Marvelous Equestria Adventuresby Lost ControlChaptersMysterious CupcakesThe PitTrailing the RainbowA Very Special SomeponyDinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 1Dinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 2Mysterious CupcakesThe Wooden Monstrosity was getting nearer. Past Light could feel it. He had been flying at top speed for 15 minutes now and his wings were beginning to cramp up. But he had to keep going. Just a little farther…..Suddenly the worst happened; Past’s wings involuntarily folded into his body. The now flightless pegasus fell to the ground as the monster pounced… “Move it, kid!” The fruit pony glared at the tan-coated pegasus blocking his path for the umpteenth time. Impatiently, the seller dug his hooves into the ground. If the kid didn’t move soon, he’d be late again to the market. Thankfully, the colt got up and trotted off, presumably to one of the “popular places”. The seller anxiously checked the time, and sighed with relief. He still had time to get to his stall. Past slumped disappointedly towards Sugar Cube Corner. Once again, he’d failed to make it all the way from his house to the “store of sweetness”, and his time had even gone up. His cousin Rainbow Dash had made it the same distance in 15 seconds, and her wings hadn’t stopped working. And to top it all off, he was probably late for the pre-training snack. Dejected, he walked slowly towards the counter. He looked up to place his order, and instantly cheered up. His best friend, Lost Control, was ponying the register. Lost Control was a sky-blue coated unicorn with a curly red mane. He was as good at magic as Princess Twilight had been at that age, but magic didn’t seem to be his niche. Instead, his flank was adorned with an erratic spiral as his cutie mark, symbolizing his talent of complete and utter randomness. “Hey there, Past!” Lost said. He was bouncing around the register in no particular pattern. Lost had gotten many of the traits his sister Pinkie Pie carried, including a mild case of ADHD. Past smiled as he tried to decide what to order. As always, there was a veritable encyclopedia of sugar filled treats. Lost noticed his friend’s indecisive glancing and offered a suggestion. “Try these, Buddy!” Lost waved a tray of cupcakes in Past’s face. “They just came in today!” “Okay,” Past took a cupcake off the tray (with much difficulty, I might add) and inspected it. The cupcake itself was cyanish, with a colorful swirl of various frostings adorning the top. It reminded Past of someone, but he wasn’t sure who. Tentatively, Past took a bite of the pastry, and his face lit up with pleasure. In a few seconds, Past had downed the entire dessert. “Wow, these are really good!” Past exclaimed. “I knew you’d like it. Wanna know what we’re calling it?” Lost asked. “Sure,” Past answered. “The Rainbow Dash!” “The what?” “The Rainbow Dash!” Past suddenly realized that Rainbow Dash wasn’t there yet. It was unlike her to be so late, especially when she was meeting Past. Nervously, he asked, “A-Are you saying anything else besides the name?” “Yup, the tagline. ‘Comes from the real Rainbow Dash!’ Pretty good, right? Past? Past, why are you on the floor?” Past’s suspicions had culminated at the word “Rainbow”. He now realized that his cousin had most likely been transformed into a batch of cupcakes. Here is a complete record of his thoughts from the spark of epiphany to his meeting with the floor of Sugar Cube Corner. They turned my cousin into cupcakes! Lost is a psychopath. I wonder if Miss Pinkie helped. Oh my Celestia, this is just like that fanfic I read on the Hoofernet. Why is the ground rushing toward me? Past then blacked out due to his head hitting the floor. The pegasus woke up in a hospital bed. He heard the steady beep of the heart rate monitor as his heart beat in a relaxed rhythm. Past turned his head slightly and found himself staring into the green eyes of Lost Control. “Nice to see you’re awake, Past!” the now suspicious unicorn peppily pronounced. “You want a cupcake?” Lost levitated a cupcake with yellow frosting and slightly orange cake. “We’re calling this one the Applejack!” “Enough!” Past yelled, knocking the “Applejack” out of Lost’s field of magic. “What’s with all the weird cupcakes?! First you give me a cupcake that looks like Rainbow Dash, and now this? Explain to me, Lost, what is going on?” Suddenly, a cyan pegasus burst into the room. It was none other than Rainbow Dash! “Past, what’s wrong? You ate the cupcake I made and then flipped out. Are you okay?” Past looked sheepishly at the two ponies as the cupcake he’d hit detached from the ceiling where it had stuck and fell onto the head of a nurse who had just walked in. “I, uh, kinda thought you were the cupcake.” “Why in Equestria would you think that, Past?” Rainbow asked. “I don’t know. I read a fanfic where Pinkie killed you violently and made you into cupcakes, so I let my imagination run away with me, I guess,” Past admitted. “Well, don’t read those stories again, okay?” Rainbow said. “Okay,” Past replied. Satisfied, Rainbow exited the room. Past turned toward Lost, who was walking towards the window. “How long was I out?” he questioned. “About two weeks,” Lost said casually, now directly in front of the window. “Two weeks?” Past yelled, stunned. “Ee-yup.” Lost said just before he crashed out the 30th story window. The PitPast leaped up from his bed and rushed to the window. Lost was nowhere to be found, but a large, craggy pit had formed where he should have hit the ground. Past flew out the window to inspect the brand-new cave and hopefully find Lost. Lost himself was currently at the bottom of said pit, unharmed, although not miraculously. As soon as Lost had realized he was falling, he had constructed a magic shield around himself that had dissipated once he’d reached the end of his descent. Unfortunately, Past smashed into Lost almost immediately after his head finished clearing. The two colts sat up, and Past quickly apologized to Lost for smashing his head. However, Lost was not paying attention, but staring at some entity outside the light field created by the hole. Past questioned, “Lost, what exactly are you looking at?” Lost still continued to gaze blankly, mouth hanging open. Past waved a hoof in front of Lost’s blank face, but the pony still continued to gaze blankly over Past’s wing. Past slowly turned around, fearful of what could be lurking in the shadows behind him. Past then gasped at the sight of the thing. It was huge, whitish, and gave off an oddly sweet smell. Past reached out a hoof to touch the monstrosity. The beast's skin felt like...paper. "Lost, bring up the light," Past commanded. Lost obligingly activated his horn, slowly revealing the mound that stood before them. It was... "A cupcake?" Past tilted his head quizzically, observing the gargantuan confection. The dessert looked to be made of chocolate marble cake, with a vanilla frosting heavily applied to its crown. “THIS IS AMAZING!!!” Lost yelled as he dove into the heart of the cupcake. Past amusedly watched the unicorn as he dismantled the dessert from the inside. What? Who is this? Are you… Lost? So what should I do? Why do you keep saying “conspiratorial whisper”? After Lost had finished devouring the cupcake, he trotted over to Past while