Bleep

by Smileyface1010

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Spike, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 5706

Twilight finds a word she doesn't know in a book. The only problem is that it isn't in the dictionary, and every time she tries to say it, a bleep is heard and a black box appears over her mouth. She eventually goes insane.

On her six month anniversary of becoming a princess, Celestia decides to send Twilight a book as a present. Being her curious self, Twilight opens the book and reads it almost immediately after receiving it. But not long after starting the first chapter, she discovers a word she hasn't seen before. The only problem is that this particular word isn't in the dictionary. Every time she says this particular word, a loud bleep is heard and a large black box appears over the pony's mouth. She runs to her friends to solve this mystery, and censorship ensues. She also goes a little insane. Okay, a LOT insane.

Whoa... a thousand views? A hundred likes? That's awesome! Thank you guys so much for all the positive feedback (and the criticism, I appreciate that too!)

Rated teen for language. Even if it is censored.

Published 2014-08-13 01:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-08-13 01:40:01 UTC

Language!

Celestia and Luna walked side by side down the halls of Canterlot Castle. Celestia had a small grin on her face, but Luna looked worried. But only a few seconds later they reached their destination- a large wooden door with the word STORAGE printed in large letters on it. The door seemed out of place in the castle, where practically everything was painted gold. The two walked inside, Celestia leading the way.

The room was large and spacious. There were no shelves, only small piles of dust covered books scattered across the floor. Celestia immediately began levitating the books up one pile at a time, scanning each individual one.

"Are you sure about this, sister?" asked Luna, who was standing awkwardly behind her older sibling.

"Of course I am! Why wouldn't I be? We did this to Cadence on her six month coronation anniversary. Why not do it for Twilight too? Besides, this is definitely one of my better pranks." said Celestia, chuckling.

Luna nodded in respect. "Yes, I do realize that, but you know how Twilight can be..."

"She was my student for years Luna, of course I know how she can be!" she turned around to face her sister, smiling. "Besides, that's the fun part."

Luna sighed as Celestia turned back around and continued to scan the books. "You really need to learn to have a good laugh every now and then- Aha!" Celestia did a little hop in excitement and dropped all the books she was levitating except for one. She stared at it, dusting off the cover with her hoof.

"Perfect," she said, smiling even wider.

"Sister, don't you think-" Luna's words were interrupted by a bright yellow flash.

"Think what?" Celestia asked, facing her sister again.

"Erm, nothing..." Luna said, looking down at the floor.

Celestia rested a hoof on Luna's shoulder. "Come now sister, we have a meeting to get to." She elegantly walked out of the room, with Luna following close behind. Luna paused for a moment, turning to look at the door behind her. She knew the book Celestia was holding was now gone, off to Twilight Sparkle's house. Luna sighed quietly and closed the door with her magic. She quickly caught up with her sister, and they walked side by side down the hallway once again.

*****

Twilight was sitting on her balcony, watching the residents of Ponyville go through their morning routine. It was a beautiful August morning; the pegasi called for cloudless skies all day. Twilight stood up, flexed her wings, and breathed in the summer air. She thought about heading over to Rainbow Dash's for an early morning flight when she heard a loud crash behind her. She jumped and turned around, seeing Spike laying on his stomach at the bottom of stairs.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Spike, you really need to stop tripping coming down the stairs. You're going to hurt yourself," she scolded.

"You think I want to fall down the stairs?" The dragon didn't wait for a response. He only sighed and made his way to the kitchen.

After looking through a few cupboards, Spike let out a growl and turned in Twilight's direction. "Seriously? Do we have anything to eat for breakfast besides oatcakes? Why don't we have any gemst-" He suddenly stopped mid-sentence and grabbed his stomach tightly.

Twilight tilted her head. "A letter from the princess?" She looked at Spike as he attempted to gag up the letter. She chuckled. "Here, let me help you." A bright pink aura surrounded Spike as Twilight magically gave him the Heimlich maneuver. Finally, a large book rocketed out of the belching dragon's mouth, hitting Twilight in the face and making her drop Spike on the floor.

"Ow!" they both said simultaneously.

Twilight stood up first, rubbing her head with her hoof. A book and a piece of paper lay before her. She levitated the piece of paper to her face and read it carefully aloud:

Dear Twilight,

Happy six month anniversary! I can't believe it has been so long already! I decided to send you a little present in celebration of this momentous occasion. It isn't much, but I recommend you start reading it right away. It's a great reference guide.

