Tag, You're It

Discord was bored. Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored!

It wasn't fair! He made a promise to no longer use his magic to wreak havoc on the land of Equestria, in return, Twilight and her precious cavalcade of friends promised to keep him amused. Amused, pah!

No sooner was she assured he wasn't going to make it rain chocolate or - heavens forbid - replace the grass with cotton candy did she run off, leaving him alone to entertain himself.

Pfft, as if he'd ever do something as boring as that. No, the way forward was flowers which eject sneezing powder whenever somepony gets close, maybe incorporate them as a nice water installation in the Ponyville main square. Just think! The installation could cause ponies to shrink every time they interacted with it: Some hapless mare comes along, throws a bit in and wishes for a manly stallion to fulfill her wildest night time fantasies and BLAM! She's suddenly looking for a pony to fulfill her wildest not-getting-stomped-on fantasies!

Oh! And what about the sky? Blue, that was so last year darling! What about 'burning terror of a thousand-dying-suns' red? Or at least a very nice shade of cherry?

Hmmm, mind you, cinnamon might do more to open up Equestria as a space. Cinnamon. Cherry. What about maroon? Or burnt amber?

Whatever, the color didn't really matter. The pisce de resistance of his sky masterpiece: Meteors screaming down from the sky, wreaking havoc on the residents below. Of course, these falling rocks weren't dangerous - he was a draconiquus after all, not a monster - all they did was a little... redecoration. Just think - ink splattered everwhere! All the colours of the rainbow! No rhyme or reason to it, just color for the fun of it! With any luck, Celestia would look up at the morning sun and get a horrible shade of sewer brown all over her smug little white coat... yes... perhaps that could be arranged...

Discord sighed. It was no use - no sooner did all these brilliant ideas pop into his head did Fluttershy's voice ring in his ears: "And if you want to remain friends, you'll stop thinking whatever it is what you're thinking!"

Unless...

I suppose he could wreak havoc without use of his magic; he was master of manipulation after all. All it would take is a little sweet talk and she'd be putty in his hands...

He cackled maniacally.

Twilight opened her eyes to another bright and beautiful morning in Ponyville. She let out a tired yawn and stretched out her wings, aching from another night of sleeping on them awkwardly. One day she'd get used to the blasted things. One day.

"Spike! I'm going to need my list of things to do this morning, pronto! And while you're at it, get me a glass of freshly pressed apple juice!"

"Yes master..." Spike grumbled.

"What was that? Didn't quite catch you."

Spike returned to his usual jovial tone. "Of course Twilight! Anything for my favorite Princess of Ponyville!"

"Awwww," Twilight thought to herself, "the little dragon's so tired he can barely form sentences, maybe I'll get that juice myself..."

"Soon I'll be free of your clutches you winged harridan." Spike muttered to himself. He picked up the list from the ground, resisted the urge to spit on it, and eyed it. His heart stopped.

It couldn't be... No. Nononononono. Right between '#34 categorize my archived lists' and '#35 Bask in the glory of all your lists being in their Proper Place' was '#34.5 Gormlessly stand outside my treehouse library.'

Someone had messed with one of Her lists!

There would be hell to pay.

"Spike, I'm going to need that list now..."

"Errrr... Coming Twilight!" Maybe she wouldn't notice.

Trembling slightly, Spike handed her the list. He still remembered the last time. Rainbow Dash had told him how oh so important it was she visited a pony called 'Seymour Butts' that morning - in fact, why didn't he add it onto her to do list right now, just to ensure she doesn't forget...

The ensuring rampage had taken him all day to clean up.

Her warm expression turned to stone as she scanned the list.

No Twilight, I can erase it out, just give me a second... Please Twilight, I just put all those books in order... No Twilight, not the schoolfillies, they haven't done anything wrong... Ow! That didn't mean start taking it out on me...

"Spike, what is this?"

"Your morning to-do list?"

"No Spike, right here, '#34.5 Gormlessly stand outside my treehouse library."

"I didn't do it."

"Spike, it would really help if-

"I didn't do it."

"Spike! If I could just get to the bottom of this then-"

" Eu não entendo a sua língua. Por favor, desligue e tente novamente."

"Spike," Twilight grimaced, "I suggest you start talking now, or else I'll go around town trying to find out who is responsible - only this time, I won't be quite so polite."

It was no good, her eye had gotten that twitch again - who knew how long it would be before she snapped?

"Fine. I don't know who - or what - did it, but it sounds like a message. I'm sure if you go wait outside the treehouse the perpetrator will make themselves known soon enough."

No response.

"Twilight?"

"Yes... wait outside Twilight will. Find out who did this... Punish them..." As she stalked off, she began to hum the tune to 'Daisy'.

Uh-oh. She'd started muttering to herself - that's how it began last time. Slowly, the idea that something in her world was out of place would eat away at her mind; before long, there would be no hope for any pony.

Spike hoped for the sake of Ponyville the responsible party would show up - in the meantime, he was going to hide someplace far away.

Author's Note

This is adapted from a very similar series I did a few years back - I thought 'hey, why not ponies?' Also, to save you from going to google translate, Spike says 'I don't understand your language. Please hang up and try again.' in Portuguese.