Just Us Little Ponies

by GrassAndClouds2

Rating: teen
Tags: Raindrops, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Carrot Top, Original Character, Snails, Cheerilee, Adventure
Length: 80095

Raindrops, Carrot Top, and Cheerilee must partner with a government official and an old enemy to get to the bottom of a series of mysterious disappearances in Canterlot.

When Raindrops takes Snails to Canterlot, her only thought is having a fun day with her little brother. Unfortunately, with the arrival of a mysterious force that seems to be abducting ponies out of their homes, the capital of Equestria has become a dangerous place. Cut off from support and unable to return to Ponyville, Raindrops must work with Cheerilee, Carrot Top, a government official, and one of her most hated enemies in order to protect her brother, stop the disappearances and keep the city safe. But they'll have to move fast, because the number of vanished ponies is steadily increasing... and it could soon include the Ponyville visitors as well. Lunaverse story.

Many thanks to my invaluable beta, Talon&Thorn.

Published 2014-04-23 22:40:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-02 19:25:12 UTC

Beautiful Day

Snails grinned as he trotted out into his front yard and took a deep breath of fresh air. It was, he thought, going to be a wonderful morning. This wasn't just because the sun was bright and warm, or because the fluffy clouds in the sky were making all kinds of fun shapes, or even because he could smell the delicious scents of candy and licorice floating over from Bonbon's candy store. No, it was going to be perfect because it was a weekend morning, which meant that it heralded a full day of pure, uninterupted freedom. No class, no tests, no homework. Nothing but bugs.

"Now, remember," said Shutterbug, hurrying after him and energetically ruffling his mane with her hoof. Her wings were busy folding laundry, and Snails was pretty sure that she was also calculating taxes in her head, but Snails was used to his mother's compulsive multitasking by now. "If you need money for breakfast or lunch, drop on by Carousel Boutique, since I'm helping Rarity with some publicity photos today. Oh, and don't spoil your appetite for lunch--you may buy one piece of candy from Bonbon, but no more. And don't--"

"Mom!" Snails groaned, though he threw a big hug around his mother anyway. "I'll be fine! Don't worry! I'm a big colt now!" He focused and telekinetically levitated an apple from the fruit bowl by the front door, knocking it into himself a few times before slipping it into his bag. "See?"

"I know," said Shutterbug. "I just worry sometimes." She returned the hug. "Are you going to have fun with your friend Snips?"

"Oh, no, Snips got in big trouble. He can't go out today." Snails chuckled at the memory.

"Why, what did he do?"

"Well..."

***

"Hey, sis, look!" Apple Bloom hopped from hoof to hoof. "Come in here an' see what Snips an' Ah did!"

"What is it, Sugarcube?" asked the farmer, trotting into her living room.

"Well, Ah thought it'd be nice ta show a little support fer the Farmer's Union's trade booth, so Ah had Snips help make sure Ah looked real supportive!"

Snips, using his magic to hold onto a pair of scissors, nodded his head furiously. "What do you think?"

Applejack stared at Apple Bloom, who now had a ragged 'FU' cut into her coat. "Uh."

"It's the Farmer's Union's initials!" said Snips, as if it was a great revelation. "Isn't it a perfect uniform?"

Applejack looked at her little sister's beaming face. "Uh."

"What's all the commotion?" yelled Granny Smith from an adjoining room. "Plum woke ma right outta ma nap!"

"Granny Smith! Granny Smith! Look at ma!" called Apple Bloom.

Applejack's eyes widened. "Ah don't think that's a good idea, Sugarcube. Ah--"

But then Granny Smith entered the room, and by the time things settled down, Snips had been chased off the property, Apple Bloom had been dunked into a bath of hair-regrowing solution that smelled of prunes, and all three of them were grounded for a very long time.

***

Shutterbug blinked. "All three of them?"

"Uh huh! Snips, Apple Bloom, and Applejack too for letting it happen!" Snails giggled at the thought of an adult being grounded. "And now Apple Bloom looks like a really fluffy pony from all the hair-regrowing stuff. But I think she's supposed to be back to normal in a few days."

"Oh," said Shutterbug. "Well, I'm sorry to hear they were grounded. But I'm sure you can amuse yourself, or play with your other friends."

"Yep! I'm gonna go play 'look at bugs!' Snails nodded his head fervently. "Then later, I'll see if Dinky wants to play 'look at bugs.' And if she doesn't, I'll see if Alula or Firelock or Pipsqueak or Truffle Shuffle wants to play it!" He began to trot out of their yard. "See you later, Mom!"

The young unicorn whistled as he trotted through the town, watching the clouds and wondering if Raindrops, his sister, had sculpted any of the more bug-like ones in order to make Snails smile. After all, he had the greatest big sister in the world, and she loved to do nice things for her little brother. Hey, I know! he thought. Maybe I'll see if I can find some bugs that look like those clouds! Then, if Raindrops really did get some bug clouds for me, I can get her some real bugs! He smiled to himself. I'm sure she'll like that!

When he reached his first hunting ground, the pond, he carefully unpacked his bug-hunting equipment--his safari hat, his Daring Do official spyglasses, his jars, and his syrup solutions that would attract bugs who liked sweet things--and set them up. "Let's see," he said as he spread himself out and began to monitor the ground. "Ooh, a bumblebee!" he said, noticing a black-and-yellow bug buzzing around a big daffodil. "Hi Miss Bee! How are you today?"

The bee gave no response.

Snails chuckled and walked over to the flower. He knew that a lot of ponies were afraid of bees--particularly the ponies who sold flowers in the town square--but he liked them. Not only did they make delicious honey and have awesome stingers, but when he'd had trouble sleeping for a few nights due to a bad cold, his pet bees had taken it upon themselves to buzz at just the right pitch to help him drift off. Twilight had called that a 'white noise' signal when he'd told her about it, though he was pretty sure that it was more of a 'yellow and black noise' (and he'd been surprised that Twilight didn't know what colors bees were). But either way, Snails thought that bees were a good type of critter indeed. "Are you having a good breakfast?"

The bee continued to ignore him.

Kneeling so that his muzzle was brushed up against the flower, Snails called, "Do you want to go for a walk? I can show you around Ponyville, and maybe you'll see some other bees to make friends with! And then I can take you home and you can meet my awesome big sister, and Mom and--"

With a small jolt, the bee finally took off from the flower and settled on Snail's muzzle.

The colt grinned. "Oh boy! What do you want to do first? Hey, have you ever been to Sugar Cube Corner? They have a honeyshake that's--"

The bee stung him.

It wasn't so much the pain as the surprise that knocked him backwards onto his flank. The bee floated up to the level of his eyes, turned sharply enough to be obviously dismissing him, and then buzzed away. Snails stared after it as it went.

Unbidden, thoughts were coming to the forefront of his mind. Just last week, when he'd done very well on a test about farming bugs, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon had cornered him outside the classroom. "I guess it's a good thing you're good with bugs," Diamond Tiara had said, "because it's the only thing you're good at!"

"Yeah!" Silver Spoon had snapped. "You'd better hope that bugs are always nice to you, 'cause if they decide to play with better ponies, you won't be able to do anything. You're so bad with magic your head almost exploded before Trixie taught you how to fix it, and you're not smart or fast or classy or elegant or anything!"

Diamond Tiara had continued, saying, "Ugh, I feel bad for Raindrops. She could have had any brother in the world, but she got a one-trick pony who won't even have that one trick once the bugs around here get some class. Don't you ever feel bad that she's stuck with you?"

Snails had just waved his test paper with the big red 'A' in front of him like a banner, chuckled, and said, "Nope! You're just jealous I beat you on the test. Now, I'm gonna go play with my ants, and I'm gonna tell my sister how awesome I was! Have fun studying for the remedium test next week!"

"Remedial, you featherbrain!" Silver Spoon had snapped. But Snails had already been trotting off, hurrying home to tell all his bug friends how he was really glad they had helped him study because it had clearly paid off so much.

But now he could only bring a hoof to his muzzle in shock. He had known intellectually that some bugs might not like him--even bugs occasionally had very poor taste--but to sting him? Why would a bee do that? He hadn't done anything to it. Maybe it was just a grumpy bee... or maybe it wanted to play with better ponies like Silver Spoon had said. And if the bugs wanted to play with better ponies, then according to Diamond Tiara he wasn't good at anything at all. And if that was true, then it was also true that he was a bad brother. And that meant...

Tail and head drooping, he slowly walked away.

***

"Snails? Are you okay?"

Snails looked up. He had tripped near the edge of town and tumbled into a patch of dirt near a large rock, and after that it had just seemed like too much bother to get up. Instead, he poked his hoof at the dirt and hoped that the stupid day would just end already. "Fine," he grumbled.

He felt somepony picking him up, and then saw the banana-colored face of his sister. "Come on, Snails, I know you better than that." Raindrops carefully wrapped Snails into a big hug. "What's wrong?"

Snails sniffed. "A bee stung me, which means that bugs might not like me anymore. And if bugs don't like me anymore, and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon told me that if bugs don't like me then I'm bad at everything and..."

"Hey!" Raindrops scowled briefly before softening her features. "That's not true. You know that, right? Those two are just jerks."

"Yeah, but... but they said I'm not good at anything. And every foal in town is smarter than me and better than me and worth more than me... and that I'm a terrible brother.."

For a moment, Raindrops looked like she was going to fly to Filthy Rich's house and begin tearing it down brick by brick, and her hooves were making divots in the ground. After a moment, though, she seemed to get herself back under control. "They're idiots. You're the best brother I could hope for. You're kind and you're loving and your wonderful in every way." Raindrops gave Snails another hug. "You're a wonderflu brother, and I love you so much..."

"So... I'm not worthless?" asked Snails.

"Of course not! Everypony has worth."

"Even me?"

"Even--Snails, listen. You know more about bugs and little animals than anypony I know. You've got an encyclopedia up there." She gently poked Snails' head, eliciting a small giggle. "You try everything as hard as you can--you don't get lazy or quit, like a certain pink-coated earth pony who probably has her butler do her homework when she doesn't understand it. You're industrious. You're compassionate. You are a wonderful brother, and don't you let one mean bug--or Diamond Tiara--tell you different."

A smile had crept back onto Snails' face. "Really?"

"Really."

They hugged in silence for a moment, and then Raindrops said, "I have an idea. Cheerilee and Carrot Top are going up to Canterlot today to see the grand opening of the new insectarium. It's supposed to have more bugs per square foot than anywhere else in the nation--and they're all super friendly, so none of them should be mean to you like that bee. Now, Cheerilee and Carrot Top each have an extra invitation they aren't using. Maybe you and I could go with--?"

"The insectarium? Really? Wow!" Snails gasped, then let a grin spread over his face. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were clearly wrong, he told himself; Raindrops loved him, and she was the Element of Honesty and wouldn't love a bad brother, so therefore he was a good brother. He had worth. He wasn't the terrible pony they had said he was. "Can we really go?"

"You bet!"

"YAY!" Snails hugged Raindrops. "You're the best big sister ever."

"And you're the best little brother ever."

After a long embrace, Snails got onto Raindrops' back. She began flying them to the library, telling Snails that she had made plans to meet Cheerilee and Carrot Top there before going to the train station. "We'll just pick them up," said Raindrops. "And then we'll go, okay?"

"Uh-huh. Oh, and Raindrops?" asked Snails.

"What?"

"Are there adults like Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon?"

"A few. But don't worry." Raindrops was silent for a moment. "When you grow up, you'll learn better ways of dealing with ponies who want to bully you and make you feel small."

***

Baroun Mounty Max of Nulpar looked at Archduke Bobbing Fisher and wished he knew a better way of dealing with a pony who made him feel small.

They were at an early morning meeting of the Canterlot Security Ministry, a group of nobles and officials who dealt with the internal security of Canterlot itself. These nobles included Archduke Fisher, the committee chair, because by statute the Minister of War ran this particular Ministry. They included Vicereine Wallflower, because she governed the province of Canterlot. They included Viscount Silver Shackles, because his duties included overseeing the Police and Jail Committees of the Court. And they included Baron Mounty Max, albeit for no reason that he had been able to discover.

Max had tried, with the same amount of determination and fervor that he tried everything else. Ever since the Grand Galloping Gala, he had been working very hard to accomplish more in the Court. He had gotten himself onto a few small committees, none glamorous, but all engaged in important work. He had shut himself up in the library for many deeply boring hours, studying the varied issues that the governing officials would be considering in the coming months. He had even begun drafting bills, forcing himself to learn the obscure language of the laws of the Court, and submitting himself to repeated embarassment when Duchess Fragrant Posey gently pointed out that he had gotten a clause wrong and some other pony could use his error to twist the bill into something unrecognizable. But he kept going, he persevered, and by the end of his first year in the Court, he had gotten three bills to the floor. The first was rejected, the second was tabled, but the third--an omnibus bill providing funds for building roads and rail lines in rural provinces such as Nulpar--had passed. It was unusual for a first-year noble to get anything to the floor, much yet actually pass something, but he had done it. Because he was Mounty Max, and however new, or inexperienced, or naive he was, he did not give up.

He had applied that same attitude to his efforts to learn why he bad been placed on the Canterlot Security Ministry, but to no avail; all his efforts could find no purchase against the solid wall of the Night Court bureaucracy. It was as if he was trying to climb a perfectly smooth marble surface. He knew that he had not asked to be on the Ministry, that nobody on the Ministry really desired him to be on the Ministry, that it violated tradition for any noble with less than five years of experience to be on that Ministry, and that Archduke Fisher positively wished to throw him off the Ministry (and possibly the Canterhorn; they didn't get along). And yet there he was. Max's only remaining theories were that Luna had added him of Her own accord, that a clerk had added him by mistake, or that the Ministry had become sentient and added him itself. He wasn't sure which one was more ominous.

But be that as it may, he was on the Ministry, and he was determined to do a good job... even if Fisher kept hinting, or outright stating, that he needn't be so concerned about attendance. So he said, in response to Fisher's latest jab, "Don't worry. I don't mind being woken up for something important." He sat at his seat, the lowest at the table. "I don't need to go back to bed."

Fisher muttered something inarticulate, then looked around the room. The Ministry met in a nice room, one of the large meeting halls near the center of the castle. There were statues of famous soldiers and warriors, and a big mural of questionable accuracy depicting Equestria's founders putting a stake through a windigo's heart. Now, Fisher moved towards one of the statues--one depicting an ancestor of his, Max noted--and began. "Unfortunately, we must deal with an emergency today. Viscount Shackles?"

Shackles, an earth pony with a green coat and a blue mane, nodded. "Thirty minutes ago," he drawled in a slow, tranquil voice, "We received notice of a break-out at Foalsome prison. Over a dozen prisoners escaped."

"Anypony dangerous?" asked Captain Shining Armor, head of the Royal Guard of Canterlot.

"About half of them were in prison for nonviolent crimes--fraud, forgery, theft. But the rest could be threats. In particular--"

Fisher cut him off. "Three are particularly dangerous. First: Manetelli Luca, boss of the Fillydelphia mafia. He ran a major salt lick ring; his competitors tended to wind up in hospitals. Second, Mareio Luca, Manetelli's brother and subordinate. Manetelli wasn't afraid to get his hooves dirty, but when he could help it, he had his brother do his dirty work for him. And lastly, Soleil Superior." He was silent for a moment. "Sun cultist."

"Any connection between the cultist, the mafia, and the others?" asked a tall unicorn with a purple coat, black mane, and unusually long and pointy horn. This was Volk, Fisher's bodyguard, if Max remembered correctly. Posey had said that Volk had the bearing of a street gangster, and Max found himself in agreement--the unicorn always looked like he was spoiling for a fight. "If they teamed up, we could have a real tough fight on our hooves." Volk grinned. "Could get messy."

"Not that we can find, but it's possible they might have aligned to get out of the prison," said Shackles. "Doubt they'll stick together long enough to get out of town, but it's possible."

Fisher turned his gaze to the rest of them. "I do not need to remind you how dangerous they are. A mafia group attempted to abduct the Element of Kindness's daughter last year. The Sun Cult was responsible for attacking three of our fortified outposts on the northern border, and managed to burn one of them down. These ponies must be found and arrested."

Max had an idea. "I--"

"So," interrupted Fisher. "I recommend that we mobilize all available police and sweep the city. We'll focus on the mafia ponies first, since they're the most likely to have dangerous underlings in the vicinity. Additionally, since at least one of the criminals is allied with the Tyrant Sun, I recommend that the Royal Guard assist with the search. Many of them have been trained to deal with the Cultists, and besides, the city is large enough that the police will need as much ponypower as they can get to track these criminals down before they escape Canterlot."

Viscount Shackles shrugged. "Speaking on behalf of the civilian police force, I don't foresee any objections."

"Well..." Captain Armor tilted his head and was silent for a long moment. "Usually that requires declaring martial law, and I don't really think the situation calls for it."

I have--" began Max.

Fisher didn't seem to notice. "Canterlot is big, Captain Armor. It would be an incalculable loss if the Sun Cultist were to escape the city--especially with actionable intelligence for the Tyrant Sun." Fisher's eyes glinted like steel. "I'm not declaring martial law. Nopony is shutting down transportation to and from the city or mandating that ponies stay indoors. I am simply asking that the Guards partner with the police, so that their investigation is not hampered by a lack of ponypower."

"I still think Princess Luna should have a chance to weigh in on it."

"And we can discuss it with her when she returns from Pferdreich tonight. However, we obviously cannot wait until then."

"That's true." Armor nodded slowly. "If you think it's really necessary, I'm okay with it for now--provided this remains a police operation. We're not declaring martial law. We're just temporarily deputizing the Guards so the police can cover more ground in less time. And we'll notify the princess as soon as she returns."

Fisher nodded. "Of course. As a second point, I have several members of my private security force here in the city guarding my various properties; I'd like to deputize them as well to help ferret out Soleil--they're trained to deal with the Sun Cult."

"Sounds good to me, " said Shackles, and Armor nodded his head as well.

Max tried again. "I--"

"Very well," said Fisher. "Now, as for specific tasks--I will remain in the Castle and coordinate the search. Viscount Shackles, you brief the police on what the escapees look like and anything else you know about them. Captain Armor, get your Guards ready; Volk, prepare Factory Security to assist them. Viscount Fudge Ripple..."

He continued through everypony there, except for Max. "I think that's everything," he said at the end. "Let's get about it." The ponies rose, and Fisher himself trotted for the nearest door.

Max hurried to catch Fisher before the Rushian escaped. "Excuse me," he said. "Archduke," he began. "I also have some ideas. In particular, we could try using Diamond Dogs to follow the scent of--

Fisher turned. "Baron Max. I apologize for the messenger's error." His horn glowed and some papers on the table began to gather themselves. "He should have told you that your presence was not required for this meeting."

"But I think--"

A frown flashed over Fisher's face for a moment. "Baron," he said. "You have no experience with the military or with security forces. With all appropriate respect, your thoughts are not required here."

"When we had graffiti vandals in Stalzburg, I helped catch them." Max frowned. "And I'm learning. I've been reading--"

"That is not the same thing." Fisher shut his eyes for a moment. "Your zeal is appreciated, but this is not the sort of agency for a newcomer to the Court to learn what he is doing. This Council matters, Max. Lives are at stake. If we make a mistake, the escaped criminals could flee the city. They could take hostages. That cultist could burn down the castle. We do not have the luxury of indulging inexperience. Go learn on the other councils."

"All the councils are important," objected Max. "Pony lives depend on all of them. And I'm not that new anymore. I've been here for a year--"

Fisher shook his head. "Baron Max. With respect to your heroics, there are many ponies on this Council who know what needs to be done to keep this city safe. You are not one of them." He began to trot out the door. "Go back to your studies, Baron. Or the Duchess of Cloudsdale, if you require coddling. Leave the War and security to those of us who know what has to be done, and who know how to do it."

Max could only stare as Fisher left. He knew that Fisher hated him--Max had flatly refused to allow Fisher to turn his portion of the border, which Fisher claimed was a weak spot in Equestrian defenses, into a long series of fences and armed checkpoints, unless the full Court voted on the issue. Fisher had carried a grudge ever since. But it still rankled him to have to deal with it.

But what could he do? Complain to Fragrant? Whine to Luna that Bobbing Fisher was being mean? What would that accomplish? Besides, they were probably both asleep now anyway, and the threat of the criminals was imminent. That was no good.

He wanted to just go back to bed. But he was Mounty Max of Nulpar, and he didn't give up. There was a problem, and when he found a problem he would move stars and seas to solve it. So instead he turned on his hoof and went for the castle exit, deciding to talk to somepony who could give him a bit of advice.

***

Raindrops knocked on the library door. "Hello? Cheerilee, we--"

The door burst open and a scraggly-looking Twilight poked her head out. "Raindrops! Thank the Moon you're here. I really need your help." Her horn glowed and she dragged Raindrops, as well as a giggling Snails, into the library. Depositing them in front of a massive pile of clothes, books, snacks, and maps, she shoved a saddlebag into Raindrops' hooves. "I need to get all these things into this bag!" She paused. "You might need to squish them a little."

Raindrops let the laughing Snails down off her back so he could run around in the library. "Packing?" she asked, looking at the pile of gear. "I thought you were under house arrest."

"I am, but I've been here for six months and I've shown really good behavior, so they're letting me go back to see my family for a few days!" Twilight grinned. "I'll get to see Mom and Dad and my BBFFF..."

"BBFFF?"

"Big Brother, Fantastic Friends Forever." She paused. "I mean, he used to be Big Brother, Best Friends Forever but then I realized that I might technically make another, better friend while I was in Ponyville, and then calling him my BBBFF would be technically inaccurate and so I thought of calling him my BBCQD, but that was right out, and..."

"Easy, Twilight." Cheerilee walked down the stairs with a single closed saddlebag. "You don't need to stress. You're going home for a few days, and I'm sure you'll have lots of fun with your family." She smiled. "There's nothing to worry about."

Raindrops frowned. "You've only been here six months. Is it normal for them to give you a trip home so soon?"

"No, but maybe they were really impressed by my behavior or something. I mean, I helped with Winter Wrap Up, Running of the Leaves, I put out the fire at the Ingathering... and I've made so many friends!" Twilight grinned. "Just yesterday, Lily Vale was in here to look up a book on flowers, and we talked for hours about fractals in nature! Did you know that there's an entire family of roses whose petals arrange in a perfect fractal pattern?"

Raindrops blinked. "...sure?"

Twilight gave a small 'squee' of happiness. "I didn't, but she taught it to me and now she's coming by next week with tea!" She levitated a few books on 'having the perfect tea party' to another stack. "Friendship is awesome!"

Raindrops couldn't help but laugh; her anger at Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon almost forgotten. "I'm sure you'll have fun," she said.

"If I may ask," said Cheerilee, "Why are you packing so much?"

"I know it might look silly, but I'm so nervous! I haven't seen my family since my trial, and I want everything to go perfectly! I don't want anything to go wrong!" Twilight began grabbing at items from the pile near Raindrops. "What if it rains? Or sleets? What if there's a grocer strike and we can't get food? What if--"

Cheerilee put a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "You'll be fine, Twilight. I promise."

The mage took a few deep breaths. "Sorry. I know I'm freaking out right now..."

"It's fine," said Raindrops. "I'd probably be nervous too."

"It's just... I don't want to embarass my family anymore."

"And you won't," said Cheerilee. "You're a good pony. You're making amends for your mistakes. You'll be fine."

Twilight smiled. "You two are great friends."

"We try," said Raindrops. "I--"

"Agh!" The three looked up to see Snails running away from a large rolling globe that had fallen from a shelf and was chasing him down. "Help! It's trying to crush me!"

Twilight levitated Snails up and stopped the globe with a hoof. "Careful, Snails!"

"Thanks, Miss Twilight!" Snails grinned. "You're awesome!"

The mage laughed. "I am?"

"Yeah! Everypony thinks so!"

"Everypony around here, anyways." Twilight lowered Snails back onto Raindrops' back. "Thanks."

"Around here? Is anypony giving you trouble?" asked Raindrops.

"Not much. I'm still getting a few letters from the upper crust in Canterlot. Most of them just say they'll help 'rehabilitate my image' in exchange for getting my dad to give them political favors. Most of the rest just tell me how I should be ashamed of myself... you know, so if I do violate my probation and get sent to jail, they can tell everypony they saw it coming. And then there's the weird ones." She floated a letter over to the knights. "Look at this."

Raindrops took it. "Dear Twilight. I can't believe the shame and dishonor you brought upon your famly name. Captain Shiny Armor is a strong, handsome, galliant stallion who is too good to be associated with the likes of you. As his future wife, I say..." She paused. "Future wife?"

"I know, right? As if that were possible." Twilight rolled her eyes.

"Your brother's not the dating type?" asked Cheerilee.

"Uh. Yes. That's how I know. I never put a geas on him when I was eight compelling him to tell me if he fell in love." Twilight blinked a few times. "Anyways. I really don't get that much hate mail, and my friendships in Ponyville more than make up for it. You ponies have been some of the most wonderful I've ever met."

"We try," said Cheerilee. "Incidentally, who sent that letter? I'm going to Canterlot on the next train. If you want, we could talk to her for you. We're Knights; if we tell her what you're really like, I'm sure she'll believe us."

Twilight blinked. "There's no need for that, really. I'm fine. If I get a real threat, I'll report it to the appropriate official in Canterlot--"

"The government's not always the most efficient agency in Equestria," said Cheerilee. "As any resident of Ponyville could tell you. And you shouldn't be getting hate mail. If you are, I'm sure myself and the other knights can take care of it right away."

Twilight thought for a moment, then shook her head. "I'd rather you didn't. I'm fine, and honestly, I've been having so much fun in Ponyville I barely ever think about letters like this anymore." Her horn flashed and the letter burst into flame and burned up, eliciting a gasp from Raindrops and applause from Snails. "Have fun seeing your old friend in Canterlot. I'll have fun with my family."

"Great," said Raindrops. "Now--Cheerilee, okay if we head to the insectarium with you and Carrot Top? Snails wants to see the--"

"INSECTARIUM!" cheered Snails. "With all kinds of bug buddies!" He beamed. "I called them buggies!"

"Sounds great!" said Cheerilee. "Carrot Top's coming with too--she's been waiting at the train station for over an hour, she really wants to see the Farming Bugs they're showcasing there. We could spend the day together!" She chuckled. "It'll be fun to spend some time in the city with a bunch of our friends!"

Snails grinned. "Carrot Top's fun too!" he announced. "She knows all the best bugs around here, and she even asked me to help her trap some rare ants in the Everfree!" He began to bounce up and down on Raindrops' back. "This is going to be a blast! Yay!"

"Have fun!" said Twilight as the others began to leave.

"We will!" called Snails as they left. "This is going to be the best day of my life!"

***

"This will be the worst day of your life."

Greengrass blinked as he looked at the aged equine behind the counter. "I'm sorry?"

"I said, today will--"

"No, no, I heard that part. Rather..." Greengrass paused. "This is Climbing Ivy's Garden Supplies Emporium, yes?" He gestured at the plants and gardening tools arrayed on shelves. "Not a purveyor of arcane fortunes?"

"Oh, yes. But Climbing is on vacation today. I'm her cousin, Creeping Ivy." The equine rose to her hooves, but wrapped in a cloak as she was, Greengrass couldn't even tell if she was a pony, donkey, elk, or zebra. He saw hooves, eyes, and not much else. "I'm a professional fortune teller, but I also run the store when my sister is away."

"I see." Greengrass looked at the dilapadated storefront and decided that it was no real surprise why the store, despite having been described in a trade journal as being one of the best places in the city to get supplies for rare and exotic plants, wasn't terribly popular. "Well, in the interests of running the store, perhaps you could show me to some fertilizer for a few gloriosa that I recently acquired. They're a--"

"I know what they are," said Creeping Ivy. "Right this way, sir."

She led him through a maze of dimly lit shelves containing a variety of plants, some of which Greengrass knew through his hobby, and some of which were totally foreign to him. Many looked like strange crossbreeds of flowers that no one would ever think to put together. One smelled like a perfume Luna had worn at a few formal ceremonies. Another smelled like a rotting corpse. But they finally reach an aisle with bags of fertilizer, and Ivy carefully put one onto Greengrass's back. "Here you go, sir. Perfect for gloriosa. Are you a gardener, by chance?"

"More of a hobbyist, really," he said. "I have my own plot in the city."

"A hobbyist?" murmured Creeping Ivy as she began to lead him back to the front of the store. "May I ask your profession?"

"I am a Duke in the Night Court," said Greengrass. It had hurt, in the immediate weeks after the Gala, when he had lost his political influence, to think that he had lost his chance to guide and someday rule the nation... but he had grown inured to it, and could speak of it without even frowning now. After all, no serious player of games would waste time turning over losses in his head when he could get right back into it. Rather her than cry about his loss of influence in the Court, he would just focus on making his remaining gardens as beautiful as they could be... whether the garden in question was the flower plots under the abandoned warehouse on the city's lowest levels, or the nation itself. Besides, any good Game has ways for defeated players to return. I will abide. I'll get back in there someday. "Why?"

"You seem like a pony who is focused on a specific purpose. I was just interested as to what that purpose was."

Greengrass enjoyed manipulating other ponies by psychoanalyzing them--his special talent was even searching out their weaknesses--but he didn't much appreciate the standard cold-reading nonsense he'd heard from numerous phony psychics. If somepony would try to manipulate him, they could at least put some effort into it. "Well, I think that's all I want here. How much--"

"Would you like a fortune?" asked Ivy. They reached the counter and she began ringing up the purchase. "An ominous presence trails you. I can help you prepare for the day to come."

"No thank you."

For the first time, an expression flashed over Ivy's face. It was a good approximation of concern, Greengrass noted; if she wasn't clearly trying to sell him a useless fortune, he might even have been fooled. "I would urge you to reconsider, sir," she said.

"Really, with how expensive the fertilizer is, I just haven't the money," lied Greengrass.

Ivy hesitated for a few moments, then said, "Then... I will do it for free. I would be ashamed if I let you walk into the jaws of fate without even a warning, sir."

Okay, this is a better grift, thought Greengrass. First one's free, I suppose. And I'm actually curious to see where this goes, so... "Very well. What is my fortune?"

Ivy gestured for him to place a hoof on the counter, then carefully began studying it. "Oh my," she whispered. "I see doom. Doom and misery and unhappiness. And..." She paused. "Despair. There is despair in your future, sir."

"I suppose that it can be averted with a certain rare charm which you, fortitiously, are willing to sell to me?"

The fortune teller shook her head. "Oh, no sir. I have no magic powerful enough to avert this despair. I am very sorry to give you this news, sir."

Greengrass paused, trying to work out the scam. "As it happens, I've had some fairly bad days. I'm a bit skeptical that this could be the worst day of my life, as you called it when I entered."

"Let me see, then." Ivy resumed examining Greengrass's hoof. After a few minutes, she nodded. "My mistake, sir. I apologize. This will not be the worst day of your life."

"I should hope--"

"This will be," And when the fortune teller looked into Greengrass's eyes, the noble had the distinct feeling that she wasn't lying or putting him on in the slightest, "The worst day of your life so far."

***

My little pony, My little pony
Ahh ahh ahh ahhh...
My little pony –
Friendship never meant that much to me
My little pony –
But you're all here and now I can see
Stormy weather; Lots to share
A musical bond; With love and care
Teaching laughter; It’s an easy feat,
And magic makes it all complete!
You have my little ponies –
How’d I ever make so many true friends?

Author's Note

I bet you're all wondering how I'm going to tie these plotlines together. Could it possibly be that Snails is really working for the Fillydelphia mafia and plans to lure Twilight into Greengrass's secret garden in order to make her teleport the mafia ponies to safety in exchange for a bunch of bugs and an ice cream cone?

Probably not. But it could be!

Archduke Fisher: still kind of a jerk.

Oh, Twilight. You and your geas spells. (I'm guessing that the spell didn't work, since it might have triggered on Cadance now. It was probably just Twilight being a silly child and making up some magic words along the lines of "Bippity Boo! You have to tell me if you ever fall in love, Big Brohter!")

Creeping Ivy was a blast to write. I didn't even think of her character during the outlining phase; she just showed up during the draft process and insisted on entering the story. Hopefully that was for the best. She was going to be a zebra initially, but I can't rhyme. :-) So now her species is unspecified.

And yes, that last line is a Simpsons Movie reference. Because I like that movie. :-)

Unwarranted Comments

"Hey Snails, you can open your eyes now!" Raindrops' voice was unusually bright and cheerful, especially given that there wasn't even the slightest chance of rain that day. "We're here!"

Snails, who had ridden on his sister's back ever since getting off the train, took his forehooves off his eyes and looked up. In front of them was a big, colorful building that was flanked by statues of bees, ants, grasshoppers, and venomous widow-maker spiders. "YAY!" he screamed, flinging his hooves around Raindrops' neck. "The insectarium! It's like a dream come true!"

"Now remember, the insectarium has three rules," said Cheerilee. "Don't hurt the bugs, learn a lot, and HAVE FUN!"

Carrot Top, who had indeed joined the group back at the Ponyville train station, laughed. "Also, Snails, I'll expect you to find a few good bugs I could use in my carrot garden, okay? Think you can do that for me?"

Snails saluted. "I won't let you down!" he promised. "I'll find the best bugs in all Equestria for you!"

"That's my little brother." Raindrops gave Snails another hug. "Let's go get you a ticket, okay?"

It only took a few minutes for the four of them to enter the building, at which point Snails' mouth dropped. There were bug exhibits everywhere. Massive mechanical spiders and crickets waved their legs, controlled by enchantments that Snails vowed to learn someday. Docents were everywhere, showing foals bugs and even letting them touch some of the specimins. The cafeteria promised all kinds of bug-themed snacks, from the 'Ladybug's Lettuce Wrap' to the 'Katydid's Carrot Sandwich.' And in the back there was a bright red door, with the words 'Bug Playpen--Foals Only!' on the outside, and a mob of foals trying to push through it.

"Raindrops! Can I go into the playpen?" asked Snails. "Please please please?"

"Sure--"

"Horray!" Snails gave his big sister one last hug. "I love you," he said. "And you love me." He blinked. "I'm a good little brother, aren't I?"

"Course you are. You're the best little brother I could hope for." Raindrops patted him on the head. "Now, go have fun--and I don't want you to come back until even you are all bugged-out.

Snails grinned, then scampered off.

Cheerilee smiled as the colt ran into the playpen area. "Your brother is one of my most excitable students, Raindrops. It's a joy to have such energy in class."

Raindrops laughed. "I should tell you sometime about the bug amusement park he built in the backyard. He's a good foal."

"All foals are good," said Cheerilee.

"Well... there's many good foals. And then there's Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon." Raindrops paused. "I hope you'll talk to them."

"I--"

"Let me rephrase: you're going to talk to them." Raindrops' eyes suddenly flashed. "Those two brats--"

"I will, don't worry." Cheerilee held up a hoof as if to soothe Raindrops. "I already drafted the next parent-teacher notice on the train here."

"Good. Snails deserves better than to be bullied by those two everyday." Raindrops took a deep breath, making herself calm down. "It's not right."

"I agree." Cheerilee sighed. "I'll try again to... show them the error of their ways. In as much detail as necessary." She paused. "If it makes you feel better, Snails shouldn't have to deal with this for too much longer. Foals do tend to mature with time."

"And in the meantime?" asked Carrot Top.

Cheerilee gave a thin smile. "Detention and homework--and plenty of both."

The three laughed merrily.

After a few moments, Cheerilee glanced at the sun. "I should head over to the Educator's Workshop. The insectarium staff will be listing all the resources they have to help us teach foals about bugs. I'm hoping that 'field trips' are one of them. I think it could be really educational to take the foals here for a day, provided they don't all get lost again."

"Yes, preventing that would be nice," said Carrot Top as Raindrops laughed. "I'll be at the exhibits on farming bugs. See if there's anything new the Farmer's Union should know about."

Cheerilee grinned. "That's a wonderful idea, Carrot Top. See? We all know you've got good business sense."

The carrot farmer blushed. "It was Green Grape's idea."

After a short pause, Cheerilee stammered an apology, but Carrot Top smiled. "It's okay. My credentials as a Knight are getting me a behind-the-scenes tour anyways. Red Onion's convinced they're breeding super bees that produce twice as much honey as other hives, so I guess I'll find out if it's true... and if it is, the Farmer's Union might get first dibs."

"You'll be here all day?" Raindrops asked.

Carrot Top nodded, but Cheerilee shook her head. "The workshop breaks for lunch, and I'm meeting an old friend at The Yummy Flower. Feel free to come by! Duty would love to meet you."

"Duty?" asked Carrot Top. "Who's she?"

"Duty Enpay. I knew her in my youth. She ran a little 'import-export business' in Canterlot; we worked together a few times and became friends."

Something about the way Cheerilee had stressed the words 'import-export' struck Raindrops as odd. "An import-export business, huh?"

"Sure. For instance, let's say you wanted a fine Pferdreich scarf for your special somepony, and the imports were closed because the Equestrian diplomat was overheard saying that Pferdreich President's mane was ugly, and all trade shut down for a week... she had you covered." Cheerilee giggled. "We certainly got into some hijinks..."

Carrot Top blinked. "You're having lunch with a criminal?"

"Well, she's gone straight now. And trust me, she's a great pony. You'll love her if you meet her."

Raindrops opened her mouth to make a quip, but suddenly she found herself thinking of something else.

***

"This is gonna be so awesome!" said Snails as he dragged out a box full of dusty comic books. "My new terrarium will be the biggest ever!"

Raindrops couldn't quite hide her grin. Snails had worked on a bug terrarium for over a month, carefully turning an old fish tank into the perfect bug habitat. "Where will you put it?"

"Right here!" Snails finished moving the comics into the center of the room, then dragged the terrarium from the door to the spot where the comics had been. "It's too bad I don't have room for these comics, but bugs are much more awesome. They play with you, and they're good to cuddle with on rainy days."

"What'll you do with the comics?"

"I asked Miss Cheerilee for advice, and she said that if I don't have room for them anymore and don't read them anyways, it might be nice to give them to the other colts and fillies so they can have fun with them too! And I counted, and I have just enough so everypony gets one."

"Everypony?" asked Raindrops as Snails began to drag the comics downstairs.

"Uh-huh! Everypony! That way everypony can know how awesome Captain Horseshoe is!"

Raindrops didn't give the issue any more thought until later that night, when they were eating dinner at home. Noting Snails' happy smile, Raindrops asked, "How'd the comic giveaway go?"

"Oh, it was really fun! Almost everypony liked them."

"Almost?"

"Well..." Snails' smile slipped for a moment. "Diamond Tiara called me a dork and threw hers in a mud puddle." He was quiet for a moment. "But the rest of the foals really liked them! Snips was following me around all day thanking me! And..."

For a moment, Raindrops could only think of Diamond Tiara, the arrogant filly who had once again hurt Snails when all he was trying to do was be nice to her despite all of her preceding cruelties. But then Snails began to levitate the mustard towards himself, and Shutterbug raced to help before he spattered them all with liquid condiments, and Raindrops let the thought sink to the back of her mind.

***

Raindrops didn't understand exactly what had brought the memory to mind. She just shook her head and told herself that if Cheerilee was vouching for Duty Enpay, that was enough. "I'd love to meet her," she said. "Any friend of yours is a friend of ours."

"Wonderful!" said Cheerilee. "This will be so much fun! I'll make sure she tells all the awesome stories. Especially the one where our wagon broke down at the Griffin Kingdom/Equestrian border, with the local warlord right on our tails, and all we had to defend ourselves with was a dozen kegs of cider." She grinned. "Who knew Lord Beakyclaw could drink so much? And we should tell her our stories too, like when you and your martial arts teacher got jumped by those stallions from a rival martial arts school."

"That wasn't much of a story. We just kicked their flanks," said Raindrops.

Carrot Top opened her mouth, closed it, and then said, "I guess I could talk about farming or something..." For a moment, she looked troubled.

Raindrops frowned. "Are you okay?"

"Me? I'm fine," said Carrot Top. "Don't worry about me. Anyways, I've got to go to the Farming Bugs wing. See you later!"

She cantered off. A moment later, Cheerilee left as well, and Raindrops settled in to wait for Snails.

***

Max wrinkled his nose as he climbed up the stairs leading to the garret apartment. He had never been to this part of town, and he doubted he would be back.The buildings were old and rusty, and the paths were more trash-strewn than the roads up by the castle. It wasn't quite a slum, but it wasn't anywhere any tourist would ever willingly go either. He wondered again whether he should just go home. But he hated to give up, and so after a moment, he made himself keep climbing the stairs.

He had gone to the Jasmine Teahouse, which he had first visited during that mess with the Sun Cult six months ago, and which he still tried to patronize at least once every two weeks. It was oddly peaceful and tranquil, a nice respite from the constant political scrambling of the Court, and even though Max was the youngest customer by thirty years, he found it pleasant. He had entered and ordered a cup of tea from the aged proprietor Wolfgang, as usual--that Diamond Dog could brew a mean cup of tea--and sat on a cushion by the old hippogriff and older elk that were always in the middle of a game of chess. He'd then waited for a particular pony that he wanted to meet, one that was often up during the day and was willing to give him advice and critique (and the occasional bonk over the head with a cane).

But he hadn't been able to wait for long. Wolfgang had looked up from the coffee pot he was working on and called out, "Anybody seen Fetlockson today?"

"Nope," the elk had said, moving a chess piece. "Isn't he here yet?"

Wolfgang had shaken his head slowly. "Hasn't been in all morning. That's not like him. He's here every day, rain or shine..."

Max had looked out the window. It was still a beautiful day, and he couldn't see any weather-related reasons why somepony wouldn't make their usual appointment at the teahouse. "Maybe he's ill?"

"Never knew Fetlockson to be ill," an ancient griffin had said.

The members of the teahouse had tossed out many theories, none of which Wolfgang seemed to find persuasive. Finally, he had sighed. "Hey, Max. Can you do me a favor? I've got a bad feeling about this."

Max had risen to his hooves. Wolfgang had helped him save several lives a few months ago, during the Sun Cult affair, and Max knew that the old Diamond Dog was a lot more perceptive than most ponies gave him credit for. "What is it?"

"Can you check on Fetlockson? He's come in every day for the past five years--thunderstorms, blizzards, even holidays. I'm worried he's hurt."

"Maybe he died," the hippogriff had said, with the air of someone who knew that death was very near for all of them and had long since made her peace with the matter.

"Maybe so," Wolfgang had agreed. "But I'd like to know for sure. You're not doing anything else that's more important, are you, Max? Could you look in on him?"

And so Max had found himself in an obscure neighborhood approaching an old apartment. On one hoof, he thought, it was nice to do something directly for a change--take a step to solve a problem, rather than writing a bill that might, in five months, set other actions in motion that might one day accomplish something, But at the same time... he was a noble of the Court. He wanted to be doing important things, things that helped ponies. And now he couldn't, because Fisher thought he was useless.

He wasn't mad that he was literally stuck looking for a senior citizen who had probably just forgotten to get tea that day. He was frustrated that it was literally the most important thing he could be doing at the moment.

He sighed and put a hoof on the stairwell railing to steady himself. Yes, he was frustrated by his work sometimes--the arcane procedures that were needed just to pass a simple transportation funding bill were enough to make him wish he was trapped on a mountain during a blizzard instead. Yes, he'd rather be helping to build a road again--or at least writing bills to fund roads to towns that needed them. He was finally starting to have an impact, after having spent so much time learning from Posey and his other teachers, and even if it wasn't the same as building something with his own hooves, he'd rather have that kind of effect on the nation's ponies than none at all. But if he couldn't serve the government at the moment, because Fisher wouldn't let him contribute to the latest crisis, then he could at least see if this one pony was in trouble. After all, he served the citizens of the nation, and this citizen might need him.

Feeling a little better, Max reached the apartment and knocked. "Mr. Fetlockson? Wolfgang sent--"

The door swung open.

Puzzled, Max entered the apartment and looked around. It was small and decorated mostly with pictures of racetracks and the occasional trophy, as if Fetlockson had been a champion runner a long time ago. Max also found a series of yellowed newspaper articles pinned to one wall; they spoke of a famous cat burglar, the Cat-like Colt, who had been active in the city twenty-five years prior. The last article said that the Cat-like Colt had stolen the Canter Trophy, a very prestigious award granted to the top twenty milers in the nation.

Max frowned. Had Fetlockson won the Canter Trophy, only to have it stolen by the burgler? Maybe then he was trying to track down the burgler, had found a lead, and had gone looking for him. But the crime was twenty-five years old; Max couldn't see what kind of lead Fetlockson might have found at this point. Or maybe Fetlockson had been the burgler, chronicling his own career, but then why do anything different now than before? Or maybe he was just an amateur sleuth who liked following up on cold cases. Max didn't know.

What he did know was that Fetlockson wasn't there, and there was no sign of struggle. Max was about to turn around and go tell Wolfgang that he'd had no luck when he saw a table by the bed with a large, ornate trophy--the most ornate in the apartment--and a notepad with writing on it. It had, Max saw, a few names and times listed in rows, as if it were an appointment schedule. One such name, Don Arnaqueur, showed up several times. Listed next to the last time was a price--and a very large one at that. And next to that was a single pair of words: "BITS ONLY".

Max hesitated. This was starting to remind him, again, of his run-in with the Sun Cult six months ago. The cult's plot had been foiled by the thinnest of margins, and Max himself had come out of that one (mostly) unscathed, but not everypony had gotten off so easy. Greengrass, for instance, had not only lost his secretary (and best friend) but had almost been murdered. Max had no desire to get involved in another mess involving criminal elements within the city; getting attacked by a pony the size of a small carriage once was enough for him. Besides, technically, this wasn't even his job. The Guards were the ponies whose duty it was to look into things like this.

But Fetlockson might be in danger--or a danger to others--and Max knew he didn't have enough evidence to go to the Guards. Especially, he thought, not with most of them deployed towards hunting down escaped criminals. If there really was a problem here, Max figured he might be the only one who could do something about it. If he backed out, and a tragedy occurred...

Max shut his eyes for a moment. I'll just go check with Arnaqueur. I can look up his address at the Hall of Records. I'm sure he's just selling Fetlockson some runner memorabilia, or maybe he recovered that Canter Trophy somehow. Fetlockson was probably just so eager to get it that he forgot about his tea and about locking the door. They're probably fine.

He nodded to himself, and then turned and left the apartment.

***

Snails looked at the bugs dancing in front of him and wondered if life could get any better.

There were ladybugs larger than any he could have imagined, and the docents had let them crawl happily over his coat and tickle him silly. There were beatles and ants that danced in neat patterns like they were having a bug party. There were fireflies in the darkened section of the playroom, leaving trails of light in the shapes of flowers and candy and everything Snails liked. There was even a huge beatle, bigger than his biggest pet back home by half, and Snails got to talk to it and play with it and even hug it. Bugs are good, Snails thought. They're good friends.

His earlier sadness was gone, and as he trotted back towards Ladybug Land, he knew that he was smiling so brightly it almost hurt. Despite one bad bee, it had been pretty much a perfect day. I'm not even sure, he thought, If it could possibly get any better! He rounded a corner--

And found himself staring at Diamond Tiara, who appeared to be trying to shield herself from dozens of bugs simultaneously..

They just stared at each other for a moment, Diamond Tiara not even noticing a few bugs sneaking into her mane. Snails broke out of his stupor first. "What are you doing here?" he demanded. "Stop following me!"

"We're not following you!" said Silver Spoon, trotting up behind Diamond Tiara. She looked just as unhappy as her companion. "You're following us!"

"No I'm not! My big sister brought me here! And... hey, wait a minute. Why are you here? You don't like bugs." Snails tilted his head.

Diamond Tiara scowled, then forced a smile onto her face. "Our daddies always come to grand openings. You see, they're very important ponies who are always trying to meet other important ponies! Now they want to import honeybees from here into Ponyville. They let us play here while they went to talk to--"

"Oh, I see!" said Snails. "They dumped you here so they could go do business stuff with the adults!" He smiled, happy to have figured something out. "Ha ha!"