licking free his cheeks of leftover cake remnants. “There doesn’t appear to be anything else in this cavern,” Lost said. “We should probably leave.” “But how?” Past asked. “The only way out of this pit-“ “Oubliette,” Lost said. “What?” “A prison with a hole in the top as its only exit is called an oubliette. It was on Twilight’s Word-Of-The-Day calendar last week.” “Lost, that’s not even remotely important right now.” Lost suddenly glared at Past with such force that Past felt that he had no choice but to go along with Lost. “Fine. The only way out of this ouibliette was blocked by the cave-in I caused.” “Oh, that’s not a problem. I just learned a teleportation spell from my lessons with Twilight today.” Lost was extremely advanced in magic, but had not been accepted into Princess Celestia’s School For Gifted Unicorns, due to the fact that he had accidentally destroyed the Audition Tower with a magnitude Seven earthquake. As a result, Princess Twilight had agreed to teach the colt more advanced magic that Cheerilee, being an Earth pony, could not give lessons on. Lost’s horn began to glow, and ten seconds later, he’d disappeared. Past, however, was still in the cave when Lost popped back in. “Why did you leave me behind?!” Past half whined, half shouted. “Sorry. I had to make sure the spell would work; I’d never attempted to teleport so great a distance before,” Lost explained, with an expert use of a semicolon that only a truly great writer could impleme- Sorry. Ahem. Past nodded in consent, thankful that Lost had actually had a reason for leaving him behind. Lost extended a hoof towards Past, who then formed an epic brohoof by bumping Lost’s hoof with his own. Soon, the two colts were standing on the grass just beside the now blocked entrance to the pit- Oh. Right. They were standing beside the now blocked entrance to the oubliette while a very surprised Rainbow Dash looked on. Past turned his head and said “Dashie? Why are you here?” “Well,” Rainbow Dash began to explain, “I was flying away from the hospital when I saw a hugely epic explosion. Being the totally awesome hero that I am, I turned around and flew back to see if I could lend a hoof. But seeing as how everything’s fine now, I guess I’ll go help Pinkie Mmpfh!” Rainbow quickly covered her mouth with her hoof and ran away. “Past, did you just see that?” Lost asked. “Yeah, are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Past replied. “SUPER EPIC STAKEOUT TIME!” the two shouted, and immediately ran after Rainbow. Trailing the RainbowRainbow Dash had very nearly bucked up. Pinkie Pie had told her not to tell anyone about their secret meeting, and she’d very nearly let it slip to the two colts. If they had found out… She’d Pinkie promised to tell no one of the meeting, and if she had broken that promise, she’d have lost Pinkie as a friend- “FOREEEEEVVVEEEERRRR!” Pinkie shouted from across the market as she trotted up to Rainbow. “Pinkie, I don’t even want to know how you read my mind,” Rainbow said. “Silly, I didn’t read your mind!” Pinkie replied. “Oh, ok.” “I read the rough draft.” “Okay, Pinkie,” Rainbow conceded, seeing that it was fruitless to question the pink pony, “let’s just go to…” “My house,” Pinkie offered. “Yeah, your house, and…bake the pie.” Lost and Past watched all of this discussion from inside a bush. Past whispered sharply, “They’re on the move! Let’s go!” “Just a second, Watson,” Lost said in a Braytish accent. “I’m looking for clues.” “WE NEED TO GO!” Past yelled, eliciting attention from all the ponies in the market. “Stop playing ‘Sherlock Hooves’ and help me.” “Fine,” Lost said, discarding his hat and cape, “forgive me for trying to add a little fun to the stakeout.” The two ponies promptly ran after the two Elements. After following the trail for a few minutes, the pegasus and unicorn came to an enormous waterfall. They scouted around for clues as to where the two Elements had gone, but came up empty-hooved. “I don’t understand!” Past exasperatedly yelled. “They didn’t go left, they didn’t go right, and they didn’t go up! Did they just disappear into thin air?” “Nope. They went in there,” Lost said, pointing to the waterfall. “Lost, I think you’re going insane,” Past said. “There’s nothing there but water and rock.” “Nonsense! Here, I’ll show you,” Lost said. The blue unicorn then charged into the raging rapids. Past waited. Any second now, Lost would hit the rock wall and yell “OW!” But the “OW” never came. Curious, Past walked up to, and eventually through, the waterfall. On the other side was, as Lost had said, a cavernous tunnel leading into the mountain, with Lost standing smugly in the entrance. “Toldja so, Past,” Lost trumpeted, “TOL-DJA.” “Fine, you told me. Let’s go find Rainbow and Pinkie,” Past said as they began to walk down the tunnel. Soon, however, they came to a steel door. A voice emanated from the other side of the door and said, “This door be locked with magic spells, And every living thing foretells, That if you wrongly reply to this, The riddle, you’ll die because you missed!” A different voice now asked them the riddle, a voice that was unmistakably Pinkie’s. “Here’s your riddle! What word rhymes with orange? Can you answer that?” Past and Lost whispered many solutions to each other, but none of them seemed right. Finally Lost said, “I think I know how to get past this door.” Lost trotted up to the door as it repeated its question. “What word rhymes with orange? Can you answer that?” “Nope!” Lost said. “I can’t answer it!” Buck, Past thought. We’re dead for sure. Suddenly, the door swung open, to reveal… another door. This door, however, was wooden, and the two could hear noises on the other side. Curious, the two put their ears to the door. A slurping sound could be heard, and for a second, that was all. Then somepony that was obviously Dash moaned, “Pinkie, please stop…” “I can’t help it, Dashie! It’s too sweet!” Horrified, the two flung open the door, to reveal Pinkie gleefully licking- -The walls of the cave, while Rainbow Dash facehoofed nearby. Well, what did you think was happening? Pervert. The cave’s walls were coated with a crystalline substance, which appeared to be what Pinkie was licking. Puzzled, Lost put his tongue to the wall and took a tentative lick. “It’s sugar!” “Really?” Past said, and began to lick the wall as well. “You’re right! Girls, what’s going on?” “Well, um, you see, Pinkie had run out of sugar at Sugar Cube Corner, and asked me if I wanted to help get some more. We came to the cave, and she just started licking the walls,” Rainbow explained. “That’s right!” Pinkie said, having finally stopped licking the walls. “And here’s something to thank you for your help.” She displayed a piece of sugar the size of a cake. “Wow, thanks, Pinkie!” Rainbow said. She and Pinkie left the cave, talking about sugar. “So, Past, you wanna go do something?” Lost asked. “Sorry, buddy, I can’t. Me and the other Crusaders are doing something. You wanna come with?” Past asked in return. “Sure,” Lost replied, and the two walked back to Ponyville. When they passed by the lake, however, their plans changed. The lake was filled with sea serpents, all diving and attacking each other, and something else. When Past and Lost ran around to get a better look, they were distraught to discover that