My little Short Stories 2- Paradise Edition

by Paradise Oasis

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other
Length: 42839

A new batch of short stories, brought to you by the one and only- Paradise!? Follow the accounts of this Pegasus librarian of a pony community!

A new batch of short stories, brought to you by the one and only- Paradise!? Follow the accounts of this Pegasus librarian of a pony community! (Art by L.V.914)

Published 2014-04-17 05:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2015-03-17 21:09:27 UTC

Another Day in Paradise, part 2

Another Day in Paradise, part 2

"There you go, Galaxy! Right in the astronomy section, where I said it would be!" I exclaim to the parting unicorn, before I rush back over to my book. "Have fun making this year's forecasts and star charts!"

Having finally gotten Dream Castle's mystical- talking astrologer out of my mane, I was hoping to finally return to my book, when I heard the sound of flapping wings behind me. "Now what?" I groaned. With a sigh, I turned around, expecting to find another distraction- er, I mean Pegasus customer needing my help. What I saw instead was looking into the most beautiful pair of deep blue eyes I had ever seen.

"Oh, hey there, Paradise!" The perfectly sculpted mass of horse flesh attached to those wonderful eyes addressed me. "Hope I'm not disturbing you, but Sweet Stuff told me I'd find you in here!"

"Oh! Hello, Trucker!" I reply, blushing in embarrassment with the object of my earlier fantasizing standing in front of me. "Y-you looking for a book?"

"Actually, I had heard you got a new adventure book in." He replied, grinning. "And you know how much I love those, especially ones with lotsa action!"

Oh boy, do I ever know that! Unlike his sibling, Trucker's cutie mark doesn't indicate a love of fast moving vehicles. Rather, it's an indicator of his love of fantastic adventures- in fact, he's gone through every action and adventure book in my fiction section already. That's... kind of the main reason I have a thing for him, us both having the same passion, and all.

"Oh, I was just reading it right now." I reply, gesturing to the open hardcover on the table with my hoof. "But I can let you check it out, and I'll finish reading it when you return it."

"Oh no, that wouldn't be fair to you!" He replied, sitting down in on of the chairs. "I have an idea... why don't we both read it from where you left off, and then I'll take it home and read the first part later!"

I knew he was just trying to be nice, spoiling the ending for himself just so I can finish. But it would be fun to have such a handsome stallion reading one of my stories wit me, so I sit down and pick up the book with my wings. As i begin to read again, we are both drawn back into the world between the pages...

...

"I have a better idea!" The injured stallion declares, tackling the tribal pony, and taking his spear. "Why don't we both fight these brutes of, together!"

Nodding in agreement, I jump into battle beside him, thrusting my spear this way and that. Together, we send many of the savages flying, felling our foes right and left, and sending the remaining fiends scurrying off into the jungle. But we have no time to celebrate, as a darlk shadow emerges from the trees, and the cruel leader of the pony tribe stands before us.

"Bah! Those worthless buffoons can't do anything right!" A tall, hideous looking anthropomorphic pig woman  snorts. "If I want Dream Valley ponies cooked up into a beauty potion for my lovely and radiant skin, I guess I'll have to do it, myself!"

"Oh no, it's the evil swine sorceress, Porcina!" I declare, raising my spear defensively. "The evil witch who turns ponies to glass with a touch!"

"Fear not, my lovely maiden most fair!" Trucker replied, raising his spear next to mine. "For we shall fell this foul beast... together!"

The witch suddenly lunged at us, and the battle was quickly joined between hoer, heroine, and villainess. Magic bolts flew from her hooftips, turning the trees to glass as we dodged this way and that.  Trucker and I quickly leapt in and out, stabbing here and their on her fat, slobbery body with our spears wherever we could find and opening. Frustrated at our success, the morbidly obese witch leapt into the air and came down, trying to crush us from above. Seeing our opportunity, we both leapt out of the way, then thrust our spears up into her bloated abdomen.

"AGUGHHHHHH!" She squealed, as black liquid and puss oozed out. "You stupid little ponies have destroooooyyyed meeee! Aguaghhhhh!"

And so, the foul beast died at our hands. The tribal ponies, grateful at finally being liberated from their slavery to the evil witch, take us back to their village to celebrate, roasting a freshly killed pig sorceress over an open fire for our feast. there in the shadow of the campfire, we gaze into each others eyes longingly, having bonded over the adventure we had shared together.

"I.. .never got the chance to thank you for saving me, Paradise." Trucker said with a smile, lying next to me on the soft sand. "You were really wonderful out there."

"You weren't so bad yourself, speed boy." I reply flirtatiously moving closer to him. "In fact, I wonder just how fast and dangerous an adventure pony like you really is..."

Putting our arms around each other, our lips gently press together in the shadow of the crackling firelight. Our few crude garments quickly shed, our two Pegasus bodies became one in the passionate heat of the jungle, as we-

....

"Hey Paradise, you in here?!" Moondancer's voice echoed through the library, as she came trotting inside. "Locket wanted me to find a book for her on security system, and- HOLY HORSEMASTER WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING ON THE LIBRARY FLOOR!?!"

Needless to say, Trucker and I had a lot of explaining to do... ah ha ha...

.... ohhhhh boy.

My Chief joy at easter

My Chief joy at easter

Top o' the mornin' ta ya, lads and lasses, hope you're having a fine Spring Festival on this fine day! Oh, such fun it would be, ta be a foal on a holiday like this! Colrin' yer eggs, watin' fer a basket o' candy from the Easter Pony- Aye remeber the joys o' this holidy from when aye was a wee colt. Ah, the memories...

Och, beggin yer pardin, aye should introduce meself! Me name's Chief, and I be Dream Valley's lead fire pony. Perhaps ya've seen me around the castle, the big white stallion with the red hose cutie mark, and the blue and white mane. I spend most of me days travelin around the valley, puttin out fires both inside and outside the castle. It's not an easy task, ta be certain. But when I hack through that door inna burnin buildin, and carry a cryin' and terrified filly ta her thankful parents- tis' a rewardin' enough task ta be doin my dangerous and deadly job, says I!

Och, yer be wondrin about my accent, eh? Tis true, ol Chief is cartainly a native of Dream Valley. The isle of Pony be my home, far across the great sea, where I was raised from a young foal. I knew early in me life that fightin' fires was me callin'. Aye helped put out a nasty one in me grandfather's barn as a colt, to be sure. But me wanderings in my teen years brought me far and wide ta the confederacy, and with no firefighters in Dream Valley- well, there was a wide open space fer me special talent, there was.

I also found a space fer myself in the heart of a clever young lass here in the valley, me lovely Wind Whistler. A sharp and clever mind she has; smar as a whip, and twice as fast. But ach,, she's praobably already tol ye about tha', and that's not what Paradise wanted me ta talk about today, anyway. No, Ah'm here at tell ye about one particular Spring Festival ah attended in Bright Balley- the holiday the humans call easter. It was a day I'll never forget, to be sure, in all the days of me life that come aftar.

Bein' Dream Castle's lone firefighter, I was asked one particular year ta come to the annual Bright Valley Spring Parade, I was. Bein' the nice and hospitable sort, the fireponies of Bright Valley let me ride on top o' the engine with them, throwing candy down fer all the little fillies an' colts ta pick up. Now, notgettin' a chance fer recognition much in me line o' work, I jumped at the chance to ride in a parade, with siren's ablazin, and lights flashin! And all the happy an' smilin faces o' the little oneswas reward enough ta satisfy me to be certain.

But it ws then I noticed all o' the little foals were not enjoyin' the parade, I did. One sad little filly, a blue lass with a purple mane, seemed ta not be able ta get the candy, not movin as fast as her little friends as they scarmbled fer the candy. It was then that I was seen' she had a bad leg, an' was barely tollin along to get th' little choclate sweets and fruit candies we were tosin' to the lads and lasses. She was a little filly come up from new Equestria, she was, 'ere to recieve treament on 'er legs from the unicorn doctors. The sight o' her touched somethin' in me heart, it did, and I decided I was going to do something about it!

"Ach, bring tha' little lass up here!" I told the other fireponies. "So tha' she kin ride beside me!" Seein' the limp in her leg, an' knowin my intent to try an' brighten the little lass's spirits, the lads pulled her up, and put her beside us to ride on the truck. The little lass- who's name  was Hopscotch, aye lytar learned- seemed really pleased ta get ta throw the candy out hersalf. She loved the sounds o' the big red engine's siren a blazin' in her ear, she did. An she loved looking back on the unicorn marchin' band behind us, an' the pony clowns goofin' off in front of us! Ta be sure, I've never in all me years seen a filly so excited or so happy!

But it didn't end there for the lass, on no! After the parade, we made shore she was farst in line for the easter pony, an' she even got a whole basket of eggs aftar she got to sit in the easter pony's lap, she did! Hopscotch then got 'er picture takin' with the whole fire brigade, before we returned her to her greatful parents (who had been more than happy to give thar permession when we farst brought her on th' truck, aye might add.) Ahad aye really think we made tha' sweet little pony's day that Spring Festtival, tha' we most certainly did!

So ta all yah laddies and lasses celebratin' the holiday this Spring, please spare a' kind ward an action for the ponies less fourtunate tha' you.  Far while yah may be enjoyin a sweet load of candy, and havin' a good time colorin yer eggs, thiar may be a pony out there who canna even lift a hoof ta color an egg! Now, if ye'll excuse me, aye hear the fire bell ringin' over me head. Aye need ta ger me red firepony's helmet an' axe, an head ta the ponies tha' need me most! But aye'll never ferget the little filly whose happiness, despite her own misery an pain,  made this holiday even more special for this foolish old stallion. Anyway, happy spring festival to ye all!

Beannachtaí na Cásca!

Chief Whistler

Ergonomically Terrific

Ergonomically Terrific

Salutations, readers! My nomenclature is Wind Whistler, and my function is Dream Valley's resident chief scientist and engineer. My mate is the fire stallion chief, and my daughter is the little filly, Moondream. My appearance consist of a blue coat and pink mane, along with a pair of asymmetrical wings and a three whistle cutie mark. I am normally the mare all other ponies come to with their technical problems. I'm also the mare all other ponies believe has no feelings.

My upbringing was an unremarkable one. Born in Dream Castle, my father was a royal guard whose life functions had ceased before I was old enough to know him. My mother, Wind Wisher, was a former singer and celebrity from Bright Valley. If you were to dig through some old  magazines from that town, I'm certain you'd see a young pink earth mare with a purple and aqua mane and pinwheel cutie mark, and wearing a stage show tiara and translucent skirt. Her star having long since faded by the time of my birth, she was determined to keep living in the spotlight through me.

When it was discovered that I held the same singing talent, I was immediately put into a rigorous routine of lessons and signing practice from my third birthday. I was a different pony at that impressionable age, a singing and whistling airhead who just thought all the glitter and singing and pretty outfits and spending time with mommy was fun. I also did not realize how jealous my parental unit was of my singing voice, even as she attempted to mold me into a miniature version of herself. Still, I excelled at my special talent, making it into the Dream Valley's foals choir by the time I was five- a record bested by the only superior singer in the castle to me, Medley.

That's not to say I didn't have a life outside the performances, however. There was school and friends, of course, My mother was intelligent enough to know I needed some normalcy if I was to develop properly. I was one of the ditzy girls then, and my best friends were Fizzy and Gusty. I had no concern with any sort of intellectual pursuits in those days- can you actually believe I once told my teacher 'gee, math is hard for fillies'? Urgh. My greatest concern during that time was going to the mall in bright valley with the other girls, going on a shopping spree, and getting my hooves done up in the wildest colors.

Then the teenage years hit, and I discovered colts. Now, I was never the filly about town that Firefly was; but I did have my share of amorous pursuits in my youth. Most exciting was Four Speed, who would take me four rides in that big, powerful machine of his, the humans called a truck.  We'd go racing across the hills and rocks at an accelerated pace, and I admired how he could control the speed and power of that awesome engine. We then experimented with ways to back the back windows of his truck fog up, and Four Speed discovered that I was far faster than that truck of his...

*Ahem*, yes, well... suffice to say I was content with my life as an oblivious ditz, until the day my 'benefactors'  entered my life. That day left this filly changed forever, and I abandoned the path of shallow emotion for the path of logic. To my advantage, my grades improved  astronomically, and my academic progress excelled. But my personal life went to pieces around me. Where once I had been more outgoing and sympathetic when one of the girls was going though their teenage dramas, now I would simply sit back and assess the situation with analytical logic. Four Speed terminated our relationship when I was able to rebuild his engine better than he could.

"I don't wanna date a computer on four legs." He told me, ignoring my extremely wordy pleas.

But perhaps the most injurious occurrence was my mother's reaction, once she learned my special talent for singing was gone. My teachers said I was concentrating too much on the technical aspects of the music, and  not 'putting my heart into the music' or some such sentimental nonsense. She abandoned me as I turned away from my artistic pursuits, and started reading the technical books in the castle library. Mother was never able to accept, that I had become the only pony in history to ever change special talents at the start of my adult life.

Most of my friends abandoned me, declaring I had become an emotionless machine. Only Fizzy stayed with me, still acting as if I had never changed at all. Gusty, my one time best friend, felt betrayed and took every opportunity to remind me of my lack of emotions. I buried myself in my work and made many great innovations for Dream Valley. Queen Majesty was so impressed, she gave me the castle's abandoned underground lab to work in. It didn't take long for this Pegasus to get the facility up and running again, and I was soon going about the task of creating many wonders.  But despite all my achievements, I still felt a gaping hole in my life, and logic dictated it was from the solitude my new enlightened state had caused me.

Ergo, the solution demanded was an end to my solitude- I soon decided it was time to start a family of my own. Chief, the white earth stallion who was the chief of Dream castle's fire and Rescue, seemed like a logical candidate. So when he showed great affection towards me at a moonlight dance on the deck of Captain Barnacle's ship, I consented to a lifebond with him. The birth of our daughter heralded a series of new goals and challenges, which I was confident my intellect could overcome. Having a family has been a very rewarding and enriching experience.

But there are times I worry. My voice never rises above it's boring monotone, barely reflecting the anger, or joy, or sadness I'm feeling inside. When Moondreamer was growing up, it was always her godmother Fizzy who held her, or comforted her when she cried. No instinctual maternal reaction came to me. I've heard the other mares gossiping, saying that they heard from the stallions that- that Chief has stated that when we are- when we are together... it's like kissing and making love to a machine, automatically going through the motions. I know he would never state this hypothesis, but even the suggestion has caused me undue emotional distress.

Logically, it really doesn't bother an organic computer like myself, why should I care about the primitive emotional reflexes my fellow ponies are afflicted with? I am beyond such petty concerns as sentiment and love, what these walking piles of biological pulp think or feel about me is irrelevant. I don't need these lesser ponies, or their useless 'feelings' to survive. I can function autonomously without their moronic friendship, and am in fact functioning better without them.

Every time I tell myself that, I almost believe it... until my heart slowly starts to break, and I hate myself for even thinking it. I love Chief, and Fizzy, and my baby more than life itself, more than any of these silly ponies could ever know. They have no idea how painful it is to see my little baby cry after she's hurt her leg from falling off the swing. And when she needs a mother's affection, the only thing that can come of of my mouth is logical statistics listing why she is not injured that badly. Those monsters... they took my ability to express my feelings, and  I am unable to tell the ponies I care about how much I love them.

Maybe… it's better this way. Maybe now, I really am nothing more than a biological machine.

All Locket up

All Locket up

Locks... be they key, combination, or padlock, there is no pony who is more fascinated by them than I, nor is there any pony whom understands them better. Since I was a little filly, I've been fascinated with how to undo any mechanism designed to keep somebody out. I had to be able to open any door that was bolted, and I had to know how to open any passageway that was sealed. As I grew, I became equally obsessed with finding a way to keep the very locks I opened up closed, and I began to study with the greatest locksmiths and trap masters in Dream Valley. Locks and seals became an obsession for me- I'm pretty sure I was the only filly in the castle who had a Fillydelphian death padlock on her diary... gave my snooping brother a sore hoof for three weeks.

Now that I am fully grown, I am mistress of all the locks and traps in the dungeons beneath Dream Castle. It is I who design the chains and shackles that hold evil mages fast, negating their dark magic so they do not escape. And it is my chains and gates that hold the most vicious and cruel psychos amongst all the races trapped down here in this dark and dank sinkhole. I must not look very intimidating walking or flapping around Dream Castle; a pink Pegasus with a pink and white mane and gemstone eyes. And it's true, off duty in my social hours, I'm a simple mare who likes hanging out with my friends Heart Throb and Twilight Sky, running races along the surfaces of the rivers and trolling for cute stallions with the two of them.  But that's only my calm and gentle day persona, the pony I am at night is a horse of a much different color.

As the sun sets, I trot down the stairs into the dungeon, and salute to my guard sentries as I enter the depths. These brave officers respect me, knowing how I got each and every one of these scars that cover my once-pretty body. Their respect isn't shared by the denizens of the cells in the hallway I now walk though, as they harbor emotions of quite a different nature towards me. Murderers and thieves stare out at me from behind the bars of iron, their gazes filled with a mix of utter hatred and utter fear. I intimidate these cowards to the point, that a mere stare is enough to make them cower at the back of their cells.  They know what I can do to them if they get out of line, and that I am perfectly willing and eager to do it.

So many different fiends, so many different ways to discipline them. Porcina the swine witch- she actually thought she'd be allowed to simply become the Bushwoolie's hairdresser, after she tried to genocide every living thing in Dream Valley by turning them to glass. Majesty had me order my guards retrieve her from the Bushwoolie's den, and I now keep her entertained by lighting the flame jets I installed in her cell walls whenever she gets out of line. It's always amusing to here that fat sow squeal when she thinks I'm going to fry her up into sausage, especially when she doesn't realized I prefer baked holaska over pork.

Beezin... this goblin freak is another fun one to play with.  We keep his animated magic wand in the cell next to him, and whenever he starts one of his insane rants I flip the switch and let the wand in to entertain him for awhile. Brought to life by his own magic paint, the wand loves to torture it's former owner for hours before we drive it back into it's own cell. It's a riot hearing him wail as the wand changes him into various forms, making sure each transformation is more painful than the last. My only regret is we have to stop the wand just as it's getting good each time, otherwise that little freak would kill him.

The others are just as much fun. I run the gizmonks through a maze with electrified walls for their exercise period, it's a riot to hear them freak every time they get shocked from touching the sides. And Arabus the shadow genie... I just love hit him with those red hot sun lamps I installed in his enclosure. His shriveled wails are to pathetic to reach my equine ears, so there's not much fun in disciplining him. All the others freaks in this place- trolls, goblins, witches, and even a few changelings- all have their own personal nightmares set up for them. I even have a few cells set up for possible future residents, three connected cages are ready for the witches from the volcano if we can ever fully subdue them, and even a superheated cell for that  penguin king with Darwinist morality, should he ever decide to go rouge again.

What, you think I'm too hard on these villains? Really? These lunatics would not hesitate to do horrible things to every pony in the castle if they were ever to get free. I've experienced firsthand what misplaced kindness towards these freaks gets you, when I made the mistake of trusting one of the prisoners I was tasked with watching. It happened one day, when Firefly had brought in a brigand responsible for robbing several of the ponies traveling in and out of Dream Valley. He was a dashing Saddle Arabian stallion, whose charisma and charm could make an ice ogre melt. Ignoring all of the other ponies’ advice, I responded willingly to the well-built horse's flattery and honey-filled words, giving him more freedom than I should have allowed.

Sadly, I would pay dearly for thinking with my flank instead of with my head. That sleaze ball used the privilege of being out of his cell I granted him to start a prisoner riot, which my guards and I were barely able to put down. But when I went to personally subdue the stallion who had taken advantage of my kindness, he rewarded my tender mercy by stabbing me twice in the face, and putting my eyes out. How ironic, the stallion to whom my hormones had blinded me to how foul of an equine he really was, had taken my beautiful blue eyes from me. I later had a pair of ugly crystals eyes stuck into my skull as replacements, but I would never trust any of the scumbags I would watch over ever again.

I will admit, my job isn't  exactly a pleasant one... but it's a job somebody in the castle has to do. I'm just happy that there are few humans, gnomes, elves, or even ponies in my dungeons, it lets you know who your friends and enemies are. Still, I wonder who'll be the next interesting guests in my little menagerie of rouges down here. It'll be very interesting to what new disciplines I can concoct next. Ah well, I think some of the goblins are acting up again, so if You'll excuse me, I have a job to do!

Warden Locket

Forgotten History

Forgotten History

"Bramely?" Princess Cadence calls out in a worried tone, looking around frantically. "Bright Bramely, where are you?!"

My princess calls to me, and though I am currently busy looking over some treaties that need to be signed, my duty calls, and I must go to her.  With a sigh, I adjust my yellow glasses, I trot out of my study, and make my way towards Misty Mountain’s throne room. The guards of course, bowed to me in respect- an orange earth mare with a purple mane and apple cutie mark- a proud member of the Apple family, though my special talent has little to do with apples. I am the pony who handles the mundane day-to-day matters of the bureaucracy of Misty Mountain, helping my lady in her rule of this great Ponyland citadel.

"What is it, my princess?" I ask, bowing before the throne. "What can I do to serve you?"

"Where- where am I?" She asks, looking around nervously with a wild look in her eyes. "What am I doing here!?"

"You're at Misty Mountain, my Princess; your kingdom." I reassure her in a soothing tone. "This is your home, where you rule over all of us, your loyal subjects."

"The Crystal Empire is my kingdom, Bright. Not this strange place" She informed me defiantly, her eye twitching. "Tell me, where is my beloved Shining Armor?"

Staring at her sadly, I can only shake my head in sorrow. Although she is the last surviving immortal alicorn princess, Mi Amore Cadenza is not the intelligent and wise mare that ponies once believed alicorns to be. Much to our city's personal shame, our ruler is a nervous and blubbering mess that has trouble remembering things day to day in her life. Most ponies believe it due to her advanced age brining on senility- but I and a few other know it is something far, far worse.

"Come my princess, your royal audiences are done for the day." I tell her soothingly, gently guiding her off her throne. "It is time for you to go to bed."

Most of Ponyland forgets the fact, that they owe this brave mare for all she has done for our Confederacy. She has sacrificed more then any other pony for the sake of our civilization, and there is no way we can ever begin to repay this mare who is the last of her kind. It angers me that most ponies look upon her eternally beautiful form with pity, feeling sorry for our princess for her shattered and still-crumbling mind.

During the Grogar wars, the old goat tyrant had sought to destroy even the memory of Equestria- his troggle armies going out of their way to ransack every archive and library in the land, and destroying every historical tome that they could get their claws on. That is why our historian Tornado has had such trouble piecing our history back together from the few scattered fragments of journals, letters, and documents that survived the fall of Equestria, our written history only goes back five hundred years to the founding of the confederacy. Everything Tornado has written about is speculation based on a few historical scraps that remain... in truth, we know nothing about the history of ponies before Ponyland.

The memories of our beloved Princess would have been wonderful here- but alas, she was determined to lead that final assault on the evil Grogar after the monster slew Princess Luna during the fall of Canterlot. She and her husband, Shining Armor- magically gifted with an unnatural long life due to lifebonding with an alicorn- led the final assault on Tambelon that was the last battle on the Grogar wars. As the pony army they led battled the troggles, and Shining Armor fought  the goat in hoof-to-hoof combat, while Cadence sought out and rung the giant bell that sent Grogar and his city back to the Dark Dimension.

Having defeated the goat tyrant and ended the war, the two fled from the vanishing Tambelon. But Grogar had one final trick up his sleeve- from the window of his tower, he struck the fleeing couple with an energy blast that knocked them to the ground.  But when Shining and Cadence awoke, the other ponies found that the spell that had stuck them had severely damaged their powers of recollection. In the centuries thereafter, Shining Armor’s memories faded in and out, his mind becoming as frail as a feeble old pony, whilst his body remained young, healthy, and strong. It was only a decade or two ago, that he quietly passed in his sleep, the magic keeping him young finally dissipating.

"Bramely, which way is my bedroom?" Cadence asked, looking around the hallways in confusion. "I can't seem to remember..."

"Follow me, my princess." I reply calmly, leading the child-like alicorn by the hoof. "It is not far."

It is truly a tragedy, an eternally young and beautiful pony do helpless like this. And a living source of pony memory. our history- Grogar had the last laugh, he knew what he was doing with that final spell. For the contradictory records that Tornado has recovered from the archives- one saying Twilight Sparkle became an alicorn, another saying she remained a unicorn all her life, or Dream Valley's records stating that their castle was built from the remains of the palace of the two sisters, while the Harmony Bearer's friendship journal states this became Twilight Sparkle's rainbow kingdom.  And Applejack, the one mare who could answer these contradictions remembers it one way one day, then another the next. The goat tyrant took more from us that our princess that dark day; with his final defeat, he took ponykind's  history from us.

