The Glasshouse Butterfly

by TheShyPegasus

Rating: teen
Tags: Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Fluttershy, Tragedy, Discord, Slice of Life, Sad, Main 6
Length: 3224

Fluttershy is depressed. She's not only depressed she's struggling really badly just to get through her everyday life, but there may just be more to it than depression.

Fluttershy just hasn't been feeling herself lately. She's been feeling very... Well she's been feeling a lot of things actually, and it's driving her just a little bit crazy, but what can you do when you don't even know what's wrong with you? Feeling trapped and alone, she finally decides to take a step forward and talk to someone, and confront what's been bothering her head-on.

~I've decided to forgo my other stories in lieu of this major undertaking. I intend for this one to be my magnum opus! And hopefully one of the best Fluttershy fics there is, so please read this culmination of a many nights of depression and watching MLP (a very dangerous mixture...) Enjoy!~

Published 2016-04-09 21:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-04-11 04:12:37 UTC

I'm Okay

Fluttershy sprinted as fast as she possibly could through the maze, the anxiety of the situation mounting in her chest as she desperately searched for somepony, anypony. How could her friends just leave her like this? They surely knew how terrified she was of being lost, and especially lost and alone. But this wasn't the time for that, she had to find her way to the center, at least there they'd be able to regroup. She bolted through the maze this way and that, zigzagging through the hedges as the tears started to cloud her vision. How could she have possibly seen that loose branch lying in the path? She tripped and went tumbling head first across the path and into the hedges ahead of her. How could she have ever known that she was being stalked, helplessly running through the corridors of her worst fears? How could she have known her every move was being observed; her every thought being tapped; her every weakness and fear being carefully picked to pieces to find the root of all of her anxieties, all by the being that she was so desperately trying to get away from.