the something… was Applebloom. A Very Special SomeponyWarning- Shipping ahead! Lost and Past instantly dove into action. “You get Applebloom out while I subdue the monsters!” Lost yelled, firing up his horn. Past, hearing this, flew up to the clouds, looking for an opening. Lost, meanwhile, was tying the beasts down with tendrils of red magic, slowly increasing the chances of Applebloom’s rescue. Past saw an opening, and quickly swooped to the water, plucked the filly out, and deposited her on safe ground as Lost finished up his part of the job. “Excellent magic work, if I do say so myself,” Lost said, “and I do.” He ran over to Past and Applebloom. Past was methodically checking her body for any injury. Lost, seeing this, went over and offered a suggestion. “Uh, Past.” “What is it, Lost?” Past asked. “Now this is just a small suggestion, but you might want to get her breathing.” Past, hearing this, rapidly checked her chest for signs of life. As Lost had said, there were none. “Oh, shit, what should I do?” he asked himself. Lost gave an evil grin. “Weeelllllll… you could try giving her mouth-to-mouth,” he said, trying to hold back a burst of laughter. “WHAT?!” “Mouth to Mouth.” Lost’s attempts to hold back his laughter failed. He fell to the ground, hooves on his belly as he exploded, positively tickled. “You (chheee) know, (ppffhhhee) when you take your mouth (blahaha) and put it (gahaiii) on hers! Bahahahahaha!” Lost was now unable to speak, so much was he laughing. “Shut up, man!” Past yelled. He then turned his attention to Applebloom (trying to ignore the background noise) and began trying everything he could think of to get the water out of her lungs. Finally, when all else had failed, Past ground his teeth… and began giving the filly CPR. This, it seemed, was actually working. After a while, she began breathing enough where he could finally stop. He watched her for several tense seconds, but she eventually coughed out the remaining water and sat up. “What’s the last thing you remember?” Past questioned. Applebloom replied, “Well, ah was walkin’ ta the clubhouse for tha meetin’ and ah got pulled inta the lake by them sea critters.” “All right then.” Past stood and asked, “Should we go to the clubhouse? Sweetie and Scootaloo are probably worried, and- “Just a sec,” Applebloom said. “Why is Lost on the ground over there?” Lost had finally stopped laughing and was now looking at the two of them intently, waiting for the next line. “He was laughing because… I gave you CPR,” Past admitted. “You WHAT?” “BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!” Lost burst into laughter again at Applebloom’s reaction. Both her and Past had become as red as Applebloom’s mane. The two simultaneously turned to Lost and said, “SHUT UP!” “I’m sorry! It was just so hilarious!” the unicorn explained. Lost got to his feet and said, “Let’s just get to your clubhouse.” “Hold on a minute,” Applebloom said. “There’s somethin’ ah need ta do first.” She then walked up to Past, leaned over, and kissed him. “Ah love you, Past Light,” she- Shipping. Because-Wait, I don’t need to justify my actions to you! I am your God! Continue with the story! Now, where was I? Oh right. “Ah love you, Past Light,” she said. “Ohh Snaaap!” Lost said. “I love you too!” the surprised pegasus said. “Double Oh Snap!” Lost said. “I’ve had a crush on you since Hearts and Hooves Day two years ago!” they said together. “Triple Oh Snap with a WTF cherry!” Lost said. “Let’s go on a date,” Past said. “I’ll take you to Sugar Cube Corner at five.” “Okay, see you then!” Applebloom said, and ran to the clubhouse. Past stood there for a bit, his mouth hanging open. “What just happened?” he asked himself. “I’ll tell ya what happened! My best buddy just got a smokin’ hot date!” Lost said. “Is this a dream?” “Have I become a carrot?” “No…” “Then you’re awake!” Lost dragged Past to the clubhouse. “Let’s get you nice and ready for your date!” Dinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 1Past and Lost walked through the streets of Ponyville, talking in loud, excited tones. Lost, in order to give Past some coaching on his date, had elected to take the “scenic route” through the town. “Now, fillies are… like… um,” Past stuttered, reviewing the material that Lost had gone over. “Bees. They’ll sting you if you agitate them, but if you keep them happy, they’ll ooze honey,” Lost explained metaphorically. “Ooze? That just sounds gross!” Past said. “Okay, bad example. But the principle is there. Now, how do you keep her happy?” “Listen to her, be nice, and above all… be yourself,” Past recited. “EXCELLENT! You pass with flying colors,” Lost cheered. “And just in time, too. We have arrived at Sugar Cube Corner!” “Okay,” Past said, taking a deep breath. He was beginning to walk up to the door when Lost put a hoof on his shoulder, halting him. “Listen, I have something I need you to do for me,” Lost said. Using his magic, he took a red envelope out of his saddlebags and placed it on Past’s hoof. On the envelope, in bluish ink, were written the words “Sweetie Belle”. Past, seeing this, began to grin evilly. “Heh, ‘Sweetie Belle’. Soooo, you have a crush on Sweetie!” Past said gleefully. “Can you just tell AB to give Sweetie that?” Lost asked in a frustrated tone, “Not yet. Remember how you gave me hell during that whole business earlier? Well, now it’s my turn!” Past whooped. He then proceeded to chant repeatedly, “Lost likes Sweetie! Lost likes Sweetie!” over and over. “Shut up, man!” Lost yelled. “Okay, fine,” Past said, stopping his cheers. “I guess I’ll see you in a bit, then.” “Okay, see ya in a bit,” Lost replied. Having finished the conversation, Past went into the store. Lost watched him go, then teleported away… and reappeared on a narrow ledge overlooking Ponyville. He was now wearing a white, hooded robe, with the hood pulled over his head. A gauntlet that appeared to have a springloaded knife on it was strapped to his right foreleg. Lost raised his leg, and the blade popped out of its sheath. He brandished it a few times, and then set his leg back down, resetting the blade with this action. Lost stood like this for a while. His eyes tracked an eagle that flew overhead. Suddenly, Lost raised his head and smiled. He gave a slight nod in the direction of the eagle, and leaped off the ledge. The unicorn landed in a bale of hay, and when he exited, his outfit had changed again. The robe and gauntlet had gone, and in their place was a SSC waiter’s uniform. His hair had been dyed brown, and been combed to replace its usual haphazard style. He also wore a fake mustache. The newly disguised Lost now pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill. “Alright, let’s see here,” Lost said, and began going down a sort of list, crossing out each item as he read it. “Give letter to Past: check; reference ‘Assassin’s Creed’: check; put on disguise: check; stealth Past’s date: not check.” He stopped, then looked slightly to the left, at the ream of words that nopony else could see: the words that had driven him slightly insane. Giving an odd smile, he said, “Well, I guess I need to check that off; eh, reader?” Having said this, Lost turned and entered through the “Employees Only” door, prepared to eavesdrop on the couple. And, more importantly, take their