"Here you go, my princess." I tell her soothingly, pulling back the sheets so she can climb into bed. "Please, call me or one of the servants if you need to use the bathroom or desire something to drink."  I advise her, remembering the one embarrassing time she had been  unable to remember how to get to the restroom in time. "Have a pleasant sleep, my princess."

"Thank you Bramely." She tells me softly, drifting  off into the repose of slumber. "You are so... good... to... me..."

Trotting out and closing the door, I recall the demands of Misty Mountain’s  junkers that our senile princess be retired, and Princess Silver Rain, born a few months after her father's death, should take the throne. Cadence deserves better than this, but I cannot hold off the desires of the nobles forever. Trotting out and looking at the evening sky above, I try to imagine the beautiful colors and the stars appearing being shaped by two caring sisters putting on a show for their mortal subjects.

It's so sad, Equestria was a land ruled by alicorns, benefiting from their love and superior wisdom. Now the bloodline of Queen Sunsparkle rules Ponyland, the nobility of each Ponyland citadel - and even the council of Princess ponies-  using their linage from her as their reason for ruling.  Even Silver Rain has married into the house of Sunsparkle, ensuring that Misty Mountain will one day be brought under the divine right to rule, just like Hoofkaido, Bright Valley, Fort Dash, and all the rest.

I wish the truth of our past could be recovered, but there remains no other sources we could answer our questions. But perhaps it is better this way, forcing us to look to our future, instead of back to the glories of yesterday.  I am happy for the world that I live in, happy for my wonderful husband and beautiful children. And I'm proud of the sacrifices ponies such as my princess made, even though it cost them everything to make them. For out of that uncertain past of Equestria, has been born a bright future for Ponyland. And we ponies could not ask for a better world to live in!

Evil Reflects on Itself

Evil Reflects on Itself

Midnight Castle, three hundred years ago...

"SCORPAN!" The dark lord roared angrily, drumming his fingers on the arm rest of his throne. "Where are you, you worthless worm!? I command you to stand before me!"

Reclining in the shadows, Tirek heard the approaching footsteps of his winged beast man minion, and also heard the bitter muttering under his breath as he approached. The door of the throne room slowly squeaked open, and Scorpan walked up and kneeled before the colossal and frightening presence.

"I am here, master... " The conflicted minion growled, looking down at the floor to hide his contempt. "What is it you desire of me?"

Scorpan dared a glanced upward, and caught the sight of a clawed hand stroking a small bag with the sound of a beating heart coming out of it. If there was one being everyone in Ponyland hated more than any other, it was this… this abomination. Tirac had ruined so many lives, and destroyed so many innocent souls. He was feared and loathed by the inhabitants of this land far and wide, but none hated the villain more than Scorpan himself.

"We lost too many Strydons in the last raid on Grundle Land." The tyrant hissed, pointing a hand with a spiked gauntlet on it at his cowering lackey. "Bring in the latest crop of ponies we captured, so that I may replenish my forces."

Scorpan nodded, snapping his fingers and causing the lizard guards to bring in seven screaming and terrified ponies whom they held chained before the throne.  Their pleas and cries of terror fell silent, as the horned devil rose and stood before them.

"Oh no...!" One of the mares pleaded. "Please, let us go!"

"SILENCE!" He roared, sick of their whining. "You all belong to me, now!" Reaching for the bag on his arm rest, the horned centaur pointed the bag at the helpless ponies standing before him. "Behold, the power of DARKNESS!"

The shadowy band of dark energy wrapped around the small group of ponies, twisting and warping thier bodies as it reshaped them into snarling and growling dragons. The band of darkness rushed back into the bag, as Tirac waved the lizard guards off with thier newest recruits.

"Guards, take these strydons below with the others." The dark lord snarled. "And as for you, Scorpan, you'd best go down and see to that little pet Dragon of yours. His is driving the guards mad with his whining, and I'd hate to have to remove his head to shut him up!"

"As you wish, my master." Scorpan snarled, before walking out of the room, flexing his bat-like wings. Foolish whelp, Tirac thought to himself, the only reason he kept that stupid dragon of Twilight Sparkle's alive was that he served as a living trophy from the one pony who had actually defeated him in battle. Tormenting Spike the dragon was the only way he had to torment the long-dead alicorn, making the dragon miserable just as he made Scorpan miserable.

"Guards!" The giant horned horror commanded. "Bring the Dragon Spike before me at once!"

With a grunt, the lizard guards went deep into the bowaels of the castle, and brought forth a small, pink and scaly purple dragon who cowered before the dark lord's throne. Looking down at his pathetic prisoner, Tirac growled in a voice that would make the mightiest Stallion cower.

"Y-you wanted something of me, master?"  Spike whimpered, in a pathetic nasally voice. "How may I serve you?"

"Stop your prattling, you scale-covered whelp!" The centaur roared, making the baby dragon shake with fear. "My guards have complained about your pathetic whining, and I will not stand for you disrupting the peace of my dominions!"

The young Dragon's eyes  went wide, and he looked like he was going to wet the castle floor. Tirac enjoyed these moments of power over the helpless and weak, and he loved relishing every moment that  he could make all creatures miserable.

"Please forgive me, master!"  The little dragon pleaded, clinging to the centaur's hoof. "I never meant to make you mad!"

"SILENCE!"  The centaur roared, kicking the baby dragon away. "Return to the tunnel below, at once! And if I hear one more whimper out of your disgusting scaly mouth, I will pin your miserable hide up on the dungeon wall!"

The little dragon shrieked, and quickly scurried away. It was hard to believe this pathetic wretch had once been the loyal assistant to the great Twilight Sparkle. Spike had been captured in a raid on Ponyville during the Grogar wars, and had been a favorite object of torture  for the dark lord. After several escape attempts, he had ordered the little dragon whipped and beaten to the point of losing his sanity.

But it had slightly backfired on Tirac, and Spike could barely remember Twilight or Equestria or anything to do with his imprisonment. So Tirac kept him around as a target of his anger, and he and Scorpan had befriended each other in their misery- the dragon and his hated brother....

Scorpan... no.... my brother, whom betrayed him to the ponies in a previous life. How he hated that infernal beast man, who had betrayed him to the ponies, and locked me away in Tartarus for a millennia. I've gone through many Scorpans over the years, many different unwitting fools who defied me, and I transformed them with the rainbow of darkness into copies of my traitorous brother. The original Scorpan may be long gone, but he will always be here for me to cause suffering towards!

And that body; that frail, weakened body is still locked away in Tartarus where Twilight Sparkle put me so long ago. I now have this powerful new form, made for me by that unwitting fool Midnight, from whom I also stole the rainbow of Darkness. But his old body still remains there, a back up in case anything ever happens to his current form.  But he doubts it will come to that, for Tirek had a plan that will finally bring a final end to these ponies, once and for all. They and their world would be buried in a night that never ends, the Dark lord would see to that! But for now, he'd have to settle for the smaller pleasures...

"Sorpan, I am extremely hungry!" The centaur demanded. "Have the guards send one of the newborn foals from the dungeons to be prepared in the kitchens!"

The Song of Salomare, part one

The Song of Salomare- part one

Saddle Arabia... the mysterious kingdom of the Orient. Land of gold and spices, of silks and scimitars, this sun- scorched desert is home to a mighty race of horses who maintain a proud warrior culture in these harsh environs. To the citizens of Ponyland this enchanting land has always felt like an exotic paradise, and the natives have always welcomed their barbarian cousins from the north with open friendliness and hospitality, at home with our similar faiths, autocratic feudal culture, and reverence for clan and monarchal authority both of our herds share.

But this had not been the case in the days of old Equestria, where the old empire's ideals of freedom and culture were in conflict with the customs and traditions of this proudest of nations. It was only through the friendship and good will of the ruling alicorn princesses, with the Sultan and Sultana, that relations were at least kept civil between these two proud cultures. So mistrust and suspicion existed between ponies and horses, and it was unthinkable for two equines from these extremely disparate herds to be close, let alone be friends. But here I shall relate the tale of two such friends, and how their friendship affected the world around them.

Her name was Salomare, daughter of the Sultan, and princess of the this rich desert land. Raised by her nursemaids and the gelded palace eunuchs, this young white mare with a auburn mane and tail. From the moment she was born, her blue eyes were filled with wonder and excitement at the world around her. Her fillyhood was filled with days of running around the palace, playing tricks on all of the royal courtiers and foreign dignitaries, and driving her caretakers mad by running around the palace without her veil on. The Sultan and Sultana made certain their little desert bloom knew only happiness in her young life.

And so, the delicate little jewel did grow up safe and protected within the confines on the royal palace, but the safety within the royal harem did not give her much chance to ever make friends. The companionship of servants and caretakers was not the same as the love and companionship that comes with friends. The children of the servants would play with her when she was lonely, but she soon realized they only did so because thier parents told them to; she was always a pony apart. So the little filly was left sad and alone, until the day somepony new came to  Saddle Arabia.

"Your highnesses, may I present Princess Twilight Sparkle of Equestria, and her royal court."

The dignitaries from Equestria- Princess Salomare had heard tales of these strange ponies, equines who were smaller versions of horses like themselves, but she never could have imagined the miniature horses her parents described would be so interesting! The princess 's ladies in waiting were so colorful and friendly- especially the pink one, who played even funnier pranks than she did- but the princess herself was utterly incredible!  Both a Pegasus's wings and a unicorn's horn- no horse in Saddle Arabia possessed both of these gifts!

Salomare immediately attached herself to the princess, asking a thousand questions about everything the alicorn knew. The princess of friendship, so impressed with the young mare's thirst for knowledge, became something of a mentor to the heiress to the Saddle  Arabian throne during her goodwill visit to the desert land. Despite only being an earth horse, the princess soaked up all knowledge she could on both unicorn magic and Pegasus magic. But the more she learned about the wonders of other pony types, the more the future sultana wondered what she can do with no sorcery or weather magic.

"How can a lonely earth mare do anything for her subjects?"  Salomare asked  the princess of friendship. "I was born a princess, and I am in no way the princess you are!"

"Patience, my faithful student... your time will come soon enough."  The older and wiser mare consoled her. "The symphony of life has many notes, and the time will come when the whole world will hear your beautiful, beautiful song."

And after the alicorn princess had departed back to her own land, young Salomare tried to live up to her mentor's ideals of Friendship as best she could. To her subjects she was determined to be a wise and just ruler, respecting both the traditions and customs of her herd, and to share the new teachings of the nature of friendship that Twilight Sparkle had brought to her. Salomare, who felt she had no other distinguishable talents or traits, would then make her mark upon this world by being a just and capable ruler. And when her parents passed on to the next world and Salomare ascended the throne, the Saddle Arabian mare was as good as her word.

But then the day came when misfortune would strike these horses of the desert. In that age the blarks, a proud race of mole-like merchants who dwelled beneath the deserts; Saddle Arabia's answer to Equestria's diamond dogs, and Ponland's grundle tribes. To this day it is not recalled what brought  the wrath of these mole folk down upon the desert horses- some say a Saddle Arabian merchant at a bazaar cheated a blark nobleman on a trade, others say one of the many noble sheiks who visited Queen Salomare's court had let  a deragtory word slip about the 'junk dealers' who dwelled beneath the desert sands. But whatever the cause, the horses had aroused the anger of their underground neighbors.

At first, none of the Saddle Arabians took the diminutive Blark's threats and warnings seriously... until all the water sources in the desert began to dry up, that is. The mole folk cut off access on the surface to all of the wells and water sources that bubbled up towards the surface, causing all of the oasis and few rivers of the desert to dry up. Whole towns and villages of the horses became deserted overnight, and the Saddle Arabians began to quarrel amongst themselves over the scarce water supplies that still remained.  Pain and suffering spread even to the capital, where the cries of the horses soon reached the ears of their benevolent ruler.

"Save us, great Sultana!" Her faithful followers cried out in their misery. "Don't let the harsh winds of the desert swallow us whole!"

Heartbroken over the suffering her subjects were enduring, Salomare was determined to find a new and clean source of water for the herd over which she ruled. An attempt to issue a royal apology to the blarks had failed, so great was whatever slight had been heaped upon the merchants that it was impossible to simply cover the wound the royal court's unicorn horse mages were unable to end the water shortage by their magic, and the Saddle Arabian Pegasus could not muster enough clouds in the harsh desert to bring the sweet, sweet rain that their lands so desperately needed. Finally, the beautiful young Sultana had no choice but to seek out aid herself, ignoring the customs and proud royal traditions of her herd.

"I must do something!" She cried aloud, asking to the desert djinns whom the Saddle Arabians honored to aid in her desperate Endeavour. Putting on her crown, saddle, and veil, the ruler of the desert horses chose a quiet moonlit night to begin her perilous quest.

Disguising herself beneath hood and cloak, the young unmarried queen snuck her way out of the royal palace, slipping past her mamluk knights who guarded the palace, and trotting her way out into the open desert.  Galloping her way out into the cool desert night, the strong and steadfast mare was already formulating a plan. A bold scheme that would take her to the one pony in all of the world who controlled all of the water supply - the mare decided she must seek out King Leo the wise, cousin to the royal alicorn sisters, and ruler of all the open oceans of this world. Only he could end the terrible water shortage that afflicted her country, and Salomare was determined to convince the great monarch of the undersea, no matter what it took!

Thus ends the first part of my recounting of the Saddle Arabian classic, the song of Salomare. Look forward soon to the next part!

Paradise Oaisis

The Song of Salomare, Part Two

The Song of Salomare, Part Two

Over hill and valley, over sand dune and oasis, did the desperate Salomare travel. Pushing on endlessly, the determined mare let neither exhaustion nor hunger nor any peril of the road stand in her way. Far, far away to the distant coast did she gallop, and there at last upon the shoreline of the gulf of Maretonia, her kingdom's  watery western border. The queen then did use an enchanted potion her mentor and friend had given her, granting the queen gills, and allowing her to descend to the world beneath the waves. As she slowly descended beneath the surface, sea creatures of every shape and size stared at this beautiful sight of amazement and wonder. But no marine creature moved to hinder her journey, allowing Salomare to descend deeper and deeper into the depths.

Walking along the bottom, the Saddle Arabian queen stared at the fascinating creatures spread out before her. But she could not let her amazement at the myriad of colored fish and glowing jellyfish deter her, and she soon came to the glowing lights of an underwater city. The sea ponies of the open ocean, so different and much more fish-like than their freshwater brethren, were surprised to see this land-dwelling pony entering their underwater dominions. But when they discovered the reason for her visit, wasted no time in securing her an audience before the great Leo, their beloved king.

"I am most pleased by your visit, oh great ruler of the desert." The great lord of the undersea greeted her, pleased that a land equine had come so far and through so much trouble to see him and his aquatic herd. "But what has brought you so far from home, here to my watery kingdom?"

Salomare, who had already been amazed by the sight of the Sea Ponies’ coral reef homes and glittering palace, had her breath taken away at the sight of the great monarch. A great bearded sea stallion resembling a lionfish, this blue scaled sovereign was far larger than any Saddle Arabian horse she had ever seen. As she stared at his magnificence, the desert sultana recalled the story of how the once alicorn Leo had led his followers beneath the waves ages ago, giving up their land pony forms in order to become creatures of the sea. The sight of this mighty horned form in the coral crown seemed only to confirm that fantastic fish story.

"Great king, I have come beneath the waves, to desperately implore your aid on behalf of my subjects." The mare pleaded, kneeling respectfully before the great monarch. "For our lands above the waters have become parched and dry, and my herd has no water to drink or grow our crops with."

The king nodded, absorbing what the young queen was saying to him. But Salomare wondered if he truly understood her plight. Could he even comprehend the misery and sorrow of living in such a dry and parched environment. How could she convey to him the pain of her people? How could she make an aquatic creature, one whose very existence was perpetually surrounded by the water her herd so desperately needed, understand how much the horses of Saddle Arabia were suffering?

"The day will come, Salomare, when you will sing your own beautiful song before the whole world..."

The advice of Twilight Sparkle echoed in the young queen's mind, along with the knowledge of what she had to do. And so, Salomare did burst into song, crying out across the waves in a beautiful chorus made up of only one pony.  She sang of her subject's suffering, of their parched throats and dry mouths. She sang of the hunger that came with withered fields and sun-scorched crops. And her voice echoed with her herd's desperate plea for water, imploring the great pony before her to aid in brining an end to Saddle Arabia's terrible suffering.

Not before or sense has such a song echoed out beneath the waves, and the Saddle Arabians claim it is for this reason that sea ponies burst into song'; they are trying to emulate the beauty they heard coming from Salomare on the fateful day. And as the mare finished her mournful lament, even the great king of the sea and his court were moved to tears by her song- though being beneath the water, no one could have told that it were so.

"Beautiful! A simply beautiful tale of your home, o Queen of the desert!" the great king declared, clapping his fins together in respect. "Be assured, I shall do everything in my power to assuage the great suffering of yourself and your herd!"

And so, Salomare returned home. Under their queen's direction, the Saddle Arabians plowed great channels to the sea, and let the salty waters of the oceans flow into them. And lo, the mighty King Leo spread his trident out over these waters, and made them fresh for the parched horses to water their crops with, and to quench their desperate thirst. The Saddle Arabians bowed to both their queen and their aquatic kindred beneath the waves, vowing to ever remember the great deeds these equines had done in their favor.

And that, my little ponies, is how a simple song of the heart, inspired by the friendship of two mares, did save an entire herd from death. Salomare may be more remembered for her great deeds and romances from later in her life, and King Leo more know for his wise and just rule over the oceangoing sea ponies over many, many centuries. But this first simple song of friendship, this small act of kindness towards a herd in need, is to me among their truly memorable acts. Salomare's song is one that I truly hope will echo in the hearts and minds of ponies and horses and everyone every where, so long as the magic of friendship exists.

Teddy the Terrible

Teddy the Terrible

Hey scuzz brains, what're you punks doing on my turf? Ohhh, you came over to this side of Coltonville to ask about me, huh? Yeah, I guess I really am that awesome! I'm sure you've all heard of me, Teddy Graham, the blue colt who's cooler than an ice cube? Yeah, my comb cutie mark is better than anything on these other loser's flanks, and I've got the most stylin mane in school, and every pony wishes they were me!

Ya know, I can't believe how many ponies in this town are such horrible losers. Stupid little colts and mares who go about thier stupid little lives, not realizing how pointless are of their stupid little stuff  they think is so important really is. Sooo, I decided, as a little foal,  to show them just how much they suck.  And so, I decided to start playing tricks on them- ya know, since they're all so stupid and all. And oh man, you wouldn't believe some of the crazy stunts I've pulled on these dumb ponies!

It's so much fun enlightening these morons, taking their stuff and playin ' keep away, starting fights with all the colts- you know, the usual. Like when I took Miss Hackney's chocolate shake out of her lunch, and poured ex-lax into it and put it back. Oh man, you should've seen the look on her face when she kept having to run to the bathroom between lessons! Or the time I stole Jing-a-ling and Ting-a-ling's ice cream cones, and ate both right in front of em'. Man, can those little kids cry really loud when stuff they don't like happens!

Yeah, I have a pretty cool life here in Coltonville, hangin ' around with my best buds, Ace and Lancer. Those  guys are alright, though I gotta put em' in their place sometimes. Lancer's always been really smart, and he think's he's all that cause he's better at school stuff than I am. And Ace might be really good and soccer and sports, but I can still kick his butt any day of the week. Those two can be real suckers sometimes, lettin' the girls turn thier heads like that. Those fillies have those two eatin out of their hooves sometimes, and it's up to me to knock some sense back into em' every now and then.

And speaking of the girls... yeah, Starlight and her little brat pack. Damn, why do I even put up with those seven. I mean, I know we grew up with em' and all, but that's no reason to put up with those little tramps the way we do. First there's Melody, a spoiled brat who thinks she's the star of everything, and treats all of the ponies around her like they aren’t worthy to lick the fertilizer off her hooves. Really, I don't know why the other girls put up with her.  Bon Bon's a fat little pig, always stuffing her ugly face with donuts and cakes and other crud. It's a wonder she doesn't get diabetes or have a heart attack or something. Actually, it would be kinda funny if she sat her flat flank in a chair and broke it, hah!

The others aren't much better. Patch is a really annoying little witch, though I do like how she can play tricks almost as good as me.  Clover's so clutzy I'm shocked she's doesn't fall on her freakin' face, though she's got a really hot older sister. (I can personally vouch for that- watched Medowlark take a shower through her window, and damn that mare's finer than a porno!)  Yeah, and Bright Eyes is just as much a know at all as Lancer is- I swear, those two should just go off somewhere behind the school and buck each other's eyeballs out- wait, that would make a whole bunch more of those brainy brats populating the earth. So yeah, flank that!

These girls are so much fun to pull crud on... you wouldn't believe how much fun it is to shove their faces into the desert table at lunch, you wouldn't believe how funny it is to see strawberry cream filling all over Bright Eyes's face. Or the time I let a whole case of army ants into Patch's house when they were having a slumber party- you shoulda seen those screaming fillies come running out of the house scratching around over the place. Or even when I threw that box of  tacks onto the ground outside Starlight's soda shop. It was hilarious seeing all seven of em' hopping around and screaming with about their hooves hurting. Totally funny man, I wish you coulda been there!

But the best gag I ever pulled was at the pool party they had at Melody's house last summer. The whole school had come over to celebrate the end of tenth grade, and there was a lot of snacks, dancing, and games. Ace snuck a case of hard cider into the party, and we slipped it into the punch. Boy, you should've seen how crazy the fillies acted after dowing a buncha glasses of that stuff! Melody jumped up on the table and started singing off key, and Patch and Bon Bon started swinging from the chandelier! Lancer had to be a prude and stop his precious Bight Eyes from touchin' the stuff. But we still got the treat of watching Clover and Starlight dance the mare-carena out by the pool before jumping into the water together.

But the one thing I didn't expect was the way Sweetheart began looking at me that night. Sweets has always been an okay pony- she's been a good friend, and always kept my secrets. I try to play a lot less mean tricks on her than I do on her friends, but sometimes she ends up getting hurt, too. I've always had a soft spot for that chick But the weird eyes Sweetheart  was giving me... I ain't never seen anythin' like that before. So I was really  wierded out when that filly led me back to Meldoy's spare room, and began waving her white flank with that pink heart cutie mark at me.

Then, before I could figure out what was going on, I felt her mouth up against mine. And oh wow the fireworks exploded in my head then! The pink maned doll ripped my sunglasses off, and pushed me back down onto the bed. Oh good gravy, I'd never scored like that before, but that girl showed me stuff that night that I'd never even seen in my entire life! Fortunately, Ace was nearby with his dad's camcorder at the time, and got all the girls acting drunk and stupid on tape! And when I saw it the next day, I got the most awesome idea for a prank ever!

On the first day of school next year, Ace and I decided to give all the kids in school quite an awesome show! We bullied Lancer comandeer the TV's in every classroom , and wow did all the students get an eyeful when we played the video! The whole school got to see those six acting like drunk morons on tape! Oh yeah, it was a major pain when Starlight's little herd of girls ganged up and beat the tar out of Ace and I, and then tossed us into the dumpster behind the school . But it was so worth the high hooves I got from all the other colts from pullin that prank. I'm  kinda glad I made Ace ditch the footage of sweetheart an' me from the video, though. Puttin' that up just woulda been too wrong, even for me. Her friends still aren't too happy with us, though*Sigh* I guess I'll never understand girls

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this little lesson in my awesomeness. Oh, and if you ever hear any gossip about me having a teddy bear, just ignore it. Cause if  I ever hear you saying anything bad about me, I swear I'll kick your sorry flank all over Coltonville!

Live and let Lancer

Live and let Lancer

Hey there, all you ponies! This is Lancelot Pants, Coltonville's number one genius colt, and the brains behind our little trio of friends.  Oh, I don't like to brag about my superior intellect that much, but much like Ace is the brawn of our circle, so I may properly claim to be the brains. Sometimes I even wonder if that neanderthal Teddy knows how to wipe his nose without me there to explain it to him. I truly do believe my sadly misguided -and easily confused- friends would be lost without my wisdom to guide them.  I truly do believe those two goofballs, they would be lost without me.

If you are not aware of me by reputation, I'm the handsome blue boy with the orange mane and fleur-de-lis cutie mark often seen working in the computer lab, or reading War and Ponies in the library. I come from a proud old wealthy Canterlot family, who migrated to the republic centuries ago (rumor has it our ancestors were once unicorns).  I've often helped the girls study for their tests, and received many nice rewards in return. Like the time I helped Melody prepare for her history final, and she gave me free tickets to a concert of the band she's in, the Rockin beats. Or when I helped Bon Bon get ready for a math exam, and received a gourmet dinner as a reward, Yes, sometimes helping others can be a very sweet thing, indeed.

