Generic Millitary fic

WARNING: THIS IS STILL CANON

"SOME BODY ONCE TOLD ME ABOUT THE ECONOMY AND HOW IT WAS GOING TO SHIT, AND THAT DIDN'T SOUND VERY GOOD SO I FIXED IT." Shrek whispered peacefully to Princess Celestia.

"Yo dude that twizzniggle totes broke my PS TRIPLE what should I do m8" Prences Celelei asked.

"Kick the bitch-ass nigga's bootay into tomorrow you cheeke cunt." Sherk replies.

"OK." Celestia said.

In a blinding yellow flash Princess Celestia made haste in following the heretical Twilight Sparkle; whom had previously destroyed her totally rad modded PS3 she got for cheapies from a friend. After crashing through the shutters of her bedroom window she totally chased after Twilight with wicked rad Alicron flying speed. It was so wicked rad that all of the females in the general area instantaneously became pregnant and then gave birth to wicked rad children that started playing air guitar the moment they came out of their wombs. So yeah, pretty goddamn rad.

"Damn son, that's pretty rad." Shrek said.

Realizing that all this radicalness being displayed by Celery was totally making him look like a nerd, Shrek decided to show off and help out as well.

Using all of his willpower, Shrek summoned forth a mighty winged Donkey wearing some pretty sick pointed retro shades pulling along a wicked cool onion chariot.

After hopping onto the chariot with the grace of a swan, Shrek let out a mighty roar and commanded his trusty steed to quickly close the gap between himself and the filthy PS3-destroyer.

As the chariot soared through the skies onions rained down upon the foolish mortals dwelling on the ground; causing a large amounts of tears to be shed and heads to be bashed in. A little filly could be seen watching from below with irritated eyes and an onion in her hoof. Anyone close enough to hear her speak would hear her say "Thank you based Shrek." in that very moment. For it was a glorious moment.

Truly an amazing event to behold.

Anyways they totally caught Twilight after chasing the Alicorn to her current place of residence; also asking people if they could spare some change for gas and seeing the sights along the way.

"Yo m8 why the heck did 'ya bust muh ps3?" Celestia asked.

"Sorry m89s I just needed to get your attention don't worry it wasn't your real ps3 i replaced it with a fake one, here's your old one." Twilight said, levitating the old trusty PS3 to Shrek.

"But why did you need our attention?" Shrek asked.

"I was wondering if you guys have heard of the PC master race. If you would join us we would gladly engage in many fun games with you." The purple Alicorn replied.

Shrek and Celestia looked at each-other and nodded.

"Sorry man, we only play video games casually, and the only games we really want to play are available as either multiplats or PS3 exclusives. We don't really intend on joining the master race anytime soon, but I'm sure we will eventually." Celestia said, a smile on her face.

"That's absolutely fine and I respect your decision even though I don't agree. Sorry for the trouble." Twilight responded.

"It's cool man." Celestia and Shrek said, afterwards returning to the cool kidz castle.

"Damn, they're so rad." Twilight said as they flew off into the sunset.

THE END

AFTERWARDS SHREK AND CELESTIA GOT MARRIED, HAVING SEVERAL HALF ALICORN - HALF OGRE CHILDREN

TWILIGHT SPARKLE REALIZED THAT SHE WASN'T RAD ENOUGH AND ENDED UP COMMITTING SUICIDE AFTER BATTLING DEPRESSION FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS

ADOLF HITLER CAME BACK TO LIFE, BUT THEN REALIZED THAT HE'S ACTUALLY KIND OF A DICK AND WENT BACK TO BEING DEAD. HE ALSO SCUFFED SHREK'S GUCCI SHOES SO SHREK CAME AND BEAT HIM UP FOR BEING A FUCKING COMMUNIST.

GENERIC MILLITARY FIC

A STORY BY KRAGOR

"I JUST WANT SHREK SENPAI TO NOTICE ME."

THANKS FOR READING M8S