order. Past scanned the restaurant until he found AB at a table near the center. As he strolled over to her, he couldn't help but admire the decor. Not many ponies knew that at 4:30 CPT (Central Pony Time), the restaurant was taken over by Fancy Pancy, an Earth Pony whose talent was, well, being fancy. As a result, the normally spastically decorated restaurant became a wonderful place to take a special somepony out on a fancy date. “Hey, AB!” Past said as he sat down on a rather elegantly embroidered cushion. “Hey there, Past,” Applebloom replied. She seems a little distracted, Past thought. “What’s wrong?” he asked tentatively. “Oh, nothin’. Ah was just thinkin’ ‘bout Sweetie. I think she might be sick…” Applebloom began to say, but she was cut off by the sudden appearance of their rather loud waiter. “Hallo!” the waiter said/shouted. He had a rather thick accent, but what, Past couldn’t place. The waiter was wearing the standard uniform, and his hair was neatly clipped. He also had a fine mustache, and looked to be kinda short.”Vat’d you two like to drink?” Past glanced at the choices, and then said, “I’ll have a root beer, please.” “And vat vould de ladee like?” the server asked, looking at the table, and at the two ponies’ hooves, almost as if he were looking for something. “Ah’ll have an apple cider,” Applebloom said. “Ah, very good. Your drinks shall be out in a moment,” the server said. As the server left, Past suddenly twitched, and made like he was going to get up from his seat, but then sat back down, having changed his mind. “Past, what was that?” Applebloom asked curiously. “What was what?” Past replied. “That seat thing y’all just did. What was that about?” Applebloom explained. “Oh. Right.” Past began to fidget in his seat. “I've been noticing some odd things about our waiter, things that I can’t explain.” “Like what?” “Like the way he kept glancing at the table, and our hooves. Like the way his accent seems forced. And there’s this one thing that’s staying in my mind. When he turned away from us, I saw something. Now, it was just for an instant, but I could’ve sworn he had… a spiral cutie mark.” Dinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 2“So, AB, what were you saying about Sweetie?” Past asked. “Well, she’s been actin’ weird since y’all ‘n Lost arrived at the clubhouse earlier today,” Applebloom explained. “Come to think about it, she’s always actin’ strange when something’s gotta do with Lost. Like when we first formed the club, fer instance. She was all upset when Lost had ta leave the club on account of his Cutie Mark turnin’ up.” “I think I know what the reason may be,” Past said, thinking of the envelope in his saddlebags. “And what, pray tell, would that be?” Applebloom asked. “I’ll tell you afterwards,” Past replied as the waiter came up with their drinks. “Here you arr, sier,” the waiter said, placing their drinks on the table with two arms of magic. “Vun root beer for you and vun apple cider for ze geerl.” “Thank you,” the two ponies said. “Is there aneezing else you vould like?” the waiter asked. “Remember, ve close in tventy minootes.” “No, thank you,” Past said, as he was not feeling hungry. Applebloom said the same. “Hokay,” the waiter said, leaving the two alone. The two ponies then began to make small talk. As they conversed, they realized they enjoyed many of the same things, such as competing athletically, baking, and exploration. Applebloom took sewing lessons with Rarity, while Past took flying lessons with Rainbow Dash. The two came to know each other well in the next few hours. However, Past became aware that the waiter who had served them was watching them both intently. Past was unnerved by the waiter, but decided to do something later. Past took out the envelope and slid it over to Applebloom. “Past, what’s this?” she asked. “It’s a letter for Sweetie Belle, apparently. Lost gave it to me, so I could give it to you, so you could give it to her,” Past explained. “And that brings me to my next point. I know Lost has a crush on Sweetie, and based on what you told me earlier, the feeling is mutual. “I have a theory that the two of them like each other, but neither one knows it. It’s like one of those cliché romantic comedies. But now, Lost has made a move, but he’s afraid of rejection, so he told her in the form of an anonymous letter.” “That explains everything!” Applebloom exclaimed. Just then, the one-minute warning came on over the restaurant intercom. “Ah guess ah need ta go now. I’ll get this ta Sweetie, don’t worry.” The filly got up and headed for the door of the restaurant. “Wait, hold up!” Past said, chasing after Applebloom. “I need your help with something.” “What would that be?” Applebloom asked, puzzled. “The waiter. He was watching us all through the chat we had. I think he may be a criminal in disguise. I want to investigate him,” Past explained. “Well, it seems kinda strange ta me. But, ah guess ah’ll help you,” Applebloom consented. “Excellent!” Past said. Just then, the waiter slipped out the back door of the shop. Past, noticing this, shouted “He’s on the move!” The two ponies then dashed after the waiter. It was now eight o’ clock, and dusk was settling over Ponyville. As Past and Applebloom raced through the streets, they were thankful that most ponies were already retiring for the night. The waiter was leading them into places they wouldn’t have gone otherwise. As they turned into the alley behind Lemon Martini’s liquor store, they heard a faint rustling, as if somepony were quickly taking off a uniform. Past turned and yelled “Aha!” to… an empty corner. The waiter’s uniform was laying on the ground, next to a pile of empty bottles. As Past and Applebloom entered, they noticed that the alley was a dead end. “Where in the hay could he’ve gone?” Applebloom asked. “Ah’m pretty sure that he didn’t have wings.” “I don’t know,” Past said, “but be on your guard. We need a method of defense… Aha!” Past ran over to the pile of bottles. “We can use these!” Past exclaimed. “Here, grab one and smash it on the corner. That should serve as a weapon.” The two did so, and were now armed. They advanced further into the alley. Suddenly a voice began singing: “How many ponies can I beat today, Too many to count, don’t get in my way.” The voice dropped to the ground, and began walking around the two, continuing to sing: “Hit a mofo over the head with a bow, Magical spell is my last blow.” The figure then stopped all movement, and suddenly all the street lamps in the vicinity were blown out. Suddenly, the two heard an odd sound. “What was that?” Applebloom whispered. “I’m not sure,” Past hissed back. “It sounded like someone unsheathing a knife or a sword.” Suddenly Past was hit from the side. He hit the wall of the alley with a ‘pwaff’. The reason for the pwaff was because the wall had suddenly been replaced with an enormous pillow. “What the heck?” Past exclaimed. Past then felt himself pinned to the ground as the lights turned back up. Past then saw that he was being stood upon by a hooded figure. Past looked up and exclaimed, “Lost?!” Having been discovered, Lost fled from the two who, after a simultaneous nod, ran after the psychotic unicorn. After a few minutes, they came to a large, blue metal dome. “What the hay?” Applebloom yelled. “How are we supposed to get in?” “I have an idea,” Past said, “but it will require one specific pony. She may be the only one who can help us now…”
