A Weekend With Diamond Tiara

by The Good Doctor K

Rating: teen
Tags: Diamond Tiara, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Original Character, Comedy, Slice of Life, DJ P0N-3
Length: 4152

Filthy Rich goes on a business trip to Manehattan, and Diamond Tiara has to stay with a friend of her father's. This might not go well. (Or it might...you never know)

Filthy Rich goes on a business trip to Manehattan, and Diamond Tiara has to stay with a friend of her father's. This might not go well. (Or it might...you never know)

Any art in this story is drawn by Mousei11.

Published 2014-04-29 00:00:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-20 22:48:28 UTC

Chapter One

The Chief Prosecutor was reading a book when he heard on knock on his door. He looked up, readjusted his glasses, and used his magic to open the door. The pony on the other side of the door was an elderly beige earth pony with a grey slicked-back mane. He wore a blue vest and a red tie with a money symbol on it. His cutie mark was three bags of money.

"Hello, Mr. Rich," the Chief Prosecutor said, closing his book. "How may I help you?"

"Evening, Endgame," Filthy Rich said, sitting in a chair across from the Chief Prosecutor's desk. "You're not working on a case right now, are you?"

"Not at the moment," Endgame said. "How may I help you?"

"Well, tonight, I'm going to be leaving on a business trip to Manehattan," Rich said. "And due to certain complications, I won't be able to bring my daughter, Diamond Tiara, with me. So, I was hoping that she could stay with you for the weekend."

Endgame sighed. "I'm not sure, Rich," he said, being sure not to call his friend by his first name. "Our daughters don't seem to get along, from what I've heard. Them being in the same house for an entire weekend might not go well."

"Please, I can't find anypony else to watch her," Rich said, a pleading tone in his voice. "Besides, I would be willing to pay you for this. Please?"

Endgame sighed. Filthy Rich was obviously out of options, and he couldn't very well turn down a friend in need. "Alright," he said, "Diamond Tiara can stay at my house for the weekend. When do I pick her up?"

"I'll send her over here at 5," Rich said. He stood up from his chair. "Thank you, Endgame."

"Happy to help," Endgame muttered halfheartedly. "I hope your, um, business in Manehattan goes well."

Filthy Rich smiled at his friend. Even with such a position of power, Endgame had always been a child at heart, trying his darnedest not to offend anypony. He had noticed that Endgame had never called him by his first name.

"Well, I'll be off," Rich said. "Thanks again." He trotted out of the door, closing it behind him.

Diamond Tiara looked up at Town Hall and sighed. "Well, let's get this over with."

Halfway through school, her dad had told her to go to Town Hall and ask for somepony named Endgame. The whole way home, that blank-flank Turn Table had followed her. Every time Diamond asked why, Turn simply lowered her head and didn't respond. Eventually, Diamond had given up on any explanation out of the wallflower.

Diamond stepped inside and Turn Table followed her. Diamond approached the secretary's desk, where an earth pony sat reading a magazine that was lying on the desk. When Diamond approached, she looked up at her. "Can I help you?" she asked.

"I'm here to see somepony named Endgame," Diamond Tiara said.

The secretary eyed Diamond skeptically. "What business would a filly like you have with the Chief Prosecutor?" she asked.

"I'm not just any filly," Diamond snapped. "My Daddy is a very important businesspony and he told me to meet somepony named Endgame. Do I need to tell my Daddy's lawyers that--"

Turn Table stepped in front of Diamond and smiled at the secretary. "Hi, Misty," she said in that quiet sophisticated voice of hers. "We're here to see Daddy."

The secretary looked kindly at Turn Table. "Oh, I didn't know that you were with this filly," she said. "You two go on ahead. You know which floor he's on, right?"

"Yup," Turn Table squeaked in the most enthusiastic tone of voice Diamond had ever heard the filly use. She turned to look at Diamond. "Come on, Diamond. Let's go!" She ran off towards the elevators behind the secretary. Diamond followed, confused.

Turn Table's daddy was the Chief Prosecutor? Diamond didn't know exactly what a prosecutor was, but if anypony was chief of anything, they were probably--no, DEFINITELY--important.

As the pair stepped into the elevator, Diamond observed Turn Table. She was a unicorn with a dark green coat and a white and blue mane that always hung in her face. Strangely, her tail was completely white, like her mane had been dyed. She had white eyes that she often kept hidden behind grey glasses that Diamond could tell were purely superficial. For the first time, Diamond noticed that the filly looked important.