~Princess Celestia

"Six month anniversary?" Spike asked from across the room. "Of what?" By now the dragon was on his feet, rubbing his forehead the same as Twilight.

Twilight shrugged. "I don't know," she said casually. Then a sudden look of fear and worry came into her eyes. "Oh my gosh, I don't know! Spike, this is terrible! I don't know!"

Spike only stared at the pony, confused.

Twilight started to pace around. "Today must be the anniversary of something really important, and I don't know what! And the Princess expects me to know what it is, and I don't! What if other ponies know about it too, and I'm the only one who doesn't? They'll stare at me like I'm an idiot!"

Spike noticed the pony's mane was beginning to fall out of place, the way it does when Twilight gets stressed out. "Relax, Twilight," he said, only hoping that his tone was reassuring. "What's today, the sixteenth?"

Twilight stopped pacing and turned to look at him. "Yes," she said. "August sixteenth, what about-" She stopped mid-sentence and turned to look at her unfolded wings behind her. "Of course! The coronation! How could I have forgotten?" She picked up the dragon with her magic, hugging him. "Thanks so much Spike! You're the best!"

"Heh, thanks," he said, wiggling his way out of the pony's grasp. He looked out the window, and noticed it was lightly sprinkling outside. He shrugged. "Well, so much for going gem hunting with Rarity today. That pony wouldn't go outside no matter how light it's raining. Well, enjoy your book, Twi. I have some comics to catch up on." And with that, he made his way up the stairs.

Twilight stared off into the distance, her eyes wide. "I can't believe it's been six months..." she said quietly to herself.

The pony then turned to face the book, still laying on the floor. A look of pure joy came across her face as she levitated it toward her and sat down in her favorite reading chair.

She examined the cover. The title read, An Alicorn's Guide To Being An Alicorn. There was no author. But Twilight ignored this fact and immediately opened the book.

Twilight was intrigued. The whole first chapter of the book seemed to be about being independent, and how you shouldn't ask anypony for help, because it was against social status for an alicorn to ask a regular pony for help. The pony stopped for a minute to think about this, but simply shrugged and read on. But it wasn't long before Twilight gasped, putting her hoof on the page.

"It's... a word I haven't seen before!" she shouted.

Twilight looked at the word closely. "Bleep," she said, reading it out loud. The pony gasped again, slowly backing away from the book.

"Twilight, what's with the shouting? And what was that beeping sound?"

"I-I don't know! I was just reading aloud and when I said this word..." she trailed off, looking carefully at the word. "I've never seen this word before!" she exclaimed. "What does it even mean?"

Twilight began flying frantically around the library. "Dictionary, dictionary... Spike, where the hay did I put the dictionary?"

"Maybe next to the encyclopedia and thesaurus?" the dragon replied, hauling a book larger than him on his back. Eventually his legs gave out, and got squished by the weight of the book.

"Aha!" said Twilight, who simply levitated the book up and opened it with her magic. Spike, stood up, dusted himself off, and grumbled as he watched the pony search through the gigantic book.

"So you were reading out loud, you came across this word, and when you said it you made that bleeping noise?" Spike asked, although Twilight was paying no attention to him. "Huh, weird..." He picked up the book and decided to give it a try, saying it out loud just as Twilight did.

"Bleep."

Twilight gasped, but it wasn't at Spike. "The word's not in the dictionary!" she exclaimed, beginning to pace again.

Spike stared at Twilight. "Well, you did get this book from Princess Celestia. Why don't you ask her? She probably knows what it means."

"But I can't, Spike! Read the first page of the book!" Twilight shoved the book in the dragon's face.

Spike read the page silently, but said the word aloud, hearing the same bleep from before. Only this time, Twilight stared at him with even wider eyes.

"What?" he said. "The same thing happened. We just gotta figure out why, that's all."

"What the-" Before she could finish her sentence, Twilight's horn lit up brightly. There was a sudden magenta flash, and Twilight and Spike both found themselves in the bathroom.

"Just walk through the library..." Spike said under his breath. "You don't always have to teleport everywhere..."

But Twilight paid no attention to him. She stared at herself in the bathroom mirror and said the word again. This time Spike noticed why Twilight was staring. As soon as she said the word, not only was there a bleeping sound, but a large black box appeared over her mouth for a second.

"What does it mean?" she exclaimed.

