To whoever is reading this
To whoever is reading this,
I don't think I'm going to last much longer so I'm telling you everything. Ever since I met my best friends, I had always been motivated to be a better pony. But I don't know if I have been a better pony. I was selfish and ignorant. All I cared about was being cool and getting my cutie mark so that I wasn't being made fun of by other ponies.
But Sweetie Bell and Apple Bloom stood by me. They watched my flank and I watched theirs. They had always been good friends to me, but I worry that I was never a good friend to them. If I could, I would go back and change it all. I have been a better foal to my mummy, and I would have never forced her t leave daddy.
I feel like I should apologise to Rainbow Dash for being such pain in the backside. I pestered her, trying to be a cool pony to try and win her respect. Now I think about it, she already respected me for respecting her. But I just forced it and forced it. I don't blame her for ignoring me sometimes, and being mean to me when I pushed it too far. So please tell her I'm sorry for being so annoying and time consuming. I'm sorry Rainbow', I really am.
I can feel myself getting weaker, so I want to tell you what happened before I go. I accepted a dare from Diamond Tiara to go to the big tree on the outside of the Everfree. I wanted to look cool so I did it. But as I turned back, things had changed on their own and blocked me from leaving. I tried to go around but I got lost. I looked and looked for a way out but I couldn't.
I cried and yelled. I hoped somepony would hear me. I thought maybe Zecora would hear me and save me but she didn't. So I cried even more until I heard something moving. It was louder and clumsier than a pony and I didn't trust it. I ran and ran, I kept running for ages but it caught me. It was a Timberwolf and it was scary. It hit me lots of times before it ran away. I think it went to tell its friends I was here because it had cut me bad and I couldn't move, it hurt too much.
It is true what they say. Your life does flash by your eyes as you start to go. I got sad and I thought I would write down my regrets on paper so somepony could give my apologies for me.
It is quiet now but sometimes I hear movement in the trees. I think they are coming back to get me. It's dark and I'm scared. I can see their eyes now they're back for me. They're coming goodbye everypony I love you Rumble I'm sor--
Ponyville town square, Community meeting...
"... And the note ends there."
Everypony was in complete silence as Mayor Mare finished the message. The sound of crying was heard as fillies and colts couldn't take the sadness of a fellow foals death. A particular grey coated colt collapsed onto the ground as his brother, Thunderlane, comforted him and attempted to soften the deep and piercing wounds that last sentence had inflicted on his brain.
"I love you too..." He managed to mumble under his sobbing and trembling breath.
"... I love you too."
Nopony was ever the same again after that. Nopony talked about it. In fact they barely spoke at all. Especially not around Rumble. He spent most of the days afterwards alone, outside. Not even bothering to look up from the dusty dirt ground that covered Ponyville's floors.
He thought back to those special evenings that he and Scootaloo had spent together. Lying down on this very hill, watching the sun set over the horizon. He loved the way her orange coat blended in perfectly with the warm glow the setting sun cast over Equestria. He loved her purple mane that contrasted her fur and contemplated her beautiful face. The face... Oh how he would never forget her face. Those eyes... Those deep purple orbs that seemed to go on forever, far past her head. They were gateways to another world and he had loved to stare into them.
Scootaloo made him complete. And without her, Rumble didn't know what to do. His life had been torn in half by her passing, he would never be whole again. Nothing would ever make him as happy as she did. He would never feel those hooves on his again, and never would he kiss her soft lips again. She was gone. Forever.
That was something Rumble could never come to terms with. The love of his life, gone. So this was the next best thing. Lying here was a reminder of what once was. What once bloomed like a blossom tree but now lingered in the dark. The uncertain dark that lay within his mind would never go away. Whenever he thought about her, it loomed over him. Forcing him down into the depths of his sorrow where he fought to come back up without succumbing to the temptations in the back of his brain.
He often thought about doing it. All he wanted was to be with her again. To see her again, hear her sweet voice again. And he knew that if he did it, he might be allowed to return to her. But something kept stopping him. A shard of broken glass that wouldn't leave him. It was sharp and defined. It cut through all temptations in him to do it.
It's message was loud, stubborn and clear. It shouted it as strongly as it could and the darkness receded. It was proud and strong, a permanent piece of his broken psyche that was lodged securely inside him. It gave him the slightest little bits of hope. Lifting his spirits just high enough to look down upon the urges whenever they rose to the challenge.
It asked him;
What would she want you to do?
He answered with the same defiant tone every time.
He would live on.
He was going to live a good life, be a good foal to his parents and maybe have his own foals one day. He had thought this so many times it was beginning to seep up into him. It grew behind his eyelids, like the sunset glow that he once looked forward to. It began to fill him, making him certain that he would go on to be strong.
It's what she would have wanted.
He opened his eyes and stood up. He gazed into the sky for the first time in an eternity. He saw a space that he and his filly had dreamed of crossing together one day. And he smiled.