But Turn Table didn't act like she was anypony special at all. She never stood up to Diamond, she just shrunk back and took any blank-flank insults. She seemed more like that wimp (Flitterguy or whatever she was called), always curling up into a ball at the first sign of trouble.

"Um...d-did I do something wrong?" Turn Table asked, noticing the Diamond was staring at her.

"No," Diamond said. "I just...why didn't you tell me your daddy is the Chief Prosecutor?"

"Well, w-we're not exactly friends," Turn Table remarked.

"Well, I would have been your friend if I had known that your daddy was so important!"

Turn Table looked like she was about to respond when the elevator opened. She quickly stepped out and Diamond had to hurry to keep up. The pair walked up to the door marked 1202, and Turn Table knocked.

The door was enveloped in a dark green glow and it opened. The inside of the room was decorated with an extremely large bookshelf, a chessboard, a desk, and a stack of books on the back of the windowsill.

Behind the desk was a handsome green unicorn with a crimson and purple slicked-back mane. He wore a red pinstripe vest with a badge on the lapel, a grey scarf, and purple glasses. He wore a silver bracelet with a blue circle around his right foreleg. He jumped slightly when he saw the fillies. "Oh, Turn Table," he said in a deep, sophisticated voice that reminded Diamond of Turn Table.

"Hi, Daddy," Turn Table said, trotting up to her father and giving him a hug. Her father, who must have been Endgame, returned the embrace. Turn Table gestured to Diamond Tiara, who was still standing in the doorway. "This is Diamond Tiara. Her daddy told her to stop by the office." She turned back to Endgame. "Do you know why?"

Endgame sighed. "Turn Table," he said, "I know that neither of you will be happy with this, but, Diamond, you'll be staying with us for the weekend while your father's away in Canterlot."

"What?" Turn Table squeaked, looking at her father in shock. She leaned close and whispered in his ear, "How could you let my worst enemy stay with us for a whole weekend?!"

"It's just for the weekend," Endgame assured. "Please, just try to be kind to her. If she calls you any bad names or assaults you physically or mentally, you let me know."

Turn Table sighed. "Fine."

Endgame smiled at his daughter. "Thank you," he said, brushing her mane out of her face and giving her another hug. He set her down on the floor and turned to Diamond Tiara. "Now, shall we leave?"

Endgame magically opened the door to the slightly-larger-than-average house and let Diamond Tiara and Turn Table enter. Turn Table ran off upstairs to find her mother.

Turn Table find her mother, as usual, dozing off in front of the computer with her headphones on. Her desk was covered in various Reese's Cup packets and Coke bottles. Turn Table looked at the laptop and noticed that her mom was listening to one of her songs.

Turn Table tapped her mom on the shoulder. "Um, Mom?" she said questioningly.

Her mom snorted, then opened her eyes and looked at Turn Table. "Oh, hey, Turn Table," she said, smiling. "How was school?"

"It was...good," Turn Table said, hesitating.

Turn Table's mom noticed the hesitation and sat up straight in her chair. "Are you sure everything's okay? Did something happen at school?"

"Well..." Turn Table sighed, then looked her mother in the eye. "Daddy agreed to let the school bully stay with us for the weekend."

"What?!" Mom exclaimed angrily. "Where's you father?"

"D-downstairs," Turn Table stuttered, surprised at her mother's outburst.

Her mom seemed to calm down, stroking Turn Table's hair and putting on a forced smile. "I'm...gonna go talk to Daddy, okay? You just...go play your games."

"Okay," Turn Table said, brightening. She ran into her bedroom and turned on her PonyStation.

"Endgame, may I speak with you for a minute?"

Endgame snapped out of his daydreaming and looked up at the mare at the bottom of the stairs. She was a white unicorn with magenta eyes and a blue striped mane that hung partially in her face.

"Sure thing, Vinyl," Endgame said, smiling at the sight of his wife. He always loved being around her. She was the only mare he knew willing to put up with his constant daydreaming and admittedly childish behavior. Endgame turned to Diamond Tiara. "Um, Diamond, why don't you go play with Turn Table? She's probably upstairs in her room."

"Okay," Diamond said, walking past Vinyl and up the stairs.

Endgame looked at Vinyl. "So, what's up?" he asked.

"What's up is that you're letting one of Turn Table's biggest tormentors stay in the same house with her!" Vinyl whispered harshly. "And for a whole freaking weekend!"