"Interesting..." Discord chuckled to himself as he simply snapped his claws and, in a flash, transformed himself into a small kaleidoscope of pink and teal butterflies, all floating deviously towards the spot where the poor, unknowing young mare hid....

~~~ o . O . o ~~~

"And Applejack's face!" The whole group burst out into a fit of furious laughter as they recounted each others transformations at the hands of Discord's corruption. Well, almost the whole group. Fluttershy simply sat quietly with her turned down and her hooves pulled up close to her chest. She didn't want to think about it, she couldn't stand to think about it, but it was there, and she just couldn't stop thinking about it...

"Fluttershy..." That meek and feeble voice called out her. His voice. She just couldn't stand his voice... "It looks like you've been... Left behind by those friends of yours, huh?"

"Fluttershy?" She was instantly snapped back to reality by that sweet, concerned voice, looking up from her trance and peering straight into a pair of big, crystal blue eyes. She blushed slightly, embarrassed as she jumped back a little, not expecting anypony to be right... there. "Fluttershy... What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"W-What?" Fluttershy asked as she blinked for the first time in a long while, feeling the wet sting of tears in her eyes. Anxiety gripped at her chest tightly as she searched desperately for an answer, any answer other than the truth, but nothing came. "N-Nothing..." She quickly turned her gaze back downward and covered herself with her mane, doing her best to hide the fresh tears that were forming in her eyes. She hated lying, she especially hated lying to her friends, but in this case, she had no choice.

"C'mon, Fluttershy!" Pinkie started cheerfully, but calmly, trying her best to make her friend feel better. "You're not still upset about being a meanie-mean mean pants while you were under Discord's spell, are you?"

It still stung though... It hurt so badly to know what she had done, the way that she had been, but it hurt even worse knowing the truth... It was so much more than just what Discord had done. She continued to stare at her hooves watching the tears drip and stain her coat. But she only stared for a moment before she raised her head up, and with her very best fake smile said, "Thanks, Pinkie. Don't worry everypony, I'm okay."

I'm okay...

Author's Note

I want to make a note that these short chapters in the beginning are a prologue for the story which will actually start in chapter 3. :twilightblush:

The Fall

Fluttershy walked through the door to her little cottage, nestled on the edge of the Everfree Forest, her head hung low and her eyes full of streaming, hot tears. 'What is wrong with me?' She thought to herself as she walked inside, kicking the door shut with a loud slam, as her sobs began to get louder. 'I'm not even sad! Why am I like this -- What's wrong with me?' It'd been about a month since the incident with Discord and life had slowly begun to return to normal for everpony. Everpony but Fluttershy at least. Every day she seemed to be getting worse, she'd just been so... Tired and sad and angry. Like today, she woke up late, she got to the spa late, and Rarity was just so... Annoying. Every word out of her mouth just made her want to drown herself in the soak! But this... This wasn't her. Sure even she had her limits, but Fluttershy would never, ever think such awful things about her friends, and nopony had even pushed her that hard at all lately, especially not Rarity.

Fluttershy dried her tears as best she could and decided she should try to make herself a nice cup of chamomile tea for bedtime. It always helped calm her down when she was stressed, and right now she definitely needed it for the ache that plagued her poor head. She put the kettle and tea leaves on the stove and went back to the living room where she lit her favorite scented candle as she relaxed on the couch, rubbing her temples slowly in tiny circles to try and ease the pain. It was nice and quiet in the room as she rested her head on the pillow. The only noises were the light breeze, outside, the settling of the house, and the low drone of the boiling tea on the stove top. But then she heard something out of the ordinary. It started out low, but gradually got louder. Was it... giggling? But just as she thought she had heard it the tea pot began to whistle loudly, drowning out the other noises in the house. She decided to write it off as her imagination as she stood up and began to walk towards the kitchen to make her cup of tea. After pouring her tea and adding a bit of sugar she headed back to her spot on the couch, letting the pleasant aromas of the tea and the candle cloud her senses. She let out a satisfied sigh as she sipped slowly on her drink, sinking back into the couch and allowing herself to truly relax. It didn't take very long for her to finish her tea and begin to feel her body getting very heavy. She let out a good yawn and stretched out her back as she cleaned up her mess and ascended the stairs to get ready for bed.

As she reached the top of the stairs she looked in through her bedroom door and saw her favorite little rabbit friend sleeping soundly in his special little bed. She couldn't help but smile at the image as she turned the corner and headed down the hall toward the bathroom. She gave herself a quick once over in the bathroom mirror, still smiling, before getting her toothbrush and a glass of water ready, but when she looked back in the mirror she was in no way prepared for what she saw... She would've screamed had she had the courage to do so, but instead she could only stand in shock as she dropped her glass of water to the ground below, shattering it into thousands of tiny pieces. The figures mouth never moved, but she heard it's words very, very clearly.

"I'm still here..."

The Bottom

"Nnnnnn..." Fluttershy groaned as she stirred in her sleep, pulling the covers up and over her head as she shifted positions to face away from the window, rolling over to the dark side of the room. She let out a hefty sigh and opened her eyes slowly as it began to sink in that she most definitely was awake. She tried her best to close her eyes and go back to sleep, but it was pointless. She was wide awake. It didn't really matter anyway, she wasn't getting any rest whether she was asleep or awake. She hadn't had a good nights sleep in months, or was it years now? She couldn't really remember how long it'd been since the nightmares started anymore. She laid there in the darkness under her sheets and thick quilt, trying her best to avoid getting out of bed. It wasn't necessarily that she didn't want to do anything, she just... Didn't want to get out of bed and have to cook and clean and she just knew Angel was going to be upset. She wanted to get up, she knew she had to get up, but she just... Couldn't. 'What time is it anyway?' No sooner than she asked the question was it answered by the chime of the town's clocktower, ringing in eleven o' clock. Fluttershy felt her bed sheets stir slightly behind her and something fluffy tickle her back. 'Oh no...' It only took a second for Fluttershy to be face to face with one angry looking, little rabbit.

"Oh! G-Good Morning, Angel..." Fluttershy said nervously in an almost whisper. He wasn't amused. He'd told her and told her time and time again about this, and he'd had just about enough of her moping around the house. He just sat there and stared at her with that look. That look that spoke volumes about how tired he was of dealing with her -- How useless she was... He just tapped his foot waiting for a response from that pony, what would her excuse be today? She stayed up too late? She had nightmares all night? Or worst of all, she was just tired? He raised his eyebrow at her exasperatedly, and Fluttershy just couldn't hold it in anymore. "I-It actually is morning this time at least... I-I'm s-sorry..." Fluttershy sat up in bed and began to sob quietly. Angel's face instantly changed from that of severe disappointment to one of genuine concern. He hadn't meant to hurt her, he was only trying to help, he just... He didn't know how to help. He'd tried everything. He tried being nice and compassionate, he tried being stern, he even tried being on his very best behavior to try and cheer her up, but nothing helped. He hopped over to his friend's side and patted her mane gently. She instantly responded by scooping him up into a gentle hug. "I'm s-sorry..." She sobbed as she held her friend close, and he simply allowed her to hold him until her crying finally died out into soft whimpers, and eventually faded into sniffles. "Thank you, Angel... I really needed that... I really am trying, I just... Don't know what's wrong with me. I'm sorry for being so difficult, I know I don't really have a reason to be this way, but I really think I'm getting better." She flashed him a weak smile. She knew it wasn't true, and she could tell that he knew it too, but there was an understanding in that moment that now wasn't the time to talk about it anymore. It would only serve to make the situation worse. "So, how about I get up and get us some breakfast?" Angel nodded with a small smile as he hopped out of her arms and out the door. She couldn't help but let a small smile of her own peak out from behind her placid expression. He was just so cute! She slowly pushed herself off the bed and stretched out her aching muscles. Did she smell? A quick flick of her wings answered her question. 'Oh my...' When was the last time she showered! She didn't have much of a choice at this point. "Angel, Momma's gonna get cleaned up real quick, and I'll be right down!" She folded her wings back down and stood in the darkness of her room for a moment longer, but quickly shook her thoughts off and made her way out the door and down the hallway to the bathroom.