Mysterious CupcakesThe Wooden Monstrosity was getting nearer. Past Light could feel it. He had been flying at top speed for 15 minutes now and his wings were beginning to cramp up. But he had to keep going. Just a little farther…..Suddenly the worst happened; Past’s wings involuntarily folded into his body. The now flightless pegasus fell to the ground as the monster pounced… “Move it, kid!” The fruit pony glared at the tan-coated pegasus blocking his path for the umpteenth time. Impatiently, the seller dug his hooves into the ground. If the kid didn’t move soon, he’d be late again to the market. Thankfully, the colt got up and trotted off, presumably to one of the “popular places”. The seller anxiously checked the time, and sighed with relief. He still had time to get to his stall. Past slumped disappointedly towards Sugar Cube Corner. Once again, he’d failed to make it all the way from his house to the “store of sweetness”, and his time had even gone up. His cousin Rainbow Dash had made it the same distance in 15 seconds, and her wings hadn’t stopped working. And to top it all off, he was probably late for the pre-training snack. Dejected, he walked slowly towards the counter. He looked up to place his order, and instantly cheered up. His best friend, Lost Control, was ponying the register. Lost Control was a sky-blue coated unicorn with a curly red mane. He was as good at magic as Princess Twilight had been at that age, but magic didn’t seem to be his niche. Instead, his flank was adorned with an erratic spiral as his cutie mark, symbolizing his talent of complete and utter randomness. “Hey there, Past!” Lost said. He was bouncing around the register in no particular pattern. Lost had gotten many of the traits his sister Pinkie Pie carried, including a mild case of ADHD. Past smiled as he tried to decide what to order. As always, there was a veritable encyclopedia of sugar filled treats. Lost noticed his friend’s indecisive glancing and offered a suggestion. “Try these, Buddy!” Lost waved a tray of cupcakes in Past’s face. “They just came in today!” “Okay,” Past took a cupcake off the tray (with much difficulty, I might add) and inspected it. The cupcake itself was cyanish, with a colorful swirl of various frostings adorning the top. It reminded Past of someone, but he wasn’t sure who. Tentatively, Past took a bite of the pastry, and his face lit up with pleasure. In a few seconds, Past had downed the entire dessert. “Wow, these are really good!” Past exclaimed. “I knew you’d like it. Wanna know what we’re calling it?” Lost asked. “Sure,” Past answered. “The Rainbow Dash!” “The what?” “The Rainbow Dash!” Past suddenly realized that Rainbow Dash wasn’t there yet. It was unlike her to be so late, especially when she was meeting Past. Nervously, he asked, “A-Are you saying anything else besides the name?” “Yup, the tagline. ‘Comes from the real Rainbow Dash!’ Pretty good, right? Past? Past, why are you on the floor?” Past’s suspicions had culminated at the word “Rainbow”. He now realized that his cousin had most likely been transformed into a batch of cupcakes. Here is a complete record of his thoughts from the spark of epiphany to his meeting with the floor of Sugar Cube Corner. They turned my cousin into cupcakes! Lost is a psychopath. I wonder if Miss Pinkie helped. Oh my Celestia, this is just like that fanfic I read on the Hoofernet. Why is the ground rushing toward me? Past then blacked out due to his head hitting the floor. The pegasus woke up in a hospital bed. He heard the steady beep of the heart rate monitor as his heart beat in a relaxed rhythm. Past turned his head slightly and found himself staring into the green eyes of Lost Control. “Nice to see you’re awake, Past!” the now suspicious unicorn peppily pronounced. “You want a cupcake?” Lost levitated a cupcake with yellow frosting and slightly orange cake. “We’re calling this one the Applejack!” “Enough!” Past yelled, knocking the “Applejack” out of Lost’s field of magic. “What’s with all the weird cupcakes?! First you give me a cupcake that looks like Rainbow Dash, and now this? Explain to me, Lost, what is going on?” Suddenly, a cyan pegasus burst into the room. It was none other than Rainbow Dash! “Past, what’s wrong? You ate the cupcake I made and then flipped out. Are you okay?” Past looked sheepishly at the two ponies as the cupcake he’d hit detached from the ceiling where it had stuck and fell onto the head of a nurse who had just walked in. “I, uh, kinda thought you were the cupcake.” “Why in Equestria would you think that, Past?” Rainbow asked. “I don’t know. I read a fanfic where Pinkie killed you violently and made you into cupcakes, so I let my imagination run away with me, I guess,” Past admitted. “Well, don’t read those stories again, okay?” Rainbow said. “Okay,” Past replied. Satisfied, Rainbow exited the room. Past turned toward Lost, who was walking towards the window. “How long was I out?” he questioned. “About two weeks,” Lost said casually, now directly in front of the window. “Two weeks?” Past yelled, stunned. “Ee-yup.” Lost said just before he crashed out the 30th story window.
The PitPast leaped up from his bed and rushed to the window. Lost was nowhere to be found, but a large, craggy pit had formed where he should have hit the ground. Past flew out the window to inspect the brand-new cave and hopefully find Lost. Lost himself was currently at the bottom of said pit, unharmed, although not miraculously. As soon as Lost had realized he was falling, he had constructed a magic shield around himself that had dissipated once he’d reached the end of his descent. Unfortunately, Past smashed into Lost almost immediately after his head finished clearing. The two colts sat up, and Past quickly apologized to Lost for smashing his head. However, Lost was not paying attention, but staring at some entity outside the light field created by the hole. Past questioned, “Lost, what exactly are you looking at?” Lost still continued to gaze blankly, mouth hanging open. Past waved a hoof in front of Lost’s blank face, but the pony still continued to gaze blankly over Past’s wing. Past slowly turned around, fearful of what could be lurking in the shadows behind him. Past then gasped at the sight of the thing. It was huge, whitish, and gave off an oddly sweet smell. Past reached out a hoof to touch the monstrosity. The beast's skin felt like...paper. "Lost, bring up the light," Past commanded. Lost obligingly activated his horn, slowly revealing the mound that stood before them. It was... "A cupcake?" Past tilted his head quizzically, observing the gargantuan confection. The dessert looked to be made of chocolate marble cake, with a vanilla frosting heavily applied to its crown. “THIS IS AMAZING!!!” Lost yelled as he dove into the heart of the cupcake. Past amusedly watched the unicorn as he dismantled the dessert from the inside. What? Who is this? Are you… Lost? So what should I do? Why do you keep saying “conspiratorial whisper”? After Lost had finished devouring the cupcake, he trotted over to Past while licking free his cheeks of leftover cake remnants. “There doesn’t appear to be anything else in this cavern,” Lost