"We weren't dumped anywhere!" snapped Diamond Tiara. "We're supposed to learn about the bees because our daddies will be-- EEK!" A bug had flown near both of them, causing her to jump back at Silver Spoon and knocking them both over.

Snails laughed again. Serves you right for being mean to me after that test! "Well, I'm here because my big sister loves me and thought she'd give me a treat!" he said. "See? I'm totally a good brother."

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!" Snails grinned. "My sister loves me so much that she thinks I'm the best little brother in the world! I bet you two wish you had a big sister as good as mine is."

"As if! Your sister--"

"Thinks I'm such a good brother she took me all the way to Canterlot so I could have fun!" Snails was not usually a malicious foal, but he saw an opportunity to get a little revenge for their earlier insults. "And your dads probably brought you here 'cause they know you don't know anything about bugs and they want to make sure you learn!"

For a moment, Snails thought he saw steam rising from Diamond Tiara's ears. She even raised a hoof as if planning on jumping at him and getting right in his face. But then Silver Spoon put a hoof on her shoulder. "Ignore him, DT. Let's just wait for our daddies. They'll buy us something nice for the ride home."

Unfortunately, Snails could not resist making one parting jab. "Yeah, but they can't buy you the best sister in the world!" He beamed. "Because you can't buy ponies, and anyways I've already got the best sister!"

"Says so," snapped Diamond Tiara. "Raindrops is just some weathermare who--"

Silver Spoon paused, as if thinking something over, and a small smile formed on her face. She put a hoof on Diamond Tiara's shoulder to quiet her, then said, "What do you mean you can't buy ponies? Don't you--oh..." She trailed off, then gave Diamond Tiara a meaningful look. "He doesn't know."

"Know what?" asked Snails. Probably some dumb girly thing.

Silver Spoon waved this off. "In fact... Snails, isn't your birthday soon?"

"Next week, why?" He blinked. "Are you getting me a present?"

"We would. But, see... you won't be around to get it." Silver Spoon sighed. "Snails, do you know what a warranty is?"

The foal frowned. "It's... uh... it's where if you get something and it breaks you can give it back and get a new one, right?"

"Exactly. So if your clothes or saddlebag tore, she could return that too before the warranty ran out?"

Snails blinked. "Yes, but... who cares?"

"Because your warranty is about to run out, Snails!" Silver Spoon spread her hooves wide. "DIdn't anypony tell you where foals come from? It's from the Foal Company. And all foals come with warranties, but they expire on their birthdays, and yours is about to run out. Raindrops is probably here to replace you before she can't trade you back anymore."

Snails blinked. "But... wait. Foals don't come from stores!"

"Oh yeah? Then where do they come from?" challenged Silver Spoon. "Do they grow up from the ground? Do adults pick them from trees? Does Luna craft them from stardust?"

"Uh..." Snails blushed. He didn't know where foals came from, despite his best efforts to get his sister to tell him. Still, the idea that you could get them in a store seemed absurd for some reason. "But when Mrs. Cake got new foals, she didn't go to a store! She went to the hospital!"

"Obviously, the Foal Company has a retail branch in the hospital," said Silver Spoon. "Duh."

They're just lying again! Because they're big meanines! thought Snails. "I don't believe you. Prove it!"

"Really? Look over there!" Silver Spoon pointed out a window at a boutique across the street, where half a dozen foals were dressed in the latest schoolyard fashions and were parading around behind the shop windows. "That store's got a half dozen of the newest, best models right there!"

"Isn't that a clothing store?"

"Since when do clothing stores have live models?" asked Silver Spoon. "Does Rarity? Do any of the Ponyville shops? No, that's a foal store. They sell some of the best foal models in the city."

"Those ones put the old Snails model to shame," added Diamond Tiara. "They're smart, they're fast, they have great special talents like, uh, being awesome or being pretty or being rich..."

"That's stupid!" said Snails. "And--and even if you could replace foals, Raindrops wouldn't! My sister thinks my special talent's fine, and there's nothing she'd want in a brother that I don't have."

"How about wings?" asked Silver Spoon.

Snails blanched. He did know that his parents had been forced to move from Cloudsdale because he, unlike his entire family, was not a pegasus. He knew that Raindrops occasionally said she wanted to visit there. But... "She wouldn't replace me for a foal with wings!"

"How about a handsome, smart foal with wings?" asked Diamond Tiara. "One with a really good special talent, like making money or persuading other ponies to do what they want! You know, a talent worth of the brother of an Element of Harmony. Not 'bugs.'"

"Hey!" Snails told himself that it was lies, just like before, but it was such an unlikely argument that a little part of him thought it might be true. After all, he thought, could they really come up with a lie like that? And hadn't Raindrops joked about Miss Cheerilee's 'expiration date' that one time when she didn't know Snails was listening? Sure, she'd said it was just about Cheerilee trying to find somepony to fall in love with, but what if ponies really did have warranties, and sell-by dates, and everything else? What if his warranty was almost up?

"Your sister brought you here so she could give you back to the manufacturer!" Silver Spoon said. "She probably just wanted to give you one last present before returning you."

"But..." Snails didn't want to believe it. Hadn't Raindrops taken him all the way to Canterlot just so he could have fun? But what if it really was just so she could return him and get a better foal? A pegasus like Beebop, or a really good magician like Dinky, or even a princess like Alula? "She wouldn't... she says everypony has worth. She wouldn't get rid of me." He made himself nod. "So there!"

"Snails, if everypony has worth, then it's not special to have worth, right?" Diamond Tiara's voice was bright and malicious. "If the best she can say of you is that you're like everypony else, then you're not different than anypony else. You're not better than them. But she's a hero, a Knight of the Realm. She probably wants a special brother, one who doesn't just have worth, one who excels..."

Snails was beginning to cry again as the two bullies blasted away at him. "But I'm... I'm..."

"Excuse me?" The foals turned to see a mare adult, a butter-yellow unicorn with a warm smile. "Is there a problem?"

If it hadn't been for the interruption, Snails might have recovered, but being seen at his lowest by a friendly pony--a pony who would probably think he was a dummy, like everypony else--was too much. "No!" he wailed, and then took off at a dead run.

He ran and he ran, blasting out of the rear exit of the playroom and then the back door to the insectarium, and he didn't stop until he'd left the bullies far behind.

He couldn't face anypony at that moment.

***

When Snails came back to himself, he was in an unfamiliar part of the city.

It didn't look like a nice neighborhood. He had gone down the levels of the city whenever he'd had the chance, unknowingly following a steep path that connected the insectarium and other nearby shops with the warehouses on the lowest level of Canterlot, and not he couldn't descend any further or find his way back up. Ponies walked by on occasion, big muscular stallions and mares with a lot of goods to carry and no time for a little foal. There weren't any shops or restaurants where he might stop and get his bearings. There weren't even any Guards he could ask for help.

He sighed, tears falling from his eyes into the dirt. He knew that he shouldn't have run, and that, even if Raindrops hadn't been mad before, she'd be furious now. She'd come all this way so Snails could have fun, and he'd just gotten sad again, and run off to boot. But he hadn't been able to help it. He knew it was stupid, and bad, and everything else, but he'd run anyway. I'm a terrible pony...

A gust of wind blew a notice by him. He caught it with his telekinesis and read. "Warning. Dangerous criminals escaped. Manetelli Luca, Mareio Luca, Sol... uh..." He trailed off, then skipped ahead. "If you see these ponies, contact the Guards."

Oh... now she'll panic even more and think I got abducted by criminals like Dinky was last year. And when she finds out I ran just cause I'm a stupid weak dummy, she'll hate me and want to have me replaced...

Snails recalled how the Cakes had gotten new foals, twins, and the twins had little tags stick out of the backs of their coats when Snails had stopped by to see them. The Cakes had said the tags were for the coat company. But what if they were for the foal company? What if the Cakes had just ordered two foals, and gotten them, and could return them at any time if the foals disappointed them? What if Raindrops did the same?

He knew these thoughts were cruel towards his sister, but that only made him feel even more worthless. So he just slumped down. I don't even know how to get back...

After about five minutes of standing immobile, he noticed a bug near his muzzle. It was a strange bug, one he had read about but hadn't seen. It was as big as two bits laid end to end, and its feet were unusually big and strong. It was a potato bug, he thought. Where did it come from? I didn't think there were any in Equestria. They're a Mild West bug...

"Hi," said Snails. "I'm sorry I can't play with you now. I'm lost, and... could you help me find somewhere safe to go? Please?"

It began walking away. Snails blinked, then began chasing after it. "Hey, wait up!" He didn't know why he should be following this bug, but he didn't have anything else that he could do, and maybe the bug was smarter than him and could figure something out. "Where are we?"

The bug didn't answer. It just kept moving--unusually quickly for a bug.

Snails chased it through the warehouse lanes, steadily moving from the inhabited, active warehouses to a set of blocks in which most of the buildings seemed abandoned. The bug zipped towards one of these buildings, then slipped through a crack under the door and was gone.

"Come back!" Snails climbed through an open window and found himself in an empty hanger-sized room. There was a steep stairwell down, so Snails raced down the stairs, looking for his bug, and...

And found himself in a beautiful garden.

He stared at the impossible sight. There were flowers of every color and type, and tranquil paths winding through them, and even a small pond in the center. Vines climbed the walls towards the ceiling, heavy with grapes that looked and smelled delicious. Bugs--agricultural bugs, ones Snails knew well from his studies--scampered around underhoof and buzzed in the air, pollinating flowers and churning the soil.

"Wow..." breathed Snails.

He found the potato bug, as well as its buddies, quickly. One rose bush along the main path seemed to be having some trouble; a few branches and roses in the middle had died. Snails knew little of gardening but could guess that, if untreated, the dead parts of the plant could kill the remainder. Furthermore, the dead branches and roses were at the very heart of the bush, where nopony could reach without chopping through it and killing the still-living roses on the outside. But potato bugs ate dead plant matter, and Snails saw them racing around on the innermost dead branches, where some gardener had presumably placed them. It was, he realized, a very smart way of helping to get rid of the dead parts of the plant--by having a bunch of bugs eat them--without hurting the rest of it. "Cool!"

"Hmm?" From across the garden, another pony rose up from behind the bush where he'd been working. "Who's there?"

Snails was nervous for a moment, but then he remembered that he knew this pony from another trip to Canterlot.

"Hi Duke Greengrass!"

***

Greengrass looked at Snails, the younger brother of one of the angriest Knights of the Realm. He looked at the tears still glistening on the colt's face. He looked in vain for an adult or some other form of supervision. He looked, in his mind, at images of Raindrops tracking her wandering brother down, assuming Greengrass had abducted him, and kicking him in the face. He thought of his fortune declaring that it was going to be a rather bad day.

But he was Greengrass, Duke of Caneighda, and he was not the kind of pony to let the possibility of a bad day get him down.

So he bowed deeply. "Why, hello Snails!" he said. "Welcome to my humble abode."

Author's Note

Snails, this is why you don't insult bullies. They're better at it than you.

Potato bugs are perhaps better known as Jerusalem crickets, but we don't have a pony Jerusalem, so I went with the California name for them.

Duty Enpay's name refers to DNP, an acronym meaning Duty Not Paid. It's a euphemism for smuggled goods.

We'll learn more about the Sun Cult thing of six months ago later on, don't worry. You didn't miss anything in a prior story or something. (We'll also learn more about how Max winds up in the old guy tea house, although that's probably not as pressing to people). :-)

Disappearing Act

Greengrass trotted after Snails as he walked through the garden. "You have a lot of really awesome bugs," Snails said, craning his long neck down so he could look under a petal at a rare blue ant. "Where did you get them?"

"Oh, hither and yon," said Greengrass. "I have arrangements with companies that collect and breed bugs from various provinces. And of course I picked up a few myself on occasion. Even went to the Everfree Forest one time to collect some rare West Everfree Bumblers."

"Are those them?" Snails pointed to a sleek little bee with rainbow stripes that was zipping between flowers with unparalleled efficiency. "I've been looking for some forever! I heard they can pollinate flowers three times faster than a normal bee, and their honey is sweeter! And they look so cool!"

"Indeed they are!" said Greengrass. "I find that, to make a truly beautiful garden, it's not enough just to have the right flowers or fertilizer. You need to get everything perfect, from the warmth of the light to the bugs in the soil." They reached the pond in the center of the garden, and Greengrass picked a double hoofful of grapes from a small trellis. He offered them to Snails and then gestured for him to sit on a bench. "Now--what brings you here, Snails? Did you just want to discuss bugs? Are you looking for another game of Diplomacy?"

Snails shook his head, seeming to deflate a little as he did so. "No," he said in a sad voice. "I just got lost, and I followed a bug in."

"Lost?" prompted Greengrass, while he began thinking of a way to prevent other ponies from trailing bugs into his garden. I hope my enemies don't know about that one yet.

The foal nodded. "I was really upset 'cause Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon said that I'm going to get traded in for an Alula because my warranty's gonna expire and I'm dumb and ugly and not good at anything and all the new foal models have wings and good talents and are totally awesome, and so I ran away but I got lost, and now Raindrops is probably really mad at me and she'll want to return me even if all she'll get is a crummy gift certificate."

Greengrass had, as a noble, made himself understand the most complicated and arcane pieces of legislation. He had written documents that used every trick of the Equestrian tongue to mean precisely the opposite of what they seemed to say. He was a master at manipulating the most confusing jargon and legalese. And yet even he had to say, "I'm sorry, I don't think I understand. Your... warranty, is expiring?"

Snails repeated his story a few times until Greengrass got the gist of it. When he did, he settled back and gave Snails a sympathetic look. "I see," he said. "It sounds like quite a problem."

"It is!" said Snails, spreading his forehooves wide as he reared back on his hind hooves. "I want to be a good brother. I don't want to get traded in for a new model!" He gulped. "When I got a better butterfly net my mom threw the old one out. I don't wanna get thrown out with the other bad brother! And... I don't want to be a bad brother even if I don't get thrown out!"

Greengrass put a hoof to his chin as if he was seriously considering the problem. He knew that foals liked it when adults treated their problems with the same gravity and concern as they treated their own. Now that he's calmer, I can figure out why he's here, and hopefully I can do it relatively soon. I do have gardening I want to get to, I have errands--why does the train station have to lose my packages on the most inconvenient days?--and more importantly, I don't want Raindrops to show up and think I abducted Snails. Luna would probably exile me for that... or just have Raindrops throw me off the Canterhorn. Now, I can't explain to him that the idea of returning foals is absurd; he's a foal. He thrives on absurdity. But if I go along with it... "Snails," he said. "Something occurs to me. You look a little bit dusty." He tilted his head quizzically. "Did your sister give you a bath before bringing you into town today?"

"No..."

"DId she comb your mane? Style your tail? Shine your hooves?"

"No. Why would she do that?"

Greengrass grinned. "Well, Snails, it seems to me that, if your sister really wanted to trade you in, wouldn't she restore you to original mint condition? She'd want to make you look as good as possible so she could get the best possible replacement. Isn't that right?"

Snails blinked. "Um... I guess so, but..."

"Also, did she bring your baby clothes?"

"No, she didn't bring anything--"

"Why, that's even better! Snails, don't you know that you can't return a foal unless you include the original packaging?" The gardener smiled. "She'd never try to get rid of you without those."

Snails smiled for a moment before pausing. "Yeah, but what if she lost my baby clothes? Then she couldn't bring them with, and, and if she still doesn't want me she might try to get something for me even without my packaging."

"Hmm. Yes, that is a concern, but..." Greengrass flashed an easy smile. "I've got it. Snails, when your sister packed to go today, did she take your original receipt?"

"Receipt?"

"Yes, receipt. Foals are very expensive and are often finicky. No pony would ever order one without hanging on to the receipt in case of manufacturer's defects or other problems. And I'm sure you know that you can't return anything without its receipt."

"That's true..." mused Snails.

"There you go! Clearly, she has no intention of returning you. You have nothing to worry about." He rose back up to his hooves. "Now, if that's all, I can take you back--"

"But..." Snails paused. "I mean... even if she doesn't want to return me right now... aren't I still a bad brother?"

Now it was Greengrass's turn to pause, one eye flicking towards a water clock in the corner of the room as he did so. The foal was more depressed than he thought, and at this rate, would it would probably take at least another hour to work through the foal's troubles and get through to him. But Greengrass didn't have an hour. He had no desire to be blamed by Raindrops for abducting the foal, and the odds of that grew with every moment.

Greengrass knew that other ponies, even other nobles, would make a different choice. Baron Max, for example, would probably clear his schedule and work with Snails until the foal was fully convinced of his own self-worth, whatever the consequences later. That was the kind of pony he was. But Greengrass was not that kind of pony, and no longer even claimed to be. He wouldn't risk looking like he'd once again attacked the Elements just to help out Snails, especially when he had nothing to gain from it. I'm not going to risk getting stung unless I have an actual chance at some honeycomb...

So he once again acted as if giving the question serious thought, and then said, "Well, I don't think that's true. After all, your sister seems to love you very much, and she wouldn't love a bad brother. Why don't we go ask her?"

Snails frowned. "Aw, can't I stay with the bugs a little longer?"

"Sorry, Snails. But I'm very busy today. And besides..." He knelt by Snails as if confiding a secret. "If I keep you here, your sister might think I stole you away. And then she'd come looking for you because she misses you very much. And if she found us, she'd kick with her hoof--" He mimed a kick, "And knock my head right off the Canterhorn. You wouldn't want your friend Greengrass to get his head knocked off the Canterhorn, would you?"

Snails managed a giggle, though much weaker than he usually laughed. "No!"

"Alright then. I'll take you back to the Insectarium and have the docents start looking for your sister, okay?"

Snails nodded. He didn't look happy, exactly, but his more-or-less contentedness would last until Greengrass could return him to his sister or another adult, which was sufficient for his, Greengrass's, purposes. I'll get him to the insectarium and drop him off with a docent, then return here. That's my best option here.

Gesturing for Snails to follow, he headed up and out of his garden.

***

"Hello, Duty! It's me, Blackcherry!" Cheerilee grinned as she knocked on the door of the old house. It was a stately structure in a middle-class part of Canterlot, a nice old house with a fresh coat of white paint and a big tree in the front yard that was perfect for climbing. She smiled to herself, knowing full well what kind of adventures had been prepared for behind those walls, what routes had been planned and what supplies stored up in preparation for another run past the Equestrian or Griffin Kingdom border patrols.

"Yoohoo!" She knocked again. "Duty, open up! It's been ages!" And a smile came to her face unbidden as she thought back to their last adventure...

***

Duty and Cheerilee laughed merrily as they lay amidst the remains of what had once been a Pferdreich Councilor's silver-plated battle-wagon.

"Remind me not to let you handle the diplomacy next time," said Duty, a cream-colored earth pony with a frizzy red mane. Despite her words, there was no malice in her voice. "You just had to challenge the Generalissimo to a cider drinking contest..."

"Oh yeah? Well, you were the one who tried to drag race that elken track squad out of the country!"

"Pshaw. Only cause you ticked off the hippogriff ambassador and we had to beat a fast exit."

"Yeah, cause he gave you guff about your mane. It's too awesome a mane for some stuck-up featherbrain to insult."

The two burst into laughter again as they looked over the quiet field.

"So, any ideas how we're going to get this cider back to Equestria?" asked Cheerilee at last.

Duty reached back into the wreckage and grabbed two bottles of cider. Passing one to Cheerilee, she said, "Well, I know a pony who knows a pony who knows a camel wagoneer...

***

Bringing herself back to the present, Cheerilee realized that she had been waiting for a rather long while. "Duty?" Cheerilee called. "Are you there? I..."

She touched the door, and it swung open.

The teacher froze. Duty always locked up, she knew; it came from long experience with hauling goods one was not supposed to have. Something was definitely wrong.

Glancing around, Cheerilee quickly eased her way into the house and shut the door behind her. A faint stench instantly hit her nose; following it to the kitchen, she saw a jug of milk that, by its smell, had just started to go bad. Duty drank raw, unpasteurized milk, Cheerilee knew, and that kind of milk spoiled very quickly, but it had probably still been out for at least a few hours. Duty was always meticulous. She wouldn't leave milk out to spoil. Why?

Cheerilee quickly searched the house, found nopony, and also noted that nothing seemed to be missing. Jewelry, bankbooks, and valuables were all present in various places. In fact, absolutely nothing was turned over or opened, so it didn't seem like there was even an attempt at a robbery. Besides, she's been out of the smuggling business for ages now. She doesn't have anything really valuable to take except for money, and that's in her bank. So why would anypony attack her? And also... nothing's broken. I know Duty; she was strong--could probably put up a decent fight against Big Mac. If she were attacked, wouldn't there be some kind of a struggle?

Puzzled, she returned to the kitchen. Okay. She took the milk out, and then she was grabbed by somepony--or maybe she left. What if something happened and she just fled? That would explain why nothing had been taken and there were no signs of combat. Unfortunately, though, that raised other questions. Was she afraid of something? So afraid she just bolted?

Cheerilee sat down in one of the kitchen chairs and spoke aloud to herself. "If she did run, where would she go? She wouldn't just leave, because anypony who could trace her here could probably trace her if she went to a train station or a chariot stand. She doesn't have any hideouts in the city, at least that I know of." She thought back to what she knew of Duty's smuggling career. "Whenever she got caught, her first move was never to just run for it. She was smart, she made plans, she..."

She nodded to herself. "Right. Her first step was always to get a new set of papers. If she's running now, I'll bet she tried that again. And... if he's still in business... I bet I know whom she went to get them from."

She rose to her hooves. She had an idea of where Duty had gone, if indeed she had run away. Cheerilee would go collect the other knights. Then she would pursue, and if Duty were in trouble, she would make it right.

***

Carrot Top, head buzzing after a few lectures on breeding farming bugs, walked into the main hall of the museum to get a drink of water and bumped into her banana-coated friend. "Hi Raindrops!"

"Hi." Raindrops smiled as she looked at an exhibit on cloud ants. "Think it'd be a fun prank to leave a few of these guys for Rainbow Dash?"

Carrot Top chuckled. "Probably shouldn't risk it. Where's Snails?"

"Still in the playpen."

"Um." Carrot Top glanced out the window. "It's been a while..."

"Well, he has to be here," said Raindrops. "I mean, he wouldn't leave."

"Are you sure?" asked Carrot Top.

"Yes! I mean, he'd better not have wandered out into Canterlot!" snapped Raindrops. "And the museum better not have let him!"

Carrot Top raised a hoof and flagged down a docent. 'Have you seen a young colt with an orange coat, green mane, and a snail for a cutie mark?"

The docent nodded. "I think I saw a foal like that. He was talking to two earth pony fillies, a pink-coated one and a gray-coated one, and later I just saw the two of them, so I figured he left..."

"You let him leave?!" The foals turned and watched as Raindrops backed the docent up against a wall. Her voice seemed to fill the room. "How could you--"

"Raindrops! We'll find him!" hissed Carrot Top, sticking her head between Raindrops and the scared docent. "This won't help!"

Raindrops shut her eyes and forced herself to take three deep breaths. Right. Right. Anger later, find Snails now. "You'd better hope he doesn't get hurt," she growled to the docent, and ran for the door.

Carrot Top chased her down just outside the insectarium. "Don't worry! We'll find him," Carrot Top said. "He probably wandered into a candy shop or something."

"What if he got lost?" Raindrops galloped towards the outside gate, leaving Carrot Top to race after her. "Or hurt? Or what if some stupid criminal caught him?"

"We'll tell the Guards. Put out a missing foal report."

Raindrops' eyes narrowed. "If anypony hurts my brother," she said, "I'm going to--"

She burst through the insectarium's front gate and almost ran over Greengrass. Her eyes flashed over his face, and she opened her mouth to snap at him--and then she saw Snails riding on his back and almost skidded into a potted plant by the entrance.

"Dame Raindrops!" said Greengrass. "Glad I found you. I believe you misplaced somepony?"

Carrot Top helped Raindrops up. "Um. Hi, Duke."

"Oh, no need for formalities among such old friends as us. Just call me Greengrass." The Duke beamed. "But anyways, I believe you will be wanting your brother returned to you, Dame Raindrops?"

"Snails!" called out Raindrops. "Why are you on Greengrass's back?"

"He was too short to see you over the crowd, so he had me sit up here so I could help look for you," said Snails in a listless tone.

Greengrass frowned. "Yes, thank you Snails. Now if we're done critiquing my height--"

"I don't care about your height," snapped Raindrops. "What are you doing with my brother? Is this some scheme of yours to get more influence in the Court?" The weathermare approached Greengrass. "Because, if it is, I can be in Luna's office in an hour. She'll ship you to Neighpon--"

"Honestly, Dame, I have much better things to do with my time these days than plan some scheme involving you or your brother." Greengrass knelt and helped Snails get off his back. "He wandered into my home; I fed him and returned him. That is all."

Raindrops looked at Snails. "Snails? What really happened?"

Snails looked at the ground. "I'm sorry I ran away," he managed. "Thank you Mr. Greengrass for bringing me back here. And for giving me a snack."

Raindrops paused, then turned back to Greengrass. "And what else were you doing while you were 'feeding' him? Exploiting his weaknesses, maybe? He looks a lot sadder now than he was--"

"Oh, for... look, would you rather I kicked your brother back out into the abandoned warehouse district? I'll make a note for next time--"

"I'd rather you weren't a total bastard! Then maybe I could trust--"

"I am not the one whose little sibling believed I wish to return him to the manufacturer for an upgraded model, Dame--"

"I don't--"

"HEY!" Both ponies turned to look at Carrot Top. "Um, I mean... maybe we could talk about this later? Not in public?" She dropped her voice. "Away from Snails?"

"Of course." Greengrass straightened himself. "Dame Raindrops, I have returned your brother to you in the same condition I found him. If you have complaints about his mood, I suggest you speak to his school companions. As for myself, I have other things I must do today--"

"Like what?" demanded Raindrops.

"Well, for starters, I must purchase some groceries, buy some more gardening supplies, meet with a pony to discuss some investment opportunities, and collect my mail. I received notice yesterday that a shipment of gardening tools from Caballeria was misplaced somewhere in the train station, so I must find it. Then there's gardening, and weeding, and watering. I'm sure Dame Carrot Top understands." He turned on his hoof, and then said, in a tone of sarcasm, "Also, incidentally, I received a fortune stating that today will be the worst day of my life so far, so I must prepare for that. So unless you wish to experience it with me...?"

"No way," said Raindrops.

"The worst day of your life?" repeated Carrot Top.

"So far," added Greengrass.

"Good," said Raindrops.

Greengrass ignored this. "So, if you'll excuse me, I must get on with that. Good day Dames, Snails."

"Bye Mr. Greengrass," murmured Snails as the noble walked off into the crowd.

Raindrops immediately knelt by Snails. "Hey, Snails. Talk to me. Are you okay?"

"You're mad at me, aren't you?"

"I'm worried about you. What happened in there? Greengrass mentioned your schoolyard companions. Did the bullies--"

"Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon said you wanted to return me and get a better little brother," said Snails. "And Greengrass told me that didn't make sense... but then I asked him why you didn't want to return me. And he didn't have a good answer."

"Greengrass is good at tearing things down," said Carrot Top. "But he doesn't know how to value things. Just because he can't see your value--"

"But I can't see it either!" Snails looked at his sister. "I mean... you don't really want to return me, right?"

"No!"

Snails stared into her eyes. "Why not?"

Raindrops sputtered. "Because... because you're a kind, loving, caring, friendly foal--"

"All foals are those things." Snails sat down on his butt. "And you're a big hero. You're wonderful. You could get any little brother you wanted. You could get a really good one. One that's good at sports and is smart has good manners and doesn't forget about mowing the lawn because he's teaching his spider to do backflips."

Raindrops looked helplessly at Carrot Top. "I... how about we get an ice cream or something and talk this out, okay? You like ice cream. What flavor do you want?"

Snails shrugged. "Whatever."

"Look, bro--"

"Raindrops! Carrot Top!"

The two knights turned to see Cheerilee trotting towards them. "I hope you're having a better day than we are," said Carrot Top. "We've had--"

"There's a problem. Duty's gone. I think somepony scared her off." Cheerilee's eyes were narrowed. "And I saw this notice on the way back." She passed them a copy of the warning about the escaped prisoners; it included pictures and descriptions of the Luca brothers and Soleil. "I think they're connected."

"How?" asked Carrot Top.

"The mob tried to cut off some of Duty's supplies a few times. She managed to get their soldiers thrown in jail. If the dons broke out, it could explain why she ran." She paused. "But if she's in that kind of danger, running won't be enough. We need to find her."

Raindrops looked between Cheerilee and the withdrawn Snails. "I... can't we just ask the Guards?"

"And tell them what? That one of my friends wasn't home? They don't know how unusual it is for her to miss an appointment; they won't start an investigation over that. And we'd need to wait a few hours to file a Missing Pony report." Cheerilee glanced around. "Besides, haven't you noticed there aren't that many Guards around here today? I think they're mostly sweeping for the escaped prisoners. By the time we get enough of them to protect Duty, she could already be hurt. We have to rescue her."

Raindrops was on the verge of refusing, but then Snails piped up. "I don't want another pony to get hurt because you're stuck with me instead of doing knight stuff," he murmured.

Cheerilee heard the sad tone and was at his side in an instant. "Did something happen?"

"Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, and apparently Greengrass," said Raindrops. "The first two lied to him that he's worthless and that I want a new brother or something, and Greengrass... well, he brought him back, probably so he wouldn't get in trouble, but apparently he didn't care enough that Snails was depressed to do anything about it."

Cheerilee immediately wrapped Snails up into a big hug. "Snails, I'm sorry--"

"It's okay," said the foal. "I'm fine."

"No, you aren't." Raindrops turned to Cheerilee. "Look... I want to help your friend. Really, I do. But I'm not taking Snails somewhere where he might get attacked by mafia thugs. And we can't leave him here because there's escaped criminals walking the streets. Not to mention, the last time we tried that, he wandered into Greengrass's house."

Cheerilee thought for a moment. "Carrot Top, could you watch Snails for a bit while Raindrops and I find Duty?"

Carrot Top frowned, but then said, "Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Cheerilee knows these ponies, and you both have more experience with this kind of thing than I do."

"I didn't mean--"

"No, it's fine. Really." Carrot Top smiled, though to Raindrops it looked forced. "It's important to keep Snails safe, and I can handle that. Come on, Snails. Want to go back into the insectarium?"

"No." Snails shook his head. "Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are there."

"Then... well, want to hang out with me, then?" Carrot Top plastered a big smile on her face. "I'll show you the bugs wandering around this neighborhood! That sound good?"

Snails slowly nodded, and then Cheerilee nodded too. "Alright. The plan is, first find Duty, and then Snails, we're going to talk--you, me, and Raindrops, okay? You're a good foal, and you should understand that. So we'll get ice cream or something and we'll figure out what's wrong, and how to make it right. Sound good?"

Snails nodded a little.

"And, until then, can you do me a favor? Can you keep a stiff upper lip and trust that--even if you don't know why at the moment--we all think you're a wonderful foal, and it would be a privilege to have you as a brother?"

"Okay, Miss Cheerilee," said Snails with what might have been a bit of conviction.

"Where are we going?" asked Raindrops.

"Duty'll want new papers if she's going to leave town. The best forger in the city is this stallion named Don Arnaqueur. He'll have seen her, and he might know where she went." Cheerilee nodded. "Let's go."

The ponies moved out into the streets of Canterlot.

***

Don Arnaqueur lived in a very nice neighborhood.

Raindrops waved goodbye to Carrot Top, who would wait for them with Snails at a nearby intersection, then whistled softly as she looked at the building. They were near the castle, and the housing complexes in the area had such ornate styling and architecture that she could practically see the massive rent bills. "Wow. Who can afford these places?"

Cheerilee chuckled. "Most of the ponies that live in these buildings are nonresidential castle servants--lawyers, doctors, craftsmares, and other ponies who serve the Court but don't sleep in the castle. Arnaqueur's day job is a calligraphy specialist. Whenever anything needs perfect penmareship, he's your stallion."

"If he's so close to the Court, I'm surprised he wasn't caught yet," said Raindrops. "Especially after the Gala. What's he like?"

"Well, I've never met him personally. Honestly, I heard he's kind of a sleaze. But Duty told me once that he's the best in the city. As for why he wasn't caught, Duty said that he doesn't forge for the nobles and doesn't want to be involved in politics. He's strictly a 'You want to vacation in Zaldia but you're technically banned from the country? No problem!' kind of guy."

Raindrops snorted at that.

They got into the complex thanks to Cheerilee successfully distracting the doorguard with a quick story about vandals outside, and Raindrops and Cheerilee took the stairs up five floors. "Remember," Cheerilee told Raindrops, "We just want to find out where Duty is. Anything else can wait."

"Fine." Don't know why we're being so nice to a criminal, but... it's for Cheerilee's friend. I trust Cheerilee. I can handle this.

Raindrops and Cheerilee walked through the hallways of the building. The door was closed, apparently solidly--but when Raindrops put a hoof on it, it fell backwards. It had been knocked from its hinges and then propped back up.

The two looked at each other, and then entered the condominium.

The room was dark, with the shades drawn tightly and all the lights off, and had evidently been the scene of a great struggle. Most of the furniture in the first room was smashed in the center of the floor. Raindrops shuddered. "I think we might be too late."

"This doesn't make sense," murmured Cheerilee. "Even if somepony wanted Duty, why wreck Arnaqueur's place? How would that help?"

"Maybe Duty was captured here?" asked Raindrops.

"Maybe, but then where's Don?"

A door in the back of the first room opened up, and a figure walked through. It was too dark to make out his expression or face, but he looked like a stallion with an athletic build. "Hey!" he yelled. "What are you--"

Cheerilee was on him before he could finish, sliding under his legs and throwing him into the couch. "Where's Arnaqueur and Duty?" she yelled. "Tell us!"

"I--"

"Tell us! I know you aren't Don, and--"

"You tell me!" The stallion hopped to his hooves. "You're under arrest for abduction!"

"What? I'm--"

Before Cheerilee could say anything else, Raindrops got the windowshades open, and she realized whom she was talking to. She had seen him, briefly, at the Grand Galloping Gala. "...Baron Max of Nulpar. Um, hello."

Max blushed. "Dame Cheerilee. Dame Raindrops."

The three ponies looked at each other for a long moment, and then Cheerilee let out a nervous giggle. "Alright, I'm sorry for thinking you were abducting anypony. Um, you're okay, right?"

"I've had worse." Max rubbed his legs. "Why are you here, Dame Raindrops, Dame Cheerilee?"

"Looking for a friend. What are you doing here?"

"I was asked to look for a pony named Fetlockson. He vanished out of his house, but the door wasn't locked, so I was suspicious. Arnaqueur was one of his contacts, but when I looked up his address and came to visit him, I found this." Max gestured at the destroyed apartment. "I was checking to see if anypony was still here when you showed up. You?"

"Same, except we're looking for a different vanished pony." Cheerilee paused. "Wait, that's three ponies missing in one day... what do you know about Fetlockson?"

"Um, he was an old stallion, I think he used to be a track star... and he collected articles on a burglar named the Cat-like Colt. And--"

Cheerilee held up a hoof to pause Max while she thought. What do they have in common? Duty was a smuggler, Arnaqueur was a forger, Fetlockson read about a burglar... or, wait... "Baron, is it possible that Fetlockson might have been the Cat-like Colt?"

Max frowned. "I didn't find any certain proof of that. Just a bunch of trophies and the articles. They said that the Cat-like Colt stole all kinds of stuff, including this thing called the Canter Trophy--"

"The Canter Trophy?" Cheerilee grabbed a sheet of paper from an overturned notepad and quickly sketched a picture. "It looks like this. Did Fetlockson have this trophy?"

Max looked at it. "Yes, actually--it was a really big one right by his bed."

"So he's the Cat-like Colt, then. Or he used to be," said Cheerilee. "And now he's missing too..."

Raindrops turned to Cheerilee. "How did you know what it looked like?"

"Oh, I dated a sports historian for a while." Cheerilee nodded slowly. "I don't think this is related to Fetlockson or Duty, or even Arnaqueur. Then we've got a thief, a smuggler, and a forger--one retired, one reformed, one still active. They don't know each other, they have nothing in common that we know of, but they all vanished. Raindrops, I think somepony is hunting down--"

"Ponies with criminal records," finished Max.

"And doing what to them?" asked Raindrops.

Cheerilee shook her head and said, slowly, "I have no idea."

Noble Authority

The knights and the Baron looked warily at each other in the destroyed apartment.

"Alright," said Cheerilee. "Somepony's abducting former criminals." She tapped her chin. "But how? They'd have to get past a doorguard in this building, not to mention knock down a door without Arnaqueur hearing and bolting out the back..."

"And also, why?" Max knelt to examine a smashed table. "Nothing was missing from Fetlockson's apartment, and I'm pretty sure I see a Cavallian platinum watch lying on top of this broken table. If it's not robbery, what's the motive?"

Better question: who cares? Duty's not here. What else are we doing here? thought Raindrops. She was hovering in the air with crossed forehooves. Aloud, she just said, "Hey, if there's nothing else going on up here, can I get out of here? I want to make sure Snails is okay."

"Just a minute, Raindrops," said Cheerilee. She looked at Max. "Any idea why these three in particular? Canterlot's full of criminals to choose from."

Max shook his head. "Haven't been able to think of anything. I mean, they have nothing in common. Fetlockson lived in a two-room garret apartment on the second-lowest level of town. Arnaqueur... I mean, I didn't know him, but judging from his stuff he probably was acquainted with high society. And this Duty--"

"Middle-class," said Cheerilee. "They didn't live near each other, or occupy the same social strata. But there has to be some connection."

"Maybe it's that they all got away with it," drawled Raindrops, flying up to the ceiling. If Cheerilee doesn't wrap this up in five minutes, I'm going back to Snails. He needs me, and I'm not going to let him be sad so we can talk about some stupid forger who probably fled some clients after giving them badly-made passports. "Might want to tell your friends in the Court, Max, that they should do a better job with the whole 'enforcing law and order' thing. So far, it's been a pretty bad day for them."

"Duty got out of the business," said Cheerilee. "She's not an active criminal the Court needs to pursue."

"Yeah, but she didn't go to jail, did she? And judging by his apartment, it sure seems like this Arnaqueur guy wasn't punished either. Sure, he didn't forge for the nobles themselves, but--"

"That wouldn't have mattered," said Max. "After the Gala, when the Princess learned that we were all... uh..."

"Corrupt bastards?" said Raindrops.

Max shut his eyes for a moment. "...she ordered the Guards and Shadowbolts to scrutinize every servant and employee in the castle staff, from the janitors up to the Royal Advisors. She wanted to know how many of them had been bribed by nobles. If Arnaqueur wrote a single memo for any of the nobles in Canterlot, she'd have found out any crimes he committed." He paused. "We are trying to clean up the Court and the city, Dame."

Raindrops said nothing, but when she looked back at Max, she wasn't seeing him. She saw a memory several months old, but still fresh in her mind...

***

"Isn't this great?" chirped Raindrops. "We're going camping! You love camping!"

Snails looked at the meager tent set up in the backyard, then at the house. "You don't want to go camping," he said.

"Of course I do! That's why we're doing it! Mom and Dad and--"

"We're going camping because my bugs filled up the house," said Snails, pointing at the structure in question. He sighed, then looked down at the ground "I'm sorry."

Raindrops' voice caught. She flew up slightly and glanced out over Ponyville, which looked like a catastrophe had struck it. A few houses and buildings were still smoking, and every now and then Raindrops heard a curse or a complaint from elsewhere in the town. "It's not your fault, Snails. It's that zebra's for cursing the town. But once the exterminator gets the house cleaned up we'll be able to go back inside--"

"But he can't come for days cause he's at the farms making sure the bugs don't eat all the fruit," said Snails. "And the town can't pay for more to come from Canterlot."

Raindrops fell silent. "Well... we'll get through it." She hugged her brother. "I promise."

Snails nodded sadly and then bent down to begin eating his dinner of dry grass.

***

Raindrops focused again on Max but said nothing. Yeah, right. I'll believe you lot care about ponies like us when you actually show it.

"Anyways," said Max. "I guess it's possible they just covered their tracks well enough that nopony noticed, but then that wouldn't explain how anypony else could have tracked them down and captured them--"

"No."

The other two ponies turned to look at Cheerilee, who had paled slightly. The magenta mare took a slow breath, then forced herself to continue: "The Court might have found them all. But there's one good reason why some small-time criminals might not have been made to serve their sentences even if they were caught. They could have turned Princess' Council." She took the notification about the jailbreak out of her saddlebag. "Two mafia bosses escaped today. I know Duty had run-ins with other smugglers before, including the Lucas. What if she, and Arnaqueur, and maybe Fetlockson too, testified against the Lucas? What if they know things, like where the Lucas might go to hide out? The mafia would want to quiet them by any means necessary."

"And then they could go into hiding, and we wouldn't have any idea where to find them." Max frowned. "Plus, if we got them back and then they appealed, we wouldn't have access to the witness's testimony to rebut the mafia bosses. Wow. That's... something else."

Raindrops turned back to Cheerilee "You thought the mafia had Duty before--"

"No, I thought they were chasing her before. She's a tough mare; if they just sent a few thugs, she could evade. But apparently they're going all over the city and hunting down any opponents. That's a lot of ponies to escape from." Cheerilee shut her eyes. "We need to save them."

"We will." Max nodded. "Let's return to the castle at once. I will notify the Guards of what's really going on. Captain Armor can have teams sweeping the city in half an hour."

"Great," said Raindrops. "You do that. I need to get back to my brother--"

"Wait." Max held up a hoof. "It would help if you told what you'd seen as well, with Duty and also here. The more details we can provide, the better."

"Oh, I'm confident you can do a fine job on your own, Baron Max." Cheerilee beamed and walked over to Raindrops. "You wouldn't want us getting in the way."

"It wouldn't be a problem," said Max.

"It is for us." Raindrops settled back down to her hooves. "My little brother's been having a bad day, thanks to two of his sociopathic classmates, and that's kind of my priority right now." She paused. "Unless you want him to keep wondering why his big sister vanished during their fun day out in Canterlot."

"No, but..." Max paused, then turned to Cheerilee. "What about you?

"Snails is my student. I want to help him feel better too!" chirped Cheerilee.

Max was silent for a moment. When he spoke again, his eyes had narrowed slightly. "Why do I have the feeling that you're planning on investigating this on your own?"

"Whatever do you mean? We wouldn't dream of interferring with the government's investigation." Cheerilee turned towards the door. "Come along, Raindrops. We have a little pony to cheer up."

"Dame Cheerilee!" called Max. "These ponies are dangerous. If you just wait, I can get Armor to marshal a troupe of Guards. They have the best information on where the mafia ponies might be, and they're strong enough to fight them. Please, just wait until I can get the authorities involved. It's the safest option for everypony."

Cheerilee paused, turned back, and tilted her head, as if deep consideration. "...Max, one of my friends is among the abducted." She held up a hoof to forestall Max's objection. "But I understand. You have a duty to keep civilians safe, which does include us. And the Guards... they could help, if we have to go up against mob hitters. We'll wait an hour. Will that be enough time?"

"I'll make it enough time," said a clearly relieved Max. "Armor's monitoring the escaped prisoner situation in the castle. I'll report to him and get as many Guards as he can spare. We'll meet at... the train station, in an hour. We'll go forward from there, okay?"

Cheerliee looked at Raindrops. "Okay," she said.

***

As they exited the building, Raindrops turned to Cheerilee. "I'm guessing you're not actually waiting an hour."

"Of course not." Cheerilee shook her head. "In the first place, we might not have an hour. Every minute could be their last. In the second place, I don't think Max is going to be able to rustle up a lot of Guards. Same reason as before--they're hunting dangerous mobsters; who's going to prioritize finding a missing forger over that? And lastly, even if Max could bring a bunch of Guards..." She shrugged. "They've never helped before. I can't see them being terribly useful now either. They couldn't handle the salamanders, or Thrash, or... well, all the nobles who broke the law. I think we'll have better luck if we go it alone."

"Then why lie to Max?"

"Let's just say I find it suspicious that we found him in Arnraqueur's trashed apartment. He's not a Guard--he's a noble, and he's not even somepony like Fisher who patrols with the Guards sometimes just to show how rough and tough he is. He pushes papers like the rest of them. Why is he personally investigating an abduction?"

"You think he's involved?" asked Raindrops.

Cheerilee smiled. "I know, it might be hard to accept the idea that a member of our nobility is a criminal..."

Raindrops was still laughing five minutes later when they came back upon Carrot Top and Snails.

"Hey, little bro!" said Raindrops as she approached. "You okay?"

Snails glumly nodded as he got off of Carrot Top's back and climbed onto Raindrops. "I'm fine."

Cheerilee gave Snails a pat on the head. "Did you have fun with Carrot Top?"

"I guess."

Carrot Top shrugged. "I tried to show Snails some bugs in the area. But Snails knew them all already. I guess I wasn't very entertaining."

"It's alright." Raindrops sighed. "What now? There's an ice cream store three blocks down, and--"

Cheerilee shook her head. "No time, remember?"

"Time?" asked Carrot Top.

"We're pretty sure the mafia abducted Duty and at least two other ponies. We need to get them back. Now, I know a hangout the mafia is probably using on the lowest level of the city. All three of us knights will go there and--"

"Woah." Raindrops lifted her wings so they were folded around her little brother. "We are not leaving Snails alone, and we're not taking him to a mafia hideout either. End of story. Unless Carrot Top is going to watch him again--"

Cheerilee shook her head. "I'm the only one of us who can sneak in and poke around to see if they're hiding any prisoners. If only one of you comes with me, you might not be enough to distract them all while I look. Our odds are much better if you both come with." Carrot Top looked cheered at that. Cheerilee continued, saying, "Plus, we'll have the element of surprise--"

"That's not an Element," interjected Snails. "There's only six."

Cheerilee chuckled. "A different type of element, Snails. But that was a good connection!" She turned to Raindrops. "I'm sorry, Raindrops, but it won't be safe if only two of us go in there. If I'm caught it could get messy, and..." She paused. "They could threaten to hurt Duty. So instead, I was thinking instead we use a daycare for Snails. There's plenty in the city."

"No." Raindrops shook her head. "The mafia ponies are breaking into homes and dragging ponies out. I'm not letting Snails out of our sight."

"They aren't targeting foals--"

"Don't care." Raindrops shook her head. "Not happening."

"But then we can't pursue the mafia--"

"Then we don't pursue them."

Cheerilee seemed amost to wilt. "Rain--"

"Cheerilee." Raindrops moved close enough to her that their muzzles were almost touching. "I want to help you rescue your friend. Honest. But if I have to choose between saving three criminals from getting their just deserts, and saving my brother? My brother wins. Hooves down. I will not put him in danger over this."

For a moment, neither of them spoke. Then Carrot Top raised a hoof. "Um... I have an idea. Isn't there a secured room at the train station, for foals whose parents are on delayed trains or something? It's watched by the Transit Guards, and it's in a really public place so nopony is going to be able to abduct anypony. We're Knights; I'm sure they'd let us use it."

Raindrops shut her eyes. She couldn't think of any logical objections, but she didn't want to leave behind her brother. He was her little sibling, he needed her, he'd been failed by her twice already today and she wouldn't fail him a third time, she was getting really frustrated at all of this...

But there are lives at stake. Even if they are criminal scumbags... I'm a knight. I can't just let them get killed...

"Fine," she said at last. "We'll do this fast. Snails, are you okay with staying at the train station for a little bit?"

"Yes." Snails slumped down. "I'm sorry I'm getting in the way."

"You aren't. It's the mob ponies and criminals who are getting in our way."

"Mmm."

