Chapters Everything is Not Awesome
"We are from the planet Duplo, and we are here to destroy you."
"Oh man"
A mysterious alien group known as the Duplo had just appeared from what seemed like a giant blue laser originating from a glowing multicolored flower hovering in the sky. These "Duplo" looked like they were made from Lego bricks, except these bricks were much larger than the standard brick, and more brightly colored. These aliens were poorly placed together, with multiple poorly matched bricks forming together to create inconsistent patterns, and creatures who were shaped at awkward angles.
On the opposite side of the mysterious invaders, there was a group of random Lego people who seemed to have originated from multiple regions of the Lego Universe. In the front there was Emmet, a construction worker with neatly combed hair and a standard set of construction clothes. To his right, there was a pink cat with a blueish horn on her head, Princess Unikitty, a Man in a business suit with three brown blocks for his hair, President/Lord Business (he prefers president), and a floating astronaut in a blue spacesuit and cracked helmet, Benny. To Emmet's left, the was a girl in a black hoodie who had black hair some a blue and pink dye in the front, Wyldstyle, and Man in a black bat costume, Batman, and what appeared to be a floating ghost with a headband and a strange staff, Vitruvius. Lastly, towering over everyone else, there was a strange robot pirate hybrid known as MetalBeard.
Everyone on Emmet's side had confused looks on their faces. Who were these mysterious aliens? Where did they come from? Did they actually just say "We are here to destroy you"? Millions of questions were going through there heads.
"Um, the invasion starts now." said the Duplo alien. As soon as it said these words, thousands of odd shaped Duplo started blasting themselves into the surrounding area via blue lasers.
"Cover your butts!" yelled Vitruvius, as the floated out of the way of a blue laser. The rest of the Lego people followed soon after, just narrowly avoiding a laser heading straight to them. They all then proceeded to try and find some cover, mainly from some pieces of destroyed skyscrapers.
"No, my city!" cried President Business, "My beautiful city!"
"Come on guys, we need to stop these guys! MetalBeard, I need you to distract them while we get organized!" shouted Emmet.
"Aye aye me laddie!" replied MetalBeard. He jumped out from cover, and proceeded to assault the Duplo with a flurry of cannon balls and sharks.
"Unikitty and Benny, I need you guys to start evacuating the people from the city!"
"Okie dokie!" replied Unikitty.
"I'm on it!" followed Benny. The cat and the spaceman took off to get the citizens of Bricksburg to safety.
"Batman, go join up with the other super hero's and help save the helpless citizens"
"Awe yeah, lets go bust some bricks!" shouted Batman.
"Wyldstyle, go get good cop to help us out! I'll stay here and help MetalBeard!"
"Be careful Emmet!" shouted Wyldstyle as she took off.
Emmet then grabbed some Lego bricks from a nearby imploded tower, and built a giant grey laser cannon, then proceeded to fire at any nearby Duplo unfortunate enough to be in front of the red death ray. The next couple of minutes were filled with explosions, lasers, and thousands of destroyed Lego bricks.
"Keep up the pressure guys, they're starting to let up!" said Emmet.
It had only been a couple of minutes, but in that time, half of the city was in ruins, and most of the citizens had retreated to the surrounding areas. The team of mismatched hero's had been fighting off the alien threat with everything in their power, and the Duplo were losing numbers.
"We can't do this!" cried one of the Duplo, "We're almost out to soldiers!"
"Don't worry, help is coming shortly!" replied another one.
"Whoa, hold on a sec, did the just say help?" said Benny.
As Benny said that, hundreds of bright yellow shooting stars started raining down from the skies. These weren't regular shooting stars however, these stars, just like the lasers from earlier, seemed to be carrying more aliens, and caused even more damage to the once magnificent city.
"What the? What the heck are these meanie mean falling stars of meanness?" said Unikitty.
When the "stars" landed, some white horse like creatures clad in golden armor arose from the craters. What was odd about these creatures is that they didn't seemed to be made of bricks like everything else. These creatures had rounded corners on their bodies, which was absolutely foreign to the people of the Lego universe.