said. “We should probably leave.” “But how?” Past asked. “The only way out of this pit-“ “Oubliette,” Lost said. “What?” “A prison with a hole in the top as its only exit is called an oubliette. It was on Twilight’s Word-Of-The-Day calendar last week.” “Lost, that’s not even remotely important right now.” Lost suddenly glared at Past with such force that Past felt that he had no choice but to go along with Lost. “Fine. The only way out of this ouibliette was blocked by the cave-in I caused.” “Oh, that’s not a problem. I just learned a teleportation spell from my lessons with Twilight today.” Lost was extremely advanced in magic, but had not been accepted into Princess Celestia’s School For Gifted Unicorns, due to the fact that he had accidentally destroyed the Audition Tower with a magnitude Seven earthquake. As a result, Princess Twilight had agreed to teach the colt more advanced magic that Cheerilee, being an Earth pony, could not give lessons on. Lost’s horn began to glow, and ten seconds later, he’d disappeared. Past, however, was still in the cave when Lost popped back in. “Why did you leave me behind?!” Past half whined, half shouted. “Sorry. I had to make sure the spell would work; I’d never attempted to teleport so great a distance before,” Lost explained, with an expert use of a semicolon that only a truly great writer could impleme- Sorry. Ahem. Past nodded in consent, thankful that Lost had actually had a reason for leaving him behind. Lost extended a hoof towards Past, who then formed an epic brohoof by bumping Lost’s hoof with his own. Soon, the two colts were standing on the grass just beside the now blocked entrance to the pit- Oh. Right. They were standing beside the now blocked entrance to the oubliette while a very surprised Rainbow Dash looked on. Past turned his head and said “Dashie? Why are you here?” “Well,” Rainbow Dash began to explain, “I was flying away from the hospital when I saw a hugely epic explosion. Being the totally awesome hero that I am, I turned around and flew back to see if I could lend a hoof. But seeing as how everything’s fine now, I guess I’ll go help Pinkie Mmpfh!” Rainbow quickly covered her mouth with her hoof and ran away. “Past, did you just see that?” Lost asked. “Yeah, are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Past replied. “SUPER EPIC STAKEOUT TIME!” the two shouted, and immediately ran after Rainbow.
Trailing the RainbowRainbow Dash had very nearly bucked up. Pinkie Pie had told her not to tell anyone about their secret meeting, and she’d very nearly let it slip to the two colts. If they had found out… She’d Pinkie promised to tell no one of the meeting, and if she had broken that promise, she’d have lost Pinkie as a friend- “FOREEEEEVVVEEEERRRR!” Pinkie shouted from across the market as she trotted up to Rainbow. “Pinkie, I don’t even want to know how you read my mind,” Rainbow said. “Silly, I didn’t read your mind!” Pinkie replied. “Oh, ok.” “I read the rough draft.” “Okay, Pinkie,” Rainbow conceded, seeing that it was fruitless to question the pink pony, “let’s just go to…” “My house,” Pinkie offered. “Yeah, your house, and…bake the pie.” Lost and Past watched all of this discussion from inside a bush. Past whispered sharply, “They’re on the move! Let’s go!” “Just a second, Watson,” Lost said in a Braytish accent. “I’m looking for clues.” “WE NEED TO GO!” Past yelled, eliciting attention from all the ponies in the market. “Stop playing ‘Sherlock Hooves’ and help me.” “Fine,” Lost said, discarding his hat and cape, “forgive me for trying to add a little fun to the stakeout.” The two ponies promptly ran after the two Elements. After following the trail for a few minutes, the pegasus and unicorn came to an enormous waterfall. They scouted around for clues as to where the two Elements had gone, but came up empty-hooved. “I don’t understand!” Past exasperatedly yelled. “They didn’t go left, they didn’t go right, and they didn’t go up! Did they just disappear into thin air?” “Nope. They went in there,” Lost said, pointing to the waterfall. “Lost, I think you’re going insane,” Past said. “There’s nothing there but water and rock.” “Nonsense! Here, I’ll show you,” Lost said. The blue unicorn then charged into the raging rapids. Past waited. Any second now, Lost would hit the rock wall and yell “OW!” But the “OW” never came. Curious, Past walked up to, and eventually through, the waterfall. On the other side was, as Lost had said, a cavernous tunnel leading into the mountain, with Lost standing smugly in the entrance. “Toldja so, Past,” Lost trumpeted, “TOL-DJA.” “Fine, you told me. Let’s go find Rainbow and Pinkie,” Past said as they began to walk down the tunnel. Soon, however, they came to a steel door. A voice emanated from the other side of the door and said, “This door be locked with magic spells, And every living thing foretells, That if you wrongly reply to this, The riddle, you’ll die because you missed!” A different voice now asked them the riddle, a voice that was unmistakably Pinkie’s. “Here’s your riddle! What word rhymes with orange? Can you answer that?” Past and Lost whispered many solutions to each other, but none of them seemed right. Finally Lost said, “I think I know how to get past this door.” Lost trotted up to the door as it repeated its question. “What word rhymes with orange? Can you answer that?” “Nope!” Lost said. “I can’t answer it!” Buck, Past thought. We’re dead for sure. Suddenly, the door swung open, to reveal… another door. This door, however, was wooden, and the two could hear noises on the other side. Curious, the two put their ears to the door. A slurping sound could be heard, and for a second, that was all. Then somepony that was obviously Dash moaned, “Pinkie, please stop…” “I can’t help it, Dashie! It’s too sweet!” Horrified, the two flung open the door, to reveal Pinkie gleefully licking- -The walls of the cave, while Rainbow Dash facehoofed nearby. Well, what did you think was happening? Pervert. The cave’s walls were coated with a crystalline substance, which appeared to be what Pinkie was licking. Puzzled, Lost put his tongue to the wall and took a tentative lick. “It’s sugar!” “Really?” Past said, and began to lick the wall as well. “You’re right! Girls, what’s going on?” “Well, um, you see, Pinkie had run out of sugar at Sugar Cube Corner, and asked me if I wanted to help get some more. We came to the cave, and she just started licking the walls,” Rainbow explained. “That’s right!” Pinkie said, having finally stopped licking the walls. “And here’s something to thank you for your help.” She displayed a piece of sugar the size of a cake. “Wow, thanks, Pinkie!” Rainbow said. She and Pinkie left the cave, talking about sugar. “So, Past, you wanna go do something?” Lost asked. “Sorry, buddy, I can’t. Me and the other Crusaders are doing something. You wanna come with?” Past asked in return. “Sure,” Lost replied, and the two walked back to Ponyville. When they passed by the lake, however, their plans changed. The lake was filled with sea serpents, all diving and attacking each other, and something else. When Past and Lost ran around to get a better look, they were distraught to discover that the something… was Applebloom.