"Hey." Raindrops knelt to be at eye level with her brother. "Honestly, you're not. You're a wonderful brother and you haven't caused any problems today. Bad ponies have, and I have to deal with it because that's what knights do--but none of it is your fault, okay? You're too good a pony to ever do the kind of bad things that the mafia did that I have to fix."

Snails smiled faintly, but it vanished quickly. "Thanks," he managed.

Raindrops could tell Snails was still distressed, but she didn't know what to say and didn't have nearly enough time to make Snails feel better. She just sighed and began to trot towards the train station, led by a tense Cheerilee and trailed by Carrot Top. Okay, she thought. When this is done, I am tracking down the Lucas, and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon and Duty and Arnaqueur and Fetlockson and all the rest, and I am personally going to knock some sense into them.

She nodded to herself. That'll be about right.

***

Later, as the Elements worked their way down to the lowest levels of Canterlot, Baron Max found himself working his way through a mountain of paperwork.

Max turned over a piece of parchment as a familiar headache beginning to build. He was struggling through reports from the various precincts in Canterlot detailing the types of cases they had to deal with, from petty vandalism to theft to missing ponies. Unfortunately for him, Viscount Silver Shackles--a good pony, but one who wholeheartedly believed in the adage 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it'--had never bothered to standardize the forms or the codes throughout the precincts. The number that meant 'missing adult pony' in the museum district, for instance, meant 'cow tipping' in the warehouse district... and while the civil police knew the system thanks to years of inertia, Max was having trouble. It was enough to make any rustic, hardy pony like himself want to throw all the papers out a window, flee the Criminal Records department of Canterlot Castle, and go haul himself up the Canterhorn just to drive all the legalese out of his brain.

But he closed his eyes, took a breath, and reminded himself that this mattered. Pony lives were at stake, even moreso than with a regular government bill, and just because he was handling the paperwork instead of being out there and fighting evil with his own four hooves didn't make his contribution any less important. Somepony had to go through the records and figure out if any other ponies had been abducted, and it might as well be him. His secretary, Mrs. Grobnar, and his other assistant, Inky, were asleep, and none of the other nobles were going to help with this. It was up to him to do the work that might save the missing ponies.

The headache faded, and Max allowed himself a small smile. He'd have to thank Posey later. It was she who had taught him a few mental techniques for dealing with the common frustrations of being a noble of the Court. And it was getting easier. When he'd first arrived, he'd spent too much time staring uselessly at bills as if they were homework assignments he didn't want to do. Now, he was one of the more productive members of the Court. And--as Posey had shown him--the nation was the better for it.

So he returned to the paperwork and looked through the next precinct report. There were several possible crimes, and most of them were minor: littering, graffiti, public display of intoxication, a foal selling cups of lemonade in a park not zoned for commerce (Max made a mental note to look into that last one when he had a chance, since he felt that this scenario was perhaps not the intended application of the zoning laws.) But there was also one 10-65, which, according to the big guide to Max's left, meant 'Missing Pony' in that precinct. So Max looked at the name next to the code--Avarici Greedo--, marked it down, and then hailed the Records clerk and asked for all documents relating to that pony. And sure enough, after several minutes of waiting for the records and then searching through them, he found that a Mr. A. Greedo had been arrested and charged with twenty counts of stealing money from charity funds... only for the cases, public and private, to be dismissed before trial.

Reading through the paperwork, Max found that Greedo had apparently approached the charities with an offer. They could drop the charges, and he'd return half the funds... or continue, and he would spend the entirety of his ill-gotten gains on his legal defenses, so they wouldn't recoup a jangle if they won. They dropped their charges. The Throne's case had vanished too... and Max couldn't help but wonder if it was in exchange for testifying against the mob, maybe describing accounting he had done for them. Alternately, maybe the Throne couldn't prosecute without the support of the charities. In any event, Greedo got away with a 50% cut of his ill-gotten gains and a ban issued by Luna Herself preventing him from ever handling finances again. It wasn't a bad deal for that much crime.

Max sighed and added the name to his list of possible 'missing criminals.' If I keep doing this, I'm going to start sympathizing with whoever is taking these ponies, he thought sardonically. Okay, next precinct...

"Good morning, Mounty." Max turned, a smile unbidden coming to his face, as he heard the beautiful voice of Fragrant Posey. She floated into the room with a flutter of her wings, her motions so clear, sharp, and steady that they could be produced by none other than a confident ruler at work. When she landed, the little upward swoop after she touched down seemed to suggest that she hadn't dropped to the ground, but that it had risen at her command to meet her, like it too was subject to her power. Her clothes, a beautiful and exquisite Prench dress with bands of reds and oranges that seemed almost to melt into and accentuate her coat, flared slightly and then descended, as if bowing in supplication. She was the Duchess of Cloudsdale, she was an extraordinarily powerful mare, and she had been teaching Max the arts of politics for quite some time.

Max rose to his hooves and bowed. "Duchess."

Fragrant blushed. "You don't need to be quite so formal, Mounty."

"But didn't you say that, in public, a noble must always maintain decorum?" Max asked.

"So I did." Fragrant laughed a little at that, then approached Max. "Granted, this isn't exactly public. I wasn't expecting an audience. I was just coming down here to pick up a background check on an applicant for my household staff; I couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to wake Notebook, since he stayed up all last day helping me finish my provincial budget." Notebook was Posey's secretary and head of personnel; Max knew that he had a close working relationship with the Duchess. "What brings you to this wing of the castle, Max?"

The Baron looked down at his papers. "Hopefully nothing," he said. "But... I don't know. Some ponies might have gone missing in the city. According to these reports, it might be as many as twenty so far, and that's just of the precincts I already looked through. I'm trying to get as much information as I can so that, when Captain Armor gets here, I can give him a good report."

Fragrant raised an eyebrow. "That seems like more of a task for the Guards than a noble of the Court, does it not?"

Max smield again. He and Posey had discussed often his preference of doing the little, hooves-on things that needed to be done, rather than the high-level things that were his actual job. He was getting better at prioritizing the latter--he honestly was--but sometimes it seemed like other things called to him a little more loudly. "Yes. Normally it is. But most of them are busy with the escaped prisoners, so nopony is left to do this... and I'm worried that the abducted ponies might be running out of time."

Posey frowned. "This isn't going to be like that time when you were almost killed by the Sun Cult, is it?"

"I hope not," said Max. "But I did save a bunch of ponies--"

"And you almost died." Posey moved towards Max. "We have Guards for a reason." She was silent for a moment. "Please promise that, if at all possible, you'll make use of the Guards rather than going to fight criminals by yourself again."

"I promise," said Max. "Trust me, I didn't like getting kicked in the face. Not eager to repeat that experience. I'll use the Guards if I have to--and I'll make sure to get all my committee work done too."

"Good." Fragrant approached and gently pecked the top of his head with her muzzle. "I'd hate to have to stay up late helping you prepare a rider for the Transportation Committee again."

Max blushed. "That happened once. Several months ago."

"Even so." Fragrant's eyes shone with laughter. "When will Captain Armor be joining you?"

"He was supposed to be here five minutes ago." Max checked the clock. "And I don't have much time to spare; I need to be at the train station in thirty minutes. Hopefully it won't take too long to ask him for help when he gets here."

"Ask?" Fragrant raised an eyebrow. "You are a noble of the Court, and he serves the Court. Is 'ask' truly the right word?"

"Request, then?" Max frowned. "I mean, he has his own area of influence. I can't just order him to do what I want."

"No, but you can impress upon him the seriousness of the matter by phrasing what you want in a confident manner. After all--this is a very important matter, is it not?"

Max nodded. "Lives might be at stake."

"Then tell Captain Armor that. Phrase it as something you need, not something you fancy. If he truly cannot help you, he will say so, and will bear no ill will. But if he could help you, and was not convinced of the importance of your request..."

"I get it." Max took a breath to prepare himself. "Sorry. It's just... I mean, when I was a Lord Mayor, everypony respected me, but I'd never have felt comfortable just demanding something from others. And when I see ponies like the Elements or Captain Armor, who protect all our lives... I mean, it's hard to order them around."

Posey inclined her head. "They indeed are renowned ponies." She smiled slightly. "But remember--you are a noble of the government. Your job, in part, includes ordering ponies around. It will help nopony if you neglect that aspect of your job, and as a result some task is not completed."

"I know, it just feels..." He trailed off. "Arrogant."

"Well, I'm not suggesting you act like Archduke Fisher and demand they accede to your every whim, lest Equestria collapse tomorrow." Posey gave Max a gentle smile. "But you do have authority. And part of your job is exercising it when appropriate."

"Right." Max took a breath. "I understand, Fragrant. I--"

Before they could continue, Max heard hoofsteps outside. A few moments later, Captain Armor entered the room. "You wanted to see me, Baron? I have a few minutes before I need to meet with Viscount Shackles and Archduke Fisher about the hunt for the escapees."

Max opened his mouth, realized that Fragrant Posey was in the room with him, ready to notice if he did anything silly, and immediately began to sweat. No! Agh! Bad start! "Captain!" he said, his voice only a little too high. "I've become aware of a pattern of missing ponies in the city. I would--" He cut himself off from finishing the sentence with the word 'like', and instead said, "I mean, if you are able, I need your help to save these ponies." He gestured at the papers. "I determined that..."

He explained everything to Armor as concisely and calmly as he could. The Captain of the city's Guard looked at the papers for several moments. Then he said, "...I appreciate the effort you put into this, Max, but I have a few questions. Besides Arnaqueur, is there any evidence that any of these ponies were taken violently?"

Uh oh. "No," Max had to say.

"Was Arnaqueur's apartment definitely ransacked, or could it, for instance, have been in disarray due to a party?"

"I suppose..."

"Most of these missing pony reports come from a pony missing a single engagement, is that right?"

"Yes."

"And you don't actually know that the escaped mobsters are involved--that's just speculation?"

"No, I can't prove it--"

Armor nodded slightly. "I'd like to help you, Max, but we still haven't gotten all the escapees. There's still three out there--the Luca brothers, and the sun cultist. Those three are all considered extremely dangerous. Mareio injured five Guards when we last caught him, and Manetelli took a hospital crew hostage until the Shadowbolts dragged him out. Right now, every Guard I've got is helping the civil police to look for them. Until these ponies are caught, I can't in good conscience reassign Guards to what might be a few old ponies forgetting to check in with their children and a playboy not cleaning up after a party."

Max opened his mouth to beg for help, then closed it. He knew that was not the noble thing to do. So he said, "Over twenty ponies are missing. Two or three, even five, that might be coincidence. But twenty? Captain Armor, I need some Guards to begin trying to find them. Their lives could be at risk."

Armor shut his eyes for a long moment. Finally, he said aloud, "I can't spare any active Guards for the moment. Literally every pony I have on duty is patrolling the streets or raiding suspected hideouts. But... here's what I can do for you. The prison's under lockdown with a fresh set of jailers right now; all the staff there were taken away to be questioned after the breakout. Most of them have been cleared and sent home, but with the Guards so active today, it'll be another day or so before the paperwork allowing me to put them back on duty is filed. I'm not allowed to use them... but I can request Warden Hangem Higher to make them available to you. You'll probably get about a dozen."

A dozen was a lot better than Max had started with. "Thank you, Captain."

"Of course, Baron."

When he was gone, Max turned to Posey, smiling like a foal who had earned top marks on a test. Posey just laughed. "Very well done, Mounty. I couldnt have done better myself."

"Thank you." Max couldn't stop his grin; he had accomplished something, taken another step towards surmounting the task of becoming the optimal noble. "I need to go find the Elements at the train station, then bring them back to work out a plan with the warden and his guards. Then--"

"Go, go." Posey grinned as she gestured. "Just remember--I'll expect you to tell me all about it when it's over." She beamed. "I like hearing stories about your heroism."

Max laughed, gave her a hug, and ran out the door.

***

"This is a mafia hideout?" asked Raindrops.

Cheerilee nodded. "Three doors down. See those two ponies lounging by the entrance? They're guards."

"They're eggheads!" hissed Raindrops. "Cheerilee,that's a library!"

Indeed it was. The Cobblestone Book and Journal was a small, squat building tucked into the corner of one of the lower levels of Canterlot. Buildings were crammed up against each other, most of them covered in faded and peeling paint, but none of them so dilapidated as to give the appearance of a slum wasteland. It looked just like any other dreary urban residental district to Raindrops. Nothing about it screamed 'mob hangout.'

Cheerilee shook her head. "See how those two ponies have bulges in their saddlebags? Those are probably saps. Note how neither of them actually turned a page in their books in the last minute, and how often they glance up. They're guarding their bosses." She smiled slightly. "Do you know how hard it is for the government to subpoena records of who uses libraries and what they do there? As long as there's a few rooms available to keep the foals out of, they make great bases."

"Shouldn't we get the Guards?" asked Carrot Top.

"You're not scared, are you?" teased Cheerilee. "They're all busy looking for the escaped prisoners. We can handle this."

"But this is such an obvious hideout," said Raindrops, "Wouldn't the Guards have searched it already?"

"It's only obvious if you already know about it. Besdies, the Guard might have looked in--I think they're looking everywhere--but they were only looking for the Lucas. They wouldn't have known to look for signs of Duty and the others. We do." Cheerilee gave a sharp nod. "I've dealt with ponies like this a few times before. I know how to play this. Raindrops, you just need to be confident, but not arrogant--like you're willing to get into a fight, but not desperate for one. Carrot Top, stand by her, silent, strong, like you'll back her up. I'll sneak in through the back."

Carrot Top looked down for a moment. "Are you sure I can't do anything else?"

"Er..." Cheerilee hesitated. "You don't have my experience being sneaky," she said, "And Raindrops is probably better for the front since she's stronger in a fight. But if you want--"

"No, it's fine." Carrot Top flexed a hoof and chuckled. "Carrot Top: farmer, herbologist, muscle for hire. I'll make it work."

Raindrops smiled, then said. "What's the actual plan, Lee?"

"I'll search the place while you keep them busy. If they've been abducting ponies, there'll be signs even if they aren't being stored there--bags of gear with certain supplies, maps and keys to strange buildings, things like that. Just get me a few minutes, and I can confirm if the mob has Duty and the others or not. Okay?"

Raindrops took a deep breath. "Okay."

The library was a three story building. The first room was crammed full of dusty bookshelves, though nopony was there to read them except for the guards outside who followed Raindrops and Carrot Top in. Upstairs was more of the same. Downstairs, though, was a multipurpose room that was empty except for a few doors, a few cushions, and a dozen tough-looking stallions and mares that were lounging about. As Raindrops and Carrot Top entered, one rose to her hooves. "Who in Equestria are you?"

Raindrops glanced at Carrot Top, then took a breath. Starting to wish I sprang for those acting classes. "Knights of the Realm," she said. "Dames Raindrops and Carrot Top. We're here to ask you a few questions."

"Hmm." The pony grinned. "I guess I should be honored, then. Name's Stompina. Now, why am I answering your questions, exactly?"

"Because we're the Knights of the Realm," said Raindrops. "And if you don't, we could make things, uh, difficult for you."

"Oh. Difficult. Gee, I might cry." Stompina laughed. "Got anything else, before we throw you out?"

Raindrops turned to look at Carrot Top for advice, but the farmer just shrugged. Raindrops sighed to herself, then turned back to the boss. "We have the Right of Approach. We--"

"The what?"

"We could go right to Luna and say whatever we wanted about you. We could ask her to arrest you."

"Oh, no, a tattletale. I'm shaking in my horseshoes." Stompina grinned, flashing crooked teeth. "After all, we don't have anything like fancy Rights of Approaches or telegraphs to Luna or whatever. All we've got is a bunch of hooves and saps... and not much tolerance for smart-mouth 'heroes' who come into town thinking they can drive me out."

Uh, Cheerilee? thought Raindrops. Maybe hurry?

"See, when some ponies come in here and start trying to push us around, it... well, we don't get mad, we're nice folks, but our hooves, see, they get real mad. And when they get mad, things happen." Stompina chuckled. "Bad things. So why don't you just turn around now and get out before anything bad happens to you?"

Bad things? thought Raindrops. We've almost been killed loads of times! Ponyville was wrecked! We've had to fight basilisks and necromancers and the Tyrant Sun! I'll show you mad! She scowled. "Mad? Don't worry, I know the feeling. My hooves get mad sometimes too. Actually, they get mad a lot."

"I don't--"

"But let's be clear about something. When your hooves get mad, forty of them get together and team up on some poor stallion for his lunch money. When mine get mad?" Her eyes flashed. "Do you want to hear what happens when my hooves aren't happy, Stompina?"

It was easy for Raindrops to continue. All she had to do was think of Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Greengrass and Fisher and Blueblood, the entirety of the government, and the useless criminals they were wasting time trying to help. She thought of all the pain they had put her, and her brother, and all the good ponies through. And as she continued to speak, she imagined that Stompina and her thugs were the embodiment of all those wicked ponies... and her voice began to grow.

"When timberwolves from the Everfree Forest attacked our village, these hooves ripped them into kindling. When a basilisk threatened the town of Oaten, these hooves turned that snake into a belt." Raindrops jumped so she was directly in front of Stompina. "When a fifty-foot dragon attacked us at an ancient castle, these hooves pulverized him! When the demon ram Grogar, who murdered ten thousand donkeys, returned to life, these hooves ripped apart his necromancy-driven monsters piece by piece, and then drove him back to Tartaros!"

"Ah--" began Stompina.

"And when the Tyrant Sun returned," and Raindrops shoved Stompina into the wall, simultaneously knocking back one more thug who tried to stop her, "She made these hooves very angry. And these hooves responded." She held up her front left hoof. "This hoof has bucked the sun in the face and lived to tell about it," she hissed. "So I would advise you to think very hard about what it would do to your face. Because my hooves do not forgive. They do not forget. And they get angry very easily."

The two were silent for a moment. Stompnia looked terrified. Raindrops felt vaguely sick. She had given into her temper, she knew, and that was dangerous. But it's the only thing to get through to thugs. I'm in control. We'll be okay. She screwed up her face into a stern expression. "Well?"

Stompina stared at Raindrops for a moment more, then managed an awkward laugh. "Of course, of course! I would not dream of trifling with such a great hero! Please, sit down!" She gestured, and cushions were set up by the thugs. "I'm sure that you and your, uh, friend there just want to ask a few pleasant questions."

"If you're lucky." Raindrops released Stompina and let her slide to the ground. "Start talking."

"Yeah!" said Carrot Top. "Start talking!"

Raindrops gave the farmer a look, and she blushed. "Nevermind," she murmured.

Stompina sat at a cushion, and the rest followed suit. "So tell me, what brings the Element strongmare and cook to my door?"

Raindrops frowned. "Cook?"

"I do more than just cook," snapped Carrot Top.

"Right, right, of course. You're also the, uh..."

"Mascot?" asked a mobster in a hopeful voice.

Raindrops told herself that flipping something wouldn't help matters. "Just tell us where the Lucas are."

"We don't know." Stompina frowned. "Wait, that's what this is about? Look, we've been searching too, but they've gone into deep cover. No idea where they are."

"And you expect me to believe you?" asked Raindrops.

Stompina held up her hooves. "Hey, that's all I know! We heard about the breakout the same way you did--when Guards put up notices all over the neighborhood. Trust us, if we knew where they were, we'd be there in an instant to get 'em home to Fillydelphia."

"That isn't happening," said Raindrops. "The Lucas are going to jail. You should be too."

"Yeah, well, nopony's pinned anything on me yet." Stompina recovered a bit of her smile. "Ain't that a shame, huh?"

Raindrops glanced around and noticed that, while there were a dozen ponies in the room besides them, it still seemed somewhat sparse. "Anypony not here today?"

Stompinia hesitated. "Uh--"

"Talk," growled Raindrops.

"A few missing, yeah," said Stompina. "Probably a rival crew tried to mess with me by scaring some ponies that should've been on duty past couple of days. Why would you care?"

Raindrops flashed an alarmed look at Carrot Top. If these guys don't have the Lucas, then they aren't behind the abductions. And if that's the case, those missing thugs were probably abducted too--which means this is even bigger than we thought, plus we don't have the lead we thought we did. Now what?

Stompina rose to her hooves. "If you want, I can show you through the base. You'll see that nopony's hiding back there, bosses or otherwise." She gestured at a big door that was heavily secured with a massive deadbolt. "If you'll just--"

The deadbolt turned, and then Cheerilee walked in from the other side. "It's clean," she said cheerily. "Nopony's here that we're looking for. Time to go!"

Stompina stared. "But... that room was secured--"

"I know," said Cheerilee. She trotted to the door, the mafia ponies somehow knowing to give her a wide berth. "Come on, Knights! We've got a job to do!" Raindrops rose and left after her, Carrot Top bringing up the rear.

***

A few minutes later, once they were gone, Stompina punched a hoof through the plasterboard. "Damn rural punks!"

"Do you want us to get them?" asked one of the thugs.

"Yes, I--wait. No." Stompina paused. "They're hunting for our bosses, right? Else they wouldn't have come in here."

"Sure," said another thug.

"Well, maybe they're smarter than they look. Maybe they'll find them. And when they do..." She grinned. "Clubby Hoof, tail them. We're getting the Lucas back if we have to use the Elements of Harmony themselves to do it."

***

"I'm sorry," said Raindrops once they were a few blocks away. "Carrot Top, I shouldn't have let them insult you like that."

"It's fine." Carrot Top sighed. "Doesn't matter what they think, right?"

"You're not actually taking them seriously, are you?"

The farmer didn't speak for a moment. Finally, she said, "Maybe we could talk about it later? We should help Snails and Cheerilee's friend first."

Raindrops smiled gratefully. "Okay. We'll help Snails first--but after that, you and I are gonna go through all the ways that you're awesome." And Carrot Top couldn't help but grin in response.

Cheerilee coughed. "Anyways, I didn't find any sign of the bosses or the prisoners. Did you learn anything, Raindrops?"

"Yeah. It's bigger than we thought." Raindrops recapitulated what they had found out. "...I think we can assume those mob ponies weren't in jail, or Stompina wouldn't have been expecting them. They're just gone. So the only thing we know now is there's a whole bunch of criminals missing, and the only link between them is they either got away with their crimes or they didn't get much of a sentence."

"Well..." Cheerilee let out a sigh. "At least the mob doesn't have Duty, then. Or the others."

"But somepony does," said Carrot Top. "What should we do?"

Cheerilee shook her head. "I don't know. I don't have any other suspects; I can't imagine any other groups who would be able to abduct so many ponies--especially mafia ponies, who probably know how to fight. And the Guards are still occupied chasing the Lucas." She looked down. "I'm out of ideas."

"Then we should at least pick Snails up," said Raindrops. "And think of something on the way there."

They had made it a few more blocks before Carrot Top ventured, "What if we try it the other way? If we know certain ponies might be abducted, can't we get to them first and wait?"

"Do we know any criminals who got off easy or weren't captured?" said Raindrops. "Besides the entire Night Court, I mean."

"They're behind castle walls. That'd be tough for anypony to break through," said Cheerilee.

"Greengrass isn't. And leaving the Court's not much punishment for everything he pulled. Whoever's doing this might not think that's enough." Raindrops nodded. "Then again, I don't actually care if he gets abducted, so..."

Cheerilee laughed at that. "I'd like to think so, but he made it sound like he'll be spending all day away from his home dealing with a mail mixup. Unless the postal service is in on this and mixed up the mail to get him to walk into a trap, he's probably not going to get abducted today."

Raindrops had a brief image of Ditzy sitting atop a muffin throne and putting stamps on 'abduction' paperwork. Chuckling at the image, she said, "Okay... do we know anypony else in this city who broke the law and got away with it, or only got a slap on the hoof?"

"What qualifies as a slap on the hoof?" asked Carrot Top.

"Like, a few months in jail, or house arrest, or..."

She trailed off and the three looked at each other.

"Oh, no," whispered Cheerilee. "Twilight."

Raindrops knew how she was getting into town as well. By train. Arriving at the same station where Snails was waiting. "Snails!"

They took off at a dead run for the train station.

***

Greengrass frowned as he picked his way through the freight tunnels. It had taken long enough to get in--the place was surrounded by Guards and police on the lookout for the prison escapees, and he'd had to explain who he was for almost ten minutes before they let him pass--only for the freight director to tell him that his package had accidentally been left down by the loading docks. Apparently it had just slipped off a cart, and nopony had actually taken it up to be sorted, processed, and sent on to his home. He had offered to send a team to find it, though it would take a few hours to get one together--union rules, he said. Greengrass had smiled, thanked the director, and then promptly snuck down into the freight area to go get it himself.

The train station was built into the Canterhorn, and while the surface level was big as it was--running passenger trains to and from every major city in Equestria, it required lots of space--the underground section was larger yet. These were the freight lines, the massive trains that docked under the city every day to disgourge a neverending supply of goods for the populace. There were dozens of tracks, along with wheelhouses, roadhouses, garages, repair bays, and everything else neeeded to keep the trains running on time.

Still, the tunnels seemed oddly deserted, and even the lights were dimmed. Greengrass learned the reason for this fairly soon--he saw a posted notice announcing that, due to the escaped criminals having a history of hiding underground, the tunnels were considered unsafe until they were recaptured, and the Shadowbolts were requesting that ponies avoid them. But something about that seemed odd to Greengrass. Strange, he thought. Wouldn't they just shut down the train station? After all, if the escapees can hide in here, they could slip into the crowd up there as well. Maybe some newbie Shadowbolt issued that order.

He found the main track bed, ten tracks parallel to each other with large platforms on either end. The platforms were barely-controlled chaos, with huge pallets of goods stacked all over the place, as well as cranes and other equipment that was presumably used for loading and unloading sitting in their midst. Greengrass could not find his package. But, at one end--underneath an elevated booth with the control levels that turned the wheelhouses and guided the trains through the underground tunnels--he did hear something from a small office. Another worker, at last. They might know where my shipment is. And so he entered...

Only to find Twilight Sparkle.

"Agent Sneak Attack!" Twilight turned to face the door, smiling. "See? I waited just like you said I should! Do you have the ring..." She trailed off. "You're not Sneak Attack."

"No. No I'm not." Greengrass frowned. This was setting off all his alarm bells.

"So, who are you? Are you here to escort me to my parents?" asked Twilight. "I really want to see them!"

"No, I am not. My name is Greengrass, Miss Sparkle. I worked with your father in the Night Court for a time. You were already traveling the land to study magic, I believe. Anyways, I think we should leave--"

Twilight blinked. "Greengrass? I think my father told me about you." She tilted her head. "Didn't you go crazy six months ago?'

What? "No," said Greengrass, looking around. "I don't think--"

"Yeah, he said you broke down at the Fall Formal Ball for all the high-level nobles."

Oh. "I did not break down. I was just... trying to advocate for a very important bill." Greengrass didn't want to think about that time, but he found his thoughts drifting back regardless. "It was to help a dear friend of mine." He tried to get back on track. "Miss Twilight, I thought you were under house arrest in Ponyville."

Twilight's smile grew. "I was, but I've been on such good behavior that I was granted leave to visit my family for the weekend! Agent Sneak Attack brought me all the way here. It's just, there was a problem with my magic-blocking horn ring," She waved a hoof at the ring around her horn, which was indeed sparking, "And he said I'm not legally allowed to leave the train station without a working one, so he told me to just wait here and he'll come back with one!"

Greengrass stared. First of all, you can't get a pass to go home to visit your parents while you're under house arrest for at least a year, generally. I suppose Luna might make an exception for Night Light's daughter, but not so soon after denouncing us all for nepotism. It's not possible that you have a real pass to go home. Second, there's no law about leaving the train station without a ring. Why would the train station be special? Either you can't leave home without one, or you don't need one at all. Third... Greengrass gulped. Third, somepony went to a lot of effort to get you here without looking like they were doing it. And now I'm here too. This is not good.

"Do you believe in fortunes, Miss Sparkle?" he asked as he heard doors leading away from the track bed begin to close.

"No, of course not. Those are just superstitions. Why?"

A huge, bulky figure with a glowing horn stepped out of one last door before it too slammed shut and locked. He growled something inarticulate and aimed his horn at the office.

"Because," said Greengrass. "I think I'm starting to."

Author's Note

Poor Twilight. Don't you hate when that free trip home turns out to be an elaborate plot to do something unspecified but presumably unpleasant to ya?

Max's servant 'Inky' is a reference to something Talon&Thorn is doing now.

Raindrops' speech about her hooves was a really fun part of this chapter.

We'll continue to learn more about what happened with Notary in later chapters. Of course, we do know she survived, so I guess the Duke did something right. But we'll learn more about what that was... and what that cost him.

I've been looking forward to introducing bulky-pony since beginning this story. Showing him next time is going to be a blast. :-)

Canterlot Station

Greengrass dove back inside the office just as the pony's horn flashed and blasted a bowling-ball sized glob of energy at him.

The energy smashed into the office wall and exploded, sending concrete flying and blasting open a hole wide enough to fit a pony's barrel through. Greengrass peaked through the hole and noted with dismay that the new pony's horn was already starting to glow again. "Look," he called. "I'm sure we could talk this out. If you want money--"

The enemy pony growled something inarticulate and cast another energy mortar at them.

"What's going on?" yelled Twilight as the mortar pounded through the office wall. "Who's that?"

"An assassin!" called Greengrass, trying to crouch under the barrel-high remains of the wall.

"Assassin?" squealed the mage. "What? For who? Why?"

"Excellent questions. Let's investigate them later. Can you teleport us out of here?"

Twilight yelped as a blast of energy sailed through the hole and almost hit her in the head, skimming the very back of her mane before blasting into the wall behind them and causing a shower of concrete dust to fall from the ceiling. "If you can get this ring off!" She dashed over to Greengrass and lowered her horn. "Hurry!"

Greengrass pushed his hoof against it, but it sparked and would not move one inch. "It seems to be stuck," he said. "Did you--"

"What?!" Twilight brought a futile hoof up to her own ring, which continued to spark. "How can it be stuck?! Stupid broken--aah!"

Greengrass watched her dive under another energy blast. Okay, so an ostensible Shadowbolt lured her here, gave her a ring to disable her magic, probably cleared out the tunnels with that fake notice, and vanished. I think it's safe to say that he's not really a Shadowbolt, unless they've gotten into the abduction business, and he's not coming back. We're on our own. "In that case, Miss Sparkle, get behind cover and get ready to run." He tilted an ear and heard footsteps stomping slowly towards the office. "As soon as he enters the room, gallop out of here. I'll follow."

Sparkle made a small 'meep' sound, then ducked behind some rubble and murmured, "Okay, okay, staying calm... run, right..." She took a deep breath as the stomping footsteps came even closer. "Thanks, Duke, for helping me."

"Oh, anypony would do the same." Specifically, anypony who knows how vengeful your father is to ponies who fail his daughter. "Get ready--"

The approaching figure stepped through the hole in the office wall, large boots slamming into the ground with audible clangs. Shadows played over his face and coat in a constantly shifting pattern that Greengrass recognized as the result of a standard concealment spell; it rendered the pony's face, coat, mane, and cutie mark completely indistinct, even though the Duke was only a few inches away. Greengrass did observe that the pony's horn was short and unusually angular, looking more like a square pyramid with a flat top than the usual cone. But even more importantly, Greengrass could see the enemy's build, and what he saw dismayed him--the shadowy figure was as big as a carriage, and most of that was corded muscle. Still, he was looking at Twilight, not Greengrass, and that was a weakness the Duke could exploit. He took a breath, rose from his prone position, brought to mind everything he had learned from his pugilist lessons, and punched the figure in the face on his blind side.

It had absolutely no effect.

"Ow!" Greengrass looked down at his hoof, which burned with pain as if he'd punched a brick wall. "I--"

The figure grabbed Greengrass, lifted him over his head, and threw him out of the office onto the track bed.

Stars burst across Greengrass's vision as his head knocked against a rail, but he managed to get up in time to see the figure move further into the office. Okay, think. He could easily have killed me, but he didn't, so he wants me alive. He's probably going to chase me towards--

A scream sounded from the office, and then Twilight went sailing out, hitting Greengrass in the barrel. He fell down with a cry but quickly forced himself back up. "Miss Sparkle, run!"

"Right behind you!"

As if to punctuate the statement, mortars began blasting right behind them.

Greengrass dashed down the tracks, Twilight on his heels, and looked around for an escape. All the doors had been sealed, and there were no railroad employees anywhere in sight. No witnesses, and no way out. Whoever planned this thing knows what they're doing.

A crane suddenly lit up ahead of them, and Greengrass saw a silhouette of another pony in the cab. The crane's claw rotated around and grabbed a big metal box that was open on one side, then began to turn towards them. As Twilight screamed, Greengrass thought, The big pony is going to drive us towards the crane, which which will get us into the box, then pick us up and ship us out of here. He opened his mouth to tell Twilight, then closed it--he couldn't see any way out of it, and panicking her wouldn't help anything. Maybe we can get ahead of the crane, out of its range. But--

An energy blast like a mortar sailed over their heads and blasted the path in front of them. Greengrass and Twilight skidded to a halt.

The hulking figure behind them slowed to a trot, his horn glowing again as if he might just blast them anyway. He growled something inarticulate, and the crane began to whirr above their heads.

"Well," said Greengrass. "I do have to say, this is an excellent abduction attempt."

"What?" asked Twilight.

"I mean, normally you get a few thugs with saps and blackjacks, but this one took effort. I'm impressed."

Twilight stared at him like he was crazy. "I just wanted to see Mom," she said. "This isn't fair!" She turned back to the huge pony who had chased them towards the crane. "You hear me? This isn't fair!"

Greengrass saw the box descending towards them. Once they were in it, he knew, there would be no chance of escape. But he could see no way to escape without being mortared. He shut his eyes.

Then he heard a door break down, and the familiar voice of Raindrops cry out, "HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!"

***

The Elements had charged into the train station at full tilt, almost running over the civil police who were checking everypony's identification by the doors.

"Excuse me, mares! You need to stop and identify yourselves!" called out one officer as they approached.

"Knights of the Realm! Let us through!" yelled Raindrops.

"You need to stop--"

"KNIGHTS OF THE REALM!" Raindrops was bearing down on the officer, running at her absolute fastest. "Lives to save! Get out of our way!"

The guards looked at each other, then quickly parted.

Raindrops sprinted into the terminal and leapt into the air, flying above the startled passengers and staff on the ground. The waiting area for foals was dead ahead, but she could already visualize herself entering it and finding no sign of Snails. She put on a burst of speed and flew through the door--

And saw Snails, sitting on a brightly colored chair and looking at an ant on his hoof with a glum expression.

"SNAILS!" cried Raindrops, sweeping him up into a gigantic hug. "Thank the Stars you're okay!"

"Waagh!" Snails blinked at Raindrops in confusion, even as he released the ant onto a windowsill and returned the hug. "Is something wrong?"

"Are you okay, ma'am?" asked a transit guard, trotting over from his post.

Now seeing that Snails was safe, Raindrops felt slightly silly, but her relief was more than enough to drown out that emotion. "I'm fine. Just fine. Thanks." She hugged Snails close. "I'm glad you're okay."

Cheerilee, who had come up behind Raindrops, poked her on the shoulder. "We should find Twilight," she said.

"In a minute." Raindrops put Snails on her back. "Are you feeling a little better now?"

"Mmm."

No, then. Damn it... "Why don't we get you some candy or something?"

"I tried, but they're closed," said Snails. "Most of the places here are closed."

"What? Why?" asked Carrot Top. "Because of the escapees?"

"I dunno."

Cheerilee frowned. "That's odd, isn't it?"

"I dunno," repeated Snails.

Raindrops saw Cheerilee begin to travel down her own line of thought, so, as the magenta pony left the room--probably to look for Twilight, Raindrops guessed--she turned her own attention back to her brother. "So, what did you do while your big sister was off saving the day?"

"Thought."

"About what?"

"Stuff."

Raindrops' smile became slightly strained. "What stuff?"

"Snails stuff." The foal sighed. "I dunno. I was trying to think of things that I'm good at. But I couldn't think of any."

Arrgh! How can I break him out of this? Raindrops thought for a moment, then said, "You know, I felt the same way at your age."

"But you're awesome! You're good at lots of stuff!" Snails waved his hooves. "You're the best in the world at lots of stuff, even!"

"Like what?" Raindrops asked. "I'm an okay weathermare, but I'm not as fast as Rainbow Dash and I'm not as good a sculpture as Flitter. I'm strong, but Cheerilee always beats me when we spar. I'm pretty honest, but sometimes I tell a fib--like when I told Mom I was just holding those romance books for a friend."

"But... but you're awesome!"

"You're right! I am! I don't need to be the best in the world at anything to be awesome." She tickled her brother with a wingtip, and he managed a faint smile. "I'm a pretty good weathermare, and a pretty strong pony, and a pretty honest pony, and a pretty neat pony all around. And I'm still awesome. Can't you see that, even if you aren't the smartest or the strongest or the best magician right now, you're also awesome?"

Snails paused. "Well... I guess..."

"And that isn't even--"

"Raindrops!" The mare turned to see Carrot Top waving at her. "Cheerilee found something important. Come on!"

"Carrot Top, I'm having a moment," Raindrops growled.

"This is about Twilight." Carrot Top hesitated. "She might be in big trouble."

Raindrops growled to herself, but looking back, saw that Snails' smile had already started to fade. "Come on, little bro," she said at last. "Let's go see what homework Cheerilee has for me."

Snails giggled softly as Raindrops moved out.

They followed Carrot Top to a closed ice cream stand by a stairwell leading down to the freight tunnels. The store was closed, and the proprietor looked annoyed. "I don't know what to tell you," he said. "That's what happened."

Cheerilee turned to the others. "The shops are closed because most of them store their supplies down in the freight area, and today they can't go there because somepony put up a sign saying the Shadowbolts were closing the freight lines until all the escaped prisoners are recaptured."

"What's wrong with that?" asked Raindrops.

"It makes no sense to shut down the freight lines but not the passenger lines. Isn't an escapee more likely to sneak into a coach car then to hide in a freight pallet? They'd be a lot more noticeable mixed in with the freight, right? Something's wrong here. And also..." she turned to the ice cream stallion. "The two ponies you said you saw going downstairs earlier. One of them had a purple coat?"

"Yeah, a purple-coated mare with a star-shaped cutie mark. Looked real happy. The other pony was a stallion who looked kind of cop-like--uniform and all that."

Cheerilee turned to her friends. "Somepony lured Twilight into the tunnels and cleared everypony else out of them. We've got to get her."

Raindrops felt Snails tighten his grip on her back slightly. "But--"

"Raindrops. This is Twilight. She's your friend," said Carrot Top. "We have to save her."

"I don't want Twilight to get hurt 'cause of me," murmured Snails. "She's a good pony."

Raindrops fought off a jolt of anger. "...Snails, could you wait in the daycare back there just a few minutes more? I will get you soon, for real this time, promise. She let Snails off and waited for him to walk back towards the direction of the daycare, then turned to Cheerilee and Carrot Top. "Let's go beat the tar out of whoever's attacking Twilight. And possibly Twilight, for getting into this."

Cheerilee cracked a smile, and then the three ran.

They heard the explosions by the time they had reached the bottom of the stairs but after traveling through several hallways in pursuit of the sound, they found a door that seemed to have been magically sealed. Cheerilee and Raindrops reared back and kicked it, the door went flying off its hinges, and they saw the train bed before them. They saw Twilight and Greengrass, and the lowering crane, and the pony with the glowing horn standing in front of them.

"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!" screamed Raindrops, charging in.

The bulky pony turned and blasted what looked like an energy mortar round out of his horn. It sailed into the air, above Raindrops and to her left. She began to charge forwards--

"SCATTER!" yelled Cheerilee, knocking Raindrops to the side.

A moment later, the mortar hit a large pile of boxes and crates that had been stacked by the door. The box that was hit burst into rubble, and the rest collapsed in front of the door... and on the knights that had entered. Raindrops felt the rubble crash on top of her back half, tried to move, and found that she was stuck. "Damn it!"

Cheerilee had managed to roll free of the collapsing boxes. "Raindrops, Carrot Top! Are you okay?"

Carrot Top made a muffled sound from somewhere behind Raindrops. "I'm okay, but I'm behind the rubble! I can't get through!"

Raindrops shook her head, twisting to free herself but only sliding out another half an inch. "I'll get the door unblocked and let Carrot Top in. Deal with the mortar guy!"

Cheerilee nodded and ran towards the unicorn, whose horn was already charging to fire another mortar. "Hey, big guy. Why don't you try a pony that can fight back!"

The pony growled and lowered his horn.

***

Cheerilee flung herself flat and the mortar blasted over her head, tearing into the rail and sending chunks of metal flying through the air. The beast-like pony began to charge again, but Cheerilee didn't wait. She turned her dive into a roll, slipped behind the big pony, and kicked the back of his leg with a blow intended to snap the bone.

It had no effect.

The pony turned and swung a heavy hoof at Cheerilee, who dodged it and retaliated with a series of strikes at the pony's face. All the blows seemed to glance off, as if the pony were too bulky to be hurt, or just immune to pain. She gulped as she skipped back a step to dodge another blow. This one could be tough...

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Twilight and Greengrass fleeing the tracks. The crane overhead was rotating and lowering down, as if trying to smash them into the track bed, but Cheerilee didn't have time to focus on them. The big pony was charging his horn for another attack. Cheerilee ducked low, the pony aimed low, and Cheerilee sprang over it at the last moment, leaping onto the stallion's back. She wrapped her hooves around his neck and began to squeeze.

The pony reared back and flung himself over, knocking Cheerilee against the ground and almost crushing her beneath his mass. When Cheerilee got up, she felt a few drops of blood on her head. Gritting her teeth, she dropped into a combat stance she had learned during a stint in Saddle Arabia. Okay. Now I'm mad.

The stallion swung at her, and Cheerilee was able to dodge the blows--he was strong, but not as fast as her, and his limbs were heavy enough that he couldn't match her reaction time. Still, judging from the divots he was creating in the metal rails when his hooves struck the ground, he'd only need to land one solid hit to lay her out. And while she was confident she could avoid him for a while, she was running out of ideas as to how to damage him.

But she wasn't going to lose, not when so many ponies she cared about (plus Greengrass) needed her. So she laughed, and she dodged another blow, and she tried once again to incapacitate the beast.

***

Greengrass sprinted into a dark corner behind several rows of stacked boxes."I don't think the crane operator can see us here, Miss Sparkle. The boxes will protect us from him."

"That's good," managed Twilight. "What about the unicorn? Will the boxes protect us from him?"

A mortar screamed over their heads and gouged a huge hole into the concrete wall

"Ah, yes," said Greengrass. "About that..."

Twilight shut her eyes and began to chant, 'No more running, no more hiding.' Greengrass did his best to tune her out and think. Cheerilee is having trouble against the mortar pony, so I can't just wait here for her to save us. The other two Elements are buried under or behind rubble, and I can't get to them with the crane operator trying to smash me with that box. We have to take out the crane, but Twilight's not much use without magic. That leaves... me.

The thought that his safety was once again dependent on his ability to fight his way past armed and crazy terrorists gave Greengrass pause. Yes, he thought, he had survived the Sun Cultists a few months ago and even saved Notary--barely--but that was due to his setting up an intricate plan that nopony had seen through, and even then he had still needed Baron Max, his father Greenmeadow, and an old diamond dog named Wolfgang or something to bail him out and save his life. Now he had no plan, no support, and he doubted Max would show up with the cavalry again. He knew a rigged game when he saw one, and this was as rigged as it got. It might be smart to just slip away and try to find an exit that hadn't been blocked off.

He looked at Twilight and saw that she had opened her eyes and was looking determined. "Any ideas for how we can help the Elements?" she asked. Something in the tone of her voice told the Duke that she wouldn't be abandoning them; that particular weakness of her seemed to have vanished. And while he knew he could just abandon her...

Her dad would kill me, he told himself, and decided that was his reason for not leaving.

"Alright," he said, knowing that if he left Twilight alone she would likely do something stupid. The crane pony isn't targeting the other Elements, and the mortar pony is distracted. She's safer on the other side of the track as long as somepony distracts the crane pony and keeps him focused here. "Once I distract the crane, can you go to that pile of rubble and start digging the Elements out, please?"

Twilight nodded. "Yes. I can do that."

"Splendid. This shouldn't take more than a few moments." He flashed a smile, then darted around the boxes and back into the crane operator's field of view.

Even as the crane swung around, Greengrass took a long look at the cab and the surrounding boxes. The crane was an old, rusty machine, built before the latest round of magically-reinforced metals from Fisher Metallurgy, and poorly maintained to boot. A sufficiently heavy weight could probably damage it. And there were massive boxes stacked all around, freight shipments that hadn't been moved yet...

Greengrass ran as quickly as he could, staying ahead of the descending box and flinging himself to the side just before it slammed into the ground. He barely avoided being cut in half, but the crate began to rise again almost immediately, so he just picked himself up, turned around, and kept going. He needed to keep the operator completely focused on Greengrass to the exclusion of all else. That meant he couldn't rush this. He had to play it out and draw him in, even if it meant risking losing his head.

Across the track, Twilight ran up to Raindrops. "Need help?" she asked.

"Get this junk off me!" Raindrops tugged frantically, but couldn't extricate her back half from the pile of rubble. "NOW!"

"Right, right, working on it!"

Meanwhile, Greengrass ran in five loose loops back and forth in front of the crane, turning around as if confused whenever he had to dive for cover. He noticed the crane motions becoming sharper and more impulsive, the box beginning to bang into the track and the surrounding freight more, as if the operator were getting mad. Once the motions of the crane were almost violently impulsive, Greengrass drifted near one of the tallest sets of freight near the crane and slipped around it, as if trying to hide. The crane wheeled around, the box swinging in a big arc and coming back towards him. Greengrass tensed, then dodged at the last moment. Now!

The box smashed into the freight and toppled several pallets down onto the crane, crushing it like an overripe tomato. As the frame crumpled, the operator jumped out--and then the crane's arm itself collapsed, falling into the track, and toppling the box towards Cheerilee and her opponent.

"Hah!" Cheerilee gracefully leapt away, and as the bulky pony moved to follow, the empty box slammed on top of him. It landed open-end down (more's the pity, thought Greengrass,) but at least it trapped the beast. A few thumps sounded from within the box. And then, after another few moments, everything was quiet.

Greengrass wiped the sweat from his brow as if he had just finished a mildly challenging workout. "Well!" he said. "That was certainly invigorating. Thank you for the assist, Dame Cheerilee."

Cheerilee, sweating hard, raised an eyebrow. "Assist?"

"Well, I think I clearly had things under control, but your aide is still very much appreciated!"

"Really." Cheerilee rolled her eyes. "Look, just tell me where Twilight is, Greengrass. I'm not in the mood for your games."

"Oh, but isn't life a game?"

"Greengrass. Where is Twilight?"

"Right behind you."

Twilight, who had gotten across the track and was almost done digging Raindrops out, waved a hoof. "Is it over?"

"I think so," said Greengrass, trotting over to Cheerilee. He looked at the crushed cab. "There's no exits from this room, so we just need to collect whoever was in the crane, and--"

A loud roar sounded from under the empty box, and then a moment later, it began to lift off the ground. Greengrass stared as he saw the massive pony within hoisting the box--the box so heavy it had been formerly lifted by an industrial crane--over his head. "Um."

"Seriously?" asked Cheerilee.

"AAAAARGH!" The pony leaned back, muscles bulging, and then threw the box at Greengrass.

The Duke froze, paralyzed by the sheer absurdity of the sight. He told himself to move, but as he saw what looked like half a train car flying at him, he couldn't. His body would not obey him. So this is how I die--

Cheerilee tackled him down, and the box sailed over his head. "Move!" she snapped. "Make yourself useful and go dig out the other knights! NOW!"

"Forget us!" yelled Raindrops, bursting free of the rubble even as Greengrass rolled to one side to avoid the next mortar from the incredibly strong enemy. "I"m out, and Twilight will get Carrot in a minute! Grab the crane operator! Don't let that pony get away!"