What? Oh yes, you could say I am on better terms with the girls of Starlight's little gang than Teddy is- though to tell the truth, that really not a hard thing to do. I've often ratted Teddy and Ace out on some of the dirty tricks they've tried to pull on the girls, like that time they invited Sweetheart and Clover to go out for Pizza with them at Tony's Place, but weren't going to tell them that it was 'girl's pay for the date' night at the pizzeria. After I snitched on them, you should have heard those two fillies wail on those goofballs for trying a stupid stunt like that! Those two will often user the fillies crushes on them to wrap the seven fillies around their hooves. And frankly, I find the entire thing disgusting.

As to the girls themselves, I find of Starlight and her crew sufficient. Bon Bon is an excellent cook, even if she eats more of her ingredients than she puts into her cooking. Patch is an adventurous soul, even if she does often get herself in trouble way over her head. I swear that girl will head off into the jungle and find some lost civilization someday. Clover is a wonderful dancer and performer, though she lacks self confidence and lives forever haunted by the fear that her older sister will always be better that her. Not all of the girls are so sweet though, as Melody has an ego the size of  the Pony Dome, and Starlight is often my rival for the role of 'teacher's pet' with Miss Hackney.

And then there's Bright Eyes...

Oh great horsemaster, what words can be said about the Cyan beauty with and orange mane and haunting eyes that a colt can get lost in for hours. Starlight can say what she wants about being smart and wanting to be a teacher, but it is this little intellectual angel that is the true mastermind behind those seven beauties. That mare truly cares about the world around her, and she will make a wonderful environmentalist someday. Ace has long waffled back and forth between Starlight and Melody, and Teddy may show interest in Both Bon Bon and Sweetheart. But in my book Bright Eyes always has been, and always will be, the only mare for me.

I remember one time where the three of us were going to take them to the hearts and hooves dance, and each of us was supposed to buy a flower for our date to pin on thier dresses.  The boys being the boys, Teddy had gone and pulled a flower out of his mom's garden, and Ace gave Melody a rose- that Starlight had given to him in a vase full of water earlier that day. As I pinned Bight Eye’s corsage on her dress,  I witnessed the other two colts being chewed out by their dates. Predicting that something like this would happen, I quietly slipped them two other flowers I had bought from the greenhouse. Just another example of me pulling my  two best friend's flanks out of the fire... again.

Yeeeaaahhh... good old Lancer is usually the one to keep the peace between the genders. Lancer the peacemaker, always giving his two friends ideas to apologize for their stupid schemes and screw-ups. Lancer, traitor to his gender for siding with the love of his life and her silly friends. Lancer the gentleman, for standing up to his two idiot friends for the fairer sex. I've been called so many things and played so many roles and stood on so many sides of arguments that I'm not even sure where I stand on things anymore. But hey, as long as I'm asking other people happy being the sensible one, I'm doing the sensible thing, right?

Oh dear, I can hear the girls outside screaming at Teddy again. I'm guessing he went through with his plan to steal those pies they had worked so hard making for the school bake sale. I'd better go defuse this situation before this thing gets really out of hoof. But then again, this has always been my role as the peacemaker. And so, I must march ever onward... and right now, go stop Patch from ripping Teddy's head off with her bare hooves. Thank you for listening to my long tirade, friend, and I hope we get the chance to converse again!

Sugary Sweet Stuff

Sugary Sweet Stuff

Oh! Um, hello... I really hope I'm not bothering you here. Paradise said I should speak my mind here, but I understand if I'm just annoying you. I'm sorry, I'll just let myself out, just pretend I was never here. Oh dear, why can't I ever do anything right?  I bet my twinkle eyes aren't even in straight- ohhh, why am I so ugly all the time? I'm sorry if I'm being annoying, I'm really trying to do better. Here, I'll just go now, sorry to have bothered you.

Wait, you actually want me to stay here and talk? Oh dear, I'm still so nervous. I'm sorry I'm so nervous talking here. My name's Sweet Stuff, and I'm a blue earth pony with jewel eyes and a candy cutie mark. Oh dear, you can already see that, can't you? Why am I so silly around other ponies. Anyway, I'm head of the Dream Castle kitchens in the evenings, baking sweet treats for all the ponies who live here. I so love making sugary candies and cookies for all my friends.

I had a pretty ordinary childhood, sad to say- nothing fun or exciting like Fizzy or Wind Whistler. Daddy was a soldier in the army and a baseball player for Dream Valley, and mama was a baker in the royal kitchens. They were always so kind to me when I was little; mommy making me yummy cakes and pastries, and daddy picking me up a new dolly with exotic outfits in every foreign land he visited. They taught me it was important to be nice to everyone, and I've always tried to live up to that, no matter how mean or pushy the ponies or people around me can get.

I guess that paid off in my teen filly years... no one ever picked on or bothered me. I kind of made friends with the other fillies at the castle, who liked making yummy treats like I did- Gingerbread and Cupcake. The three of us always had a tray of yummy rice krispies treats ready when the football team was done with a game, or for the younger elementary school classes after their lessons were done. We always so loved making those around us laugh and smile!

I'm always whispering when I talk, and I never ever raise my voice unless I am pushed  to the breaking point. I don't like being mad at anyone or anything, and I quickly forgive anyone whose done something bad to me- I mean, what's the point in being angry, and yelling, and fighting, when all it does is make everyone miserable? Life's too short to be unhappy for long, and I'd rather play a game, or do another ponies's mane, or play with dollies, or have girl talk at a sleepover with friends than pick fights all the time.

Friendship and fun are what being a pony is all about, but I don't think many ponies get that any more. Surprise likes playing her means pranks all the time, like when she slipped too much yeast into the batter for the cake I was baking, and made it explode in my face when I pulled it out of the oven. Or like with Truly and her nasty mouth, like when I made her a whole plate of Bon Bons and took them to her room as a surprise treat. She spent a whole hour yelling at me about 'spoiling her diet', and she used words that would make Salty the sailor blush with shame!

Why do other ponies have to be so mean? My mama said mares and fillies should be kind, gentle, and sweet to other ponies- with pretty make up and ribbons, of course- not these arguing, angry meanies who are always fighting with me and each other. I mean yeah, I'll stand up and get mad if some bad guy threatens the herd. But why tear each other apart over silly little pointless things? I'll never understand all of this pointless bickering.

I'm sorry about sounding so negative, maybe I could tell you about something nicer? Oh! Last week all  us girly ponies in the castle went over to a slumber party at Wind Whistler’s apartment- Chief had taken their daughter Moondream to Luna Park in bright valley for a few days, you see- and we all brought something yummy to eat, and had a big party! Bow Tie did all of our manes up in ribbons and curls, while Fizzy braided our tails!

We were played a game of truth or dare, where Twilight admitted Tornado was the only guy she had ever kissed, or- you know, the stuff that makes me blush- with. Then Heart Throb broke out her extensive doll collection, and we all sat around in a circle, combing their manes and trading tips on how to clean and restore pony dolls. Then I made us some s’mores, and Paradise told ghost stories!

Unfortunately, those mean tomboy ponies came in, and decided to spoil all the fun! Applejack and Firefly fed a long hose down through the roof while we were all having a pillow fight, and Gusty used her magic to turn on the water and let us all have it! Our whole lovely evening, along with our pretty makeovers and dolls we had worked on, were all washed away in a torrent of water the Tomboys had unleashed upon us as a cruel prank. We could hear Cherries Jubilee and Magic Star's laughter from the roof, thinking they had gotten the better of the frilly fillies and their sissy stuff.

But my fellow ladylike didn't take this disgrace hooves down, oh no! Fizzy trapped those un-girly ruffians in a series of bubbles, and floated them down into the room with us. Then, Glory and Posey pulled out the lipstick, dresses, and mascara, and it was MAKEOVER TIME! It was so funny seeing Whizzer and Shady covered in all that makeup, and the great Firefly, all dolled up in a frilly evening gown! They all went galloping away in embarrassment, while we all collapsed to the floor in laughter. That was so much fun!

I wish more ponies knew how to have fun like that, instead of arguing and bickering all the time.  I wish everyone could see that good times and friendship are the real magic, and- oh dear, look at the time! I'm so sorry I kept you some long, with my dumb chattering! Please forgive my silliness, but I need to be on my way now! Let yourself out of my apartment when you're done- oh, and feel free to take any of the cookies I made in the fridge home with you- don't worry, they're all low fat! Anyway, I'll see you around the castle sometime, if you ever decide to visit again! Bye!

Love is a many splendid thing, dahling....

Love is a many splendid thing, dahling....

Wow, I just cannot believe all of this amazing connections! Who would think that Gusty would have such an attraction to Quarterback, or Fizzy would get the hots for Salty? Sometimes I feel ashamed knowing these ponies are so totally gone on each other before anyone else does, but that makes it all part of the fun when ah...

Oh! Pardon me! Introductions are in order first, darling! My name is Heart Throb, Dream Valley's own pink mare with a pink mane and pink hearts cutie mark. I'm the pony who's all about love around here, and being the castle's resident matchmaker is my special talent- one I have carried out with unserving ability ever since ah was a little filly.  It's my destiny to bring all of the star-crossed lovers of ponydom together, and it makes me so happy to help those lonely mares and stallions get together with  the one who is destined to be thier very special someone. I've brought togethah some o' Dream Valley's most romantic couples, ahnd ahm the number one Pegasus evreh pony comes to when they are lonely, ahnd they need halp findin the pony o' thier dreams!

Y'all may not know this, but every mare who's ever born has an invisble pink thread tied to their hoof. That thread leads away from that pony, and can go for as short as the next room over, to all the ay arounbd the world. For on the other end of this thread is the stallion who is destined to be the mare's true love, with whom he will marry, have children, and be happy. Ya see sugar, the horsemaster creates a thread between every pair of ponies of the opposite sex on this planet, and only I  can see these threads of those who are destined to lifebond. So I do my best to bring them together, so that everyone can find the happiness in love they so deserve. Ah do try to halp them, rally I do!

It's always been a gift of mine, ya see... evah since ah was a little filly in Mustangia. Aunty Fancy Flower said I had inherited 'the gift' from mah grandma, an mah sistah Truly was actually scared I was gonna put a 'love hex' on her, since she didn't understand mah special talent an' all. Oh, ah was really good at fixin' up the lonely mares an' stallions at the annual  summer picnic every year, and all the ponies in town came to me fo' love advice. Oh, I just loved love back then, keeping a valentine collection reading those ponyquin romance novels. Nothin sets mah heart aflitter like the thought of a young mare an'  stallion in love! So when ah got heyah ta Dream Castle, ah took ta helpin these lovelorn ponies like a fly takes ta molasses!

Let's see now... oh, there's the thread between Wind Whistler and Chief, obviously. And over there is the twine connecting Bianco and Moondancer. Knowing of my strange power, most ponies would simply accept any significant other I fixed them up with as an obvious given, and never go through the fun an excitement of getting to know a new pony as you courted them. So I usually try to be sneaky and subtle, manipulating the involved pair into spending time with each other. Over time, things just seem to click as they talk, and I have had a 100% sucsess record on all of my matchmaking endavours, dahling!

But it's not always easy to bring them together, let me tell y'all! I ususally play the part of a romantic ditz to catch them off guard, then slowly start dropping hints- a love note here, a valentine there- for the two of them. Though sneaky tricks and shadowy stunts, I get the two to spend more and more time together, until one day they suddenly realize about each other what I knew all along. I can't tell you how much fun it was to work my magic on disgruntled ponies like my sister Truly, and it was a blast helping even her Majesty the  queen find the pony whom her heart has always belonged to!

But... this job isn't always so fun and exciting. There are some ponies who just can't get a clue when I drop them the little hints and clues, and go on to cause both thmeselves and thier future partner a great deal of grief before finally coming to there senses and 'disocvering' thier love for said pony. And there are those few ponies whose threads lead out an away from Dream Castle, like Twilight's did- those are sometimes the heardest ones to fufil the dreams of. And reading another species's love threads? Foget it! I've never been able to get a reading on ethier Spike or Megan. I even wonder if humans or dragons have lifelong soulmates, considering unlike ponies they can take multiple partners- and also unlike ponies they can even take partners not of the oppsite gender! *Sigh* other species can be so confusing sometimes.

But the worst is the one pony whose thread line I cannot read... my own. I can't even see my thread, let alone even possibly READ it. I don't even know if B'zekre even made a very special someone out there for me! So I have to be content looking at my valentine collection, and reading cheesy romance novels until my knight without his own visible soul thread tied to his hoof shows up. Until them, I guess I'll just have to be content with the way things are right now! You cannot imagine how hard it is to be a pony of love, yet y'all caint expriance  the thrill of the emotion yahself.

Bein' the pony of love an' all, ah often wondah if this is haow it was fo' Princess Cadence back in her day. She was equestria's old pony o' love, ahnd it was yeahs before she found her knight in Shining Armah... literaly. Thait mare is mah idol- she started as a pegasus too, ya'll know, before becomin an alicorn! Ah don't know if  she is able to spot the love lines like I cain, but she coan spread love with her magic- somethin far beyond mah talents!  Ah hope I cain get ta Misty Mountian someday, ahnd maybe ask the grand 'ol lady fo' some advice on haow ta spread love bettah.

Well, that's all I have ta say for now! I need to go help Cheerilee on her date with Wigwam. Come look me up if yo  evah in Dream Castle, and y'all have a love problem of your own, I'd be happy to help! Oh, and let me know if you know of anyone nice who isn't attached, okay? Hope ta see y'all ahgain, ahnd don't be a stranger, ya heyah?

Oh, ahnd since as a southerner y'all expect me ta say it... South Mustangia shall rise aghain! Rally it will!

Heart Throb

Sky Rocket's red glare

Sky Rocket's red glare

Holiday article by Paradise oaisis

BOOM! BOOM! B-B-BOOM BOOM BOOM!

It's once again the time of the midsummer festival here at Dream Castle, and every pony is in a joyus mood for the occasion. Foals are playing with sparklers, mares are packing picnics, and families are enjoying yummy meals out on the castle's lawn. This festival is to celebrate no only the warmpth of summer and it's beauty, by also is a day to remeber all of the great heroes and champions who fought in defense of Ponyland's ideals and freedoms... even if those heroes came from a time before Ponyland existed. Hot dogs and hamburgers are enjoyed by all, as the flag of Dream Valley waves proudly on the castle turret high above our heads. The day of the festival is an event truly to be experienced.

But as dusk comes on, and the afternoon sky gives way to a twinkling blanket of stars, it is the thundering boom of fireworks that fill the heavens above. Fiery explosions of green, blue, yellow and red. They are a wonderous sight to see... brilliant flowers that light of the night sky, brining a few moments of exictement and joy before they fizzle out and fade away. And it is the purple mare with the red, yellow, and pink mane standing here beside me on the castle ramparts, who makes this wonderful psectacle all possible.

"I just love making the ponies of Dream Valley's faces light up with my fireworks!" Sky Rocket beamed, looking up at her hoofwork in the evening sky over our heads. "I work so hard putting the right combinations of colors together to make it really razzle dazzle em'!"

And boy, does she know how to razzle dazzle them! This earth pony mare has more then earned that red firework cutie mark on her flank, having put on shows that draw thousands of visitors from even as far away as Maretonia. To her, each rocket is like a finely crafted work of art. She carefully places the powder and fuse in each mortar shell, plans out the positioning and timing of the rockets firing with the aid of our castle event planner, Glory, and then creates the most beautiful symphony of light in the sky iver the castle that any pony has ever seen. But this artwork is not something that she just knew how to do one day, as it took years of self teaching and practice.

"My parents thought I might have been a pyromaniac when I was little, the way I was fascinated by fires and explosions." The mare explained with a sigh. "The neighhhh-bors all thought I should be kept far, far away from matches- I actually think they were all slightly scared of my, I'm sad to say ."

Sky Rocket has been playing with gunpowder since an early age, scaring her mother when she nearly blew the wall out of thier apartment, making Dream Castle's western wall explode outward in a show of color and light. She continued to love to make things go boom as she was growing up, and nearly melted down her elementry school classroom showing off her 'explosive' science project.

"Who know a little fake volcano could make such a big kaboom?" She told me sheepishly. "That little doozy got me detention for a month!"

That's not to say she hasn't continued to make her share of mistakes, however. When she was nineteen, Miss Rocket blew her own eyes out with a prematurely ignited bottle rocket. She now has a set of glittering gemstones, in place of her once beautiful eyes. They serve as a very visual warning, to those ponies who would play with those dangerous explosives untrained. Such carelessness has forever marred her good looks, and left her with  a constant reminder of the dangers of not respecting the power of something as dangerous as these colorful explosives.

"Ponies need to really really careful with fireworks." Sky Rocket warned, reflecting sadly on her mistake all those years ago. "It makes me sad when something so bight and colorful and loud is used to hurt an innocent pony."

As the fireworks conttinue to explode overhead, I can barely make out what the excited mare is saying. So I return my attntion to the show in the sky above. Shells exploded in the shapes of famous ponies- Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Princesses Celestia and Luna. Larger than life pony heroes who gave thier all, so that future generations of ponies could live and graze free. We remeber them and the heroism of the golden age- from the escape of Nightmare Moon, to the fires and destuction of the Grogar Wars- I can think of no more fitting tribute to thier glory than the explosions overhead.

Then, it comes. A great, fiery chain of explosions and noise filled the sky overhead, filling our ears with a cahcophany of lightning and thunder. Words cannot describe the looks of amazement and wonder in the eyes of the little fillies and colt watching the diplays with thier parents. Sky Rocket sees these expressions, and thier is no greater reward for the mare who put so much effort and care into her craft. Looking back towards me with tears of joy in her blurry eyes, she delivered one final message for me to pass on to all of you.

"Tell your readers that I hope they had a happy summer festival." The mare told me solemnly, "Tell them I hope they spend a lot of time with thier families, and eat a lot of good food, and remember what this day really means."

And that is my hope, as well... I hope you all have a wonderful day on this midsummer festival... and that you always remeber to never forget.

Fluttershy Shutterfly

Fluttershy Shutterfly

Hello, um, uhhhhh….. It’s so nice to meet you. My name’s F-Fluttershy, and I-I’m from Ponyville. W-what? Oh no no, not that Fluttershy, she was my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandma! I-I’m not very good with animals, though I do think they are awfully cute and adorable! Whenever I see a an fluffy little kitty or  adorable little puppy, I just cant help but take a picture of it!

Yeah, if you haven’t guessed it yet, taking pictures is my special talent. I love to take my camera out, and snap photos of everyone and everything around me. Ponies, pets, buildings, events… I capture instant glimpses of the world around me on film, and share my art with everyone by hanging my work in my galley. I’ve done Wysteria’s coronation, Toola Roola’s wedding, and Kimono’s paper lantern festival.  Razaroo always has me on tap to take photos for her birthday book, and Pinkie Pie has a wall reserved in her house for every holiday photo I’ve snapped.

And what comes after I snap the pictures… for me, nothing beats the fun of working in a dark room, watching your snapshots slowly become visible as you hold it under the liquid in your hooves. I love the smell of a new roll of film, between when you take it out of the package, and stick it into your camera. And there’s always a smile when I bring my lens into focus during a special event. Other ponies just love it when I put the world around me on film! I swear, not even the great Photo Finish herself, even with all her 'dam magics', could've matched my  amazing skill as a shutterbug!

At least, that's what Spike the Dragon tells me. I don't even know who this 'Photo Finish' lady is. I really don't think I'm that good of a photographer myself at all, I just know I really like taking pictures. But if all my friends say I'm really good at my hobby, I'm more than happy to share my favorite pastime with them. Everyone should enjoy photography, wither it's the photographer taking the picture, or the viewer viewing it!

But… there are times when being a photo buff aren’t so much fun for me. In my obsession to photograph everything, I’ve taken pictures of ponies when they didn’t want to be pictured. Once I snapped a photo of Rainbow Dash and her boyfriend Denim Blue, when they were enjoying some time alone. They weren’t to happy about that, and Rainbow told me very loudly that she didn’t want to see me doing that again. The same thing happened with Skywishes and her stallion lover Silver Glow, and also with Fiesta Flair and her husband Frisco. I seemed to get into sooo much trouble, even when I really don't mean to!

"Fluttershy, Darling, could you please point that camera somewhere else?!"

"Fluttershy, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to stop bringing that camera of yours to Butterfly island. You took that photograph at a most inopportune time!"

"Seniorita Fluttershy, was are you doing!? Taking pictures of us like dat is muy rude!"

Sigh... I never meant to cause trouble, I just thought they were great shots! And now I can't even take pictures on Butterfly island anymore- that's one of my favorite spots for wildlife! Butterflies are my favorite animal to photograph- maybe that's why I have one as my cutie mark , hee hee. But I don't get why Queen Sky Wishes says I have a problem with taking too many pictures. I mean sure, it was a little embarrassing taking that photo of Thistle Whistle while she was going to the bathroom behind that bush, but that doesn't mean I have a problem... do I?

At least there are some ponies who appreciate me, like Minty! She currently has me photographing and cataloging her sock collection, and loves every picture I take. My own boyfriend, Daybreak- he's the blue stallion with the red, blue, and green mane who shares my cutie mark- he's a photographer too, though he takes pictures mostly in the early morning. We both love snapping photos in the early morning light together. And my little assistant, Lady Slipper... she's a breezie who can gets in and takes photos in places nobody else can. I don't know what I'd do without these gals (and guy, hee hee), as the rest of my life seems like such a mess sometimes.

Also, I have another problem. See, if you look at all my pictures, you'll notice a certain pink pony mare with a yellow, pink and purple mane missing- see, that pony is me. It is totally ironic that the one pony who just can't stop taking pictures... is too shy to get her own picture taken. Pinkie Pie and all of the others have tried to encourage me on this, but I just can't force myself to stand in front of the lens of my camera, or anybody else's. I know, it's the most pathetic thing you've ever heard, right? The original Fluttershy is probably sitting up in the Friendship gardens right now, ashamed that her earth pony granddaughter is such a wimp. She could stare down even the scariest and meanest dragons, and monsters... and I can't even stare into the lens of a camera without chickening out.

Oh dear, I need to stop being so depressed about everything. Oh, it's a nice sunny day! Maybe I should go fly kites with Skywishes- no, wait, she's still mad at me for photographing her dragon kite before she could reveal it, and spoiling the surprise.  Hey, what about Starsong? No, she's still mad about that picture of her singing in the shower. Ohhh, I got it! I'll go see a movie with my best friend, Daisyjo! I'd better take my camera along, though. You never know when a goon spoiler scene might pop up in a flick! Anyway, talk to you later, bye!

The Way of the Rainbow

The Way of the Rainbow

Nightfall... the halls of the great Canterlot Castle stand silent, save for the soft hoofalls of myself and my sisters. The torchlight flickers off the walls as our robed forms trot by,  a swinging brazier filled with incense held aloft by the Pegasus at the front of our group.  Our slow trot punctuated by the rhythmic chanting our hymns in the old tongue of Equestria, we slowly pass the chambers that were once the rooms of Celestia and Luna. As we trot down the stairs towards what was once the throne room, the blue unicorn halts our prayers by whispering;

"Sisters, the time for our evening prayers has come."  Moonstone mutters, to which we all nod our heads in agreement. "Let us make our way to the shrine of our goddess, at once."

It should be of no surprise that we dwell in this place in this frightful age, seeing as how the old palace is now the Great Rainbow monastery, our home. Our many acolytes dwell the various rooms of the castle, and visitors and pilgrims seeking our guidance are here, as well.  The Princess ponies gifted this place to our order, following Ponyland's recovery the castle from our race's enemies. And it is only fitting that former abode of the alicorn sisters become our holiest temple- symbolizing the triumph of the way of the horsemaster over Alicornism and it's ugly heathen idols.

The six of us enter the old throne room, and pulled our cloaks back. And out from beneath these hoods fall our long, flowing, rainbow colored manes... moving seas of vibrant colors that move with a life all their own. It is a symbol of our enlightenment, the connection we have made with the divine through years of meditation and prayer. Standing in a line behind Starshine, the white Pegasus who is our leader, kneels before the great icon of B'zekre. We all follow suit, and soon our voices rise in adoration for the creator of all of Ponykind;

Great and blessed pony who is above all

let not our humble herd falter and fall.

Our gracious creator, please hear our call

let all of your children, before you stand tall

Our prayers, pleas and petitions echo through the chamber, reaching the ears of the the goddess who lies outside the world material. We do not pray or serve a flesh and blood pony, but the light of eternal mind and the spirit. B'zekre is beyond the corruption of the flesh, or the ultimate calamity of death. It is through faith in her, and love of your fellow pony- not friendship, but love of your fellow pony- that with allow each of us to triumph over death, and  enter the paradise of the Friendship gardens ourselves. We Rainbow ponies exist to show the unenlightened ponies along the path, and to be their light in the uncertain darkness.

Suddenly Parasol, our pink eath pony sister, pulled her head up from her prayers, her ears perking up. "Sisters, we are not alone here! Another presence has arrived amongst us!"