Even Spike seemed shocked for a second. "I-I d-don't know!" he stammered. But he shook his head and got himself together. "Okay, so let's see. We can't ask the Princess what it means, but why don't we ask your friends?"

"But that would basically be the same thing! I can't ask for help from nopony!" she stomped her hoof on the ground to prove her point.

"Bleep you," she said under her breath.

Spike tapped his claw on his chin to help him think. "Well... maybe we're not asking them... maybe we're just testing their knowledge! We are just curious if they are smart enough to know what the word means!"

Twilight looked at the dragon in amazement. "That's brilliant, Spike!" she exclaimed. She took a look at the book one last time before putting in a saddle bag, which she put on her back. She then levitated Spike on her back and rushed out the door. Spike could see the pony's mane becoming out of place more and more. He had a bad feeling about this.

*****

"Rarity's boutique is closest to here," Twilight shouted to Spike. "Let's stop there first."

"Yes!" said Spike excitedly. "I'm coming for ya, Rar-" He stopped mid-sentence when a familiar multicolored object came ramming into Twilight, knocking her to the ground and Spike off her back.

"Rainbow Dash!" screamed Twilight, annoyed. But the pegasus only chuckled.

"Heh, sorry about that Twi. Working on a new trick, but I can't seem to get the landing right..." She shrugged. "Anyways, I'll see ya around!" She was about to take off into the air when a look of excitement filled Twilight's eyes.

"Wait!" she shouted. Rainbow hesitated, but it didn't stop Twilight from tackling her. The pegasus fell to the ground with Twilight on top of her, obviously startled.

"Uh, yeah Twilight?" she said, feeling slightly awkward in the position she was in.

"I need your hel... I mean need to test your knowledge! Yeah, that's what I meant to say..." Rainbow looked closely at Twilight, who was still on top of her. Her mane was definitely out of place, and her right eye was twitching a little. She gulped nervously as Twilight levitated a strange book in front of her face.

"Tell me what this word means," said Twilight, pointing to the word.

"Bleep," said Rainbow, reading the word out loud. Her eyes widened in surprise. "Uh... sorry Twi, I don't know what that means."

Twilight groaned, throwing Spike on her back and running off, leaving Rainbow behind. "Hey! Wait up!" the pegasus shouted, but Twilight kept running. Rainbow immediately flew after her, catching up to her and grabbing her by the tail.

"Bleep!" shouted Twilight, feeling the pony grab her tail. She kicked backward, hitting Rainbow in the mouth. Rainbow released, and Twilight spun around, sending Spike flying off her back. "I don't need you!" she barked, picking up Spike with her magic.

Rainbow rubbed the spot where Twilight kicked her. She opened her mouth to speak, but Twilight's horn suddenly began to glow. There was a bright flash, and Twilight and Spike were both gone.

*****

Spike's eyes were wide, and he was trembling. Not only had he been getting pushed and thrown around all day, but his best friend was acting completely insane! In fact, he hadn't seen her act this crazy since the time she missed a deadline... "Oh no..." he whispered.

He leaped off of Twilight's back and looked around. They were at the entrance to Sweet Apple Acres. He scratched his head, confused. "Huh? I thought we were going to Rar-"

He was interrupted by Twilight grabbing his arm with her hoof. "We don't have time for talking, Spike! Lets go!" the pony barked, dragging him towards the barn.

Twilight ran up to the door and banged on it. After a moment, there was a small click and a door opened. "Oh, howdy Twilight" The mare looked down to see a small yellow filly looking right back up at her.

Twilight cleared her throat. "Hello Applebloom," she said calmly. "Do you happen to know where your sister is?"

The filly nodded. "Yeah, ah think she's buckin' the trees out in the west orchard today," she said, pointing a hoof in that direction. She studied Twilight for a moment and a worried look came across her face. "Uh... you don't look so good, Twilight."

Twilight only smiled. "Oh I'm fine," she reassured. "I guess I better go find Applejack then," she said quickly, opening her wings. Spike jumped on her back at the last moment and she took off above the trees. "Maybe the word is a country slang term or something..." she muttered under her breath.

Spike wrapped his arms around Twilight's neck as she flew, clutching her tightly. He was worried about her, but he didn't want to say anything. He gulped and looked down, scanning the trees. Suddenly he saw a speck of orange below them. "H-hey, there she is," he said, pointing.

Twilight stopped and hovered in the air, looking down to where the dragon was pointing. She saw the speck of orange almost instantly. "Good eye, Spike!" she called and dived straight downward, crashing into an apple tree.