Even as Cheerilee began to fight the enemy unicorn again, Greengrass quickly looked around. He saw a light above the tracks where there hadn't been one before, from the control booth. "He fled to the the control booth," called Greengrass. "But... wait. There's no exit from there, and no weapons. Why..."

With a loud clunk, the switches at the end of the track began to move.

What?! thought Greengrass. Why would they move the tracks? Unless... what, are they going to try directing trains to run us over? Nopony could be that crazy. They--

At the far end of the track, he saw a large tunnel door slide open, and the distant headlight of a now-moving train approaching them.

Greengrass gulped. Okay. Maybe they are that crazy.

***

"Excuse me, have you seen the Elements of Harmony?"

The ice cream stand owner looked at the earth pony in front of him. "Yeah, why?"

"I need to find them. I'm Baron Max, of the Night Court. I was supposed to meet them here."

"They went down those stairs." The proprietor jabbed a hoof at the passage to the freight level. "Those three, and then a little colt followed them a few minutes later. Any idea why everypony's going down there all of a sudden?"

Max gulped. Why did they go down there? Are they chasing those abductors? But they don't have backup... and those guys took over twenty captives. The Elements could be in trouble! And an innocent colt too!

Without responding to the ice cream stand owner, he pushed past him and raced down the stairs.

***

Twilight pulled Raindrops out of the rubble just in time for the weathermare see the train engine rushing towards Cheerilee and her opponent. "Lee! Dodge!"

Cheerilee sprang left and the opponent managed to lumber right just before the engine car blasted through the space where they had been. It rolled down the track and onto a large turntable near the end of the room... but the turntable suddenly rotated so quickly that the engine was rushing back towards them. "The operator's controlling the turntables!" she called.

"This is insane!" screamed Raindrops. "He's going to hit his own partner!"

"Somehow, I'm not sure that would stop him," called Greengrass.

Cheerilee managed to shove the big pony away for a moment, then threw herself away from the train as it screeched past again. "Twilight, how's Carrot Top?"

"I'm okay!" came Carrot Top's muffled voice from behind the rubble. "Still trying to dig my way in!"

"I'll get you out," said Twilight. Meanwhile, the train engine had reached the turntable at the other end of the room and was swinging back to run at them again.

Raindrops turned back towards the rubble. "I'll help--"

"No time!" Cheerilee ducked a punch from her enemy. "Twilight, dig through to Carrot Top and get the door unblocked! Raindrops, Duke, get to the control tower! Stop that train!"

Raindrops hesitated, but seeing Cheerilee only barely dodge being run over, nodded and flew up into the air. "Hey, crane guy! I'm coming for--wagh!" A blast of energy sizzled out of the control booth window and almost knocked her out of the sky. "Damn it!"

"Stay low, Dame Raindrops!" yelled Greengrass, who was beginning to run along one side of the tracks. He was eying the approaching trains with trepidation. The path next to the track had become largely impassable due to the rubble caused by stray mortar shots; running along the track was the only option for him. "Fly under his sight, and--"

"Shut up!" yelled Raindrops, dropping lower anyway. She twisted to one side and dodged the train, which was now crossing the room every few moments. She noted as it passed that there were no conductors in it and that the levers of the engine were enveloped in a greenish magical glow. "You only care because if we die, Corona will burn your stupid garden!"

"I don't see why--"

"Just stop him!" yelled Cheerilee. She cursed as the unicorn scored a glancing blow off her shoulder and was sent stumbling backwards.The engine almost flattened her, but she caught her balance at the very last moment, and though she teetered in the train's path for a moment, she managed to just barely dodge it. "Hurry!"

Raindrops grit her teeth and charged forwards, keeping up with Greengrass as they moved down the track. The train engine rushed at them in almost random patterns, swinging about on turntables so it was always chasing them down the track they were on, but they managed to avoid it and neared the stairs leading up to the control booth. "Come on..." muttered Raindrops through gritted teeth. "Come on--"

"GO RAINDROPS!"

Raindrops turned, startled, to see Snails, who had squeezed through the small hole between the rubble and the top of the doorframe that Twilight had cleared. It was still too small for an adult like Carrot Top to get through, but it seemed that the little colt had managed it. His horn was glowing and he was waving a hoof. "GO RAINDROPS! YOU'RE AWESOME!"

"Snails!" screamed Raindrops. "Get upstairs!" Damn it! He's using magic--he's probably going to throw rocks at the mortar pony or something. "Twilight--" She won't be able to get him out of here with the opening that small; he'll fight and won't fit through it. "Get a bigger opening and then GET SNAILS OUT OF HERE!"

"Sorry!" called Carrot Top. "He jumped on my back from behind and climbed through before I could stop him!"

Snails didn't even seem to notice the conversation. "Beat them up! Kick their butts!"

Raindrops was so distracted that she almost didn't notice the train bearing down on her. Throwing herself aside at the last second, even feeling the train sliding past the feathers of her left wing, she cursed and then blasted up at the control booth. If this pony hurts one hair on Snails' mane, I'll throw him out of the booth!

She burst through the left door of the booth just as Greengrass burst through the right. The unicorn before them was lean and wiry, his face and coat magically obscured like his partner's had been but his horn--very long, extremely sharp--was clearly visible. He looked from Greengrass to Raindrops. "Ah--"

"There are two of us, and you're out of machines," said Greengrass, in an almost pleasant tone. "This is the part where you concede the game."

"I've still got a train on the board," the operator growled. "Back off or I'll run over your pink friend down there."

Down below, the train engine was screeching towards Cheerilee. She dodged a blow from the mortar pony and sprang back far enough that he began charging his horn to fire another blast at her. She waited, then jumped in at just the right moment and struck the side of his horn. The shot went to her right, striking not her, but the ground in front of the train. With a screeching sound, the engine ran over the broken track and derailed, screeching against the ground and almost flattening Cheerilee as it skidded into the sides of the track bed and sent dozens of huge crates crashing into splinters.

The pony paused. "Damn," he growled. His voice was low and brusque.

Greengrass reached for him--but the pony's horn flashed, shooting a blast of magical energy at the Duke. Greengrass yelped as he was knocked back into the wall. Raindrops sprang at the unicorn, dodged under the next attack, and decked the pony hard in the chin. The unicorn staggered backwards and leapt at Raindrops, who beat him down to the ground, but when Raindrops went to follow up with a blast to the gut, the unicorn rolled to the side and fled. He raced down the stairs, passed the now-stationary trains, and ran back towards the now-resumed battle between his ally and Cheerilee, as well as Twilight, Carrot Top...

And Snails.

Raindrops cried out and gave chase, but she was slower and the unicorn quickly outdistanced her. His horn glowed, and magic quickly enveloped Snails. "Hey!" screamed Snails. "Put me down! Raindrops, HELP!"

"NO!" yelled Raindrops. "Somepony, stop him!"

The unicorn scooped Snails onto his back and, holding him fast, ran at the pile of rubble.

"Help! Raindrops! Miss Cheerilee! Mr. Greengrass! Help me!" yelled Snails. But Cheerilee couldn't get away from the big pony, Greengrass was still sizzling from the blast, Raindrops was too slow, and when Twilight ran up to help, the pony knocked her aside. "Help!"

"Hey!" An earth pony managed to push through the larger hole Twilight had cleared before Snails' capture. It was--Raindrops realized with an incredulous stare--not Carrot Top but Baron Max. "What's going on?"

"Help! He's ponynapping me!" screamed Snails. "Somepony help me!"

"Outta my way!" growled the charging pony.

Max reacted instantly--by springing off the top of the rubble, landing in front of it, raising his hooves and punching the charging pony in the face. The charging pony staggered backwards, almost dropping Snails.

Raindrops almost cheered. Yeah!

The running unicorn shook himself off, then blasted Max at point-blank range with a beam of energy. This did knock Max back, and Raindrops could smell the stallion's burned coat from across the tracks, but as the abducter ran past, Max hauled himself up and seized his hooves. "Stop!"

Raindrops smiled grimly and kept going. Little more... almost got him...

The abductor kicked Max in the head and managed to wriggle free of his grip, but Max hauled himself back to his hooves and tackled the pony before he could take off. Snails fell off the pony's back with a thump, and then the two were wrestling. Raindrops flew above their heads and began to dive down. "Here's some payback--"

The enemy blasted a sphere of magical energy, shocking Max and sending Raindrops crashing to the track. The enemy got up, dragging his back right leg slightly, and appeared to be considering another attack... but Greengrass was getting closer, and Raindrops could even hear shouts from down the hallways and the trampling of ponies covered in heavy armor. The pony gave one quick look around, then ran at the pile of rubble, blasted through the top, ran past Carrot Top, and was gone.

"Hah!" The weathermare turned to see Cheerilee finally land a solid blow on her opponent, striking him at the base of his horn and causing him to stumble backwards and howl in pain. "Your friend left! You're all alone! So give up now and tell us where all the missing ponies are!"

The pony only growled in response, but he glanced around and seemed to notice that his ally had vanished. His horn glowed again, and he pointed it straight down. Cheerilee managed to leap back just as he blasted the ground under his own heavy boots, using the explosion to catapult himself down the tunnel. He landed past the rail doors, crashing into the ground but getting up without apparent injury, and then blasted the ceiling when Cheerilee moved to chase him. The door slammed shut, and Cheerilee was forced to stop in front of the massive door. His hoofsteps sounded down the tunnel for a few moments, but soon faded.

They were both gone, Raindrops realized. The Elements were safe. and so--Raindrops saw with relief-- was Snails. Her brother was sitting up next to Max, shaken, yes, but seemingly unhurt. "Snails! Are you okay?"

"I bumped my horn." Snails pressed a hoof to the base of his horn, rubbing it. "But it's not bad. I'm okay."

"Yay," said Max, lying flat on the train tracks.

Raindrops couldn't help but smile in relief that Snails was going to be alright, though this was tempered by a blast of anger at the ponies who had attacked them. "Okay. We can work with that."

Carrot Top climbed through the hole in the rubble. "What happened?" she asked. "Who was that?"

The ponies all looked at each other, and then Greengrass spoke. "I think I speak for all of us when I say... that we have absolutely no idea."

Author's Note

So now we see how Max fights--he just absorbs a bunch of blows and hangs on and keeps going until the other guy runs out of gas, or in this case, drops his hostage. It's not so much fighting as enduring, but for a mountain-themed pony, I think it's fitting.

Corrupted Officials

Archduke Fisher took a long, slow breath before he permitted himself to look back up at Captain Armor. "You're sure," he said. "An attack at the train station."

"Guards heard explosions and crashes coming from the freight tunnels." Armor spoke with military precision, enuciating each syllable carefully. "When they arrived at the main freight track, they found that it had been heavily damaged by blasts from some kind of explosive spell. A train engine and a crane were also destroyed. It'll take a few days to get everything fixed up."

Fisher looked out through his office window over the city of Canterlot. Down below, distantly, he could see the Guards and civil police scurrying around on their patrols, passing between the innumerable other ponies who lived and worked and played in the city. Amongst those other ponies were two mafiosos and one sun cultist, three incredibly dangerous individuals who could annihilate large portions of the city if they so chose. And he, Archduke Fisher, the Minister of War, the pony responsible for protecting all Equestria from any sort of armed attack, had no idea where they were.

"We don't think the culprits escaped via train. The rails were so damaged that no freight trains can enter or leave until they are repaired. As such, they're likely still in the city." Armor paused. "What would you recommend, sir?"

"Ths is absurd," the Archduke muttered.

"Sir?"

"The Guards have been patrolling all morning. They raided a dozen suspected mafia hideout locations. They pulled in something like thirty potential informants. And we have nothing!" Fisher slammed a hoof against the window. "We've failed so far, and those criminals just blew up Canterlot station!"

Armor hesitated. "Sir. We have recaptured nine of the twelve escapees--"

"Gnats, all of them. The mafioses and that insane cultist Soleil are the important ones. And we have failed to make any progress in finding them whatsoever!" Fisher's eyes narrowed. "Was anypony killed in the train station attack?"

"Not as far as we can tell. Some ponies were slightly injured--it seems they tried to stop the escape--but are all expected to recover. Those we found include Duke Greengrass, Dame Cheerilee--"

"Wait. The Element Cheerilee?"

Armor paused. "Er, yes. Three of the Elements were down there."

Fisher slowly turned to stare at him. "The mafia just attempted to kill the Elements of Harmony. Is that what you're telling me?"

Armor was silent for a moment. When he spoke, it was with a slightly strained voice. "Assuming the mafia was behind that attack, yes."

"The Elements almost killed--and on our watch!" Fisher pounded a hoof onto his desk. "The Elements, Armor! Our one defense against Corona! If the mafia escapees had succeeded, we would have had nothing left to stop the Tyrant Sun from entering Canterlot and burning the city to the ground!" He looked around the room, then levitated his armor--black-and-silver gear developed by Fisher Armor and layered with so many enchantments that it was nearly impossible to destroy without a cannon--up off the wall. His warhammer floated out of its case to his side. "No! I refuse to allow that to happen. We're redoubling our efforts. I will personally lead the search, and we will find those criminals, those terrorists if we have to tear the city apart to do so!"

"Sir, we've raided every location the Shadowbolt on this case gave us--"

"The Shadowbolts are useless! None of the locations they gave us led us to either the Lucas or Soleil! We're done with them." Fisher shook his head. "And we have no more time for niceties. If the Elements die, Equestria dies... and if the mafia has brought us to this point, they have only themselves to blame." He was silent for a moment. "I am declaring martial law."

Armor's mouth dropped. "Sir, I protest--"

"I have no choice!" roared Fisher. "The Elements must be protected at all costs--which means their attackers must be stopped as soon as possible." He turned back to the window. "The police will be drafted into the Guard, and every available unit will go to areas with concentrations of mafia ponies and search house by house until they find them. I will lead my personal security team to find Soleil. My bodyguard, Volk, has been searching in the city and recently telegraphed me that we have a tip. Any questions?"

"Sir, that's... we can't do that. We'll be leaving the city open to any other criminal--"

"No criminal in the city is as important as these, Captain. They just tried to destroy Equestria's only defense against the Tyrant Sun! We can hold off on chasing Banksy or Flanksy or whatever the idiot-of-the-day graffiti artist's name is, until later."

Armor frowned. "That isn't all we do, sir. If there's a mugging, a theft, a brawl--"

"Captain Armor, I will say this once. We evidently cannot protect everything at the same time. That should be clear enough, given what almost happened. We have to choose what is more important. Now, to me, it seems self-evident that keeping alive the only ponies who can protect us from a psychopathic alicorn who wants to incinerate us all and rule over a land of fire and ash is rather more important than chasing the conventional criminals."

The Archduke paused for a moment. Though he was looking at Armor, what he was seeing was a burning nation--burning because the Elements had died and the Tyrant was free to ravage the land. He saw the cities of Canterlot, Moscolt, Stalliongrad going up in flames that could no longer be quenched; he saw the ravaged survivors hauled away in chains to be the slaves of the mad sun goddess forevermore. That is the alternative, he thought. That is what will happen if I refuse to do what must be done. I cannot be squeamish now.

Armor's voice brought him back to the present. "Sir, I feel I must inform you that I don't believe our current situation merits--or legally permits--you to declare martial law. Princess Luna would not approve--"

"She is not here. When she returns, you may protest my actions however you like. In the meantime... I will do what must be done. Specifically, I am ordering you, as the Minister of War, to devote every resource you have towards finding the Lucas. Every. Resource. Viscount Shackles, whose police forces are under my command for the duration of martial law, will receive identical instructions. Now, as for other orders: you're to shut down the train station--"

"What?"

"And all other forms of transportation out of the city. We will not permit the Lucas to escape. Furthermore, use any legal means you can to keep ponies in their homes and out of the streets. I don't want the Lucas escaping into crowds; I want them stuck in one location, which we will sniff out. Finally, given the circumstances, you are to cast your special protective shield over the castle as soon as I leave. If those terrorists are willing to attack the knights, they may well be willing to attack our seat of government. I don't think I need to tell you how devastating a bomb in, say, Viceroy's Night Light's quarters would be." Fisher gave a sharp nod. "Are we clear?"

Armor paused. "We're clear, but, sir, aren't you... worried, that the Princess will think you went too far?"

Fisher gave Armor an incredulous look. "Worried? Captain, do you consider yourself a brave pony?"

"What?"

"Answer me."

"I suppose--"

"Why? Because you're willing to risk your life fighting for the nation? Well, should I do any less?" Fisher turned towards the window. "The House of Fisher has defended Equestria since before Celestia's insanity. We are willing to bear any risk, any hardship, in order to do what must be done to protect us all. You would give your life for Equestria? So would I, and I would gladly spend it exiled from the Court, or even incarcerated, if that was the price it took to save us all. If I knew that Luna, for whatever reason, would order me stripped of my title and jailed for the rest of my life should I give these orders--I would give them anyway, for the greater good." He shrugged. "But I do not think Luna will be offended. The Minister of War may legally declare martial law--"

"In a military invasion! In an emergency! This--"

"Is an emergency, as far as I am concerned," said Fisher. "I am doing what must be done. Captain, you may protest however you like, to whomever you like--when the Lucas are in custody. But for now, find them." He paused, then said, "Incidentally, about the Elements. It seems to me they are unsafe on the streets, and protective custody--"

"You still do not have the legal power to detain Knights of the Realm, sir, even under martial law. I will not order my Guards to do so, and I will have my Guards fight your Factory Security if they try."

Fisher raised a hoof in a placating manner. "I only meant to suggest we raise the issue at the next Court session--for situations like these. You have my assurance that I will not break the law here, Captain Armor." He paused. I can't hold them, but I don't want them anywhere near those insane prisoners. So... "But don't try to use them in the investigation. They are far too valuable to risk. I don't want them tagging along on raids or leading Guards units anywhere. Understand?"

Armor inclined his head and walked out.

When Armor was gone, Fisher turned to his desk. He felt weary, but not because he had been up for about twenty-four consecutive hours by this point. He was weary of having to deal with the fools and morons that seemed to infest every nook and cranny of the government. They prattled on about trivialities while the nation slipped towards war, towards a future of fire and flame, and while he stood in the breach they kept asking him to stand aside, take it easy, let things pass. When if it wasn't for him, they would all have died long ago.

It wasn't even the corrupt ones that bothered him anymore. Those like Greengrass and Blueblood would sacrifice the national interests to their own pocketbooks and power plays; they were a stain on the Court and Fisher would happily throw them from the Canterhorn. But that, at least, was something he could understand. It was ponies like Wallflower, Posey, and Max, who claimed to be incorruptible and selfless servants, yet would sacrifice the national interest to their own consciences, morals, and the 'law,' that Fisher was really starting to hate. If what was necessary for the nation required the sacrifice of a single common pony's interests or the violation of a single statue, they wouldn't do it, though the whole nation suffered the agonies of Tartarus five minutes later. Ponies like Greengrass could at least be bribed or threatened, but nothing could convince somepony like Max that he ought to take some action which he thought was immoral or illegal, even if it obviously would result in a better outcome for the nation as a whole. He and his kind would sacrifice the world for... a feeling of purity, Fisher supposed. Purity and nothing more.

We can't protect everything. We can't save it all. A noble must be able to determine what matters more and what matters less, and ruthlessly protect the former above the latter. Fisher thought back to the lessons that his father, Boris Splintsky-Fisher, had taught him at a young age. If you are not prepared to sacrifice your own personal interests to serve the public interests of the nation, you are not fit to rule. If you are not prepared to sacrifice what your subjects want for what they need, you are not fit to rule. And if you are not prepared to sacrifice the interests of a smaller group for a larger group, you are not fit to rule.

But nopony else understood. They didn't have the sense to understand! Even Shining Armor had shown up earlier that morning and had begun talking about some inane theory of Baron Max, that there was some kind of abduction ring in the city. Fisher found the whole thing both impossible--how could one group possiby locate twenty-odd petty criminals, some of whom had been out of the game for years, and capture them all without anypony noticing? Max was obviously deluding himself into thinking he had a chance to be a hero again--and far less important than recapturing the escapees they desperately needed to find. He'd thought he'd made himself very clear to Armor--they were not to chase ghosts; they were to find the dangerous escaped prisoners and subdue them. Now there was fresh proof of their danger: a bombed out freight line. And yet Armor still wanted him to sacrifice what was important for things that were less so.

Yes, thought Fisher as he picked up his enchanted warhammer. Priorities, that's all. Did he want ponies to be mugged, robbed, stuck in their homes? No, of course not. He hated that he couldn't help it. But finding monsters who were willing to attack the Elements of Harmony was more important than any of that. He would do his duty, find the criminals as soon as he could, save the Elements, and then restore Canterlot to normal as soon as possible. He would not allow himself to be distracted by any trivialities.

And he would attest to every act he'd taken to Luna with pride.

***

Carrot Top carefully put a cloth over Max's head. "There you go," she chirped. "How does that feel?"

"Wow." Max let out a long sigh of relief as his bruises started to fade. "That's amazing, Carrot Top. What's in that poultice?"

"Oh, just a few things I always carry with me." The mare smiled and turned back to her saddlebag. "You'd be surprised what kind of scrapes we get into."

They were resting in a small office just off the train station's concourse, which was now flooded with Guards in full battle dress running every which way. Somepony was alternately bellowing orders to the Guards and pleas for calm to the civilians. Carrot Top wanted to help, but the Guards who had found them in the freight area and had taken them upstairs had asked them to wait for further instructions. So, instead, she remained in the office and ministered to her wounded friends and Greengrass.

All in all, she thought, We came out of it okay. Max seemed to be the most hurt, with bruises on his barrel and his head where he had been kicked by the enemy, but even he wasn't badly injured. The worst of it was char to his coat from being zapped by the crane operator, but that was mostly cosmetic; he needed a haircut, not medical attention. Raindrops and Greengrass were also a bit ruffled from being hit by the energy blasts of the crane operator, and Cheerilee had some cuts where the mortar-blasting pony had bodyslammed her into the rail, but all of them were basically fine. Twilight was physically okay although somewhat shaken; Greengrass had wrapped her in a thick tarp for warmth before the Guards had reached the freight line, and she hadn't taken it off yet. And Snails, thanks to Max's timely arrival, was perfectly fine.

Carrot Top knelt by Max and applied another poultice to the bruises on his barrel. As the noble sighed in relief, Carrot Top said, "I'm going to bandage up Cheerilee now. But if anything starts hurting again, just holler, okay?"

"Got it." Max sighed. "You're a good healer, Carrot Top. Thanks."

Thanks for not mentioning how I gulped two glasses of wine in front of you last time we met. "Don't mention it!"

Across the office, Snails was lying down and playing with a few marbles that he had found in a desk in the office. Raindrops walked over and sat by him. "Feeling alright?"

Snails nodded. "Carrot Top gave me a leaf to chew, and now my horn doesn't hurt anymore." He paused. "But I swallowed it. Will the pain come back?"

"If it does, I'm sure Carrot Top can spare another leaf." Raindrops grinned. "Sorry you got hurt at all. I--"

"It's okay. I just wanted to see you being really awesome." Snails smiled for a moment, then lost it. "I mean, you're always awesome--"

Raindrops had a thought. "Sure... I was pretty awesome, wasn't I? But I'm sure you saw that I wasn't the very best fighter down there. Miss Cheerilee was going hoof to hoof with that big guy--"

"But you fought the other stallion!" said Snails. "You and Mr. Greengrass. And you were flying all around and dodging these big trains and flying under lightning bolts and doing all kinds of awesome stuff!" He waved his hooves in the air as he spoke. "You were so amazing and cool and heroic and everything. If you weren't there, Miss Cheerilee would have been squished by a train until she was half an inch thick!"

"Uh. Okay then," said Raindrops. "I'll take your word for it."

"You're really good at protecting ponies like me. Really really really really good." Snails held out his hooves to demonstrate how good Raindrops was. "You're amazing! And I want to be that good at something so I can be a good brother, and I'm not--"

"Snails, everypony is good in their own way--"

"But I don't want to be like everypony! You're the best sister ever, and I want to be the best brother ever. Not 'good like everypony' else. I want to be good enough that I've earned the right to be your brother. If I'm not as good at anything as you are at all kinds of things then..." He paused. "Then why do you keep me around?"

"Because I love you, and I still think you're a good brother." Raindrops embraced Snails. "You said earlier you'd trust my judgement and Miss Cheerilee's. Can't you trust me that you're a good brother?"

Snails shrugged and looked down at his hooves.

Raindrops hugged Snails and said nothing for a moment. Snails eventually said, "I love you, and I don't like feeling this sad, and I know I'm annoying you--"

"You're not annoying me It's been a rough day for all of us." Raindrops wrapped her wings around Snails. "But you do trust me and Miss Cheerilee?" She poked Snails head and elicited a giggle.

"Uh-huh."

"So here's what we'll do. When we get back to Ponyville, we're going to go up to your room, and I'll tell you everything about you that makes you special. Everything that's not like the other foals, that makes you a wonderful pony that I wouldn't trade even if Princess Luna offered to craft me a new brother from a star. From your memory, to your magic..." She flicked Snails' horn, and he laughed. "To everything else. Okay?"

Snails nodded. "That sounds good." He smiled. "I don't understand it now, but I know I'll get it when you explain it to me. Because you're awesome."

"You've got that right. And you're awesome too." Raindrops hugged Snails, and she saw that the foal was still smiling, and thus showing more happiness than he had since running off at the insectarium. She wanted to go play with Snails right that moment, to abandon their whole stupid quest to save criminal scumbags like Greengrass and Arnaqueur, and to take Snails back to their home in Ponyville in the most comfortable train carriage they had and do whatever it took to make her baby brother happy. She knew she couldn't, as they had to get debriefed, but she ached with that desire nonetheless. I am not staying one minute longer in this city than I have to. Forget what Cheerilee and the others say. I shouldn't have been distracted before. Snails is my brother. He is more important than donkeyspawn like Greengrass. The minute we talk to the Guards and tell them what we know, I'm gone.

"So!"

Raindrops turned to see Greengrass standing up and stretching. "Are we recovered enough to figure out what we're going to do next?"

"We're staying and getting debriefed," said Max from the ground.

"That might work for six of us. But one isn't supposed to be here."

Raindrops followed Greengrass's gaze to Twilight, who had just poked her purple head out from under the tarp. Wait... that's why he put her under the tarp. She's not in shock; he was trying to hide her from the authorities!

"You mean because she's supposed to be under house arrest?" asked Carrot Top.

"Oh, that's okay!" said Twilight. She seemed happy to have a problem she could actually solve, as opposed to being attacked by a unicorn the size of a carriage or having a magic-blocking ring stuck on her horn. "The Ministry of Corrections gave me a pass to go home and see my parents."

"Who told you that?" asked Greengrass.

"I got a letter about it. And today, Agent Sneak Attack arrived and said he would escort me home."

"Just to clarify, this is the same Agent that led you down into the freight tunnels, abandoned you, and put a defective magic ring on your horn that can't be removed, thereby leaving you alone and incapable of defense?"

"And he's probably the Agent who told everypony to stay out of the freight tunnels today," mused Cheerilee. "I knew that didn't make any sense to keep out the mafia, but if their goal was to keep Twilght in..."

Twilight's mouth dropped. "What are you saying?"

"Miss Sparkle, I'm afraid that 'Agent' was almost certainly not a real Shadowbolt," said Greengrass. "He was likely collaborating with those two ponies who attacked us down below. He led you down there so you could be captured. Why, I have no idea, but--"

"Wait. Not real? But... but my pass to visit my family is real, right?" Twilight leapt at Greengrass so their muzzles almost touched. "Right?"

"If it were, you would be expected and your disapperance would raise questions. I cannot imagine that it is."

"But that means... I violated my house arrest?" Twilight turned in a slow circle, looking at all of them. "But I--that's not fair! I did everything I was supposed to do! I stayed inside the library at all times except when I was with Trixie! I put up a magical ward so that I couldn't even fall asleep and roll out a window or something! I did everything--" She broke off. "I sent my family letters! When I learned I was getting to go home, I wrote them. They should know I'll be here! In fact--they wrote back! That proves they got my mail!"

"Unless somepony stopped the mail," said Greengrass. "It's not easy to break into the central post office and remove letters you don't want to reach their destinations, but it's certainly doable. Given Captain Armor's absence from this scene--unthinkable if he really did know you were coming on a train that arrived a few minutes before the train station was attacked--I'd say it's probable. As for any letters you may have received, they were very likely forged."

The unicorn blanched. "That's not fair!" she repeated. "I did everything right, and--"

"Twilight! Easy." Cheerilee smiled beautifically and pat Twilight on the back. "Nopony has seen you yet. We'll get you home, and nopony will be the wiser."

"Wait." Max had struggled up to a sitting position. "There's protocol on this. I had to memorize it for this Security Ministry I'm on."

"You're on a Security Ministry?" asked Cheerilee. "Aren't you a little... inexperienced?"

Max blushed. "I'm not quite sure why I'm on the Ministry, but I'm on it. And, according to the protocol..." He shut his eyes for a moment, as if looking up a memory. "If somepony under house arrest finds herself, through no fault of her own, to have violated the terms of her arrest, she must go to the nearest officer of the law and describe what happened. She will be detained and a hearing will immediately be scheduled--"

"Woah," said Cheerilee. "Twilight's a victim here. She doesn't deserve to be incarcerated while we wait for a hearing. Especially since that hearing likely won't take place until after the escapees are captured and the city settles back down... which could take days, or even weeks." She shook her head. "Twilight, Trixie taught you an invisibility spell, right?" Twilight nodded. "Okay. We'll get you aboard a train and back to Ponyville as soon as possible. That should satisfy everypony."

"That's against the law," said Max.

"So?"

"So, we have to follow the law." The Baron nodded his head slowly. "I'm a noble of the Court, and you're Knights of the Realm. We're supposed to serve Princess Luna. And after the Gala last summer she made it very clear that she does not approve of us deciding for ourselves when we can break the laws, even if we think we have good reasons. That's how the government becomes corrupt, and it leads to the common ponies suffering. Twilight, I sympathize with your position--"

"Clearly you don't," said Cheerilee. "Or you wouldn't be trying to jail her, knowing it will be days before she can even have the chance to show a judge she's done absolutely nothing wrong." She turned her back on him, then called over her shoulder, "Do you have any reasons why she should turn herself in, Baron, besides that somepony two hundred years ago wrote a law wtihout foreseeing this exact situation?"

Max frowned, but answered in a level, solid voice. "Sure. One--somepony just tried to abduct, or maybe kill, Twilight. She needs to be under armed guard, not going home on a train that's not defended by anypony. She might not make it home. Two--she saw the big pony who attacked her. She needs to tell the Guards about him; maybe she can give them a clue. And three--I'm sorry, Twilight, but I don't know you. You don't seem to have any proof that you were tricked here. For all I know this 'Agent' was some pony you were going on a date with. I can't let you go just based on your word." He paused. "What about you, Cheerilee? Do you have a reason why we should we break the law right now?"

"Because we know Twilight. We know she would never violate her house arrest!"

"So the laws shouldn't apply to ponies lucky enough to be your friend?" Max scowled. "Another pony in this situation would have to turn herself in, but not your neighbor? How is that just?"

"Um," said Twilight. "Cheerilee... I got fooled. It's on me. I'm willing to go to the Guards." But she was cringing beneath her cloak and obviously not thrilled about the prospect. "I mean, I wish it didn't have to be for days while we waited for--"

"No," said Cheerilee. "This is absurd. The government failed us at every opportunity. The Court was useless when we needed them. Now it's failing again, because it is obviously unjust for Twilight to have to suffer more just because she was fooled by criminals the government has thus far failed to stop!"

"Maybe we'd have had better luck stopping them if you had worked with me instead of running off like crazed vigilantes!" Genuine anger flashed in Max's eyes, and Cheerilee took a step backwards. "I am getting tired of being kicked in the head every time somepony decides that their cause is so important that they don't need to alert the Guards or the police or any authorities!" He glared over at Greengrass, though why Raindrops didn't know. Did the Duke do something on his own that Max had to bail him out of? the weathermare wondered. Maybe that's why he lost his seat? But then why--

Her thought was cut off as Max continued. "If you had waited for me, I could have gone down there with you! I might have been able to enlist some Guards! We could have captured those ponies, and we definitely would have been better able to protect Snails?"

"If we'd waited Twilight could have been killed!"

"And me," said Greengrass.

"Yes, there might also have been some ancillary benefits, but still!" Cheerilee turned to Max. "When the Tyrant Sun wrecked our town with a zebra curse, the government left us to rot for days. I had to tell the foals in my class, my students, the ponies I am supposed to shephard through their youths, that their government had decided that they deserved to suffer in the remnants of a ruined, annihilated town." Her voice caught, but after a moment she went on: "When the mob showed up to abduct Dinky, when salamanders kidnapped Trixie, during every single disaster we've had, you and your Guards and your nobles have been useless. Why should we work with you? You don't deserve our trust!"

Snails was staring at the ponies wide-eyed. So were Greengrass and Twilight. Raindrops quickly moved over and enveloped Snails in a comforting wing. I don't know what to say. Cheerilee's right, the nobles are terrible, but Max did just save Snails...

"Oh, you'd rather I stayed out of it and left that little unicorn colt get kidnapped?"

"I'd rather you all start doing your jobs instead of--"

"HEY!"

Everypony turned to stare at Carrot Top.

"Please, don't yell. You're scaring Snails." Carrot Top nodded at the foal, who was peaking out from under Raindrops' wing. "And... and we all need to get along. We just got attacked, we don't know by who or where they'll strike next, and we need to find them. Can't we please stop fighting?"

"But--" began Max.

Carrot Top turned to him. "Baron Max, you're from Nulpar right? Your province wasn't represented in the Night Court until recently. So you didn't have much contact with the federal government?"

"Sure--"

"So the Court's problems never affected you. You didn't have to deal with the Night Court denying your town funds, or anything else, for corrupt reasons. None of your ponies tried to make it in Canterlot and failed because they didn't have any connections. Equestria's a great nation, but the government's done some bad things. We've suffered from those things." She held up a hoof. "I know you want us to work with you and follow your laws. I know you trust them. But from what we've seen of the government and the nobles, we don't have any guarantee that Twilight would be treated fairly, no matter what the law says. And we don't want her to be treated unfairly."

Max was silent for a long moment. "I understand that the government has problems," he said. "And that you have been wronged with the Court. I sympathize with your position."

Carrot Top nodded. "Okay. And Cheerilee..." she turned to her. "First of all, Max just got beat up helping Snails. Can you at least hear him out?"

"Yeah!" said Snails from under Raindrops' wing.

Cheerilee smiled slightly. "Of course."

"Max and the other nobles have resources we don't. If Max or the others can really get us a squadron of Guards to help us search for the abducted ponies and protect us, they can help us. Even if they can't, they have access to government records, reports, information. Don't we have an obligation to try to make use of that? For the victims, if nopony else?"

"If we could trust them. But I don't think we can. For instance, I talked to that old nag, Puissance, at the Gala. She's covering up studies showing her educational system doesn't do as well as she claims it does, she's--"

"She's not here," said Carrot Top. "Max is. He helped save Snails. He's been trying to track down the culprits here, just like us. Can you accept that Max, at least, will try to do right by us?"

"I..." began Cheerilee. Then, "Very well. You saved Snails at the cost of a beating, Baron Max. I'll trust you--if not the rest of them."

"Good." Carrot Top smiled. "Now--you have a good knowledge of Equestria's laws, right? Can you think of any legal way that we could avoid having Twilight turn herself in right now?"

"What?" said Max. "I don't want a loophole--"

"I don't mean a loophole." Carrot Top shut her eyes. "I admit I don't know much about the law. I'm just a carrot farmer; I'm not as worldly as either of you. I haven't dealt with criminals like most of you; I'm not good at this kind of thing." For a moment, she looked downcast. "I'm just a simple mare living simple dreams--"

"Your dreams include being able to shoot lasers from your eyes," said Raindrops.

Carrot Top blushed. "Mostly simple dreams, then. Anyways, I don't know much about law, but I still believe that Equestria is a great nation. I believe that Princess Luna, who has guided it for millenia, cares enough about her little ponies to ensure that Equestria's laws are not designed to hurt them. I believe that, if there is some situation in which following a law would result in a pony being harmed for no reason, Luna and her good nobles would protect them in the law." She nodded. "Cheerilee, is there any legal way we could avoid having Twilght be locked up awaiting a hearing that won't come for days or weeks, because the city is in chaos and mafiosos and abductors are running around and keeping the Guards busy?"

Cheerilee thought for several moments. "Yes. Just before the Fourth Great Griffin War, there were concerns that the griffin populace in Latigo were going to tax the resources of the police and Guards with nuisance issues. Violating minor laws, then turning themselves in as was required and thus taking Guards out of action for hours to handle the paperwork. So they passed a law... let me think..." Her eyes rolled up slightly, as if looking into her mind to find the right book. "In the event of a civic emergency, citizens who are legally obligated to turn themselves in for misdemeanor offenses or parole violations may instead wait for the conclusion of the emergency, at which point they must then turn themselves in to the regional authority as they would have if there were no emergency--provided a member of the relevant Security Ministry approves."

Carrot Top turned back to Max. "And you said you're on that Ministry, right?"

"I am." Max paused, chewing his lip. "But... look, if I do this and Twilight doesn't turn herself in within five minutes of the emergency ending, it's my neck. I'll be gone from the Court in five minutes."

"We're trusting you to be different from every other nobles we've dealt with," said Carrot Top. "Can't you trust us?"

Max looked around, as if seeking a mentor, then took a breath and turned back to Twilight. "Well... the Guards are all busy. There's no sign of the escaped prisoners. Ponies are missing from their homes. And I'm pretty sure half the train station just got wrecked by criminals. It's an emergency if I've ever seen one in Canterlot." He nodded. "I'll allow it. Twilight, you can wait until the end of the emergency--which I'm defining as when the Guards resume their normal schedule. That should be when the escapees and the ponies who did this are captured, or possibly sooner if we receive information they've left the city. That way, when you turn yourself in--which you will the moment the Guard patrols return to normal--there will be Guards who can set up a hearing right away. If you really are a victim here, you'll be processed and released as quickly as possible. Okay?"

"Thank you." Twilight bowed. "Thank you, Baron."

Raindrops let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding. "Glad that's settled."

"Me too." Carrot Top rumaged through her saddlebag some more. "Anypony want snacks? I'm famished."

Cheerilee laughed, and gradually the mood returned to normal.

"So," said Greengrass. "I'll ask the obvious question. Does anypony have any idea why someponies apparently decided it would be fun or profitable to scoop Miss Sparkle and I into a little box?"

"Did you turn in members of the mafia--namely, the ones that escaped earlier today--to the Court?" asked Max. "That's our current theory."

"No, I'm more the 'testified against' than the 'testifier' type," said Greengrass.

Cheerilee rolled her eyes at the Duke. "We checked the mob, Max. They didn't seem to know where the abducted ponies were, or their escaped bosses. They're as in the dark as us."

"But if not them, who?" asked Raindrops. "I mean, we know it's those ponies downstairs, but who are they working for, and why did they do it?"

Carrot Top shook her head. "No idea."

Greengrass turned back to Max. "You know, given how you seem to keep winding up in scenarios like this, I would imagine your investigative skills are... shall we say, finaly honed by this point? I'm sure you have some idea."

"You do this often?" asked Raindrops. "

"Just once before--and Greenmeadow, Greengrass's father, did most of the investigation." Max shook his head. "But... okay. I'll go over it again. We found three ponies missing today, all criminals that either got away with it, or cut some kind of deal with the government so they wouldn't go to jail for very long. In the missing pony reports I found twenty more ponies that fit that profile--criminals who basically got away with their crimes and then vanished in the past couple days."

"Twenty?" gasped Carrot Top. "That's..."

"More than we thought," Raindrops murmured.

Max nodded. "So, adding in the three we found, twenty-three missing total, plus attempts on Greengrass and Twilight. The only thing they all have in common is that they've committed serious crimes but didn't spend much, or any, time in jail--"

"Hey!" Twilight frowned. "I'm paying for what I did. I'm working in Ponyville, serving the community--"

"I agree with you, but the pony who just tried to smear us all over the freight track might not see it that way," said Max. "Somepony who doesn't know anything about you or the case might think that you got a good deal because of your father. And if they're unstable enough to be lobbing magic like that in an underground cave which could have collapsed on their heads, I'm guessing they're not stable enough to figure out why your punishment was just and fitting."

"Great." Twilight shrank down. "I'm stuck far from where I'm legally allowed to be, I can't use magic because of this defective ring, and an insane pony is trying to kill me." She paused. "I need something to distract me before I start panicking again."

Cheerilee said, "Why don't you try to work out what's wrong with your ring? You're an incredible magic scholar. I'm sure you can figure it out."

The ring sparked a bit, and Twilight's horn flickered. She tried to look up at it. "Yeah, that might work. Thanks." She sat down and, as a few more sparks shot out from the ring, began to work on the problem.

Max continued: "So that's the abductions. Then we have a jailbreak of two high ranking mafia bosses, the Lucas. Except the mafia doesn't have any idea where they are or what's going on with the abductions. But... they can't be totally unrelated. It's too unlikely a coincidence. And it's not like the abductions serve any other real purpose; the mafia performing them to help out their bosses is the only sensible explanation!"

Raindrops saw Cheerilee's face light up. "Oh!" she said. At the same time, Greengrass's eyes widened just a little, as if he'd had some insight. Raindrops frowned. Mind filling us in, you two?

Greengrass spoke first. "Well," he said, in the tone of a teacher trying to provoke a response from a student, "Couldn't the abductors just be random vigilantes who are mad at what they see as corruption in the government?"

"I guess, but they'd have to know they couldn't get away with it. Even if they're as strong as those ponies we saw down below, without support and resources from some big group like the mob, the Guards would be all over them..." he trailed off. "Oh. Oh. I get it."

"What?" asked Carrot Top.

"The abductions weren't performed to make the prison break easier. The prison break was done to shield the abductions." Max sprang to his feet, eyes bright. "Think about it. We weren't able to get any help from the Guards until the train station almost blew up, because they were pursuing the escapees. The abductors have had the run of the city!"

"Sounds about right," said Greengrass with a smile. Raindrops frowned; his smile looked oddly intense, as if he really cared that Max had made a hypothesis. There's something going on between these two.

"I'd go one step further," said Cheerilee. "What if the two ponies that allegedly escaped were actually captured by the abductors? Then the Guards would have no chance whatsoever of finding them--they're looking for ponies on the run, not ponies in cages--and so they'd remain distracted longer."

"Plus," said Duke Greengrass, "It's quite possible that those two bosses had also arranged some kind of deal. In which case, it isn't even an instance of the abductors performing another crime to mask the real one--only the same crime in a slightly different venue, with some additional benefits. It also explains how the jailbreak just so happened to occur on the same day that Princess Luna is out of town--prisoners wouldn't know her schedule, but the abductors have a pony who can impersonate a Shadowbolt. They might be able to learn it."

"Exactly," said Max. "It explain everything."

There was silence for a moment.

Then Snails clapped. "Wow! You're all really smart!"

Greengrass laughed. "It's good to be appreciated. So, what do we do now?"

"We tell the Guards and the police what we know, so they can start chasing the real targets," said Max.

"And we continue our own investigation," added Cheerilee.

Raindrops held up a hoof, then paused. Well, she can if she wants. Me, I want to get Snails home first. The Guards can take things from here.

Meanwhile, Max said, "So you'll be working with the government forces?"

"If the Guards can actually help--yes," said Cheerilee.

"Splendid," said Greengrass. "I know a few--"

"You aren't helping," said Raindrops.

Everypony turned to look at her. "What?" asked Raindrops. "Did anypony here seriously want him involved? He's a criminal. Send him home and let the real Guards handle this."

"Well, given what they just did to me, I think you can trust I am not some double agent, Raindrops," said Greengrass. "Besides, they just tried to kill me. I now have an eminent interest in burying them all."

Raindrops rolled her eyes. He really has the gall to sound affronted at that. "I don't care. You're a selfish, entitled bastard who only cares about your own self interests. If you had been walking past the freight track and seen a random pony getting attacked, you wouldn't lift a hoof to help her."

"Raindrops--" began Max.

"No. I'll trust you, Max, because you saved Snails when you could have just stayed safely hidden. I'll trust you to help the investigation and find these ponies. But this guy?" She thrust a hoof at him. "He'll sit there and crack jokes and maybe even provide some useful advice, and then when the work is done, he'll use whatever he learned to blackmail and manipulate and destroy everypony involved. Because he doesn't give a damn about any of the abducted ponies or anypony at all besides himself. He just likes playing his games. That's why he wants to investigate--because he thinks it'd be a game! He's only still here, instead of hiding at home, because he wants to play. Elements, Greengrass, and Max versus Abductors. And if we start winning too easily, he might even switch to the other team just to keep things interesting. So, no. He's not helping."

Greengrass blinked. "Given the dearth of resources at your disposal--"

"I agree with Raindrops," said Cheerilee. "Greengrass, thank you for helping to save Twilight. We appreciate it. Now, your services are no longer required."

The noble turned to Max. "Mounty... you know me better than they do. What do you think?"

Max was silent for a long moment. Then: "Greengrass, I'm sorry, but I'm with the Elements on this one. I like you, but I can't trust you about something like this. Not after what happened last fall."

"But I..." Greengrass trailed off. "After all, the governing officials of this nation are expected to participate in such actions as are necessary to secure the piece--"

Max shook his head. "Greengrass, honestly, I'm sorry. But I can't disagree with them."

Nopony spoke for almost a full minute. It was Greengrass who broke the silence with a little shake of his head. "Ah, well, I'll return to my garden then. Come along, Miss Sparkle. You can stay with me until the emergency is over."

"What?" asked Raindrops. "Why would she do that?"

"Do you have a better option?"

Raindrops paused. The Guards would detain her anywhere else, unless Max goes with her to explain the civic emergency thing... and he's got to help us investigate. He can't escort her around all day. "But..."

"Incidentally, any progress on the ring?" asked Greengrass, before Raindrops could continue.

Twilight looked up. "Well, I think the ring is somehow using my own magic to stick to my head and block me from actively casting. If I can just get into an anti-magic field or interrupt my magic for a moment, it should fall off."

"As it happens, I have some plants that could be used for that purpose." Greengrass looked at the others. "Unless there's objections?"

There were none.

"Very well. I'll go back home and continue preparing to endure what I've been assured will be the worst day of my life so far."

"What?" Max frowned.

"Oh, yes. I have it from quite a reliable source. Today will be worse than any other in my life up until this point."

"What about that day you resigned from all your committees in the Court?" asked Max.

"Well--"

"And were abducted by terrorists? And were stabbed in the barrel?"

"Busy day," commented Cheerilee.

Max continued: "You were almost killed by the Sun Cult, almost sentenced to death for high treason, and you lost your best friend, your power, and your games. How could today possibly be worse?"

"Well, today does sound ominous when you put it like that," said Greengrass, earning a chuckle from all those present. "But in any event, if the rest of today will be similarly terrible, I must get ready." He glanced out of the office and saw that the Guards had moved away from the door and were momentarily distracted by a heated discussion with what looked like a castle messenger. "Come, Miss Sparkle. Now's as good a time as any."

The Duke left the office. Twilight lingered a moment, thanked the others for saving her--and Max one more time for not having her arrested immediately--and pursued.

"Right." Max sat down. "That went... as well as could be expected, I guess." He shook his head. "Where are the Guards to talk to us? They should be here by now."

Carrot Top looked outside the train station. Several officers were arguing by the ticket counter, and some seemed to be trying to close it off. "I think they'll be a while."

"What did Greengrass mean when he said you knew him?" asked Raindrops. Where are the Guards? Hurry up and interview us so you and Max can take over and we can go home! "I wouldn't think an honest noble like you--at least, I assume you're honest--would associate with scum like him."