~~~ o . O . o ~~~

Fluttershy turned the knob over to set her shower exactly how she liked it -- hot enough to steam up her entire bathroom. While she waited for her bath water to warm up, she decided to give herself quick look over in the mirror. She never really cared for looking at herself in the mirror. There was always something to remind her of how she was never... Pretty. She observed herself carefully in the mirror, and it certainly still looked like her. Mostly. Had she gotten thinner? It was hard to tell. Her mane and coat looked so dull these days, and it made her look so sunken in. Maybe that's why she looked... Tired. She stood and stared for a long while, picking apart her appearance until the steam began to cloud the mirror. She turned to walk away, but... Her reflection stayed behind. No she hadn't actually just seen that. It was just another daydream; She was just tired.

"Wow, you're not looking so good." Came that cold voice from the deepest recesses of her own subconscious. It giggled and sneered in her own voice, filled with venom and hatred that cut Fluttershy to her very core. "But really, what else is new?" She froze in place, never daring to look back at that... that Demon in the mirror. That cold, evil entity that wore her skin and a devilish smile that struck fear into her very being.

"Please just leave me alone..." Fluttershy begged shakily. She wasn't ready for this. It was too early to fight her. She was just so tired.

"But Flutterbaby, I thought you wanted me here!" She feigned indignation and hurt. "Alright. I'm feeling generous today, so I'll leave you be, but don't mistake Flutterbaby... I'm still here..." The being giggled maniacally as it's voice faded from the waking world and receded back into the deep reaches of Fluttershy's mind.