"Let me explain myse-"

"There's no possible way you could justify this!" Vinyl interrupted. "Have you heard the stories that Turn Table tells about what Diamond Tiara calls her? She torments her every chance she gets! And you're letting her stay in the same house!"

"Vinyl, just listen!" Endgame yelled. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Look, her dad is a friend of mine. He's on a business trip in Manehattan and he couldn't find anypony to watch his daughter." Endgame looked into Vinyl's eyes. "He had no other options, Vinyl. If he did, I'm sure he would've taken them."

"Still, what are we gonna do about Turn Table?" Vinyl asked, calming herself and seeing Endgame's side of the argument. "Diamond Tiara will probably still torment her when we're not looking."

Endgame thought about that. "How about this?" he proposed. "Tomorrow, we take them out to...I don't know, Sugarcube Corner? Get Pinkie to throw a small party? That might give them a chance to bond."

"What reason would we give Pinkie to throw a party?" Vinyl asked.

Endgame smiled. "Trust me. Pinkie will never turn down an opportunity to throw a party."

Vinyl smiled. "Alrighty, then. It's a plan." The pair shook on it.

Chapter Two

"So," Diamond Tiara said, "this is what you do in your free time?"

When Diamond had walked into Turn Table's room, she had found the filly sitting on the floor, levitating a controller and playing a video game. The game was definitely not something that Diamond would play (not that she played video games in the first place). It consisted of a spiky-haired stallion punching and bucking his way through an army of savage-looking ponies. What was happening on the screen was extremely hard for Diamond to follow, considering all the blood and pony parts that were flying everywhere.

"Yeah," Turn Table said, her tongue hanging out of her mouth in concentration. Then she looked as if a thought had occurred to her. She turned to Diamond Tiara, levitating another controller. "You wanna play? It's co-op."

To her own surprise, Diamond said, "Uh, sure."

Diamond wasn't sure why she said yes. Maybe it was because she wanted to see the appeal of this game. Maybe because it was probably more fun to play than to just watch somepony else play. Either way, she took the controller. "So, uh, what do I do?" she asked.

"Well," Turn Table said, pausing the game and pointing to her own controller, "you basically just beat up everypony that's not you or your partner. X jumps, square does a normal attack, triangle does a heavy attack, and circle does your signature move." She pointed to the two knobs. "The left knob moves you and the right know moves the camera." Turn Table plugged in the controller Diamond was holding.

The game unpaused, and another stallion appeared. Diamond moved the left knob and the stallion moved as well. She began pressing the buttons to attack the other ponies.

Knock knock knock

"I'll get it," Endgame said, putting down his comic book. He stood up from the couch, walked to the front door, and opened it. Standing on the other side was a pony strikingly similar to Vinyl, with the single exception being that the pony outside was a male.

"'Sup, Endy?" the pony said, giving Endgame a hug.

"Record!" Endgame said, returning the hug. "What are you doing here?" Endgame looked behind him into the house. "Vinyl, your brother's here!"

Vinyl, along with Turn Table, rushed down the stairs to meet the two stallions. Diamond Tiara just stood at the top of the stairs, staring at the reunion. Vinyl and Turn Table joined in the hug.

"Woah, hey!" Record Scratch said, almost falling over from all of the hugs. "You guys act like you haven't seen me in a decade!"

"Your visits are always the best, Uncle Record," Turn Table said.

The hug ended, giving Record a chance to speak. "Well, I just got back from my tour across Equestria, and I wanted to come visit my favorite bro-in-law. And my sister and niece," he quickly added.

"Oh, right," Vinyl said, remembering her brother's tour. "How'd the tour go?"

"It was a huge success!" Record said. "I'm still kinda upset that you and Endy didn't come with me."

"Sorry, Record," Endgame said, shrugging. "But I'm Chief Prosecutor now, and I've got a lot of responsibility." He beamed at Record. "Of course, if you ever want me to help you with a song..."

Record returned the smile. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind," he said. He then looked past Endgame and up the stairs. "Who's the filly upstairs?"

Endgame looked back at Diamond Tiara. "Oh, this is Diamond Tiara," he said, gesturing to Diamond to come down. She began walking down the stairs. "She's a...friend of Turn Table's. She's staying with us for the weekend while her dad's away in Manehattan."

"So you're Record Scratch?" Diamond asked, trying to contain her excitement. Record Scratch, or DJ-COL7., was one of her favorite musicians. She had listened to all of his songs and loved every single on of them. How many other important ponies did Turn Table know?