We all stop our prayers, and we too soon feel the power that emanates from a corner of the room, trying to conceal itself. But we are too in tune with the world around us to be blind to such power in our midst, and it isn't long before we call our visitor out.

"We know you are here, great one."  Sunlight, our blue earth mare called out to our esteemed visitor. "Come forth, and make our presence known."

There was no movement at first, but then our legendary visitor emerged from the shadows. Beautiful feathery wings, and enchanted horn... there was no doubt it was an alicorn who stood before us. Few of these wondrous creatures existed in this world, and it is rare of humble mares such as ourselves to be in the presence of such a powerful being. She looks about the room, gazing at the likeness of the horsemaster B'zekre sitting in place of the throne of Princess Celestia.

"Greetings, sisters of the Rainbow Monks." The alicorn princess greeted us. "You've done a remarkable job of caring for this place, though I don't exactly agree with some of your changes."

"Greetings, exalted one." Moonstone greeted our visitor, bowing and offering all the proper gestures of respect. "What brings a pony of your grace and stature to our humble monastery?"

"Always quick to get to the point, aren't you rainbow monks" She replied, a hint of annoyance in her voice. "But since you wish to dispense with the pleasantries, I wish to acquire a small artifact of great importance from your monastery- a mere trinket, that the ponies of my kingdom have more need of than the confederacy does."

"Ahhh, but what could our humble order possibly have that would be of interest to you?" Parasol added, gesturing down the all to our monastery’s treasury. "We have many artifacts from the days of old here. If there is something you need..."

"The Rainbow of Light." The alicorn replied bluntly, turning to face us. "I know Queen Majesty has placed the rainbow here for safekeeping, and my subjects and I have more need of it than a confederacy already protected by the Elements of Harmony, the golden crown, and the Starlight Lantern."

"But.. your subjects already have you to protect them, noble princess."  Moonstone countered. "Surely a tiny trinket such as the rainbow would be of no use to your bountiful lands!"

"I'm afraid not, there are many threats that stand before my kingdom." The alicorn replied, narrowing her eyes. "And I'm also afraid I'm not leaving here without the rainbow."

"If you wish to threaten us,  you fill find that despite being ponies of peace, we are not without the ability to defend ourselves." Parasol declared, as all of our eyes began to glow with the rainbow magic that flowed through our manes. "If it is a fight you want for the rainbow of light, then it is a fight you shall have, relic!"

"Oh, there's no need to fight, rainbow ponies... the item which I seek has already been recovered while we have been speaking." The alicorn replied smugly, teleporting away as her voice faded out. "You monks aren't very good at dealing with distractions."

As my sisters stood there confused at the Princesses’ words, I turned away from them in shame. They would soon go to the vault to find the rainbow locket gone, taken back to the alicorn princess's kingdom for her own use. They will not realize that a traitor stands among their ranks, and that the Confederacy will soon have an ancient enemy far more dangerous than Tirek, or Grogar, or any of the other foes of Ponykind combined. It will be pony against pony in this final, terrible war to come. And I fear the Confederacy may finally be destroyed by a selfish purple mare who cannot accept that these lands have moved on without her.

Overcome by the horror of my actions, I turn to flee from my dear sisters. I cannot face those whom I had betrayed.

"Windy, wait!" Parasol called out, confused at my flight. "Were are you going?"

As I gallop away from the others, I feel my rainbow main slowly becoming normal again, and my unicorn magic slowly taking hold again as the rainbow powers leave me. Guilt washes over me for betraying my sisters, an action forced upon me by the alicorn, whom has my family under her 'protection'. As I flee from the monastery with my tail between my legs, I pray to B'zekre above for forgiveness for my treachery.

The Way of the Rainbow, Part Two

The Way of the Rainbow, Part Two

"Windy, what's wrong? Are you all right?" A voice calls out to me from the darkness, pulling my mind back to reality from my dream-like state. "Sister Windy, please snap out of it!"

My eyes snap open in shock, and I find myself sitting before my sisters Moonstone and Parasol, deep within the monastery’s meditation chambers. There was never an alicorn here before us, and I have thankfully not betrayed my sisters. Looking around at my two fellow rainbow ponies, panic quickly filled my heart and mind.

"My sisters, it is truly terrible~" I cried out in a panic, hopping to my feet. "I had a horrible vision of the future, though I am not fully certain what it means!"

Then perhaps you should tell us of this vision that troubles you so, so that we may help you ascertain it's meaning." Parasol suggested in her usual calm way. "Let your sisters unburden the worries of your heart and mind, so that you may be at ease once more."

And so I tell them of the purple alicorn, and her quest to take the rainbow of light, as well as my betrayal of my sisters and everything I believe in. Parasol and Moonstone look at each other, nodding as the same thoughts crossed both of their minds.

"You have little to fear, sister. We do not possess the Rainbow of light here, nor is there any purple alicorn princess in this world." Parasol assured me, placing a comforting hoof on my shoulder. "Your disturbing visions have not yet come to pass, so let your mind not be troubled."

"But these visions may have a deeper meaning, sister. And that's something we must meditate on." Moonstone agreed, looking back at me with concern. "Perhaps you have doubts about yourself, and fear your doubts will lead you to betray us, or let us down in some way?"

"And this alicorn... perhaps she represents a foe you believe is before us, yet you cannot directly identify yet?"

"Hm, perhaps you are correct, my sisters." I reply with a sigh, considering their words. "But I do indeed wonder if this might not be a more literal vision, than the usual symbolic ones we receive on a regular basis."

"You mean, that perhaps your mysterious alicorn is an actual adversary that may come to threaten us?" Moonstone replied, "And that one of Dream Valley's greatest weapons may be under threat by this unknown opponent?"

"I believe that's hat B'zekre might be trying to tell us." I reply with uncertainty. "I only wish she would reveal to us from where this threat was coming, so that we could better prepare for this dangers ahead."

"We all wish the goddess would tell us exactly what she means, sister... it would certainly make all of our jobs easier." "But perhaps you are right sister, I will send word to Queen Majesty to be on guard, though I do wonder how such a thing as an unaccounted for alicorn could still be out there. Especially without our knowing about it."

"There is much in this world we are not aware of, sister. Much more than we rainbow monks would care to admit." Parasol pointed out. "It is our order's greatest weakness that we know and see so much, that our own arrogance at times causes us to see and know so little."

And so we depart from the meditation chambers to go and do that which we rainbow ponies are always best at- praying. We eight of the flowing manes- along with our hundreds of acolytes- serve all of Ponyland's spiritual needs. We are here to provide comfort to horsemasterists when they need it, and to give warnings and aid when our goddess calls upon us to.. We have replaced the alicorns as mediators between the world of mortals and the world of the spirit, and I feel right now B'zekre is trying to warn us of something most dire.

As we rejoin our other sisters in the great shrine, we kneel before th altar and close our eyes. The rainbow power washes over us as we chant our prayers to the goddess, and her peace washes over me. The answer to these puzzling and troubling matters will come to us in time, when the great will of the horsemaster deems it to be so.

But oh, how could any alicorn want to cause Ponyland any kind of harm? They are the holy and living symbols of B'zekre's power made flesh, the embodiment of three types of pony manifest in one form, just as the horsemaster herself is the mystical composition of a trinity of ponies in one. How could one of her divine handmaidens, the alicorns, possibly act against the good of pony kind? I try to push these matters from my mind, and let the grace of our blessed mistress wash over me through the myriad colors of the rainbow. And through the strength of my faith and prayer, Windy the rainbow unicorn's troubled heart is finally at peace.

The Lone Star Pony

The Lone Star Pony

High noon ovah the badlands, an' only two ponies trot out in the scrochin' heat of th' day. The dry desert wind whips at mah long coat, blowin' sand in mah face so's ah have ta keep mah ten gallon hat down ta stop it from gettin' in mah eyes.  The spurs on mah hoofboots jangle as ah trot, makin' it the only sound ovah the unforgivin wind. A vultrue circles ovahead as we go along,  and ah turn ta the injun pony beside me, tah tell him the bad news.

"Fraid' this heats' gonna be the end of us, Kemosabe." Ah inform him, a grim look on my face. "As the buffalo of yer tribe would say, we bein' in heap big trouble out heyah."

"For the last time, Tex, none of the memebers of my tribe talk like that!" Mah injin companion replies, speakin them fancy wards ah cain't even understand. "And the weather's not even close to being harsh out here, we just left the trading post ten minutes ago!"

Pardin' fer startin mah story in the middle folks, better introduce mahself first. Name's Tex, cowpony o' Dream Valley, and the most rootinest tootinest buckaroo in all o' Ponyland! There ain't no stallion who can shoot faster, gallop farther, or run a cattle drive all the way from the southern boundaries o' the confederacy, all the way  across the border inta New Equestria. Mah good injun friend here is Wigwam, an orange stallion with a couple a' teepees on his flank, an' a whole headress full o' feathers coverin' his mane.

Mah kemosabe an' ah are on our way back 'cross the badlands home afttah an arduous journey, an' ah just know there's a heap load a trouble watin' fer us out in these heayah wild lands. But this yellow stallion with the pink main ain't afraid of any ornery varmits, an ah'm ready ta put a bullet in thier flanks at a moments notice.

"Keep close ta me, Kemosabe." Ah tell him, mah front hoof inchin' around the gun holster at mah waist. "Ah reckin there be bandits in these here hills."

"Blast it Tex, will you please stop talking like that!" Wigwam grumbles, rolling his eyes. "I really wish Surprise wouldn't let you watch those stupid western movies!"

Ah cain only reckon thait mah savage companion must be talkin about mah murky past, with some o' the words ah cain make out of his wierd lingo. Mah life was once as borin' as evereh other pony in Dream Valley, Workin the fields an' soldierin' laike all the other stallions, and no sense of who I was or what ah was supposed ta do with may life. Jest another pointless pony goin about pointless work around Dream Castle. Ah didn't even have mah cutie mark as a a-dult, how embarrsin, ahm ah raight?

But then, ah discovered them cowboy movies Megan brought with her from the human world, an' they changed mah life. Roy Rogers, Gene Autry, the Duke... these human fellers knew how ta live hard and rough on the open range, and played by thier own rules. Thait's the kind o' laife ah wanted ta live, and so I remade mahself into a cowboy. Not ah cowpony, like Applejack 'ol kin in Appleoosa, but a real human cowboy, with all the rough an tumble trimmings. Ah changed mah name ta Tex, after the great land of the cowboys,  an learned my self ta talk the talk an' how ta shoot, just laike them cowboys do in the movies.

"Wait, Tex... do you hear that?" Mah injun' friend stopped me with a raised hoof. "I think we have company."

Mah ears twitched, an' ah heard the sounds o' three ponies- outlaws, from th' way theyah sulkin around, instead o' talkin' to us- cralin around the rocks behaind us. They were porbably a couple a varmits from Dodge Junction, ah reckon, who followed us back to Ponyland thinkin' we were carryin' valuables o' some sort. Mah companion ahnd ah tensed ourselves, readyin fer the fight we knew was comin'.

Then... it happened.

The three ruffians sprung out from behaind the rocks, holdin thar weapons up in thier hooves. Like lightnin' ah whipped the Colt 45 outta it's holster and blasted the first one before he even haid time ta twitch. Wigwam dropped the second one laike a bad habit- his tomahawk flyin throgh th' air, and buryin' intself in the ornery critter's skull. The laist one lunged directly at me. only ta come face ta barrel with the winchester ah pulled otta mah coat.

"Go ahead, ya ornery sidewinder." Ah declared, clicking the hammer on the shotgun ah held at the outlaw's head. "Make mah day!"

Thait's mah special talent, ya see... these guns earned me mah cactus cutie mark. Ah'm the best shot in all o' Dream Valley- which isn't sayin much, seein as haow me an' Barncle are the only ponies who carry firarms. Megan brought these two guns from her world for me as gifts, and the castle's blacksmith modified the guns fer mah hooves and supplies me with bullets. Ah cain see the bullet an' mah target movin' in slow motion, makin it easy ta shoot down any taget no matter how fast it's movin. Yep, good ole Tex cain shoot down a chargin minotaur at two miles, and there ain't no ornery outlaw who's gettin the drop on me!

"Get these other two rattlesnakes cleaned up here, kemosabe." Ah tell mah partner with a smile. "Ahm takin this lowlife back ta Dream Castle dungeon, then ah got ah certain mare named Surprise a 'watin fer me!"

"For the last time, don't call me kemosabe!" Mah comapinion yells in his war cry, as ah ride off into the sunset. "I don't even know what that MEANS!"

Dominate

Dominate

Competition, it's what daddy says makes the world go round. Survival of the fittest is how my daddy, my grandpa, and My great grandpa controlled the economy of Ponyville. It's what makes up the most important ponies in this town- well, after Princess Twilight, of course- and lets us run things the way they should be. Competition roots out the strong from the weak,  and let Silver Spoon and I rise above the ratty competition in this backward, one-princess town.

Some ponies say I'm mean, some call me a bully. I say let them. They're all just jealous that they are not strong enough to compete with me, they can't stand up to my 'mean' comments, when all I'm doing is telling them the truth.  Mommy couldn't handle the truth when daddy told her, when she whined daddy was being too 'heartless' to his customers who owed him money.  So when he had the bank foreclose on the old couple who lived next to our house so he could get the land to expand his store, mommy up and left us. I say let her, she's not strong enough to be a part of our family.

Those little brats I used to know at school, the cutie mark crusaders... they were the perfect example of weakness. Three little blank flanks who didn't get their cutie marks until they were almost teens, how could anyone think that trio was worth anything? That stupid Scootaloo still can't even fly! Why did Miss Cheerilee and the other worthless ponies in our school even listen to them?!? They had these stupid ideas about caring and friendship, that stuff stops the strong from exploiting lesser ponies!

I can't believe Miss Cheerilee supported those stupid ideas, being that she was supposed to prepare us for life in the adult world, and sweep away such sentimental nonsense! It's a good thing I paid that unicorn witch to trap Miss Cheerilee in that enchanted book, now she won't be able to spread her weakness to future generations of ponies. I donated the book to a dusty old wing of the Canterlot archives, and by the time anypony finds her in all those dusty stacks, I'll be dust in the ground by then!

I also eliminated daddy when he became too weak- it didn't take to much bribe money to get Filthy Rich shipped off to the old ponies home for senility. Now, I have no competition in my plans to dominate Ponyville. He was still trying to hide his strength behind a veil of weakness by putting on an act, and pretending to be 'nice' in public. I'll make no such mistake in my dealings with these stupid ponies, there should be no reason for the predator to hide his strength from his stupid, gullible prey. Now, there's nothing left to stand in my way from completely controlling this entire town!

Nothing... except that stupid Princess Twilight and her stupid little friends! The princess of friendship... bah! Why would a princess, a position of power, stand for something so weak? There's no way my money could buy her off... but then again, it really doesn't have to. Little miss friendship might be immortal, but her namby-pamby little friends aren't. All I have to do is bide my time until they all die off, keep slowly buying up every acre of Ponyville, and everything will be ready when that alicorn leaves this town out of painful heartbreak. Then, I can turn this whole community into a money making enterprise, and finally put these miserable and weak ponies to good use!

So I've quietly been making the necessary preparations, eliminating the weaknesses that could stand in my way. No one will be able to trace that poison placed in that cross-eyed mare's muffin when she refused to sell her home to me. And Time Turner's little 'accident' involving his getting buried under a ton of sand from one of his own hourglasses... well, everpony assumes it's just an accident. No one will think anything of it when I quietly acquire his business from the estate. All it takes is a few bits in the right places.

That's the beauty of money, you see... money is the sweet ambrosia of the alicorn gods that makes this world go round. For all their talk of love and friendship, offer any pony enough wealth, and they'll sell out their best friend or betray their mother. Every pony in Equestria is greedy at heart, and every Equestrian equine has their price. They can rant and rave about special talents and harmony all they like, but every one of these little hypocrites, from the now elderly CMC to the royal sisters themselves, secretly crave both wealth and the power it brings. Those alicorn fools just won't admit it to themselves.

At least I'm honest about my lust for gold, I even wear this truth on the diamond tiara that adorns my head. My family has always known how to part an equine and his wealth, and make him or her think they've gotten some kind of happiness out of the money they've spent. Let other ponies live in their self-delusion that there actually is things such as compassion and friendship, I'll simply sit back and rake in the profits from their stupidity.

Ponies like myself are the ones truly in control of this world, the ponies who dominate because we see the true nature of this world. And as long as other mares and stallion continue to wear blinders in regards to the way the world really works- well, that simply means more foolish saps for mares like me to drain dry of their bits, then!  After all, it is simply natural for the strong to out-compete the weak, for  lesser ponies to be ground into the dirt by their betters. To even consider I was wrong would be a sign of weakness on my part!

Dance the Dance, Part one

Dance the Dance, part one

"All right, girls! Kick those hooves high, and show them what you're made of!"

"Awww come on, Twinkle Twirl! We've been over this routine, like, fifteen times now!"

"Yeah, why can't we just go over to Cotton Candy's cafe, and getting something to eat?"

Good Grief, these mares are so difficult sometimes, teaching them the moves to my newest dance routine is taking forever! Bowtie keeps tripping over her own hooves, and Blossomforth keeps bumping into the other mares. Oh, how can I have a dance routine ready for the Spring Festival, when these ponies can't work together like a single unit!

And yet, how can I blame them  for being like that? I've always taught my dancing students to be individuals. Each one of them is an artist, and their own bodies are their paint brush, the  tool whose movements express their own artistic spirit, carried out in the rhythm of their dance moves. Each mare here in My Dance Studio has her own unique way of expressing herself, and no one is exactly like the other in her dancing talents.

"Take a look at this move, Twinkle. I think maybe we should add my new steps to the routine."

Apple Spice is the quieter out of our dance troupe. Her dances feature strong, rigid movements... highlighting her great earth pony strength. She and her cousin Applejack planted that whole apple orchard on Butterfly island by themselves, and that yellow mare with an orange and purple mane is the strongest mare in my dance studio. She's always the grounded one in our performances, making the slow and steady dance steps. Apple does have the courage to speak her mind though, when she has an idea.

"Hey Twinkle, we gotta add more fast moves into the routine! I mean, how are we gonna keep the audience's attention with all these slowwww moves?"

"Yeah Twirl, we gotta add some more spinning and swirling in, just like we were dancing on the air!"

Coconut Cream is our fast dancer, quickly moving up and down in rapid movements like the roller coasters she so loves. I have never seen another mare this energetic and lively, her white coat and rainbow mane are a blur of high kicks and jumps whenever we're on stage. She's such a real ball of fire, the rest of us have trouble keeping up with her! Complimenting her style is her friend Loop De Lah,  who enjoys spinning and twirling moves, always going in circles around  whenever she's on stage.  The blue mare and her friend leave the rest of us in the dust.

"Hmmmm, Twinkle... maybe we could include some moves for the stallions. You know... a little sauce in our hoof steps to keep em' interested?"

When it comes to sultry, the beautiful Desert Rose puts the rest of us to shame. Her dancing is the rhythmic swaying of her hips to the beat, the swishing tail and movement of her flank that sends every stallion in Ponyville into a lustful frenzy. Rose's dance, or so the stallions tell me, sings of fertility... of the desert heat and the exotic power of the burning sands from whence this mare claims to have originated. I couldn't say anything About that, as her moves and body don't do a thing for me or any other mares. But we can appreciate the athletic beauty that comes from the rapid passionate moves of her frantic, sweat-covered body.

There are times the rest of us actually envy her.

"All right girls, listen up!" I tell them loudly, making the students of my dance troupe fall in line. "I want us to get this 'Butterfly Dance' down so we can perform it perfectly for Queen Star Catcher's birthday next week! I don't want any mistakes, okay?"

"Yes ma'am!" The all giggled together, as they all got back up on the stage. Desert Rose, Loop De Lah, and Coconut Cream hopped into the three main circular platforms, and I stepped over to the wall to where the stage's electronic controls were.

"Okay, ready?" I called out, as Apple Spice, Bow tie and Blossomforth took their places on the sides of the stage. "Go!"

I flip the switch, the the stage and the three raised platforms start to rotate, as the music starts to play. The ponies on the lower platforms dance on all four hooves, the three on the higher tiers stand upright and begin to twirl, leap, and sway. Even though we all have our own unique styles and movements, all of my students are able to take their individual movements and expressions and combine them to perform a masterpiece! As they comes towards the finale, I guide them through the big finish they always have a problem with.

"Good job, ladies!" I encouraged them, standing  up on my hind legs. "Now, let's bring this thing home!"

Jumping forward, I leap around to demonstrate my finale dance step.

"Chug chug chug! Up Up Up!"

The others all jump forward, mimicking my moves.

"Chug chug chug! Up Up Up- ohhhhhh!"

As usual, Coconut Cream stumbles forward, and knocks all the other mares off the stage.  As they lay there in a pile and giggle, I rub my forehead with my hooves.

"Come on, girls!" I groan, slowly pulling my students out of the pile. "We need to ge this right, to impress the Queen of Butterfly island for-"

"Um, excuse me, Mizz Twirl?" Suddenly, a little white filly trotted into my studio, looking around timidly. "Is diz your dance studio?"

I was surprised by the sight of the child, not because of her rainbow mane, but instead the wings on her back. What was a little Pegasus girl doing here in my dance studio? Did she find her way through the portal under the waterfall and get lost?

"Yes my dear, I'm twinkle Twirl." I reply, trotting over to the newcomer. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"Aloha, Mizz Twirl, mi name iz Honolu-Loo." The little filly told me excitedly, hopping up and down. "An' I came here to join your dance troupe! I wanna be able to perform on stage like the  majorly shaka ponies up there on your stage!"

"Well then, I'd be happy to have you come back on Friday!" I tell her with a beaming smile. "That's when I hold my foal dance classes, and we'd be more than happy to bring a flyer into the group!"

And I really was looking forward to it, imagine getting to create dance routines with AIR dance moves! But that's not what the little filly wanted.

"Oh no, you mizuderstand!" The little filly explained. "I don't need to learn how ta dance, I wanna dance for Starcatcher! I vanna show our queen how much I love her by doing what I love doing! I vanna dance for de queen!"

I shook my head sadly, not sure how to tell the poor little filly the problem with her desire.

"I'm sorry, little one, but we already have our routine worked out, and we're already having trouble putting the routine together as is." I try to explain, the little fillies heads already drooping. "Besides, I don't know if we could work a Pegasus into our dance number."

Oh, I see... I understand, mizz Twinkle Twirl." Honolu-Loo sighed, trotting back out the door. But her ears suddenly perked up again. "Oh! I know what you mean! You want me to prove I can do de dance as good as your troupe!" She opened her wings, and took off into the sky. "Don' worry, Mizz Twirl! I'll show you I'm my worth to dance before Starcatcher, you'll see!"

As she zipped off towards the horizon, I still stood there, to shocked to speak. Poor Hona, I hated that she was getting her hopes up like that, when I know there is no way she could be ready in time. After this was all over, I'd have to have a heart-to-heart talk with that little filly, and make sure she was all right.

"Okay, girls... now that that distraction is out of the way..." I tell my dancers with a sigh, turning back to face the stage. "Let's take this thing from the top!"

And as the mares got back up on the stage, I silently hoped Hona wouldn't go and do something foolish to get into the show....

Dance the Dance, part two- Aloha!

Dance the Dance, part two- Aloha!

Dose mean old mares, not letting me dance before de ali’i of our island, Starcatcher! I too can dance as good as any of dem haole earth ponies! I been dancin' across dee skies over butterfly island me whole life! Dancing is in de blood of de Pegasus ponies! All I have to do is get a swift ale' under me wings, and I can dance de air hula across de skies like de graceful bird! But does that Twinkle Twirl let me dance with de other Ponyville dancers? A'ole!  She say I too little to dance with her troupe! What does dat pa'akiki mare think she know about-

Oh ay, Honaloo Loo, calm yourself down. It don't do no good to mad at de Dance studio troupe ponies, dey honestly don think a littlekeki like me can keep up with dem on stage. Dey don't unnstand I been dancing for as long as I can remember, copying de moves of my makuhine... me mama... when she danced de sacred dance- de hula- on de beach for our annual makahiki festivals. I remeber her standing up on two hooves in a grass skirt, her hips swaying to de traditional kahiko meldoy of our tribe. I stood by, imating her, making sure I got every move right!  All de pegasus stallions on butterfly island said me mama was de most na'au mare on de island, and how lucky my makuakane was to have her for a wife.

The Buttlefly island hula is de most beautiful dance performed by peagsus, wit hips swaying movements on de ground an' in de air. It is a languge all it's own, commnicating in a form mere words cannot explain or express. Only one family on de island can perform dis sacred dance at de festival every year, and it has been my family dat has carried out dis scared tradition. Mi mama was the greatest performer of de art on our island, an' de shaking of her hips expressed her passion an' love for de art of dancing, just as it expressed her happiness at being able to share her special talent with the rest of us like dis.

