Chrysalis' Love Hotel

When the changeling swarm invaded Canterlot, I was pleasantly surprised that Princess Luna had been absent throughout it all. She sure is a heavy sleeper, and had she not been, my goal of conquering Canterlot might have ended even before it actually did. Facing down just one alicorn was tough enough even with enhanced strength, but having to face down two would’ve been a worse nightmare than Luna’s alter ego, assuming she didn’t turn into it when facing against me, in which case I probably wouldn’t have survived.

At any rate, I knew next to nothing about Celestia’s sister personality-wise then. Now, however, I know at the very least she shares her sister’s hatred of me.

The three of us, as well as a small bunch of both my drones and the princesses’ guards, sat around a crystalline table placed directly upon the border between Equestria and the Badlands, everyone on their respective sides. The table had been brought by the princesses from Canterlot, because they ‘refused to allow [me] into Equestria to conduct the meeting’. As understandable as that reasoning was, the odd choice of location for this, by all means, official diplomatic meeting had me convinced there was more to this than what was noticeable. It’s for that reason I instructed my drones to be extra cautious and vigilant during the proceedings. I sat on one end with them on either side of me, while the princesses sat on the opposite end with their own guards next to them.

They all held expressions of utter disdain on their faces as they stared at me, and I was all too happy to return one in kind. Luna had been very vehement in voicing her disgust over the existence of my Love Hotel upon their arrival, but as far as I was concerned she was just a second Celestia, so I regarded her about the same way I had the solar alicorn the other day.

“Let’s get started then, shall we?” Celestia finally said.

“I thought you’d never ask, princess,” I replied.

Celestia lit her horn up, to which a single scroll levitated out from behind her side of the table. It floated over to my side, and one of my drones caught it in his grip before unfurling it on the table in front of me.

“Those are our proposed terms for your pardon,” Luna stated. “We may debate should you find any of the negotiable ones to be unsatisfactory, but there are some we will not compromise on.”

Nodding, I looked down and began reading the text, being extra careful not to miss any fine prints. Thankfully, the whole thing was short, sweet, and to the point, so at least the princesses were merciful in that regard. There were no fine prints from what I could read too, as well, so at least they weren’t trying to slip anything past me.

In exchange for an official pardon from their royal highnesses, Princesses Celestia and Luna of Equestria, for Queen Chrysalis of the changeling swarm, for invading Equestria as part of her attempt to overthrow the aforementioned mares from their seat of power, the following stipulations are demanded.

1. Forevermore, the changeling swarm is banned from setting hoof in Equestria. Non-negotiable

2. Failure to comply with the prior stipulation will result in the immediate eradication of the changeling swarm. Non-negotiable

3. While the Equestrian government shall officially sanction the Love Hotel, in no manner shall it advertise its practice and/or purpose. Non-negotiable

4. All stipulations are timeless, and shall apply to any and all future leaders of both the changeling swarm and Equestria.

5. This pardon has both the changeling swarm and the kingdom of Equestria officially recognize each other’s existence.

6. Should unforeseen circumstances necessitate cooperation between the kingdom of Equestria and the changeling swarm, the stipulations set forth by this pardon may be rendered null and void until said circumstances have come to pass.

7. The stipulations set forth by this pardon apply only to changelings that are affiliated with Queen Chrysalis and aren’t indicative of possible relations between Equestria and swarms not affiliated with her.

8. Should anypony who makes use of the services provided by the Love Hotel come under physical or mental harm by Queen Chrysalis or her changelings, pending an investigative query to determine where faults lie, the changeling swarm will once again be considered enemies to the safety of Equestria and eradicated. Non-negotiable

9. Territorial acquisitions for either Equestria or the Badlands buying a section of land from the other is hereby prohibited.

10. Queen Chrysalis formally apologizes for her attempted invasion of Canterlot to the Equestrian government. Non-negotiable

“This is quite a lot for a simple pardon,” I commented once finished reading. “It’s more akin to a treaty than anything.”

“Well, this is the first official diplomatic reading between our races,” Celestia said. “We decided it should make clear our relationship moving forward.”

“Not a very pleasant relationship, I see,” I noted dryly. “Nevertheless, so long as my Love Hotel can continue operating, I can agree to all of these conditions.”

Celestia seemed to adopt a faraway look in response, while Luna nodded sagely and levitated a quill over to me.

“Sign at the bottom if you’re absolutely sure,” she said.

I grabbed the quill with my own magic and signed in big, cursive letters at the bottom of the scroll. I then levitated both back over to the princesses, and watched as they took turns signing it themselves.

“Well, that’s it then,” Celestia said. She stood up and stretched a bit. “We’re done here.”

