Fleur de Lis and her traveling companions (Maud and Cream Pie) visit the City of Lights

by Uncle Knot

Rating: everyone
Tags: Fleur de Lis, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Maud Pie
Length: 2229

3 filies go on a shopping trip in the City of Lights (aka Paris), but something more is happening than just dress shopping

Fleur de Lis, Maud Pie, and Cream Pie have a little adventure in the City of Lights. But wait, they are being followed, and they don't know who.

Published 2014-04-20 05:10:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-20 05:10:04 UTC

Lost in translation

The skipper of the airship ‘Argyle’ adjusted the controls as the craft made a final approach to the airfield. His 3 passengers stood at the rail peering down upon the city of lights. The city certainly deserved her name for in the early evening hours every window shared a warming light and the streetlamps illuminated each boulevard for miles about.

The 3 passengers at the rail ‘oh’ and ‘awe’ with approval at the sight below, even though one was a native. Fleur de Lis had ‘borrowed’ the airship and her crew from Fancy Pants. Her two companions were an unlikely mismatch; the dour Maud Pie and her cousin Cream Pie. Whatever had prompted Fleur to bring them along on an impromptu shipping trip completely baffled the skipper of the Argyle.

Fleur, Maud, and Cream hailed a taxi upon touchdown. Then checked into a ‘little’ hotel in the 12th quarter, called La Belle Maison.

“Belle Maison, doesn’t that mean pretty house?”

“Oui Maud” responded Fleur

“But it is so big” said Cream

“Zat’s because it is a four star hotel, we can eat dinner in ze restaurant or order room service to bring some zing up to ze room”

“Really, I think the restaurant sounds okay” said Maud “We are just too excited to stay in our rooms and sleep”

“Great, I would like omelets au fromage”

“Ohm - lettuce - oh - fro - marge?” asked Cream.

“Oui, ‘omelets au fromage’” repeated Fleur “but don’t say zat in the catacombs tomorrow. I accidentally did last time and a secret door opened unexpectedly.”

“Cat combs?”

“Catacombs, the city of the dead beneath the city” said Maud “I think your pet will like it Cream”

“City of the dead, with cats? Luna doesn’t like cats”

“No cats, the catacombs were built to keep the dead cool until a burial could be arranged, many never got buried because there were more dying from the plague than the grave diggers could handle.” said Maud “So this is why the catacombs keep getting bigger and bigger.”

“Why did you name your pet ‘Luna’?” asked Fleur “In honor of the princess of the night?”

“No, I got the idea for the name before Princess Luna returned. I just thought that Luna would be a great name for a bat. But wait till you hear what Maud named her pet rock”

“Bolder” interrupted Maud

“Because he is fearless and brave?”

“No, because he is a rock”

“Oh” said Fleur

“So do you, Fleur, have a pet?”

“Oui”

“Some kind of puddle, right?

“No”

“What’s its’ name?”

“Fancy Pants”

“Wait, What?”

“You named your pet after Fancy Pants?”

“No, Fancy Pants is my pet. I have taught him all sorts of tricks, like ‘lay down’, ‘beg’ and ‘roll over’. I give him treats when he is good, and scold him when he is bad. I take him out for walks to social functions and art galleries and he gives me spending bits”

“So you are like his pet too?” asked Cream

“Do you put him on a leash?” asked Maud

“When you fillies get stallions of your own, I promise to tell you” answered Fleur

Cats & Clerks

The next day, the 3 fillies took a taxi to the Hotel de Ville.

“Are we moving?” asked Cream

“No, ze Hotel de Ville is how you say, city hall”

“Why are we going here?” asked Maud

“I have a package to pick up and then we are off to ze catacombs”

“Package to pick up? At city hall?”

“Don’t worry, it is merely routine, just be very quiet so they won’t know you’re from Equestria and follow me”

Inside the Hotel de Ville, Fleur by passed the front desk and went straight to the elevators. The 3 climbed aboard and were rewarded with a gentle lurch as the box began it’s vertical assent. They got off on the 5th floor (actually the 6th floor, the foreign system counting the lobby as L, not 1) and proceeded down the gray hallway to room 526.