"Neither would I, honestly. But he roped me into his schemes last fall, and since then, we've been..." Max paused. "I don't know. Associates."

"What scheme?" asked Cheerilee. "Does it have to do with the stabbing-terrorists-treason day?"

Max smiled. "I can tell the story. But... fair warning. A lot of this was what Greengrass told me, so it might be--"

"Complete lies?" filled in Cheerilee, and everypony laughed.

The Elements and Snails settled against one wall as Max began to talk. "So, after the Grand Galloping Gala, Greengrass was pony non grata in the Court. He had his seat, but nopony would associate with him, because everypony knew Luna despised him. There were rumors, total nonsense but some ponies didn't know it, that she would fire anypony caught being too friendly with him. So... well, he couldn't keep advancing like he had been, even if he did the work for it. Nopony would dare give him any prestigious assignment, or acknowledge anything he managed to accomplish. I didn't know him well then, but when I saw him in the hallways I could tell he was miserable."

"Aw, he couldn't play games with pony's lives anymore," drawled Raindrops. "My heart bleeds for him."

"I'm not saying to feel sorry for him." Max hesitated. "Here's what happened. He wanted to do something big and prestigious so that Luna couldn't help but acknowledge his merit, or she'd look hopelessly biased and unfair. He and his secretary, a mare named Notary, came across a Baronetess who was in the city who was apparently trying to work with Corona. Some kind of crazy plan to tunnel into the castle and wreck the Court or something. Greengrass decided to expose her, so he and Notary began investigating--but before Greengrass got the proof that he wanted of the Baronetess's corruption, the Baronetess and her lackies captured Notary. And they were full blown Sun Cultists, so Greengrass got scared that they would kill her."

"Corona wouldn't like that," said Carrot Top. "We've met her and she's not trying to kill us all anymore."

"Well, nopony told the Baronetess. Anyways, Greengrass couldn't just go to the Guards because he didn't have enough evidence to go up against another noble. He couldn't go to the press because then the Baronetess would kill Notary immediately. He couldn't go rescue her himself because he didn't know where the Baronetess was keeping her. And when he tried appealing to the nobles that could issue emergency directives to find the cult headquarters and have it searched..."

"Nopony believed him," said Raindrops.

"Or they thought he might be telling the truth, but were afraid to be seen working with him in case it was a lie. Either way, they wouldn't help, and he tried everypony. He even went to a formal ball he wasn't invited to in order to ask the viceroys and Luna, which didn't work; when he tried Fisher later, he offered all kinds of concessions, but didn't get anywhere. Nopony was willing to help him." Max looked down.

"He asked you, didn't he?" asked Cheerilee.

Max slowly nodded. "Yeah. I was his last resort. But I didn't believe him either." He sighed. "I... I was wrong then. Notary was indeed captured, as best I can tell."

"But she's okay," said Cheerilee. "She came by Ponyville a while ago. What happened?"

"To cut a long story short, Greengrass got himself abducted by the Sun Cult through a gambit that involved him giving up his political power in the Court," said Max. "The Baronetess of Opelick dragged to their base to interrogate him and see what he knew--which, as it turned out, was exactly his plan. Once he was there, he escaped, freed Notary, and began setting off the explosives the Cult had stockpiled." Max shrugged. "Meanwhile, since I suspected what was happening, I tried to find Greengrass before the Cult killed him. Greenmeadow--Greengrass's father, used to be on the Court, was in town trying to get Greengrass to stop shaming the family name and to be a better pony--helped me. He knew a Diamond Dog named Wolfgang, who followed Greengrass's scent. We trailed him to the Cult's location. After that..."

"What exactly did Greengrass do to get abducted?" asked Carrot Top.

Max paused. "Do you mind if I don't talk about it right now?" After Carrot Top nodded, Max said, "We found their hideout, which was already on fire. We fought the Cultists who came out and tried to take hostages in the neighborhood. That's where the whole 'kicked in the face' thing comes in--one of the cultists tried to run to a playground to barricade himself behind foals, and I restrained him until Greenmeadow beat him down with his cane." Max rubbed his face as if it were still sore. "The Guards followed us to the Cultist hideout, raided it with us, and helped us save Greengrass just before the last Cultist standing would have killed him... at which point he was arrested for high treason, since he was in the Cultist hideout and thus, in the opinion of a nearby Guard, probably part of the Cult.

"That's about it. Luna knew that Greengrass wasn't with the cult and let him out of prison, but she excoriated him for being a bad pony in general, and she refused to restore his influence or tell anypony it was okay to work with him. So he's still there, but he has little actual power now." He chuckled. "Ironically, Greengrass actually told me later he didn't think the Opelick ponies were even really working with Corona. The Opelick noble thought she was, but he thinks some third party imitated Corona and manipulated the Opelick noble just to sew some chaos and maybe trigger Luna's threat to dissolve the Court if any other nobles were corrupt. Doesn't know who, though. And it's all academic anyway."

"So the whole thing was pointless," said Raindrops.

"I wouldn't say that. Notary's alive." Cheerilee nodded. "I'm a... close friend of hers. I'm glad she made it out of Canterlot in one piece."

"We didn't find any sign of her in the hideout," said Max. "But I guess after being captued by terrorists, she was tired of her boss, left him, and found you?"

Cheerilee frowned, but then shrugged. "I'll have to ask her. Anyways... do you still talk with Greengrass?"

"We talk at least once a week. Now that I saved his life, he's gotten it into his head that he should mentor me." Max rolled his eyes. "Duchess Posey, she's the one who teaches me how to act in the Court. She teaches me how to do write bills, debate, even dress. I get ninety percent of my advice from her. Greengrass... well, he likes that whole 'trickster mentor' thing. Giving me scenarios and having me puzzle through them to work out what's going on behind the scenes, like he did a few minutes ago. Helps me figure out what to look out for from the other nobles so I can avoid their tricks. Honestly, though, I spend more time with his dad than with him. Greenmeadow likes to teach me too, but he's not too chatty--he just asks me what I've done in the Court, and if he thinks it's stupid, he hits me in the head with his cane."

"Ouch!" said Snails.

"Apparently, once you get old, you can do that," said Max. "Then again, I'm one of the only nobles he even talks to. I think it's a sign of affection."

Raindrops raised a hoof. "I'm surprised you associate with a criminal like Greengrass."

"Oh, he's not a criminal anymore. I've made it very clear to him that I will report on him if I catch him so much as jaywalking, and that if it weren't for Luna pardoning the whole Court, he'd already be behind bars. But as far as the Guards and I can tell, he went straight after the Gala--and seeing as how the whole Court, me included, did at least one bad thing before the Gala, I'd be a hypocrite to want a second chance of my own but shun him anyways. Also, after a thorough investigation, it turns out he didn't even break any laws during the debacle with the Sun Cult. Now he just gardens, invests in some local businesses he likes, and... well, and talks to me." Max shrugged. "That's his life."

Raindrops said nothing to that. But she thought, No. He did horrible things. It's not hypocrisy to shun him from polite society, even if he did one single good thing too. If he had his way, Snails and I would have been homeless after that party curse. I don't care if you think he's repented, Max, I'm not forgiving that stallion. She looked around. Where the Hay are the Guards? I want to get out of here already!

They were all silent for a few moments before Max spoke again. "Anyways. If there's a takeaway, it's this: I'm not saying Greengrass is a good pony. He was selfish through and through, and he didn't care who he hurt. Me, his father, Luna... he didn't care about any of them. But I'm not saying he's all bad either; he risked being killed, even being labeled a terrorist to save Notary's life. He gave up everything else he wanted for her."

"What are you saying, then?" asked Raindrops.

"If you're facing Greengrass, and his back's to the wall, be careful. He likes to joke, but he can be very dangerous when he's got nothing next to lose."

"We'll keep that in mind," said Cheerilee.

Max opened his mouth to say something else when the office door banged open and a Guard came in. "You need to leave," he said.

"But--we need to talk to Captain Armor or another officer," said Max. "We have important--"

"By order of Archduke Fisher of the City Security Council, the train station is being temporarily closed until the mafia escapees are arrested. You need to leave."

***

"Do not fear!" Archduke Fisher yelled. He was standing atop a platform with Captain Armor, Viscount Silver Shackles, and several other officials. All were dressed in their uniforms, except for Fisher, who was wearing black and silver armor that crackled with magical energy. A massive warhammer floated just behind him. "We will arrest the escapees! Every single Guard in the city is on the task, so it will be completed soon! And, once it is completed, you may resume your usual activities--in safety!"

Raindrops ground her teeth. The Elements, Snails, and Max were in the large crowd that had been chased out of the train station, and were watching Fisher with the rest of them. "That idiot! What's he dong now?"

Fisher waved a hoof at the train station. "Transit via train, chariot, and airship will be temporarily suspended to prevent the escape of the infamous Luca brothers, as well as Soleil Supreme, the only three prisoners still at large. Canterlot Castle will be sealed as well." He gestured at the castle, over which a large pink shield was appearing. "You need not fear terrorists or criminals attacking our government! However, for your safety, we request that all citizens remain indoors until the emergency is lifted..."

"What?" hissed Raindrops.

Snails clutched Raindrops' leg. "Raindrops, I wanna go home..."

"I know. We'll figure something out." Raindrops had to restrain the urge to fly up and deck Fisher in the face. Okay. This is insane. But we can go to Luna or the Viceroys and--no, wait, the castle's locked down. Argh!

The weathermare turned her head to see her little brother. The colt was looking up at her with big, nervous eyes. Raindrops knew that he was worried, and was still upset about the teasing he'd received earlier. Damn it! We were supposed to be done with this! Talk to the Guards, get them on the right track, and have them find the villains! That idiot Fisher is ruining everything!

She wanted to go home with Snails. She desperately wanted to get him into his safe bedroom, away from Canterlot and all the chaos it had been through in the past several hours. But now she didn't even have the option of escaping. Criminal scum! If my brother gets hurt, I might just let the vigilantes kill you! And Fisher better hope I don't get my hooves on him--

"Now what?" asked Carrot Top. "We're not going to get any help from the Guards."

"We have a lead," said Max. "The jail. If the jailbreak was planned by the vigilantes, they'd need to know the jail schedules so they could know when to break out the Lucas. Probably the fake Shadowbolt; he might have been able to bluff his way in. Captain Armor got me a meeting with the jail guards, so I can talk to them. You're welcome to come with."

"There's also the way the big pony escaped," said Cheerilee. "He blasted down at his own hooves and used the explosion to get away... but I didn't see his horn glow when the explosion hit the ground. So he wasn't casting a shielding spell on himself. Which means that blast should have shredded his legs unless he had very powerful boots. Industrial strength."

"So we can investigate the boot companies. See if any massive ponies got some massive shoes recently," said Carrot Top.

"And also," said Cheerilee, "There's one other thing. Greengrass mentioned that somepony might have interfered with the mail. We should look into that, see if anypony's been skulking around the post office."

"I'll take that one and the prison," said Max. "Can you three look into the boot stores in town?"

"Yes!" said Carrot Top. "Happy to help!"

"Alright. Now--we're working together, right? Then let's meet back here in two hours." Max paused. "That should be enough time for our investigations. Okay?"

"I promise," said Cheerilee. "Raindrops?"

Raindrops realized she was clenching her jaw. "Yeah. Sure." She forced herself to take a breath. "Let's just go."

The ponies ran out into the city, quickly vanishing into the mobs of scurrying ponies.

Author's Note

Flanksey, of course, refers to the amazing story "Exit Through Canterlot." (Although, for obvious reasons, this is just a joke reference, not something seriously implying that Octavia is a graffiti artist in this universe. She's got enough to do, playing for Luna as she does. No graffiti for Tavi here; she'll stick to music.)

You'll find out more about what the Baron did to be Castigated for in Talon&Thorn's story "Climbing the Mountain." I left it a bit vague here to avoid spoilers.

The Puissance thing is a reference to AtGGG and my favorite part of that story, the Cheerilee/Puissance dialogue. Cheerilee is fun when she's politely mocking jerks.

The 'third party' in the Opelick thing could be a possible changeling reference, if we want. I'll leave that open.

I didn't have room to describe Greenmeadow more here, but I see him as someone who was perhaps a bit too nice/soft on Greengrass, saw how that turned out, and is overcompensating by being very critical of others (like Max) from now on. But he does have genuine affection for everyone's favorite Baron from Nulpar.

(Incidentally, Greenmeadow's cutie mark is a dot--that is, a period, the thing that ends a sentence. His special talent is 'finishing things'. He can walk into a room with a half-written bill and ten squabbling nobles and bang out the finished bill in an afternoon. He's just that awesome. Greengrass's mother, Greenheart, has a '!' as a cutie mark. Her special talent is making things exciting and fun. Or possibly doing factorial problems in mathematics, but probably the former option.)

Greater Good

Raindrops' already low spirits had worsened still as they tried one boot store after another, only to be met with clueless clerks and managers who had no useful information. As they approached the fifth store, she groaned out loud. "Do we really have to go in here?" she asked. "I hate these guys."

"I can take the lead instead," offered Carrot Top. "You could stay outside."

Cheerilee shook her head. "Raindrops needs to come with," she said. "She's the best at being intimidating."

Carrot Top said nothing, but nodded her head.

"Would it help if I gave you a hug?" asked Snails, still riding on Raindrops' back. He had started out walking, but the Elements had climbed up and down several levels in Canterlot since beginning their search for information on armored boots, and the foal had quickly tired. "Here!" And he hugged the back of Raindrops' neck.

The weathermare managed a small smile. "Thanks. But I still don't want to go to--"

"The last clerk said only the Guards might have boots as strong as the ones we're talking about," said Cheerilee. "And Fisher Armor is the Guards' biggest supplier of gear, including footwear. So if that boot really is Guard-grade, FA probably sold it. And if that's true, then the manager at their local store is our best bet for information."

"We don't have the boot, though," said Raindrops. "At most we'll get a bunch of model numbers, one of which might be the boot in question."

"And maybe a customer list. Maybe even customer cutie marks--if the boots are really being marketed as Army supplies, they're only allowed to sell them to buyers the Court vetted for security. And if that's the case, we should be able to get names, marks, addresses, and anything else we need." Cheerilee shrugged. "It's the best idea I have."

"Right." Raindrops began to trot a little faster and tried not to think about it. Fisher's one of the bastards who left our town to rot. That we're crawling to him for help is... She couldn't finish the thought. Let's just do this.

Fisher Armor (Retail) was a moderately-sized building on the upper levels of Canterlot. As the Elements approached it, Raindrops noted how the entire district seemed shut down. Bars, boutiques, and bodegas alike were closed, and the streets were almost empty of everypony except for marching soldiers. Above it all loomed Canterlot Castle, surrounded by a thick pink bubble and patrolled by what looked like a hundred Royal Guards. Notices plastered to walls 'strongly recommended' everypony to stay indoors except in case of emergency. "This is really creepy," said Raindrops.

Carrot Top managed a smile. "We'll fix it. We always do."

As Raindrops approached Fisher Armor, she saw that it, unlike most of the rest of the district, was still open. A pony stood in front of it wearing armor similar to Fisher's, and at her side floated a jeweled sword with etchings of strange metals. Carrot Top and Raindrops hesitated for a moment, but Cheerilee just marched right up. "Excuse me," she said, going for the door.

"Appointment only," growled the pony.

"Appointment?" Cheerilee smiled. "I'm sorry, it seems you weren't informed. We're the Knights of the Realm--"

"So? I'm the Grand Poobah of the Marshmallow Islands. No appointment, no entrance. Archduke Fisher's orders."

Cheerilee's smile grew razor-thin. "I didn't finish. We are the Knights of the Realm and we are here to pick up our armor before embarking on a very dangerous mission in defense of Equestria. Archduke Fisher has already given his approval."

The guard blinked. "But... an appointment is--"

"I'm sure you've read Fisher's opinions in the newspapers about the importance of keeping us Elements safe," said Cheerilee in a prim voice. "He believes that we should be monitored by round-the-clock surveillance, that a Night Guard battalion should be encamped within Ponyville, and that we should be required to travel with armed escorts when we leave the North Everfree--or, preferably, that we be locked in a secured underground bunker except for when we need to fight the Tyrant Sun. He said this all at the Grand Galloping Gala, remember?" Cheerilee's eyes narrowed. "I'm sure you can imagine his opinion on whether we should be denied access to his Armor--which, as he's said so many times in so many press releases, is the very best in the land--before going off to battle the Tyrant Sun and her legions of minions."

Legions? thought Raindrops. She's enjoying this too much.

The guard was starting to sweat. She glanced at Snails, who was sitting quietly on Raindrops' back. "But you have a foal with--"

"Agent Ento Moligist has already put on his disguise, not that it's any of your business. Let us in. Or do you want us to be go battle the Tyrant Sun without armor?"

"But... but..." The guard took a hesitant breath. "What mission?"

"You don't need to know that. Princess Luna and Archduke Fisher agreed it was to remain confidential." Cheerilee let out a soft sigh. "With the Tyrant Sun's spies everywhere, especially today of all days, why would you want me to spread state secrets in the street? Unless you're one of them?"

"No!" snapped the guard. "No, ma'am!"

"We'll see about that. Right now, it seems all you're doing is obstructing the business of national security." The teacher's smile vanished entirely. "Now are you getting out of our way, or do I need to go find Fisher and drag him back here to authorize keeping the Elements safe?"

They were let in.

Cheerilee snickered as soon as the heavy door had shut behind them. "And that, everypony, is why you don't rule a company based on fear or intimidation."

Snails climbed up so he was peaking over Raindrops' head. "Sometimes we fear that you'll assign too much homework."

"Well, that's not the same thing--"

"Woah." Raindrops held up a hoof and gestured to a display. Several sets of boots were sitting there... including one that looked approximately like what the pony on the tracks had been wearing.

"Jackpot," said Carrot Top.

***

"I'm sorry, Baron, but I'm just not sure how much I'll be able to help you."

Baron Max forced himself not to get up and start pacing through the warden's living room. Hangem Higher, the pony in charge of Foalsome Prison, was an older pegasus with graying hair and a drooping mustache. Max had seen him a few times before and had thought that he looked energetic and powerful despite his age; he had moved with short, brusque motions that radiated a sense of purpose. Now he just looked limp and tired as he slumped on his divan.

"I was hoping to talk to you about the jailbreak," said Max.

"I've already told the official investigators everything I know." Higher sank deeper into the divan. "I've been in charge of Foalsome for eight years. We've housed pirates, foreign mercenaries, insurgents, even that monster that attacked the Grand Galloping Gala last summer. Nothing like this ever happened until today. I thought I was doing a pretty good job. Guess not." He sighed. "I just don't know what went wrong. That's what I told the investigators, and that's all I've got for you. Sorry."

"I'm taking a slightly different tack than the investigators." Max leaned forwards a little so that he was at about the same height as the warden, a tip Posey had taught him for making ponies feel comfortable. "Warden, Foalsome Prison is relatively large, yet only about a dozen prisoners escaped. How was the jailbreak targeted?"

"Somepony cast a massive energy blast at the wall of the prison building, near where the Lucas and a few others were at the time. The pulse knocked a big hole in the wall, and the prisoners fled into the courtyard. Another pulse knocked down part of the outer wall. By the time we could muster any guards and block the holes, a dozen prisoners had gotten out."

Max nodded. "The mafia ponies left very quickly. So they were probably already awake, even though the jailbreak happened very early this morning."

"Because they knew about it and were ready, I would assume."

"That's one possibility. Another is..." Max trailed off, then said. "Let me ask you something else. Where were the prisoners? If they were just in their cells, I imagine they'd normally have been asleep."

Higher paused. "Well, no, they weren't in their cells. They were in a meeting room."

"Why?" asked Max, even though he had a pretty good idea of why.

"I... look, I"m not really supposed to go into this..."

"Unless Princess Luna or the Night Court has declared this a classified matter," said Max, keeping his voice calm yet firm just like Posey had taught him, "You have an obligation to provide me with the information I need in this matter. I'm on the Canterlot Security Ministry, and this pertains directly to the city's security." He paused for empahsis. Now, after the legal stuff, add a personal remark, just like Greengrass told me... "I need you to help me make this right, Higher. So everypony in this city, from the oldest senior citizen to the littlest foal, is safe again."

Higher was silent for a long moment. When he spoke, it was with a tired voice. "The government had been trying to flip the Lucas ever since they were arrested. Mareio Luca has contacts in a lot of the griffin kingdoms, including a few that the Shadowbolts think might be leaning towards siding with Corona. But Mareio wanted a get-out-of-jail-free card for that information, and one for Manetelli too, but Luna refused. She said she wouldn't let somepony who hurt Equestrian civilians go free to hurt them again, even in exchange for information that could help her manage the army."

"What changed?"

"Mareio made one of the prison gangs angry. Suddenly, he was a lot more amenable to a more reasonable deal. Ten years, medium security, for him and his brother, in exchange for his information. He and his brother were meeting with Equestrian lawyers to work out the plea deal when the attack happened." He raised one hoof, then dropped it again. "Look, I know. I should have known they would use the plea meeting as a chance to escape. I--"

"I don't think that's what happened," said Max. "Who else knew about the meeting?"

"Just me, a few staff members, the lawyers, and a supervising Shadowbolt."

Aha! "A Shadowbolt was there?"

"Yes, since the deal involved a matter of national security. Why?"

Max took a shot in the dark. "Would this happen to be an Agent Sneak Attack?"

"Why, yes." The warden paused. "How did you know that?"

The same one who brought Twilight up to Canterlot. At least his alias is consistent. "How did you know he was a real Shadowbolt?" If I can figure out how he falsified his identity, I might be able to track him. If he had an actual pony back him, maybe that pony's in on it too. If--

"Princess Luna told us."

Max's mouth almost dropped. "What?"

"She came by the prison and told us she was taking a personal interest in the case, because... well, because of the national security thing, and because she wanted to make sure we didn't just let Mareio and Manetelli walk away without paying any penance to the Equestrians they hurt. She told us that Agent Sneak Attack would be overseeing things, and that, since he'd spent several years working on Shadowbolt-level crimes--you know, criminals that kept evading the regular Guards for years and years, the really smart and really well-connected ones--he was just the right pony to have."

Max said nothing. He was staring off into space.

"What?" asked the warden.

We knew it was absurd that the Shadowbolts would officially try to capture Twilight and the others, so we assumed it was an imposter, thought Max. But what if it was just a rogue? A Shadowbolt who spent a lot of years chasing criminals he couldn't get any legal evidence on--or who managed to catch some but had to watch as they made a plea deal and got a reduced sentence--so he gave up on the law and took a shortcut by becoming a vigilante. In fact, I'll bet he was familiar with every one of those ponies I looked up earlier--they were all in the police records, they all had long and storied criminal careers, the Shadowbolt who was focused on Canterlot crime would know about them! He shook his head briefly. "I apologize. Can you tell me anything more about Sneak Attack?"

"Just that he always seemed very busy. He did good work, mind you; I never got the impression that he was letting prison affairs slide. But he always seemed to be doing so many different investigations."

That doesn't really help... wait. If he was just some random vigilante, he might be able to devote his whole life to this. But if he had a real job with the Shadowbolts, how much time could he steal away? He'd be noticed if he vanished for too long. And that means... yes. Cheerilee and Greengrass guessed that the vigilante was blocking Twilight's mail, but they thought he'd be doing it by sneaking into the post office to monitor the Ponyville letters. Now, if Sneak Attack was this busy, he wouldn't be able to monitor the post office 24-7. He could have one of the other conspirators do it, but they'd probably be noticed. Or...

Or he could have her mail redirected. He could file a notice with the postal service saying to send all of Twilight Sparkle's mail to another location so it could be checked; the postal service does that for criminal investigations, and they wouldn't question a Shadowbolt. But send it where? If the address was fake, or so far away it required more postage, the redirected mail would just be returned to Twilight as undeliverable and she'd know something was wrong. If it went to a real pony, that pony would wonder why Twilight was mailing them. But if it went to one of his own addresses, that could be a clue!

Max rose. "Thank you," he said. "You've been a big help."

"Is there anything else I can do?" Higher rose as well. "I want... if there's any possible way, I want to make up for this."

"There is. Gather as many off-duty prison guards as you can who are willing to help me arrest some dangerous criminals."

"The Lucas?"

"Those who broke them out," said Max.

The warden's eyes shown for a moment, but then he said, "Everything's shut down, even carriages and chariots. My ponies live all over the city. It'll take time."

"Do it as fast as you can," ordered Max. "Have them gather at the train station. I'll meet them there if I can, or leave instructions for how they can help me." He allowed himself to smile. "We're gonna get these guys," he said. "I promise."

Higher nodded. "I'll do whatever I can."

***

"No," said the regional manager of Fisher Armor in Canterlot, after the Elements had sat down at his desk and refused to leave until he answered their questions. "It's impossible. We've never sold a single one of those boots."

Raindrops raised an eyebrow. "Are they on display for artistic reasons?" Snails gave a soft giggle, and Raindrops smiled at her brother. Then she said, "Why would you have them if they don't sell?"

"They're just a prototype. They--look." The manager's horn glowed and the boots slowly floated, in fits and jerks, over to the Elements. Raindrops noted how the manager was sweating profusely by the end. "They're supposed to be the greatest armored boots in Equestria--and they are. Problem is, they're too heavy. The weight-reduction spells didn't work."

Raindrops tried to lift the boot up. She could, but it took much more effort than she would have thought. "So they're here..."

"In case we get the odd pony who is strong enough to be able to use them. So far, we haven't. We likely won't sell any until they fix the problem, which shouldn't be for a few weeks." The manager shook his head. "So I'm afraid it's quite impossible that the pony you're looking for had them."

"He did," said Cheerilee. "I fought that pony long enough to know."

"Ma'am, we do have some similar boots--as do our competitors."

"I took a picture," said Snails suddenly. "Will that help?"

The manager frowned. "A picture?"

Raindrops was stunned for a moment--and then grinned. I thought he was trying to use telekinesis to throw rocks at the bad guys--but he was photographing everything instead with that spell Trixie taught him! "You can remember, what, three pictures at once now?"

"Three!" Snails actually looked a bit happy. "And I wanted to remember how awesome my sister and Miss Cheerilee were, so I took all three!"

"I believe you said the pony was obscured with some sort of magic spell," said the manager. "If that's true, I can't imagine the 'picture' this colt--"

"My brother," said Raindrops.

"Yes, brother, is clear enough to prove that our boots were used in such an act."

Raindrops shut her eyes so she didn't burn the other pony with her gaze. All he cares about is Fisher Industries not getting blamed in the papers for this. "Surely," she hissed, "It wouldn't hurt to look."

"Oh!" gasped Snails. "Even if the pony is blurry, I have a picture of the ground after Miss Cheerilee chased that pony away, and--"

"And if we see how much damage the iron rail took, we can see how strong the boots would need to be to let that pony survive the blast!" finished Cheerilee. "Very good, Snails!" The foal grinned from ear to ear.

"Can you show the image, Snails?" asked Carrot Top.

Snails nodded. "Miss Trixie showed me how."

"Wait," said Cheerilee. "That takes a kiss, I thought, and--"

But Snails was already starting to cast. His mouth moved a bit as if he were mouthing magic words, and his horn sputtered up and cast a greenish glow. A few moments passed. And then, slowly, a hazy image flickered into existance between the Elements and the manager. It showed a bewildered Cheerilee and a destroyed track, with a hemisphere of iron rail and concrete foundation blasted out of existance. It was like a bomb had been dropped in the middle of the track.

"Could any boots besides your prototypes survive that?" demanded Raindrops.

The manager scrutinized the image carefully, his green coat slowly paling. "I... I mean, yes, granted, that's a lot of damage, yes, most boots wouldn't provide protection, but after all this is just an image, it could be altered, the foal could have made a mistake--"

"Look," growled Raindrops, "First of all, ponies tried to kill us and our friends. Second of all, we have the right to approach Luna at any time and petition her about anything. Third, Luna takes a real dim view of obstruction of justice, especially when it relates to attempted murder."

"I appreciate that, but--"

Raindrops stood in one quick motion, then knelt, placed her hooves under the manager's desk, and lifted. The businessstallion gaped as the weathermare slammed it into the wall and shattered it. I am officially done with all of this! "Fourth. Lives are at stake, and we're out of patience. Tell us everything you know. Now."

The manager sagged back into his chair. "Alright, I know of no other boots besides the model you pointed out that could enable a pony to take a blast like that at his hooves and survive--but I tell you, we haven't sold them! We couldn't get rid of them as a gift! Except for a few of Fisher's Factory Security guards, I can assure you nopony has worn them." He frowned. "And all of those ponies are back in Stalliongrad, guarding Fisher's factories. The ones in the city have the lightweight models--sleek and strong. There isn't a single pony in this city who has bought these boots."

"Was anypony recently removed from Factory Security?" asked Cheerilee. "Anypony that was strong enough to wear those boots, and might have come here after being let go?"

"I don't know. You'd have to ask one of them--"

Cheerilee was already halfway to the door. She returned in a moment with the pony from outside. "Let's ask her, then."

That pony hesitated after hearing their story and their questions, but responded once the manager urged her a few times. "Well... the only one I know of that was fired recently was Goliath. He headed up security for Fisher Mining; they develop drill bits, mining carts, blasting spells to punch into mountains. Things like that. But..."

The Elements exchanged a glance at the mention of blasting spells.

"But he couldn't!" the Factory Security pony said. "He wouldn't have been able to put together any kind of plan to lure a pony somewhere to hurt them. Don't tell anypony I told you this, but.. Goliath was kind of a charity case."

"Archduke Fisher doesn't believe in charity, except for suitably 'meritorious' ponies," said Cheerilee. "He thinks it diverts resources from the strong to the weak."

"A tabloid made that quote up," said the armored pony. "But that's not how I meant it. Goliath was... 'slow'. He thought like a foal; he couldn't understanding any kind of complexity or nuance. A smart foal, sure, give him instructions and he could do them; give him a spell and he could learn it, but when it came to making his own judgement of something? No way. Either he'd just take whatever somepony gave him, or he'd come up with something really simplistic."

"I'm waiting to hear why he was head of security," said Raindrops. "Since that job would seem to require, you know. Judgement."

"Like I said, he was great at following instructions, and that was what Fisher needed. Goliath patrolled, he carried out orders, and if he had to fight somepony, he was incredible. You know how some fighters freeze up against certain opponents and start worrying about whether they can win or whatever? Goliath never did that. If Fisher told him that 'ponies who sneak into the factory are bad', then he knew they were bad, and he threw them out. Add that he was one of the best fighters Fisher could find, and his qualifications were obvious."

"You do realize how exploitive this sounds," said Raindrops. "I hope."

"Goliath had a better life, more important work, and a larger salary than he'd have gotten anywhere else. How many ponies would hire somepony with the judgement of a foal? Would go through the laborious process of training them? Would--"

"I believe we were discussing why he was fired," said Cheerilee.

"Besides," said the pony. "He was also a legacy. His big sister is in charge of Factory Security, she oversees the guards at all of Fisher's properties, and--"

Raindrops stared. "Big sister? Bigger than what, a zeppelin?" Goliath was huge! How can his sister be even bigger? Was that family half-giant or something?

Cheerilee coughed. "Why was Goliath fired?" she repeated.

"It happened just two weeks ago. Fisher had a new facility erected last year for his mining research. Sixteen days ago, it collapsed. Apparently the contractor used substandard materials and bolted with the extra bits. Nopony was hurt or killed, since it happened at night, but Goliath took it hard."

"Because Fisher had convinced him that the mining company was Good, so if it was hurt, that was Bad with a capital B," muttered Raindrops. "And, like a foal, he doesn't understand nuance. Terrific."

"I'm guessing that contractor had done that before?" asked Cheerilee.

"Yes, actually. We found out later. How did you know?"

"Lucky guess."

The guard shrugged. "Goliath began acting erratically. He attacked another employee who had some sort of assault charge in his past--twenty years old, he'd been a model citizen since, but Goliath didn't care. Just kept roaring that criminals are 'Bad' and should be punished. Volk, Fisher's bodyguard, had to separate them. Fisher placed Goliath on leave, and Goliath vanished. But... he should have returned all his equipment."

"I guess he didn't." Cheerilee stood. "We'll be sure to mention that to Luna, along with all the rest of it."

"But--"

"I think we can take it from here," said Raindrops. "Seeing as how your lot hasn't exactly been terribly useful so far in stopping this mess."

The Elements turned to go. Behind them, the manager rose. "Hey, weren't you getting armor?" the pony asked. "At least let us outfit you--"

"On second thought, I don't think we want to have anything to do with Fisher Industries," said Cheerilee.

"But--"

"Oh, one more thing," the teacher added. "It occurs to me that, if this Goliath is caught, the world will learn that a Fisher-trained employee using Fisher equipment and resources attacked thirty or so ponies, including three Knights of the Realm, a noble, and a foal, all while Fisher pranced around and sent the Guards running in circles looking for escaped prisoners that had nothing to do with anything. That might be bad publicity for Fisher. In fact, it might destroy him" She smiled, but nopony in the nation would think that smile contained any fragment of kindness. "You might want to think about the possibility that Goliath is a little smarter than you thought. That he knows that what you did to him, taking a pony with a mind like a foal and turning him into some kind of war machine, was unfair and wrong. And that he's figured out a way to take all of you down."

The manager's mouth dropped. "But--"

"Just think about it," she said, and left the store. The other Elements and Snails followed.

***

"Thank you," said Max, gulping down the coffee the postal clerk had provided him. The Canterlot Central Postal Repository had mostly shut down due to the civic emergency, but one junior employee had been made to stay behind to keep the doors open. The employee, Priority Mail, was a short filly with a tannish coat, a soft yellow mane, and a postal scale as a cutie mark, and she'd been as accomodating to Max as she could possibly be. Namely, she had provided him access to the titanically volumous postal redirection instructions, which contained every change-of-address and other 'don't use the listed address, send it here instead' notice for the last fifteen years in an order that might as well have been random. She had also provided him coffee. Which, having been running around for most of the day, excepting the part when he'd been beaten up by a criminal, Max sorely needed.

It was ironic, the Baron thought, that lives might come down to his ability to get through the postal paperwork, given how much he had once hated the stuff. He had determined easily enough that a redirect had indeed been issued for Twilight Sparkle's mail one week ago, such that all letters sent from her to her family would instead be sent to an address in the city. But he'd guessed that there might be multiple layers of redirects, and--after fifteen minutes of searching--he was proven right, as he found the instructions for that address insisted that all arriving mail sent by Twilight Sparkle should instead be sent to a third place. That took another fifteen minutes of painsakingly searching through the book, and then there was a fourth address, and so forth. An hour had passed, and Max was still at the table.

If they write a ballad about this, he thought, This is the part where they'll cut away to something more interesting. He smiled ruefully. But I never give up, and I'm not starting now.

The fifth redirect sent Twilight's letters to 392 Silly Smile Street. Mailing instructions for that address were not listed under 'Sil' or 'Smi' or even 'Str.' It wasn't listed under its neighborhood or its district. Max flipped the pages, forcing himself not to give up. Poise under pressure, Max. Just like Posey says. "Priority Mail, do you have a street map? I think this one might be filed by building name. At least, that's the only other thing I can think of."

Priority Mail came over with one, as well as a fresh cup of coffee, which he gulped down. "You know, in all seriousness, your coffee might save dozens of lives today."

The clerk blushed. "I didn't know it was that good..."

Max found 392 Silly Smile Street in the atlas and noted that it was the Peppy Pony Party Store. Looking back to the redirects, he saw nothing under 'Pep' or 'Pon', but under Party, he found it. Mail from Twilight Sparkle, redirect to...

He paused. "Um, Priority Mail? This address is just 'Gate 19 Below.' What street is that?"

"It's not a street. 'Below' means the loading docks and airship bays beneath Canterlot itself. They're technically in another mailing zone." She turned a page in the street guide. "Below the lowest level of the city--there's a path down the Canterhorn."

"Pretty big docks," mused Max, looking at the map. Wait... that might be big enough to hold all the abducted ponies! Using just one facility would make it easier to avoid detection, so maybe he's been redirecting Twilight's mail to the same place where he's got his base of operations and all his captives! Unless... "Where would I find a redirect for those in these instructions?"

"We don't do automatic redirects from Below. A company courier has to redeliver the mail to us for those facilities. But we haven't had anypony like that come in for at least a week--it would be in the records if they had. So--"

So this is the end of the line! Max sprang to his hooves. "Thanks!" He dashed for the door. "I'll make sure to give you credit later!" he yelled as he vanished into the streets.

Priority Mail watched him go. "I guess it was really good coffee," she decided.

***

Cheerilee had wanted to race off and find Goliath right away, but Carrot Top had pointed out that they didn't know where he might be hiding. Reluctantly, she had agreed to go back and rendezvous with Max.

"Did you really mean that Goliath might be trying to take down Fisher?" asked Carrot Top as they stood several meters away from the train station.

Cheerilee shrugged. "Honestly, I don't know. If Goliath is as foal-like as they say, he might not be able to think of consequences like that. One of the other ponies--the Shadowbolt or the one in the crane, assuming they aren't the same--is probably the mastermind and is just using Goliath for muscle. But we should keep the possibility in mind."

"Do you think Fisher might be--"

"Behind this?" Cheerilee asked. "I'd love to take him down, but honestly, there's no way he's responsible. He would never have tried to kill us in the tunnels. He wants us imprisoned in a secure vault, not dead. No, he's not behind this. He's made some terrible decisions--especially today--but he's not one of the vigilantes."

"Well, that's something." Carrot Top frowned. "Actually, about the vigilantes... do you think we can beat them? Especially Goliath?"

The teacher was silent for a long moment. "With enough time, yes. I'm faster than him, and even he can't take unlimited hits. I could take him down if I had an hour to pick away at him. But if he has hostages..." She trailed off. "Well, we'll think of something."

"Maybe Max will come back with a bunch of reinforcements," said Carrot Top.

"I hope so, but I doubt it." Cheerilee shook her head. "Fisher has them chasing the mob and the Sun Cultist. Trust me, when this is over, I'm Approaching the Hay out of Luna and telling her what I think of her War Minister."

"I'll be right beside you," said Carrot Top. "Speaking of that--any thoughts on formations for when we go after Goliath? I could be right besides you, or even take point." She smiled. "I'm happy to help."

Cheerilee hesitated. "Um... actually, I was hoping you could help in another way. The criminals were strong enough to take down mafia thugs. Even if we can beat them, we'll probably get hurt. If you can mix us up some healing potions..." she trailed off as Carrot Top's face fell. "What's wrong?"

The farmer was silent for a long moment before sinking to her fetlocks. "Sorry," she said. "I know I'm not as good in a fight as you and Raindrops--"

"Hey." Cheerilee sat next to Carrot Top. "You'd be helpful if you came with to help us beat up the criminals too. Honest. It's just, we don't have your herbology skills--"

"And I don't have Raindrops' martial arts, or all your experiences running around the country, or even Max's hard head." Carrot Top sighed. "I'm sorry. It's just, I'm feeling kind of useless. I haven't been good for anything all day, and even the mafia wasn't afraid of me. Maybe Luna knighting me was a mistake--"

Cheerilee put a hoof over her mouth. "You," she said, "Are an industrious, dedicated, incredible mare who has done as much for Ponyville and your friends as any other one of us." She quirked a smile. "And if I have to sit you down right next to Snails and explain this to you, I will. Carrot Top, you're an important member of the team. It's just..."

It didn't seem to have an effect. Carrot Top just sighed and said, "Right now, it's better for the team if I hang back and work on the healing potions." The farmer nodded. "I'll do it, don't worry. I just wish I wasn't so useless compared to the rest of you--"

"You're not."

As the two talked, Raindrops sat down with Snails a few feet away. "That was a great spell!" she told her brother, for about the fifth time. "I could see everything! It's like you've got a camera in your eyes!"

"I know," said Snails. He sounded faintly proud, and even a little pleased--not as much as Raindrops would have liked, but she would take it.

"See? You said earlier that you weren't good at anything. But this was a great one, right there!"

Snails nodded.

"So... now you get that you're a wonderful little brother and you're exactly what a sister as awesome as I am deserves, right?"

Snails nodded, in the manner that Raindrops knew implied partial agreement.

"What?" asked Raindrops. "Why don't you agree?"

"No, I do." Snails took a long moment to speak again. "I'm just worried."

"About what?"

"If I'm only good at things like bugs and memory spells. Cause they don't come up a lot." He paused. "Raindrops? When we go home, can you help me figure out when the things I'm good at are really important and matter all the time?"

"Of course," said Raindrops.

Snails smiled--a truly happy smile, the first Raindrops had seen since he'd fled the Insectarium. And Raindrops embraced him

"Knights!" She looked up to see Max galloping into the empty square. They were the only ponies in the usually-crowded open area in front of the train station, excluding two dozen Guards standing in front of and just inside the station itself. It was, Raindrops thought, a frankly creepy feeling. "How did your investigation go?"

"We think we know the identity of that pony shooting those magic bombs at us," said Raindrops. "Goliath. Used to work for Archduke Fisher."

"And we already know about the fake Agent Sneak Attack," said Carrot Top. "That just leaves one that we know of--the one in the crane. Assuming he's not the Shadowbolt."

"I'm pretty sure Sneak Attack's a real Shadowbolt." Max thrust one hoof towards the end of a street. "But more importantly--I think I found their base. I think the bad guys are hiding in Gate 19 Below; it's one of the airship docks. It's where Twilight's letters to her family were forwarded, and it's big enough to hold all the prisoners."

"Shouldn't there be an airship there?" asked Carrot Top.

"No," said Cheerilee. "Not if it's away. I'll bet anything that whatever airship is supposed to be using that dock is on a trip halfway around the world by now."

"Anypony coming with us?" asked Raindrops.

Max sighed. "I have a stallion rounding some up, but I guess they aren't here yet. The public transportation and carriages are all shut down--"

"We don't have time to wait." Cheerilee's voice brooked no argument. "For all we know, Goliath and his partners could be getting ready to kill their prisoners right now. We have to go."

Max looked pained. "But--"

"She's right, Max," said Carrot Top. "We can't wait."

The Baron was quiet for a moment. "You're right," he said at last. "I just wish there were some other way so that, when the guards I found get here, they'll know where to meet us."

Carrot Top held up a hoof, then trotted to one of the Guards outside the train station. "I'm Carrot Top, Knight, and I have a favor to ask. Could you please keep an eye out for..." She looked back at Max. "How many?"

"About a dozen prison guards."

"A dozen prison guard-type ponies, and if they come to this square, tell them that Baron Max and the Knights went to Gate 19 Below?"

The Guard glanced at another pony, one wearing officer insignia, who nodded. "They're the knights," she said. "We trust you. We're not allowed to leave our posts, but we'll pass along a message, if that will help."

"It will," said Carrot Top. "Thank you." She walked back to the group. "Anything else?"
'
"Yes," said Max. "Dame Raindrops. Your brother."

Snails hugged Raindrops, and she hugged him back. "Just a little longer, Snails," she said. "Then I'll spend all the time in the world with you, if you want."

Snails managed a smile. "I know. Beat up some more bad guys, okay?"

"I promise."

"Where can we leave him?" mused Cheerilee. "I doubt the daycares will be open. Max, do you have any friends who might be willing to let a foal like Snails stay with them for a little bit?"

"Most of them are in the castle, which is blocked off." Max frowned. "The rest... honestly, I'd worry that, if something did happen, they wouldn't be strong enough to protect Snails."

Raindrops groaned. "Please tell me we have some option besides taking Snails into a battle against a Shadowbolt, an explosives expert with the mind of a foal, and that crane operator maniac."

"Well," said Max. "We do have one other option."

***

"I hate this option," said Raindrops.

"Relax," Cheerilee said. "We were planning on making a pit-stop here anyway."

"Why in the world of Equestria would we do that?" Raindrops demanded.

Max just smiled at the banter and opened the warehouse door.

Greengrass was waiting for them by the time they reached the bottom of the steps. "Ah, hello!" he said. "Save the day yet?"

"Working on it," Max said. "We were hoping we could leave Snails with you."

"'Hope' isn't quite the right word--" Raindrops stepped down the stairs and looked around. She hadn't expected all the vegetation. "Woah."

"Yes, beautiful, isn't it?" If Greengrass was bothered by the Elements being in his garden, he gave no sign of it. Instead, he raised a hoof and swept it across his plants. "Flowers from all corners of Equestria, carefully tended to in order that they reach their peak of beauty. Marvellous, if I say so myself."

Snails headed down the stars after Raindrops, smiling up at Greengrass. "Mr. Greengrass, can I stay with you for a little bit? My sister has to go save the world."

"Of course," said Greengrass. "Go have fun. In fact--I think I saw an albino bumblebee hovering by that patch of fire lilies over there."

"Wow!" Raindrops couldn't help but grin as Snails scampered over, heedless of Greengrass's calls to stay on the path. "Thanks, Mr. Greengrass!"

Cheerilee descended to the basement. "Where's Twilight, Greengrass? She was supposed to be staying with you."

"She should be in the garden shed." He turned and raised his voice to call, "Miss Sparkle? Your friends wish to check on you!"

A door on the western wall of the room opened and Twilight poked her head out. The sparking ring was still around her horn. "I'm fine!" she yelled. "Just working on making a potion to lower my magic enough to get this ring off! Herbology's not really my strong suit, but I'm sure I'll get it in a few hours!"

Greengrass turned back to the Elements. "Anything else?"

"Yeah." Raindrops flapped her wings and moved right in front of Greengrass's face. "Look, we're pressed for time, so I'll make this quick. You hurt my brother, I'll make you wish you were back with the Sun Cult. Got it?"

The Duke beamed. "Of course. I--"

Raindrops shot a hoof out and slammed it against his mouth, forcing it shut. "This isn't a joke," she hissed. "Lose the grin. Now."

Greengrass seemed unperturbed. "Why, Raindrops," he said, once the mare had removed her hoof. "You mean you haven't forgiven me after all this time? Baron Max has, and--"

"You might have fooled him, but you won't fool me. I haven't forgiven or forgotten any of the horrible things you put us through." Raindrops' eyes blazed like fire. "You broke Octavia to get to Lyra, and you almost wrecked both of them. You sent two con artists at Carrot Top to get her to work for you. You put Trixie through Tartaros just so you could wrangle political advantage from her. You're a bad pony, and bad ponies like you don't change and don't deserve forgiveness."

"Well, at least I never maimed a friend of mine at flight camp," said Greengrass in a breezy tone.

Raindrops had to take a few moments so as to avoid decking the pony. "That's different and you know it," she growled. "I did one bad thing and changed. Your whole life is bad."

The Duke's smile faded. "Is that so?" he asked.

"Yeah. It's so. So I won't appeal to your better nature. I'm speaking your language, Greengrass, and that's to say: if Snails gets hurt, I will make you suffer. Are. We. Clear?"

"Of course, Dame." Greengrass gave a theatrical bow. "I solemnly swear I will not let any harm befall your brother. I promise."

"You'd better not," said Raindrops.

Max trotted over. "Actually, Greengrass, I think you've changed quite a bit."

"Really?" said Greengrass, almost airily. "I don't."

"Raindrops, we might be able to provide Snails with another chaperone for a little while longer," said Cheerilee. She turned to Carrot Top, who had entered the garden last. "Does this look like it will work for you?"

The farmer was gazing at the plants with a look of wonder. Her unhappiness seemed to have been washed out by the sight of the gorgeous garden. "Oh, yes," she whispered. "This is a fantastic selection."

"Selection?" Greengrass frowned. "This is not a flower shop."

"No, but we were hoping you would allow Carrot Top to use some of these plants to make healing potions," said Cheerilee. "Seeing as how all the shops are closed. Also, she could try to make a potion to help Twilight. If she could get that ring off, she could really aid us against the abductors."

Raindrops blinked. "How did you know those flowers might be usable for that?"

"Oh, I dated an alchemist for a while," said Cheerilee with a faint grin.

