There are some days that I regret the decision to relocate to Canterlot following my sister’s banishment to the moon. The key reason behind that decision was to be closer to my subjects, both literally and figuratively, as well as make things easier for ponies requesting a Court session with me.

If only I had known back then just how stupid some of my little ponies could be at times, I would have taken steps to ensure said ponies were never granted an audience with me, if for no other reason than so I could spare myself the agony of listening to their incessant complaining and, at times, outright idiotic proposals. One such pony was currently ranting her disapproval over foreign comics to me, to which only the dignity of being a princess kept me from lifting the mare by her dress and chucking her out the nearest window.

“And that, dear princess, is the fourth of thirteen reasons why we should outlaw manga for its outright vulgar and shocking content which will undoubtedly corrupt our youth should they get their hoo-”

Thankfully, the mare’s idiotic tirade was halted when the throne room’s doors burst open and a guard came rushing in.

“Your highness! Your highness!” he shouted, panic clearly evident in his tone. “news from southern Equestria!”

“Um, excuse me?” the noblemare said to him. “We’re in the middle of Day Court and . . .” She trailed off as the effects of my sleeping spell took hold and she fell to the floor, out like a light and no longer a pain in my flank.

The guard regarded the mare with indifference for a moment before returning attention to me. “Anyway, your highness, my troops have witnessed changeling activity along the border between Equestria and the Badlands.”

“I figured we hadn’t seen the last of the changeling queen and her swarm,” I remarked. “What kind of activity were they up to?”

“We’re not sure, your highness,” the guard replied with pursed lips, “but from what we can tell, they appear to be transporting various goods from Equestria proper, including goods from the shipping yard in Horseshoe Bay.”

That got me especially curious. “They’re stealing from us?”

The guard shook his head. “We haven’t had any reports come in of stolen goods.” He seemed to space out for a moment, almost as if something else occurred to him, which it did. “Actually, I just realized what became of the Shipping Queen’s cargo.”

“Shipping Queen?”

“It was a ship that docked in at Horseshoe Bay carrying a load of various foreign goods including Prench perfumes and socks among other things just last week. I was told the ship was actually scheduled to dock in one day prior, but was late because the crew had a last minute addition to their cargo and needed time to reorganize so the ship wouldn’t capsize.”

“The extra cargo was left at the docks for a few days, during which time nopony came to retrieve it. Then, just a couple days ago in fact, it was removed during the night while nopony was keeping watch. I didn’t realize the connection ‘til just now, but now I’m positive the changelings are responsible for the disappearance of those extra goods. In fact, it might’ve been them who paid for it to be delivered here in the first place.”

I mulled over all of what he said for a while after that. The very fact that the changelings had managed to once again invade our borders was enough cause for concern, but what interested me especially was what the changelings planned on doing with foreign luxuries. The fact that they were taking goods of an amorous nature like perfumes and socks made some sense, what with them feeding on love, but exactly what they’d need with such goods left me more than a little confused.

“What should we do, your highness?” the guard asked.

“For now, I want security tightened along the southern border as well as Horseshoe Bay,” I replied. “We need to learn exactly what the queen’s up to, so focus all your efforts on identifying and capturing at least one changeling drone for interrogation.”

The guard nodded. “Will do, your highness.” He rushed out of the throne room.

I sighed heavily and turned to look out the nearby window in the general direction of the Badlands.

What are you up to now?

I watched my subjects with satisfaction as they worked to expand the love hotel’s area, adding more space to every room as well as adding new ones altogether. Additionally, a selected group of drones were digging out a hole for a pool farther back into the cave, though it had been a while since I checked on their progress.

The drones I watched right then, however, were doing an above admirable job of making more space. One group would dig away at the earthen walls, evenly expanding the living space of each room and leaving all the amassed dirt and rocks for the second group to carry outside.

The final group, which consisted of about nine-tenths of the entire swarm, would shed their carapace and use it to reinforce the expanded walls so it didn’t cave-in under the immense weight of the hill above, using their chitin to hold each piece in place. It was asking a lot of my subjects to literally sacrifice a piece of themselves, but they complied without complaint, though the unease they felt being so exposed was almost palpable. I hoped that at some point in the future the hotel could undergo a more sophisticated construction, but for the moment we were stuck with what we had.

I watched them all work with fervor, never once tiring or asking for a break. With all the progress they were making in such a short amount of time, however, I would’ve been perfectly willing to grant one or two breaks. After a while I decided to check on the pool’s progress, but a soft tap on my flank stopped me and I turned around to see who it was.

