The Frosted Pie

by Grey Faerie

Rating: teen
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Sex, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1129

Pinkie licks a frosting spoon.

Pinkie licks a frosting spoon. Then dreams about it.

Marginally improved, but hey, it's a crack fic. What else do you expect?

Proofread by Keam.

Published 2014-04-22 19:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-22 19:00:02 UTC

Oh my gosh, what am I doing? Why am I writing this?

Pinkie loved her dreams about frosting. They were the best ones! She thought about it as they prepared to fight the vines.

How did it all start? She thought. They made her drool but she thought back to it.

It all started in the kitchen one day when Pinkie felt all alone and bored. She was doing dishes after a long day of cooking cupcakes and cookies and other goodies. Some of the pans needed extra scrubbing from baked on batter. She left some of them on the counter with water inside to soak. Pinkie boredly looked over for the next dish and there it was sitting in its bowl. She picked it up. Pinkie eyed it up and down. So long and smooth. There was still white cream at the top.

Pinkie's lip trembled. Her eyes widened. Her mouth moistened. She opened it and lapped out her tongue.

Ahhh, frosting.

She sighed heavily after lapping up a large glob of frosting. Pinkie never go to lick the frosting spoon before. Her parents never let her do it when she was younger and the Cakes always put it in water the moment they were done with it. She felt it was such a waste. But now, she had a chance. She stuck out her tongue again.

The creamy vanilla frosting coated the spoon so thickly. She dragged her tongue across its smooth surface. The white substance stuck upon her tongue, lighting up her senses. Its sweet mellow taste and smell excited her and more drool came out. A moan escaped her throat. She swallowed. She lapped at the spoon until all too soon, it was done. Pinkie pouted. She put the spoon into the soapy water.

That's right. She was cleaning up. She scrubbed at the remnants of the deed till it was all gone. She held up the spoon to look at it. It had to be her favorite utensil of all.

Quick footsteps came closer as Mrs. Cake popped in. ''Pinkie? What are you up to?''

''Umm, nothing." she resisted shifting her eyes around, "Just dishes.''

Mrs. Cake tilted her head, "You seem very focus on that spoon.'' She commented. Pinkie hadn't realized she had clutched it to her chest.

''Yeah, it's just...very dirty.'' You dirty, dirty spoon. She put it back into the water and scrubbed it a bit. She rinsed it off then put it with the other dishes in the rack.

''Okay. Just finish up quick. I'm making dinner soon." She smiled.

She turned back out of the room to leave Pinkie to her work. Pinkie looked back at the spoon. Oh, the things this has started.

Pinkie tossed and turned in bed. Her mind was wild with images...

The land was all icecream. Every flavor imaginable and some unimaginable but she loved every one of them. She slid across the rocky roads to the moose tracks. She stopped to follow where they went. The land became softer under hoof while the air slowly became moist. She hopped on the tops of cupcakes like a fish in a jellyfish bouncing race.

She reached a sort of center clearing. The flying butter sticks put a cape of red velvet around her shoulders. A crown of cherry was placed on her head. They flew off to a waterfall. Pinkie laughed as she followed. Caramel drizzled from a cliff to sink to the bottom of a bowl. She walked around the bowl to a mountain side.

There was something at the top of the mountain. The climb was treacherous. Chocolate chipped from boulders and morsel mice nipped at her hoofs. There was a tree in her path. She bucked at its almond bark until it gave way. There was a shining at the top. It was right in front of her.

The silver spoon stood in a bowl of pink icing. Pinkie was in the bowl. She eat the frosting out of her belly. It went down her throat and back to her belly. She was made of frosting. She giggled. The spoon giggled back.

"Oh frosting spoon." Pinkie swooned. She held it close to her chest. She nibbled on the tip. Her tongue lapped out. Frosting spewed from the spoon like a never ending supply. She laughed with joy. Licorice stick ponies danced around the bowl, holding hands. They had red vines as big happy grins.

Pinkie's eyes cracked open. She was splayed out on the bed every which way. She was very warm and happy. But as the dregs of sleep slipped away, she felt very cold. Pinkie pulled the covers back over her but alas, they were cold as well. She looked at the clock, 7:24 am. Pinkie sighed. Might as well get up.

She walked into the bakery kitchen a while later.

"Good morning Pinkie!" Mr. Cake called out.

"Morning!" Pinkie cheerfully said back, "Hey Mrs. Cake, what're we making today?"

"You're just in luck. We have a large order for an icecream cake." She said as she arranged the licorice.

"Ooo, does that mean..frosting?" her mouth watered.

"Of course it does."

"Awesome!" Pinkie skipped to the back.

The day was done so it was time for dishes again. They did dishes at certain times throughout the day to keep up with the need for clean bowls and utensils. Pinkie filled up the sink with water and soap. She then wandered over to a bowl with another bowl in it. She lifted up the smaller bowl.

"Hello, frosting spoon." She reached down and grabbed it. It still had the gooey goodness on its surface.

She took a moment to appreciate this wonder. Then she put her mouth on it. She moaned, it was so good.

"Thankyou thankyou. I really wanted this." she said.

"Wanted what?"

Pinkie choked a little on the spoon. Mr. Cake walked backwards into the kitchen.

"Ah, um, I was relaxing."

"I thought you were doing dishes?" He put down a box of ingredients.

"I am! I like the feel of the warm water." She had stuffed her hooves into the water, sadly, along with the spoon. The Cakes didn't like her eating the frosting out of the jar anyway, so she didn't want them to think she was doing something she wasn't supposed to.

"Oh, that's nice. I like settling down with a cup of tea. The warmth feels nice."

"Yeah!" Pinkie mentally shoos him away. She wanted to be alone with her thoughts.

It took him too long for Pinkie's taste to leave. But, she thought morosely, there was nothing left to do but the actual dishes. Maybe tomorrow.

Author's Note

I think I've spent too much time reading plotless yaoi fics.