But mama, she can no longer dance along de hakai, where de waves gently wash along de shore. Several canoes filled with earth ponies of another tribe, came from a place called Tropical Island far across de sea. Queen Starcatcher welcomed them, and showed dem de ho`okipa hospitality of Butterfly Island. But de earth stallions only wanted to conquer, taking us back as captives to sacrifice on dere luakini temples to appease dere volcano god. During the attack, one of thier spears found it's way to mi mama, and now she sleeps with de akumuka de spirits of de ancestors. Papa and de warriors drove de invaders back to de waters of de kai, and threw them into the sea for the sharks to devour. Thier ship was set ablaze, and sank beneath the waves for the lives dey had taken.

When I had ue all of my tears out in grieving, I put on mi mama's grass skirt, and asked to take her place in de hula. A'ole -no!- I was told by de kahuna priests. I was too little to take my mama's place, an' dance before M'oi Starcatcher at de festival. Papa told me I would be old enough to inherit mi mama's sacred role, and dance de  hula on both de land and in de sky. I had hoped dis lu`au in honor of Starcatcher's 30th hanau would give me a chance to prove I could dance. But dat pa`akiki Twinkle Twirl won't even give me a chance ethier. She just as pig-headed as the adults of my own tribe, dis is so not fair!

So I prayed to de menehune spirits who watch over our tibe, and they inspired in me a great idea. Taking mi mamams sacred grass skirt, lei, an' shell necklace from de heiau shrine where dey had been kept since her death, I shall sneak to de portal to Ponyville, an' porve my worth to dere ali`i Princess Wysteria. When she see how well I move my hips to de music, and honor mi mama's memory, she will certainly ask Twinkle Twirl to let mi dance at the lu`au! But I got to be careful, for it is kapu to let a haole outsider to see de sacred hula of our tribe, an' I could get in hohono lua for doing this.

Ohhhh, guardian akumuka, please give me your mana to pull dis off! I hope I can prove all de adults wrong on dis one, an' win de acceptance and approval of our queen for my bold actions. I will only know later if dis ting I am doing is right, But for now, I can only pray mi mama is looking down on me wit pride for what I am about to do. I can' just let de tradition of a hula dancer from our family performing de scared ritual every year die until I'm old enough, it would be a disgrace to my ancestors to do so. I think mi special talent may be dancing just like mi mama, and this could be my big chance to find out just what I'm supposed to do. Well, I need to get going!Aloha, wish me luck!

Honalu loo the Pegasus

Dance the Dance, part 3-A Royal Showing

Dance the Dance part 3- A Royal Showing

It was a warm enough day in Ponyville, and all the ususal hijinks were about with the town's less-than-sane population. Skywishes was in the park, trying to get airbone with six kites tied to her hooves. Sunny Daze was at the beach, trying to catch a wave as every stallion there leered at her bikini-clad form, while every stallion looked on in envy. And Puzzlemint was talking to a sobbing Sweetberry, trying to solve the mystery of the baking mare's missing cookies, even as Scootallo zipped away from the scene on her scooter, even as cookie crumbs trailing out of her mouth as she rode. Yes, it was just another normal day in this abnormal pony town.

And just as this was a normal day for the town, so it was a normal dasy in the town's royal residence. Celebration Castle. Princess Wysteria was holding court, under the watchful eye of her faithful companion, Spike the Dragon. The Purple mare with the white and pink mane had solved every little dispute and dilemma her subjects had brought to her, and only had a few more minor details to deal with before she was finished. Having just dealt with a disagreement over one of Minty's socks clogging up a dryer at the Ponyville laudromat, and was just nw perparing to see the next royal petitioner for the day.

"Now Sweet Breeze, you can't blame Minty her socks got caught in the drum of one of your dryers." The princess of Ponyville sighed, rubbing her temples. "If you need to keep repairs up on those things, just ask Sparkleworks for help."

"Thank you, your highness." The pink mare with the blue mane bowed. "As long as Minty pays for the damages- and agrees not to try and take a ride in the dryers any more."

As the laundry mare bowed and left, Wysteria looked back at her royal advisor. "All right Spike, who's next on the Schedule?"

"Next up, your majesty, is Twinkle Twirl and her dance troupe." The blue scaly dragon replied." Coconut Cream and Desert Rose have come, to go over the final details of the performance at Queen Starcatcher's birthday party."

"Greetings, Princess Wysteria." Desert Rose replied, both ponies bowing to the princess. "We're pleased you agreed to take the time to see us."

"Yes, we hope you'll approve of our lovely routine." Coconut Creme agreed, as the two mares stood, and prepared to dance. "We hope you'll love it, just as much as we hope Queen Starcatcher will-"

Before ethier mare could say anything, a srong wind blew though the throne room. The curtains billowed about wildly, as what seemed to be a strong tropical breeze warmed every pony in the room. Then, a little Pegasus filly, wearing a grass skirt, midsection wrap, and lei, appeared at the top of the stairs across from the throne. Bowing politely towards Princess Wysteria, the small winged pony adressed the crowd of assembled ponies.

"Aloha, honorable princess of de eath ponies! Ahola, members of de royal court!" The little filly declared standing up on her two back hooves, and preparing to dance. "Please, allow me to share dis dance of my tribe with you, so that it may find favor to be performed at de birthday party of de Queen of all Pegasuai!"

"Oh no, it's Honaloo!" Coconut Creme groaned, putting a hoof over her face.

"That kid's gonna spoil everything!" Desert hissed, glaring at the little filly.

The little pon began to dance, her hips swaying slowly to the music at first, then faster and faster. The drumming and other insturmentals seemed to come from all around them, as if it was the wind itself playing the song. (Though Spike thought it had more to do with the magic of that wierd swarm of butterflies the Pegasus commanded) It was a thing of beauty, as the little filly leapt from the top of the stairs, and zipped and darted around the room in graceful arcs, her hips swinging in time to the hula tune like a pendulum.

Every pony in the room stared transfixed by the performance, save for two angry mares who were upset about being upstaged. As the filly can to land back on the stairs for her big finish, the two mares leapt forward, pulling the rug on the stairs right out from underneath the poor little Pegasus.

"I-ahhh- aieeeee!" The little filly shrieked, tumbling down the steps to the floor. The two angry dance mares were standing over her in an instant.

"Honaloo Loo! What were you thinking!?" Desert snapped angrily, scowling at the little filly. "Twinkle Twirl told you there's no room for you in the performance!"

"But- but, I just wanted to...." Tears welled up in the heartbroken little filly's eyes. "I only wanted to dance for de queen...."

"You call that dancing!?" Coconut Grove snapped. "There's no way Twinkle Twirl's going to let you jump around like a hyer rabbit in front of Starcatcher on her birthday!"

"B-but I-I-I..." the little filly was blubbering, tears showering out of her eyes.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

The Pegasus turned and galloped out of the room, crying her eyes out.

"I'm sorry about that, your highness." Cocnut Grove apologized. "She's only a little filly, she didn't know any-"

"Coconut Grove! Desert Rose!" Princess Wysteria's voice suddenly turned ice cold. "In front of my throne, now."

Reazling just how serious thier ruler was, the two mares trotted over, looking up at Wyteria in shock.

"Do you two just realize you made a noble little filly- the niece of the very queen your 'great performance' will be for- cry beause of your insensitviity?"

"Not to mention you just insulted a sacred hula- one of the most important ritual performances of the Butterfly island Pegasus tribe- by comparing it to hopping around like a hyper rabbit?" Spike added, his posh and professional voice betraying his annoyance.

"But Princess Wysteria, we only wanted to-" Coconut started.

"She was interrupting our-"  Desert protested.

"Girls, let me put this to you simply... just so there's no mistake." Wysteria glared at both of them, eyes blazing. "Tell Twinkle Twirl ethier Honaloo Loo performs with your dance troupe at the birthday... or none of you may perform any dancing at any Ponyville function for a whole year! Do I make myself clear?"

dance the dance, part four; dance

Dance the dance, part four; dance

"Twinkle Twirl, you can't do this!" Loop De Lah wailed, protesting as I organized the other dancers on the stage. "You can't possibly let her dance with us on stage for the number, she'll ruin everything!"

"Would you please lay off, it's out of my hooves!" I snapped back, scowling at the exasperated mare. "Thanks to that little show our dear 'friends' put on for Princess Wysteria, I have no choice but to put the filly on stage!"

We were at Queen Starcatcher's birthday luau, celebrating her highness's birthday with all of our Pegasus friends. Lit torches lined all the paths in the village, and Pegasus stallions juggling flame sticks for all the gathered ponies. Ponies of all ages and kinds dance before the great bonfire, clapping their hooves and moving in a great circle in time to the music.

My girls were running to and fro backstage, fusing about and giggling as they peeked out from the curtain. The five had done their best to learn the new, hula-based dance routine I had to throw together at the last minute to accommodate the little Polynesian pony that had been foisted on me. As I look over the chaotic scene of the ponies running around and stumbling into each other in front of me, I say a silent prayer to B'zkere that this whole thing doesn't explode right in my face.

"This is going to be a disaster, I just know it!"  Desert Rose whined, as the other mares put on their leis. grass skirts, and flowers in their manes. "She's too young to be a decent dancer, she'll mess up the whole routine before the first five minutes are over!"

"Hey, I'm right here, ya big stupid-head! I can hear you!" Honalu scowled at Rose, turning away from her mirror in the dressing room. "You old mares think I canna keep up? I'll leave you all in de dust!"

And then, my dancer and the Honalu Loo proceeded to tear into each other, yelling about each other's poor dancing abilities,  and both sides looking like they were ready to trample each other into the ground.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" I yelled in protest, pushing the two apart. "Look, we have to make the best of this situation, so let's all try to get along, okay? And listen kid, you had better be at the top of your game out there... or else!"

"Yes, Miss Twinkle Twirl." The little filly grumbles, looking away ashamedly. "I understand."

I don't mean to seem so condescending towards poor Hona, I am just really, really worried that she's going to mess this up not only for us, but that she's also going to embarass herself. I'm sure she can dance really well, I'm not denying that she can dance, but I've not had the time to give her the proper training, and she hasn't had time to practice with us and learn the timing to work as a unit.

But I don't have any time to worry about that now, as I hear Queen Starcatcher calling my dancers out onto the stage. With an audible gulp, I send the girls out there into the spotlight. The loud drums begin to play, and my ponies rise up on their back  hooves, and began to slowly shake their hips to the music.

I was panicked at first, but... as they started to dance, I could see they had adapted to the new routine rather quickly. Hona moved perfectly to the music, and I hate to say it, but she was doing better than keeping up with my girls. Rather, her flying movements, shaking and moving above the stage while my dancers were limited to hopping across it, proved to be the very center of the entire performance. And it's then I realize just how foolish I've been.

It is said that these hula's tell a story, but I have no idea what the dance Hona haphazardly taught my girls means. But to me, this is a story of a couple of stubborn mares who thought they knew best, and could not even listen to the simple wisdom of a child. She fought hard to honor her mother's memory, and I'm sad to say my girls and I stood against her in trying to fulfill her dreams.

"Bravo! Bravo! Well done, my little ponies!" Starcatcher cheered, as all the ponies clapped their hooves in applause. "We have all done a wonderful job, and many this truly special  birthday even more special!"

The curtain comes down, as my ponies take a final bow. When the party is over, I'll owe a little Pegasus pony one big apology. I just hope that Loop De Lah and the others will be as tolerant and understanding of the little filly, and what she was trying to do. My hopes are dashed, however, when I hear the bickering and yelling when the whole group came backstage again.

"Hey, that was so great! You were all so shaka out dere!" Hona told the other angry girls. "You should all try an' become hula dancers!"

But my dancers, I am sad to say, were having none of it.

"Showoff!" Loop De Lah snapped, scowling at the poor little filly. "What were you trying to do, make us all look bad?!?"

"Yeah, ya big hot dog!"  Desert Rose sneered, as the other mares all ganged up on poor Hona. "You spoiled the whole number!"

But before I can intervene, the little filly ran away, crying her eyes out. "Honaloo, wait!" Angrily, I look back at the other mares. "Ohhhhh, you big dummies! What have you done this time!?"

Stallion's Day Out, part one!

Trading Places, part one

Trading Places, part one

Normally, the Confederacy's city-state of Rainbow Falls was one of the quietest places in all of Ponyland to visit. Tourists, honeymooners, and visitors of every stripe flocked here year round to gaze upon the colorful rainbow waterfalls, to tour the picturesque and quaint village streets- unchanged since the days of old Equestria- or to simply contemplate and pray in the quiet grotto shrines of the rainbow pony monastery. Yes, one could definitely sat that there was no place in all of ponydom that could possibly be more tranquil.

But there was one time of year, that the ponies of this little hamlet looked upon with both dread and anticipation. The one week where traders and bargain hunters from all over the known world poured in, and brought this place to life in a way that seemed unreal for such a normally quiet place. If there was one event in all of Ponyland that could be this chaotic and noisy, the annual Rainbow Falls trader exchange was it. Tables filled with items and creatures of every description lined the streets, and ponies bargained, haggled, and practically fought over everything up for grabs- a sight almost as entertaining as the trades themselves.

It was as the Ponyland express chugged into the Rainbow Falls station, opening it's train car doors and unleashing a new horde of visitors eager for bargains upon this most bizarre of bazaars, that three unusual ponies of note stepped off the train to look around. New arrivals from Dream Valley, this uncanny trio drew far more attention that all of the other recent arrivals combined.

"Wow, it's so amazing to see that this place hasn't changed!" Cheerilee said with a smile, looking around at all the scenery with satisfaction. "With what's happened to the rest of Ponyland, I was afraid rainbow Falls had been turned into a landfill or something!"

"Nope, this place is as wonderful as ever! And this annual swap meet is older than Ponyland itself!"  Ribbon declared, winking around around from booth to booth, and looking over all of the exotic curios. "I'm hoping to pick up some new thread colors, for the dresses Buttons and I are planning to make for this year's fall lineup!"

"Well, you certainly know what you're after!" The earth pony teacher replied with a giggle, watching the blue unicorn with a red and yellow mane teleport around. She then turned to the pink Pegasus with the multicolored mane who had gotten off the train with them. "And what are you planning to trade from the vendors, Locket?"

"Me? Oh, I'm hoping to get new scented candles for my room." Dream Vally's dungeon warden replied, flapping her way over to one of the vendor's tables. "My boyfriend Molasses is coming home from guard duty this week, and I want to surprise him."

"Candles?" Cheerilee whispered in confusion, as Ribbon teleported back over to where she stood. "But why would her boyfriend want-"

"Trust me, Miss Cheerilee, you do not want to know!" The blue unicorn replied with a shiver. "Lets just say she likes to play 'prison warden', even when she's off duty."

The teaching mare's eye twitched, and she felt a pang of pity for that pink stallion, as she watched Locket start bargaining for chains, whips, and candle wax. Trotting off to leave the other two ponies who had come with her to their own trades, Cheerilee moved about to take in the sights and sounds of the bazaar. The pink mare had brought along a saddlebag of her schoolbooks to trade, and was hoping to pick up a vintage Equestrian-styled saddle from one of the vendors.

As she moved about the swap meet, Cheerilee recognized many other familiar faces from Dream Valley, who had come here earlier and set up stalls. On one side, Surprise had a whole table full of her practical jokes and gags to trade, and was laughing her head off when a zebra customer got his nose bit by a piece of snapping gum. On the other side was Medley, offering musical instruments to swap to a curious pair of Blark moles, while Gypsy and Galaxy ran a mystical looking fortune telling booth with moons and stars all over it, offering to make star charts for ponies.

Looking through the crowd, Cheerilee saw a curious mix of every species from every corner of the world of Equinia. It was then, that the curious mare noticed a pitiful-looking old human woman, wearing blue rags and a cloth cap with horns coming out of it. The red-haired crone was stumbling around the stalls, looking frantically through the various wares, as if searching for something.  Seeing the elderly creature seemed to be either lost or confused, Cheerilee trotted up tried to speak to the elderly female.

"Um, exuse me, miss....hello there! Are you looking for something?" Cheerilee asked, as the old crone looked over towards her in confusion. "Is there something I could possibly help you with?"

"A trade! A trade! My life for a trade!" The old woman wailed, holding up a bag in front of her. "will no kind pony take this fine saddle off my hands, so I can get a birthday present for my little grandson's birthday?!"

Cherrilee gazed into the bag, and saw the loveliest pink saddle encrusted with rubies and gemstones, and with a diamond studded bridle and reins. The teacher's eyes nearly bugged out, as visions of her cantering around at the next year's parade of costumes, and wearing that fine piece were already dancing in her head.

"W-would you take a bag of Dream Valley textbooks in trade?" The befuddled teacher asked, holding up her saddlebag. But before she even had time to blink,  the old crone had grabbed the books, dropped the saddle, and vanished into the crowd.

"Well, she certainly is a fast trader."  Cheerilee mere looked around in confusion, before picking the saddle up and placing the fancy saddle on her back. "wow, just wait until the others see the incredible deal I got on this trade!"

And as the contented pony trotted off, an old woman with a sinister smile watched her go, cackling as the teacher went off to find her Dream Valley friends....

Stallion's day out, Part 2

Trading Places, Part 2

Trading Places, Part 2

Everything was so busy at the Rainbow Falls swap meet, with every pony trying to grab the best deals for themselves. It was a bargain hunters paradise, with every mare scrambling for all the best bargain items.

"Oh wow, this is so incredible!" Ribbon exclaimed, looking the German-style pony dress on the vendor's table. "I can't believe you have an original costume from the first production of Hinny of the hills!"

"Yep, and that's from the original Manehatten run, magically preserved and of museum quality." Hollywood, the pink flutter pony with the white mane and silver stars cutie mark, declared. "And it's a very rare find, too. These days, most Bright Valley stage production companies prefer to put on a ponyfied version of the human play the sound of music instead, so you'll won't find this costume anywhere new!"

"Oh, I simply must have this outfit for my collection! Buttons and I can make a whole line of 'Broadway'- themed dresses based on the design!"  Ribbon levitated a shining dress out of her own bag. "How's about trading it for a genuine magic motion fabric dress, from  Surrey Polomare's original enchanted fabric line?"

"A Surrey Piece? Baah, who would want that cheap piece of garbage?" Hollywood scoffed, scorning the dress Buttons had given Ribbon to trade. "Do you have anything of quality in that bag, like an original Coco Pommel, maybe? "

With a sigh, the Dream Valley Dressmaker reached back into her saddlebag again, and said a silent apology to her partner Buttonbelle Polomare for being descended from such a poorly regarded fashionesta. "Let's see what I have..."

Farther down the line of Stalls, Surprise was talking with a customer who was looking at her collection of party hats. The orange twinkle-eyed mare seemed very interested in some of Surprise's inventory!"

"Wow, I could really use these super-duper party hats and streamers for the super-duper foal shower I'm planning for a super-duper couple in Fort Dash next week." Party Time exclaimed. "Whatcha willing to trade for 'em?"

"Gee, that's an awful lot of party hats you got there." The white Pegasus exclaimed, looking at the extremely large stack of items from her table the green-maned earth pony had amassed from her table. "Whatcha got?"

"Well.... I do have this old... Party Cannon..." The other mare groaned, pulling the crazy-colored party canon over to the table by a rope.  "Think this would be enough!"

"A party canon?!? WOW!" Surprise exclaimed in shock, having never actually seen one of the crazy contraptions before. "They don't even make those anymore, and I have sooo always wanted one!" She grinned down at the other pony, flapping around her trading booth excitedly. "You got yourself a deal!"

Surprise slapped the other pony an the back affectionately, sending Party Time's gemstone twinkle eyes flying out of her sockets, and into the party cannon. Suddenly loaded, the party cannon fired off with a loud BOOM, sending the gemstone eyes flying over the horizon.

"Hey, I can't see anything!" The earth mare protested, stumbling around with her hooves outstretched. "What's going on?"

"YIKES! Uh oh! Ummmm..." Looking around frantically, Surprise quickly picked up a pair of billiard 8-balls of the table, and stuck them into Party Time's eye sockets. "There you go, good as new!" She said with a worried laugh. "I think..."

"Wow, thanks, Miss Surprise!" Party Time shook her hoof, before her body began to wobble around in a strange way. "Whooaaah, I gotta be going! My party sense is telling me there's a bunch of ponies in need of a party somewhere near here!"

"Okay, see you later!" Surprise exclaimed, as the now-blinded pony stumbled away with her with her newly traded stuff, with every other pony staring at her 8-ball eyes in bewilderment.

Surprise sighed, and looked at the ground. "Gee, I sure wish I had something like great great grandma Pinkie's party sense..."

Across the way, Locket was looking over the- ahem, *exotic* wares at the table owned by Stockings, a rather shady looking white earth mare with a pink mane. Looking through the hoofcuffs and manacled chains, the twinkle eyed pony glanced up at the vendor.

"Nice collection you've put together here, I really love the barbed wire cat of nine tails, and the black leather zip-up one piece." The Pegasus told the other pony with a smirk. "But I was wondering if you had an old-style metal riding crop? I'd be willing to trade a spiked collar with a leash for it."

"Hmmm, you and your stallion go for that kinda stuff, huh?" Stockings flashed her a complementary smile. "Yeah, I might have one, but  it's gonna cost you a little more than that cheap-looking collar there!"

"Oh drat, I was hoping we could do some business here!" Locket replied with a sigh, putting her exotic collection back into her saddlebag. " You came so highly recommended from Firefly, and-"

"Wait, Firefly Dash of Dream Valley?!" The other mare's eyes suddenly lit up. "Why didn't you say so! Firefly's my 1# best customer in Ponyland! I'll take your trade!"

While the two slightly warped mares closed their deal at Stocking's table, a disgusted Baroness Twilight Shine was sitting in the royal booth, listening to two mares bicker over how unfair there trade was. This year, it had been Majesty's turn to attend the Rainbow Falls bazaar, and she had asked Twilight, as the descendant of Princess Twilight Sparkle to fill in for her. And right now the stand-in princess could see exactly why her queen had wanted out of her royal duty this year.

" Your highness, I'm telling you this trade wasn't fair!" Scrumptious, a white mare with a green mane and watermelon cutie mark, protested. "I tried out that old baking pan that Gingerbread traded to me, and every set of muffins I've made in that pan has burned to a crisp!"

"Your end of the trade wasn't fair?! HA!" Gingerbread, the white earth pony with twinkle eyes and a gingerbread man cutie mark, retorted. "That set of cookie cutters you traded me aren't sharp enough to cut the dough when I press them in!"

"Those cutters cut just fine, you wannabe cook!"

"Wannabe cook?! Why, you fast food chef-!"

"Amateur baker!"

"Yeah? Well, you're a half-baked pizza!"

"Glass-eyed freak!"

The two mares leapt on each other, and started to swril around and around in a dizzying catfight. Thoroughly disgusted, Twilight adjusted the crown on her head, and finally stamped her hoof in anger.

'"Ladies, ladies, enough!" The Baroness declared angrily. "If you can't behave like proper mares, I'll have you sent over to the swap meet's play area and ball bit with the foals and stallions!" The two ponies immediately stopped fighting, and composed themselves. "Now, if the two of you are so unhappy with your trade, why don't you both just trade back the item you don't want, for your original item you each had in the first place?"

The two ponies started to say something, then both looked at each other in surprise. Before looking back and the princess and nodding.

"Oh yeah, I never thought of that!" Scrumptious exclaimed, trotting over and picking up her box of cookie cutters. "Thanks so much for solving our problem for us, your highness!"

"That's such a great idea! I can't believe we didn't think of it ourselves!" Trotting over and picking up her pan, Gingerbread smiled back at the unicorn. "So long, Twilight! See you back at Dream Castle!"

As the two other mares trotted away happily, the pink unicorn slumped down in her throne with a sigh.

"That does it, I'm going home!" Twilight growled to herself, as she quietly got off her throne and slipped away. "I'm sure nothing will happen here at the bazaar without me around to tell people their trades were bad!"

...

As all of the ponies at the swap meet milled about their trades, one pink earth mare trotted about with her newfound saddle. No other ponies could see the tendrils of energy uncoiling from the saddle, and no one could see hose tendrils draining energy from nearly every pony at the bazaar. And from a crystal ball in one of the fair's covered booths, three witches watched the whole event unfold with interest.

"Ha, my trap is working like a charm! Soon, every pony at this fair will be my helpless prisioner!"

"Wow, mom! Your plan is going great!"

"Yeah ma, those little ponies will never no what hit em'!"

"How many times have I told you two NOT TO CALL ME MOTHER!"

"Sorry Hydia...."

Stallion's Day Out, part 3

Trading Places, part 3

Trading Places, part 3

As Cheerilee Wandered from stall to stall the strange saddle on her back continued to glow with an eerie light, totally unbeknownst to it's wearer. And as she passed each vendor's table, something odd seemed to occur with every trade that was occurring. As the teach pony walked past Surprise's booth, the white Pegasus was trying to make a bargain with Locket, over a piece of merchandise.