Greengrass, meanwhile, looked incredulous. "You want me to let you tear up my garden? Why would I do that?"

"Because we're asking nicely?" drawled Raindrops.

"I suppose I could refuse you in the politest of ways. Would that help?" Greengrass smiled. "A few hours ago, you were too good for my help. A few minutes ago, you threatened me. Now you come back on bended knee and expect me to provide assistance? What's in it for me? If I help you, will you tell Luna I've achieved redemption and should retake my seat on the Court?"

Max trotted in front of the Elements and said, simply, "Greengrass, lives are at stake."

"I fail to see why I should not obtain at least some benefit--"

"And I seem to recall how you felt when your secretary's life was at stake, and nopony would help you because they thought it was more important to make sure Princess Luna didn't get mad at them for working with you, and that Notary's life was trivial compared to that. Is that what you're telling the Elements now? That a few flowers and some favor are more important than the potions that will keep them alive?"

Greengrass said nothing for a moment. Finally, he managed, "That's a bit low, don't you think?"

"Hey, Posey taught me how to be noble. But you're the one who taught me that 'noble' doesn't always mean 'nice.'"

The noble sighed. "Indeed I did. Well played. You may harvest as you please, Dame Carrot."

Carrot Top grinned and immediately ran into the garden, squeaking like a foal at Hearth's Warming Eve. Greengrass turned back to the Knights. "Well? You've availed yourselves of my secret hideout and my plants. What else would you like of me?"

"Nothing for now, but we'll let you know if we change our minds." Cheerilee turned to Raindrops and Max. "That's everything. Carrot Top and Twilight will catch up when they can, but for now..."

"We have lives to save," said Max. "All the ponies that were abducted--Fetlockson, Duty Enpay, Arnaqueur, the mafia escapees, and the rest. Let's save them."

Raindrops shut her eyes. I could refuse. I could say that I won't go, that I'l stay here with Snails. That I won't put my life at stake to save criminal beasts.

"Raindrops?" asked Cheerilee. "Are you ready to go?"

She looked back at her brother, who was gazing at a big bug crawling up a flower stem. No. I'll go, because I have to. But they'll pay for this. The vigilantes and the rest of them. "Yes," she said. "Let's go."

***

A few miutes after they left, a thin, lanky mare peered out from within a neighboring alley. After looking around for a few moments, she ducked back inside and cast a spell.

"Stompina," Clubby Hoof said. "I heard everything. The Elements Raindrops and Cheerilee plan to attack the ponies that have our bosses. They're going with some noble of the Court I've never heard of. They left the little brother behind in a warehouse with Carrot Top, that Greengrass pony that got turfed from the Court six months ago, and Night Light's daughter, Twilight Sparkle."

Back in his base, Stompina grinned. "Good. Very good."

"Shall I continue tailing them?"

"No, there's no need. We'll get them to come to us."

"Huh?"

Stompino turned to her thugs. "Go to the warehouse. Capture everypony inside, especially the brother and the other Knight. Got it?"

The thugs nodded.

"Good." Stompina chuckled. "We'll let the Knights do all the hard work of freeing our bosses. Then, we'll just tell them that, if they want their Snails and their Carrot Top back, they'll give us the Lucas and help them get out of town. And if they don't believe us..."

She grinned and took a heavy sap from her desk.

"Well, then we have a little fun."

Flowering Talents

"Ooh! What are these?" Snails scampered over to a few big plants with the reddest flowers he'd ever seen. Several ant-like bugs were crawling over their stems, poking them with feelers as if massaging them. In response, the flowers vibrated slightly and seemed almost to be trying to dance. "I've never seen anything like them!"

"These flowers?" Greengrass trotted up behind Snails. "Let me see... why... that would be the Zaldian Primrose. Do you like them?"

"I meant the bugs!" said Snails, extending a hoof for one of them to crawl onto it. "I've never seen them before. They're like ants, but they have five sections, not three, and their antenna are too long." He gasped. "Are these magic bugs?"

Snails hadn't really wanted to talk to anypony, hoping instead that the others would just let him be while they did important adult things and he tried to figure out what he thought about the events of the day. The others had indeed left him alone at first, with Miss Carrot Top making healing potions, Miss Sparkle putting together some bundle of plants under Carrot Top's supervision to get the ring off her horn, and Mr. Greengrass tending to a flower patch halfway across the garden. Snails had thus been by himself, and he'd taken the opportunity to sit down in a corner and try to think. But then Twilight had squeaked because a spider had crawled into her mane, and Mr. Greengrass had laughed and given an explanation as to why that spider was very good for gardens like his, and he'd known so much about bugs that Snails hadn't been able to resist asking him about some others in his garden.

Greengrass laughed. "Why no! That bug there, on your hoof, is Roseanne the Rose-Ant. You see, Rose-Ants have a symbiotic relationship with the Zaldian Primrose. They stimulate the rose's energies with their antenna, as you see there, and they feed off the flower's nectar. Neither can exist without the other."

Snails quickly shook the bug he was holding so that it slipped off his leg and landed back on the flower. "That's really cool," he said. "Are there other bugs that are symbi-thingies with other flowers?"

"Certainly. I could show you a few more if you like."

"I'd like!"

Greengrass led Snails to a patch of ground filled with purple heart-shaped plants. "I'm glad you seem to be in better spirits, Snails. When I saw you earlier, you looked very sad indeed. I suppose your sister turned that frown upside-down?"

"Uh huh." Snails peered at the plants, thinking he saw a bee perched on the inside of the bluest one.

"That's good. And no mention of trading you in for a newer model, I presume?"

"Nope."

"Splendid!" said Greengrass. "See? I told you that you had nothing to worry about!"

Snails didn't remember Mr. Greengrass telling him that, but he supposed he might have just forgotten it. Greengrass was an adult, after all, and surely wouldn't lie to him. But more importantly, Snails couldn't quite shake the feeling that Greengrass was wrong. He, Snails, still felt like he had something to worry about.

The foal had told himself that he was, once again, being dumb. Hadn't Raindrops and Miss Cheerilee told him how great he was? They were the two smartest ponies in Ponyville, except for his parents, so if they said he was a good brother, he should be able to accept that. And besides, he thought, he'd already showed how awesome he was earlier, when his magic spell had helped his sister and her friends to learn about the bad ponies who had tried to abduct him earlier. Miss Cheerilee and Miss Carrot Top and his big sister had needed his help to figure out what to do next. Didn't that show he was worthy of being Raindrops' little brother?

Snails had tried to believe this repeatedly, but it never seemed to sink in, and he knew why. He could already picture what Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon would say if he told them. "Sure," they'd laugh, "You're good at one spell. But how often is that going to come up? Other brothers are good at things that matter all the time, like being smart or being strong or being good at magic. Doesn't Raindrops deserve a brother with skills that are relevant more than once or twice in his life?"

And the foal couldn't help but think there was something to this. He knew one useful spell... but it had only mattered once and he couldn't think of any other times where it would be really important. Snails was good with bugs, but while bugs were some of the best friends a foal could have, you never really needed to talk to bugs. But ponies like Twist, whose special talent was making candy, or Firelock, whose special talent was setting things on fire, could use their talents all the time. Sure, Snails was good at some things--he could see that now. But did they matter?

Wait a minute... Snails paused for a moment as a new thought ran through his mind, then looked around at the other ponies in the room. There was Twilight, who was a great mage--but she couldn't use magic right now because there was a sparky ring on her head. There was Greengrass, who had a great garden--underground, where nopony could see it. And there was Carrot Top, who was a very nice mare, but who... well, she hadn't been able to do anything at the train station. She hadn't been able to do anything at the boot store. She'd been left outside with Snails when the other Elements went up into that fancy apartment building.

Maybe she's the me of the Elements, thought Snails. The one that isn't good at useful things. He looked over the room. What if they left all the ponies here who aren't able to do important stuff while my sister and Miss Cheerilee and Mr. Max go be heroes?

In his head, he knew that there was something wrong with his logic; he knew his sister would not have lied to him and told him that he was a good brother if he wasn't. But he couldn't make his heart believe it.

"Snails?" The foal realized that Mr. Greengrass was asking him a question. "I'm sorry, was I boring you? Granted, the water cycle isn't terribly interesting, but it's absolutely vital to understand how these little waterbugs help my plants consume less water and therefore..."

"I'm listening," said Snails, even though he hadn't been. "Sorry."

"Ah. Well, as I was saying--"

The upstairs door to the street banged open. A few moments later, the stairwell door did as well. Greengrass paused for a moment, then said, "Snails, why don't you go ask Dame Carrot if she needs any more flower samples? Splendid." And he trotted towards the stairs.

Hey, he's trying to distract me! thought Snails, who didn't move.

Before Greengrass reached the stairs, a beefy unicorn descended from above and stopped just in front of the garden. "Excuse me," she called. "I have an important message for you all from the Don."

Twilight turned. "Who?"

"Dame Carrot Top, please. Let me handle this." Greengrass turned to the unicorn. "Clubby Hoof! How's the little sister? Stompina still promising she'll pay for her operation any day now?"

The unicorn flushed. "Don Stompina is concerned for your safety, what with these abductions in the city. She wishes to place you under her protection. We will happily relocate you to a secure location, where you may wait until the crisis is over."

"We dont want to relocate!" said Twilight. "We're fine here!"

"I'm afraid we must insist," said Clubby Hoof. "For your own good, of course."

"Huh?" Twilight looked at Carrot Top. "What does she mean?"

Carrot Top frowned. "Please don't attack us," she said to Clubby Hoof. "We don't want to fight you. We just want to help everypony and stop the abductions--"

"Don Stompina shares your views. Perhaps you could discuss them. At the secure location."

Greengrass smiled. "Of course she does. Tell me--how large wil our escort be to this 'secure location?'"

"As many ponies as is required, sir." Clubby Hoof smiled, but even Snails could tell it was fake. "We don't want to hurt anypony. But if you won't come, we might have to... persuade you."

Nopony spoke for a moment. Then Greengrass, his voice merry and gay, said, "Well, you know, I'd love to come with you. Honestly, I'd much rather be in a secure location than this rickety old place. But it seems like some of my friends aren't quite convinced. Could you please give me a few minutes to convince them? That way, we wouldn't risk little Snails there getting hurt in any... unpleasantness."

The unicorn scanned the room, snorted, then said, "Fine. We certainly wouldn't want any of you to get hurt. You've got a few minutes to convince your friends. After that, the escorts... well, I'll let you think about that." She turned and walked back up the stairways.

Snails gulped and looked at the adult ponies. They looked nervous and tense, like a fight was coming. That pony must have been one of the bad ponies. But... all of the really useful good ponies like my sister are away fighting the other bad ponies. A squirmy feeling began working its way through Snails' gut. Uh oh...

Greengrass immediately turned to Carrot Top. "Dame Carrot, this is more your department than mine. Any ideas?"

Carrot Top hesitated. "Um... I mean, I'm not that good at this... that's kind of why they left me here..."

"Terrific." Greengrass sighed. "So we have no useful--" He stopped talking as Twilight walked over to one of his benches and began to pull the legs off. "Um, Miss Twilight, what are you doing?"

"Putting together a makeshift see-saw catapult," she said in a matter-of-fact voice. "Feel free to help."

"I wasn't aware you were conversant in such things."

"I have a working knowledge of physics." Twilight got the seat of the bench off and began piling a collection of large rocks next to it. "And... I know I panicked at the train station, but I'm done with all of that. No more running, no more hiding. If the mafia wants to capture me, I'm going to give them a fight."

She refocused on her work, with Carrot Top drifting over to her. Greengrass looked at Snails, who was smiling in the aftermath of Twilight's speech. "And as for you, I think the garden shed--"

"No!" Snails planted his hooves firmly. "I'm not hiding! I'm going to fight!'

"But--"

"I'm going to be a good brother!" said Snails. "A good brother would help protect his friends! Like Miss Twilight, and Miss Carrot Top, and you!" He felt a bolt of fear crash through him, but he wouldn't let himself back down. After all, Raindrops wouldn't--and he was going to be worthy of Raindrops. "I'll help however I can!"

He narrowed his eyes. "And I won't let anypony stop me!"

***

Raindrops, Cheerilee, and Mounty Max galloped through the deserted streets of Canterlot's lowest level. They ran past massive warehouses, some several stories tall, that stored every kind of good that anypony in Canterlot might possibly buy. Normally, Max knew, the warehouses would be teaming with ponies--some loading goods into the warehouses, some taking them out, some showing prospective buyers around--but each and every one of them was devoid of life. Max shook his head and pushed himself to run even faster. This is wrong, he thought. The ponies in this city shouldn't have to suffer this kind of terror. He grit his teeth. We are going to stop this.

"At least there's no crowds," said Cheerilee. "Can you imagine if we had to fight traffic to get to Gate 19 Below?"

Max raised an eyebrow. "I'm surprised you're able to joke right now."

"Oh, remind me to tell you one time when I said to Corona when she was about to incinerate us." Cheerilee looked back at Max, eyes twinkling. "It's a hoot."

Raindrops said nothing. Max eyed her worriedly; her silence had a grim, angry quality to it; even when Max asked her a direct question, she gave a monosyllabic answer or a grunt. She needs a break, Max thought. She needs to calm down. But there was no time for a break, and so Max could only watch her as she ran and hope that she wouldn't hurt herself in her anger.

They were halfway to the airship dock when Max heard voices--and, more importantly, the clinks of armor and weapons. Yes! We might get some backup after all! "I think I hear the Guards!" he called.

"Yippee," muttered Raindrops.

Cheerilee said, "Max, we're short on time--"

"They're on our way, and we have to try! If Goliath is as strong as you said, we'll need every pair of hooves we can get!" Max smiled to himself. We know what we're doing now. If I just talk to the Guards, I'm sure I can get some of them to follow me.

Three blocks later, they came upon the soldiers. They weren't the Guards, though. Several members of Archduke Fisher's Factory Security ponies surrounded a very tall warehouse whose windows seemed to glow with a bizarrely bright light. Max called out to them as he approached with the Knights, but they didn't look at him. They just aimed weapons at the warehouse and waited.

"Hey!" said Max. "I need to talk to whoever's in charge!"

One pony glanced back at him and said, "We're not the Guards. We don't answer to you."

Max approached the Factory Security pony. "Lives are at stake," he said. He glanced behind him for the Elements, but couldn't see them; they had run on ahead. "Please, just--"

The door to the warehouse burst open and several ponies wearing Factory Security uniforms hurried out. In the lead was a tall pony with a strong build and a large warhammer--Archduke Fisher himself. His coat was blackened and he seemed to have a few new bruises, but he still stormed out of the building like a titan. On his back were two unconscious ponies wearing white clothes with drawings of the sun; the other Factory Security forces had a few more between them. Fisher had those ponies bound and set to one side, then turned. "We made it to level three," he said. "We're almost to the top. Next raid, I'll need twelve strong ponies, three per side--"

"Archduke!" called Max. "Archduke, I need to talk to you!"

Fisher swiveled around and stared. "Baron Max? What are you doing here?"

"That's a long story. I have to tell you--"

"It doesn't matter. I have no time for you, Max," growled Fisher. "My team is raiding the Sun Cult hideout in this city now. You have no business being involved."

Max forced himself not to scowl. Placate. That's what Posey would do here. "I can see you're very busy--"

"Busy?" Fisher's voice rose. "In case you did not know, Baron, the escaped Sun Cultist Soleil Supreme snuck his way across the city and holed up with the remnants of the Cult in Canterlot. They have enough magical artifacts to threaten the safety of everypony on this side of the Canterhorn. We are trying to clear them out before they use those artifacts to hurt anypony. We're a bit more than 'busy.'"

Max nodded. "Still, there's another crisis. The abductions--"

Fisher turned away. "I have no time for this nonsense."

"This is life or death!" yelled Max, darting around Fisher. "For all we know, the vigilantes could be ready to execute their prisoners right now! Just lend me a few of your forces--"

"No. I will not waste them chasing ghosts, Max."

"They're not ghosts! They're real! Real ponies attacked us under the train station!"

"Yes. Mafia ponies, trying to escape."

"The mafia ponies were captured by the vigilantes! If you'd just--"

Fisher shook his head. "If we fail here, the Sun Cult could have a chance to annihilate multiple city blocks. I will not risk that on some fairy tales."

"The abductions are important too. Lives are at stake," said Max. He felt helpless, as helpless as when he had first joined the Court and hadn't known why nothing he did had been effective, why he didn't even seem able to speak the same language as the other Courtiers. "The lives of ponies who don't deserve to--"

"I don't believe you," said Fisher.

And Max heard, in Fisher's tone, 'I don't care.'

While he was staring, Fisher continued and said, "If you want to do something useful, find the Elements. Get them indoors. I will not have their lives risked in this insanity."

Max looked at Fisher as if seeing him for the first time. "We are not legally allowed to imprison them."

"I didn't say anything about 'imprisoning' them. Convince them. Protect them. For a few hours, at most, until this is resolved." Max was silent. "There is a greater good here, Max."

"But they have rights. If they want to risk--"

"Their lives are too important to risk!" Fisher, who was an inch or two taller than Max in his armor, knelt slightly and moved very close to Max. "Listen closely, colt. Every decision we make as nobles will help some ponies and hurt others. That transportation bill you loved so much? The funds it took to pay for that bill could have been used for other projects. Your bill passed at the expenses of the others, and the interests of the ponies who would have benefitted from those bills was sacrificed in order that the ponies who need rural transportation could prosper. This is how governing works. Something must always be sacrificed. Our job is to determine what is necessary and what is expendable." He put his mouth near Max's ears and hissed, "If you are not able to sacrifice the interests of a few ponies for the interests of many ponies, you are not fit to rule."

Max was silent. He had no idea how to respond to that.

Fisher straightened. "Use whatever legal means you have to in order to get the Elements off the streets and away from any risk of harm. Now, get out of my way!" He turned to his companions and instantly began planning the next attack on the Cult. "We'll raid from all four sides..."

After a few moments, Max ran off.

"Hey," said a voice to his side after two blocks. Max turned to see Cheerilee; Raindrops closed in on his other side. "So, how'd that go?"

"He doesn't want to help." Max looked down. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. We're used to the government being useless--"

When Max turned back to her, there was determination in his eyes. "Not all of it," he said. "I'm here, and I swear I will do whatever I can to help you bring the vigilantes to justice."

Cheerilee smiled. "Of course," she said. "And--thank you. We need all the help we can get."

The ponies continued running, steadily approaching the path to the airship docks.

***

Greengrass hesitated as he looked down at the determined foal in front of him. "Now, Snails," he said. "Nopony would think any less of you for letting--"

"I don't care!" Snails looked up at Greengrass with a surprising amount of passion in his eyes for a little colt. "I'll show everypony I'm a good little brother! I'll fight the bad guys!"

"I see." Greengrass rubbed a hoof down the back of his neck. "It's just--"

Snails began walking forwards, darting at various hiding places with a foal's sense of wisdom. He crawled into a rosebush, leapt back out as the thorns scratched through his coat, then hid behind a rock not quite large enough to conceal him. His horn glowed and a few small rocks began moving near him. The foal chuckled, then began hefting them with telekinesis, as if getting ready to throw.

Greengrass stood very still for a moment, took a breath, and forced himself to think. Okay. The problem is that Raindrops' brother is having a crisis of self-worth and is about to get himself killed. If I let this happen, Raindrops will throw me off the Canterhorn. What can I do about it?

The first option was obvious. Carrot Top was currently bent over one of Greengrass's most beautiful plots, digging up an aesthetically-pleasing boulder to bring to Twilight. Greengrass could simply pick up his shovel and hit her in the back of the head with it--he had found that, no matter how many knighthoods or awards a pony had won, they were still susceptible to a blow to the head--to knock her out, then stuff Snails into a burlap sack or something and surrender. That would keep him safe from the mob. On the downside, though, it didn't really solve the Raindrops problem, and Raindrops was a good deal scarier than the mob. Plus, Luna would probably object for some reason. So that was out.

The second option was to somehow restrain Snails--tie him up with vines, maybe--and stuff him into a corner while the fighting went on. But Snails was a foal, and in Greengrass's experiences, foals had proven themselves far too capable of getting in the way at the worst possible time. Greengrass would probably be able to tie Snails up, but then the foal might well escape and join the fray. That would be disaster.

Option three was to somehow convince Snails to stay out of the fight, that he had nothing to prove and could leave the rough stuff to the adults. Greengrass rolled his eyes at the very notion. He knew well that foals were immune to logic and reason. If Greengrass had ice cream, he might have a chance to bribe the colt, but he didn't.

Option four was to fob the duty off to somepony else, but Carrot Top was useless and Twilight was busy. That was out.

And then there was option five. Greengrass looked at the foal, feeling the slight itching in his flank that told him that his own particular talent could be useful. Snails was a mass of insecurities, and was still battling against the feelings of inadequacy and shame that his classmates had inflicted upon him earlier that day. Greengrass could read the foal like a book, he could see the fissure lines across his psyche, and it would be trivially easy to widen them. With just a few choice sentences, he could shatter the foal's self-esteem and convince him that he was worthless, that he was useless, that no help he ever gave would ever matter. Snails would sit down, stay quiet, avoid the fight, and when Raindrops picked up her brother later, she'd only see that he was uninjured, never know that his depression wasn't just the aftereffects of his classmates' teasing words. It was, in a strictly rational sense, the best way to keep himself from being beaten up by Raindrops.

Greengrass opened his mouth, then paused, finding himself unable to say the words he needed to say. He told himself that he was being stupid, that while he had never directly hurt a foal before he had certainly contributed to their suffering in indirect ways--the families of those he had weeded, for instance, or the Ponyville foals whose ruined town he had refused to rebuild unless the Elements supported him politically. Now the mafia was after him, he had no political support to call on, and one of the most powerful ponies in Equestria--a knight of the realm, with direct access to Luna Herself--was already willing to come for his head. It was no time to become squeamish. He had to act to protect himself and keep himself alive--after all, that was what mattered.

Plus, he had risked his life before. He had managed to survive, thanks to the intervention of Max, his father, and a Diamond Dog friend of his father's, but he had still lost almost everything he loved. His power, his influence, all of it was gone... and while Notary was alive, he would never see her again. Didn't that settle it? Acting for others only hurt him. He had to be strong and act in his own interests, even if it destroyed Snails.

But the image that entered his head in response wasn't his father, or the weathermare who would beat him up if Snails were hurt, or Luna, or even Snails himself. He saw Max, the pony who had found him when he was about to be killed by terrorists, and who--even though he looked like he'd gone three rounds with an Ursa, with blood dripping from multiple wounds and bruises all along the right side of his body--had tackled the last cultist and knocked the knife aside; Greengrass had been cut in the side, instead of being stabbed in the heart. And when Greengrass later asked why, Max had just smiled. "You're a citizen of the nation," he had said. "As a Night Court member, it's my duty to protect you."

"Oh," Greengrass had said. "So it wasn't personal; you'd have done the same for anypony at all. You still think I'm the terrible pony you said I was yesterday--"

"Sure." Max had smiled. "I would have. But I don't think you're terrible. Anypony who would give up his power, his dreams, and his life to save a friend like you did can't be all bad."

Greengrass found his mouth slowly closing as three thoughts ran through his mind. The first was that, if he did break Snails, he would sacrifice the friendship of Mounty Max... quite possibly his only friend left. The second was the memory of how he'd felt when Notary had run off, when he'd watched her vanish down a hallway, knowing he could never see her again, knowing that if they somehow did meet her only sane move would be to spit in his face and his only possible move would be to let her. He'd felt that feeling in the pit of his stomach that was like some horrid combination of grief for his friend, and remorse for the actions that had made their separation inevitable. He knew that he never wanted to feel like that again.

And the third thought that he couldn't get rid of was that it would hurt Snails if Greengrass smashed his self-esteem. Greengrass tried telling himself that these were just ideas Max had spoken of, that he was too smart and rational to care about things like that--that Snails wouldn't care about him if their positions were reversed, so he shouldn't care about Snails--that anypony would act like he did, that it was all well and good to speak of morals but nopony ever followed them when it really mattered except for fools like Max--but it didn't matter. Snails would be hurt, and that was wrong because Snails was a foal and did not deseve to be hurt for no reason. And so, if Greengrass hurt him, that would be shameful. Immoral. At least, according to how Max defined things. And that mattered, for some reason Greengrass could not explain.

I'm Greengrass, Duke of Caneighda! he thought to himself. I'm a practical gamescolt. I don't take stupid risks or make foolish decisions. The one time I did, I lost almost everything I loved. I'm not risking what's left of my life and my future for... for a foal, and for a friendship with some self-righteous noble who doesn't know anything, who... He trailed off.

He knew he couldn't do it.He couldn't break Snails, even to save himself.

Damn. I thought it'd be fun to befriend Max, see if I could smarten him up, influence him. How did he wind up influencing me?Greengrass laughed a rueful chuckle. That was a question he could figure out later. For now...

He had to embark on his stupid, irrational, absurd, and yet strangely 'right'-feeling choice.

"Snails!" he said, approaching the foal. If I can convince him he's got nothing to prove, he won't want to fight either. That's my only other option. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Sure."

Greengrass thought for a moment. Weeding was easy, but building a pony up? Not his bag. Still, he had to keep going. He could sense the cracks in Snails' psyche; if he was to keep Snails out of the battle without weeding the foal, he'd have to weed out those cracks by patching them up. "Earlier you said you weren't good at anything. You're not still feeling that way, are you?"

"I guess I'm good at a few things." Snails darted to another rock like he was in a Daring Do book. "But I dunno. I don't know if they're important things. But if I fight bad guys like my sister, I'll know I'm good at things that are good to be good at! Like her!"

Greengrass took a moment to untangle Snails' tortured syntax. "Oh?" he asked. "What are you good at that you don't think is important to be good at?"

"Well,I took a magic picture earlier and that helped my sister figure something out--"

"A magic picture?" Greengrass made a little gasp of surprise. "You mean you can just look at something and cast a spell and then you a picture of what it looks like? A perfect picture?"

"Yeah--"

"But that's amazing! Why, with that spell, you could be a great reporter!" Greengrass swept a leg out. "You could take one look at a really big event, something that most reporters would be struggling to encompass, and take one picture and have a view of the whole thing! Or... you could be a scientist! You could do all kinds of experiments and take a picture of how each one turned out, so you could remember them perfectly!" He grinned. "And that's not even getting into how you could do portraits, or make ID cards, or a dozen other wonderfully useful careers!"

Snails was smiling brightly, but then he seemed to catch himself. "Hey!" he said. "You're just trying to make me feel good. You don't really think those things are really important."

"Why wouldn't I think that?" asked Greengrass. "Aren't all those things I said true?"

"But... but there's some ponies who are good at important things, and others who aren't and who are only good at silly things!" insisted Snails. "That's what everypony says! And I want to be good at important things! Like Raindrops!"

Greengrass paused for a moment as he looked back at the glum Carrot Top. Snails probably won't listen to me, no matter what I do. But I have an idea. "I see," he said. "It sounds like you think you're in the 'Carrot Top' position."

"The what?"

"You know, the 'Carrot Top' of foals. You know, not good for much. But--"

"Hey!" said Snails, as Carrot Top trotted over to the sound of her name. "That's mean! Miss Carrot Top's good at all kinds of things. She makes great carrots, and she makes potions so my sister can drink a lot of cider without getting a headache, and one time she beat up a timberwolf!"

Carrot Top blushed. "Thanks, Snails," she said. "I'm sorry I'm not able to fight for you better--"

"Huh?" Snails tilted his head. "But you've fought off Corona and Grogar and all kinds of other mean ponies!"

"Grogar?" asked Greengrass.

Carrot Top ignored him. "I was there, but--"

"And Luna knighted you! And she knows everything, so she wouldn't have knighted you if you weren't good at protecting ponies like me."

Carrot Top said nothing for a moment. It was easy for her to forget sometimes that she really had been through a lot. She'd battled salamanders, and Everfree abominations, and golems, and all manner of beasts. But she still couldn't help comparing herself to Raindrops and Cheerilee, both of whom had been far more useful than she was. "I meant today," she said. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to do what Cheerilee and Raindrops could do today. They helped fight for you, and I couldn't do much--"

"Until you came here," said Greengrass. "But didn't you tell me you were planning on using some of the flowers and plants in this room to make weapons to help us fight the mafia?"

Um, no... thought Carrot Top. But she couldn't stop her mind from working as she looked through the flowers. Now that she looked at them, she thought she could see some that would be useful for that purpose...

"Yeah!" said Snails. "You're super awesome with plants! You'll make some awesome potions that'll beat up the mafia ponies for us!" His smile flickered. "And I'll help too! Even if I'm not good at much--"

"Isn't that what I was saying about Carrot Top?" asked Greengrass. "But if it's not true for her, maybe it's not true for you."

"Yeah!" said Carrot Top. "Snails, you're good at lots of things."

"Just one spell--"

"And with bugs." Carrot Top sat next to Snails. "Do you have any idea how useful that is to farmers? You could talk pests into leaving our crops alone. You could talk helpful bugs into pollinating our plants and making them spread further. You could be a huge asset to our community."

Snails blushed. "You're just saying that."

"Nope. The farming bugs exhibit I was at today suggested that a good bug expert can increase a farm's productivity by over 30%. And that's just with a pony who knows a lot about bugs. One who can befriend them, and make them into bug buddies--"

"Buggies," corrected Snails.

"Make them into buggies? That would be a huge help. You could be one of the most valuable ponies around. In fact, I happen to know that Green Grapes was talking to Dewdrop about offering you a weekend job next spring."

Snails blinked. "Really?!"

"Really." Carrot Top looked at the foal in front of her, and then looked at the plants around her. I'm not a trained fighter... but Snails is right. I'm not useless either, and I can definitely use this environment to my advantage. "Maybe we're not good in hoof fights," she said. "But we're still good at a lot of things. We still help all the ponies around us live happy lives. Isn't that what matters?"

"Uh huh."

Carrot Top began to pull flowers out of the ground, ignoring Greengrass's sounds of dismay. "I'll mix up some potions," she said. "To help us fight the mob. And then, when we fight them off and go home, I'm going to take you around my garden. I'll show you all the bugs that I work with. Okay?"

Snails nodded.

"Alright. Now, sit back and watch--and I'll show the world what an awesome knight like me can do."

Greengrass smiled as Snails trotted off where Carrot Top directed him. She had, he thought, finally convinced Snails of his own worth--which meant he would bother to engage in a little self-preservation, which was all Greengrass had wanted. Not bad for my first try at anti-weeding a pony...

"Hey!" called Twilight. "Greengrass! Help me put this catapult together!"

Chuckling, Greengrass trotted over to help.

***

Snails crouched behind a bush and watched the bad ponies enter the garden.

There were several of of them, all big hulking stallions and mares with piercings, tattoos dyed into their coats, and a variety of strange hairstyles that Snails knew his mother would never let him wear. He took a magic photo of them anyway, just in case Snips wanted some ideas, then resumed watching them. He saw them step into the garden, trampling flowers as they looked around, and then--

Carrot Top stood from behind a large trellis and heft a packet of herbs at the bad ponies. It was lit, and as it burned a thick cloud of smoke began to emerge. The mob ponies swiveled and scattered, but a few of them were too slow and were caught in the smoke. Snails quickly heard them coughing and gasping, and one of them even seemed to slump over as the others got away. Wow! the colt thought.

Carrot Top ran through the garden, throwing another packet of herbs at the pony right behind her. It stuck to his coat and the pony's legs tangled; Carrot Top had told Snails that she had found some plants that would combine to have a strong 'numbing' effect. The next pony vaulted over her fallen comrade, right at Carrot Top--until Greengrass stepped out from behind a bush and, as if he knew exactly when and where to attack in order to stop his enemy, swung a heavy shovel at the pony's knee. The other pony screamed and went down hard.

"Get them!" roared one of the bad ponies, who looked like the leader. "They're just two ponies! A noble and the weakest Element of the 6! GET THEM!"

"Yes, Stompina!" the thugs yelled as they attacked.

Snails' eyes widened as he watched the battle. Carrot Top was always fleeing, clearly not fond of the idea of hoof-to-hoof combat, but as she ran she kept dropping her plant weapons. Some smoked, some stung, two fell together and burst into an explosion that stunned the pony behind her long enough for her to turn and give a solid kick to his face. Greengrass was also not good at hoof-fighting--Snails saw him get hit a few times--but he battled with his heavy shovel, watching his enemies and then striking at just the right moment to make them overbalance or collide with each other. Snails inched forwards--his horn now poking out of the bush--to get a better view. Wow! This is amazing! I--

He felt himself seized by magic and dragged towards Clubby Hoof. "Boss! I got the foal! I--"

BONK

The unicorn fell over, unconscious, thanks to a rock that had hit her in the head.

Snails turned to see Twilight crouched behind her makeshift catapult, with some rocks piled at one end for ammuniition. "How did you do that?" asked Snails. "You hit her on your first shot!"

"What? That?" Twilight blushed, and her broken magic ring gave off a few sparks for good measure. "I read a book on physics once. Never used it before, but--look out!" And Snails jumped to the side while Twilight launched another rock at the pony charging at him, scoring another direct hit.

The mob ponies fell quickly. Snails could barely keep track of all the fighting, but he saw that the leader was gradually running out of ponies to throw at the Element and the others. "COME ON!" Stompina screamed. "They aren't hard! They'll fall any minute!"

"Oh?" asked Greengrass. He was bleeding and had a few bruises on his side from saps, but he was still standing, and he smacked a bad pony in the leg as that pony charged by him to reach Carrot Top. "Strange. At this rate, I think we could hold out for some hours."

"Maybe days," chimed in Carrot Top.

"Well, technically, at this rate--" began Twilight before the other two glared at her. "Ah, days it is."

Stompina growled and charged at Greengrass, grabbing a heavy chain from her saddlebag. "You're mine!" she roared. She leapt at the Duke, who swung his shovel and hit the mobster--to no effect, the other pony was too big and too strong to be stopped like that. Stompina slammed into Duke, knocking him over, and then wrapped her chain around the noble's neck.

Carrot Top leapt onto his back and, holding hooffuls of flowers, wrapped around Stompina's neck and began to squeeze.

The stallion reared back, but Carrot Top held on, and Snails could see an odd blue tint spreading where the farmer was holding onto the mobster. The bad pony began to flail as Greengrass pushed the chain aside, then grabbed his shovel and smacked up at Stompina's chin. The pony let out a cry of rage, shook her head with a mighty thrust and sent Carrot Top flying into some rose bushes, stood still for a moment as she tried to recover, and then--

A rock slammed into her head and her stood for a moment, then fell over, leaving only a stunned Twilight by her catapult. "Did I get her?" she asked.

"Uh huh," said Carrot Top. "Nice shot!"

Twilight blushed. "It's just a few mathematical principles--"

"Could we perhaps make use of some healing principles?" asked Greengrass. "Specifically, for me?"

Snails ignored the conversation. He instead looked around at Carrot Top--who had used plants to be awesome, and Greengrass--who had used 'weeding' to fight bad guys, and Twilight--who had used 'physics', which Snails had never heard of in his life, to use rocks and bits of wood to beat her foes. He didn't just see how those talents, as silly or obscure as they might sound, could be useful for some really important things. He felt it. He understood.

And he knew, then, that even if his own skills seemed silly or trivial, that there were probably all kinds of places where he could use them. He could save the day with bugs, or with a magic camera in his head, or with all the other things he could do. If weeding or gardening could beat up a bunch of bad ponies,so could all of his skills. He could do great things with his abilities. He could be worthy of his sister. He was worthy of his sister.

Carrot Top and Greengrass were chattering happily, and Snails ran to them, jumping up and down and hugging everypony indiscrimintantly. I get it now! he thought. I get it. I can be useful and I can do great things, and that means I am great, and Raindrops is lucky to have a little brother as good as me!

Now even Twilight, still looking a bit freaked out, was joining the group. Snails hopped onto her back and hugged her around the neck.

Come back soon, Raindrops! The foal smiled to himself. I want to give you a big hug, cause you're the best sister ever.

***

Raindrops, Cheerilee, and Mounty Max stopped at the entrance to Gate 19 Below. The airship docking space was a large cave cut into the Canterhorn's side, separated from empty space by a huge metal door which was sealed tight. There was also a pony-sized door, reachable from a narrow path down from the lowest level of Canterlot. It was at this latter door that the trio paused for a moment.

Max put his ear against the door. "Voices," he said after a moment. "And I think I heard a yell. Somepony's not happy in there"

"The prisoners are alive," added Cheerilee. "At least, some of them." She glanced up the path. "No sign of the Guards. Max, we can't wait any longer. We have to go, now."

"I know." Max looked down. "Sorry."

"Hey, you tried." Cheerilee smiled. "And honestly, at this point I'd rather have you here than one of them anyway. You know what you're doing."

"I do seem to do it a little too often." Max chuckled. "Let's do this."

Raindrops said nothing. She just waited for Cheerilee to pick the lock, then ran through the door, followed closely by her friends.They raced through the hallway, burst into the main docking bay, and--

And froze as they looked in shock at what lay before them.

Vigilante Justice

The airship docking facility was a plush, opulent room extending deep into the Canterhorn. Its floor was covered in thick red carpet, its walls were painted with fantastic murals depicting the history of Equestrian flight, and even the ceiling had been glamoured to give the appearance of an open sky. Excepting a few small cabinets for tools on the sides, and a series of maintenance catwalks on the ceiling, the entirety of the room was devoted to two massive empty bays for airships. There were two lanes for airships to park in, and the lane between them was comprised of a single row of tall, ornamental columns that almost reached the height of the catwalks. Each column had carved into it a famous figure involved in the pioneering of Equestrian aerial glory--Wonderbolts like Purpleheart and Firefly, mages like Star Swirl and Red Magician, and industrialists with airship lines like Bobbing Fisher. Also, on top of each column was a pony.

There were a lot of ponies on top of those columns.

Raindrops couldn't help but stare at the column in the exact center of the room. It was a huge marble edipiece with Easyglider's face chiseled into it, and on top of it, a foot or two below a catwalk, stood an old, withered stallion. His brown coat and pea-green mane were in total disarray, and his wings were tightly bound to his sides with what looked like wire. A thick iron chain ran from his neck up to the catwalk above his head, such that if he fell off the pillar, the chain would hang him. A few wires also ran around the pillar and connected to some boxes near its middle that read 'Fisher Mining.' Those might be explosive charges, Raindrops thought. So...

"When those bombs explode, the pillars collapse and the ponies will be hanged," Cheerilee murmured. The teacher craned her neck up to look at the captives, none of which seemed to have noticed their sneaky entrance yet. "Does anypony see a timer?"

"Or a ladder?" asked Max. His head darted around as he looked through the room. "Come on, we need to find a way up there."

"Let's look for a way to cut those chains first," whispered Cheerilee. "There's no point in going up if we can't actually free those ponies."

"Point." Max began rumaging through the tool cabinets on their side of the room.

"This is.. this is completely insane!" Raindrops muttered, still staring at the ponies trapped in the gorgeous room. "It's like something a six-year old would come up with!"

"I suppose they let Goliath design the method of execution, then," said Cheerilee. "It makes sense; hanging is the traditional 'just' way of killing a bad pony, and Goliath thinks these are all bad ponies."

"And he knows how to use explosives," said Max. "So that's the mechanism to knock out the pillars."

Raindrops stared. "This is nuts," she managed. "I don't believe this." She found herself reminded of Snails' bug amusement park, which had been similarly inventive, if smaller-scale and involving fewer high-yield explosives and death traps. What's wrong with this guy?

The pony on the column nearest the front entrance glanced over. "Oh my... Cheerilee?" she gasped. She was a tall, cream-colored earth pony with a frazzled red mane and the remnants of glasses still perched above her muzzle. "Cheerilee? Thank the Stars!"

"Duty!" called Cheerilee. "I--"

"HEY!"

A unicorn ran out from a door on the opposite side of the room. He was of average size and build, utterly nondescript, and even his cutie mark seemed to blend into his gray coat. His horn was also unremarkable; while bigger than the mortar pony's, it wasn't quite as long as the crane operator's. The only really distinguishable thing about him was his big, trembling eyes. "You're not supposed to be here!" he yelled as he approached them. "This is private! This is--"

"You must be Agent Sneak Attack," said Cheerilee, as the prisoners above looked down and began to whisper hurriedly to each other. "No need to introduce yourself. Twilight told us about you." She smiled thinly. "Twilight survived, by the way. I wonder if she'll be able to pick you out of a line-up?"

"Nopony was supposed to get hurt!" The Shadowbolt, sweating, abruptly reversing and backing up against a pillar showing Red Magician's imperious face. "That wasn't the plan! I only wanted to capture her!"

"Nopony's supposed to get hurt?" Raindrops swept a hoof at the ponies who were about to be hanged. "Then what in Equestria is this all about?"

"Just scaring them! They're criminals, thieves, they got away with it, we only wanted to show them that they couldn't keep doing bad things to innocent ponies! I didn't want anypony to die!"

"Really?" said Max. "Because I heard about trains--"

"Not my idea! That was the third guy! I don't even know his name!" The Shadowbolt looked almost sick. "All I did was get information on where the criminals were, maybe distract some doorponies, hush up neighbors that heard scuffles! I never hurt anypony! Look, none of this was supposed to--"

Cheerilee held up a hoof. "I understand. You just wanted to scare them, not kill them. I'm sure these executions were all Goliath's idea."

"Goliath and the other guy, the one who threw the trains at you!"

"Of course," said Cheerilee. Raindrops followed her as she approached the Shadowbolt; Max stayed behind and frantically hunted for a tool that they could use to cut the chains and free the trapped ponies. Cheerilee discretely glanced behind her, then said, "Goliath knew that hanging was the proper way of eliminating the bad ponies in Equestria. It's how Luna does it, after all."

"Yes!"

"And explosions? Well, every adventure book from Daring Do to The Young Adventures of Starswirl the Bearded show that explosions are the best way of getting rid of evil monsters."

"Exactly!"

Cheerilee nodded, but when she again glanced back Raindrops, the weathermare recognized a hard glint in her eye. "But there's one thing that confuses me," she continued. "I can't help but notice that on the ponies closer to the door, the knot of the noose is under the chin, so they'll die instantly when the pillars collapse. But on the ponies further from the door, the knot's at the back of the neck, so they'll asphyxiate, which is a more painful way to die. Granted, I suppose a pony like Goliath might like the idea that 'worse' ponies suffer more. But my question is, how did Goliath know how to position the knots like that? Not the kind of thing a mining specialist with mental disabilities picks up." She tilted her head. "Any ideas, Agent Attack?"

"What--that's absurd!" said Attack. "Why would you think the knot position means anything? You read too many--"

"Oh, I dated a hangmare for a while," said Cheerilee. "Now, answer the question."

The Shadowbolt was silent for a few moments.

"You wouldn't be trying to lull us into a false sense of security by pretending that you're not as homicidal as your colleages, would you?" Cheerilee's grin was sickly sweet. "Well?"

When Sneak Attack spoke again, all nervousness was gone from his voice. "Goliath," he called. "There's bad ponies in this room! Get them!"

From behind another door, this one labeled 'STAFF BREAK ROOM', a huge roar bellowed through the cave. The prisoners screamed and cringed, and even Raindrops was taken aback. Woah, she thought. That pony's got some lungs.

Cheerilee looked back at Raindrops and Max. "Get to the prisoners. I'll handle Attack--"

The door to the break room burst down and a titantic pony stormed through. Raindrops saw a black coat, a red mane, a pair of heavy boots on very thick legs, and a crumpled face that looked like he'd taken a few too many of his own mortars to the head. His horn was still short, angular, and flat at the top, and Raindrops wondered if the tip had actually been cut off at some point. Then the pony bellowed again, and dug a few deep divots into the carpet with his hooves, and all other thoughts fled her mind.

"Cheerilee!" Raindrops turned to see Max, who was holding a pair of heavy boltcutters by means of a loop of wire attached to the handles and wrapped around his neck. "I've got cutters!"

"Good. I'll fight Attack, and--"

"I'll rescue the prisoners, got it," said Max, hurrying towards the nearest wall. "Raaindrops, take Goliath!"

"WHAT?!" screamed Raindrops as Goliath's horn began to glow and Cheerilee ran towards Sneak Attack. "Why do I have to fight Goliath?! I can fly! I--"

"Because you're the only one of us strong enough to actually hurt him," said Cheerilee. "And--" Her next sentence was cut short as Sneak Attack struck a hoof at her muzzle that would have broken it had she not dodged. "Just do it!"

Raindrops looked at Goliath and knew the next few minutes would be painful. She would suffer, and maybe even get badly hurt, for the sake of criminals, thieves, and pony scum. And for a moment she could feel nothing but blinding hate towards the vigilantes and towards the criminals they had attacked, to the point where she sympathisized with the desire to just blow up the cave and ensure that nopony had to deal with them again.

But the moment passed, and with a low growl, she leapt at Goliath.

***

It was like no fight Raindrops had ever been in before.

Goliath wasn't an intelligent fighter. He acted on impulse, striking direct blows at Raindrops with no sense of strategy. He didn't seem to know any martial arts and instead used simple kicks and bucks that Raindrops, slow as she was, could ususally dodge. And, though Goliath was a unicorn, he didn't use any magic, not even his mortar spell, after Raindrops got close enough that Goliath would likely be caught in his own splash damage. But he didn't need to be smart, or strategic, or magical. He was strong, with more physical strength than any opponent that Raindrops had ever gone hoof-to-hoof with except for Corona Herself. Even the necromatic monstrosities of Grogar had nothing on Goliath.

A kick slammed past her barrel and smashed through the carpet and concrete of the cave floor, sending chunks of rubble everywhere. Raindrops dodged to one side and then unleashed a blistering one-two combination on the brute's face, slamming both of her front hooves into the sides of his muzzle in rapid succession. Goliath just roared again in inarticulate anger and smashed his head at Raindrops. It barely clipped her, but she still found herself stumbling away, and she had to throw herself to one side before Goliath's follow-up mashed her into the ground.

"Goliath!" yelled Sneak Attack, who had dropped into a martial arts stance and was circling with Cheerilee. "On the wall! There's a very bad pony up there who makes foals cry! Blast him!"

Goliath snapped his head up, and Raindrops looked too, to see that Max had given up on his search for a ladder and was climbing straight up the cavern wall towards the catwalks. As Raindrops watched, Max reached for a crack that was barely half a hoof wide, slipped, almost fell, but then regained his balance--

And then Goliath's horn hummed as the pony charged up for another shot.

Raindrops flew at the brute and wrapped her hooves around his neck, swinging around him so that she was on his back and then bending upwards with all her might. Slowly, by pitting the entirety of her strength against Goliath's neck, she managed to crane the roaring Goliath's head up just a little bit. His horn flashed and a mortar blasted at the wall--

To strike just above Max, knocking a hole in the mural and erasing Luna's face from the painting, but missing the Baron's body by inches.

"AAAARGH!" Goliath flung himself backwards, almost crushing Raindrops under his weight. The weathermare managed to roll to one side, but this time, Goliath flailed a hoof at her and caught her on the upside of her head. It was just a glancing blow, but Raindrops' head still slammed back into the concrete and she saw stars. For a moment, she lay stunned on the ground and felt nothing.

But then the pain hit her, cutting through the numbness caused by the blow, and Raindrops jerked herself away from the next attack and struck back at the beast with a blow that caused even Goliath to stumble backwards. Her vision had taken on a reddish tinge, as the pain fed into her anger and fueld it even more. I don't care what's wrong with you. I'm taking you and all you bastards down! She dropped under the next blow, then kicked upwards and smacked Goliath in the chin, earning a roar of pain.

Goliath slammed down at her with his massive boots, and the battle continued.

***

"Why did you betray the government?" asked Cheerilee, snapping a hoof out in a feint. "You're supposed to uphold the nation's laws!"