"What the?" Applejack said, turning around to face the tree behind her. "Ah swear ah heard somethin'..." She walked up to the tree, looking up into it. "There better not be any vampire bats in here!" she shouted, turning around and bucking the tree hard with both hind legs. There was a crashing sound and the pony immediately spun back around, seeing Twilight and Spike laying on the ground along with several apples, groaning.

Applejack took a small step back, shocked and confused. "Twilight?" she said, helping the pony up. "What're you doin' here? And why the hay were you in a tree?"

"Oh never mind that! I need your help!" the princess's eyes suddenly widened. "Uh... I mean... test your knowledge!" She quickly pulled out the book with her magic, opening it to the correct pace and pointing to the word, just as she did with Rainbow Dash. "Tell me what this means," she demanded.

Applejack stared at the page. "Uh... I dunno..." She squinted, looking harder. "Bleep?" she jumped back, surprised. "What the hay?!" she said. "What kind of fancy magical book is that?" she shouted.

Twilight's eye twitched. She was annoyed. Very annoyed. "Ugh! Why doesn't anypony know what this bleeping word means!" she began to pace around.

The farm pony only shrugged. "Sorry Twi, but if you want to expand that fancy vocabulary of yours, you're askin' the wrong pony." she walked over, resting a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Now, you don't look so good. Is everything alright, sugarcube?"

Twilight groaned. "Everything's FINE!" she screamed, pushing the pony away from her. "Bleep you. Bleep all of you!"

"All of us? Twilight, there's nopony else here except for me and... Oh! Howdy Spike! Ah didn't notice ya there." she turned to look at the dragon, who was still laying on the ground. He quickly scrambled to his feet as soon as he heard his name.

"Yeah... hi..." he said, brushing leaves and twigs off of him. Suddenly the dragon's body was engulfed in a pinkish aura, as Twilight levitated him onto her back once again.

"Wellgottagoseeyoulater" Twilight quickly said before spreading her wings and taking off, only to hit her head on a large branch. "Bleep!" she shouted, and the noise seemed to echo throughout the orchard. She fell to the ground, staggered a bit, and took off again.

Applejack stared as Twilight took off. "Somethin' strange is goin' on... maybe ah should follow her," she said. beginning to trot in the flying alicorn's shadow.

*****

Spike clutched onto Twilight just as he did earlier. Not only was the princess's mane a complete mess, but it now was full of dirt and twigs from crashing into the apple tree. He ran his claw through her mane a couple of times, yawning. He realized he had missed his midday nap. The dragon rested his head into the back of Twilight's neck with a small sigh, and quickly fell asleep.

Twilight flew as fast as she could, scanning the town of Ponyville below her. She felt Spike settle in on the back of her neck, probably sleeping. She rolled her eyes and flew silently above the town, scanning the houses below. "Aha!" she finally said, diving straight downwards once again. She was able to land on her hooves this time.

"Huh?" Spike said, waking up. He rubbed his eyes and looked around. The dragon was still on Twilight's back, but Twilight was on solid ground now. In fact, they were standing in front of Carousel Boutique. He clutched onto her, trying to fall back asleep.

Twilight trotted up to the front door. She could hear the voices from inside:

"Oh, Fluttershy, it looks fabulous! Simply divine!"

"Thank you... i-it's just... I-I think there just a little too many gems on here. Do you think you could take some off? I-if that's okay with you, that is..."

"Really? I think it could use a few more emeralds..."

Twilight rolled her eyes and knocked on the door.

"Ooh! A customer! Coming, coming!" said Rarity, followed by muffled hoofsteps toward the door, answering it.

"Hello there! Welcome to Carousel Bout- TWILIGHT!!!" she suddenly shrieked.

Twilight ignored Rarity's scream. "Hello, Rarity, I was wondering if I could...uh...test your knowledge!" she said in an awkwardly high pitched voice.

"Oh never mind that darling, what in the name of Celestia happened to your mane?!"

Twilight laughed. "Oh nothing, just a bit of a bad hair day. Now, about testing you..." she said, starting to pull out the book.

"There will be time for that later darling, your mane needs fixing STAT!!" Rarity grabbed Twilight's hoof and pulled her inside. "Come sit down next to Fluttershy over here," she said, gesturing to a chair next to the yellow pegasus, who was wearing a bright green dress covered in emeralds. Rarity walked into the other room to get supplies.