"Hey, Surprise? You got any roman candles in your inventory?" The pony jailer asked coyly, looking through the stock of practical jokes. "I'd love for my boyfriend to get a really big BANG out of our reunion!"

"Naw, 'fraid I don't have any fireworks in my stock, Locket." The insane mare replied with a giggle. "Though if I do have anything ya want, I'd love ta trade for a pizza... cause I'm really hungry!"

But as the pink earth pony passed by, her saddle flashed with an eerie light. Suddenly, Locket was hurled into the air, and began to explode into a series of explosions, much to the surprise of all the ponies around her. And before Surprise even had a chance to react, the white Pegasus instantly changed into a pizza with Surprise's white wings. The bizarre food dish flew off by itself, without the saddle-wearing pony even noticing.

"Huh, now where did my friends get to?" Cheerilee asked in annoyance, looking around the bazaar as she trotted along her way. "I wanted to show them my new saddle!"

As she walked past Hollywood's table, Ribbon was still haggling with the flutter pony over another article of clothing.

"All right Hollywood, you got to admit this purple Rarity number is worthy of a trade." She declared, pulling another outfit out of her bag. "Certainly this would be worth a needle and spool of that rainbow thread!"

"Ha! Rainbow thread is far to valuable to trade for what you hold!" Holly replied with a laugh. "The only piece of enchanted clothing I'd trade that for  would be a rainbow thread scarf that knits itself!"

As soon as the two mares had finished speaking, the saddle flashed again. With a loud  *poof!*, Ribbon became a spool of rainbow thread with a needle, and Hollywood was transformed into a rainbow-colored scarf. The earth pony with two pigtails barely noticed, as the needle and thread floated up, and began to knit the scarf longer and longer.

"LOCKET! RIBBON!" She called out in frustration, the saddle's enchantment making her totally oblivious to the chaos around her. "Oh dear, where could they have gone?!?"

As the hours passed, a sense of Chaos presided over whole whole swap meet, as trades suddenly came to life everywhere the confused teacher went, and behind it all, and old human witch was cackling manically, pleased with all the anarchy her actions had brought about.

"Yes! Yes! look at this little ponies run around in fear and panic!"  The old hag roared, as her two daughters looked on with evil grins. "This'll be a swap meet those ponies will never forget!"

"Yeah, you really showed them, Hydia!" Draggle, the taller daughter, agreed. "You gave em what they traded for, but not the way they really wanted it!"

"Yeah, and the saddle absorbed a little energy each time it carried out a trade!" Reeka agreed. "We'll have enough magic to power our spells for years!"

And as the three witches were gloating about their success, it was then that the magic began to loose it's hold on miss Cheerilee.

"Huh? Wait a minute!" The pink mare said groggily, shaking her head as if coming out of a daze. "What they hay is going...."

The earth pony teacher was greeted by the sight of a flying pizza with wings zooming away from a hungry Pegasus, a rainbow scarf was wrapping some poor pony up like a mummy, while a floating spool and thread knitted her a matching sweater, while a screaming Pegasus seemed to be spinning and exploding in midair endlessly. As the other ponies around her screamed and ran in every direction, the stunned pony could only stand there, her jaw hanging open, and eye twitching, unable to take in everything around her.

"Did I... did I just miss something?"

Stallion's day out- part four

Trading Places, part 4

Trading Places, part 4

Cheerilee wandered around the swap meet in a daze, as everything in the world around her seemed to have gone totally mad. She tried to ignore a flying pizza that zipped over her head, and the winged food was being chased by two deer hopping past her, one of whom the teacher could've sworn looked like Twilight. Staring at her surroundings in disbelief, the pink earth pony tried to make sense out of all the nonsense surrounding her.

"Okay, maybe some kind of powerful artifact that was being traded went haywire, and affected everybody?" Cheerilee thought aloud, as a floating needle and thread chased a scarf down the path beside her. "Okay, maybe Discord came back and is wreaking havoc again? No, Paradise told me he was dead. Ohhh, there must be some explanation for all this wackiness!"

"Cheerilee! Help meeeeee!" The exploding mass of spinning fireworks above her wailed. "I can't stop blowing up!"

"Oh no, Locket! Is that you?!?" Cheerile called out in shock. "Oh no! What in the world happened to you!?"

"Miss Cheerilee, something horrible happened!" The flying pizza cried out in a familiar voice. "All our trades became real in a twisted way, and now we're all cursed!"

"Surprise! How did-?!" But the terrified mare was interrupted by a needle and rainbow thread, that wound it's way around her, and tried to sew her tail into a single long braid. "Ahhhh, get away from me!" The mare kicked the spool and needle away, and made a run for it. Bolting around the corner, she bumped into another mare... who didn't seem to have a mouth!

"Mmmmph!" The other pony screamed horrifically, the sound of her panicked shrieks coming from her throat. "Mmmpppphhh!"

"Aieeeee! Get away!" The pink mare screamed, galloping away from the mouthless horror. But everywhere she went, the some other freakish monstrosity greeted her. In one area of the bazaar, Daring Do and the power ponies were teamed up in battle against the Mane-iac and Azutohil, no doubt having come to life from a vintage traded comic book. In another area, what looked like a construction pony was being chased by a bunch of tools he had traded for, obviously getting more than he bargained for, as his own saw tried to cut him in half.

"This is insanity!" Cheerilee gasped, trying not to crack up as a living supper dish ran by her, carrying a living spoon in it's arms. "Who could possibly have caused all this craziness!?"

"Why, I did my dearie." The old hag who she had traded with before appeared out of nowhere, cackling wickedly. "And it's all thanks to you, my dear little pony!"

"You? But who are-" And suddenly, remembering the descriptions Lickety Split and Gusty had given her, the earth pony finally realized just who she was dealing with. "You... you're Hydia!  The witch from the volcano of gloom!"

"That's right, dearie! And that wonderful saddle you took from me, did all of this!" The old witch replied with a chuckle. "And by the time sundown comes, all of these ponies will be like this, forever!"

"You tricked me!" The angry mare leaped at Hydia, but the old witch disappeared in a cloud of smoke. "I demand you change everyone back, right now!"

"Afraid not, dearie! Making ponies miserable is way too much fun!" Her cackle carries on the wind. "Oh, and you can keep the saddle, it's almost out of magic, anyway!"

As the old hag vanished from view, the teaching pony looked around frantically. "Okay, this isn't unsolvable, it's trades that drive the magic! If I remember my rules of the Rainbow Falls swap meet, all I have to do is find Twilight, and get all these trades declared annulled!"

But even as Cheerilee thought about this, she again noticed the throne Twilight was in was empty. Trotting over towards the empty stands, the mare found a note declaring that Twilight had had enough of the bazaar's ponies whining, and she was going home.

"Okaaaaayyyyy... looks like I can't get help from Twilight!" Cheerilee sighed, trying to keep herself from panicking. "I'm sure I can think of something... before it's too late!"

But as the hours ticked by, no ideas about how to solve the current predicament came to her mind. Cheerilee paced around the swap meet, totally unable to think of any solution to Hydia's curse. She tried to think  hard, of something- anything- that could be a loophole the villain hadn't thought of in her evil scheme... but all the insane distractions around her prevented the teacher from coming up with a plan.

"Blast it, Locket! Could you please keep it down up there!" Cheerilee snapped skyward, finally at the end of her rope. "I can't think with all of that racket!"

"I'm sorry Cheerilee! I can't help it!" The Pegasus wailed, obviously still in great pain. "I just feel like I have to keep exploding!"

The teacher snorted in disgust, trying to ignore all the racket from above. Realizing how hungry she was, the teaching reached out and grabbed a slice of a pizza that seemed to be floating right in front of her.

"Cheerileeee!" The horrified voice of Surprise wailed, as the teacher lifted a slice she had pulled from the pie to her mouth. "Noooooo!"

"Oh no, I'm so sorry!" The mare wailed apologetically. Wandering around the bazaar full of madness, the pink earth mare finally snapped.

"Gah! This is insanity!" The pink pony exclaimed. "I can't even get a moment to think about-" And her thoughts were again interrupted, as the flying rainbow scarf whipped down and wrapped around her face.

"Mppphhh! GET OFF! THAT'S IT I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF TRANSFORMED PONIES!" The mare spat angrily, as she threw the scarf off. But as she looked up at the sky, Miss Cherilee quickly realized that time was running out.

"Oh no! the sun is setting!" The pink pony wailed. "What am I going to do now!?"

Rainbow Pony series: Everyone knows it's Windy!

Interlude: One of those days...

Interlude: One of those days...

Okay, before I begin, please take note of the fact I haven't had my coffee yet as I'm writing this, so apologies if my usual cheerfulness in not present in my account.

You know the kind of situation in life you just can’t stand? You know, the ones where your starting off, having a nice day, then your life gets so incredibly messed up that you wish you had never been born? Yeah, today was one of those days, and I even regret getting up this morning in the first place!

It was a Saturday morning in Dream Castle, and I was lying in bed, and reading the latest  collection of fairy tales Megan had brought over from the human world for me. Beside me hubby was still asleep (I let the big lug  sleep in on the weekends- yeah, your welcome Tornado!), and Ember was busy watching Saturday morning cartoons. I had about an hour to kill before my laundry was done, so I decided to catch up on my reading.

Now, this was a day I had gone out of my way to set aside for myself. So there I was, just getting to the good part with the prince and princess, when there was a bright flash of light in the room.

"What the?!? Where am I?" I called out, as I found myself in a serious void of nothing. As the light slowly faded, however, I slowly found myself standing on a translucent runway, with a glittery sky of stars around me. Floating over my head were looked like a series of TV screens, all floating in midair, all displaying what I think were different experiences from during my life. (Speaking of which, most of those images remind me of how boring my life has been.... damn I want my teen years back, I feel gypped!)

"Oh great, this is what I get for drinking that old cider that was past it's expiration date last night." I grumble.

Anyway, there's another flash of light, and a purple alicorn with a crown appears. The over sized purple mare smiles at me, and begins her annoying spiel.

"Hello, my brave little pony." The mare begins, in an annoyingly sweet voice. "I am so pleased to see that my descendant is finally ready for this very special day."

Oh great, Twilight Sparkle. The little perfect bookworm of the family we all have trouble living up to the legacy of. She's probably here to deliver some dire prophecy, or to give me some new magical ability.*sigh* Why can't dead relatives ever show up after lunch?!?

"All right, let's get this over with then." I grumble, shaking out my still messy mane. "What is it this time, a monster threatening Ponyland? An evil warlord. Honestly,  that seems to happen every week around here!"

"But... but I..." Great great grandma seems stunned, like she didn't expect that kind of response from me, I guess menopause really does dull a mare's senses. "I came here to give you the gift... of alicorndom!" Her ears drooped. "Y-you've earned it, after all you've done for ponykind!"

"Oh, really? And here I thought you had come to find out where Firefly keeps her porn stash!" I say in a mocking tone. "Look grandma, I'm about as interested in a pair of wings as I am in a hole in my head. So why don't you just fly you're sagging old flank back up to those pearly gates, so I can have my coffee?"

"W-wait this is the ultimate gift of pony enlightenment I am offering you here!" My annoying ancestor protested, obviously still shocked I'm turning down this 'great honor'. "You're the fairy tale pony of dreams and wishes! Haven't you always wanted to be a princess?!"

"Look grandma, did you see that stallion back there in hat cozy bed you zapped me away from?" I growl at her, my patience wearing to it's absolute thinnest. "He's already told me, time and again, that I am HIS princess already! So I really don't need your silly little pony upgrade to be special, thank you very much!"

"Hmph, looks like you're not yet ready to receive the gift I was going to bestow on you!" She snorts indignantly, as she and the cosmic background fade away. "Perhaps you will be a little more humble and grateful the next time I appear before you! Farewell!"

There is another flash of light, and I'm back in bed with snoring hubby again. Putting my fairy tale book over on the nightstand, I roll over and pull the covers up over my head, snuggling up to the big blue lug to keep warm during this cold September weather. Good grief, why do annoying relatives always have to visit during this time of the month!?! &$&$#@!

Rainbow Ponies series: Glowing Moonstone

Stallion's Day Out, part one!

Stallion's Day Out, part one!

The other day, dear readers, I decided to ask my fellow boy pony Score what being a stallion in Dream Valley was like (you know, since the others all consider me an eggheaded nerd for hanging around the girls all the time, and enjoy frequently stuffing me into a closet for fun). Upon my asking, Dream Valley's resident football player told me this odd tale...

Ehhh, what can I say, Tornado? It was just another one of Those days...

You know, we stallions have it pretty good here at Dream Castle... three square meals a day, a roof over our heads, the mares doin' all the baby raising and diaper-changing. Sure, there is the mandatory military service to the crown, and we each have to pull our weight around here. But the cool thing is we get to leave the hard stuff- like thinking- to the women folk. But it can get really boring around here sometimes, doing nothing but hanging out.  But sometimes, somethin' interesting does  happen around these parts. Lemme tell you about one such day....

It started like an ordinary Sunday, and me and some of the guys were hanging out in the dungeon (our own little private stallion cave in the lower levels of Dream Castle). Tex and Salty were over shooting a most awesome game of pool, while Barnacle and Chief were playing a cards over in the corner. As forr myself, I was totally racking up a high score on our newest arcade machine from the human world- a game called Centipede, I think- when Salty looked up from what he was doing, and commented;

"Dude."

Looking up at his friend from the card game, Barnacle added. "Dude!"

"Duuuuuuuuuude!" Chief agreed, as the three of them looked to Tex.  Shooting the eight ball into the side pocket, our dear bud looked up and finally added the very deep and profound statement.....

"Dude"

Having all come to such a consensus, my most excellent and awesome amigos had decided they were bored, and were going to try something different.  Sneaking our way over towards the Castle's mechanic garage, we saw our mechanic-type buds Four Speed and Trucker weren't currently not on the premises. So we did the proper stallion-like thing, and immediately started messin' with everything in the place we didn't understand. Of course, being the totally awesome dudes we are, we hardly got ourselves in any trouble at all!

Okay, I mean sure... Salty cried out "Dude!" when he got a face full of oil from that one gadget. And Salty won't be sayin' "Dude" for awhile after where he shot himself with that hot glue gun. Be we all got a totally righteous laugh when Barnacle made that  hilariously obscene gesture with that screw driver at that picture of Paradise hangin' on the wall, totally busting a gut while going "Duuu-uuuuu-uuuu-ude!"

Anyway, that's when we spotted IT... a wild and crazy machine, which Four Speed and Trucker musta put together from the odds and ends junk layin' around the castle. A totally giant manifold and smoke spewin' engine on a pair of giant wheels! That dragster and an awesome flamin' chassis, a crazy eight ball clutch on the end of a long floor shift, and the wildest pair of fuzzy dice we ever did see! Anyway, the guys all piled into that wild ride, and took off. I didn't goo off with em', of course... I still wanted to knock Ice Crystal's high score off that new arcade machine before he got back.

What happened after that?  Dude, I don't know, you'll hafta go ask one of the other guys where that car went... and why it came back in fifty pieces. Right now, I gotta get to my football practice, later dude!"

Huh, what an interesting tale, I wonder which stallion I should go ask to tell me the next part...

Minty the cursed

Stallion's day out, Part 2

Stallion's day out, Part 2

Now it's Salty's turn. I went to see him on his small boat, right before he went out on a small fishing expedition, he briefly told me his side of the story...

Avast there, Tornado me lad! So, ye want me ta tell you about what happened the day me and the other landlubbers (well, except for me captain, Barnacle)  made off with that Pony roadster that 4-speed built, hm? Well let me tell ye, lad.... that was a tale worth the hearin! Rarely had we had such a wild time out o' the sea as that day, and I'll certainly say, it was a day I'll never forget...

Twas a dark an' stormy day, and me and me shipmates had set our mainsail, and were crusin through Ponyland on that fine vessel. Bumpin' up and  down over hills and dales, we roared on out of Dream Valley, and into the mysterious lands beyond. We were laughin' and jokin' and having a great old time, when we spotted a buncha  geese crossin the road ahead o' us.

"You better slow down, Ca'pn!" I warned Baracle, spottin the family o' geese first. "Unless ye be wishin ta hit that flock o' fowl on our starboard side!"

"Well, Mister Salty, ye'd best batten down yer hatches!"  Me captain warned, as his hoof hit the gas. "C'ause that's what I be amin' ta do!"

HONK!

SPLAT!

By the seven seas, those geese made one nasty mess on the front grill! We had feathers flying back in our faces, an' there was a red gooey mess everywhere!  So we stopped the car, and collected up all the fresh meat for the castle kitchens, before happily continuing on our way. Later, chief was messing around with the dashboard switches, and spotted a big red one on th'  console in front o' him.

"Begorah, now what be the parpouse of this switch?" The Irish pony asked, as he hit the button. Sure enough, the lousy landlubber got what he had comin', as a boxing glove shot out of the glove compartment, hitting ol Chief straight in th' muzzle!"

"Och, saints presarvhe us!" The landlubber exclaimed, before passing out in the front passenger seat.

"That's what ya get fer messin with somethin' ya don't understand, ya Fenian fool!" The Cap'n snorted at him. "Hope ye enjoy yer nap, laddy!"

We were all getting a good laugh at our unconscious friend's expense, when we just happened to hit a speed bump in one o' the tall thickets  of grass we were passing. Suddenly, a very big, green and angry form emerged from behind the bush, thoroughly mad  at the red hot roaster that had run over it's tail.

"Graaaahh, stupid Ponies!" The huge scaly monster roared at us, scarin the dickens out of our entire crew. "Me gonna squash you good!"

"Holy hay! It's an alligatorsarus!" Tex cried out, his eyes goin' wider than two clams "Barnacle, hit the gas! Let's skeedadle!"

And our shipmate was right, it was bein' an alligatorsaurs after us! Big mean buggers, who start life looking like small, toothless baby alligators. But as the centuries pass, these scaly scaliwags can live a few thousand years, tearn' things up and causin' chaos for whole generations of ponies! But with the look in this angry reptile's eye, I didn't think we were gonna last five seconds!

"Arghhhh! Stupid ponies no get away from me!"  The big palooka roared. "Gummy Gatorsaur gonna tear you apart!"

Ah! Look at the time Tornado, I need to get out there and bring in today's catch. Ask one o' the others if ye want the rest of the story, I'm sure they'd be willin ta fill in the gaps.

Anyway, good salin' to ye, laddie! Farewell!"

The Christmas Pony

Stallion's Day Out, part 3

Stallion's Day Out, part 3

Yeee hawwww, pardner! Good to see y'all again, Tornado! How's that little pink filly a yours again? What? Yer askin' me about mah little run around with the other stallions? Yeah, we did have quite an adventure that day, I reckon. The other stallions and and I still tell tall tales about that whole shindig, an' I'll never forget haow dangerous the whole thang got!

There we were, drvin' as fast as we could, tryin' ta get away from that ornery critter that was barin' down on the roadster. Salty had jumped forward and takin the wheel from Barnacle, and the rest of us fellers were crowded back in the rumble seat, watcin' that varmint runnin' towards us like a bat outta hell.

"Faster, Salty, faster!" Mah pardner Cheif yelled, havin' woke up from his little beauty sleep. "Ta be sohre, that turrrriuble monster is gonna tear us ta pieces if he catches us!"

"Arrrrrr, matey! I be pushin' this vessel as fast as she'll go!" My sailor compadre called back, soundin' as scared a moue in the middle of a cattle stampede. "But that big ole'  beastie's ganin up on us faster than I can drive!"

"Grahhhhh, you no run away from Gummy!" The over sized lizard called out to us, his jaws snappin' at our tail hairs as he caught up with the automobile. "Me have stupid ponies for desert!"

The big feller came a runnin' after us, getting just a few inches from our flanks. Suddenly, that big critter lunged forward, and with a loud SNAP of his jaws, he took my tail clean off my flank!

"Yeowouch!" I wailed like a wounded coyote, and lookin' down at the little stub of tail hair still left on my flank, I snarled. "Awww, now that just tears it! Now yer really gonna get it, ya big dumb lizard!"

Now, we stallion's normaly don't like a hurtin' big dumb animals, but sometimes a pony's gotta do, what a pony's gotta do! Barnacle and I nodded to each other, an he pulled out those fancy pistols o' his, an' I yanked out mah trusty sawed of shotgun. When the big brute opened wide, we open fire on the big varmint's mouth.

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!    KERPOW  KERPOW! KERPOW!

Man, the two of us cut loose on that ornery critter, firin' bullet after bullet at that nasty varmint! Shot after shot rang out, and wheeeee doggie we pumped that bugger full of enough lead to drop a dinosaur!

"Arooooooooo!" The big feller wailed, as he went down like a stone. When we saw we had killed the huge critter, my amigos and I immediately started to cheer.

Yeeee hawwww!" I yelled at the top of my voice. "We got the ornery critter! We got-"

Actually, I reckon we shoulda been paying more attention to the road, cause that's when we ran into trouble.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Gollll-ly! The five of us were sent flyin' and that car was blown into a million bits! I personally ended up face-first in the mud, and I think Salty landed somewhere across from me! Anyway pilgrim, I got a date with a lovely white Pegasus with a good sense of humor, so if you want the story's end, you'll have to go talk ta Chief.  Later Tornado... ya'll come back now, y'hear?

A Christmas Vision

Stallion's day out- part four

Stallion's day out- part four

And now, the end of the Story, from Chief, Dream Valley's resident fire fighter...

Ore and Begorah, it be good ta be seein ya again, Tornado! So, it be the story o' what happened in the roadster that day that ya are after, be it now? Ta be shore, I be more than willin' ta share that little yarn with ye. Now, here's how the whole thing happened...

There we were, just a pullin ourselves out of the wreck, when all of a sudden Thundercloud and his Pegasus guards came a flyin' up behind us. Needless ta say, they were not bein happy with our little adventure- they made tha abundantly clear with the rough treatment they gave us on the way back home. We were practically dragged back through they air like misbehavin' foals, while the remanin' Pegasus guards carried tha pacies of the automobile back followin' us.

And our reception back at Dream Castle wasn't any better, ta be certain. Och, saints preserve us! Queen Majesty was a pacin' back and farth, snortin an' a fumin' over our little excarsion in the car.

"How could you disgrace Dream Valley in this way?!" Said she. "I should have Locket throw you into the dungeons for a week for your foul misbehavior!"

Needless ta say, none of us stallion were in our right frame o' mind.  But it was Tex who finally shot his mouth off a wee bit too much.

"Awww, shut yer flankin flankhole, ya filthy tramp!" Our cowboy friend a' bellowed. "I ain't takin' no lip from the ornery laikes a you!"

Ohhh, good lairdy! No one had evar spoken ta the queen in that way! Ta be shore, the queen gave us a murderous look aftar that, and we all thought we all whar headed to tha' glue factory. An eerie silence hung in the air, until my own Beloved blue Pegasus angel came zooming into the room, pleading our case.

"Your highness, I urge your hesitancy on any rash decisions or actions!" Me wife begged Majesty. "Their hasty and irrational actions are the fault of another mare's childish pranks!"

And so, Wind Whistler went about explanin' the whole situation, and ta be shore, t'was quite a doozy! Tarns out Surpsie thought it might be funny ta replace Brnacle's stash of cider with Applejack's vintage cider from old Equestria. The fermented drink clouded our judgement, and tha's why we acted like a bunch a' daft dimwits! (Though bein a true sone o' the emerald isle, I could handle the drink far better than the other laddies could!) Och, I canna believe that prankster thought getting us sauced would be a funny prank! Still, I am happy we got ourselves out of that wee scrape.... and Surprise is now stuck for the next month with the right and honorable job of cleanin' out the Bushwoolies litter box! HA!

Anyway Tornado, now tha I told ye about that wee incident, why don't I spin a yarn about the Isle of Pony, me far away homeland where I was born as a wee barin? Och, I still remember the green forests and fields, an' the sound o bagpipes in the moarning a' rollin over the moor.Och, aye can remeber when I was a young colt, one particular Monday when I went into town, and-

(And that was the point I was lucky enough to slip away from the Fenian pony, who was so busy talking to himself that he didn't even notice I was gone! Well, dear readers, there you have the day in the life of the stallions of Dream Valley! Oh boy, am I glad I spend all my time with the mares....)

A look back, and a look ahead

Rainbow Ponies series: Flutterbye by night....

Rainbow Ponies series: Flutterbye by night....

