Taco Walker 2: Hola

by EquestrianWriter

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Queen Chrysalis, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6
Length: 1153

Juan the Mexican Taco dealer saves Equestria from Changelings, the orange background pony is less than pleased

It was supposed to be the happiest day of Princess Cadence and Shining Armors life, but when one Cadence turns out to be a Changeling and the other has been trapped underground for days all hell breaks loose. With Changelings attacking Canterlot and Ponykind in need of a hero it is up to the legendary Taco Walker, Juan, to save the day, now armed with spicier tacos and a bigger cart to serve them with.

Published 2014-05-05 17:40:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-05 17:40:04 UTC

A good Mexican goes to war

The whole city was in chaos, Shining Armors shield had been broken and Changelings poured into the city attacking ponies all over. Twilight and the rest of her friends were suspended in mid air, trapped in the green cocoons. Slowly being fed of their love. Almost every pony was either already stuck in a cocoon or being prepared to be placed into one. All but Applejack, she was too unimportant to be placed in custody and all the Changeling invaders were simply ignoring her, standing in the center of Canterlot castle screaming at the Queen to let her friends go, but what love could a simple background pony have? Derpy Hooves had more importance than this orange equine.
The Changeling queen laughed and looked to PrincessCadence, she wasn't in a cocoon but was stuck in green too all the same.

"My my, who says a girl can't really have it all?" The Queen laughed. "Your Princess is useless against my power, your husband is under my complete control and my Changeling army have captured any who could resist my power!"

"There, will always be somepony to rebel against you, you won't get away with this!" Cadence shouted back, weak from all the fighting.

"There is NOPONY, no hero to save the day. Nothing!" The Queen shouted back, as she did the room was blinded by a white light, evrrypony and every Changeling had to shut their eyes and look away from the source, which seemed to be coming from the center of the room. The light lasted a good minute, and when it began to slowly fade, the room was in silence.

Standing where the light once was, was a talk, tanned man. Wearing a large red and green sombrero and holding onto the metal bars of what looked like a taco stand. That orange background pony fainted, not that anyone cared. But she knew who this man was. With large dark brown eyes he looked up at the stunned Changeling queen.

"Hola Señorita. What you like a taco?" He asked, gesturing to the stand. A makeshift crayon drawn sign reading 'Juan's Tacos' was writing in various colours.

"What?" The Changeling asked, loudly. Then moved her head about in frustration. "Actually never mind. Who are you?" She added.

"My name is Juan, from Juan's Tacos. I sell tacos Señorita." He replied. Then looked to her again. "Would you like one?" He asked. The Changeling queen didn't know whether to be angry or confused.

"I am a little busy here taking over Equestria, if you could just go back to where you came from that would be great."

"Taking over Equestria? Si, I can see that. You seem to have it under control. One thing though Señorita."

"What?!" She shouted.

"Have you eaten anything yet? Señoritas have to eat si. Especially when taking over Equestria." The Mexican replied, the same plain, deeply accent driven voice as always. He gestured to his stand again. Those tacos sure looked tasty. There were much spicier ingredients though, a pony would need to relieve itself much faster now. And Juan knew that.

The Changeling flew down toward the stand and looked at the product, Juan already held out a rather large and spicy looking taco. It would easily send the Queen to the royal bathrooms. The Changeling grabbed the food with her magic but the taco didn't leave Juan's dark and slightly hairy hand.

"You may be a queen taking over Equestria Señorita, but a man has to make a leaving, si?" Juan explained, the Queen grunted and pulled a but from seemingly no where, Juan traded the bit for the taco and the Queen instantly took a bite.
Flavour overtook her senses and the queen had an orgasm then and there. Never had the queen tasted something so good, she could almost take some love out of this taco. She took another bite and received the same reaction, it was a perfect taco. How this man had come to Equestria was anypony's guess, but the queen was more than thankful for it. Producing now a bag of bits, she finished the taco.

"I'll take them all." She mumbled, bits of taco still in her mouth.

"I wouldn't do that amigo." Juan cleverly said, the queen threw down the bag, the gold of the money almost glowing.

"MOAR!" She screamed, spitting bits of chilli everywhere. A few of the Changeling drones had flew into the castle, hearing their queen's cries. Some had joined the queue behind the queen, hoping for a taste of this product the queen was so addicted to eating. Juan smiled and gave the queen a plate with over a dozen tacos of all sizes on it. She smiled back and stepped aside to let her Changelings try some. The queen suddenly felt a rumble in her stomach but ignored it, eating another taco.

About five minutes later, all hell had broken loose, Changelings were flying all over the castle looking for a bathroom and the Changeling queen was doubled over clinching her stomach. Staring at the Mexican with hatred in her eyes.

"What. Have, you. Done to me!" She screamed, holding in some waste.

"I warned you amigo." Juan replied, he hadn't moved from his stand. "You said youself that you were taking over Equestria, but Equestria is a good buyer of mine. You tried to take my business away from me si? And where I come from, there's normally some sort of fight in that aftermath. So I brought my family with me si? And they're going to send your Changelings home in boxes. Family!" Japuan shouted, then barked something in Spanish. A side panel to his taco stand opened and Mexicans began to pour out, all armed with ammo and AK-47s and revolvers, all wearing different colored sombreros and all screaming in Spanish. Then the gunfire started as a small army poured out from a 2 metre squared area. One Mexican had a canon and began to fire at the oncoming Changelings.

The battle only lasted ten minutes at the most and the Mexican army began to disappear back into the taco stand. Every pony was now free and the remaining Changelingsbin full retreat. Celestia walked over to Juan, who still hadn't moved from his taco stand. The only difference being a bullet hole in his giant hat from a wild shot.

"My good sir, you saved us today. How can Equestria ever thank you?" She said, smiling at the man. Juan was shaking his head.

"No amigo, I need no thanks, just knowing my business is alive is good enough. For now though. I spneed some rest. Goodbye amigos. I will return!" He said, waving his hat, the portal opened and he was gone.

A good Mexican always smuggles his family to another conpuntry and topples the dictator.

Author's Note

Hail Hydra!