"O-oh, hello Twilight," she said, smiling. "Your mane looks...different today."

Twilight ignored the pony entirely and waited for Rarity. It wasn't long before she burst into the room, levitating dozens of hair care products.

"Ah, I think this enough. At least, I hope it is..." she said, setting the products down on a table.

"Oh... my...t-that's a lot of hairspray," said Fluttershy.

"Oh don't be ridiculous darling, this is only half my collection!" said Rarity, clapping her hooves together excitedly.

Twilight growled, her eye twitching slightly. She was getting annoyed.

"Now then, let's get to work- Oh! Hello there, Spikey Wikey!" Rarity levitated the dragon off of Twilight's back, who was talking in his sleep."

"O-Oh, of course I would like to kiss you Rarity...my love..."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Uh... Spike?"

Spike's eyes opened wide. "AH!!! What the...Rarity? What about our kiss?" He looked around nervously until he notices he was magically floating in front of his crush's face. "R-Rarity? Um...its not what you think..." His face turned bright red.

Rarity chucked and set the dragon down, not saying anything to him. "Now, about your hair Twilight..." she levitated a hairbrush and started working, running it through the pony's mane. It was quiet for a moment while Rarity brushed her hair, but Twilight's eye was twitching more furiously.

"AGH!!!" she finally snapped. "I've had enough of this bleep!" she smacked the hairbrush out of Rarity's grip, standing up and facing the other ponies.

"A-are you mad Twilight? Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to anger you..." Fluttershy whimpered.

"Um, Twilight...how did you make that sound?" asked Rarity.

Twilight groaned, not answering the two, and levitated the book in front of Fluttershy's face. "Tell me what that bleeping word means!" she shouted.

"Um...I...I don't know!" she started to cry.

Twilight gave the pegasus a death stare before turning to face Rarity, putting the book in her face. "How about you?"

"Oh...um...sorry darling, I'm afraid I haven't seen that word before."

Twilight stared at the pony, slowly levitating the book back in her saddlebag. She then suddenly started laughing. "HAHAHAHA!!! I knew you wouldn't know! You're dumb like the rest of them!" she used her magic to pick up Spike and place her on her back once again. The dragon looked scared, his eyes were wide. "Have a nice bleeping day! She said, laughing as she teleported away. Rarity and Fluttershy simply stared at each other, speechless.

*****

Rainbow Dash was laying on a cloud above town square. She wanted to take a nap, but couldn't fall asleep. Her mouth still hurt from where Twilight kicked her. Twilight... I wonder what was going on with her. Where did she even run off to, anyways? she wondered. The pegasus sat up on the edge of the cloud, watching the ponies walk by beneath her. She noticed a familiar orange pony walk towards the library. Hey, there's Applejack! Maybe she knows what's going on... Rainbow leaped off the cloud and flew down to her.

The pegasus flew up right behind AJ. "Hey Applejack. How's it going?"

"Agh!" The farm pony turned around, startled. "Rainbow! Don't scare me like that!" She rolled her eyes as Rainbow laughed. "Ah was just goin' over to Twilight's. She came over to the farm today and was actin'...really weird. So ah just wanted to make sure she was all right, you know?"

"Oh yeah, Twilight," Rainbow said. "Yeah, I saw her this morning. She kept showing me this weird book with some word I haven't seen before."

"Yeah, somethin' weird is definitely goin' on..." said AJ as she knocked on the door. There was silence. She knocked again. More silence.

The two ponies looked at each other, confused. Rainbow flew over to the window and peered into it. "There's no lights on," she said. "I guess she's not home."

"Then where else would that pony be?"asked Applejack.

Rainbow shrugged. "I dunno."

Applejack thought for a moment. "Hm... well if she came to see you and then came to see me, she must be seeing the rest of the ponies and askin' about that weird book, right?"

"Yeah, that sounds right," Rainbow said. "Carousel Boutique is closer to here. Maybe Rarity knows something."

"Alright, let's go," Applejack said, smiling a little.

It was a short walk, but the two walked together in silence. Nothing much had been going on until Twilight showed up. After a few minutes, the arrived at the boutique. Rainbow knocked on the door. After a moment, Fluttershy answered.

"Oh...um, hello. Rarity is here, she's just putting her...hair care supplies away." the pony said quietly.

"Oh, howdy Fluttershy," Applejack said. "We were just wonderin'... was Twilight here by any chance today?"

