Mob of the Dead: Equestria.

by LeCanadianSniperInkling

Rating: mature
Tags: Crossover, Tragedy, Dark, Human, Romance
Length: 3214

What if Weasel, Finn, Sal, and Billy didn't crash the plane on the GG Bridge? What if something, magical, happened when the lighting bolt was charged with the Elements of Harmony?

As our four zombie slayers/gangsters/prisoners escaped Alcatraz, the demon known as Brutus grabbed on and went with them. Using his dark energy, he got ready to teleport the four escapees to Hell for their crimes and past sins.

At the same time, in Equestrian, the Elements suddenly charged themselves and shot some sort of magical bolt of energy toward a scheduled lightning storm. This then opened a doorway between the worlds.

What happens now? What will these four escapees think about living in a world full of Technicolored ponies, and what will they ponies think of having four dangerous men? But more importantly, where's the guard?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-31 03:07:54 UTC

Escape.

It was silent in the San Francisco Bay. Well, if you count fireworks going of above San Francisco on New Years Eve as silent. People were cheering and having fun. The children got to stay up late, the adults had drinks, and the sky was illuminated with the bright colors of the fireworks. But our story doesn't begin there, the story I will tell you is on a little island that has a prison. This place was known as Alcatraz. Also known as Evil Island by the inmates of the prison. And you are about to find out why.

                                                                                          0-0-0

"KEEP 'EM OFFA ME! I'M ALL OUT!" screamed out an Irish prisoner who was currently fighting a horde of undead flesh-bags with three other prisoners. The other three kept shooting the never ending horde. One of the prisoners that wore the prisoner clothing, but had slicked hair, weld a gun called the M-TAR, another prisoner wore a brown leather jacket and a hat, that was carrying a gun known as the Blundergat. The last that prisoner wore a previously plain white tee shirt shot a few rounds from his M1921 SMG. Their names were Sal, Finn, Weasel, and Billy.  These four escapees knew that they wouldn't survive long if they left Alcatraz Island, which was covered in undead beings.

"Billy! Finn! Use yer shields to keep those things in the doorway! Me and Weasel are gonna finish the plane!" cried out Sal, who sprayed a mag into the horde. The bullets had zero effect, but it helped anyway.

"Well why the fuck are you guys standin' there?! GO!" screamed the psychotic Billy Handsome, pulling out his shield and propping it on the bottom half of the doorway. Finn placed his shield on the top section of the door. Sal and Weasel didn't waste this opportunity of escape and built the plane right away. They connected the engine with the propellers, they then placed the engine into the frame of the plane and bolted it on. They hooked the control valves with the engine, then added the sheets to the wings of the plane. And finally, filled the gas tank with gas and started it.

"It's working! It's fucking working!" cried out Weasel, "Alright guys, when I say run, you run to the plane. Finn! Tilt your shield so can throw a pineapple bomb into the horde!"

Finn tilted his shield and waited. Weasel pulled out a grenade, pulled the pin, and threw it. The explosion created many crawlers, but were too slow to catch up.

"RUN GUYS! IN THE PLANE BEFORE ANYMORE SHOW UP!" ordered Weasel.

"Didn't need to scream, Weasel. We're right here..."

Then they heard the familiar sound. The sound that announced the approach of the demon. The guard. Him. Brutus.

"And that's where you will stay so I will finish you off!" said the demonic voice of Brutus.

"GET ON THE PLANE!!!" cried Sal.

Billy and Finn climbed on the plane and aimed there weapons at the doorway, ready for the armored zombie. They then heard the sound of Brutus spawning in, just below them. As soon as the guard emerged in the doorway, they all opened fired. They couldn't aim for the head because of how unstable they all were. The plane finally moved forward.

"And where do you think your going?" said Brutus as he grabbed the plane and joined the ride.

"Shoot 'em! Shoot 'em" cried Finn.

"You four have some time to do in Hell!" said Brutus. He then created a fiery portal on the storm cloud the were heading for.

"Aw hell!" said Finn. But then the portal flashed white, and then it turned into a multicolored portal. They didn't have time to scream as they were all enveloped in a rainbow tunnel. The tunnel only for a few seconds before they went out through the other side. They were now in a dark, rainy, cloudy sky. Thunder boomed, lightning illuminated the sky, and rain pelted the plane and it's passengers.

"Holy fuck! I can barely see! Weasel, why is the plane jolting?!?" asked Billy.

"I can't control it! We're goin' down!" screamed a frantic Weasel.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" they all screamed.

They were going to crash into the ground. They were going to die. In the middle of a forest.