"Arr, what be these strange creatures?" questioned MetalBeard.
"We represent the ponies of the great nation of Equestria, and we demand that you surrender immediately."
"Oh yeah!" said Wyldstyle, "You and what army?"
As soon as these words came out of Wyldstyle's mouth, hundreds of more of these "ponies" joined with the ringleader. They literally all looked the same, the same white coat and golden armor.
"Awe come on!" yelled Batman.
After a couple more minutes of fighting, it was safe to say the Lego people were losing this war, the enemies, or rather enemies, had far more soldiers than the rest of Bricksburg. The half of the city that wasn't destroyed had followed the same fate as the surrounding buildings, and were reduced to piles of grey rubble.
"Emmet!" cried Wyldstyle, "We can't keep this up, they just keep coming!"
"But the city! We can't just let them destroy everything!"
"I know, but we can't take them all out!"
Suddenly, a bright white orb of light came down from the sky. The pony soldiers immediately stopped whatever it was they were doing earlier, and just stared at this mysterious object. When the orb had reached the ground, a extremely tall white pony with brightly colored hair and tail that seemed to be sparkling. Judging buy the crown on it's head, Emmet could assume it was some sort of royal figure.
"Guards!" said the new pony, "What are you doing to Emmet's city?"
"Um..." meekly replied one of ponies, "Well... um... sort of destroying it..."
"Do you have any idea how long it took lord business to build this?"
"Yeah, but-"
"No butts. Now leave this city alone."
"Yes princess..."
Then, the guards started leaving the former city. The Lego people just stared in awe as the ponies just gave up, and left without saying another word. After they were gone, the citizens were left with piles of rubble and former sky scrapers.
"Well now what?" asked Benny.
Author's Note
Just a heads up, this is my first story, so try not to be too harsh. However, constructive criticism would be awesome.
Everything is Not Awesome
Upstairs, above the ruins of Bricksburg, lies a family of four surrounding a table filled with various Mexican cuisine from Taco Time nearby. The little boy at the table, Finn, who had curly hair which puffed out of his head along with dark hazel eyes, was crying his eyes out.
I know what you're thinking, "How can this kid be crying on Taco Tuesday. Taco Tuesday, dude!" Well if you'd give me a second, the situation will explain itself.
"This is totally unfair mom!" cried Finn, "How come Emily get's to just destroy all of my stuff!"
"Yeah!" said Finns dad, a tall man with shorter curly hair and blueish grey eyes, "I spent like, three weeks building that city!"
"Boys, calm down." replied Finn's mom, a Blond woman with bright blue eyes.
"Yeah guys!" said a little girl with blond hair in two pony tails, and blue eyes, "It's not like it's that big of a deal. You can always just rebuild it!"
"Easy for you to say!", Finn was screaming at the top of his lungs now, "How would you like it if I went to your 'magical' kingdom of Equestria and destroyed all of YOUR stuff!"
"You wouldn't dare harm Twilight Sparkle!"
"Oh yeah, says who?"
"That's enough, both of you!" said the mother, "Finn, you are not going to lay a finger on Equestria, your sister and I worked too hard on it."
"And Emily, you are no longer allowed in the basement." said the dad.
"But mom!" cried Finn.
"No butts Finn, now eat your dinner." replied Finns mom sternly, "It's taco Tuesday, your favorite."
Finn then stuck out his tongue towards his younger sister, then proceeded to take about out of his taco. Normally, these crunchy shells of awesome would cheer him up, but nothing was doing the trick for him today.
Later that evening, all of the citizens of Bricksburg were working on rebuilding the obliterated city, which was going quite quickly with the help of President Business's Micro Managers. Meanwhile, Emmet was on the top floor of Octan Tower, having an argument with President Business.
"But President Business!" whined Emmet, "We should go and attack their stuff, I mean, they went and practically blew up all of Bricksburg!"
"No Emmet." replied President Business.
"But why not! You have access to their world!"
"Because Princess Celestia said no."