Before the pegasus could answer, Rarity appeared around the corner. "Why hello darlings! Twilight just left, if you are looking for her. She was acting very...unusual, to say the least. Oh by the way, do you like my newest creation?" Rarity asked, gesturing towards the dress Fluttershy was wearing.

Rainbow and Applejack looked at each other nervously. "Um...yeah...its great, Rarity," Rainbow managed to say.

"Uh, shouldn't we be lookin' for Twilight?" Applejack asked.

Rarity nodded. "Of course! We simply can't have a repeat of last time she was acting like that. But...where could she be?"

The four ponies went silent, lost in their own thoughts. Then, as if on cue, they all came to the answer simultaneously. "PINKIE PIE!"

*****

With a bright magenta flash, Twilight appeared in Sugarcube Corner. The place had a few ponies in it, sitting at tables enjoying their delicious baked goods. Some got out of their seats and bowed to the princess, while others simply looked at her in awe.

Spike's eyes were wider than ever. "I...I... you're crazy!" he shouted as he leaped off Twilight's back, running straight for the front door.

"Not so fast, Spike!" Twilight said with an evil grin as she spun around, picking up the dragon with her magic. He was still floating in the air when the two noticed a shadow bouncing around the corner.

"Ooh! A customer! I LOVE customers!" said a high pitched voice as a pink pony appeared in the room. It was Pinkie Pie, of course.

"P-Pinkie! Run! While you can! Twilight's gone insane!!" Spike screamed, flailing his arms in the princess's magical aura.

Pinkie only laughed. "Oh, don't be silly Spike! Twilight looks fine! Look, she even got her mane redone!" she said happily, bouncing Twilight's mane with her hoof.

Twilight growled, sounding much like a dog. "I'll have you know that I'm NOT fine! We have a crisis on our hooves!" she shouted, beginning to levitate the open book towards Pinkie.

"Crisis? What are you talking about, Twily? I don't see any crisis! In fact, it's a really nice day outside! A perfect day for cupcakes! Want one?" Pinkie said, shoving a cupcake into Twilight's face.

"C-Cupcake? I...what? No! This is no time for any bleeping cupcakes! Just... tell me what this word means!" The alicorn jumped on top of Pinkie, pinning her to the ground much like she did with Rainbow earlier. By then, most of the customers in the bakery were either huddled in the corner or had already left.

Before Pinkie could speak, the bell above the front door of the bakery suddenly rang, as four ponies stepped inside.

Rarity spoke first. "Twilight? What in Equestria is going on? And..." she gasped. "What in Equestria did you do to Spike?!" the unicorn ran over to him, using her magic to levitate him out of the broken cart full of squashed pies. She set the moaning dragon down in a chair, using a napkin to wipe the pie off his cace and whispered things like 'Spikey Wikey.'

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Rarity, Ah.... oh, forget it," she said, turning her attention to Twilight. "What the-"

Rainbow Dash cut her off. "Don't worry AJ, I can handle this," she said, lifting herself into the air and ramming herself into Twilight, knocking her off of Pinkie. Rainbow was now pinning Twilight to the ground, but she stepped off of her quickly. "Oh... sorry about that, Twi. I guess I went a little too hard, heh." she spun around, facing the other ponies. "What do I do?" she said to Applejack.

AJ stared at Twilight, who was laying on the ground, unmoving. She was mumbling something to herself, but she couldn't make it out. After a moment, she spoke. "Hm... Fluttershy, you take that book. Hide it somewhere, make sure she doesn't find it. Me and Rainbow will take her to... uh, somewhere. Princess Celestia? I dunno, it doesn't matter. Rarity..." the farm pony looked over at Rarity, who was still comforting Spike. "I guess you can keep doin' what you're doin.' Now let's go!"

Fluttershy winced at the mention of her name, as she had been pretty silent. But Applejack and Rainbow Dash were now staring at her, so she knew she had to do what she was told. Fluttershy silently flapped her wings and hovered above the ground for a moment before flying over to Twilight. As she got closer, she noticed the pony was trembling slightly. She hesitated at this, extremely worried about Twilight. "Um... I don't think..."

"Just take the book!" Rainbow Dash and Applejack shouted simultaneously.

"O-oh, alright." Cautiously, the pegasus reached down towards the book that Twilight was clutching tightly. As soon as she laid her hooves on it though, the pony snapped.

