If you asked me about dreams and hopes, I would tell you some sappy stuff I’m sure you heard from the movies, comics, or your philosophy professor. To be honest, I don’t know the answer. I usually try not thinking about it a lot since I’m more focus on other stuff. You know? What you refer to as a “Life” all the time.
It began in Ponyville, near the Summer something festival, whatever the hell you call it. My friend, Twilight Sparkle was in her usual OCD moments, not that I blame her for pressing one-zero-one-zero on the phone to the Canterlot Psychiatric Clinic over and over. I was one of the unlucky few selected by her to assist her in this dreadful decoration. Why didn’t she get Rarity or Fluttershy to do this? She knows I don’t like doing any of this; it’s just not my style.
Now, usually, I would turn down the offer, but trust me…it’s difficult. You have no idea how hard it is to make Twilight stop bugging you to help her out on something you have no interest in. She’s far more persistent than Pinkie Pie, and I know how persistent that mare is that a solid bold NO is too difficult and far unaffected to dig into that pink skull of hers. Honestly, it can be annoying, but I have no choice after all. Twilight has the way with words…and a way to drive anypony insane.
Let’s get this straight, when I have to work, and I mean work. I don’t usually do an A-grade job at it. I work when I know I have to and if I am given an order or assignment that is not on my hour, my style of working becomes a B-average or what you consider mediocre. But hey? Mediocre is the new way to get around in society in order to keep your petition up. I don’t know, really. Just some nonsense I learned at the factory where my dad used to work in order to raise me alone.
Twilight always had me at the Town Hall, lifting drapes and tying balloons, heck, even lifting an iron ornament to make the hall look fancy. Mind you, that ornament is an iron looking sun and weighs a tone. Thank Celestia, Ditzy Doo was not around…honestly…I think she’ll be the death of me if that was so.
So, it took us hours and even two days to get this celebration ready, which I don’t really find interesting if everypony does it over and over and over again. Like come on, why not change up the pace? It can be so tiresome; I question myself why I even live here. But then again, why am I even here helping if I don’t want to?
Why do I have to put up with Twilight’s nonsense? I can say no, just to let you all know. But I didn’t. I don’t know why, but…I just wish I did. What’s the reason in helping if you don’t want to help in the first place, right?
No pony really understood me at that end honestly, but I could not blame them. Sometimes I question my own actions and realize I pretty much mess up. I remember the time my dad was trying to figure out how I destroyed everything in my room when it was actually one purple ball—a rubber one—that bounced everywhere and knocked down any glass or breakable object within its merciless path. Sheesh, the amount of anger emitting off him, the fury burning in his eyes, before the laughter that took over his system confusing the heck out of me when I started apologizing to him and all he said was, “It’s alright, even adults make mistakes.”
Now, I guess that’s something irrelevant to some message I’m trying to get across, but who cares about it anyway. Wait…never mind, you should care. I am telling you about this anyway, right?
So, back to the main event of pure boredom, once everything went swell, Celestia came and congratulate and stuff, all that frivolity and royal nonsense, I decided to just chill and drink myself into a drunken state. Cider was my favourite; there is no way anypony could deny that. It took Applejack to carry me off to Twilight’s place, thanks to her hidden-angry-courtesy. Boy, when I woke up with the biggest headache in my life, Twilight was right there at her doorstep, glaring at me like Gilda once did when I pranked her at her…parents’…n-never mind. I don’t talk much about Gilda’s family; I just hope that gryphon is alright.
For that day, even when Celestia’s sun was up till Luna’s moon took the sky, Twilight did not let up. Now, a mare that was this serious in making a good impression had every right to yell at me. Getting drunk in the middle of the celebration was not a great idea, and I should have thought about that before derping up like Ditzy does near the delivery table in the factory. To be honest, Twilight seemed kind of funny and adorable like that.
I liked her, not like that. Honestly, I don’t have any interest in dating and as far as from my preferences, I rather keep that private because I believe in what I want and nopony needs to really know about it. Everypony’s entitled to their own opinion right, but it’s better to have back up reasons for it.
Now, after that one whole day of hearing Twilight, and telling her countless times of I know or I’m sorry, it was…kind of alright. I was still annoyed though, but I gotten used to this. I actually used to a lot of things in Ponyville. I knew that Twilight’s dream was to be the best magical unicorn there was in history, but also focus more on her friends and seeing how she was doing both the princess job and friend job, I could actually see that happening for her. It made me smile to see one of the smartest ponies in the world—in my opinion—actually be my friend.
I didn’t deserve it honestly.
I don’t deserve to be anypony’s friend with the way I act.
But then again, they still are with me, especially Twilight. I don’t know what is with her. You would think a pony like that would stop talking to you after almost ruining a hard worked celebration, but Twilight didn’t. She was still my friend.
Maybe I didn’t understand it well enough since I was not that smart at school. Maybe I didn’t understand why I never bothered leaving the town and my friends just for selfish reasons. Maybe…I never understood it how I was foreordained to being one of the Elements of Harmony’s wielders. Perhaps, I was not supposed to understand. Perhaps, I was supposed to just move on blinded by acquiescence. Better than animosity. I wonder what animosity actually means since I saw it in Daring Doo’s fifth book.
You know, I usually don’t try thinking about these hopes and dreams nonsense. Sure, I want to be a Wonderbolt and…have the levels to become one, but honestly, all I want to be is just somepony, or a pony known throughout Equestria or the world. I guess you can consider that my dream and the hopes I try to accomplish in order to make true…yeah, again, sappy nonsense.
But…I did realize something on that day. Before I took off to my home, Twilight…along with the others…they too have hopes and dreams. They've been working harder than me to accomplish them that I feel like I am just some sort of heavy weight that is pushing them down. It isn’t out of selfish reasons, but more out of fear. Fear of being alone.
But I am not alone after I realized that recent event. I am actually sacrificing everything I have for them, because…well…that’s the kind of friend I am; one who will sacrifice herself to protect or see that their friend’s future is safe and prosperous. If they were all to fall off a cloud, or a hill, it’s up to me to save them all.
It’s up to me to catch them. And I have no problem with that because…
That’s me.
Author's Note
Thank you for reading. If you have any questions, I will answer them the best I can.
Love you Moderator and even you too Admin. <3