"So? She's not the boss of you! You could totally overrule her!"
"It's much more complicated than that, Emmet."
"Come on, President Business!"
"Emmet, no means no!"
"Uh! Fine!" yelled Emmet in defeat, as he stormed out of the room.
But not without taking the Key-Chain of Unlocking from on of the many pedestals in the room. If President Business wouldn't help him, he would just get the rest of his friends to help instead.
Meanwhile, in Cloud Cuckoo Land, the Master Builders were also having their own arguments within their usual gathering place.
"This is an outrage!" cried Cleopatra, "These ponies should be punished for their crimes against the Lego Universe!"
"Thy hast a point, Cleopatra." said Shakespeare, "Thy ponies crimes mustn't go unnoticed."
"Yo, me 'an the boys totally agree with all you guys," said one of the 2003 NBA all stars, "But all I'm saying is that we 'ain't got no way of 'gettin in their world. And even if we do, what happens if we get spotted by that princess of theirs?"
The rest of the room erupted in argument again, as Michelangelo fought with Michelangelo, and as the Caveman started hitting random area's of the room with his club. Emmet's friends were all trying to calm things down, but everyone else seemed bent on revenge.
"I may have a solution!" announced Emmet as he walked proudly into the room. Everyone hushed as the Special came into the room, because he was the greatest, most interesting, most important person of all time, and you know this is true, because this rhymes.
"And what is your said, 'solution'?" questioned Abraham Lincoln.
"Here's the plan, when President Business goes to sleep tonight, my friends and I will sneak into their little 'kingdom' and totally blow up their stuff!"
"But how will you get in?" asked the Mermaid.
"Yes, nobody has the key to get in." said Dumbledore.
"Do you mean this key?" said Emmet, as he pulled out the Key-Chain of Unlocking from earlier. The entire audience gasped at the sight before them. Unikitty's jaw literally hit the floor.
"Got it right here, as you guys can see." said Emmet, "I only have one question for you." He then turned towards his friends.
"Are you with me?"
"Good night Finn." said Finn's mom as she tucked him in.
"'Night 'mum." replied Finn.
Finn's mom then went to the door and turned of the lights, before closing the door behind Finn. As he heard his mom's footsteps become more distant, Finn turned on his bedside lamp, and fished out a large blue spaceship from underneath his pillow, which contained all of his little friends he needed to complete this mission.
"It's go time." whispered Finn.
Everything is Not Awesome
Finn slowly crept down the hallway with a large Lego spaceship in one hand, and a flashlight in the other. When he made it to the end of the hallway, he pulled down a long piece of string from the ceiling. From there, a small set of steps slowly descended down onto the floor below. At the top of the steps, there was a hatch which was locked earlier in the evening, but luckily, Finn had the key (The Key-Chain of Unlocking).
"Here we are guys," said Finn towards the spaceship in hand, "The attic..."
"All right everybody, listen up." said Emmet, "In a couple of seconds, we'll be in the dreaded kingdom of Equestria to get our revenge on these dumb ponies."
"SPACESHIP!" shouted Benny."
"Shush!" said Wyldstyle as she placed her hand over Benny's mouth, "You don't want to wake up President Business or Princess Celestia, do you?"
"MMMMHHHMMMM!" came Benny's reply.
"Um Lucy, could you keep Benny quite until we exit the 1980 something spaceship?" asked Emmet.
"Uh, fine." sighed Wyldstyle as she rolled her eyes in annoyance.
"Excellent! Now, here's the plan guys-"
It was a quite night in Ponyville, with the entire town sleeping peacefully under Luna's beautiful moon. Inside a large tree house near the center of the town (a legitimate house carved inside a tree. The owners got game), there lied a purple alicorn in a bed across from a basket containing a small purple dragon.
Unfortunately for them, the peace and quite was going to be short lived, for a storm was brewing.
"BANG!"
Suddenly, the purple alicorn stirred underneath her blanket.
"Uh. Spike... did you hear something?" mumbled Twilight Sparkle.
