinking everything with pride, "Don't need reason, just liver time, "It's the thing I love to do, "Drinking hard, Going down, "I'll see my dead friends soon," "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "We walk down the way to heck," "No stop sign, not my booze, "No pony stop me drunk, "Like a wheel, head is spinning, "I think I messed it around, "Hay Mommy, me gonna puke, "I don't feel so good, "Hay dada, look at me, "I drunk more then you" "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "We on the roadway to heck, "Roadway to heck, "Owwww" "I'm on the highway to heck, "Low way to hell," "We on the roadway to heck, "On speedway to beck," "Highway to beck, "We on something to crap," "Roadway to heck, "Walk way to check," "Momma, Walk way for check, "And we going down....""All the way." "That was great babe, but can I do a song now I'm free again?" "Run Berry, Run..." Lyrics by Scootaloo Music by AC/DC "She is a fast machine,I keeps my motor clean, "She's the best darn mare I have ever seen, "She got bloodshot eyes, telling me no lies, "Knocking me out with those Equestrian thighs, "She drank more then her share, she is fighting for air, "When you told me to come I was already here, "I made the walls start rocking, the earth was bucking, "My mind is aching, cause you just do it, "And you, took me all night long, "Yeah you, took me all night long, "Working double time, on the production line, "You one of a kind, make me work, all time, "Want no beards, just another shot, "Make a meal outta me and come back for more, "You so cool to drink another round, "You chug it down and back in the ring, "The walls start rocking, The earth is bucking, "My mind is racing, can we make it, "And you, took me all night long, "Yeah you, took me all night long, "Knock me out, I say, "You took me all night long, "You want me shacking and you take me all night long, "Yah you took me, "When you shook me, "You really shook me as you took me all night long, "Ohhhhhhh you took me all night long, "Yeah, yeah, you took me all night long, "It really got me when it took me all night long, "Yes you shook me, "When you took me all night long.." "I'll give it a pass." THE END(I wish)
Shy one's gig"That was a long break, what in the hay happened?" "If Pinkie knew better yes. she would say the writer had an internal struggle cause Rae started doing videos of us again, then a pink nightmare came to him and demanded a new chapter, in exchange she let him keep his sanity, yes." "Or he missed one date then got out of his roll and went dry." "Like that will happen." *Gulp* "He would had some brain juice till almost deadly level and would get ideas back for new chapters." "Maybe he don't want to get drunk in order to write a story and the last huge chapter dried him out, as well as that he got lots of final tests to study for now and could be using his time in more productive ways." "What is that nonsense that yellow one is talking? stop her right now, her words needs to be revenged. yes." "I know Pinkie is crazy, and agreeing with her should make me question my own sanity but I have to agree with her this time. lets use the evil stick thing on Thunderthigh." "If you will have your way with her please try to lower damage to her hide, Pegasie skin is all the rage now." "I'm sorry for talking and I deserve everything you will do to me." "Stop that talk!" "Yah, Nopony will hurt Fluttershy on my watch!" "I'm sorry you have to defend me." "You shouldn't be sorry, Fluttershy." "Your a great pony Flutters." "I'm sorry." "There is no reason to be sorry sugar cube." "Sorry." "Stop being sorry, I won't let my mare friend be sorry for things she don't need to be." "Say what now?" "That is new." "Please say she didn't just..." "Made this a ship fic? hehehehe, Pinkie thinks Rainbow Dash just did. yes. Pinkie Thinks silly Rainbow Dash just made this a ship fic." "There is a ship here? how? we are not even near the sea. is it a land ship?" "I'm sorry Dash loves me in that way." "That way? there are ways to love?" "Pinkie is confused, Yes.... That is uncommon." "Well this seems like a good time to tell you all to leave my home." "But we are not in your home." "I'm a princess now, every where is my home, now leave!" "Grumpy." "So Fluttershy, what we need is to raise your self worth. best way is to work on your weak parts, now, what you don't like in yourself?" "Can I say everything?" "No hun, cause then we will never get somewhere." "Oh, I'm sorry." "You shouldn't be sorry, you know what I do when I feel blue?" "Your always blue, that's your color." "I don't mean like that..." "I'm