"WELL WE MADE THIS FAR!! AT LEAST IT'S BETTER THAN BEING DEVOURED BY ZOMBIES!!" Sal screamed.

They were now only 15 meters away from the ground.

14...

13...

12..

11...

10...

9...

8...

7...

6...

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...

SMASH.

Then, they all died. Nobody even saw them. Nobody knew what happens to the four prisoners.

They only things that saw them were the residents of the nearby town. The town's name you ask? The crashed near Ponyville, Equestria. And six certain ponies saw the whole thing.

                                                                                          -0-0-0-0-

"Uh, Rainbow? Why was there a scheduled rainstorm again?" asked Twilight Sparkle.

"Well the south end of Ponyville received more sunlight then the rest of the town, which dried up a little. So the Weather Team scheduled it so the dirt could dampen up." Replied the tomboyish Pegasus.

"But did it have to cover the whole town?" asked the bookworm.

"Hey! I have perfect reason for why we did this, ok? So, first, we-"

"TWILIGHT! TWILIGHT! DOOR DOOR WET COLD HELP RAIN!" cried out a Unicorn stallion as he rushed towards the Golden Oaks Library door. The stallion then pounded the door.

"Coming!" cried the lavender mare.

She opened the door, and was greeted by a wet silver grey stallion with an electric orange mane that had a black streak across, similar to Twilight's.

"Echelon!? What are you doing here? Not that I don't want you here, though." asked Twilight, who then gave him a seductive look at the last sentence.

"Maybe if I can come in, I'll tell you. And Twilight, you look lovely." said Echelon.

Twilight stepped to the side to let him in. Echelon dripped rain water as he walked in.

"Oh wait. I'm wet. Gimme a second.". His horn glowed a crimson red as he prepared a spell. He then casted it and he was instantly dry.

"There, better." Stated the dry Unicorn.

"Hey Echelon! What brings ya here?" asked Rainbow.

"GGGAAAAAASSSSSPPPPP!! ECHELON IS HERE!?!?" screamed Pinkie Pie, "THAT MAKES A SEVEN PONY SLEEPOVER! THIS SLEEPOVER JUST GOT BETTER!"

"Yeah. I'm here to spend the night because of two reasons. One: I can't spend a whole day without seeing Twilight's beautiful eyes," said Echelon, who looked over to Twilight, who was blushing, " and two, there is a whole tree on my house.". He then casted a gaze on Rainbow, who then gained interest at the new book arrivals. The five other mares looked at the cyan Pegasus.

"Rainbow. Did ya  purposely make the winds stronger to crash into Echo's house?" asked Applejack.

"NO! I WOULD NEVER DO THAT! IT WAS AN ACCIDENT, I SWEAR!" Rainbow yelled.

"I'm not saying it was on purpose girls. I was just telling you why I came here. I didn't mean to start a rivalry."

"Why, Echelon, darling. There's nothing to fret about!" Rarity said.

"Hey Twilight. You got that book yet?" asked the Unicorn.

"Yep. I actually sorted the library and I know where it is. Follow me." Twilight said. As the two walked to one of the book shelves, Echelon couldn't help it and stared at her marefriend's rump. He was automatically turned on by the sight. Part off him wanted to reach his hoof over and give it a quick squeeze.

"Not now, Echelon. Maybe later when everypony's asleep." said Twilight as she playfully swished her tail.

"Oh alright. Only because I respect your boundaries." Echelon said with a smug grin. Twilight giggled at this. She reached over with her lips and connected with his. They then fell into a deep, passionate kiss. The other five mares looked away.

"Wow. Those two lovebirds sure do care about each other." said Rainbow.

"I'm happy for those two." Fluttershy added in.

"I hope I get to throw the wedding party! It'll be awesome!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Ah still can't those two met at Sugercube Corner after mah sister and her friends almost burnt down the place. Twilight was tryin' tah douse the place with gallons of water while Echo was evacuating the place. Strange, huh?" asked Applejack.

"Strange how love works. Don't you think?" asked Rarity. They all nodded in agreement. Twilight and Echelon broke the kiss and looked into each others eyes.

"I love you, Echo."

"love you too, Twilight." Echelon responded. As he turned around to grab the book, he noticed something. The Elements of Harmony were in a case by the bookshelf.

"Hey Twilight. Why are the Elements here? Shouldn't they be in Canterlot?" asked Echo.

"Princess Celestia sent a letter saying that since I'm her #1 student, she said that I was responsible enough to keep them here in Ponyville. Cool, huh?"

"As cool as ice." responded Echo, "Well I guess I'll start studying then. Go enjoy yourself." said Twilight.

