Immortality "Never" Fails

by Mr Sarcasm

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Sad, Other, Random, Princess Celestia, Sex
Length: 3015

In the eyes of an Immortal, what is "the most `Inconvenient` thing possible?"

Jeremy explores the unknown. Long forgotten territories of the Universe, as well as other Time(s), Dimensions and Galaxies. Some with Benevolent contradictions others, quite the opposite. But first, Jeremy has one problem. How to get off of a dying Planet without breaking the Laws of Natural Order and Discretion.

Published 2014-06-01 23:30:05 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-01 23:30:05 UTC

Prologue/Chapter 1: Intro; much distraction.

Prologue: Immortality "Never" Fails

Twilight Sparkle stuck her horn in a hole that was in a bright gray wall that matched her horn thickness and length to the Quantum level of accuracy. As the hair on the top of her head made contact with it's physical, her eyes closed violently and shot an aurora of energy out from her horn that began to emanate from inside the wall. Making the original gray mix with a pure purple along it`s entire surface. After only seconds of mere concentration, her eyes shot open, releasing a bright and powerful white light that the soft gray floor reflected extravagantly. And after less than a second, mechanical reverberations sounded from the inside of the wall. The Alicorn's eyes closed, again, and re-opened with her original color scheme her pupils proudly, and brightly, shown.

Her magic dissipating with little speed as she pull her horn from the rather small sized hole.

As she finished puling out her horn, she lifted her head, eagerly, to see the hole be covered with a protective metal barrier that slid down with little to no hesitation. A loud beep echoed through the room and a red light blinked atop the covered hole. And everything stopped. The lights shut off, the beeping muted and there was no sign of anything happening. All except two.

Resounding and lightly pulsing through the air of the room, was the low hum of another fan being switched on, red light still continue blinking rhythmically on and off.

The corners of Twilight Sparkle's face contorted with crests of a large smile, and a small tear escaped her eye then ran down the entirety of her cheek effectively dropping onto the floor, and creating a mini tsunami as it splash onto the tile.

A screen flickered on and above the red blinking light, and shown hundreds if not thousands of lines of code for the initial startup, streaming in a downward fashion like credits to the end of a movie zooming to the bottom of the screen in a hurried pace.

The monitor turned off for a second, then flashed back, with exactly no hesitation in it`s peak. The screen read,

"Initial protocol, startup 1... Recording elongated responses from both host and server... Scanning..."

The blinking red light stopped flashing on and off, then stayed on, and a bright and long red line played along, up and down each wall with much haste, repeated many times. Then shut completely off.

"Scan complete... One unidentified host... Please state Host Name, Place of Stay and Occupation into Device."

A small square panel flipped over on her side of the wall, revealing a microphone and tiny camera below the screen. Tiny green light blinking to show recording is activated.

"Twilight Sparkle, Ponyville, Equestria and Princess of Canterlot alongside the Royal Sisters." Twilight calmly spoke into the microphone. She smiled to herself a little, because she finally spoke a sentence without stressing her words or grammar. Almost as if practiced.

"Scanning..." Read the screen. Speakers activated and the computer started, in a technical sounding voice,
"Scan and Identity Confirmed... May you please state reason of activation?" As well the screen read, computer voice sounding rustic and non-pony.

"Time Flux and Quantum Leap." Twilight stated simply. Starring up into the screen with a glare.

"Please set Time, Parameters..." Read the screen and sounded the Speakers. Sounding hesitant and yet, somehow very distant.

"January 1st, 2103, 10:02 A.M... two days, 4 hours and 2 minutes before i met my soon to be best friends..." Said Twilight into the microphone, sounding hopeful, stressed and saddened by the world around her outside of the protective box she was in.

"State Time, Restriction Passcode." Spoke the speakers, screen shutting off and few red lights turning on to illuminate the room with a red gleam. With no white luminescence illuminating the room. Twilight shuddered in anticipation and took a deep breath.