Fluttershy opened her eyes and found herself on the floor of her bathroom, cowering in fear. She honestly wasn't sure exactly when she dropped to the floor, all she knew was that she was terrified of that... Thing. Ever since that night so long ago she'd found herself locked in a constant struggle with it, whatever it was. She removed her hooves from the top of her head and slowly began to raise herself up off the floor. She gripped the bathroom counter, carefully pulling herself up until she was just under the gaze of the mirror. She raised herself further cautiously, peeking to be sure she was gone before standing to her full height. Steam had now fully covered the mirror and billowed throughout the room as Fluttershy suddenly remembered her entire purpose for being here in the first place. She checked one final time in the mirror before she finally decided to step into the shower and let the warm water wash over her. It felt so good on her poor aching... Everything...

~~~ o . O . o ~~~

Fluttershy hummed softly to herself as she began chopping up the vegetable for Angel's salad. She wasn't really hungry herself, but she knew Angel hadn't eaten breakfast, so she decided to make him a nice lunch. He really was trying to help, and she really did appreciate it a -- KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

"EEEP!" Fluttershy squealed in shock, dropping her knife and almost cutting herself as she jumped, startled by the sudden, loud noise. Her heart was beating a mile a minute. Who could possibly be here?? She wasn't expecting anypony, was she? She didn't really know. Then came the muffled voice from the other side of the door. She could just barely hear it over the beat of her heart resounding in her eardrums.

"Fluttershy! You in there?" It was Rainbow. What in Equestria could she want? She definitely wasn't expecting her to drop by, she almost never did unless she... Fluttershy let out a dejected sigh as she started heading towards the door, doing her best to work up a smile for her friend. The only time Rainbow ever seemed to come by was when she wanted something from her. Was it too much to ask for somepony to just drop by and say hi? As she approached the door she took in a deep, calming breath, and pulled the door open, just enough to poke her head out so that her friend couldn't see inside. She'd... Let the place go just a little bit and she'd prefer if nopony saw it right now. She'd probably clean it up later.

"Good Morning, Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy beamed as cheerfully as she could without seeming suspicious. "What brings you by?" Oh yes, what was it? Be your one mare cheering section? Go see some movie you know I won't like? Help you make some scary tornado so you can look good in the end? Really, what -- What was she thinking? She never thought such mean things, especially not about her friends...

"Oh, well... T-Twilight told me to come by and let you know that we're all gonna get together over at the Library tonight. She said it's been a while so she really wants all of us to be there, it should be pretty cool." Rainbow responded in her usual, raspy tone. Something was off though, Fluttershy could tell. Rainbow almost never stuttered unless she was nervous or trying to avoid saying something she wanted to.

"Oh, ok. Is that all?"

"Oh, yeah just uh... Are you okay?" Well that was certainly an odd question. Rainbow never asked how she was.

"What? Yeah, I'm fine, why?"

"No reason. Just thought I'd ask. So I'll see you tonight then?"

"Oh, uhm.. Sure." Ok this conversation was seriously odd. She knew Rainbow wasn't observant enough to tell that something was bothering her, and she definitely knew she would never ask of her own accord. Why wasn't she looking her in the eye? Normally Fluttershy was the one avoiding eye contact. She thought for a moment about asking about it, but decided it would be rude, so she just waited patiently for the next response.

"Sweet. Alright, well I'll catch you later Fluttershy!"

Just like that she had zipped off into the sky. "Uhm... Bye, I guess?" She hadn't even stayed long enough to hear Fluttershy say goodbye. Was something wrong with her? Did she look funny? She just took a shower less than an hour ago. She hadn't even bothered to tell Fluttershy what time the get together was. Knowing Twilight it was probably about 6 o clock, so she'd just show up around then, but still it would've been nice to have a set time. She felt a little guilty for being so hard on her friend when she'd first heard her knock... Rainbow didn't ask a thing from her, albeit she was acting pretty strange. She shook the encounter off and chalked it up to Rainbow just having a weird day, and went back to making her little Angel some lunch. Maybe this time somepony wouldn't make her almost chop her hoof off.