"NO!!!" Twilight barked, bolting her head upwards to look at Fluttershy. Her eyes were bloodshot, and filled with rage. Fluttershy immediately let go of the book and slowly backed up toward Applejack and Rainbow Dash, whimpering. The three ponies stood together in a small huddle, speechless.

Twilight glared at the group of ponies, before slowly turning her head to Pinkie Pie, who was simply watching the whole scene with a slightly confused look. Twilight snarled as a magenta aura appeared around her horn and she levitated the book towards the pink mare. "Tell... me... what... this... means..." she seethed through her teeth.

Pinkie studied the page carefully. A surprised expression came across her face for a split second, but quickly returned to the dumb grin she always wore. "Silly Twilight, I can't tell you what that means!"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Of course, she doesn't know... WAIT, you know what this means?" Her eyes widened.

The pink mare simply giggled. "Of course I do, silly! But I can't tell you, or the audience will kill me! We are a cartoon made for kids, after all! I mean, why do you think it's censored?"

Twilight stumbled backwards. She felt as if she had been hit by a truck. She blinked a few times, still staring at Pinkie in awe. "Wh...but I... WHAT? Audience? Cartoon? Censored? What does that even mean?"

Pinkie didn't seem at all surprised. She just kept smiling. "Well I can't tell you that either! The audience will be SOO mad at me if I told you about them! Besides, if I told you who our audience really was, you probably wouldn't believe me anyway!'

Twilight only stared. "I...I..." She started to say, but she had no words. The mare fell backwards, curling up into a ball and closing her eyes. "I give up..." she muttered softly.

*****

"Hello, sister. The moon has been raised," said Luna, who sat down next to her sister on a couch.

"Oh...hello Luna. You missed the best part! Twilight just went completely insane!" said Celestia, who pointed a hoof towards the large grey box that sat in front of them and burst out laughing.

Luna looked at the box and frowned. "Celestia... she's been at this all day... don't you think it's about time to stop this prank? Look at her, she looks like she just saw a ghost," Luna said.

"But..." Celestia started to protest, but watched the box some more. Not much was happening, just Twilight laying there and her friends staring at each other, unsure what to do. Twilight did look pretty awful... "Oh, alright," she grumbled. A bright yellow aura surrounded her horn... a bright flash appeared on the box screen as the book disappeared, and Twilight looked completely normal again. Like nothing ever happened... she thought, with a satisfied smirk on her face.

*****

The six ponies looked around at each other. There was a brief moment of awkward silence before Applejack spoke:

"Well, thanks for the cookies Pinkie, but Ah better be gettin' home to the farm. Got some late night chores to do."

Pinkie grinned, who was holding an cookie tray that wasn't there moments ago. The tray was empty, all that was left were crumbs.

"I'm afraid Fluttershy and I must go as well," Rarity said. "I must finish the ensemble I'm making her by tomorrow!" Fluttershy stood behind her, nodding in agreement.

"And I uh... have to go do... stuff. Wait, what do I need to do again?" Rainbow looked at the clock. "Oh right! I have flight practice with Scootaloo! The squirt's gonna kill me if I show up late! See you later guys!" The rainbow mare said quickly as she dashed out the door. Applejack, Rarity, and Fluttershy walked out the door right behind her.

Spike yawned and walked over to Twilight. "Shouldn't we be getting home too, Twi? You look tired... what have you been doing all day today, anyways?"

Twilight froze for a moment, realizing she had a hard time remembering what she did today. "Uh... I-I think I was studying..." she said slowly.

Spike nodded. "That explains it. Thanks for the cookies, Pinkie." He started walking towards the door. After a few steps, the dragon stopped and turned around. "Uh... you coming, Twilight?"

The princess was still in a slight daze, but she quickly snapped out of it. "Y-Yeah, I'm coming... t-thanks Pinkie..." she muttered and followed Spike out the door.

"No problem! See you guys latter!" Pinkie said cheerily as the door softly shut behind them. She sat alone in the bakery for a moment, thinking. "Oh! Of course! I still need to make tomorrow's batch of brownies!" she said to herself and hopped towards the kitchen.

As she turned the corner though, the pink mare hesitated. She looked up towards the ceiling. The mare could barely make out a black box, which read TV Y. Pinkie, smiled and looked at the wall. She squinted, studying it intently. When she looked hard enough, she could make out the images of Celestia and Luna sitting on the couch, staring right back at her.

"Good one," Pinkie whispered before heading off into the kitchen to make the baked goods.