A Very Special SomeponyWarning- Shipping ahead! Lost and Past instantly dove into action. “You get Applebloom out while I subdue the monsters!” Lost yelled, firing up his horn. Past, hearing this, flew up to the clouds, looking for an opening. Lost, meanwhile, was tying the beasts down with tendrils of red magic, slowly increasing the chances of Applebloom’s rescue. Past saw an opening, and quickly swooped to the water, plucked the filly out, and deposited her on safe ground as Lost finished up his part of the job. “Excellent magic work, if I do say so myself,” Lost said, “and I do.” He ran over to Past and Applebloom. Past was methodically checking her body for any injury. Lost, seeing this, went over and offered a suggestion. “Uh, Past.” “What is it, Lost?” Past asked. “Now this is just a small suggestion, but you might want to get her breathing.” Past, hearing this, rapidly checked her chest for signs of life. As Lost had said, there were none. “Oh, shit, what should I do?” he asked himself. Lost gave an evil grin. “Weeelllllll… you could try giving her mouth-to-mouth,” he said, trying to hold back a burst of laughter. “WHAT?!” “Mouth to Mouth.” Lost’s attempts to hold back his laughter failed. He fell to the ground, hooves on his belly as he exploded, positively tickled. “You (chheee) know, (ppffhhhee) when you take your mouth (blahaha) and put it (gahaiii) on hers! Bahahahahaha!” Lost was now unable to speak, so much was he laughing. “Shut up, man!” Past yelled. He then turned his attention to Applebloom (trying to ignore the background noise) and began trying everything he could think of to get the water out of her lungs. Finally, when all else had failed, Past ground his teeth… and began giving the filly CPR. This, it seemed, was actually working. After a while, she began breathing enough where he could finally stop. He watched her for several tense seconds, but she eventually coughed out the remaining water and sat up. “What’s the last thing you remember?” Past questioned. Applebloom replied, “Well, ah was walkin’ ta the clubhouse for tha meetin’ and ah got pulled inta the lake by them sea critters.” “All right then.” Past stood and asked, “Should we go to the clubhouse? Sweetie and Scootaloo are probably worried, and- “Just a sec,” Applebloom said. “Why is Lost on the ground over there?” Lost had finally stopped laughing and was now looking at the two of them intently, waiting for the next line. “He was laughing because… I gave you CPR,” Past admitted. “You WHAT?” “BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!” Lost burst into laughter again at Applebloom’s reaction. Both her and Past had become as red as Applebloom’s mane. The two simultaneously turned to Lost and said, “SHUT UP!” “I’m sorry! It was just so hilarious!” the unicorn explained. Lost got to his feet and said, “Let’s just get to your clubhouse.” “Hold on a minute,” Applebloom said. “There’s somethin’ ah need ta do first.” She then walked up to Past, leaned over, and kissed him. “Ah love you, Past Light,” she- Shipping. Because-Wait, I don’t need to justify my actions to you! I am your God! Continue with the story! Now, where was I? Oh right. “Ah love you, Past Light,” she said. “Ohh Snaaap!” Lost said. “I love you too!” the surprised pegasus said. “Double Oh Snap!” Lost said. “I’ve had a crush on you since Hearts and Hooves Day two years ago!” they said together. “Triple Oh Snap with a WTF cherry!” Lost said. “Let’s go on a date,” Past said. “I’ll take you to Sugar Cube Corner at five.” “Okay, see you then!” Applebloom said, and ran to the clubhouse. Past stood there for a bit, his mouth hanging open. “What just happened?” he asked himself. “I’ll tell ya what happened! My best buddy just got a smokin’ hot date!” Lost said. “Is this a dream?” “Have I become a carrot?” “No…” “Then you’re awake!” Lost dragged Past to the clubhouse. “Let’s get you nice and ready for your date!”
Dinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 1Past and Lost walked through the streets of Ponyville, talking in loud, excited tones. Lost, in order to give Past some coaching on his date, had elected to take the “scenic route” through the town. “Now, fillies are… like… um,” Past stuttered, reviewing the material that Lost had gone over. “Bees. They’ll sting you if you agitate them, but if you keep them happy, they’ll ooze honey,” Lost explained metaphorically. “Ooze? That just sounds gross!” Past said. “Okay, bad example. But the principle is there. Now, how do you keep her happy?” “Listen to her, be nice, and above all… be yourself,” Past recited. “EXCELLENT! You pass with flying colors,” Lost cheered. “And just in time, too. We have arrived at Sugar Cube Corner!” “Okay,” Past said, taking a deep breath. He was beginning to walk up to the door when Lost put a hoof on his shoulder, halting him. “Listen, I have something I need you to do for me,” Lost said. Using his magic, he took a red envelope out of his saddlebags and placed it on Past’s hoof. On the envelope, in bluish ink, were written the words “Sweetie Belle”. Past, seeing this, began to grin evilly. “Heh, ‘Sweetie Belle’. Soooo, you have a crush on Sweetie!” Past said gleefully. “Can you just tell AB to give Sweetie that?” Lost asked in a frustrated tone, “Not yet. Remember how you gave me hell during that whole business earlier? Well, now it’s my turn!” Past whooped. He then proceeded to chant repeatedly, “Lost likes Sweetie! Lost likes Sweetie!” over and over. “Shut up, man!” Lost yelled. “Okay, fine,” Past said, stopping his cheers. “I guess I’ll see you in a bit, then.” “Okay, see ya in a bit,” Lost replied. Having finished the conversation, Past went into the store. Lost watched him go, then teleported away… and reappeared on a narrow ledge overlooking Ponyville. He was now wearing a white, hooded robe, with the hood pulled over his head. A gauntlet that appeared to have a springloaded knife on it was strapped to his right foreleg. Lost raised his leg, and the blade popped out of its sheath. He brandished it a few times, and then set his leg back down, resetting the blade with this action. Lost stood like this for a while. His eyes tracked an eagle that flew overhead. Suddenly, Lost raised his head and smiled. He gave a slight nod in the direction of the eagle, and leaped off the ledge. The unicorn landed in a bale of hay, and when he exited, his outfit had changed again. The robe and gauntlet had gone, and in their place was a SSC waiter’s uniform. His hair had been dyed brown, and been combed to replace its usual haphazard style. He also wore a fake mustache. The newly disguised Lost now pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill. “Alright, let’s see here,” Lost said, and began going down a sort of list, crossing out each item as he read it. “Give letter to Past: check; reference ‘Assassin’s Creed’: check; put on disguise: check; stealth Past’s date: not check.” He stopped, then looked slightly to the left, at the ream of words that nopony else could see: the words that had driven him slightly insane. Giving an odd smile, he said, “Well, I guess I need to check that off; eh, reader?” Having said this, Lost turned and entered through the “Employees Only” door, prepared to eavesdrop on the couple. And, more importantly, take their order. Past scanned the restaurant until he found AB at a table near the center. As he strolled over to her, he