Inside the typical bureaucratic office, a lone clerk barely took notice of them. Fleur acted as if this was the usual routine. After a long moment, the clerk said something unintelligible. Maud and Cream gave each other a worried look, but Fleur just stood there and didn’t say a word. Her stare calmly looked over the office and out the windows, but never came to rest upon the clerk. He seemed to notice this, and seemed annoyed. He mumbled something else. Fleur did not raise to the bait. In exasperation the clerk got up from his desk and approached the counter. Again he said something that neither Maud or Cream could understand.

Fleur de Lis smiled in victory. The clerk produced a small brown paper box, marked it with a stamp and pushed it across the counter toward Fleur. She took the box and only now seemed to notice the clerk. Saying “merci” Fleur left with a bewildered Maud and Cream in tow.

“What was that all about?”

“Routine”

“But you didn’t say anything”

“Didn’t need too, ze clerk knows why I’m there”

“You mean this is some type of pre-arranged meeting?”

“Of course, all I have to do is stand there and look pretty for a few moments and the clerk gives me a box”

“So what’s in the box?”

“I do not know, but I do know enough zat I don’t want to find out”

“So what do we do with the box?”

“Ah, zat’s ze fun part”

And with that they took the elevator back down, past the lobby and into the basement. There the 3 descended another two flights of stairs.

“Voila” said Fleur de Lis

“Uh?” echoed Maud

“My pet Luna wants to come out of my bag, she tells me she can hear friends”

“Of course, welcome to ze catacombs”

“So why are we down here?”

“It is a secret short cut to our next destination”

“Oh, and that’s where?”

“Place St. Jacques”

“Do we have to walk long in this dark place?”

“No, not at all, follow me” said Fleur as she used her magic to lighten the path. The 3 mares plus bat proceeded down a well worn path to a cavern with a large diameter copper tube. The tube had a hatch large enough to accommodate a large pony or even a horse. Fleur, without hesitation, approached the hatch. Automatic lighting of some unknown source turned on. Fleur now used her magic to open the hatch. It didn’t creak open, but rather made a popping whoosh sound. The 3 ponies could hear something coming. Luna and Cream became nervous. Maud noticed and tried to reassure them.

“It’s a vacuum tube, very efficient. Is this part of the cities metro system?” asked Maud

“No, it predates ze metro by at least a hundred years”

“How do you know about it?”

“Some pony I know, knew some donkey, who knew some pony, who found this a very long time ago. I find it very useful for getting about town.”

With a loud whoosh, a voiture as Fleur called it arrived in the tube. The 3 fillies plus a reluctant bat and a carefree pet rock got aboard the voiture. Fleur used her magic to close the hatch of the voiture, which then rocketed at speeds neither Cream Pie or her pet bat had ever experienced before. The voiture had a clear dome front and rear, but there wasn’t much to see, only the inside of the copper tube they hurtled down. Fleur seemed unconcerned as she passed out 3 dark ‘costumes’ for the fillies to wear.

“What are these for?”

“Completely voluntary, but we’ll attract less attention if we wear them”

“Okay, we look like …” Cream Pie’s comment was cut short by a sudden deceleration in the voiture. Luna chirped excitedly. The trio now dressed in black robes exited the voiture and begin an accent up stairs, that Maud later estimated climbed three stories into the base of a bell tower.

Fleur only hesitated a moment at a secret door before pushing through. The 3 pious nuns walked like shadows exiting the bell tower of St. Jacques and out into the open plaza. The crossed the plaza heading toward the River Seine. They would cross the river using the bridges that connect both side of the city to the isle de city. The walk was very casual. They didn’t attract any unwelcome stares and could easily stop and stare at the many sites. They passed the cathedral de Notre dame without incident using the blvd de Sebastopol and turned left onto blvd St. Germain. Fleur led the way stopping at #4. She rang the bell and the concierge answered the door. The concierge was a frumpy pony with graying mane and an easy smile. She welcomed the ‘nuns’ without a word.