Spike, still sound asleep, didn't reply to Twilight's question.
"Probably nothing then..." said Twilight, as she was about to head back to sleep.
"BANG!"
"Okay, I defiantly heard it that time." said Twilight, as she got out of her bed, and made her way over to a nearby window to see what was going on outside.
She didn't make it however, because her tree house was suddenly lifted out of the air, and tossed towards Rarity's boutique.
"What the- AHHHHHH!" cried Twilight.
"Wow!" shouted Unikitty, "That was a superly awesome throw Mr. MetalBeard!"
"Aye, thanks lass!" replied MetalBeard.
"Keep up the good work guys!" shouted Emmet, he then started talking to the radio in his hand.
"Benny, you almost at the castle? Over."
"SPACESHIP!"
Just when he said that, a giant blue spaceship flew right through Canterlot, causing to tumble onto the ground, and shatter into pieces of broken plastic.
"Over." said Benny.
"Holy cow!" yelled Batman, "That was so AWESOME!"
Equestria was under attack by a small band of Mysterious forces, who had already destroyed Canterlot's castle, and were currently rampaging through Ponyville, trying to causing chaos wherever they went to in this small, quite village. Houses were being turned upside down, nearby carts were being thrown around, and no one (or no pony) was doing anything about it!
In a couple of minutes, these invaders had already laid waste to both Ponyville and Canterlot, and they were now making there way over towards the city of Manehattan.
"That was so AWESOME!" said Wyldstyle.
"I know, right?" said Emmet, "Nothing can stop us now! Victory shall be ours!"
Suddenly, the same white orb of light came down from the sky again, except this time, Princess Celestia was accompanied by the one, the only, President Business.
"Emmet!" cried the princess, "What have you done?"
"Uh..." mumbled Emmet, "Well, sort of... getting Revenge on these stupid little ponies for destroying Bricksburg..."
"No! This is uncalled for! Also, they're not stupid!"
"But Princess!"
"No, now go back to Bricksburg!"
Emmet and his friends grabbed their belongings, and made their way back towards Bricksburg. On the plus side, they did just destroy two whole cities, so in a way, they sort of won.
By the time Emmet and his friends had left Equestria, President Business turned towards Princess Celestia.
"You know, you didn't need to be so tough on him. He was probably still upset about Bricksburg."
"He went and destroyed both Ponyville and Canterlot, what was I suppose to do."
"To be fair, Twilight did destroy all of Bricksburg, every brick in the system was disconnected."
"But you two rebuilt it easily, but I cant just 'rebuild' all of this! Now, I have to go and buy new houses and buildings for my little ponies."
"Did you actually just call them little ponies? I mean, seriously?"
"That's irrelevant!" yelled Celestia, "What we need to worry about is rebuilding these cities!"
"Alright, fine. But we're going to talk about this some more in the morning, alright?"
"Fine."
The two leaders of their respective worlds then got up, and made their way out of Equestria, with Celestia having a look of sadness from all of the destruction caused by Emmet and his friends.
She was going to have to sit down and have a very serious talk about this in the morning.
Author's Note
Busted.
Everything is Not Awesome
The next day wasn't a great day at all, as no one in the family said anything to each other besides the usual "good morning" or "what's for breakfast", since the memories of last night were still fresh in their minds. The two children didn't speak a word to each other, unless you count angry death glares as words, then they were talking a lot.
After the kids were on their way to school, the father turned towards his wife, who was trying to enjoy her morning coffee in peace.
"Honey..." said the dad.
"Yes dear?" replied the mom.
"We... uh... sort of need to talk about yesterday."
The mother placed her cup of coffee on the table, before letting out a long, exaggerated sigh.
"I know, I know..."
"What are we going to do about the kids, they can't seem to get along without destroying each others stuff."
"I don't know honey, but I'll think of something."
"You sure?"
"Yes dear, have a good day at work!"
The father didn't say another word as he left the house, and after he close the door, the mother began to drink her caffeinated beverage in silence. Today was going to be a long day...