sorry." "Anyway I love to get fancy stuff for myself, make me feel all nice and help me forget I'm a loser." "I can't afford fancy stuff. I'm sorry." "And why you think that?" "Well, all my income is from welfare and almost all I got go to my animal friends, and the little I got left covers my food, I can allow myself a house only cause it's from public security and no one else wants it cause its right next to the everfree so I get it for free with even a small income that helps cover the bills, I don't get any bits from giving pets for adoption cause I give them free so ponies won't think of them as toys or tools, I haven't used toothpaste in months now and I just rub dirt on my teeth cause I can't even afford toothpaste." "Now I know that can't be true cause Colgate, the town dentist, gives away toothpaste like its air or something, that girl really should have her brand by now." "I'm too shy to get toothpaste from Colgate. sorry." "Well then we should get you a job, and I know how!" "Sorry for asking but how?" "With a montage with old time rock music in the background and really bad lyrics that will just say what we are doing." "You can do that?" "Yes." "Ok then." Lyrics by Rainbow Dash Music by Bachman Turner Overdrive "You get up every morning, feeling pretty lonely, "Then you make your way to ponyville. "There's Twilight drinking there, Rarity say this, and Pinkie doing that, "And girl, I sure look pretty. "But if you get a job, you won't care for all that, "You will work your brain out for bread, "If you get annoyed, let at me, it gets worse, "Only AJ work at nothing all day." "Hay I'm Taking care of business, every day, "Bucking apple trees every day, "It's really hard work, try it out, "Bucking apple trees and no pay for overtime, workout." "I just see you sleeping, think your a musician, "They work when they are mellow, "If you think you'll go far? with your second hoof bass. "Then your hanging with the wrong bunch of fellows," "That sounds like fun, just lying in the sun, "Could I get a job at doing that? "Can I avoid all the work and call myself a self employed? "Work at writing songs all day?" "But its pretty hard work, you should know." "Put together chords, all the day." "I can do that, should be fun." "You still won't get pay for over time, baby." "I take good care for my business, "I never go away, not a day!" "I'll get up everyday, with purpose for my day, "I won't even want to sleep in. "No need to meet ponies, always pushing, always shoving, "Oh boy! I won't need to look pretty." "You will see me having fun, just lying in the sun, "Doing a job I really love, "I'll get a second rate guitar, I know I will go far, "I love you, you great bunch of fellows," "And I will be playing every day, all the day, "Play the day away, every day, "I will get to do some art, I like that, "I don't need no pay for overtime, got it right." "Play the day away, "Playing everyday, "Play the day away, "Playing everyday." "Play the day away, every way, "Play all the day, every day, "Playing everyday, It all mine, "Play the day away, working overtime." "Play the day away. "Playing all the day, "I'll be taking care of business, "I'll earn my living in my own way!" "Play the day away, "Play all the day, "Playing everyday." "Well that was easy," "I want to do music." "I thought getting a job for Fluttershy would be harder, or at least longer." "I can do great music." "We got that hun." "I'm going to do music." "Relax Fluttershy, you made your point, do you even know how to play?" "That don't matter, I can sing." "I think she is getting a big full of herself." "I will be a great singer." "If only we know a professional singer to take her down a peg." "I will be the best singer in the world." "I come to prove that Pinkie is the best, yes. meet Pinkie Pie's sister, Maud Pie. yes.meet Pinkie's sister Maud." "Hi Maud. what you doing?" "You fool!!, Can't you see Maud is the famous singer from the famous band ,'the mating revolvers'? yes." "What up you b**** f***** m*****f**** **** ******** ********? can't b****** you f****** see that I'm m*****f**** the big c**** around this f***** r***** place n*****?" "What was all that bleeping?" "Oh yes, Maud is forced by law to wear an automatic speech censor, every time she says something that is 'soul damaging' this thing bleeps her, she broke 3 today already, and it's only the afternoon, hehehehehe." "I'm going to be the best singer in the world." "Oh ******* hell you ****** ****** ******** won't! who you the f****ing stupid dumbass nincompoop half wit dip shit dimwit retard think you are?" "That's number 4!" TO BE CONTINUED...