Leaving the concierge below, the nuns climbed the stairs to the 2nd floor. There another mare was waiting for them. Her greeting was affectionate and Fleur seemed pleased to see her. Fleur began “This is Miss Tabitha, you can trust her as you do me”, then turning toward their host Fleur continued “these are my friends and faithful traveling companions from Equestria”

“Bonjour, I call myself Miss Tabitha”

“Hello, I’m Cream Pie”

“Bonjour, je m’apple Maud Pie”

“Oh, you speak like you were born here”

“I was born on a stone farm”

“Well, let’s not just stand here, come in, come in”

“So did your adventure go well?” asked Tabitha of Fleur, while motioning for the others to sit in her ‘sitting room’.

“Oh, yes, we picked up ze tail crossing the river”

“Excellent”

“Wait, what?” interrupted Cream Pie “we were being tailed in these outfits?”

“Not by the normal types” answered Fleur “we were being tailed by very talented types”

“I didn’t notice them” said Maud

“I didn’t either” said Cream “I would have blasted them with my cream pie”

“Oh no, that would never do” said Tabitha “it would have made things more difficult for our ponies were watching for their ponies watching for you. Now we know who they are”

“What?” exclaimed Cream Pie

“We were the bait” said Maud Pie

“It’s a game we play; they follow us so we can find out who they are”

“So what is in the box?” insisted Maud

“The box is a decoy. The real message has already been delivered”

“So ‘who’ are they?”

“You don’t really want to know, do you Creamy?”

“Well” Cream Pie looked to Maud for reassurance before answering, and was rewarded with a negative nod, Cream answered “no”

“Smart filly, stick with your cousin and you’ll do well. And remember you’ll always have friends here”

“Okay, now what?”

“Well since all the work is over, let’s go out for lunch and then Fleur will take you to some fine dress shops”

“Will we be followed again?”

“Perhaps, but only by interested stallions, nothing official”

At a sidewalk café (where the waiter wrote down their orders on the paper table cloth) Tabitha said her goodbyes. Later the 3 mares trotted down the ‘rue’ following the lead of their guild - Fleur de Lis.

It was a most peculiar dress shop. The aura of magic was very strong. Maud and Cream both heard voices, but they didn’t understand what was being said. Fleur suggested a red dress for Cream and a purple dress with violet trim for Maud. Trying on the dresses Maud could tell that the mysterious voices were getting louder. She asked Fleur “Where are these voices coming from?”

“Eek” exclaimed Cream “I swear this dress is trying to talk to me”

“Oui, I’ll have to translate for you, until ze dress learns your language”

“Wait, what?”

“It’s ze newest fashion, all ze dresses in zis shop talk”

“Talking dresses, imagine that, who’d of thought” said Maud Pie

“So what are they saying?” asked Cream

“Only how good you look in zem. In time as ze dresses gets to know you better, they’ll start advising you on how to style your mane and which parties to go to and if zat handsome stallion is checking you out”

“I don’t think I’ll need a talking dress”

“Me neither”

“Oh, pooh, Fancy Pants gave me bits to spend. What will I do if I can’t buy you dresses?”

“Take us to a show or something”

“But I was going to do zat anyway, zat is what ze dresses are for. Tonight’s ze opera and tomorrow night ze follies.”

“Is there a polite way to tell the dresses to be quiet?”

“Of course” said Fleur, using her magic to silence the dresses.

“Aw, that’s better” said Maud

“You do look really nice in that dress” commented Cream

________________________________________________________________________

At the opera, Cream and Fleur enjoyed all the attention their dresses attracted. Every pony was very interested in the newest fashion, most swore it was the talk of the town. Maud, however, was deeply interested in the show, turning her ears as far forward as her head would allow. The utter tragedy of doomed lovers spilling out their hearts desire in song made Maud’s eyes watery. Her mood was infectious, and both Fleur and Cream focused their attention on the show.

Afterwards, they took a taxi back to the hotel.