Returning my gaze was a pink pony mare with brown eyes, a black mane and tail and a Cutie Mark depicting, interestingly enough, a pair of conjoined hearts. I could tell she was here for a room since she had saddlebags slung over her shoulder, but the almost-manic grin she wore left me unnerved. I didn’t show it, though, and flashed a warm smile down at her as I spoke.

“I take it you’re here for our services?” The mare nodded. “Well, you’ve come here at an inconvenient time, as you can see.” I gestured around us at all the working changelings.

“Oh, that’s quite alright, Chryssy,” the mare replied. “A little noise is worth it to finally bed my beloved.”

“Well, in that case, let’s see who they are.” I held my hoof out for the required photo.

The mare nodded again and fished through her saddlebag. All the while she did so she kept glancing aside towards me, her unsettling smile present every time. I did my best to ignore it, and as soon as she dropped the photo into my hoof I immediately tore my gaze away from her and down at the picture of . . .

“AAAHHHHHHHHH!”

I swiveled my head around in search of who screamed. I soon found the source to be a drone who had accidentally scraped his carapace-less hide against the dirt wall.

I really need to get ahold of proper construction equipment.

I watched the poor drone for another moment before remembering I was dealing with a customer and cast my gaze down onto the photo I was holding. It was of a dark purple stallion with a white mane and tail, red eyes, and a Cutie Mark depicting a ring of blue flames. I winced upon realizing this stallion was another one which me and my swarm were unfamiliar with. While the previous time this had happened things ended up working out, I knew our luck wouldn’t last forever. To that end, I decided the need for information outweighed the risk of looking unprofessional.

“Quite the dashing stallion,” I complimented, entirely for the sake of damage control since I was personally indifferent to ponies as far as attractiveness was concerned.

“He really is, isn’t he?” the mare replied wistfully. “Oh, if only he loved me the same way I do him . . .”

I raised a curious brow at that comment but shrugged it off and continued. “Yeah, anyway, what’s he like as a pony?” I looked up from the photo to see the mare’s confused expression. “What I mean is, what are his mannerisms? How does he talk? How do you imagine he’d go about rutting you if he so desired?”

I felt a bead of cold sweat roll down my forehead at the blank look the mare gave me once I’d finished. My fear turned to confusion when the mare eventually smiled and came a little closer. She stood up on her hind legs and leaned forward to whisper in my ear.

“It’s alright if you don’t know anything about him, Chryssy,” she said sweetly.

I felt my breath catch in my throat and my entire body tense up as, for a split second, my body was akin to a statue. But then I processed all of what she said and my fear evaporated as she continued speaking.

“All you need to know is that he’s kind and shy normally, and a beast when he has a mare’s consent.” The mare’s lips curved upward into a sultry smile. “Also, and this is just so you don’t feel pressured to find us some privacy, I’m okay with having an audience watch us.” She gestured to the nearest guest room, the drones inside not having paid us any attention while they worked.

Well, this mare certainly knows nothing of modesty.

“Very well.” I turned and walked into the room. “Okay everyling, we’re gonna have a session in here, but don’t let that distract you from your work. At any rate, those without a carapace have nothing to do and need the love energy more than anyling else, so I expect no fighting over it. Am I understood?”

All the drones who were working saluted while the aforementioned carapace-less ones chirped happily. With a nod of satisfaction I returned to the mare and showed her into the room.

“Your lover will be with you shortly,” I promised.

“Thanks, Chryssy,” she replied, and settled down onto the bed, leaving her saddlebag by the door.

I left the room and ventured down the hallway behind my desk. The door on the left led to a large, open cavern, in the center of which a multitude of changelings were digging away at the ground. In the ceiling was a hole through which the light of day shined through, illuminating a spot on the ground yellow in contrast to the glowing green of the walls, used by changelings to transport dug earth without having to traverse back through the hotel.

I pulled aside a changeling which was hauling a load of earth toward said hole and gave them the photograph of the mare’s crush. I instructed the drone to don the stallion’s supplied persona once it’d hauled the earth away. The drone saluted, and buzzed off through the hole, returning a minute later and exiting through the doorway leading to the hotel.

I spent the next few minutes observing my changelings’ progress on the pool. The idea to add one to the love hotel came about after a little research into pony romantic customs, wherein I discovered that a large quantity of romantic outings between ponies take place at or even within bodies of water. In fact, based on mine and my changelings’ research, many foals are conceived during late night swimming sessions between their parents.

I’ll never understand mammals.

“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

The sudden scream emanating from the hotel made everyling stop dead in their tracks, eyes wide with horror as they stared at the door. I, however, merely pursed my lips and instructed them all to continue working while I looked into it. They obliged, though the fear never left their expressions as they watched me slip through the door and start trodding down the hallway toward the main lobby.

Probably another clumsy carapace-less drone.