"Uphold the laws?" hissed Sneak Attack. "Don't talk to me about the laws! You sit in your rural hamlet, where the worst crime that ever happens is when your drunken Representative vandalizes the town fountain. You know nothing about what goes behind the scenes in Canterlot!"

Cheerilee leapt at him, striking at him in a move designed to flip him onto his back. Sneak Attack deflected the first two blows, then grabbed Cheerilee's hoof on the third and flipped her, threatening to break her shoulder if she landed badly--but she didn't, she twisted in the air and slammed another hoof into the side of Attack's head, knocking him to the right and causing him to lose his grip on the teacher. In a moment, both ponies were back up and circling agan.

"I worked as a Shadowbolt for thirty years! I tracked down all kinds of bad ponies--smugglers, forgers, thieves, hitters, all of them. I sent a lot of them to prison. And then our idiotic government kept letting them out!" Attack swung at Cheerilee. His attack was a hair slow, but Cheerilee saw in his stance that he was trying to bait her into exploiting the 'flaw', and so just twisted aside. "I've lost count of how many ponies I caught were sentenced to 'house arrest', or even worse, 'probation!' Because they were 'sorry' or 'didn't mean it' or they only committed crimes because they were 'desperate.'" His face twisted into a snarl. "And while our judges and our nobles and even our princess are so concerned about being 'kind', about giving 'second chances' and trying to 'rehabilitate' and 'not ruin a pony's life for one bad deed', crime goes on! Every criminal knows that, if they're caught, they just need a sob story and they'll get out in a week with a stern warning and a slap on the fetlock!"

He struck at Cheerilee with a lightning-fast blow to her head. Cheerilee ducked, only for Sneak Attack to cast a quick grappling spell at her front leg that pulled her closer. The teacher tried to evade, but Sneak Attack struck a very fast blow at the side of her head, in just the right spot so that--even if it wasn't a very hard blow--it reverberated through Cheerilee's skull and sent her reeling backwards. She was disoriented, her vision swam, but she knew--because she knew the second half of this particular technique--that he would know she was blind for the moment and so would step up and fire a kick into her face while she couldn't see. So she struck forwards, hoping against hope that she had predicted his move correctly--and even as her vision cleared, she felt her hoof slam into a pony's face.

Sneak Attack sprang back and began circling her again, now with a trickle of blood flowing out of his muzzle. "What we're doing is right. When the public sees what happened, they'll be scared. They'll think twice before they defraud a business, or steal from a shop, or assault a friend in an argument. And we'll keep doing this until all the criminals are gone, all the victims are avenged, and all the other ponies know better than to break the law!"

Cheerilee dropped back, then pistoned her back legs and sprang forwards, absorbing Sneak Attack's attempt to knock her aside and headbutting him. The Shadowbolt staggered backwards. "And all these ponies deserve to be hung for what they did?"

"Just look at them!" Sneak Attack jerked his head at the furthest pillar form the door, which was unlike the rest in that it held two ponies instead of one. Both of its ponies were rough-looking stallions. "The Luca brothers. Mobsters who smuggled salt, weapons, and everything else across borders. Put rival operators in the hospital. Complete monsters through and through. Last week I learned that the government's backing off on their life sentences. They'll get off with fifteen measly years each, because they'll ask their griffin friends to help us deal with Corona." Sneak Attack's eyes flashed. "You know what I think? Slap them around until they give us whatever information we need to make the griffins work with us, then lock 'em away forever, or hang them! Isn't that more likely to get results? Deter crime? Avenge their victims?"

"They're not all like that," said Cheerilee, deflecting a series of attacks and striking back at the Shadowbolt, who slipped to one side before the blow could land. "What about me? I was a hellion in my youth, but if I'd been in jail, who would stop the Tyrant Sun?"

"I'm sure they could find some other mare who represents laughter without resorting to a former criminal." Sneak Attack ducked under Cheerilee's next blow. "This thing ponies like you want to push, where you're so important we have to overlook your crimes? Lies. Other ponies can do what you do without leaving destroyed lives in their wake."

Cheerilee scowled. "What about Twilight Sparkle? You also tried to kill her, and she never destroyed any lives. She--"

"She almost razed your village!"

"Yes, and we forgave her for that. Not only did she help defeat a world-killing abomination that overpowered three separate alicorns, but she's shown herself to be genuinely repetant. She's worked hard to make friends and repay the community for the debt she incurred, and she'd become a brilliant teacher, a skilled librarian--"

"Who cares?" yelled Sneak Atack. "She's a criminal. If you hicks want to forgive her, it just means you don't understand anything about justice." His horn glowed and telekinesis pulled at Cheerilee's legs again, and she had to throw herself back to break his grip and avoid being tugged close enough for him to pummel her. "Maybe it's not fair to her, but was she fair to the ponies whose buildings she wrecked? Is it fair to all the innocents in Equestria that they're at risk of being victims of crime, because we don't prosecute the bad ponies harshly enough? I'd rather be fair to them, than some dilettante heiress who plays with forbidden magic."

Cheerilee said nothing for a moment as she set up her next attack. When she was ready, she said, "For your sake, I hope Luna adjucates your case according to her standards, not your own."

She attacked in a flury of hooves, and the two battled across the room.

***

Max neared the top of the room and then pushed off from the wall, plummeting through space for a moment before he crashed into the side of the catwalks. The impact knocked the breath out of him, but he forced himself to climb upwards and crawl onto the thin paths extending out above the cave. "Okay," he muttered. "Just gotta free these guys--"

A blast of energy sliced over his head and burned into the wall behind him.

Turning, Max saw the pony who had been abducting Snails before--tall, lithe, with a long and pointed horn. His face was still blurred by some spell, as were his coat and mane, but Max could tell from his build it was the same pony. "Hey," said the other pony. "Wanna go for round two?"

Max grit his teeth and ran at the pony, but the catwalks were so narrow he had nowhere to dodge when the enemy shot another blast of magic at him. He took the shot right in the shoulder and was almost blasted off the catwalk, clinging on through sheer force of will. "I'm stopping you," he hissed. "No matter what."

"Big words for a little pony." The enemy fired another blast, which Max managed to dodge by throwing himself backwards. "You're lucky I didn't run you over back in the freight tunnels."

"Luck had nothing to do with it." Max, gritting his teeth, pushed himself to his hooves. His blasts hurt, but they aren't strong enough to throw me off the catwalks, and I'm faster than him. I might be able to just chase him down. "You've hurt innocent ponies of this nation. I'm bringing you in."

"Oh, is that so?" The pony blasted another shot at Max, who cried out in pain as it struck him, but advanced as soon as it was gone. "You're screaming in pain, and you can barely stand. Give up now and I might let you walk away."

"Not going to happen." Max stepped forwards, ignoring the painful, buring feeling from his coat. I hope I'm not actually on fire. He took another few steps forwards, this time pushing through the next energy blast. "Once I set my mind on something, I never give up."

The enemy pony limped backwards a few steps, continuing to fire at Max. "Your funeral."

"Or yours."

When the next blast of energy hit him, Max didn't even flinch as he smashed through it.

***

Raindrops finally launched a perfect shot that hit Goliath in his knee joint, and the pony roared in pain.

"Got you!" hissed Raindrops as she flew over the monster. Then, more loudly, "Stand down! Give up or I"ll destroy you!"

Goliath made no sign of having heard. His horn began to glow, and Raindrops' eyes widened as the mortar blast appeared and then fell at their hooves. Oh no.

The mortar blast sent Goliath rocketing to one side, where he skidded into the ground but got to his hooves in a moment. Raindrops tried to fly away, but she was slow, and while the blast itself didn't hit her she was battered by the rubble it kicked up. Reeling, she crashed to the ground... and heard the familiar hum of another mortar being summoned.

Desperate, she clawed her way back to the air and took off, dodging and weaving in an effort to throw off the shells. She tried to wheel around and get closer to Goliath, but he was filling the air with smaller, weaker blasts that he could summon quickly and were still strong enough to keep her away. She backed, up, working out her next move, then flew through the room as the shells chased her. "COME ON!" she roared.

"Get in close, Raindrops!" called Cheerilee. Both she and Sneak Attack had a few new cuts and bruises, but neither looked seriously hurt yet--at least in Raindrops' snap assessment. Then the weathermare had flown past the duel and headed towards the great big metal door that opened up into the Canterhorn, dodging down just before a blast from Goliath slammed her into the metal. She heard Goliath lumbering after her and circled around the first column from the door to dodge the shrapnel from the next blast. I need to figure out a way to fight this nut. Maybe...

Raindrops swept around, dove under the next blast, and even as it pounded into the column she slammed into Goliath. One hoof connected solidly with the base of his horn, which was starting to glow an ugly brownish-red, and the other punched him square in the throat. Goliath gagged and staggered backwards. Raindrops pressed the advantage, hitting him twice more, and...

And she heard a beeping behind her.

Glancing back, she saw that the explosive charge attached to the column that had been hit was beeping. "Um, Max? I think this one's live!" She flared her wings to rise up and try to rescue the pony, but Goliath tackled her, slamming her into the ground with a growl and shooting pain through her shoulders.

With a cry of pain, Raindrops punched at Goliath's face. "Max! Hurry!"

***

Max had drawn within several feet of his opponent, who was sounding less cocky and more nervous the closer Max got. "You're gonna get it, you hear that?" the pony hissed as he shot off a fast, weak jolt of energy at Max. "You're gonna get it and you're gonna suffer!"

Max grit his teeth as he moved ever closer. The other pony was running out of space to back up. Just a little more. "You're done," he growled. "You're--"

The other pony took another step back, but his injured leg bent and he stumbled. Before he got up, Max had leapt over to him and kicked him down with a direct blow to his face. The pony gasped and his eyes fluttered shut. "Now," hissed Max, knowing that he was probably going to regret taking all those blasts in a few moments. "I'm going to--"

"Um, Max?" called Raindrops. "I think this one's live!"

Max turned and saw that Raindrops was battling with Goliath near a column. The column looked damaged, and Max thought he could hear a distant beeping from that direction. Uh oh.

"Max! Hurry!" Raindrops called.

Knowing the downed pony might be able to attack him again if he woke up, but also knowing that he might not have time to tie up or otherwise secure that pony before the bomb went off, Max grit his teeth and ran towards the column as quickly as he could. When he got there, he bent down and lowered one hoof as far as he could. "Grab on!"

The pony, the cream-colored mare who had noticed Cheerilee earlier, swung a hoof up and gripped Max's. "Thanks, whoever you are."

"Baron Max, of Nulpar." Mounty swung her up, then took his boltcutters and cut the iron chain from around her neck. "Sorry I--"

The bomb exploded below, toppling the column over with a huge crash. Max looked down, but couldn't see either Raindrops or Goliath in the dust and rubble. I hope Raindrops is okay, he thought.

Then the bomb on the next column began to beep.

Max stared. "These things are in series?!" But there was no time to complain. He just ran, dashing over the catwalks to the next column and pulling up the pony--Fetlockson, he saw--before cutting his iron noose. But he had no time to chat; the bomb exploded, the column collapsed, and now the next explosive was beeping. "Get to the end of the catwalks and hide there!" he yelled at the ponies he had rescued before running off again, racing the bombs to the next prisoner.

His body ached all over, he was running on fumes, and there were at least twenty more ponies that needed saving. It looked impossible. But Max just grit his teeth and kept running.

I don't give up, he thought. Not now. Not ever!

***

Cheerilee narrowed her eyes as she saw Sneak Attack's stance. Behind her, columns were exploding, but she had no time to worry about it. That position, he... oh. That little rat. I know what he's doing. She carefully prevented herself from smiling. And how to beat it.

"How can you justify hanging ponies who last did something wrong twenty-five years ago?" she demanded, deliberately leaving herself the slightest opening on her right side.

"How can you justify letting them go?" Sneak Attack feinted left, then attacked right. Cheerilee twisted away, but not fast enough, and the blow struck her exactly at the spot where her front right leg connected to her body. Ponies had a nerve cluster there, and it was as if Sneak Attack had concentrated the full force of a lethal marshal arts blow directly at that nerve. The teacher's world exploded into pain.

"Agh!" Cheerilee didn't have to pretend to be in pain at that one.

Sneak Attack smirked. "Guess they don't teach that one at your weekend dojos."

"I'm still... up..." wheezed Cheerilee. More columns exploded behind her.

"Oh, it might not do too much damage, but I've never seen a bad guy able to shake off that kind of pain." Sneak Attack trotted up. "Here's the damage--"

Cheerilee leapt at him, smashing him in the face with a hoof, knocking him over, and proceding to unleash a flurry of furious blows at him. "Actually," she said, as if correcting a foal who had added two and two and achieved negative twelve, "No, this is the damage. And I do know that move. Fighting through pain is one of the first things I learned at..."

Sneak Attack made no comment; he was too busy trying futilely to deflect Cheerilee's blows.

"Oh, one of those weekend dojo places. Did you learn it?" She smiled thinly. "For your sake, I hope so."

***

Raindrops heard explosions from behind her and, abandoning her plan to break away from Goliath, hugged under his body like a shield. He grasped at her, roared, squeezed hard enough to make stars appears in her eyes--and then cried out as the marble column collapsed on top of him

When the rubble had stopped falling and Goliath had gone still, Raindrops carefully extricated herself from Goliath's body and the debris, just in time to see the next column blow up. Her head was pounding, and the explosions didn't help. Okay. Okay, think. Goliath is down. I need to get up there. But her wings weren't cooperating; they felt oddy heavy. Just a minute to clear my head.

She stood still for a moment, watching Cheerilee get the advantage on Sneak Attack and seeing Max racing across the catwalks. He was staying ahead of the bombs, but only barely, and Raindrops could see him stumbling occasionally as he ran. He's at his limit. But if I fly... She flapped her wings and noted that they seemed to be functioning again. I can get up there, and--

"AAAARGH!"

Raindrops snapped her head over to see Goliath clawing out of the rubble. He was battered, bruised, and bleeding--his coat was matted with blood and dust--but he was still up, and though he stumbled a few times as he rose, this didn't seem to diminish his power in any way. "GRRRAW!"

"What does it take to take you out?" screamed Raindrops as another column collapsed. "I'm getting tired of--"

"GOLIATH!" The voice came from up in the catwalks; Raindrops recognized it as the pony who had sent trains at them earlier that day. "ON THE CATWALKS! BLAST HIM!"

Goliath snapped his head up and began launching a mortar. Raindrops flew at him, but he knocked her aside with a booted hoof. Raindrops cried out as the boot connected with her barrel, and before she knew it she was sliding over the ruined carpet into another pile of marble rubble. "Cheerilee! Help!"

Cheerilee nodded and jumped back. Sneak Attack staggered to his hooves--and then Cheerilee slid under him and gave him a solid kick, one lifting him into the air. She rose on her hind legs, grabbed him, and hurled him across the room just as Goliath fired his mortar blast. It arced up...

Right at Sneak Attack.

The Shadowbolt's horn glowed and the mortar slowed, as if Attack was trying to redirect it with telekinesis. But it exploded before he could get far enough away, and while the blast itself didn't touch Sneak Attack, the shockwave sent him flying. The Shadowbolt was hurled into a wall, where he slid to the ground and collapsed in a heap.

Goliath looked puzzled. "Uh?" he said.

Raindrops didn't answer. Staggering to her hooves, she picked up a big chunk of marble, summoned every last ounce of her strength, and then bashed the brute's head with the rubble.

Goliath was still for a moment, and then his eyes rolled up in his head. "Ow," he said, and collapsed.

Raindrops slowly dropped the piece of marble. Everything hurt, but she knew she had to keep going. After all, the worthless scum up there need my help, she thought to herself with a bite of anger.. "Okay. I'll get up there and help Max--"

A blast of energy sounded from above her head.

***

Max ran past two empty columns, relieved that he'd be able to gain a few seconds by not having to stop and haul anypony up, then dashed for the very last one. Two stallions stood on it, both bulky, both scarred, and both shaking in terror. It took Max a moment to place their faces. "The Lucas," he managed, reaching the catwalk over their heads. "You know, half the city's looking for you."

"Get us out of here!" begged Mareio Luca. "We'll tell you everything we know!"

Max knelt down--and a blast of energy smashed him into the catwalk and then bounced him off it. He fell through empty space for a moment before grabbing onto it with one hoof, the boltcutters almost choking him as their wire wrapped around his neck, and the rest of him dangled through empty space. "No!" he hissed. I can't fall off, not now!

"Give up already!" hissed the enemy, dragging himself and his wounded leg over until he was standing over the Baron. "You're pathetic!"

Max said nothing. The one hoof he still had holding onto the catwalk was starting to slip.

"Did you want to be a hero or something?" The pony stomped on Max's hoof, and the noble cried out. "You're weak. You're pathetic. But you think you're a good enough fighter to beat me?" He chuckled as the column behind him, the last empty column, exploded. "If you knew who I was you'd know you were doomed. I'm one of the best warriors in Equestria. But you? You're no fighter at all."

"No, I'm not." Max shut his eyes. This is going to hurt. "I don't fight."

"So--"

"I endure." Max heaved himself up with one leg and grabbed the pony with his other front leg, then pulled as hard as he could. The pony screamed as he was dragged off the catwalk and hurled down, barely managing to grab onto the column before plummeting to his doom.

Max hurled himself backwards and also landed on the platform--saw there was no time to climb back up and save the Lucas by pulling them up--then cut their nooses with his boltcutters and yelled, "Climb up! Get on my back!" Mareio clambered onto his back, leapt, grabbed the catwalk--the enemy attacked him with a savage kick, but Max absorbed it and shoved him, knocking him almost off the column--Manetelli was climbing up, using Max's back as a stepping stool to pull himself to safety--Max reached up, yelling, "Lower your hoof! Pull me up!"

The Lucas looked at each other, then ran.

And then the column exploded.

No! Max felt himself falling, saw the catwalk receeding as if a giant were taking it away. No, no no no, I can't die here! I have so many mountains to climb, and there's Posey, and... Thoughts of the Duchess filled his mind. I can't stop now! I--

Then he felt somepony grabbing him, and then Raindrops was landing with him in her hooves, and he looked up and saw that all the ponies had gotten off the pillars and all the enemies were defeated even as the last column finished collapsing behind him. For a moment, he couldn't believe it. "I'm not dead," he managed. Although, if Posey sees me like this, I might well be... I hope she's not the jealous type...

"Not for lack of trying," Raindrops said.

Cheerilee trotted over. "All bad guys defeated!" she chirped. "Shall we get the prisoners out of here?"

Max smiled. He knew he would hurt very badly very soon, but for now, he'd enjoy the victory. "Sounds like a plan, Dame Cheerilee."

***

Raindrops looked at the defeated ponies before her and told herself that she should let go of her anger.

Yes, she'd been battered and beaten in order to save a bunch of worthless criminals. Yes, the Lucas and several of the others probably deserved, if not to hang, than to suffer much worse punishments than they received. Yes, she'd had to backburner Snails even as the foal suffered from the slings and arrows of his classmates. Yes, it was manifestly unfair. But...

"It's over," she breathed. Goliath and Sneak Attack had been securely bound with wire and thrown into one corner, the same would happen to their third opponent once they dug him out of the rubble of the collapsed column, and Cheerilee had found the recessed stairwell up to the catwalks and was now leading the prisoners to the safety of the ground. "It's over," she told herself. "Just... calm down. Let it go. Get back to Snails."

She heard chuckling behind her and turned to see Sneak Attack looking at her through two black eyes.

"Idiot..." he hissed. "You're the knight with the little brother... do you have any idea whose lives you saved? The Lucas--"

"Yeah, they're terrible, I know. Shut up."

Sneak Attack chuckled, a harsh and violent sound. "I've been watching Stompina today. Y'know what she did once you saw her? She put a tail on you. Knew you'd lead her right to the Lucas."

"If she shows up, we'll pound her too."

"Oh, she won't show up here. Your brother seems to be absent right now, isn't he?" The Shadowbolt grinned. "Stompina'll find him. She's a... trader, you could say. One brother for two brothers. That's how she rolls."

Raindrops shut her eyes to avoid her vision clouding into a sea of red. "Shut up."

"What, upset that the ponies who lives you worked so hard to save are the same ponies who'd attack your brother? Throw him in a cage? Threaten to kill him if you don't give back the Lucas? And then--"

Raindrops brought up one hoof and slammed it into Sneak Attack's head. The Shadowbolt fell silent.

Then Raindrops turned and--without saying a word--trotted over to where the former prisoners were descending the staircase. She nodded briefly to Cheerilee and to Max, who had gotten back to his hooves and was trying to conduct a census of who had been captured and why. Mareio Luca was at the end of the group; when he had climbed all the way down and was back on the ground level, Raindrops waited for the others to get ahead, then grabbed him and slammed him against the wall.

"Does your organization ever take foals hostage in order to force their parents to do something?" she asked.

Mareio stared up at Raindrops. He was a big stallion, but he seemed cowed by Raindrops' presence nonetheless. "Uh..."

"Answer me," said Raindrops, in as calm a voice as she could manage.

"Hey!" said Manetelli, but when he approached Raindrops she shoved him away and he fell over. He was too drained by captivity to fight. "I--"

"Shut up." Raindrops turned back to Mareio. "You: answer me. Now."

Mareio seemed to be debating whether to lie or not. "It's been known to happen," he said at last. "I think Parley tried that in Ponyville. But, uh, I've never done anything like that--"

Raindrops said nothing, but her blazing eyes spoke for her.

Mareio pressed his back against the wall. "Look, if you have some personal greviance..."

Raindrops saw Mareio as if through a reddish mist. She said nothing. She just approached him until they were standing muzzle to muzzle, then gently pressed a hoof against his throat.

Mareio's eyes were wide. "Look, I'll confess to everything! I'll go to jail! No deal or anything! I'll go away forever!"

Raindrops pressed against his throat--lightly, but noticeably. "Look," she growled. "I just fought a bunch of ponies who think it's okay to kill thieves, forgers, smugglers, and bookies. And they're probably wrong about that. But for ponies like you?"

Her eyes narrowed.

"Maybe they had the right idea."

Author's Note

Sneak Attack would probably be a Kira supporter. I'm just sayin'.

Next time, the answer to all your outstanding questions! Like: what will happen to Twilight? What happened between Notary and Greengrass? Will Luna be displeased by Fisher's rather ineffective response to the crisis? How will Raindrops and Snails reunite? Oh yeah, and, Will Raindrops kill a guy? All this and more in the thrilling conclusion!

Just Desserts

"Raindrops?"

The weathermare barely registered the voice next to him. Her gaze had narrowed until all she could see was Mareio's trembling visage. Dimly, she heard a soft growling sound and knew that it was coming from her own throat, but she didn't care. Let's see you suffer a fraction of what you've put all of us through!

"Raindrops."

Raindrops brought her head a little closer to Mareio, as if about to bite his head off. She increased the pressure on his throat by a tiny amount. The mafioso gulped and said something that she didn't care to listen to.

"Raindrops!"

The words finally broke through the weathermare's focus. "What?" she snapped, looking to her side. Cheerilee was there, a concerned expression on her face.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Nothing." Raindrops turned back to Mareio, who squeaked slightly. "Don't worry about it."

Cheerilee's hoof touched her shoulder. "It's over," she said, in a calm but firm voice. "We're done. We can stop fighting now."

"It's not over," Raindrops murmured. "How can it be over? He hasn't paid for what he's done yet."

"He will. We'll take him to jail--"

"Jail?!" It was as if the single word had broken through the last of Raindrops' self-restraint. She whipped her head around and glowered at Cheerilee, eyes blazing. "Yeah, that's worked real well so far, hasn't it! Not one of these corrupt donkeyspawn paid for their crimes so far, but I'm sure they'll start now! I'm sure if we drag this smuggler, this hitcolt, this beast back to jail, Luna won't send him on his way in a week with a gold star for good behavior!" She was pushing Mareio hard enough that he was pinned against the wall. "How do you know he'll actually get punished this time?"

"Because I'll make sure of it." Baron Max, trotted up behind Cheerilee. He seemed to have recovered most of his demeanor, and despite his cuts, his bruises, and the utter mess that had been made of his coat and mane, he stood noble and strong. "Raindrops, I will personally assure you that I will monitor each and every one of the cases here--and should I see anypony getting off easy undeservedly, I will protest it until the matter is resolved. I will not let any of them skate unjustly."

"'Unjustly?' What, so there's some way for them to get off that's just?" snapped Raindrops. "if you really wanted to enforce justice you'd tell me you'd see to it that they get locked up forever!"

Max shook his head. "A life sentence might not be the result, but--"

"Why should they get a second chance at life after they spent so much time ruining other pony's first chance at lives? Who cares if they repent when they get out?" Tears were forming in Raindrops' eyes. "Mareio said they'd be willing to abduct foals if that's what it took to get out of jail. I don't care if he's sorry now! Get rid of all of them--"

"Does that include," said Cheerilee, in a quiet voice, "Ponies who maim schoolyard bullies?"

Raindrops' voice caught for a moment. "That's different," she said, in a low voice. "I was a foal then. The Lucas and all the others here aren't. They're grown. They know what they're doing." Except Goliath... but I wasn't talking about him! How can they possibly object if I rough Mareio up a bit? Her eyes narrowed. I'll bet a broken leg would get him to think long and hard before he hurt anypony else!

"Okay," said Max. "Does that include me?"

"I'm talking about criminals, Baron, not random ponies that annoy me."

Max nodded. "Yes. And Princess Luna criticized all her nobles--myself included--for our criminal actions and misconduct." He paused. "I was part of that, and I deserved it."

"You? What did you do?"

"Something that Luna, legally, could have stripped me of my title for." Max paused. "Do you want me in jail, Raindrops? Or dead?" He did not add, 'What would have happened to Snails in the train station had I not been there and fought to protect him?' He didn't need to.

"Look," said Raindrops after a few moments. "This isn't the case of one mistake. This guy had a career based around breaking the law!"

"So did I." Raindrops looked to her other side, where a cream-colored pony with the remains of glasses around her ears was approaching. "Used to, anyway."

"Do I know you?"

"Duty Enpay. Cheerilee and I go way back."

Raindrops curled her lips. "The smuggler. The one who got away with it."

"Uh huh. Wanna know why?"

"Let me guess. You said you were real sorry."

"No." Duty glanced at Cheerilee, looking slightly nervous, but the teacher nodded encouringly. "There's a city in the Crystal Empire that sits in a valley amidst the mountains. Three years ago, they got hit by a plague. It shot through them so quickly it almost totaled the populace of the city. The few crystal ponies still healthy enough to fight quarantined the place and sealed off the passes so it wouldn't spread, even put in some kind of impenetrable cloud overhead so nopony could fly in or out. Of course, that meant once Equestria came up with medicine, we had no way of getting it to them." She approached Raindrops. "I knew the secret routes through the mountains. When Luna asked if there was anypony who could save the city, I volunteered. I knew she'd find out I was a smuggler--no other pony would know those routes. I didn't care. There were tens of thousands of lives on the line.

"I ran the medicine through the blockades, through some of the most impassable mountains in any settled nation. I ran the blockades, knowing that if the medicine didn't work, if there had been a mistake, I'd only be infecting myself too. But I made it, and I delivered the medicine. And that's why, when I returned to Equestria, Luna told me that my punishing for years of ignoring tariffs laws and border patrols was a few months in jail and not to do it anymore."

"That's different," hissed Raindrops. "That--it's not like what this guy and his brother did!"

Max gestured at Goliath and Sneak Attack, both unconscious at one side of the room. "So you agree with them?"

"No! I--look." Raindrops took a long breath. "Maybe they're wrong about Duty and Aranqueur and the other small-timers. Maybe those ponies only deserve jail. But this guy? Him?!" She shook Mareio, who squealed. "He's willing to hurt foals to get what he wants! He's willing to hurt Snails! His ponies might have already done so! Snails has suffered all day because of these ponies, because of Sneak Attack and Goliath and every single pony they captured! He doesn't deserve that! Why should Snails have to keep suffering for their sakes? Why can't they suffer for once?"

"Raindrops. You don't want to hurt Mareio," said Cheerilee quickly. "You're upset because Snails was in danger today, because of a bunch of bad circumstances. I understand that. But--"

"Even now, Snails could be in Stompina's hooves because of ponies like him!" Raindrops was almost screaming. "Maybe I want my little brother to have a good life without worrying about ponies like him! There's nothing wrong with that!"

Cheerilee gently turned Raindrops' head so they were looking at each other. "Do you want Snails to live in a world in which any pony he offends can decide for themselves that he should suffer?" She swept a hoof out at the rubble, the ruined furnishings, the destroyed columns, and the shaking prisoners who had been within moments of death. "Is this the world you want to prepare for your brother?"

Raindrops said nothing for a long moment. Her tears continued to spatter against the ground, but otherwise, the mare was silent.

And then, with a roar that almost shook the room, she slammed both forehooves at Mareio--but punched them into the concrete wall behind the stallion, driving through it and not stopping until she had touched the rock of the Canterhorn. She screamed for almost a full minute, because she did despise the criminals and vigilantes in the room--as much as Sneak Attack, if not more--but she knew that, if she indulged her anger, she'd only be hurting the ponies she loved. She knew that it wasn't worth it to hurt any of them--not the criminals, not anymore, rationally she knew they were not responsible for having been abducted--not atGoliath, who had the mind of a foal and was not responsible for any of this--not Sneak Attack, a pathetic lump at the side of the room who was not worth the effort of detesting--because, if she did, it would hurt Snails and the other innocents who would suffer in a culture that accepted vigilantes as justice. She hated them... but she wouldn't act on her anger. Because, as much as she hated them, she loved Snails far more.

Cheerilee hugged her, absorbing her few spasms and resting the weathermare's head on her shoulder. "It's okay," she said. "it's okay."

"It's not okay. He's my brother, I'm supposed to look out for him--"

"You helped protect him from ponies that some of the city's strongest criminals couldn't even put up a fight again. You beat Goliath to keep him safe." Cheerilee smiled slightly. "You did fine."

"But he... he's innocent and pure and I let him get hurt--"

"You saved him, again and again." Cheerilee hugged her friend. "And if you don't believe me, we'll go back to Greengrass's garden right now and he can tell you himself."

"What if the mafia attacked?"

"Then Carrot Top fought them off. Raindrops, Snails is my student. I care for him too. Do you honestly think I would leave him anywhere that I didn't know was safe?" She paused. "And I think you know it too, or you wouldn't have let us leave him there either. We'd have found somewhere else if we had to. We knew we didn't have to."

Raindrops said nothing. She felt very empty, all of a sudden. Rationally, she knew it was unlikely the mafia had found Snails, and even less likely that they had taken him--Greengrass had destroyed the crane in the freight tunnels so he was clearly a capable fighter; Twilight was brilliant and could probably be useful even without magic; and Carrot Top had battled alicorns, demon rams, and the other assorted monsters that had threatened Equestria. Scruffy mobsters wouldn't threaten them. But she still couldn't help but worry. "I just--"

With a blast of magic, a piece of parchment appeared in front of them. Cheerilee reached over and plucked it up. "Looks like Twilight got the ring off," she said merrily.

"Huh?" said Raindrops.

"Twilight just teleported us a message. It says that Carrot Top helped her get the ring off with a potion to drain her magic. and now she can teleport Carrot Top and herself here to help us fight--or just teleport us healing potions if we need them. We just need to write down anything we want on the back of this letter, and it will teleport back to her in--"

"Did the mafia attack?" asked Raindrops. "Does it say?"

Cheerilee looked back down at the letter. "Yes. Some ponies showed up and tried to abduct Carrot Top and Snails--"

Raindrops' mouth dropped.

"But the good ponies won. The mafia was defeated, and Twilight, Carrot Top, and Snails are unhurt." Cheerilee smiled. "See? I--"

The rest of her words were cut off by a bone-crushing hug.

***

After that, all that remained was wrapping up.

There had been one hiccup as Max tried to organize the prisoners to get out of the airship docking bay. Manetelli Luca, grabbing a short razor from the tool cabinets at the side of the room, had seized the aged Fetlockson and tried to escape with him as a hostage. The remaining Elements and Max were so worn from their earlier fights that Luca might even have been able to escape--but no sooner had Manetelli left through the maintenance door that he found himself in the hooves of the prison guards Max had summoned. They had arrived several minutes after the Elements and had set up a perimeter while figuring out what to do next; as a result, Manetelli Luca was once again apprehended before he could escape to continue his life of crime. After that, none of the prisoners gave them any trouble.

Two guards remained in the airship docking bay to sift through the rubble and look for the third abductor, the one that had apparently been buried; the rest worked with Max and the Elements to get the abductors, ex-cons, and criminals to the main Guard station of the city. Ultimately, the Elements, Max, and five of the guards walked with the vigilante's victims, one carried the unconscious Sneak Attack, and the last four lugged Goliath. They did have to wait for a few more minutes once they reached the Guard station, as Archduke Fisher and his Factory Security forces had just arrived with twenty bound cultists, a newly-recaptured Soleil Supreme, and enough captured explosives to level half of Canterlot Castle. Fisher had seemed overjoyed at his victory, and had gone on about how his forces had stopped the Sun Cult and saved every pony in the city. His expression quickly changed, though, when Max made his way through the crowd and presented the captive Lucas, the ponies that Fisher had shut down the city to find, to the Guards. Neither of the Elements had been able to resist chuckling--or outright laughing when Carrot Top and Greengrass showed up with a cart full of more unconscious mafia ponies, including the Canterlot boss Stompina, whom Fisher's forces had utterly failed to find. It wasn't a good day for the Archduke in terms of publicity.

By the time the Elements, Greengrass and Max returned to the warehouse, the city was coming to life again, the Friendship Express was rolling out of the train station, and the sun was starting to set. Raindrops, however, did not notice any of this. She found her pace quickening as she approached the warehouse until she was flying down the stairs. "Snails!" she called. "Snails, I'm back! Snails--"

The little colt jumped on her just as she pulled out of the stairwell, and the two rolled to the ground in the middle of Greengrass' prized begonias, smiling and hugging and having a blast.

"Did you save the day, sis?" asked Snails. "Twilight said so, but I wanna hear it from you!"

"I sure did." Raindrops ruffled Snails' mane. "Beat up the big bad ponies. They won't hurt anypony ever again."

"How big?"

"Oh, they were big alright. I've gotta tell you about the one I fought some time." Raindrops sat up. "And how'd you do? Feeling better?"

Snails bobbed his head up and down. "Uh huh."

"Think you're a good little brother?"

"Oh, I'm a great little brother. In fact, I think you're lucky to have me around!" Snails laughed and then began running circles around Raindrops. "I'm good with bugs and I know cool magic and when I grow up I'm gonna use all my skills to do really awesome stuff!"

"Glad to hear it!" Raindrops held out a hoof and caught Snails, then began tickling him. She knew that the other Element,s Max, Twilight, and even Greengrass were looking at them with bemused expressions, but didn't care. "What changed?"

Snails laughed until Raindrops stopped tickling, then said, "Carrot Top and Mr. Greengrass and Miss Twilight showed me how even really silly talents can be way cool!"

Raindrops looked up to see the three ponies in question exchanging glances. Greengrass finally said. "I'm not sure I'd phrase it quite like that, but yes, we did demonstrate how 'weeding' and 'herbology--'"

"And physics!" chimed in Twilight.

"Yes, that too, were useful in fighting some very mean ponies. He seemed to take it well."

Raindrops looked back at Snails, who was grinning as he nuzzled up against her foreleg. "Yeah, I'd say so."

Baron Max watched the scene for a moment, then turned to Cheerilee and waved her aside. "Dame Cheerilee, a word?"

"Yes?" asked the teacher.

"I just wanted to say..." He took a breath. "Look, I know the government wasn't terribly helpful today. Frankly, it was almost useless. And so, I want to apologize." He bowed. "Both for the failure of the Court and for my own own earlier attitude. I... know I was dismissive of your feelings when you said you did not see any point in asking the Guards or the Court for help. Now I know why you did it."

Cheerilee thought for a moment. "It's true that our interactions with the government have typically been less than useful. Your help, however, was invaluable. If we had refused to work with you, Snails might have been captured... and we might not have been able to find the abductors' hideout at all, let alone defeat them in combat. And if you hadn't gotten those prison guards, I'm not sure we could have stopped Manetelli Luca from escaping" She bowed her own head. "Thank you for providing the government resources of yourself, your guards, and your records."

Max blushed. "There's no need--"

"Wait." Cheerilee raised up again and smiled. "In the future, you don't need to worry--I promise that we'll at least make an effort to enlist government resources for this kind of thing before doing it on our own."

The Baron slowly nodded. "And for my part... I will continue doing whatever I can to improve the government such that it becomes more useful. So that the situations last year with the relief funds in Ponyville, or the one today with the Guards all being unavailable, never happen again." He smiled faintly. "It'll probably take a long time. But I won't back down. I'll keep going--and so will the other good nobles in the Court, such as Duchess Posey, Vicereine Wallflower, and so forth. We'll get it done."

"I believe you, Max." The two bumped hooves.

Across the garden, Greengrass was looking ruefully over his garden. Most of the plants had survived, but the casualties... torn out by the roots for Carrot Top's potions, crushed by stampeding mafia ponies, even eaten by a certain unicorn foal who had apparently gotten peckish. "My garden," he sighed. "Alas, I barely knew ye."

"Excuse me." Greengrass turned to see Raindrops and Carrot Top, with Snails perched on his sister's back. Carrot Top smiled politely, then continued, saying, "We'd like to say something."

The gardener straightened. "Certainly."

Raindrops took a breath. "I still don't like you," she said. "What you did to Ponyville, and what you tried to do to Lyra, Carrot Top, all of us... it's unconscionable. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive that." She paused. "But you did fight to protect Snails. You kept him safe from the mob."

"And you did help me realize how I could be useful even if I'm not great at hoofcuffs," said Carrot Top. "Albeit in a rather insulting way. So we wanted to thank you--" began Carrot Top.

"While first pointing out that 'not turning a foal over to organized crime' is not exactly a high ethical bar to leap over," interjected Raindrops.

Carrot Top nodded. "Yes. With that in mind--thank you."

"Oh. Well, it was my pleasure, really." Greengrass gave a slight wave of his hoof. "Happy to help the sibling of Equestria's greatest heros and all that. I'm sure you'd have done the same if I had a little brother."

"Of course," said Carrot Top, cutting off Raindrops. "We would."

Greengrass smiled slightly, then turned back to his damaged garden.

Twilight watched the scenes, slowly letting her smile fade away from her face. Finally, she knew she couldn't wait any longer. She approached Max. "I guess I should get to that hearing now. For inadvertently violating my house arrest."

Max turned from Cheerilee and looked at Twilight. "Right, that. Yes. I'll walk you to the station myself. Don't worry. I'll see to it that they understand what happened. You were lied to by Sneak Attack. They can't hold that against you."

The mage nodded. "Thanks."

Max began to walk Twilight to the door. "I can personally testify to what happened, to Sneak Attack redirecting your mail, everything. No reasonable judge would hold it against you."

"Which judge do you think I'll get?"

"Probably the same one who tried your case originally. Or--"

"Actually, it will be Princess Luna Herself."

Max stopped talking and looked at the Night Guard who had entered the garden. So did everypony else.

The Night Guard smiled and bowed. "My apologies. Princess Luna has just returned and she desires to speak with you at her earliest convenience. She's been given to understand that you were behind some of the... events of the day, and would love to know more."

"Understand? From who?" asked Raindrops.

"Oh, you know. Prison guards, clerks, postal employees, a few ex-cons who seem to think you had a little more to do with saving their lives than the esteemed Archduke Fisher." The Night Guard turned and inclined her head. "She'd love to hear all about it from the seven of you."

Snails did a quick count. "Seven? Even me?"

"Of course!" the Night Guard said. "Even you."

The foal grinned. "I get to see the princess! AWESOME!"

He began to scamper after the Night Guards. With varying degrees of smiles, the rest followed.

***

"...so that's what happened," finished Raindrops.

Princess Luna Equestris, sitting atop her throne, nodded slightly. She had asked each of the seven ponies to describe the events they had seen and participated in that day, from when they awoke until when Luna summoned them. "Very well," she said. "Thank you for your testimonies. I am ready to render judgement."

The ponies looked at each other. "Judgement?" echoed Max.

Luna flapped her wings and got to her hooves. "Of course," she said. "Dames, I would like to begin with you. Dames Raindrops, Cheerilee, and Carrot Top. Approach."

The three knights stepped forwards.

"Once again, you have done your nation proud. Your conduct has been brave, righteous, noble... in a word, admirable." Luna smiled at the three ponies. "You have saved twenty-five lives, including those of two ponies behind you in the train tunnels, and have brought monstrous criminals to justice. Once more, the nation is in your debt." And she bowed her head.

Raindrops blushed. "Uh, thank you--"

"We accept your praise with gratitude, Princess Luna," said Cheerilee. She bowed so low her head almost touched the ground. "We are honored."

"It is I who is honored," Luna nodded at the Elements. "You may withdraw. Snails, come forth!"

Snails, looking very puzzled approached. "Um, yes Princess?"

"Though still a foal, you provided a vital piece of evidence which allowed for your sister and her colleagues to determine the identify of one of the abductors. This was a crucial piece of information needed to resolve the case. I thank you for your service as well."

Snails blushed a bright scarlet. "Uh, uh, you're welcome, your royal, uh, majesticness! I mean, uh--"

Luna laughed. "In addition, as your actions were not only courageous and noble but both far more so than your years, I am willing to consider a request for a royal boon."

"A boon?" Snails blinked. "Um..."

"It means a gift," chimed in Twilight. "A present."

Raindrops blinked. Please don't ask for some gigantic bug that's going to rampage through Ponyville, eat all our food, and abduct other foals. Even if it abducts Diamond Tiara.

Snails furrowed his brow in deep thought. "I'm thinking," he said, as if worried about being timed. "I'm thinking--"

"Take your time," said Luna. "I would not want you to rush such a request."

"It's just--there's two things I want and I don't know what to ask for!" Snails turned to Raindrops, then looked back at Luna. "Can I ask my big sister? She's really smart!"

Luna grinned. "You may."

Snails nodded and turned to Raindrops. "Okay, so my first idea is--a really cool bug! A bug that has cool powers, and is totally awesome, and that nopony in Ponyville's ever seen before! One that would make a great friend!" He paused. "And the other thing was a spell that would let me eat all the ice cream I wanted without getting a headache. Raindrops, which do you think is better?"

There was silence for a moment--and then Luna laughed. "I can manage both of those, young Snails. You will have your boons within a week. You may withdraw."

Snails, looking like his brithday had come early and had involved a free trip to the mythical Isle of Gigantic Bugs, bounced backwards.

"Twilight Sparkle," said Luna. "Step forwards."

The mage did so. "Princess Luna? If I may--I know I violated my house arrest, I know I shouldn't have, but please--"

Luna looked at her with a gentle smile. "Twilight Sparkle, do you honestly believe I would punish a pony for something that was in no way her fault?"

Twilight shook her head no, a few tears falling onto the floor. "No. Thank you, your Highness."

"But I wish to speak of another matter. After learning the true situation, many ponies would have tried to hide the problem by fleeing back to Ponyville, thereby hoping to prevent anypony from noticing a violation of their house arrest, however accidental. However, you remained and chose to follow the lawful procedure for what to do when this situation arises. My understanding is you would have followed that procedure even if you had been required to turn yourself in immediately."

"Yes, your Highness. I... I've learned to stop running from my problems."

"You certainly have." Luna smiled again and tilted her head upwards, as if thinking. "When is your next shift at the Ponyville library?"

"Ah... two days from now, starting at nine in the morning."

"Well, when considering your exemplary conduct today, your growth over the last six months, and the truly excellent reports I have received on your conduct from the Ponyville Town Council... provided you return to Ponyville in time for your next shift, you may spend tomorrow at your parents' estate in Canterlot. I am sure they will be--"

Twilight's eyes immediately began to water. "Thank you!" she gasped. "Princess, thank you so much! I--I promise I'll make the most of this opportunity."

"Excellent. You may withdraw." Luna turned to one of the two remaining ponies. "Baron Maximus. Step forwards." When he was kneeling in front of her, she said, "Baron, your conduct too has been exemplary. You worked tirelessly for the ponies in this city, fought for justice heedless of personal risk to yourself, and assisted the Elements in saving several lives. For once again embodying the nobility that I hope to see in our Court--I thank you."

"Thank you, Princess!" said Max.

"However, I would ask a question." Luna paused, and then her horn flashed, producing a silvery dome around the noble and the princess. Max realized that he couldn't hear anything outside the dome, and guessed that they were now safe from being heard by the others as well. Luna added, "This is the second time in six months in which you have been involved in an... adventure like this. And, of course, I am familiar with a few other, more minor adventures in that time span. Do you enjoy them?"

Max had to think about it. "They tend to hurt, but... each time I've gone on one of these quests, I've saved lives or helped ponies. Yes, I enjoy that."

The alicorn nodded. "When I... ennobled you, Baron Max, I was thinking primarily of the benefit you would bring to the Court. I confess that I perhaps did not consider your own desires as much as I should have. If you would prefer to serve the ponies of this nation by battling those who would hurt them in a more... direct manner, I would not want to stand in your way."

Max paused. "I don't understand."

"If you desire, I am willing to make you a knight errant instead of a noble. You would be free to wander the land, fighting monsters and villains as you did today--and as you did six months ago, with the Opelick conspirators. I can find another pony to govern Nulpar." She smiled. "I hope you will decline this offer. You have done much good for Equestria on the Court, and I anticipate you doing still more. But if it would make you happy, Max, I will make the switch. You have earned it..."

She trailed off. Max was clearly struggling to avoid laughter. "I fali to see the humor in this situation."

"It's only... that's the same argument Greengrass made to me right after the Opelick thing, when he was trying to talk me into leaving the Court. He said I'd be happier wandering around and saving foals that fell into wells, than doing paperwork in Canterlot."

Luna said nothing for several moments. When she spoke again, it was with a very un-princesslike, "Seriously?"

Max got himself under control and nodded. "My answer is the same. I won't deny that I liked saving the would-be victims of the Opelick ponies by punching the cultists more than I enjoyed writing a bill for the Night Court. But I know that the bill will do more good than personally shutting down even a dozen criminal groups. I can help more ponies by learning to pass good laws and repeal evil ones than I could by patrolling the nation and looking for criminals to kick." He smiled. "I am learning to enjoy how the things I do effect the ponies of this nation, to feel happy after rewriting a bill for the twelfth time and getting it right so that, once it passes, it will improve the lives of as many ponies as possible. That's what I want, Princess. To maintain my post and continue to do whatever I can to improve the lives of the ponies of this nation. That's what's best for everypony, and soon, that's what will make me the happiest as well."

The alicorn looked at him for a moment and then grinned. "Very well. I am glad you feel that way. But--in that case--I think I will assign a few Guards to your staff that you can use for... investigative purposes. I'm sure Duchess Posey wouldn't mind you being able to send in some trained ponies the next time you uncover a criminal conspiracy, instead of going yourself."

Max blushed, remembering how Fragrant had reacted the last time he'd been kicked around when fighting the Opelick conspirators--and the reaction she'd have now if she saw him like this. "Thank you, Princess."

Luna dropped the shield and sent him back. "And finally, Greengrass. You too defended innocents today, risking your own safety when battling the mob, and also the crane operator in the freight tunnels. Your heroism is appreciated."

"Oh, you know me," said Greengrass. "If there's a chance to do something honorable and dangerous, then by gum, I'm there."

"We are sure," said Luna. "It would be wrong for you to suffer for your heroic actions. I will ask the castle gardeners to visit your garden and restore it to its full glory."

There was silence for a moment.

Then Greengrass smiled brilliantly. "Actually, as long as you're considering requests...?"

"I will listen to a request, if you have one."

"Then might I suggest, in view of my stunningly meritorious conduct, that you restore my influence in the Court? All I request is a few words simply stating that you support me, and I could manage the rest."

Luna closed her eyes for a moment. "Duke... you know that this is not how I run my Court."