"Alpha Niner Beta Template 3-7-6-2." Spoke Twilight, growing shaky and the ground beneath trembling in aftershock.

The lights turned back from red to white, the screen flashed on and the Speakers spoke in unison to words writing on screen. "Password Accepted... Relative Time and Space Manipulator, and Vortex Distinguisher fully functional...... Activating..." Beginning to sound a lot like GLaDOS.

A small syringe peeked from beneath the floor, stuck it's self into Twilight's hoof, who didn't seem to even notice, and injected her with a clear, seemingly harmless liquid. Then quickly pulled it's self into the floor immediately with hurried and calculated rapidity.

The humming inside the walls grew louder and louder and the building began to shake violently from tremors beneath.

"HURRY!!" Twilight shouted into the microphone, becoming eager and afraid. Her body beginning to shake more from fear and anticipation of massive amounts of pain.

The walls began to crack, and a steam began to fill the room with poisonous and hot red gasses. Making the Alicorn start to choke and cough.

A bright white light beamed in the center of the room near Twilight Sparkle, and began to grow and grow. Eventually sucking Princess Twilight into the ocean-y and starry abyss of Time. Knocking her unconscious immediately, faster than a punch of 10 G's, applied directly to the skull.

As soon as the Alicorn was sucked into the trans-dimensional light, a small mechanical orb shot into the vortex. And lightning struck it from the inside, hitting the small orb, and forcing the wormhole to close.

Tremors stopped and gas was still leaking into the building, but at a very slow and almost un-noticeable rate.

"Goodbye... Love~." Stated the computer speakers, with a sad looking animated Princess Celestia forming on the screen. Eyes full of tears. "I will never forget you..." Whispered an animated and depressed Celestia. Voice no longer robotic, but smooth and loving. Able to caress and sooth, the most petrified of minds.

"Self destruct mode activated..." Spoke the computer override.

"T-Minus 3.... 2.... 1.... Ignite!"

Animated and sad Princess Celestia put her hoof onto the screen and bowed her head.. accepting her fate to be. Her face now an endless stream of tears dripping from both her cheeks.

A rocket shot, straight up into the sky from the roof and came down, directly impacting the building, making a beautiful explosion of a multitude of colors from the rainbow. and more... Scattering the building into billions of pieces in all directions.

Tremors began to make the planets surface shake violently, and giant mile sized cracks began to envelope the planets surface, eating all that sit atop the ground. And the sun began to grow tremendously in size, easily engulfing the planet into a fate of fiery flames and thousands of degrees of hot gasses. Making any and all surviving life become vaporized immediatly, as well as most rocks instantaneously become hot, molten lava. Some, randomly combusting into thin air.

From the view of space, the planet was fully engulfed in flames. And no sound travelled anywhere for the time being.

As silence filled the essence of space, a giant hole formed into the middle of the planet, exposing the inner core. And a brief flash brightened the dark, fire infested sky above.

And the planet suddenly exploded, catapulting the suns radiation filled fire elsewhere, but the large red celestial object stay in the sky, unmoved. Streams of white air and light shot in everywhere, creating a large and reverberating 'BOOM!!!" as well as sound echoed for seconds on end.

A giant tear formed in the center of where the planet used to be, and a tiny but massively growing black hole immediately formed in it's place. Sucking the sun inside in it's wake.

~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~

In another realm far faarrrrr away, a space-ship like white and metallic box flew out from basically no-where, a human like being flew out of one of its trash ejection slots and its body was still. Blood floating around and on the human body. The spaceship slowly increasing in speed, making it's attempted escape.

A black hole formed right in front of the being and a bright yellow Sun flew out then stopped. Literally on top her being, from several hundred feet away.

______________________________________________

Chapter 1: Immortality "Never" fails; Many Importance, Such Distractions.

A hardy sigh of desperation escaped Jane's lips as she was looking for a way, any way she can to explain herself. But fear overcoming and anger rising on a dangerously high level, she shouted at the rather malevolent, Alien 'Priest.'