After school, Finn and Emily threw their backpacks by the door, before marching over to the kitchen for their after school snacks. However, they were greeted by their mother before any of them could grab a bowl of delicious Doritos.
"Hey guys, how was school today?" asked the mother in a cheery voice.
"Uh..." replied both the kids in unison. They weren't really expecting their mom to be in such a cheery mood after last nights events.
"Good..." came Emily's response.
"Excellent!"
"Hey, uh, mom?" asked Finn.
"Yes dear?"
"Why are you so... how do i put this... happy? I mean, I thought you would be super mad at us..."
"Why, it's because of the new arrangement I made for you two?"
"Arrangement?" the kids asked in unison.
"Yes, And I suppose you are wondering what it is."
The mom then cleared the throat before continuing.
"You see, I believe you two should learn to play along together, so I've made a mandatory little 'Play Time' for you two, where both of you have to play together nicely for at least one hour every day. Isn't it exciting!"
The kids mouths were agape after listening to what their mom had just said. Playtime? Together? An hour? Everyday? Together?
"You can't be serious!" came Finn's reaction.
"I'm serious, Finn."
"But I cant even stand to be around Finn for like 5 seconds!"
"Well, we're going to have to change that, right sweetie?"
"Uh!" shouted Finn, "This is the stupidest thing ever!"
"Now now sweetie, it isn't that bad. It's only an hour a day."
"But still!"
"No butts, now I want you two to go and grab your toys, and play in the living room, nicely."
"This is so stupid!" shouted Rainbow Dash, "They destroyed our hometown, and we have to get along with them?"
"Ah hear 'yah, Dash." came Applejack's reply, "Them stupid 'lookin blocks give me a bad feeling."
"I know what you mean, darling." said Rarity, "Why do we have to get along with these ruffians?"
"Because," answered Twilight, "The princess say's we have to."
"What!" shouted Pinkie Pie, "Even after they ate all my cupcakes, and then threw Sugar Cube Corner at the town hall?"
"Yes Pinkie." said Twilight, "I don't like it much either, but if we don't the princess would banish us for sure!"
"Um, Twilight," whispered Fluttershy, "I'm not really sure the Princess would do that..."
"Okay, so maybe I exaggerated just a little bit." replied Twilight, "But the result still wouldn't be good! I mean, do you girls really want to find out what happens if we don't?"
The ponies all shook their heads.
"Great, so here's the plan, we play nice for now, and after a while, the princess will probably lift the punishment, and we can go back to playing in Equestria!"
"All right, let's do this!"
"Ah'm in."
"Me too, Darling."
"Okie dokie lokie!"
"Um, okay..."
A couple minutes later, the ponies had landed in "The Neutral Zone", a zone owned by neither Lego people of ponies, and had exited out of their golden chariot. They were currently waiting by some sort a river.
"Uh, this is taking forever!" shouted Rainbow Dash, "Why are these guy's so late? I mean, the sooner we get this over with, the sooner I can start practicing my new tricks for the Wonderbolts!"
"Hold on, here they come now!" yelled Pinkie Pie.
Just then, a extremely large pirate ship being piloted by some sort of giant robot pirate pulled up on the shore, shouting "Arr, we be at the destination!". Then, a plank connected to the ship landed onto the shore, and out came a group of Lego peoples.
The two groups gave each other mixed looks for about a minute, until Twilight decided to speak up.
"Um, hello! I'm Twilight Sparkle, and these are my friends Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Applejack, and Fluttershy."
"Hi, um, I'm Emmet, and these guys are Wyldstyle, Batman, Benny, Princess Unikitty, and MetalBeard."
They then spent a minute awkwardly trying to avoid eye contact, and occasionally kicking the dirt, while Rainbow Dash glared daggers at Wyldstyle, and Fluttershy hid behind Applejack. It was pretty clear that neither one of them wanted to be around each other.
It was going to be a long day.
Everything is Not Awesome
"So, um, what do you guys do for fun around here?" asked Twilight.
"Crush poni-" mumbled Batman.