And with that, Echelon started to read. Twilight rejoined the group and sat down.

"So Twilight. Got any plans for you and Echo tonight? Perhaps a special evening?" asked Rarity.

"Me and Echo were thinking about 'spending the night' together, if you know what I mean." responded Twilight, emphasizing on the words "spending the night".

"And how many times have you done 'it' before?" asked Rainbow.

"RAINBOW!" exclaimed Applejack.

"What? Just asking." she replied.

"It's alright A.J, Rainbow, that's kind of personal." said Twilight.

"Sorry I asked. I was just wondering in case you're, you know, pregnant." stated Rainbow.

"No. I'm not pregnant." Twilight responded.

"Now if I can just focus on the spell, I'll be  able to-"

"TWILIGHT" called Spike.

"AH!" Echo said as he was suddenly engulfed by a blinding light. After a few moments, the light died down and revealed Echo laying face first on the ground, not moving.

"ECHO! ECHO, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!? SAY SOMETHING!" cried a frantic Twilight.

"Uh, that was cool. Didn't mention me not being able to move. Maybe it didn't work, maybe I was to oh hey! There we go. Ragdoll mode, engage!" said a now ragdoll Echo as he rolled around the floor aimlessly, while the Mane 6 laughed at the sight. As Echelon rolled around the ground, he smashed against the basement door, opening it in the process.

"Let's see what secrets you got down here, Twilight." Echelon said as he slid through the doorway.

"Yep. He's a cool guy, Twilight. You are pretty lucky. Especially for-"

"U-u-u-h-h-h g-g-i-i-r-r-l-l-s-s?" asked Pinkie, who was shaking violently.

"Pinkie what's going on with you." Rainbow said. Her question was answered after the Elements were suddenly charged. After a few seconds, a multicolored lightning bolt fired at the thunder storm. Once it hit, it created a portal. What came out of the portal shocked them. It appeared to be a giant, metal bird with four figures on the wings, and the thing was going down quickly towards the Everfree Forest. Although it disappeared from there line of sight, the heard the sound of metal crashing and...screams of pain? Although they didn't know what it was, we know exactly what it is. It was the plane from Alcatraz. And the figures were Sal, Finn, Billy, and Weasel. And the screams of pain, were them dying.

First Contact.

Ringing was all Finn could hear in his ears. The constant ringing that was starting to annoy him. He tried to get up on his feet slowly, but the end result was popping up. As he opened his eyes, everything he saw had a hint of blue. Then, he remembered. The crash. The portal. Alcatraz. He had died, he was in Afterlife Mode. He looked down and saw his body, eyes twitching, pained look plastered on his face, and holding the M1911 in his hand. He looked back up and saw three other ghostly figures.

"Guys!" Finn called, attempting to get their attention. He was surprised to hear to other three call back.

"Right here, Finn!" cried the Weasel-voiced ghost.

"Same here!" cried Billy.

"Alive and kicking! Well, not really alive. Aw fuck, you get the point!"

"Well, should we go back to our bodies, or explore the place? Because my Afterlife Meter isn't goin' down at all for some reason." Finn asked, awaiting an answer.

"I say we all scout the place, in case the place isn't another hellhole." Billy suggested. Weasel and Sal agreed. As soon as soon as the conversation ended, they ran towards the opposite direction, towards the portal the went through. Before they crashed, Billy saw a village that had inhabitants. Maybe they could ask for their help.

"Were are we going, Billy?" asked Weasel.

"I saw some kind of village as soon as we went through the portal. If we could gain their trust, the might get us the fuck outta here." Billy responded.

"Oh sure. Yeah, I know exactly what we're gonna say, ' Hi. We're a group of mobsters that escaped a high security prison and fought off a million zombies in cold blood. Could you help us?" Weasel said sarcastically.

"That could work." Billy replied.

"I was being sarcastic, Billy." said Weasel.

"Guys, look. I think I see the village Billy saw." said Sal. And sure enough, there it was. The village Billy saw. The whole town looked soaked from the rain. The wind swayed the trees violently. And there was... a giant tree house?

"Guys, you see that? That looks like a fucking tree house, literally!" said Finn, shocked that the inhabitants could do such thing.

"Alright guys. Here's the plan. Weasel, you run to that giant building in the center of the town, jump to the top, and keep a look out. Finn, run through the west section of the town and scout. Sal, take the middle section. I'll take the east and do as what we're all doing. Remember, we're basically invisible, so don't worry about being seen. Once we're done scouting, we'll go back into our bodies and take shelter under the plane wreck. For guns, we only got our pistols for now. Our weapons might have scattered around the crash sight. Sound like a plan?" asked Billy.