"Who the FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TO SPEAK TO ME IN THIS WAY??!!! I HAVE BEEN SO CALM AND SO GOD DAMN NICE TO YOU FOR 25 YEARS!!" Screamed Jane at the very top of her lungs. "I TH-... I thought you were my friend?!" Whimpered a very hurt Jane, now defending herself. Her face bent to the whims of a mix between a sad and utterly pissed frown.

The Priest stood still, listening to every word with great 'patience,' awaiting the moment, the small window he should have to say what he has in mind. Though not in the actual sense of the word, no emotions are displayed from his face, nor posture nor any sign that would give way to any obvious signs of annoyance or antipathy. Emotions, for a shorter description.

"Jane, dear-" Started the Priest.

"Don't you EVER call me 'dear!'" Snapped Jane, her voice heavy with disgust and anguish.

The Priest put his alien hand on her shoulder and looked deep into Jane's eyes, which in turn, she looked back. Her eyes watering, developing a small dome of tears which surrounds her eyeballs, ready to fall into stream across her face.

"What's causing you all these troubles of despair?" Asked a curious yet, slightly worried-sounding Alien Priest. "You're making me worry, dear.."

Jane knocked her shoulders, forcing his alien hand off her while her face turned red, furious with anger, "You wanna know what's up my ASS, huh? IT'S YOU!!"
"YOU LOOK SO... SO FRIENDLY AND SEEM LIKE YOU CARE ABOUT THOSE AROUND YOU, YET WHEN THEY MAKE A SINGLE FUCKING MISTAKE, IT'S THE END OF THE ENTIRE GOD FORSAKEN UNIVERSE!!!!" Jane spat on the Aliens face. "Burn in hell."

"Warning." Sounded the ships alarm system, "Incandescent Particle Field detected... Activating Evasive Protocol F16-3."

In the ship, with both the Priest and Jane distracted, and with heavy curiosity mixed with fear in both. The air began to grow thin, fewer atmosphere's lower than needed for the Human 'Jane,' to survive or at least stay conscious. And a loud, reverberating, low baritone note like noise began to fill their ears, or ear like buds, on the side of their heads. Jane choked and eventually passed out from a lack of Oxygen, her body fall limply to the floor after her head bluntly hitting the sharp corner of the metallic table.. The Alien just stood, smiling at her limp body with an evil grin.

"Madeline." The Priest called to the ship, still staring at Jane's body, and received a three note musical preference, signaling the ship was ready to take commands.

"Accelerate to minimal velocity, then, gradually, speed. Full thruster... Override standard protocol F16-3."

"Command Confirmed, slowing descent." Received the Priest in return. And the ship pulled forward lightly in response.

The Priest walked over to Jane's limp form, and with it's small slit like lips, pecked her on the cheek.

"Goodbye. Jane." It said in a cold voice. And stood up, a steel rod attached to the wall in his grasp, and pushed the red button beside him.

Two large and heavy looking steel, rusty doors drove upward, and large amounts of air was sucked out into the depths of space, including Jane's unconscious body which was violently torn from her spot of which she was laying, leaving a blood mark on one of the steel doors from where she hit her head, again with massive force of beyond anything survivable.

As her body flew out the ship with a blur, the Priests ship sped on going the opposing direction of the hurtling body. And from Jane's point of view, an explosion awoke her. She grabbed her head from pain, and stayed still.

____------_____-----_____-----

As her body lay in way, she starts to slowly regain her part of understanding of reality, and starts panicking. She squirms and fights, but to no avail. She is in the grasp of space, and there is no way of escape without help from an outside force.

Just as she begins to take comfort in having no gravity, nor air what-so-ever, and floats, still, accepting her fate. Nearby, opens a portal, extreme in size. Heat so extreme to the point of past imagination and cognitive understanding, exited through and beyond the eye of the portal. And made it's way to Jane. On a direct path, and hurtling towards.