“Indeed,” I said.

The royal guards got up and moved to pick up the table. Luna wasted no time in turning around and beginning to lead them away into Equestria. I made to do the same with my changelings when Celestia’s voice halted me.

“Chrysalis, may I have one last word with you?” she asked.

I motioned for my changelings to continue back towards the Love Hotel, leaving just me and Celestia together on either side of the border between our homelands.

“Yes, Celestia?” I said.

Celestia gave me a wistful stare which I found to be both amusing and concerning. Amusing because it looked so out of place for her at that moment, and concerning for that very same reason. She appeared to stare through me for a while, as if analyzing my mind, before turning to look to either side of me.

“Do you particularly enjoy living here, in the Badlands?” she asked, turning back to face me.

I was confused by the question, particularly because of how random it seemed. I glanced to either side of me and took in the Badlands’ landscape. It was dreary, dull, depressing, and a whole lot of other things rather negative, but it had been the home of my and my swarm for such a long time, and we’d grown used to living here long ago despite its deplorable conditions.

“I wouldn’t say we enjoy living here, per se,” I replied, turning back to Celestia. “We’ve long since acclimated to its merciless environment, and we could continue living here indefinitely because we’re strong like that.” I smirked. “Not that I expect your little ponies could do the same.”

Celestia shook her head. “I wouldn’t expect, or even want, them to try,” she replied. “This place is just plain awful.”

“Of course you’d think that,” I snorted. “So, why’d you ask the question?”

Celestia gave me the same faraway look again, then sighed and looked downcast. She then muttered something unintelligible.

“Beg pardon?” I asked, leaning closer.

Celestia faced me again with a neutral gaze. “And how did you like Equestria?” she asked. “At least, from what little you saw of it?”

I stared blankly at her, once again confused by the question, before scrunching my face up in thought as I tried to remember some more prominent features of Equestria from what I saw during the invasion.

“Well, it’s certainly lush and vibrant, I remember that much,” I answered. Tapping my chin, I continued listing things I remembered. “I’ll admit I was rather amazed by the view afforded from Canterlot over the countryside, and the architecture, at least for Canterlot, was very exquisite.” I shrugged. “All in all, your home is a pretty nice place.” I tilted my head curiously. “Again, why are you asking me this?”

“So, you’re saying Equestria is preferable to the Badlands, correct?” Celestia asked yet again.

I snorted. “Any place is preferable to living in the Badlands,” I answered. “I’m pretty sure every living thing will agree with me on that. Now, why are you asking me all these questions, Celestia? We’ve signed the pardon, so why are you keeping me here?”

“Because I want you to realize something before we depart for the last time, Chrysalis,” she said. Celestia than fixed me with a stern glare that actually managed to make me worried for a second. “Though you may not believe this, I am a mare that cares for the well-being of all living things, and had you come to me seeking help instead of attempting to conquer Equestria, I would’ve been more than happy to extend that same courtesy to you and your swarm. All those things you said you liked about Equestria? You could’ve had the privilege of seeing many more sights like those, and whenever you wanted, had you shown trust in me.”

Her glare hardened, making me actually frown with slight trepidation as I instinctively took a small step back.

“But you didn’t trust me, did you Chrysalis?” Her tone was practically seething now. “Instead of looking to ally your race with us, you sought to conquer Equestria and make it your own little playground. It’s for that reason you’ll never set hoof in Equestria again, Chrysalis, and you’ll never have a better life than your current one in the Badlands.”

I found myself at a total loss for words in response. Celestia just stood there for a few seconds, gauging my reaction, or lack thereof, before turning around and following after her guards and sister.

I just stood there, watching her retreating figure for what felt like hours, but was probably little more than a few minutes, unable to move or speak. A whirlwind of emotions and thoughts churned through my mind, among them denial, fear, regret, and above all else sorrow. Everything Celestia said was correct. I hadn’t trusted her enough to just ask for help, nor did I ever entertain the idea that maybe changelings and ponies could be good allies.

I’d never believed we could, what with how different we were, and how xenophobic ponies generally are. But if Celestia, their ruler, had sanctioned an alliance between our races, then maybe her little ponies would’ve been more accepting of us.

But it was too late for that now. I’d already signed the pardon and agreed to all of its terms, rather hastily in hindsight.

With a sigh, I turned around and began trudging back to the Love Hotel. I hadn’t made it about ten steps before turning back to look at Equestria. That was as close as I’d ever get to it again, and just knowing that fact made me shed a tear, which fell to the ground by my hooves, dampening the otherwise dry soil.

Tearing my gaze away from Equestria, I resumed walking, and a single thought ran through my head.

This must be how my clients feel after losing their crushes.