"You bet I am," Record said, smiling. "I have to give you props, little filly. You're the most contained filly I've ever met. Besides Turn Table, of course. Most of the time, they just squeal and ask for my autograph."

"Must be nice to be so famous," Vinyl muttered. "I'm reduced to making songs and uploading them to YouTube, never making any money or anything." She looked up at Endgame, managing a smile. "Well, at least I know one pony will always listen to my music."

"You bet your flank," Endgame said, wrapping his foreleg around Vinyl. "I will always be your number one fan."

"Well, Endy," Record said, setting his saddlebags down and opening them, "I kind of had one more favor to ask. You see, my landmare kind of thought that I was never coming back and sold my apartment. So, do you think I could stay here for a while?"

"Sure," Endgame said. "Stay as long as you want. Just...if I'm working on a case, don't mess up my files, okay?"

Record did an over-the-top salute. "I hear ya loud and clear, Chief!" he said.

Endgame immediately regretted his decision.

About two hours later, Diamond and Turn Table were asleep in Turn Table's bed. When Endgame had gone to tell the two fillies to go to bed, he had been shocked to find Diamond very absorbed in Hoof of the North Star: Colt's Rage, a game that he never expected to see a filly like her play. Diamond's eyes were drooping, however, and she went to sleep without a fight. Turn Table had fallen asleep at the controller thirty minutes before, and drool covered the left thumbstick.

Endgame walked downstairs where Vinyl and Record were playing DJ Hero. "I'm going to bed," he said through a yawn. "Record, I'll get you some blankets and a pillow so you can sleep on the couch."

"The couch?" Vinyl asked, pausing the game. "Endgame, he can sleep with us."

Endgame would've laughed if not for the look on Vinyl's face. "Vinyl, no offense to Record, but I don't want to sleep in the same bed as him. It would feel...awkward."

"You let Diamond and Turn Table sleep in the same bed."

"Because they can't understand the implications..! Look, I don't care what you say, Record is not sleeping in the same bed as us!"

12:00 AM

"Endy, scoot over."

"If I scoot anymore, I'll fall off the bed."

"I'm about to fall of the bed."

"Both of you, be quiet. I'm trying to sleep."

"Screw this. I'll just go sleep on the couch."

"Endgame, hold on-"

"Sorry, I just can't...deal with this right now."

"Woohoo! More room for me."

"Keep it down, Record."

Chapter Three

"Um, Daddy?"

Endgame awoke from his comfortable slumber on the couch and looked into the darkness. He was able to make out the shine of Turn Table's white mane. She looked like she had barely slept, and her blanket was wrapped around her like a cape.

"Come here, honey," he said, holding his blanket out. Turn Table trotted up beside him and lay down beside him, snuggling close to her father. "What's on your mind?"

"Diamond said that you were a really important pony," Turn Table said. "How come you never told me that you were important?"

Endgame sighed. "Well," he said, "she's right. I am a very important pony. I didn't want you to know how important I was because...I thought other ponies might want to be friends with you just because of my position."

"So, you didn't want me to make friends?" she asked innocently.

Endgame couldn't suppress a quiet laugh. "Those ponies wouldn't be real friends," he told her.

"What is a real friend?"

Endgame paused. "Turn Table, have I ever told you the story of Twilight Sparkle? She was a great friend of mine. She and her friends understand friendship better than any other pony ever has or ever will. She could probably offer a better explanation of friendship than I could." Another pause. "But I can try. A true friend is...somepony who will stick with you when they would rather be anywhere else. Friends show their love in times of both trouble and happiness. Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies. The ponies that might befriend you because of my position, that's not friendship. That's parasitism."

"Like Diamond? She was never this nice to me before."

"Exactly. Until she learns to appreciate you for you and not for me, she's not a true friend."

Endgame heard Turn Table sniffle sadly. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I...I don't have any real friends," Turn Table said through quiet sobs. "Nopony at school appreciates me for being me."

"Well...:" Endgame said, thinking of a way to console his daughter, "maybe they just haven't had the time to learn how good of a friend the real you is. I know that, if the ponies at school took the time to get to know you, they would see that, in the end, it was worth the effort."

Endgame could feel Turn Table's breathing slowly becoming steadier. He began singing a lullaby that Twilight Sparkle had taught him.

A true, true friend helps a friend in need

A friend will be there to help them see

To see the light

That shines

From a true, true friend

"Attention, everypony! I have an announcement!"

