We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender. – Winston Churchill

“So concludes another journey for Ash Ketchum. What will wait him in the new area of Landos? Find out next time in a new episode of… Pokémon!” The OLED television clicked off. The lamp shone its glorious false sunlight down upon the child who sat disappointedly in front of the television. He frowned at the darkened screen; having watched the very last episode many times before. This left him wondering as to what may have happened if they had continued their journey to Landos. The creators ran out of ideas for the television series many years ago after generation eleven; their character creationists having exhausted their creative minds.

“Why didn’t Ash age past ten years old in fifty years, uncle?” Here I am sitting on the couch behind my eight year old nephew, David, watching the old kid’s show that should have died decades before it actually ended, but it sauntered on. I chuckled at my nephew’s question. It brought up old theories of what may have happened, but nobody knew. It could have been a coma, or perhaps magic? God knows that magic doesn’t exist. It’s all a bunch of cheap illusory tricks with smoke, mirrors, and sleight of hand.
“I don’t know Davy. There are plenty of theories, but they are too complicated for a young mind such as yours. They left it to your imagination back in those days.” I sighed and thought back to the 2000’s. Those times were much different than it was. Now in 2042; the world had pretty much gone to hell. A weird type of manmade bacteria made all wheat effectively plastic, inedible and non-biodegradable. That was a few years ago though; nothing to wander back to now.

“Maybe it was magic! Like, the Pokemon he was around loved him so much that they didn’t want him to change so they used their super powers to make him ten forever!” I laughed heartily at his theory. It may have been possible, who knows? I heard the familiar tire against gravel as a car pulled up and into the old driveway. Some chatter was to be heard after the sounds of car doors shutting echoed its way into my home. David picked up on the chatter rather quickly and rushed towards the door in excitement.
There were a few raps of knocking on the door, and my nephew quickly answered the door to reveal my brother, Lee. “Hey there buddy! Oh, hey Terry, how’s work going?” I smiled at my brother hugging his only son.

“Working at the radio station has been alright; I’m glad that I took some time off today to spend time with your son here. They told me that I would get to host my first show tomorrow. I guess working as a mass communications specialist for the Navy really did pay off for a better job, eh?” I cocked an eyebrow at my brother, who looked rather impressed himself. A look of shock and remembrance crossed his face.

“Speaking of radio, you might want to turn it on when I get out of here, Jenny is waiting for me back at the house and she is expecting me really soon so I got-“ I waved my hand at him.

“Nah man, it’s alright. Say hi to her for me, and bye Davy!” Lee and David waved goodbye and left my humble abode. Lee shut the door behind him, saving me the trouble of actually getting up and having to do work on my day off.

I thought about what Lee had said about turning on the radio. Was there some kind of song playing, or was there some kind of weird thing that those Soviet terrorists did? Perhaps some kind of jet crashed into the ocean again. Of course he had to leave me itching with curiosity. I heard the slam of the car door before my two visitors drove away. I’m glad I purchased a small house in the middle of nowhere, because hearing that everyday used to get on my nerves.

I pivoted my head around to view my old fm/am radio that sat on the coffee table gathering dust. I groaned as I bent forward to look closely at the face of the radio. It was a simple one really; all it had were two dials, volume and tune respectively, and a digital station displayer. I turned on the radio by clicking the off switch to the on position, and I was rewarded with the chatter of the Mexican Republic. I sighed and spun the dial around, which then landed on 97.9 FM. I sat back and then let my radio do the talking.

“-pink. The dome is pink, is that correct Mister Giovanni?” Huh, something about a pink dome involving the Secretary of Foreign Affairs.

“That is correct, and to answer your next few questions. There is indeed a spot of land just inside the dome, and we have indeed made contact with their civilization. In fact, I have with me here Princess Celestia from the Kingdom of Equestria.” I threw my head forward and let out a deep groan. Surely this has to be some kind of stunt by the onion.

I turned off the radio and turned on the television with a clap of my hands. My eyes flew open at what I saw before me. The Secretary of Foreign Affairs was shaking hands… Or hooves in the case of the big white pegacorn horse thing… It stood at the podium next to the Secretary and began to speak.

“Greetings people of The United States of America. I am Princess Celestia; Ruler of the Kingdom of Equestria. I wish to thank your kind leaders for their hospitality in accepting us here as not aliens, but ambassadors to open relations.” Celestia seemed to pause for a moment to look over the crowd. “We have taken notice of your plight on this world, and we wish to free you from said plight. We wish to accept the human population into our fair nation of Equestria with open arms. Our nation is beautiful and clean, plenty of open air and space for your people, and plenty of hospitality to go around for everyhuman here!”

The Secretary sniggered at her fault in speech, as did I. I press remained silent with only the lone flash from a camera to break the resolve. Secretary Giovanni motioned for the Princess to continue her speech. She smiled and nodded at him gracefully.

“There is but one problem regarding this solution.” Celestia’s face dropped to a grim expression for a moment, but quickly returned to the beaming smile. “We cannot accept humans into our land, but there is a solution!” She quickly halted the press’s cries of outrage. “Allow my student, Twilight Sparkle, to explain the solution to you.”

The Princess stepped down from the podium, allowing a much smaller, lavender unicorn to take her place. The mare was using some kind of glowing force to shuffle some papers on the podium. She looked over the press nervously before looking to Celestia, who gave her a nod.

“Hello uh… Humans. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I, along with the help of Ston Stanley, have developed the solution to the problem regarding transport into erm… Our fair country!” She paused for a moment and levitated a beaker full of a purple, viscous liquid onto the podium. “Because humans are unable to travel to our country due to them having no magic in their system, we have devised this potion to solve that! We highly suggest you take this potion, although it will transform your body and perhaps mentality… Into that of a pony. You will get to spend the rest of your lives in paradise!” Twilight beamed at the crowd of press, who soon burst into applause.

Twilight stepped off the podium, and her mentor stepped back up. “Stations that are dubbed ‘Conversion Bureaus’ are currently being set up all over the world to solve your problem! The process is near instantaneous, painless, and free! The homeless will have a place to live, and the foodless will have food to eat! Fear not my little humans, a new life awaits you!” Celestia spread out her wings as the press cheered louder. I just turned off the television with the clap of my hands and stumbled backwards into my couch.

“What the fuck was that, and why the fuck did this happen.”

Author's Note

Ston Stanley is a real person, and he is my friend.