"But--"

"Furthermore," she said, almost gently, "While your actions today were meritorious, and I am truly glad to see how you have changed since the Gala... it cannot entirely make up for your earlier misdeeds. As much as I want to see you fulfill your dreams, just as I wish for every single one of my subjects to do the same, it would be unjust for me to exempt you from the consequences of your own actions" She smiled slightly. "I too have made mistakes, and have learned to live with the results. Duke Greengrass, you must do the same. Move forwards. Use the power and prestige you retain in order to improve Equestria. I am confident you can still do much for the nation if you turn your talents towards good."

For a moment, silence filled the room--and Max understood why today was supposed to be the worst day of Greengrass's life so far. Greengrass was still smiling, still standing strong, but underneath it, he suddenly looked almost broken. Greengrass...

"Thank you for your testimonies," the princess said to the room at large. "I believe I now must deal with some other affairs... including that of a certain Minister of War. Elements, Snails, you are invited to reside in the Castle overnight if you wish. Twilight, a Guard will escort you to your parent's estate." She rose. "Good day."

Greengrass was out the door first, speaking to nopony as he hurried away. Max paused, glanced at the knights--and then hurried after him.

***

The Fisher Estate was a stately old building high up on the Canterhorn, overlooking the city of Canterlot and the plains of Equestria beyond it. Archduke Fisher rarely used it; he took pride in eschewing luxury and frequently noted how his living quarters were little different than those of the middle-class citizens in his province. The estate, built by Fisher's grandfather, was elegant and luxurious, and thus generally ignored by Fisher unless he had to entertain important guests. But this night was an exception.

Fisher stormed into the estate and flung his hammer to the ground in a rage, not even noticing that it cracked the stone floor. Patches of his fur were blackened, his armor was dinged and burned, and he was missing a chunk of hair from his tail--Soleil had fought hard--but he didn't even seem to notice. "How dare she?" he hissed. "After all that I did! That pathetic absent old nag!"

"Sir?" Volk, Fisher's bodyguard, followed him into the Estate. "What happened?"

"Princess Luna thinks I went too far," Fisher growled. "Too far! Too far in protecting the lives of her idiotic knights!"

Volk said nothing.

Fisher slammed a hoof into the wall. "I tried to tell her that I caught Soleil, that I shut down the Sun Cult presence in the city. That they would have killed hundreds had I not intervened. She didn't want to hear any of it! Do you know what she said? That my actions were reprehensible because I almost let a bunch of worthless criminals die!" His voice steadily grew into a roar. "As if a bunch of criminals could possibly matter as much as the ELEMENTS OF HARMONY!"

"Sir, please. Calm yourself. You're the Archduke of Rushia, you're justly revered for all your selfless acts supporting the nation. This will blow over."

"Will it?" Fisher gave Volk a black look. "Captain Armor formally petitioned Luna to remove me from my post as Minister of War. She told me that she is accepting the petition. Viceroy Night Light will take over as the interim Minister of War until they find a permanent replacement, which could take months! And in the meantime, Night Light..." Fisher trailed off into an inarticulate growl.

"Well, he's been responsible for keeping the griffins out--"

"Corona is another matter entirely! It's one thing to deal with a bunch of scruffy birdbrains. If they ever attacked, Luna Herself could annihilate their armies. That tends to keep them... wary of provoking us. But the Tyrant Sun? She has no such fear of our strength. Viceroy Night Light is not prepared to engage such a foe." Fisher shook his head. "Nopony is... except for me."

Silence stretched across the room. Volk eventually ventured, "Sir, you still have influence. This isn't the end of the world--"

"Isn't it?" Fisher's voice settled into a soft, hateful tempo. "It was I who worked twenty-one hour days designing the weapons and armor that our soldiers use. I who invested millions of my own bits in my Arms and Armor research labs, not to mention investing in every other technology that makes Equestria strong. Every military advance in the last twenty years has come, indirectly or directly, from me! I am the rock upon which Equestria rests! Without me, there would be NOTHING!"

The Archduke approached Volk. "If I'd wanted to, Volk, I could have had an easy life of luxury. I'm smarter than Night Light; I could have forced him out and made Viceroy years ago. I could have lived a life of hedonistic dissipation. But I refused. Because--unlike every single other pony in that Court--I understand my duty. I know that a noble must be willing to sacrifice for the nation! Those noble fools who think themselves generous, because they're willing to give a little of their money to charity--I'd give all of my money, my sleep, my health, my freedom, even my life for this nation! Would any of them be willing to do that? Which ones? Would Viceroy Night Light break the law and risk incarceration if it had to be done, if not doing so would result in another nation obtaining a key military advantage over us? Would Vicereine Puissance give up one jangle if it would prevent the Tyrant from killing us all? Would Duchess Posey be willing to die for the citizenry? Would the esteemed Baron Max be willing to give of his conscience, do something he felt was wrong in order to serve a greater good? No? Then they are not qualified to rule! And they most certanly are incapable of DEFENDING EQUESTRIA!"

He said nothing for a few moments, looking out over the city. "The Tyrant is coming, Volk," he said at last. "She will not hide forever. Already she is marshalling her forces. If we do not have a noble at the helm who is prepared to do what must be done, who is willing to sacrifice everything he has in order to achieve our salvation... we are doomed."

"Well, at least you'll still be free to protest," said Volk. "I mean, you can petition--"

"Free? Oh, didn't i tell you? It seems those abductions that Baron Max were looking into were actually real. And being caused by one of my ponies. Goliath. Princess Luna advised me to retain counsel, just in case her investigation turns up 'evidence' that I was more involved."

"But..." Volk's face grew pensive. "Goliath doesn't have the brains to abduct anypony on his own. He might hit 'em, sure, but--"

"He was working with a Shadowbolt--who, incidentally, was investigating my properties in the city before he went rogue, if you can believe that--and one unidentified pony that they're trying to dig out of an airship docking bay." Fisher shook his head. "My mining security chief, my Shadowbolt, my explosives too... and Luna said she wondered if I hadn't 'misdirected' the Guards because I was trying to throw them off! I'm probably going to be indicted, Volk. Can you believe it? Celestia at our gates, and they want to indict me as some kind of mastermind vigilante executioner! Because of a bunch of coincidences, or possibly even a frame-up job!"

Volk turned and moved to the window with Fisher. "I know you won't like me asking this, sir, but... did you do it?"

"Of course not!" The horror on Fisher's face was genuine. "I had no idea anything like that was going on! How could I? We had a more important problem!" He glared down at the castle. "I focused on the Cult and on the mafia ponies whom I had very good reason to believe attacked the Elements. I made the right decison. I'd do it again." He chuckled ruefully. "Not that I'll get the chance. I'll retain my seat, I'm sure, and the charges will never stick--being innocent does still count for something--but I'll have no power to direct the nation's defenses. I'll just be watching as Night Light, Puissance, and Wallflower run them into the ground..."

"It's too bad you don't have the Elements, sir. Luna would have to let you fight the war then."

"Well, I've had my best research scientists study if there's some way to transfer them, but so far, nothing." The Archduke shook his head. "It's all for nothing. I gave my soul to this nation, and this is the thanks I get. Ponies don't understand that these days..."

He trailed off again, and Volk turned to go. On his way out, Fisher raised his voice slightly. "By the way, Volk, how did your hunting go? Find any Cultists?"

"Four or five, sir. They're all in custody. Your own?"

"I managed fine without you for the day. We did at least take down the Canterlot remnants of the Cult. Two of my mares were injured badly enough to need a doctor; I got off with a few dents in the armor and some burned fur. It's funny how many ponies underestimate my skills as a fighter. As if all I did was push papers." Fisher shook his head again, then looked over at Volk. "You're limping, though. Did somepony hit you?"

"Yeah, you could say that. But don't worry about me. I'd do this even if it killed me. That kind of fight... it's the kind of job I love." Volk grinned. "If you don't mind me asking, sir--what do you love?"

"Protecting this nation at all costs," growled Fisher. He was in no mood for rhetorical questions. "Keeping its ponies safe. Making the sacrifices to support Equestria as a whole. Others might turn from it--but I won't. That's what it means to be a noble." He shook his head. "Anyways,get some rest. If I only have a few days left as Minister of War, I intend to make the most of it. Tomorrow, I'm having you meet with Captain Armor to schedule a time to train his officers in combat. Make sure they at least have half a clue."

"Yes, sir."

On his way out the door, Volk stopped suddenly and turned. Fisher wasn't sure why he thought he saw a faint smile on Volk's face; when he looked again, it was gone. "What is it?"

"I just wanted to say... I know right now it looks bad, sir. I know it looks like you've been forced out of your position, that Equestria has lost its Minister of War right when it needs it most. I know it looks like a big blow for the nation that couldn't have gone better for Equestria's enemies if she had orchestrated it herself. But I promise you, I will stay by your side and do everything I can to see things turn around." Volk's eyes gleamed. "Honest."

"Thank you, Volk. That means a lot to me." Fisher settled down on the ground. "You may leave me for the night."

Volk turned and left the Estate, smiling to himself. He touched his back right leg, winced a bit, then resumed smiling. Damn, Max, we gotta do that again someday. I had more fun than I've had in a real long time. He chuckled. Course, if there's a next time I'll be bringing a lot more friends. And I won't get caught on a collapsing column again. I wonder if they still think I'm stuck in that rubble?

Volk hurried down the path. His real superiors would want to hear about what had transpired. Things had gone much better than after their last operation, that Opelick mess, and they would just love to hear all about it.

***

"Fisher!"

Archduke Fisher looked up from his simple meal of raw vegetables and grass. "Greengrass," he growled. "This is my private estate. You have no right to be here."

"Very true," agreed Greengrass. The brown-coated earth pony beamed as he walked up to Fisher's table. "But, thanks to your windows being surprisingly breakable, here I am."

Fisher said nothing for a moment, concentrating on swallowing another bite of spinach. "Here to gloat?"

"Gloat? Me? Just because you decided to let my secretary die rather than imperil a meaningless spy operation on the Opelick nobles, and I vowed that I'd see you ruined one day, and now you've lost almost everything?" Greengrass laughed. "Do I really seem that petty?"

"You are nothing if not petty." Fisher bit into a carrot. "What do you want, Greengrass?"

Greengrass said nothing for a moment, only turning and leaving the dining room to go to the living room, which overlooked the city. "You know what I want," he said at last.

"Your influence back, I'm sure." Fisher stood from his table and trotted over to Greengrass. If I threw him out the window, I might actually earn some points with Luna... he thought. "Bribes are getting hard to come by, I suppose."

"Oh, it was never about the money." Greengrass grinned. "The power to manipulate ponies like chess pieces? Certainly. But money? Not as much--"

"I really don't care to hear your motives," snapped Fisher. "Throwing you from the Court was the one good move Luna's made in the past few years."

"And here I thought we were such good friends," said Greengrass. "Remember when we worked together to deny Ponyville relief aid? Good times--"

"I did that to gain control of the Elements so I could train them! Protect them!" Fisher raised a hoof and had to seriously struggle with the urge to slap Greengrass. "I didn't have a thought of personal profit in my mind! I'm not like you or Blueblood, who just wanted to pass your own political bills and accrue power! I did what I did for the nation!"

He took a few deep breaths, but when he looked at Greengrass, the earth pony seemed nonplussed. He's strangely calm, Fisher thought. He looked so ragged when I saw him last...

"Either way," said Greengrass at last, "We do share an understanding. Which is why I've come to you." He was silent for a moment, looking out over the city. "I want my power back, Bobbing. I thought I could get it back by doing something heroic, but Luna just about told me tonight she won't restore it even if I personally defeat Corona, Tirek, and the Smooze all at once. If I'm to get it back, I need to go around her."

"I have no power to help you with that, and I wouldn't--"

"I know full well that one of the subprovincial nobles in Caneighda, Viscount Fudge Ripple of Manetreal, is under your hoof. He'll do whatever you say. Including resign." Greengrass smiled. "There's an old, obscure rule that applies in Caneighda and its surrounding provinces. If a subprovincial noble resigns without an heir, Caneighda gets their vote--and committee and ministry seats. Thanks to your machinations, Fudge Ripple's on some prestigious ministries. Unless Luna wants to violate her own rules, she'll have to let me take his place." His eyes gleamed. "And my influence will be back."

"And why would I destroy a useful ally for your sake?"

"Because I can destroy Baron Max."

Fisher turned his head to Greengrass and said nothing.

"Max is happier with his saving-ponies thing than he is doing paperwork. I have influence with him, and Luna has officially offered to replace his title of Baron with that of Knight Errant if he wants it. I can persuade him to want it. Failing that... he's as open as a book. I could wreck his career in a dozen ways." Greengrass chuckled. "He told me how you fretted about Nulpar having an insecure border."

"Max refuses to muster any soldiers. He insists that his other priorities--transportation and other such nonsense--is more important than having a fully-monitored national border. He lets griffins wander his province without care that they might be spies." Fisher scowled. "He knows nothing."

Greengrass shrugged. "I won't insult you by offering you anything for your own gain. I'm aware of how selfless you are. If you help me, I'll get the committee appointments I need--and I'll help you get Max out. I'm sure you already have another pony installed somewhere in Nulpar who can become the next Baron and will adopt a more secure border policy." He raised a hoof. "Deal?"

Fisher paused. His horn glowed as he checked his house's magical sensors. They would alert him to any kind of magic spell--such as, say, a recording spell--active in the area, and would also go off if they sensed pegasi flight magic outside or earth ponies anywhere on the plateau with his house. But the sensors showed nothing. Unless somepony had climbed up the sheer cliff face for several hundred meters and was currently dangling below him, there was nopony else around to hear.

"Deal," he growled. If I instigate a disturbance in Nulpar, once Max is out, I--the closest noble--will have to deal with it. I can buy some time, maybe even show that I know what I'm doing about security. "Bury Max."

"It," said Greengrass. "Will be my pleasure."

***

Greengrass had just finished descending the path and had reached Canterlot when Max hopped off the mountain from right above him.

Greengrass reared back and put his hooves to his mouth. "Dear me!" he said. "Could it be that you were listening in on that?"

Max stared at him. "You knew that I was following you," he said. "You knew it ever since we left the city."

"Who, me?" Greengrass shook his head. "Alas, now my wicked corruption is exposed. I suppose now you'll run along to the Princess and report to her how I'm still the debased stallion she knew me to be--"

"What are you doing?" asked Max. "I mean, you just got Fisher to agree to fraud. If that was your plan, you should have cleared it with the Guards. Or me. Luna just assigned me a few ponies specifically for things like this--"

"Where's the fun in that?" asked Greengrass. "Now, remember, you need to act indignent to sell this. Raise your hoof. Stomp around a little. Make sure to mention how you never thought that I, your friend, would pull such a dastardly--"

"Greengrass."

The Duke stopped talking and looked at Max.

"Tell me what's going on," said Max.

"I--"

"Tell me as your friend."

Greengrass was silent for a few moments. Then he said, "You know, before I lost my influence, I was having a wonderful chat with Fancy Pants. Smart pony, by the way, always seems to know what's going on in the Court. He had some small suspicion of what I'd planned to do and he asked me why I was doing it. It was almost like he thought I was some utter bastard who would never sacrifice his own desires to help a friend."

"Imagine that," said Max.

"So I explained to him that I never really saw myself as a Courtier. I, as it happens, am a gardener. And a gardener doesn't sacrifice his most precious flowers just because the ground gets a little rocky. A real gardener does what he has to do in order to make sure his flowers flourish.

"Well, Fancy Pants, he didn't like that at all. He told me that gardeners had to admit when it just couldn't be done. Sometimes, environments just aren't fertile, he said; a proper gardener knows when to give up and move on. What would a gardener do, he asked, if he had no water with which to nourish his fields?" Greengrass nodded. "It wasn't a hard question. I told him he would use his blood."

The two were silent for almost a full minute. A soft breeze blew past them, and Max realized that Greengrass seemed to have almost a tender expression. "Greengrass?" he asked. "Why did Notary leave you?"

The gardener smiled, as if this was the truly important question. "Remember," he said. "We didn't know you and my father were coming. We were trapped in the Sun Cultist hideout, thugs everywhere, and all of them ready to kill us. Now, Notary, she's quite good at sneaking, she could get out without trouble--but you know me. I'm quite incapable of it. Had I gone with her, I'd likely have gotten us both killed. So I sent her on without me."

"And she just went?"

"Not at first. As it happens, she refused for quite some time..."

***

The pony locked inside what had once been a junior manager's office looked, at first glance, like a large blanket or a big pile of white-ish rags. She seemed to blend into the background of the room, as much a piece of furniture as the tables and desks that had been shoved to one side. On closer inspection, though, one could see an off-white mane that hung limply over a face and neck, a tail swishing slightly back and forth, and a slight body that seemed too tired to be able to get up and move anymore. This was Notary, and this was the pony Greengrass had ruined his career to save.

The Duke smiled slightly as he looked in through the window, then rapped a hoof on the window. Notary glanced up with a tired expression, stared for a moment, and sprang to her feet. "Sir!" she gasped.

Greengrass gave her a cheerful wave. "I hope you didn't think I forgot about you."

"Not for a moment!" Notary ran to the door, her mane uncharacteristically askew. "Sir, how did you get here? Are Guards coming? Are--"

"In a moment, Notary," said Greengrass. "I just need a moment to open the door."

"Of course, sir," said Notary, with a shocking amount of professionalism considering the circumstances.

Greengrass smiled and reached into his mane. He had tucked a few tools within it even before he had entered the Court for the final time; he had known, should his motion pass, that the Baronetess of Opelick would immediately seize him and drag him to their hideout, and had also known she would be too panicked to properly search him. He quickly found the screwdriver he was looking for and went to work on the hinges; the door was taken out of the jam within three minutes, and then Notary was leaping at him in a gigantic hug. "Sir!"

The Duke smiled and gave his servant a long hug. "It's good to see you again, Notary."

"I am sorry I got captured. It was--"

"Entirely my fault. I underestimated the Cult, and you paid for it... but I'm here to stop payment." Greengrass held her for a moment longer. "Did they hurt you?"

"No. They wanted me to join them willingly. But... the Baronetess threatened to kill me if I did not cooperate soon."

"She'll pay," said Greengrass, in a simple tone that brooked no possibility of argument. "But enough about that. You're not injured, are you? Did they feed you? Did--"

Notary laughed. "I'm fine now, sir. Thank you."

The two slowly broke their embrace. Notary, after a moment more of silence, said, "They patrol this hallway every half-hour or so. We have about thirteen minutes before somepony will spot us. We seem to be located in an abandoned office building on the third level of the city--"

"Probably in the poorer section of that level, near one of the older schools." Greengrass had noted the run-down nature of the building, and heard the distant sounds of foals frolicking during their morning recess break. "If I remember the general architectural style of commercial buildings in this part of town correctly, there should be a back stairwell at the end of this hallway, which leads to a large window near the trash disposal area."

Notary nodded. "What is our next move?"

"You're to get out of here as fast as you can." Greengrass smiled. "You're one of the stealthiest mares I know. Given the general caliber of the Cultists, even if they're watching that window you should be able to slip past them."

"Of course," said Notary, nodding her head. "That will not be difficult. And yourself?"

"I have a score to settle with the Baronetess."

Notary paused. "But... sir, even if you defeat her, surely the Cult will attack you in force."

Greengrass shrugged. "Probably."

"Sir, we can both use the back stairs--"

"I'm not as stealthy as you. I would be caught, and you with me. That is not going to happen." Greengrass smiled easily; he had ceased worrying about his imminent doom. He had gotten what he wanted; the rest was meaningless. "I think we both know that there isn't a way out of here for me."

Notary opened her mouth, then closed it. Greengrass knew she was considering any kind of possible way for him to escape, and was realizing that it would not be possible. When she finally spoke, she said, "Then I will stay with you, and we will fight them together."

"No, Notary." Greengrass sighed. "I'm sorry, but it's time for you to find another master."

"I do not want another master!" Notary shook her head. "Sir, we've been together for years. I cannot leave you now."

"Notary--"

"I don't care if the Sun Cult wants to kill you, or if Luna still hates you. None of that matters." Notary pressed a hoof against Greengrass's. "We are friends. Just as you would not leave me, I will not leave you for anything. I would rather go down fighting with you than live knowing I had run away in your hour of need"

Greengrass was silent for a moment. "Notary, suppose there were a gardener who cultivated a vast field--and, among that field, the gardener had one flower he loved above all others. It was his most beautiful flower and he considered it to be his greatest achievement. But then came a day when he had to move to an estate in the desert. He knew that, if he took his flower, it would shrivel in the hot sun; it would find little nourishment in the soil; it would, at best, wither and limp along in a stunted half-life, its every moment a pale mockery of what it could have been in a less hostile environment. Now, do you think any gardener worthy of the title would take his flower there? Or would he leave it behind in his greenhouse, even if he never had to see it again?" He shook his head. "I lost my power on the Court, Notary. I have no influence and nothing to offer you. And I made Luna break her own rules to do it, so she hates me more than ever and will never permit me to amount to anything. Nothing you do will matter if you stay with me, and I will not see my most precious flower languish due to her attachment to my person."

Notary shut her eyes. "Sir... I don't care if it makes sense or not. I will not betray you."

"Who said anything about betraying? Notary, when you leave me, I want you to fulfill my final request to you." Greengrass put a hoof on her shoulder. "I've taught you everything I know. Use what I've given you to make your own garden. Go to someplace where nopony has been able to create anything, where even Luna and the imbeciles in her Court are helpless, and grow something beautiful."

"But I... sir, I can't. You know I can't. Nopony even notices me--"

"No, they don't I know it will be hard. But you are a brilliant, industrious, talented mare, Notary, and I am absolutely certain that if you try, you can bring flowers into bloom in the most arid of soils." Greengrass said nothing for a moment. "Go, Notary. Flourish. Stun the nation with the kind of beauty you can create, in places where no other pony could match you. Show the world how incredible a pony you are. And then I will know that, even if everything else about me is ruined, something of me lives on." He gave her one more hug. "This is what I truly want from you, Notary. I don't want you to die just as you're coming into bloom. What I want is to be able to look down from... wherever we ponies go when we die... and to see that you've created something so gorgeous that even the dead cannot help but see it. Can you do this, Notary? Can you fulfill my final request?"

The secretary was quiet for a moment, and a few tears fell to the ground. "Maybe I can, but... but what about you?"

"Me? Notary, I've made peace with what's going to happen." He smiled. "You see..."

You may be master of your chosen occupation.
With several strings of polo ponies in your stable.
You must remember, all the same
That at the crux of every game
Is knowing when it's time to leave... the table.

And it's important, to be artful, in your exit.
No turning back, you must accept, the con is done...
But now and then, you might recall
Those moments when you had it all.
You had the charm, you had the talent--and by the Stars, you had some fun!

It was a ball, it was a blast!
And it's a shame it couldn't last.
But every chapter has to end, you must agree.
It was a joy, it was sublime,
A splendid way to spend some time
For a dirty, rotten colt like me.

Greengrass laughed softly and looked around. "You know, my father asked me yesterday if I regretted anything I'd done. And, besides the investigation that landed you here... I'd have to say no." He shrugged. "I mean, I didn't quite manage to rule the nation, but what would I have done if I hadn't tried? Grown old, fat, and complacent, collect dusty old paintings like Puissance or host frivolous balls like Fancy Pants, sit in my ducal seat and bicker over meaningless nonsense, all the while wondering what I could have done if I'd tried? I'd have hated that life. I'm glad I chose this one."

"I'm glad I was able to share it."

The Duke smiled and continued. "You're not upset either, are you?"

"No sir. I wouldn't trade my time with you for anything."

Greengrass continued:

When you look back on all your conquests and deceptions.
You see a thousand flawless pearls set in a strand...
Laid out from Bierbits to Roam,
Each one as perfect, as a poem.
An opus to be proud of,
Though it's written in the sand!

It was a ball, it was a thrill,
You had the grace, you had the skill
To know exactly what to say and what to do...
You wouldn't trade a single day
Or have it any other way.
For a sneaky, little mare like you.

Notary smiled through her tears and began to sing:

It's almost a religion, the need to take a pigeon
And to play your part with elegance and zest.
And when it's time to cut the act, and your duffel bag is packed,
Take comfort in the fact, that you at last surpassed the best!

It was a blast, it was a ball,
It was a gas, I loved it all
And if we beat Luna at last
Then that's a plus...

Oh, Notary... you have the verve
You have the guts!
You've got the nerve!
You've got the nuts!
And though we're dirty rotten crooks--
Dirty rotten shnooks
Dirty rotten crooks!
Dirty rotten--oh!

They embraced for one last time, then sang together:

It was a trip, it was a blast,
And it's a shame it couldn't last.
Cause it was almost too prodigious to discuss...

And even though we lost the Game
I'm glad we played it just the same!

Dirty! Rotten! Folks! They paused, then finished with, Like us!

The two were silent for a moment more, and then Greengrass said. "Go, Notary. Plant your garden. Grow it. Tend to it. Weed it. Pollinate--"

"Sir, in the name of anything you find sacred, please don't go further what that metaphor."

Greengrass laughed at that. "Make something so beautiful that only you could have made it. And don't worry too much about me. Can you do that?"

"Yes, sir." Notary bowed, lingered for one moment... then turned and ran down the corridor, vanishing into the shadows before she was halfway through the hall.

Greengrass watched her go, not bothering to stop the tears falling from his eyes. Only when he distantly heard a door shut at the end of the hallway did he turn. "Alright," he said. "That Baronetess cost me far more than I ever wanted to pay. Now it's time for a little payback..."

***

"You really let her go?" asked Max. "I thought you two were inseparable."

Greengrass shrugged. "I knew I was... well, I was certain that the cultists would kill me, and I knew that it would be better for me to become fertilizer for my flowers than to crush them when I fell."

"Can we maybe stop talking in gardening metaphors?"

"No. I told this to Notary. She understood... and she left to plant her roots elsewhere. That's really all there is to it."

"But you lived," said Max, in a low tone. "Because your father and I saved you. Have you reached out to--"

"What for? I was honest with her--she's learned all she can from me. All I'd do now is weigh her down. And besides, 'lived' is perhaps overstating it. I'm still walking around, but I can't grow in Equestria or even Caneighda now--Luna won't let me. Really, from a plant-based perspective, I'm more of a rotting tree that hasn't quite fallen over yet than anything else. But you, Max, you are another rare flower, the kind the Court hasn't seen in centuries. If my destruction fertilizes--"

"Okay, first of all, I am not a flower. Nor am I a weed, a bush, or a ficus tree." Max put a hoof on Greengrass's shoulder. "Second, I am not building my career on your corpse."

"Then what are you going to do?"

Max took a long breath. "We're going back to Luna," he said at last. "We're telling her what Fisher agreed to, because that's corruption and she should know. And, in the interests of complete honesty I'm telling her why. I'm not going to lie and say that I also caught you out in a genuine attempt to ruin me, and hope that her hatred for you elevates me. I'll make very clear that you ran your own sting on Fisher specifically so I would overhear it. Are we clear?"

"Really?" The gardener laughed. "How far are you willing to go with that 'complete honesty' thing? I've been told that I can be quite a bastard, Max. Suppose I committed a genuine crime, one you felt compelled to report? How would you stop yourself from benefitting then?"

For a moment, Max had no answer--but only for a moment. "With complete honesty," he said. "If you commit a real crime, I'll turn you in. And I'll explain why. I'll tell all the world that you robbed orphans or widows or Filly Scouts in order to help me. Luna won't fire me; she knows I wouldn't really be to blame. But the public response, my prestige? I'd suffer for it. And you know it." He smiled. "If you want to raise me by doing something evil, I'll make sure I don't benefit at all from it. Any other bright ideas?"

"But..." Greengrass seemed lost for words. "You can't take yourself hostage! That's not fair!"

Max laughed. "There's only one way you can help me. Make yourself a better pony. Earn back trust and reputation. Use that if you want to support my career. If you try to cheat, I'll expose you myself. And if I get a little embarrassed, so be it."

The Duke shook his head. "You know," he said, "You've got the makings of a very manipulative pony."

"And you've got a better heart than you'd ever admit." Max clapped Greengrass on the back. "So, how about? Let's go talk to Luna."

Greengrass didn't move when Max started to walk. "Max, I..." he trailed off. "Why should you care about saving my career? There's nothing left of it, anyway. I sit in the Court and can't get so much as a traffic bill passed. I have no power or influence, and the only pony I really cared about... I lost her too." He sighed. "What's the point of me staying in the Game?"

"May I answer that, sir?"

Greengrass and Max jumped almost a foot off the ground as they turned to see the little white mare walking out from behind a tree. Greengrass spoke first. "Notary? But--but--"

Notary smiled softly as Greengrass stared. "It's good to see you again too, sir."

And then the two were hugging. It took almost a minute before Greengrass could manage, "I thought you were fixing up Bitsberg."

"And I did. I applied for long-forgotten grants for which there was no competition, restructured the city's civic government to be much more efficient, persuaded the citizens to vote in new officials who would actually lead the town instead of sitting in a stupor, and helped shore up their tax breaks with an advertising campaign persuading a few businesses to move to the city. They're doing as well as any other small industrial town now."

Greengrass blinked. "All that in six months?"

Notary just smiled.

"But... why did you come back?"

"I received a letter from you."

"Probably forged by Sneak Attack," said Max.

"Yes, it lacked the code we use. As such, I concluded the message might have been fraudulent, so I took a different train. As it happened, somepony shut down the train station before my train arrived. I only just got in." Notary looked at Greengrass. "Sir, what is going on?"

"Oh, long story--tell you all about it later. But how long are you staying? The next train to Bitsberg--"

"I am staying permanently."

Greengrass was silent for a few moments. "But, Bitsberg--"

"Can get along without me, now that I have shown them what to do. They barely noticed me when I was there, except when my shill explained the things I needed to teach them. He can handle things on his own from now on."

"But you wanted to matter, and--"

"Yes... and I did matter here. But I think I can also matter here." Notary blushed. "I did... I missed you, sir. And I think you missed me."

Greengrass looked away, but Max noted how his eyes seemed to be tearing up. "You have no idea how much I want you to resume your place by my side. But... Notary, I have no power, no influence. I can do nothing for you. You deserve better than to languish by my side."

"That is hardly the attitude I expect to see from a pony who once aspired to rule the nation," said Notary in a mildly reprimanding voice. "Furthermore, you do have something to offer me--your friendship. And I can offer you mine, if you want it."

"Of course I want it."

"Besides. I hardly think it impossible for you to regain what you have lost, even if we must do it in a more... honest fashion."

"Must we?" joked Greengrass.

"Yes, or my wife will kill me." Ignoring Greengrass's shocked look, she added, "Baron Max had no power eighteen months ago, and now he is one of the most prominent ascending nobles in the Court. You are a Duke. Even with no other nobles on your side, you can do things that will force the nation to respect and support you. Especially if we do it together." She paused. "I know your downfall was caused by my capture--"

"No. It was caused by my own mistakes, and I will not hear you criticizing yourself about it." Greengrass was silent for a long moment. "Will you really work with me once again?"

"Of course."

"Then... welcome back." And they hugged.

Max grinned. "Alright, you two. Now. Let's go tell Luna about Fisher's latest crime--leaving nothing out. Okay?"

Greengrass mock-pouted, but he was clearly happy--and in his head, he was marveling at the thought of having just been defeated by Baron Max, of all ponies. "As you wish, Baron."

"After you, Greengrass."

***

"The evening express to Ponyville is now pulling into the station. It will depart in approximately twelve minutes..."

Raindrops yawned as she looked at the approaching train. A full day had passed since they had talked to Princess Luna, and it had been very enjoyable indeed. After a lovely breakfast in the one of the castle restaurants, the Elements had taken Snails back to the Insectarium, where he dragged them through all the exhibits and revealed his encyclopedic knowledge about all things squirmy. He even listed a few things that Cheerilee claimed not to know, which had absolutely thrilled him. Then they had a very enjoyable lunch at the Pizza Palace, the greatest pizzeria in all Canterlot, where Cheerilee properly introduced Duty Enpay to them and she told them about some of her adventures, including her quest to save the trapped ponies of the Crystal Empire. Next they all took a nice long walk through the Canterlot gardens, where Snails chased more bugs and everypony else just relaxed. After the utter nightmare the previous day had been, it was nice for things to be pleasant again.

"We've got to see each other more often," Cheerilee was saying to Duty Enpay. "It was so much fun catching up with you!"

"Likewise," said Duty. "Maybe next time we can do it without the nutjob vigilantes."

Cheerilee laughed, and the two nuzzled. "It was good seeing you again, DN."

"You too, Cher'."

Carrot Top chuckled at the two and turned to Raindrops. "Wasn't the Insectarium fun? I can't wait to tell the Union of Farmers what kinds of new bugs we can use! Maybe we'll all chip in and get one of those spellbugs that walk over your field and plow it for you!"

"It sounds kind of golem-esque to me. What if they go out of control and start to plow over everything?"

Carrot Top blinked. "...hmm. Maybe we'll stick to that new fencing that's supposed to magically repel bad bugs."

"Probably wise." Raindrops chuckled. "But don't tell Snails. He doesn't believe in bad bugs."

"Raindrops! Raindrops!" Snails scampered over from the newstand, a newspaper clutched tightly in his nascent telekinesis. "Look at the papers! They wrote about you!"

Raindrops turned and grinned. "What'd they write?"

"That you and the other Knights and Baron Max were really super awesome and you saved everypony!" Snails' voice was almost a cheer. "That you went into the Airship place and you beat up all the bad guys and saved a lot of lives and you were super duper amazing and, and..." Snails took a breath, then said, "And that you're the best pony in the world!"

"Really? It said that?"

Snails blushed. "More or less. And if it didn't actually say it, then it should've!"

The weathermare laughed and scooped up Snails. "Anything else in the news, Snails? Any other ponies we know?"

"You might want to check page two."

Raindrops turned to see Baron Max and the Duke Greengrass approaching, smiles on both their faces. The weathermare looked at Greengrass, who was the pony who had spoken. "Dare I ask why?"

"Well, there's just a fascinating story. It seems the good Archduke Fisher has run into a spot of trouble." Greengrass shook his head. "He's not long for the Court, I'm afraid."

"In addition to screwing up so badly yesterday that he would have gotten those prisoners killed if it wasn't for us," said Max, "And the allegations that he was behind the vigilantes since Goliath worked for him, since they used his bombs, etcetera... it seems he made a deal to salvage his political position by destroying me, as well as Viscount Fudge Ripple of Manetrael. That was the final star with Princess Luna. He might be innocent of helping the vigilantes, and the Guards thing might have just been incompetence, but that kind of naked corruption... she said he's done."

"The indictments were handed down this morning," said Greengrass. "He's been asked to set his affairs in order and turn himself in within forty-eight hours. His wife Svelte will likely take up his seat in the Court."

"Good," said Cheerilee. She and Duty Enpay approached the others. "He won't be missed."

The train to Ponyville blasted its horn. "Five minutes!" called the conductor.

Raindrops nodded. "We've got to get going. Baron, thanks for all your help. You're a good friend."

Baron Max bowed. "The pleasure is mine. Thank you for your assistance in protecting the lives of the citizens of Canterlot."

"You should come visit Ponyville sometime," said Carrot Top. "I'm sure everypony would love you."

"Maybe some other time. For tonight..." Max smiled, looking slightly dopey. "Duchess Posey and I have an evening planned."

Greengrass shook his head. "I'm given to understand she doesn't like it when you get beaten half to death on some wild heroic stunt."

"She's not too fond of the beaten part," said Max, rubbing a hoof over some of the bruises he'd gotten in all the fighting, "But the heroic stuff? She loves when I tell her stories about things like that, and then she--"

Greengrass held up a hoof. "Actually, this is the part where I stop asking questions."

Max chuckled. "Turns out the mares likes ponies who do the right thing. You should try it more often."

Raindrops turned to Greengrass. "On that note--I appreciate that you protected Snails. So, thanks again. But I still don't like you, and that isn't going to change."

"Likewise, I suppose."

Raindrops turned to go, then changed her mind and instead walked up to Greengrass. "And so--if you think helping me here means we'll go easy on you if you do something else to us, think again. We've got the Right of Approach. If you hurt us, we will use it and we'll bury you. Okay?" There wasn't as much anger in her tone now--she had mostly gotten rid of her pent up frustrations from the previous day, and she no longer desired to beat Greengrass senseless. But she did want to make sure Greengrass knew he didn't have carte blanche to go after the Elements again.

Greengrass widened his eyes in a good imitation of astonishment. "Why, are you threatening me?"

"Yes. Yes I am."

The Duke shook his head slightly. "Please don't underestimate me, Raindrops. I may have lost Luna's favor and my own political influence, but I assure you, I could make you very unhappy if I so chose, and Luna wouldn't be able to do a thing about it."

Raindrops' eyes narrowed. "Oh yeah? You just try it--"

Greengrass stepped to the side and said, loudly, as if a natural continuation from their conversation, "Why, that's a wonderful idea, Raindrops! I would love to have Snails stop by on the occasional weekend and help me with replanting my garden. His knowledge of bugs would indeed be useful, and I'm sure he'd love to see all the exotic and magical specimins that a garden like mine utilizes!"

"WOW!" Snails spun around and jumped in front of Raindrops. "Oh, can I, sis? Can I come and play with the bugs and help Mr. Greengrass sometime soon? Please?"

"Wha--but--I never--" Raindrops stuttered. Then she made the mistake of looking into Snails' big pleading eyes. "I mean, uh... that is... ARGH!" She threw up her wings. "I give up! I'm going home!"

Cheerilee and Carrot Top chuckled, and Snails--who seemed to think this meant 'yes'--squealed with joy and hopped onto Raindrops' back. "I can't wait! I'll bring you back all kinds of pretty flowers, Raindrops!"

Greengrass burst into laughter, and even Max seemed amused.

The Elements boarded the train, Cheerilee waving goodbye to Duty and Carrot Top saying a few quick words to the stallions. Snails hurried ahead to sit in the best of the car. "Raindrops?" he called.

"Yeah?"

"I love you." Snails waved so she would sit to him. "And I'm gonna keep being the best little brother I can be."

"And I'll be the best big sister I can be." Raindrops hugged him close. She didn't feel angry at the moment; she had beaten all the villains and protected her brother. That was what mattered. She had kept him safe and helped secured a safe, healthy world for him to grow up in.

She hugged him again as the train began to move. "I promise."

***

Three days later, Diamond Tiara was still in a bad mood.

First her dad dragged her to the stupid bug museum. Then some stupid criminals ran around town and did stupid things, and all the ponies had to stay indoors, so she and Silver Spoon were trapped in the nearest building--a supplier of stupid sewer pipes. And their fathers had been so intrigued by a business proposition the proprietor had come up with that they had spent the entire next day, after the lockdown was lifted and ponies could do fun things, in the sewer contractor's office. Talking. About. Pipes.

It was the most boring day Diamond Tiara had ever spent in Canterlot, and to top it all off, when they finally came home, Cheerilee was demanding a parent-teacher conference. She completely exaggerated about what happened to Snails, and now both she and Silver Spoon were grounded for two weeks! The trip to Trottingham to sample the elegant cuisine of their farms? Canceled! Their tickets to go on an airship ride from Canterlot to Fillydelphia and back, traveling in the most luxurious accomodations available? Gone! And all because they'd slightly bothered Snails.

It wasn't fair.

She sighed as she dragged herself through her front gate, locked it behind her, and sat down in her yard. Except for school, her father had strictly forbidden her from leaving the family property for the duration of her grounding. "This sucks," she said. "Snails sucks."

"Psst! DT!"

Diamond Tiara's ears twisted. She thought she heard Silver Spoon's voice, but that was impossible--that filly was grounded for as long as she was. "Huh?"

"DT! Let me in!"

Diamond Tiara leaned over the fence and saw Silver Spoon hiding in a bush right outside. "I've got something really important to tell you!" whispered the foal, who looked panicked. "Something horrible happened!"

Diamond Tiara didn't want to get in any more trouble, but she didn't want to leave her friend in the lurch either. She quickly opened the gate and let Silver Spoon in. "What?"

"Check your mail! Now!" Silver Spoon grabbed Diamond Tiara. "Before your dad does!"

Confused, Diamond Tiara trotted over to the mailbox and took out the letters. "What? It's a bunch of flyers and catalogues, and an invitation from Button Mash to do something called 'LARP.'" She wrinkled her nose. "Whatever that is."

Silver Spoon quickly picked out one of the catalogue. "Look at this!"

"The Foal Free Flyer?" Diamond Tiara examined the cover, which showed a bunch of foals without any dresses, toys, or other things that might be saleable. "What's wrong?"

"Just read page 5!"

Diamond Tiara opened to that page and smiled. "Hey, it's pictures of us!" She pointed at two large images. "They even got my good side!"

"No! Read the text below it!"

Diamond Tiara did so. "It has come to our attention that some of our foal models, particular the 'Diamond Tiara' and Silver Spoon' series, possess several manufacturer defects." She frowned. "Defects? We're perfect!"

"Just keep reading!"

The filly did so. "Ponies from these models may exhibit the following traits: bullying, brattiness, nosiness, noisiness, obnoxiousness, and general misbehavior. In the interest of satisfying all of our customers, we would like to assure you that if your Diamond Tiara or Silver Spoon displays any of these behaviors, you may... trade them in immediately for a new model?!" She gaped, then turned to Silver Spoon. "I thought you were making that up to get rid of Snails!"

"So did I! I didn't think foals really came from a store! My parents told me that Princess Luna personally created me and gave me to them as a gift!" Silver Spoon shook her head dumbly. "But it's in a catalogue, so it has to be true! The Consumer Protection Laws wouldn't let them write it otherwise!"

"Maybe the catalogue's fake?" murmured Diamond Tiara, hoping against hope. "Some stupid prank--"

Silver Spoon shook her head. "It's got ordering numbers! Customer service mailing addresses! A survey in the back! It's got everything a real catalogue has! It can't be fake!"

"We could ask our parents--"

"But then they'll think we have the nosiness flaw!" Silver Spoon looked panicked. "We can't do that!"

Diamond Tiara turned a page and read, "Trade-in now and we'll make you a great offer on a top-of-the-line model! If you want compassion, energy, and love, try our Dinky model! If you want speed and power, why not look into a Scootaloo--with scooter included!" She made a mental note of the catalogue number for the latter foal, then continued. "A Pipsqueak can't be beat in terms of good cheer and better behavior! And if only the very best will do, try our princess series?!" A big picture of Alula took up a quarter of the next page. "Trade-in today! Remember, our customers are the best parents--and they deserve the very best foals!"

"What are we going to do?" asked Silver Spoon. "What if our parents trade us in for better foals?"

"They wouldn't. They love us..." Diamond Tiara's voice trailed off. Her father had seemed so angry with her when he'd found out what she'd done to Snails that he'd barely been able to speak. What if he did trade her in for a Dinky? All the adults liked Dinky. She couldn't compete with that! "I mean, we have to stop them. We won't let them trade us in!"

"But what can we do?"

"First, let's burn the catalogues--"

"I already burned the one at my house, but what if our parents get more in the mail?"

"We have to..." Diamond Tiara gulped. She didn't like what she was about to say, but she had no choice. "We have to be nice. We have to not be bratty or bullies or whatever else this stupid thing says we might be. If we're not defective, the company won't take us back!"

Silver Spoon paused. "Isn't it too late--"

"No! We'll be the nicest foals in all Ponyville! Even to dorks like Snips and Snails! We'll be so good that nopony would want to get rid of us!" She bumped hooves with Silver Spoon. "We can do it! We're the smartest foals in town!"

She looked out over the fence and saw some of the foals wandering around, playing and goofing in the nice spring day. I can do this, she thought. I just have to be nice to all of them. But I'll do it! I won't get returned for a better model!

And so, as Truffle Shuffle walked past the house, she made herself raise a hoof and wave. "Hi! Nice day, isn't it?"

***

"SNAILS! SNAILS! SNAILS!"

Snails grinned as Pinkie Pie set the gigantic ice cream sundae in front of him. It was as tall as he was and was dripping with hot fudge, whipped cream, and crumbled cookies. "I'm so excited!" the pony squeaked. "This is the first Super Duper Ice Cream Amulet Test in Ponyville history!" She bounced around Snails. "Best! Day! EVER!"

"SNAILS!" chanted the foals who had gathered to watch.

"Nopony's ever eaten the Supersized Sugary-Sweet Sundae before!!" said Sweetie Belle. "Everypony that gets close gets brain freeze!"

"I heard even Big Mac couldn't do it!" said Scootaloo. "Or Bonbon or Pinkie Pie, and they love sweet things!"

"Well, I can! Ice cream headaches don't bother me!" Snails held up the amulet that had come in the mail earlier that day, then put it around his neck. "I've got this!" And without further ado, he plunged his head into the sundae and began to gobble.

The foals and Pinkie kept cheering as Snails worked his way through the sundae, forgoing a spoon and instead chewing right through it. By minute seven he had outlasted every other pony who had fallen to the dreaded ice cream headache. By minute nine he had eaten so much that he had to crane his head into the bowl to continue, making it look like it was swallowing him. And the tenth minute had not yet ended when he licked up the last bits of ice cream and cheered. "I DID IT!"

"YAAAY!" yelled the foals.

"That was amazing!" said Firelock, a few flares shooting out of her horn in celebration. "That was so cool! Your amulet rocks!"

"I know! Princess Luna gave it to me!" said Snails. "She wanted to thank me after I helped catch a real bad criminal in Canterlot last week!"

The foals whispered amongst each other at that, and Snails beamed. "And that's not all! She also gave me this little guy!" He opened up his saddlebag and took out a jar which contained a big beetle. He let the beetle out, which scampered around for a bit, and then picked up a stone and hefted it over its head.

"It's a Hercules beetle!" said Snails. "The strongest beetle in Equestria! It's awesome!"

The foals were still chattering about that when Truffle Shuffle ran up. "Hey, everypony, something weird happened! I was by Diamond Tiara's house earlier, and she was actually waved and said hello to me!" He paused. "I think she's been replaced by an alien!"

"Woah!" said Featherweight. "Weird! Why would she be so nice?"

Snails smiled as he listened to the theories. He didn't tell them about the letter he'd gotten from Mr. Greengrass in Canterlot explaining that, seeing as how it was unfair and mean for Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon to be so horrible to him, they would be receiving a certain catalogue in the mail that would make them much nicer for a while. After all, he'd been asked to keep it a secret. And while he normally wasn't a very vengeful pony, he thought that, in this one case, it would be okay to let the two bullies stew for a couple of days.

Besides, they didn't really matter. What mattered was that he was Snails, a great little colt and a wonderful brother, who had bugs and ice cream and all kinds of good things. He had great friends, a spectacular teacher, and a wonderful town where he lived and learned and played. And he had an amazingly incredible sister, who would always fight the bad ponies of the world to make sure that all the little ponies would be treated with kindness and fairness and justice.

Snails smiled in contentment. I have a good sister. And I'm a good brother. What could be better than that?

"Hey, Snails!" He turned to see Raindrops flying down towards them. "There's a little extra cloud-stuff floating in from the Everfree today. Want me to make you a cloud ant?"

Snails grinned, scooped up his beetle, and ran towards his wonderful sister. More than anything, he thought. More than anything.

Author's Note

If you're interested in what Max did to get yelled at, make sure you're following 'Climbing the Mountain' by Talon&Thorn. That should come up in one of the later chapters.

It was really fun writing Snails with the ice cream headache medallion, and with bugs, and... actually, he's fun in general.

So, everyone learned a lesson. Cheerilee learned that some ponies in the government can be trusted and should be made use of, Max learned that some ponies have good reason to distrust the government and that he should work hard to restore its reputation, Raindrops learned that forgiveness can be better than perpetuating a cycle of revenge, Snails learned that he's awesome, and Fisher learned that it doesn't pay to be a bad pony. I'd say that's a good set of morals. :-)