"Dude, you're not the princess. Keep it down."

Endgame looked angrily at Record, momentarily scolding him, then looking back at the others. "Today," he said, "we'll be going to Sugarcube Corner. I'm going to pay Pinkie Pie to throw a party."

"What's the occasion?" Turn Table asked, taking a sip of her milk.

Endgame smiled. "Heck if I know," he said. "I just thought that while we have Diamond over would be a good time to have a party." He turned to look at Diamond, who was still eating her pancakes. "After all, we want you to have fun while you're our guest."

Diamond gave a totally-not-sincere smile to Endgame. "Well, isn't that nice of you?" she said with a touch of steel in her voice.

"Or," Endgame said, "you can stay here and listen to me play Hoof of the North Star." Vinyl and Turn Table let out a collective groan that told Diamond Tiara that the party would be a much better choice.

"I can come, right?" Record asked, taking a sip of milk.

"Of course," Endgame said, though  he didn't sound to sure. "We'll leave as soon as you all are done with breakfast." He took a last bite of his apple and trotted to his bedroom. He slipped on his glasses and his bracelets.

When his bracelets were on, the world flash around him for a second and he felt magical energy fill his body. He always loved that feeling.

"Welcome to Sugarcube Corner, the bestest bakery in all of Ponyville! I'm Pinkie Pie, but you probably already knew that. How can I help you?"

Endgame gave a low, slightly formal bow to the pink mare in front of him. "Good morning, Pinkie," he said. "I was wondering if you would throw a party for-"

He didn't get the chance to finish. Pinkie Pie gasped in excitement, then ran to the back room of the bakery. A few seconds later, she came back to where Endgame and company were waiting, wheeling a blue cannon with pink wheels. "Let's get this party started!" she cried.

As if Pinkie had just used a voice command, the cannon fired, spraying confetti and streamers all over the bakery. Against all logic, the streamers were perfectly set up on the rafters, though the confetti rained down on Endgame and Vinyl, getting in their manes.

"So, who's the special guest of honor?" Pinkie asked.

"Diamond Tiara," Endgame said, gesturing to Diamond, who had stared at the whole display with a look of confusion.

"Is it her birthday? Her cutie mark party? Anniversary? Where are all the guests? A party's more fun if there are more ponies!"

"Annivers..?"

"Actually," Vinyl cut in, "this was kind of just a random occasion. We just felt in the partying mood. You understand how that feels, right, Pinkie?"

"'Oh, yeah," Pinkie said. "I'm always in the partying mood."

"Good," Vinyl said, smiling. "Now, let's get this-"

"Party started!" the two mares said in unison. Pinkie ran outside and shouted, "Hey, everypony! Paaaaaaaaaaartyyyy!!"

"Oh, shi-"

Before Endgame could finish his obscenity, he was interrupted by the sound of thunder--I mean, the hoofsteps of dozens of young fillies and colts running into the bakery. It felt like there was a large earthquake that would bring the entire building down.

"Now, now, everypony," Pinkie said, suddenly very serious, "one at a time."

The thundering of hooves slowly died, and a group of fillies and colts entered, looking like they were ready to bolt at any minute. Huge smiles broke across their faces when they saw Record. "Look, everypony!" a small orange and green filly said, pointing a hoof at Record. "It's DJ-COL7!"

Five fillies and two colts ran up to Record, who stepped back, a huge smile spreading across his face. "How's it goin', my little ponies?" he said, using his familiar catchphrase.

One of the fillies fainted on the spot.

"Mister Endgame!" a voice said from the crowd of foals. Endgame turned and saw a light grey unicorn with a blonde mane approaching her.

"Um...who are you?" Endgame asked. Could she be a friend of Turn Table's? No, she said she didn't have any friends...

"It's me, Dinky Doo," the filly said. "You remember me, right? You and my uncle battled in court once."

Endgame chuckled at the filly's word choice. "Now I remember," he said. "You're Willpower's niece, right?"

"Yup!" Dinky Doo said, beaming. "Ever since then, I decided that I want to be a defense attorney just like Uncle Willpower."

Endgame ruffled the filly's mane. "Well, study hard and you'll get there. Who know's? If I'm not retired by the time you become a lawyer, we might even 'battle' each other in court."

"I'd love to face the Chief Prosecutor," Dinky said. She got a mischievous look on her face. The look was almost...evil. "You're on!"

Endgame gulped fearfully. This filly was scary.