She screamed so powerfully it reverberated, and made the stars twinkle from the recognizance of pain in her voice.

~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~***~~~~~

Lying asleep and snoring like a Stallion, was the Princess, Twilight Sparkle, inside a vaguely familiar cave. And floating silently in front of her was a small white orb full of old, Ancient looking hieroglyphs and signatures. That bent and contorted to the whims of every curve and drawn line. In no way did it look natural. The lines look like they're constantly moving, even when you're looking directly at them. Though they're completely still.

The white had an un-seen illumination, as if it were glowing or displaying emotion. And with each look at it, came the thought risk of it attacking or busting a move dangerous to you're physical contributions that keep you in-tact. But, the funny thing is... It was completely, and utterly... still. And somehow facing the unconscious Mare, Twilight Sparkle. As if watching her intently..

Small sounds escaped the deemed Princess's muzzle, as well as a gasp and light groaning filled the air amongst the cave. The Princess rolled on her back, trying to find a nice 'n comfy place to rest, which was successful, but at a cost. The Sun was now shining brightly in her face, and the cave around was illuminated with the faint purple from her coat. She put her hoof in the way, in vain attempts to block the blinding light.

***Point Of View, Twilight Sparkle***

The ground beneath is hard, cold and unsettling. You roll over to find the once dark world is now suddenly bright, and you draw in a full breath of air. Feeling your body awaken to the welcoming warmth of the sunlight, gently hugging on your skin, and finally bringing your once cold coat some warmth. You groan, and let out a soft sigh and slowly open one of your eyes, to find the sunlight is too bright for you're retinas. And you violently snap that eye shut. A slight pain starts in you're head, complaining that it's too early and you should sleep another 5 minutes. Yet you're heart protests otherwise. That you should have been awake hours ago.

You draw in another deep breath and push you're body upwards, against the force of gravity, and open you're eyes once again, but this time, putting you're hoof in the way to effectively block the light that's still persistently, slightly burning at you're corneas.

The area behind you is an enclosed, mini cave, but the one in front is still waters. As open and as wide as is possible. To the left and right, beach sand and beyond that, grass infiltrates the land and few Palm Trees line across into the vastness of great beginnings into a vastly sized forest. You notice that the air, somehow isn't as nourishing as you remember it last, but you set that knowledge aside and study the lands with more intent.

There's something wrong with this place, you're ears flicker from side to side and you're eyes move from place to place to find that everything is still and, almost paused. Like when you hit the pause button on you're DVD player, mid movie. You notice how there are birds floating in the air, but stuck and not flapping. You notice that the Ocean in front, the waves that splashed in air. Are still stuck and confined to the space of which they flew to.

You're stomach churns, a chill runs down the length of you're spine and a cold sweat beads in you're upper brow. You're breathing intensifies as you're heart rate increases and the world around suddenly becomes too bright again. So you retreat you're way back inside of the cave and hide under the darkness of the shadows, in a hurried attempt to escape the pain.

As you blindly run back into the cave, not paying attention to the insides of the cave, really not watching where you're going. You're horn hits something hard and Metallic, sparking on contact and you scream in agony from what you just struck. You're body flies into the back of the cave, unconscious from the sudden burst of pain, and the small Metallic white orb falls beside you're still but breathing form.

You're face contorted into that of discomfort and pain.

______________________________

New Object Acquired: Metallic Ball

You're ability to withstand pain increases by 1, but you're skills to run blind decreases by 3 fold.

As you awake next, you're body will be mostly accustomed to it's 'new' environment. You're skills of reason and logic dictation will be invalidated by you're new surroundings, and you will find it difficult to make sense of the new 'laws'. Until you figure out you're new world, everything will trouble you in any way they can. Find ways to counteract these symptoms, as it will be key to you're survival.

Author's Note

I know it's a bit short, i will make up for that later on in the story. But otherwise... Tell me what you think.

Any and all critisizm is welcome.

And Thank You for spending you're time to read this, it means a lot to me.