couldn't help but admire the decor. Not many ponies knew that at 4:30 CPT (Central Pony Time), the restaurant was taken over by Fancy Pancy, an Earth Pony whose talent was, well, being fancy. As a result, the normally spastically decorated restaurant became a wonderful place to take a special somepony out on a fancy date. “Hey, AB!” Past said as he sat down on a rather elegantly embroidered cushion. “Hey there, Past,” Applebloom replied. She seems a little distracted, Past thought. “What’s wrong?” he asked tentatively. “Oh, nothin’. Ah was just thinkin’ ‘bout Sweetie. I think she might be sick…” Applebloom began to say, but she was cut off by the sudden appearance of their rather loud waiter. “Hallo!” the waiter said/shouted. He had a rather thick accent, but what, Past couldn’t place. The waiter was wearing the standard uniform, and his hair was neatly clipped. He also had a fine mustache, and looked to be kinda short.”Vat’d you two like to drink?” Past glanced at the choices, and then said, “I’ll have a root beer, please.” “And vat vould de ladee like?” the server asked, looking at the table, and at the two ponies’ hooves, almost as if he were looking for something. “Ah’ll have an apple cider,” Applebloom said. “Ah, very good. Your drinks shall be out in a moment,” the server said. As the server left, Past suddenly twitched, and made like he was going to get up from his seat, but then sat back down, having changed his mind. “Past, what was that?” Applebloom asked curiously. “What was what?” Past replied. “That seat thing y’all just did. What was that about?” Applebloom explained. “Oh. Right.” Past began to fidget in his seat. “I've been noticing some odd things about our waiter, things that I can’t explain.” “Like what?” “Like the way he kept glancing at the table, and our hooves. Like the way his accent seems forced. And there’s this one thing that’s staying in my mind. When he turned away from us, I saw something. Now, it was just for an instant, but I could’ve sworn he had… a spiral cutie mark.”
Dinner at the Sugar Cube Cafe: Part 2“So, AB, what were you saying about Sweetie?” Past asked. “Well, she’s been actin’ weird since y’all ‘n Lost arrived at the clubhouse earlier today,” Applebloom explained. “Come to think about it, she’s always actin’ strange when something’s gotta do with Lost. Like when we first formed the club, fer instance. She was all upset when Lost had ta leave the club on account of his Cutie Mark turnin’ up.” “I think I know what the reason may be,” Past said, thinking of the envelope in his saddlebags. “And what, pray tell, would that be?” Applebloom asked. “I’ll tell you afterwards,” Past replied as the waiter came up with their drinks. “Here you arr, sier,” the waiter said, placing their drinks on the table with two arms of magic. “Vun root beer for you and vun apple cider for ze geerl.” “Thank you,” the two ponies said. “Is there aneezing else you vould like?” the waiter asked. “Remember, ve close in tventy minootes.” “No, thank you,” Past said, as he was not feeling hungry. Applebloom said the same. “Hokay,” the waiter said, leaving the two alone. The two ponies then began to make small talk. As they conversed, they realized they enjoyed many of the same things, such as competing athletically, baking, and exploration. Applebloom took sewing lessons with Rarity, while Past took flying lessons with Rainbow Dash. The two came to know each other well in the next few hours. However, Past became aware that the waiter who had served them was watching them both intently. Past was unnerved by the waiter, but decided to do something later. Past took out the envelope and slid it over to Applebloom. “Past, what’s this?” she asked. “It’s a letter for Sweetie Belle, apparently. Lost gave it to me, so I could give it to you, so you could give it to her,” Past explained. “And that brings me to my next point. I know Lost has a crush on Sweetie, and based on what you told me earlier, the feeling is mutual. “I have a theory that the two of them like each other, but neither one knows it. It’s like one of those cliché romantic comedies. But now, Lost has made a move, but he’s afraid of rejection, so he told her in the form of an anonymous letter.” “That explains everything!” Applebloom exclaimed. Just then, the one-minute warning came on over the restaurant intercom. “Ah guess ah need ta go now. I’ll get this ta Sweetie, don’t worry.” The filly got up and headed for the door of the restaurant. “Wait, hold up!” Past said, chasing after Applebloom. “I need your help with something.” “What would that be?” Applebloom asked, puzzled. “The waiter. He was watching us all through the chat we had. I think he may be a criminal in disguise. I want to investigate him,” Past explained. “Well, it seems kinda strange ta me. But, ah guess ah’ll help you,” Applebloom consented. “Excellent!” Past said. Just then, the waiter slipped out the back door of the shop. Past, noticing this, shouted “He’s on the move!” The two ponies then dashed after the waiter. It was now eight o’ clock, and dusk was settling over Ponyville. As Past and Applebloom raced through the streets, they were thankful that most ponies were already retiring for the night. The waiter was leading them into places they wouldn’t have gone otherwise. As they turned into the alley behind Lemon Martini’s liquor store, they heard a faint rustling, as if somepony were quickly taking off a uniform. Past turned and yelled “Aha!” to… an empty corner. The waiter’s uniform was laying on the ground, next to a pile of empty bottles. As Past and Applebloom entered, they noticed that the alley was a dead end. “Where in the hay could he’ve gone?” Applebloom asked. “Ah’m pretty sure that he didn’t have wings.” “I don’t know,” Past said, “but be on your guard. We need a method of defense… Aha!” Past ran over to the pile of bottles. “We can use these!” Past exclaimed. “Here, grab one and smash it on the corner. That should serve as a weapon.” The two did so, and were now armed. They advanced further into the alley. Suddenly a voice began singing: “How many ponies can I beat today, Too many to count, don’t get in my way.” The voice dropped to the ground, and began walking around the two, continuing to sing: “Hit a mofo over the head with a bow, Magical spell is my last blow.” The figure then stopped all movement, and suddenly all the street lamps in the vicinity were blown out. Suddenly, the two heard an odd sound. “What was that?” Applebloom whispered. “I’m not sure,” Past hissed back. “It sounded like someone unsheathing a knife or a sword.” Suddenly Past was hit from the side. He hit the wall of the alley with a ‘pwaff’. The reason for the pwaff was because the wall had suddenly been replaced with an enormous pillow. “What the heck?” Past exclaimed. Past then felt himself pinned to the ground as the lights turned back up. Past then saw that he was being stood upon by a hooded figure. Past looked up and exclaimed, “Lost?!” Having been discovered, Lost fled from the two who, after a simultaneous nod, ran after the psychotic unicorn. After a few minutes, they came to a large, blue metal dome. “What the hay?” Applebloom yelled. “How are we supposed to get in?” “I have an idea,” Past said, “but it will require one specific pony. She may be the only one who can help us now…”