Upon entering the main lobby, however, I was greeted with a very different sight. All around the room were several changelings with looks of shock and disgust adorning their faces. Some of them were backed up against a wall or cowering in a corner, but a few were comforting a drone which I recognized as the one I sent to pleasure our newest guest. It was shivering uncontrollably on the floor in the middle of the room, its expression one of pure horror.

“What happened?” I asked, making my way over to the poor thing. A brief glance into the guest room revealed sight of the mare laying on her back, seemingly content from the way she was smiling. “Did something go wrong?”

The drone slowly looked up to me, its expression unchanging, and opened its mouth to speak.

Like the rest of my fellow drones, I had been sent out by Queen Chrysalis to study notable ponies in Equestria after the incident with the mare who asked to lay with one Big Macintosh, older brother of one Applejack, Element of Honesty. The mission was to observe the mannerisms and general behavior of whatever ponies we deemed to be the most sought after romantically.

The mission, from what I’d heard, was quite successful. In total, the swarm put together a collective profile of over fifty Equestrians, including all of the Element Bearers as well as their closest family and friends, the princesses, and even a few non-ponies including the spirit of chaos himself, Discord.

Why anypony would want to sleep with that monster is beyond any of us, but regardless, we need to be prepared for any requests we are given, which is why I couldn’t help but wonder just who the pony I was disguised as was? I truly believe we managed to cover every notable and/or sought after Equestrian on our mission, so whoever I was acting as must’ve been very obscure among Equestria’s populace.

At any rate, I knew how to act to the client, and so was ready to service her.

I trotted down the hallway into the main lobby, passing fellow drones while they worked. Some of them shot brief glances to me as I passed by, most likely curious as to who I was disguised as, though they didn’t let themselves get distracted from their work. Upon reaching the room where the client was I took a deep breath and relaxed my nerves, not wanting to botch the performance I needed to keep her suspension of disbelief intact.

After taking a moment to stretch my, quite muscular, fore legs I slipped inside. The client was observing my fellow working drones from the bedside with interest, but turned her attention entirely to me as I entered. She gave me a sultry smile which, going into character, I shied away from.

“Hello, big boy,” she cooed, her tone oozing with confidence and seduction.

Not knowing what the voice of the stallion I was disguised as was, I simply waved my fore leg in a nervous manner.

She giggled in response. “Well,” she got up off the bed and began sauntering toward me, swaying her flanks back and forth in what I guess ponies consider a sexy manner, “let’s not waste any time.” She hooked a fore leg around one of mine and began gently pulling me toward the bed.

Ponies are weird, I thought.

The drones without carapaces focused all of their attention on us as the client and I got up onto the bed, while the ones who did still have theirs continued working, unmindful of the scene which would be taking place there in just a minute’s time.

“Now,” the mare said, batting her eyelashes at me, “if you’d prefer that I start, I’d be more than happy to oblige.” She capped off her statement by bringing her head closer to my groin, keeping her anxious gaze on me.

I gestured to her with a fore leg to indicate I’d prefer that she start.

The mare looked down at my dick and, after licking her lips, began sucking me off. While feeling her coat my shaft with saliva made it grow erect, I myself felt not a shred of sexual attraction in response to her actions. While a changeling may be able to copy the DNA of another being as well as all of their bodily functions, the transformation doesn’t alter our base instincts. We don’t feel sexual attraction the same way ponies do, so the pleasurable moans I uttered as she blew me were one hundred percent feigned.

A muffled sigh of content sounded from the mare’s dick-filled mouth after a while, and I felt a load of jizz building up in my penis. This was my cue to disengage the mare’s mouth from my shaft and refrain from letting it escape. Most of the swarm isn’t against letting female clients swallow loads, but others, including Queen Chrysalis, feel that letting ‘life’s nectar’ go to waste is unacceptable. While I wasn’t one to mind such sexual fetishes, I also wasn’t one to disobey the Queen’s will, and so I used my hooves to push the mare off of me before using my changeling magic to hold back the coming jizz, intending to save it for when I actually fucked the client.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my fellow drones getting excited, no doubt anxious to receive some love energy to help regrow their lost carapaces. They wouldn’t have to wait very long.

“Aww,” the client whined, moving to sit up straight with a pout, “what was that-Eep!”

The mare was surprised by my sudden advance. With how strong my assumed form was, it wasn’t any trouble to pin down the mare by her chest. I mouthed the word ‘mine’ to her, which I meant to indicate I was switching to this stallion’s dominant side, as she’d described him having when engaged in sex.

The mare blushed lightly while panting softly. “Y-yes,” she whispered, “I’m all yours.” She wrapped her hooves around my own and tried to bring me down for a kiss, which I complied with while keeping my hooves pressed firmly against her.