"I'm in."

"Count me in!"

"Better than doing nothing."

"Alright, let's go."

And with that, they all split up.

Weasels POV:

Weasel ran to the town center as fast as he could. Nobody would see him, so he didn't have to be sneaky. He jumped to the first floor of the town center. He saw Finn in  the west side, moving fast and slow. Billy was doing his job in the eastside. Sal was doing good in the central part. After waiting for minutes, he got bored. They were all doing fine, so why not have some fun with the locals? He looked around to find a well lit house. There. The tree house. The lights were still on. Perfect. Jumping off the town hall, he raced to the tree house and peered into the house through the window. What he saw shocked him. There were seven Technicolored ponies talking in a small group. He decided to listen to what they were saying.

"- crashed in the Everfree Forest! And there were four weird ape thingies on the wing of the bird! And...and..." said the rainbow maned horse thing.

"Rainbow, before you kill yourself spewing this info at me, take a breather, ok? Just relax. How about this? We'll take a look at this, 'bird' tomorrow, alright?" said the grey horse with the orange mane. There were five more horse thingies. One that was purple and had a purple mane with a pink streak. Another that was orange with a cowboy hat. One that was pink and had a mane that looked like cotton candy. Another one was alabaster and had a mane that looked like it took hours to style. And the final one was a butter-yellow color and had a long pink mane. What shocked Weasel more was the fact that they had different things on their body. Three of them had a horn. Two of them had wings. And the other two had nothing. And they could talk! Weasel was speechless. The only thing Weasel could say was:

"What the fuck?"

Then they all looked at the window.

"WHAT IS THAT! WHY IS IT GLOWING WHITE!?" screamed the rainbow maned Pegasus.

Without thinking, he threw a bolt of energy at them, striking a book and leaving a burn mark, which only lasted for a few seconds.

"GET IT!!!" cried the blue Pegasus.

"Oh shit!" said Weasel.

                                                                          -0-0-0-0-

"SAL! FINN! BILLY! WE'VE BEEN SPOTTED! BACK TO THE PLANE!", was what the seven ponies heard, followed by more voices.

"GOD DAMMIT, WEASEL! COULDN'T KEEP YOURSELF IN CHECK, HUH!?!?" cried one of the ghosts.

"FUCKING HELL, MAN! WHY DIDN'T WE JUST KILL HIM ON THE ROOF?!?!" said another.

"FOR GOD'S SAKE, JUST RUN!!" said the first voice.

The chased them till they were near the Everfree Forest. They all stopped exactly at the edge of the forest.

"COME ON, GIRLS!  WE'RE LOSIN' EM!" screamed Rainbow.

"Wait, I don't think it's a good idea. We don't know what they are anyway." said Twilight.

"I'm agreeing with Twilight, not a good idea." said Echo.

Oh for God's sake, that's not what I told you to say, Echo! Your supposed to say, 'I think we should go in, it might be a good idea.'!

"Well sorry for stating my opinion, Robert! I just wanna protect Twilight, 'kay?!"

""Echo was a point, ya know! We have the free will to say anything!" said Pinkie.

FINE! JUST KEEP THE STORY GOING!

"Alright, alright! Jeez." said Echo. After the five other mares tried to comprehend the random screaming at the sky, they kept moving towards the glowing lights path. After awhile, the stopped at a strange pile of metal that was twisted in many ways. There were four...things sitting around or laying around, and there was a red substance around each thing.

Blood.

Lots and lots of blood.

And yet they were moving around, twitching a lot.

"What the...?" said Rainbow before they heard the voices.

"We lost them. I say we get back in our fucking bodies!"

"Alright. Let's go."

After that statement, each individual spirit floated to a lump and stood there. Then a strange pillar of light shone on each lump and sparks emanated from them. After a few seconds of the glowing lights, each thing gasped really loud.

"God, that keeps getting to me."

"How you feelin' guys?"

"Like I held my breath for 10 years!"

"Damned plane! Damned guard. DAMNED ZOMBIES!" yelled Billy.

"Aw hell! The plane is completely wrecked! There's no way we're going back!" complained Weasel.

"Why do you want to go back Weasel?" asked Finn.

"Cause there are pony type things back there that tried to get us!"

"Only because you got their attention!" said Billy.

"It's not my fault I got bored!"

"Shut up, Weasel!!!" yelled Billy as he picked up Weasel and threw him to bush.

"AAAAHHHH!" exclaimed Weasel.

-THUMP-

"AAAHHH!!" screamed seven voices.

Weasel looked to his right and saw seven pairs of eyes staring at him.

"Uh..."