Emmet quickly covered Batman's mouth before letting out an awkward sort of laugh.
"Ha, oh Batman, you kidder!" said Emmet, "We sort of just, well, build stuff."
"Oh, I love building stuff!" shouted Pinkie excitedly, "Waddya build? Do ya build houses, or castles, or carts, or bikes, or cupcakes, or-"
"Pinkie, that's enough." said Twilight.
"Anyways!" said Wyldstyle, "As Emmet said we build stuff, we're Master Builders, so we can make pretty much anything."
"Master Builders? That's a dumb name." mumbled Rainbow Dash.
"Arr, and Rainbow Dash aint? Ye dumb be stupider then ye look." replied MetalBeard.
"Hey, watch your tongue, mister!" shouted Rarity.
"Or what? Ye gonna bore me to death, 'cuz that already be working, lass!" shouted MetalBeard in retaliation.
"Hey, y'all better watch yerself!" said Applejack.
"You guy's better be playing nicely!" shouted Princess Celestia from out of no-where.
The two groups let out a sigh of defeat, before turning back to each other.
"Look, if you guys are so good at building stuff, why don't you go and build a giant castle or something?" challenged Rainbow Dash.
"Whoa, hey, is that a challenge?" asked Benny.
"It sure is!" came Rainbow Dash's reply.
The group of Lego people smiled at each other, before Emmet said "we'll be right back." and they all ran back into the pirate ship, and took off at an alarming speed. The six mares just gave each other confused looks.
"Um, did that pirate ship make a screeching sound as it flew off?" asked Fluttershy.
"Ah think it did." came Applejack's reply.
"How does that even work?" shouted Twilight in confusion, "I mean, boats can't make screeching sounds, they're boats!"
MetalBeard's pirate ship came back a couple minutes later, except it was hauling a giant plastic container with Lego brick's overfilling through the top. It made the same screeching sound as it came to a stop, and out came the cast from earlier, except this time, Emmet was carrying a set of instructions.
"Alright guys, we just follow these little instructions I made, and we should have ourselves a castle in no time!" shouted Emmet in excitement.
"With that amount of Bricks, it'll take hours to make!" shouted Applejack.
The Lego people just laughed with each other, before tipping over the container, spilling grey bricks all over the place, and started making the foundation for the castle.
"Batman, pass me that window!" shouted Wyldstyle.
"Heya MetalBeard, could ya please put that giant gate right here, please?" said Unikitty.
"Benny, start putting these flag's over there!" shouted Emmet.
After a few minutes, giant stone walls were resurrected around the minifigures, displaying the base of a very large castle. It had a square shape, with a turret on each corner, and a large wooden gate on the front.
After the castle was built, the Lego people posed in front of it, with Emmet going "ta-da", at the end.
The ponies stood there, jaws dropping to the floor after witnessing the event unfold before them,
"So..." said Emmet as he broke the silence, "What do you think?"
"How did you do that?" shouted Rainbow Dash in a frustrated tone, "That's not even possible!"
"You kidding?" asked Batman, "We do this all the time back home."
The two groups once again, stood there in silence, until Unikitty finally spoke up.
"So what can you guys do?"
"Um, well, all sorts of stuff..." replied Applejack.
"Like?" questioned Batman.
"Oh, oh, oh!" shouted Pinkie, "I can throw awesome parties!"
"Really!" replied Unikitty, "Me too! Well, Cloud Cuckoo Kingdom is kinda one big party anyways!"
"Heya, we should totally throw a giant party sometime!"
"Yeah, we can have streamers, and confetti..."
"And cake, and balloons..."
"Alright Pinkie, that's enough." said Twilight.
"Yeah, that was pretty lame..." said Batman.
"So, has it been a hour yet?" asked Rarity.
"Well, I think it has!" shouted Emmet in excitement, "Same time tomorrow?"
"Um, sure..." responded Twilight.
The minifigures quickly said goodbye, before climbing onto the pirate ship, and shooting off with the same screeching noise from earlier.
"Seriously!" shouted Twilight in frustration, "How do they do that?"