Like with the earlier oral sex, I felt nothing but indifference to the kiss. In contrast, it was clear as crystal the mare beneath me was so enamored by the meeting of mine and her lips. A small part of me was curious about what went through ponies’ heads when engaged in shows of affection such as a kiss. While I’ll likely never know the answer to this, one thing I could discern from this particular encounter was how genuine this mare’s love for her beloved was.

Just her kiss alone was exuding massive waves of love energy, and I could hear the buzzing sounds of my fellows behind me as they helped themselves to the amorous buffet on display before them. Normally we’d wait until after sex before extracting a client’s bill from them, as that’s when the most palpable love energy is produced. To receive so much food from just a simple kiss, regardless of how passionate it is, was a testament to how much this mare really loved the stallion I was disguised as.

We need more clients like her, I mused internally before abruptly breaking the kiss.

The mare let out a small gasp in response, and stared into my eyes with an expression of pure bliss. I stared right back with my best attempt at a predator’s gaze, hoping I was meeting her expectations as far as behavior was concerned. With a contented sigh, the mare fell backwards with her fore legs splayed out above her head.

“Do me,” she said softly, “please.”

Hmm, I guess she’s satisfied with my performance. I crawled atop her. Hopefully, she’ll enjoy this one as well.

The mare reacted to my dick’s admission to her pussy in a, to me at least, overly dramatic manner. Instead of a soft gasp as was typical, she let out a long winded sigh that sounded more appropriate for climax than initial penetration. Whether she was just really sensitive or liked overdoing her reactions, I could care less. All that mattered was giving her what she wanted.

I slowly inched my dick into her, letting her get accustomed to my cock. A crimson tinge adorned her cheeks as she looked down at my invading stallionhood, her eyes betraying the level of desire she had for it, which was a lot. She laid her head back down onto a pillow and completely relaxed every inch of her body, basically giving me free reign of her body, free to do as I wished.

I didn’t wish to do anything more than give her what she came for. While I’m sure many ponies, stallions and mares alike, would relish in the chance to perform all kinds of kinky fetishes in this situation, I wasn’t a pony. I had no desire to treat the mare like a sexual plaything, nor did I feel expected to for that reason. She was nothing more than a horny virginal client in my eyes, desperate for cock enough to come to Queen Chrysalis and the swarm for relief. I don’t know if ponies normally engage in kinky acts before sex, but unless she specifically requested it I wouldn’t bother.

I kept inching my way into her vaginal passage until, eventually, I could proceed no further. I waited a few moments to let her pussy expand to accommodate my dick. As I waited, I let my gaze linger down onto the mare’s face, and found myself a little warmed by the sight which greeted me.

The mare was crying, but not out of sadness. Rather, the tears which flowed down her cheeks were filled with joy, clearly indicated by the smile which graced her lips as she returned my gaze with half-lidded eyes that spoke of genuine happiness over having my dick buried fully inside of her.

“I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long,” she admitted, “and to have it finally come true is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me.” She took a moment to wipe away her tears with a hoof. “Just, don’t hold back, okay?”

With a curt nod, I pulled out of her about halfway. Her vaginal walls slowly drew inwards, only to once again expand outwards as I thrust my dick back inside of her, to which she let out a pleasurable moan, which was also overly dramatic in my opinion. And so it went that I repeated this at a steady pace, gradually building up the speed of my fucking until eventually the action between us was little more than a blur to the eye.

I shifted positions a few times during our fuck session, figuring she expected me to showcase her crush’s rougher side. For the first shift I flipped the mare onto her barrel and pinned her fore legs to the bed with my own, while the second time had me underneath and her spread eagle atop me, yet with her hooves held in place behind her back with my magic. Even as a creature that knows little more than the basics of pony sex, I’m pretty sure keeping a mare in the dominant position and yet not actually dominant is something to behold. Not that I really care, though, since I only did it to satisfy the client’s desires.

Eventually, the inevitable climax came. I felt the seed rushing through my dick, which swelled up once in response, then retracted before swelling up again and shooting my load into the mare. She threw her head back and gasped, the expression on her face one of pure bliss as my seed completely filled her up.

“Yessss,” she whispered, reveling in the warm feeling my love juices brought her.

As soon as I felt the last of my seed shoot into her I gently lifted the mare off of my dick, which went limp immediately, and set her onto the bed, resting her head against a pillow. I then rested my head next to hers, looking into her eyes which gave me a half-lidded content expression. I took that to mean I satisfied her, and prepared my magic to collect the bill.

“That was amazing,” she said softly. “Thank you, brother.”

Author's Note

I wonder just how many of your reactions the title of this chapter foreshadowed?