Twilight Meets An Evil Human

by Bendy

Rating: mature
Tags: Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Crossover, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1031

An evil Human meets Princess Twilight Sparkle and says some evil things.

An evil Human meets Princess Twilight Sparkle and says some evil things.

Warning: Calm down, this story is making fun of evil Humans in Equestria fan fiction.

Note this story wad made under 10 minutes, so it's going to be sloppy even to my dangerously low standards.

Published 2014-04-30 20:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-30 20:00:01 UTC

Evil Human

It was a lovely day in Ponyville, the sun was shining, birds were singing and stuff.

Princess Twilight Sparkle was busy masturbating to lobster man porn magazine of Doctor Zoidberg as she lay in bed. Her wings were spread out in arousal and cum poured out from her pussy.

But then there was a blinding flash of light at the foot of her bed, followed the by the appearance of an evil Human, that looked like Hitler and wore a gorilla suit.

"Rrrraaaa!" the Human roared in a deep evil voice while waving his arms wildly in the air.

However, Twilight was so enthralled over her lobster man porno she didn't even notice him.

"I am an evil Human from universe 001100010010011110100001101101110011, and I have come do evil things to Ponies for absolutely no justifiable reason what's so ever. Because I'm an evil Human, and Humans are all evil!" he then laughed evilly. "Mwahahaha!"

"OK." Twilight simply said quietly, before going back to masturbating to lobster porn.

The evil Human gasped in shock.

"How can you not be impressed by my evil talk?"

"Your evil is stale. I am more evil than you."

"What?! You're Twilight Sparkle. You're a good Pony Princess." he shouted while pointing an accusing finger at Twilight.

"Oh please!" Twilight rolled her eyes as she waved her hoof." I commit xenocide on sapient species from across the universe for fun on a daily bases."

The Human looked stunned. He could not for the life of him figure out how Princess Twilight Sparkle was actually a xenocidal monster.

"But.... but.... How's that possible? You're Princess Twilight Sparkle. Therefore you are good."

"Well, Mr Human. You've obviously come to the wrong universe, where I am evil."

The Human looked deep in thought. "So there's evil versions of everyone?"

"Yes, now go away Human. I'm trying to masturbate to my glorious lobster man porn."

The evil Human disappeared in a blinding flash of light to do evil things in another universe. The evil Human reappeared in a blinding flash of light at the same spot in Twilight's bedroom again. However, this time Princess Twilight Sparkle was masturbating to a porno magazine of Nicolas Cage.

"Rrrraaaa!" the Human roared in a deep evil voice while waving his arms wildly in the air.

In response Twilight screamed, followed by throwing the porno magazine under her bed's covers and then creating a magical forced field around her body.

"What do you want?!" she shouted in shock.

"I am an evil Human from---

"Evil?!" Twilight gasped in shock. "Minsc help, evil is in my bedroom."

There was aloud crash, followed by Twilight's bedroom door going flying across the room. The evil Human turned quickly around to see another Human armed with a long, two handed sword, with the flames of a rainbow fire ... But this Human smelled of filthy goodness. He was a tall man wearing heavily plated armor with purple war paint on his bald head, his head also appeared to have many scars from previous battles. And he had a hamster on his shoulder glaring angrily at the evil Human.

"RrraaaAAGHGHH! Leave her alone! Evil one!" he shouted while charging at him.

The evil Human ducked just in time to save himself from his head been cut off from a mighty swing of Minsc's sword.

The evil Human teleported himself away just in time before Minsc was going to slice him in half with his sword.

"No! Evil got away!" he shouted.

His noble steed Princess Twilight Sparkle trotted towards him.

"Not if I can help it!"

Minsc mounted himself on Twilight's back.

"Let's go kick evil's butt!" he shouted

Twilight and Minsc disappeared in a blinding flash of light.

***

Evil Human saw his target, it was Rainbow Dash. He was going to make her cry. Rainbow Dash was sat under an oak tree reading a porno magazine of Nicolas Cage.

Suddenly there was a dark shadow over Dash. When she looked she saw evil Human in a gorilla suit looking down at her with a nasty grin on his face.

"You're ugly and no Human would ever want to cum inside you." he shouted.

"What?!" she sounded hurt. "Humans love me!"

"You're a ugly rainbow horse and no Human would ever want to cum inside you!"

"You..... you.... Shut up!" she shouted.

Tears began to form in her eyes as the evil Human laughed at her.

With the sound of thunderous hooves came Minsc, armed with his rainbow sword while mounted on Princess Twilight Sparkle as they charged toward him.

Evil Human teleported himself away to safety in another universe in Celestia's castle, along a beautiful white marble hall. Only to find Twilight and Minsc teleporting close by.

The evil Human ran at great speed away from the two down the marble hall.

***

Princess Celestia was sat on her throne. Her horn was flashing in preparation of some spell. However, the screaming evil Human that ran past her throne interrupted her spell.

"Huh?! Why is a Human in my universe?! All Humans need to be Ponies!" she gasped in shock when she saw Twilight with a Human on her back. "What blasphemy is this?!"

With a roar she teleported before Minsc and Twilight, stopping them in their tracks.

"Twilight, why is there an evil Human on your back?! And why is he not a Pony?!"

Twilight gasped in shock.

"You must be from one of The Conversion Bureau universes." she then shouted. "Minsc, kill her!"

Minsc with a mighty swing of his rainbow sword cut the head off of the evil misanthropic Pony Princess. And then he and Twilight teleported before the evil Human, they were chasing in a plain white empty universe.

The Human went down on his knees.

"Please, don't kill me. I haven't killed anyone. All I do his hurt people's feelings, because I have no friends." he cried begging for mercy.

Minsc withdrew his sword.

"Well, OK. But you have to say sorry and mean it to everyone's feelings you hurt."

"I will, I don't want to die."

And the evil Human found his path of redemption and made friends.

End