Oh, my! I wasn't expecting any guests today! Oh dear, this place is such a mess, I'm so sorry this holy shrine doesn't look more presentable! I mean, if I had known you were coming, I could've cleaned the place up, and it wouldn't be such a mess while you were here, and you wouldn't be so uncomfortable in such a messy kitchen.  And I don't want you to feel that I wasn't the best host, or that I didn't want you here, because all the children of B'zekre are welcome here, and I wouldn't want to to think that-

What? okay, okay... I promise I'll come down. Yes, my name is Flutterbye, and I'm a holy sister in the order of of the rainbow monks. What? Oh no, I'm no relation to Lady Fluttershy... even though I talk like her, and I act like her, and I have the same special talent as her, and I sort of look like her... fate is just kind of funny that way, I guess. Well, I don't totally look like her, I mean my coat is orange instead of yellow, and I have the enlightened rainbow mane of my order. I guess that's why the flutter ponies let me serve as their clergy here, I look so much like their favorite historical  pony.

Oh! Mister Fluffykins! Now that's just rude! I'm so sorry, dear visitor, my dear wittle bunny rabbit didn't mean any harm. I really do love him sooo much, just like I love all my little friends here! This little birdie over here is duck soup, and I found him out by queen Rosedust's private pond, and nursed him back to health. And this cute little puppy is Brandy, a helpless little doggie who was left homeless after the destruction of Paradise estate.  I so love taking care of all of these animals, and I'm one of the few ponies who can actually understand what they say. So far, I've never met any critter I didn't like... except for icky icky icky spiders, I can't stand spiders!

Animals are so much easier to get along with than other ponies, I get really, really nervous talking to my own kind. ever since I was a filly, I really couldn't deal with the other little ponies much- which is sad, because I always really, really wanted to be friends with them. I always wanted to help everyone, wither they are pony or animal, that's why I joined the rainbow ponies as a teen. But it's hard for me to make friends with my fellow mares. And even just talking to stallions, to potential boyfriends... oh, I simply turn a deep shade of red, and want go curl up in a ball somewhere and die! I can't believe I'm so scared of socializing, but it just frightens be to even say hello!

I can get along pretty well with the flutter ponies though, they have been so very nice and understanding to me! Queen Rosedust is one of my dearest friends, and she and her subjects teat me as if I were one of their own. Oh, I don't know why I'm not as nervous around the flutters as I am with other kinds of ponies... maybe it's because they so resemble the butterflies I love so much, with their big and bright and colorful wings. I love it when I can perform a wedding or a christening or some other holy service for them. It makes me feel all special inside! You know, I really wish I could've gotten the chance to meet Fluttershy, she always seems like such a nice and sweet and gentle pony! I really think we could've been friends, and I would love to have gotten some tips from her on how to take better care of my animals!

Oh, what's that? Oh, of course you came here to make an offering and pray at the shrine of B'zekre. It's so lovely, isn't it? A temple to the holy one, organically grown right into the middle of the tree. Before Queen Rosedust invited me here, Flutter Valley was the one kingdom to still hold to the old ways here in the confederacy. This tree house was a shrine to Princess Luna- she was the only deity the Flutters would worship, you know, their hatred of Celestia and all- but when I came in, I began to show them the kindness and love that the way of the rainbow monks had taught to me. With gentle love and nurturing, I slowly began to win Rosedust's subjects over to my message.

They seemed to respond so well to my friendliness, I suppose because I was the first pony to approach them with understanding rather than hostility and force. I cared for their sick and ailing pets, and well as sick and ailing flutter ponies, and over the course of a year I won more and more converts. Finally, Rosedust herself was baptized, and the statue of Luna was removed and flung into the rainbow river, replaced with a statue of the horsemaster. I'll never understand why some ponies think shouting and threats will win other ponies over... if there is one thing we can learn from the ponygans, it's their age-old message of friendship may be the secret to solving all of Ponyland's problems.

Oh dear, it seems to be getting late now. I need to attend to the queen for the daily closing of the royal court at sunset, so I'll leave you here to pray and make your offering. I'd recommend you stay with me in the shrine for the night, as the flutters still have issues with non-flutters who aren't from Dream Valley. I'll personally see you to the border in the morning. I'm really happy that you decided to stop at my shrine here in Flutter Valley, traveler, and I hope we can speak again in the morning. May the holy B'zekre always light your path!

I, Megan

Rainbow Pony series: Everyone knows it's Windy!

Everyone knows it's Windy!

Hello, good traveler, it is so nice to have you visit my shrine here at Misty Mountain. While my acolytes and I seem to be busy around here, we most certainly always have the time to speak with a traveler who is in need of our aid. My name is Windy, and like the wind I am always blowing about Misty Mountain, my hooves and mind ever busy on some endeavor or another.  (That's why my cutie mark resembles a bunch of swirly lines representing a blowing wind, after all.) Now, what brings you here to my humble cathedral, and how may I be of service to you?

Wait, what's that? You're making a pilgrimage to all of the Horsemaster shrines, and you've already visited Flutterbye's chapel in Flutter Valley? Well then, this little lavender unicorn will be happy to show you around! Misty Mountain has a long and proud tradition of the Hosremasterist faith, you know, and I'd be most happy to share both the story of this proud and ancient tradition, and of myself. Oh wow, there's so much for me to tell you... and you seem so eager for me to tell you all about it!

Well now... let's see, where to start? Well, the temple you see around us, is called the Bergerkriche. It's large columns and spacious interior is done in a style the humans call Gothic, and is highlighted by those lovely golden chandeliers with all those candles in them to illuminate the cathedral. This is where I carry out wedding, funerals, and other ceremonies for the Misty Mountain faithful. Even before this city was built, it is said the prophet Zorypontha once gave a sermon on this mountain's slopes- the cathedral is said to have been built on the very spot in which his sermon was given. (Which, by the way, is a personal pet peeve of mine- our faith is called hosremasterism, not Zoroponthiism. The great and holy Zoropontha was merely the wonderful prophet who turned Horsemasterism from a minority faith of ye olden Equestria, to the main religion of modern Ponyland. So everyone please stop using that term!)

The ponies of Misty Mountain have always been loyal followers of the horsemaster, but that sadly cannot be said of our ruler. Princess Cadence, given our city to rule after the ponies of the Crystal Empire threw her out, was given our community to rule by Princess Luna. Since then, there has been tension here between ruler and ruled, as Cadence and the crystal courtiers she brought from the empire practiced alicornism. But for centuries the Horsemasterist Misty Mountaineers respectfully tolerated their monarch's  choice without complaint, and in return cadence and her court left the majority to their beliefs, in return. I will say the recent passing of Cadence, and the ascension of her horsemasterist daughter to the throne, isn't something my congregation celebrated... for they still loved their alicorn princess dearly.

As to myself, I am the daughter of two humble ponies from Misty Mountain-  my father was the city Burhgermiester, my mother a hard working hausfrau. They encouraged my brother and I to study hard, and read read read. We were only ten, however,  a troll attack on the outskirts of town took our parents from us. My brother and I were then taken in by our Aunt Gypsy, who raised the both of us with a strong sense of faith... and a heavy dose of mysticism. My brother went on to train and become a historian, he and I... had a falling out, and we really don't speak anymore- in all honesty,  I don't even think he acknowledges to other ponies he even has a sister. As to me, I entered the religious life- becoming an acolyte at age seventeen, and achieving my flowing mane of enlightenment by twenty.

Being this city's clergy is a very rewarding experience, though; there is always someone who needs the help of myself or my acolytes. Our Mondays here are full of blessings and visits to the sick and elderly, our Tuesdays full of marriage counseling appointments and teaching religious classes. The cathedral is always full for my sermons, and the lay ponies are always around to help out at holy functions during the holidays Yes, I am quite happy with my congregation here in Misty Mountain, they are always so passionate and devout in everything they do!

I must say, you certainly chose quite a quiet time to come through here- we don't have any Horsemasterist saints feast days coming up, and our Ocktoberfest celebration is already behind us. Oh, I know! Let me take you around town tomorrow, and I'll show you where to get the best gifts, meals, and pastries. Why, my fiance just happens to own a cheese shop over in the west side of the city, maybe you could stop there on the way back to the hostel you're staying at in town. If you had come just about a month later, you could've been here for our Weihnachten holiday celebration. The lighting of the holiday candles- one each week leading up to the holiday itself- the visit from the Christmas giant, who brings all the little children of Misty Mountian all kinds of wonderful toys and presents.

Huh? Wait, one of my Acolytes wants to tell me something. Oh, I am truly sorry, but it seems a most pressing matter is calling me. It appears Fraulein Tootsie's candy shoppe is possessed by a poltergeist, and they need me to go and perform an exorcism. Please, dear pilgrim, go ahead and light the fire to make your offering and prayer. The acolytes will clean up after you're done. Good luck on the rest of your pilgrimage journey, and may great B'zekre watch over you, in all that you say and do! Guten nacht!

Interlude: Musings on Pony love

Rainbow Ponies series: Glowing Moonstone

Rainbow Ponies series: Glowing Moonstone

Greetings, most honorable guest! I am pleased to have you here at my shrine, as it not often we recieve guests from beyond the walls of Hoofkaido.  It is a beautiful building, is it not? A magnificent red pagoda, with such a lovely zen garden, and that Torii gate outside the entrance. The faithful leave thier prayers on small scrolls written in kanji, hopeful that thier prayer requests will be awnsered by B'zekre. Horsemasterism has it's own special flavor here in hoofkaido, with many diffrent kinds of meditation and prayer rituals, combined with-

Oh, I am so sorry, I am truly ashamed I did not introduce myself first. My name is Moonstone, and I am  the rainbow monk of this most humble and venerable community. I sense you are on a pligramge across the Cofederacy to all the horsemasterist shrines,  and hope you will find your visit here to be  spiritully rewading experience. This blue mare with a ringed planet cutie mark grew up in this very city, and most humbly requested upon the compeltion of my monastic studies that I be allowed to return and serve the town of my birth. I have always felt the spirit of the horsemaster moving in everything around me, and I was mos happy to be called into her divine service.

Oh, you're wondering about that reliquary up on the high altar? Oh yes, that hold the bones of Princess Luna, the great alicorn who is seen as the proctector of the night here. Oh, I am well aware Luna is not a recognized horsemasterist saint- let alone the fact she wasn't even a horsemasterist, period- but our faith teachers that the alicorns are specially chosen to guide ponykind, elevated to enlightnment by B'zekre, wither they know it or not. The ponies of Hoofkaido have long felt a connection to the moon above, and so on the night of the Lunar festival will come before this altar, and offter thier veneration and petitions before this shrine to the spirit of the moon.

Yes, I myself have felt a connection with her, as well. As a little filly, I always felt more alive at night, when the lovely moon above was shining down upon me. The daytime is like an unfriendly stranger, so I ususally sleep though it's bright and burning light, if I am able to. I leave the sunrise services to my acolytes, and see to the nocturnal ceremonies and functions. I just love composing haikus that sing the praises of Luna's beautiful night, as well as painting wonderful watercolors in the Hoofkaido of the starry night sky.  I can almost feel the princess's presence when I meditate near the lunar altar, as if she were standing there before me.

We have tried many times over the centuries to return these bones to New Equestria, but they always angrily rejected them. I suppose they didn't want to believe thier beloved princess was dead, and even the rest of Ponyland still believed that Luna was out there somewhere. But North Star and Wind Whistler's encounter with the ghost of Luna, has led to the bones being authenticated as hers. New equestria now wants the remains, so they may join Celestia's bones in the crypt at the great alicorn temple in thier capital. But now... it is hard for Hoofkaido to let go of one of our most sacred treasures. Even if we do not worship her, the princess of the moon has watched over this city for so long.

How did we come into possession of these relics, you ask? One of our monks, who had been in Canterlot during the seige, actually witnessed the final battle of Equestria's alicorn of the night. But instead of describing it, good pilgrim, I'll let the monk tell you in her own words. Here, on this parchment, is her own personal account of that traic conflict, preserved by our temple here in Hoofkaido. She had stayed in Canterlot to minister to the few remaining ponies, and was fortunate enough to be witness to history...

... the city had already been evacuted, and all that remained was Luna and a small detachment of her personal guard. Everything was quiet for a few minutes, and then suddely, they were upon us. Goblins poured over the walls- setting fire to every house, business, and stucture in the capital. Canterlot was ablaze all around us, as the ememy poured through the streets. Those few bat ponies met the goblins, and for every equine that fell, five goblins perished. But thier numbers were too great, and Luna's guard perished under the invaders crude clubs and axes.

As I watched from hiding in an alleyway, the great alicorn princess landed in the street nearby. I could not hear the words she spoke as the vile Grogar trotted up to her, but it provoked the goat tyrant to such a wrath that he charged at her in a blind fury. The combat was most furious, with energy blasts from both combatants tearing through the city. Great magics rocked Canterlot that day, and both Luna and Grogar were thown back many times. As the battle wore on, both fighters were covered in the blood gushing from thier wounds. But both also looked determined to carry on the fight, and thier screams and roars filled the surrounding countyside for over an hour as the two duled.

But the fight finally came to a point, where it appeared that Luna would emege the victor. But the tyrant was not known for playing fair, and two of the dragons from Grogars army unleashed the full fury of thier breath upon the distracted lunar princess. The dragon fire coming of each side melted the very stone in the street underneath her, and throwing up a magical shield strong enough to block the intense heat drained the last bit of Luna's magical reserves. Grogar charged at the exausted Princess, goring her on his twisted and grarled horns. Suddenly, the moon above turned blood red, and the alicorn led out a death howl that chilled both myself and the goblins to the core. Grogar held the mangled corpse up over his head, even as her glittery mane and tail ceased to flow. It was at that moment, that my heart sank within my bosom.

Princess Luna, great ruler of Equestria and beloved alicorn protector of the night, was no more.

The beast lowered his head, and unceremoniusly dumped the grisly remains on the broken street beneath him. I wanted to cry as I saw the mutilated princess- bits of bone sticking out from benath her torn and bloodied fur, a burgundy stain slowly spreading on the ground beneath her. Grogar stepped back from the body, and his goblin army rushed forward, eager to feast on the fesh meat that lay before them, as they had been stripping and cleaning the bodies of those poor unfortunate bat pony soldiers. Moved to action, I risked my own life by leaping forward from my hiding spot, and crying out "STOP!" in defense of the princess's remains.

"Please, mighty Grogar!" I pleaded. "Allow me to take her remains back to Hoofkaido, where she may be respectfully laid to rest!"

The goblins began to rush towards me, but the goat tyrant raised a hoof to stop them.

"Let the monk have her body for burial, so that ponydom may know it's protector is gone." Grogar hissed. "I shall not have a rumor spread amogst the equines that she still lives, for that may inspire a sliver of foolish hope!"

And so, I was permitted to gther up the bloodied carcass, and sucsessfully trasported it from the burning remains  of Canterlot. Wrapping the corpse in a cloth for transport back to Hoofkadio, my acyloytes and I clean the remains, and bury the softer portions after a solemn ceremony. Her bones we placed in a trasluscent casket the color of the Princess's coat, beaing her cutie mark on the side.

It is our hope that after the conclusion of the war it can be given to the Alicornists so they may lay thier goddess to rest. But for now, I have decided to keep these remains a secret, so that Grogar's plan to destroy ponydom's hope may yet be thwarted...

A terrifying Proposal

Minty the cursed

Minty the cursed

"Oh Minty, Minty, Minty!"  They always say to me. "How come you always mess up stuff so badly?"

I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I really don't mean to!

I didn't mean to set Skywishes's kite collection on fire! I didn't want to break Sunny Daze's roller skates! These things just kinda happen!

I mean, I try really really hard not to mess up, but I always seem to bump into everything, and knock everything over! Ohhh, why does the whole world have to be so fragile, and everything my hoof touches breaks like it's made of glass? I am as careful as I can be, but everything I get near seems to break apart into a million crackly pieces! I just want something to go right for a change!

Can't I go one day without something going wrong? I take Scootaloo's scooter out for a joyride, and I end up running it off the road, and sinking it into Ponyville lake! Or when Applejack is holding a picnic in Ponyville park, I break Junebug's ant farm on the ground, and everybody goes running in every direction covered in the nasty little buggers! Oh why oh why is it so hard to do anything right?

And the worst part is, everyone always gets mad at me when this stuff happens! They all act like I was actually trying to do some of this stuff! It's all totally accidents, I swear! I would never go around and wreck everyone's stuff on purpose! I know Kimono is going around saying I have might have some kind of 'latent hostility' towards the other ponies in Ponyville, and all my oopsies are me acting that out. But it's just not true! I love all my Ponyville friends! I'd never do anything to hurt them! But the world seems really intent on hurting me!

Even when I try to do something nice, it backfires! Like that bowl of chili I made for Spike, that was so spicy that it made him spit fire for three hours. Or when I tried to go to unicornia, I was helping to string up lights for the illumination festival- I got poor Brights Sprightly and Lilly Lightly all tied up with as string of lights to a lamp post! And when I mixed up that rainbow berry juice for Sweetberry's party... how was I supposed to know the berries were spoiled? Everybody had the trots for two days, and it's all my fault!

Maybe it's just that I was born cursed. when I was a little filly, Momma Minty tripped on a toy I left out, and fell and hit her head... she hasn't woken up since. In ponymentary school I was pushing Sparkleworks on the swing, and I accidentally pushed her all the way over the bar and she hit her head!  In art class accidentally spilled paste all over Toola Roola, and in music class I accidentally bumped into Tinka Tinka Too when she was playing a Kazoo, and she accidentally swallowed it! Oh, I was even a klutz back then!

Even my love life's messed up! One time I went on a date with Seaspray, and when I kissed him, he got sick cause he was allergic to my raspberry glitter lipstick! The town's stallions won't even come near me, 'cause they're all afraid they'll end up in a full body cast like Frisco did! I'll never get married and have a foal... and even if I did, I'd probably drop him on his head when the nurse first handed him to me, or accidentally put him into a clothes dryer to dry him off!

None of my friends or the other ponies ever come right out and tell me they don't want me around, but there are little hints. Babies cry whenever I try to hold them, other adult ponies say a silent prayer when they ride beside me on the Ponyville roller coaster. I have a little cemetery out behind my house for all the pets I forgot to feed or water. Even the flowers Wisteria and Daisyjo give me occasionally wither up and die within a day, just to get away from me. Why do I destroy everything my hoof touches?

Why is fate so mean to me? Why do I always manage to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory? Why can't I, just once, make a loved one laugh and smile, instead of running away and screaming because I got their hoof caught in the blender? I'll tell you why- it's because I'm cursed! Doomed forever to have everything go wrong, I can't have a single day go by without me triggering some kind of natural disaster, and the only thing I manage to do is bring pain and suffering to the ponies I call my friends.

That isn't right...

That's no good...

I'm no good.

Nobody really wants to play with me, or spend time with me, or even talk to me. If they weren't just trying to be nice, I'd probably be all alone.  I've heard them arguing behind my back

"Do we really need to bring that klutz along?"

"I don't wanna end up with my coat dyed plaid again!"

"There is no way I'm having that green goofball over at my house again! Sparkleworks still hasn't gotten done repairing it from the last time!"

And they really don't like it when I do my favorite stuff, like when they got mad at me for painting the entire town green. green is my favorite color, after all! Or when I give them socks for their birthday, I see them throwing the socks in the trash can when they think I'm not looking. It's okay, I understand not everyone likes what I like. At least they're trying to spare my feelings, right?

Even if they won't admit it, Ponyville would be better off without me. It's only a matter of time before I accidentally blow the town to smithereens, or get it washed away in a catastrophic flood.  I really should get out of here, before I actually get some pony killed, instead of just sent off to the hospital. Ponyville would be better off without a mare like me, and things wouldn't get so screwed up so often. Maybe just for once, maybe I'll get the courage to do the right thing, and go to a place where I cant hurt them anymore. Maybe I should just get up, and try to leave town forever again.

No, I could never do that, not while there are still a few ponies who really do care for me. Thistle Whistle likes me, that frightened Pegasus once braved her fear of clouds on a cold Christmas eve just to rescue me once. And Pinkie Pie... pinks is always the one who stands up for me no matter what happens! She's the one who forces the others to not give up on me, even when they really should! I wish I could be as good a friend to them, the way they are to me. Maybe next time I'm a klutz, I'll actually do something right when I mess stuff up. Maybe next time, I'll just do everyone a favor... and break myself.

We have returned, part one

The Christmas Pony

The Christmas Pony

It's that time of year again, the time when I go all over Ponyland, spreading holiday cheer to all of the equines of the confederacy, and taking sheer joy in giving of toys to all the good little colts and fillies. The goodwill and hope this season brings, warms my heart and soul in the coldest and bitterest of winter nights! It's my job to make sure that all ponies have a gift on this most wondrous of nights, and My preparations for my magical journey on Christmas eve consume most of my free time the entire rest of the year. I fly across the sky at the speed of thought, making my way from home to home as I leave a special gift for all the equines who look forward to my annual visit.

Oh? Did you think I was the jolly elf in the red suit? Oh no, I'm not Santa, he sees to all the humanoids in Ponyland. No, my name is Felicdades, and I am the magical earth pony who is responsible for the Christmas cheer for all the horsemasterist ponies in the world. If you have have been awake late at night on Christmas eve, perhaps you have caught the glimpse of a white mare with a red and blue mane out of the corner of your eye. I move at a different pace than other ponies do when I am at my task, so I'm not seen much. Still, the little ponies are always very grateful for the gifts I leave them under the tree, and usually show their appreciation by leaving a glass of milk and horseshoe-shaped cookies out for me before going to bed at night. Oh boy, do I have a tummy ache when I get home in the morning!

Originally, I was just a simple pony from Maretonia, a sweet little filly who just loved giving gifts to others. But when I discovered my green bow with crossed candy cane cutie mark, I knew it was my destiny to become the Christmas pony! After training under the last holiday mare, I now live here in the Christmas grotto, a town filled with the little pixies and breezies who make toys for all the children of the races of Ponyland. But our home does not stay in one place, oh no! for this town is picked up and carried about on the back of the mighty Christmas giant, who takes us from place to place around the world. That way, those who wish harm upon Christmas can never find where our toy factories are. You would not believe how many villains are out to destroy the most happy holiday for all of Ponydom!

It might seem like a thankless job, but I love the happiness my gifts bring to all the ponies of Ponyland. Through some unknown power, my toymaker Yewi mystically knows what every pony in the land wants. He's the one who can figure out that that pink Pegasus from Dream Valley wants a stallion pin up calendar in her stocking, or that the white pony with balloons on her butt wants a new bag of whoopee cushions, rubber chickens, and other pranks under the tree. Every stallion and foal has a different thing they want for the holidays, and my main man is the one who knows what's on the Christmas wish list.  He gets the pixies and breezies to make what every pony wants, and then gives them to me to deliver them. The fairies who build the toys are wonderful, too... their craftsmanship is unmatched by even the greatest Ponyland  toy makers. My yearly journey would be far less special.

In the same fashion, I'm the one who inherently knows which ponies are naughty or nice. It's my place to tell which ponies deserve the gift they want, and who gets coal in their hoof stockings. It's something that I really can't explain- I don't even know what a lot of these ponies have done! But it just instinctively comes to me which ponies have been good and which foals have been naughty.  Just like a lot of the Christmas magic, even I really don't know how it works! But I also can't explain how an earth pony like myself can fly across the land, let alone how I deliver a toy to every pony in the confederacy in one night. But perhaps it is better that way, the mysteries of Christmas remaining a magical mystery. The holiday would be a little less magical if everything was laid out and understood for how they work. It's one of the many things I enjoy about this holiday, that is so incredibly tied to my special talent.

But as great as my connection to this holiday is, there are parts of Christmas that even I don't care for. For me, all these holiday parties and get-togethers are something I have to watch from the outside... remember, I spend all of my time running around seeing to other pony's Christmas wishes, my wishes aren't really part of the equation. All the family and friendship and happiness and spirit of the season is something I really don't have the time for. How I wish someone would invite me to take part in decorating a Christmas tree, or give me a present, or even just wish me a Merry Christmas. I mean, sure, I love the appreciation ponies have for my hard  work in bringing Christmas to them. But once in awhile, I wish I was more than just the messenger of Christmas cheer to Ponyland.

Oh well, the time of my annual sojourn is nearly here, and I must go and prepare for the time ahead. I must go and load up my magical saddlebag, so that I can make every other pony's dreams come true for this year. You know, I wonder if other ponies, who so love things like Christmas trees and bright colors and ornaments during this holiday, realize how common place they are for those of us who live with Christmas day in and day out? I live in a town devoted to the most wonderful time of the year, so I don't see it as special as the rest of you do. It would be nice to have, just once, something to make Christmas wondrous for me again. Oh well, have a happy holiday, everyone! And be sure to look under the tree for my handiwork tomorrow morning! Farewell!

They have returned, part two

A Christmas Vision

A Christmas vision

It was the holiday season, and the snow was falling all about the land of ponies. Everyone and everypony was getting ready for  the season- stringing up lights, decorating the tree. But though all of the ponies across time and location were united in all of this joy and warmth and light, the ways in which they celebrated this holiday were as varied and colorful as the lights and decorations that lit their homes and hearts.

In the ancient halls of old Ponyville, Rarity and Applejack decorate the town hall with ornaments,  the earth pony lifting and carrying the heavy boxes, and the unicorn fashionesta levitating the bulbs and garland onto the building itself. Both were wrapped up in their preparations for hearth’s warming eve, that they weren’t even paying attention  to the ponies who had gathered around to watch them.

“Applejack, darling, I can’t thank you enough for helping me get these decorations up!” The white unicorn told her, tying a bow on the top of the town hall with her magic. “I simply wouldn’t have been able to do this on my own!”

“Awww, it twernt nothing, pardner!” Her friend replied, pulling a bunch of tinsel out of one of the boxes with her teeth.  We better hurry up and git the town hall finished, though. Ah reckon we don’t have much time to git the big Ponyville tree up before this year’s pageant is supposed at start!”

“You ask me? I think all your dumb decorations there look really lame!” Diamond Tiara called out, standing among the gathered group of ponies. “Personally, I think mayor mare shouldn’t have chosen you two to decorate the town hall at all!”

“Yeeeah! You two shouldn’t have decorated!” Silver Spoon giggled in agreement, backing up her bullying friend as always.

“Agreed! So why don’t the two of you stand aside, and let a pony with a true flair for the dramatic light up the hearth’s warming celebration!” A blue unicorn declared, trotting up behind the entire group assembled. “Surely, the grrrrreat and powerful Trixie, can do a better job of giving the holiday flair!”

“What? Why should we give up a job Princess Celestia appointed us to do, darling?” Rarity snapped back, glaring at the other unicorn. “I think we’re doing a pretty good job, as is!”

“Yeah, certainly a better jawb than an ornery braggart could do!” Applejack agreed, stamping her hoof, and staring the three heckling ponies down.

“Actually, I think you should all work on the holiday decorations.” A voice called out, as a regal white alicorn trotted up. “This is the season for friendship, after all!”

All of the ponies present went wide eyed at the sight of Princess Celestia, bowing low before the taller mare.

“Y-your highness!” Rarity Stuttered, looking up at the ruler of Equestria. “W-what are you doing here!?”

“I was dealing with some royal matters in the area, and I thought I might stop by to see how your decorating was going.”  The regal rainbow-haired monarch replied serenely. “And I’m surprised to see the lessons of friendship don’t seem to be sticking among ponies who should know them all too well.”

After a few words of apology were exchanged between the ponies present, and soon all the equines in Ponyville were assisting in putting ornaments on the tree. Going over to one of the boxes of the colorful decorations, the alicorn looked inside, and gazed at a large golden orb that stood out from all the red and blue spheres inside. Looking at the small translucent sphere curiously, Celestia levitated the small ornate bauble up, and gazed into a small translucent window on it's side.

That's strange... The princess thought to herself, and she looked at the small scene that seemed to be carved into the inside of the ornament itself. It almost feels like somepony is somehow looking back at me...

...

"Hey Minty, would you please put that Christmas ornament down, and come over here and help us?"  Sunny Daze asked, glaring at the distracted green mare in annoyance. "We could really use an extra hoof, in getting this tree up!"

The clumsy mare tore her gaze away from the bauble she was gazing at, and looked back at the other ponies, who were helping to put up the town's tree.

"Girls, you won't believe this, but I think there are ponies trapped in that ornament over there!" Minty exclaimed, galloping over to her friends. "We gotta help them!"

"Ponies? Trapped in a Christmas ornament?" A nearby pink unicorn asked, rolling her eyes at her earth pony friend's suggestion. "Really Minty, but you need to stop with all of these wild and silly stories!"

"I dunno, Cheerilee." Rarity replied, the little filly hopping around excitedly as her teacher levitated decorations onto the nearby Christmas tree. "I think it'd be amazing to find a bunch of ponies trapped in a little ornament! We could break em' out, then sings songs, bake Christmas cookies..."

"Ohhh, and hang Christmas stockings! Don't forget about the Christmas stockings!" Minty exclaimed excitedly, joining the other pony in hopping around. "I wonder if the the trapped ponies like green ones?"

"Trapped ponies... wow, you two dudettes really do have big imaginations!" Sunny replied, helping the other earth ponies to raise and steady the one-of-a-kind-here-comes-Christmas-candy-candy-cane into place. "Now Minty, be sure to stay away from this thing. We don't need another repeat of last year's Christmas!"

"Well, I think there really are ponies inside that ornament!" Rarity replied, picking up the bauble. "I wonder if there's another little filly in there who wants to play with me..."

...

"Mama! Y'all come here, quick!" Baby Heart Throb called out, staring into the open window on the ornament she was holding in her wings. "I think there's a filly inside here that wants to play with me!"

The ponies of Dream Castle, who were setting up the giant Christmas tree in the great hall, all looked back at the little filly who was holding the bauble.

"Oh, little one, such fantastic tales y'all tell!" The elder Heart Throb laughed, as she and Fizzy strung the tinsel on the tree. "Ah wish I'd had such a vivid imagination as y'all when ah was yo age!"

"Wow, a little filly inside the decoration? That's so cool!" Fizzy giggled, staring down at the bauble in the little filly's hooves. "but wow, she must be really tiny to fit in that thing!"

"Oh, Fizz, there's no one inside that thing! You're old enough to know that!" Moondancer scolded her goofball friend, and she used her magic to unpack one of the boxes. "To even think such a thing is an immoral crime against reason!"

"Be careful how you use that phrase, Moondancer! There are a lot of things in Ponyland- heck, within the walls of this very castle- that defy so-called reason." Magic Star offered, her cold form trotting up behind the talking ponies. "According to reason, I shouldn't even be u and walking around without a pulse!"

"Yeah, but I don't think there are little itty bitty ponies inside a little teensy-tiny ornament like that!" Surprise told them skeptically, as she flew over Tex's head with a sprig of mistletoe. "that's be even too much of a Surprise for me!"

"Yeah, but ya'll caint tell, honey darlin!" Tex declared, grabbing the giggling Pegasus out of the air with his oves, and pulling her to the ground. "aftar all, Christmas is the season fer miracles!"

"But do you thing the pony in there would like to sing Christmas carols with us? Or open presents?" Fizzy asked curiously, looking into the glass bauble as Tex kissed Surprise behind where she stood. "I mean, I'm pretty sure she's wanna come out here, and have fun with us, not stay cooped up in that tiny lil' place!"

"Ah got an idea, Fizz! Why don't you keep an eye on the little pony inside, while we work on the tree and the decorations?"

"Hey, that's a good idea, Fizzy. Surprise can even help you." Magic Star agreed, trying to hold back a chuckle. "It'll be just like having your own pet!"

"Wow... hey, you're right!" Surprise exclaimed, zipping over to look inside the bauble with Fizzy and baby Heart Throb. "I wonder what teeny tiny little ponies eat..."

...

The three dream valley ponies looked into the bauble, and the the ponies from all different times and places gazed back upon them. Minty saw the three ponies from the future. And the future ponies the green mare from the past. And it wasn't just these them, either- other ponies saw them all, and each other, as well.  In Coltonville, a young mare named Clover saw them when she was putting an ornament onto her family's Christmas tree. On another world, Sunset Shimmer saw the ponies and the world she left behind in an decoration hanging in a mall store display. It filled her heart with the warm memories of a world she may never see again, and also filled her with a twinge of regret.

And far, far back, at the center of it all, a white alicorn gazed at all these ponies and more. And though she did not know the origin of this vision, nor it's meaning, a smile spread across her face, to see so many of what she thought were her little ponies happy.

"Happy Holidays to all." Princess Celestia said softly, in a voice heard through out all time. "And to all, a good night."

Minty speaks o' the Green

A look back, and a look ahead

A look back, and a look ahead

The end of the year, a quiet time to reflect. I often enjoy these quiet moments, in between the goblin attacks and evil villain plots to conquer Ponyland. This brief time after Christmas is done, and the dawning of the new year, is a reminder that time flows far to fast in this weary old world of ours, and in the blink of an eye one can go from being an energetic young foal with their whole lives ahead of them, to an old and grey pony with more life to look back on than ahead. each new year is a chance to reflect back upon what once was, and to look ahead with both hope and dread at what lies ahead to come.

How much did we all here at Dream Valley truly accomplish this year? Was Surprise truly fulfilled in all of the whoopee cushions she put on people's chairs, was she truly satisfied with every banana peel she threw down that another pony tripped on? Does Fizzy feel satisfied with all of the sodas she gave to all of the satisfied customers at the Satin Slipper?  What about Paradise, reading her fairy tales in the library, and dreaming her days away? Does she even realize how quickly time is passing her by? Does Moondancer, during her rants about preserving the upright and proper morals of Dream Castle, see that this year just quickly filtered away like sand in the hourglass? Did any of us really grasp how precious what little time we have really is?

Look, my whole point is... when we follow our special talents, and do the things that the marks on our flanks have told us to do since birth... are we really doing anything meaningful? A pony's youth cherished by so many, is here and gone in an instant, and a pony's life is over in less than a century. I watched this whole year simply race on by... I remember last Christmas as if it were only a moment ago!  Are  we so terribly busy going about our terribly important business, top stop and realize how we're wasting our lives on things that are inconsequential. When I was but a foal, I never understood what the older mares and stallions meant when they said that youth was wasted on the young. But now, I do... oh, great B'zekre, do I finally grasp what they meant.

Dear readers, your life is a precious gift from the horsemaster, the years allotted to each of us so tragically few. Think back on all you have done this past year... your accomplishments, your mistakes, your successes, and your failures. Did you spend some meaningful time with your family or friends? Did you do do something or go on a trip you've wanted to do your entire life? Were you happy with your decisions, or do you feel that you wasted those days that this past year gave you? Did you make those moments of your life, moments you can never relive and never get back, count? Regret is the one curse that will come to haunt you in the later years of your life, and a lifetime of mistakes is indeed the bitterest pill to swallow.

My advice to all of you, then? all of those ponies I have written of in my works, from Majesty to Firefly? Be like them, and not like me. They are ponies who live in the moment, whose hearts are full of joy and happiness. They don't let themselves be troubled by thoughts such as these, so busy are they enjoying playing games with friends, and living their lives to the fullest. Gusty shows no fear when looking to the year ahead, and Sweet Stuff looks to the friends she will make in the twelve months to come with a warm hope, and a gentle smile. Take in every day in the coming year with an eager zest for life, and never waste a moment in regret or worry about the small details. Don't be like the stallion historian  who buries himself in the past, and in wallowing his pity and self-loathing and regret lets flitter away the precious thing he so values- his own short life.

My wish for the new year for all of you... is that you live all that you possibly can. Go take that trip to fort Rainbow Dash, go see the temple and gardens in Hoofkaido.  All of your excuses are as worthless as all the smooze in grundleland! Ask that very special somepony to be with you all the days of your life. Cast aside that fear of rejection- which is worse, a few days heartbreak over rejected love, or a whole lifetime of loneliness from never asking? This year will be your year to shine, and know that I am rooting for you and your success!  This unicorn's time is nearly over, and my mistakes and wasted time can never be recovered. But for all of you can make happy and wonderful lives for yourselves. And on this coming new years day, when your eating your New Years cabbage with the other members of your herd... well, perhaps you will think of the advice I gave you, and smile at the realization of all the good things you have in the year- and the lifetime- ahead. If I can even make that much of a tiny difference, then perhaps all of my wasted years really weren't wasted, after all.

May you all have the happiest New Year, my pony friends. And I hope to see you again in this amazing New Year to come!

Tornado Firehooves

Dream Castle Historian

Another day in Paradise, part one

Another day in Paradise

"Paradise! I thought Majesty told you to clean up this library! Nobody's been able to find anything in here!"

"Paradise! Where's that book on practical jokes I asked you for?!? Fizzy and I want to pull a really neat prank on Shady!"

"Paradise! Weayah is thait book on Mustagian teas? Ah need a good recipe cause my mama is visitin;' tommorah!"

"Paradise! I need a book on harmony bearer Fluttershy's work with animals for a school book report! You promised you'd help me find it!"

"Paradise!"

"Paradise!"

"PARADISE!"

All day, every day, Good old Paradise- our pony community's resident Pegasus Librarian, is always grabbing books and completing tasks for the eager patrons who require my services. A book on thermodynamics for Wind Whistler, a book on the great escape artist Horsedini for Locket, or the newest Romance novel for Heart Throb. And when I'm not getting books for them, I am cleaning off these ancient and dusty shelves, or filing, or cataloguing the new books coming in or being  thrown out in the discard pile.

Mind you, this isn't a totally bad thing for me. Books are my special talent, after all- I love the smell of dusty tomes, love the feel of those yellowing pages under my hooves. But it is fantasy stories are my favorite subject,  tales of enchantment and wonder. Wizards and witches, handsome princes and damsels in distress, enchanted swards and fearsome fire-breathing dragons... these are the wonderful tales I grew up on.

My friend Twilight and I, we both love reading these fantastic tales, and every Sunday we take over the library on my day off to read these exciting stories to each other. One day, we're searching through an old haunted house, trying to uncover the mystery of why the poor pony soul is trapped there. Another day, Twilight and I are brave shield maidens, clad in armor and fighting our way through a horde of goblins armed with sword and shield. Reading these books are an escape from the ordinary, and let's the two of us feel extraordinary.

But while Twilight loves the magic aspect of fairy tales, for me it is the sense of wonder. Other ponies ridicule me for how much I believe in the fantastic- I love human world concepts of Bigfoot, aliens, and the Loch Ness monster.  But why is it so hard for them to believe in the improbable? I think the idea of some of these far-out concepts exciting. And besides, to most of the humans of the other world, intelligent, talking ponies whose numbers include Pegasus and unicorns are an improbable things that don't exist? Yet here we are, in defiance of all those dumb skeptics and their dumb skepticism. What do those stuck up sticks in the mud know, anyway?

But these books, they and thier stories are what I live for.  Why even now, I'm reading this latest adventure book from fort rainbow dash, about amare who survived an airship crash far out at sea, and must survive in a wild untamed wilderness woth only her wits and whatever tools she can find to protect her. With a few minor tweaks, her story becomes my own, and I am quickly immersed in this exciting tale as I read on...

I'm off in the hot and steamy jungle; a humanoid pony girl, alone and trapped on a tropical desert island. Armed with only a spear,  four weeks of living on the edge of this island have reduced my clothing to a primitive tribal skirt and top. Realizing I finally need to explore the island, I hack and slash my way through the undergrowth, avoiding dangerous predators and perilous pitfalls. As I make my way across the island, I see smoke rising from a clearing, and hear strange chanting, following the sounds, I soon arrive at a village full of natives.

Ohhh, they are a fierce bunch- a group of savage earth ponies, their faces covered by tribal markings, feathers decorating the rings around their hooves. Scanning the village, I see them all standing around a pot of boiling water, chanting "walla walla willa walla", while roasting the poor pony trapped inside.  But when I learn in closer, I see the poor Pegasus they captured is none other than Trucker,  Four Speed's  twin brother (whose only marked difference is his wings) that disappeared on a sea voyage months ago! Thinking quickly, I cut free a vine from the tree I'm sitting in, and swing down to pull him out of the boiling water.

"Are you okay?" I ask, as I heroically swinging the stallion back to safety.  "Those Neanderthals hurt you?"

"No time!" He yells in a panic, pointing a finger back at the angry savages rushing towards us.  "We got company!"

Our wings too soaked from the water, the two of us race towards the beach, the army of savages in hot pursuit. Spears and blowgun dart whiz past our heads, as he can feel their hot breath on the back of our necks. It isn't long before we reach the beach... and the two of us realize that we're trapped.

"Oh, no!" The white stallion clad in nothing but a loincloth- a skimpy, ab-revealing loincloth wet from the water he had been boiling in (*pant pant pant pant pant pant pant pant*) wailed. "We're trapped, what are we going to do now?!?"

"Don't worry!" I declare, standing in front of him, raising my spear at the oncoming  tribal horde. "I'll protect you!"

The nearest savage raises his weapon, and is about to strike, when-

"Paradise, could you come help me? I can't find that book on astrological forecasts for the coming year!"

Oh dear! We'll have to continue this later, duty calls! Sigh, why can't Galaxy find her own astrology book?!

An Ace at sports

An Ace at sports

Ugh, what is wrong with these ponies? Can't they see how awesome I am? I just won the whole football game for Coltonville high, and they're all lifting Patch up over their heads, and carrying her off the playing field like she's some kind of hero! PATCH! Okay yeah, she did makes that last kick that scored us the point and won the game, but if it hadn't been for my careful planning and strategies, we wouldn't have scored a single point during this whole game! Why do I even waste my time playing for these worthless ponies when they can't even see greatness when it's right in front of them?!

Oh yeah, sorry... name's Ace, all-star athlete, and Coltonville's greatest hometown sports hero. You know, the handsome stud with the golden mane and coat in the front row of Miss Hackney's class? Yeah, as you can tell from the football on my flank, I'm the awesomest pony at the sport in like... the whole pony world! (Except in dumb old Dream Valley, where they degrade my favorite game by calling it soccer!) I'm going to make it to the professional teams after I graduate, and one day I'll play against the Equestrian teams in the big leagues! Yes sir, my future is totally made for me, and I won't even have to lift a hoof or worry to make my dreams come true. Man, life's so totally awesome for a pony like me, isn't it?

I know, you've probably seen me hangin' with my two best buds, Teddy and Lancer. Yeah, I know, why would an awesome pony like me lower himself to waste his time with a barbaric bully and an egg headed nerd? *Sigh* The sacrifices a star must make to help his friends out. The truth is, I'm the leader of that little group, and those poor misguided fools would be lost without me. Lancer would be lost without one of his precious textbooks to tell him what to do, and Teddy's temper is so short he'd probably start fighting with himself if he didn't have a cool head to keep him in check. I would be surprised if they would start fighting with each other, if good old Ace wasn't around to guide them by the hooves.

Still, I have discovered that having Lancer's brains and Teddy's brawn around can be useful... when it suits my purposes, that is. The fillies and colts at my school are so easy to manipulate, I can get whatever I want out of them  with the right cunning, charisma, and charm. Make them think you're important, and make them think you think they are important, and you can have any pony eating right out of your hooves. I can convince any colt that I'm their friend, getting them to jump of a bridge if I want them to. And I can also charm any filly, sweeping them off their hooves and into the sack before they even realize what happened.

Speaking of which, yeah Starlight and her little band of fillies. I don't really think much of em', a bunch of average  babes. Bon Bon  is a really good cook, despite being a fatty. And Bright Eyes is even smarter than lancer... though she's the ugliest out of the seven.  Clover might be a little pretty, if she weren't such an awful and clumsy klutz. Still, they're pretty easy to get stuff out of em' when you want to- a well-placed compliment here, a wink and a toss of your pretty-boy mane there, and it's like taking candy from a foal.

And besides, I've had my turn with most of them, anyway. Bagged Bon Bon under the bleachers prom night of junior year, and I wooed Starlight beneath Miss Hackney's desk during a late night study session at the school after the faculty had left. I sang a sweet tune with Melody under the Rockin Beats' practice stage, and Patch was such a klutz she almost tripped over and fell while we were- ugh, I don't wanna even think about it. There  are a few 'don't touch' fillies, like Teddy and Lancer would kill me if I laid a hoof on Bright Eyes or Sweetheart, and Patch responded to my charm with a hoof to the groin- yewouch! Still, those fillies are the exception to the rule, as I can get almost any other female in this school I want!

See, the thing is that all these ponies, when it comes right down to it, are actually morons. You smile and wave, you tell them what they want to hear, and it gets thier guard down. stuff they normally wouldn't do for anyone now suddenly makes total sense to them as the right thing to do, and a small suggestion can go a long way in getting what you want out of 'em. Ponies think you're the greatest friend to come along since Twilight Sparkle, and they'll bend hoof over heels to make you happy. Why the hay should you fight and struggle with someone over something you want, when you can simply get them to up and give it to you? Man I tell ya, the ponies of Coltonville can be so damn dumb it hurts!

Anyway, nothing changes the fact that when it comes to popularity, I rule this school! Why I could own all of the colts and stallions here with my left hoof, and eat a bag of potato chip with my right.  It doesn't take much to get what I want in Coltonville, it all just depends on having the right touch. Oh shoot, that new filly who transferred in from the isle of Pony just trotted by, time to go work my magic! Hey Pigeonsmall, wait up! Wanna go to the skating rink together?

Aw Yeaaaahhhhh, I still got it!

Rainbow Ponies series: Flutterbye by night....

Trading Places, Conclusion!

Trading Places, Conclusion!

Cheerilee looked around at the chaos her new saddle had wrought at the Rainbow Falls trading bazaar, trying to find a solution that would restore everyone- and everything- around her, to a semblance of what ponies would consider normal.

"Oh dear... ummm... gee, what can I.... maybe I could- no that wouldn't work... perhaps I could..." She thought aloud frantically, as the sun sank slowly in the west behind Rainbow Falls. "Oh no! Time is really starting to run out now! What the hay am I going to do?!"

Even as the pink pony paced the trading grounds, two humans came out of the background, and stood behind the mare, gloating at her misery.

"Awww, look at that, is the poor widdle pony out of ideas?" The fat human with a pot on her head gloated. "Looks like  all of your widdle pony friends are gonna be stuck like this, forever!"

"Ha ha!, yeah! your friends are really and totally doomed!" Her skinny sister goaded the pink pony. "How does it feel to be responsible for all the horrible things that have befallen your fellow ponies?"

"Reeka! Draggle! Stop wasting your time, talking to that useless equine!" Hydia barked hopping up on her broomstick. "Now, go get your brooms, and let's fly on outta here!"

Reeka... and Draggle? Hydia's two stupid daughters? Cheerilee thought to herself, as a small smile slowly began to creep across her face. Maybe there is a way out of this, after all...

"Yeah, yeah, we're comin'!" Reeka grumbled, as the two began to walk away. "We were just havin a little fun. Hold onto your horses, mom!"

"I said MOVE IT, you two! RIGHT NOW!" The old hag roared, firing a lightning bolt on who two daughters, who immediately dove for cover. "And I've told you never to called me MOTHER!"

"Hey, why do you two put up with that kind of treatment from her?" Cheerilee asked the two, as they crawled out from their hiding spots. "A mother shouldn't treat her daughters like punching bags, just because she gets mad!"

"Yeah, why do we put up with Hyida's crud?" Draggle growled, as she and her sister looked up at their mother angrily. "We do all the hard work in these stupid schemes, and all she does is bully us!"

"What?! Why, how dare you talk back to your mother like that!" Hydia barked, shaking her fist at the two younger women on the ground. "You two brats are so incorrigible! How I wish you were both more like me!"

"Oh yeah? Well, I wish you'd just turn into a big, ugly old toad!" Reeka snapped back, pointing a finger at her mother. "I'd trade anything to make that happen!"

"All right then, I trade you both of your desires, in exchange for all these trades being declared null and void!" Cheerilee blurted out quickly, just as the last rays of the sun vanished over the horizon. "So long, Hydia!"

What? NOOOOOOOOO!" The witch wailed, as she realized she and her daughters had been outsmarted. "Damn you, you blasted ponyyyyyyyyyyyyyy-!"

*POOF!*

Suddenly, every pony present was restored to normal- Surprise ceased to be a pizza,  Hollywood was restored to her flutter pony self.  All of the ponies looked around, thankful the chaos was finally over.

"I never wanna be that close to fireworks again!"  Locket sighed, looking down to make sure she was still all there.

As all the ponies celebrated their return to normal, three ugly toads tried to hop away from the scene, but were intercepted by a trio of angry mares.

"So... Hydia and her two brats." Surprise grumbled angrily, stepping into the three escaping amphibians' path. "Looking a little green around the gills, aren't we?"

"You really went over the edge this time witches, torturing us like that with your little cursed saddle." Buttons snorted, her eyes filled with rage. "And it occurs to me, that an artifact like that probably drained nearly all of your magical energy- meaning, you're powerless."

"You've killed hundreds of ponies, Hydia... you murdered Princess Cadence, tried to turn Flutter Valley into a lifeless wasteland, and unleashed the smooze on Ponyland and Grundeland." Locket's jewel eyes looked down on the three toads with the coldness of an executioner. "This time there will be no forgiveness, this time there will be no escape!"

"Urrrrrrrrkkkkkkk!"

STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP!!

The three ponies leaped on the toads, trampling them into a gooey mess beneath their hooves. At long last, the witches of the volcano of gloom, the terrors of Dream Valley for so many years, were finally gone.

"Well, that was certainly an interesting day of trading!" Cheerilee said with a nervous laugh, as the last of the magical power flowed out of her saddle, and it crumbled to dust. "But I think I'm ready to go home to Dream Valley now!"

"Yeahhhh, but we'll be back again to trade next year!" Surprise replied with a laugh, flying up next to Cheerilee.  "Let's just hope things don't get as crazy next time!"

The pink pony smiled at her friend. "Now that's a hope I'm willing to trade for!"