Your Mileage May Vary

by Link02

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Human, Comedy
Length: 2036

A power outage occurs at the nearby electrical substation. Chocolate fudge and a pink night sky.

Looking after Diamond Tiara is going to be difficult.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-04 07:55:46 UTC

Writer's Block

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Chapter 1

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Temporary Blog #1

Today is April 13th - a Black Friday nonetheless.

My dad is currently in hospital with my mum looking after him as he's having an operation done on his spine. I'm hoping he makes it out okay.

Anyway, I'm left to look after my cat and I'm still on my Easter break from College (which is a relief), but time sure is going by pretty fast these days. I can never seem to catch a good and proper break... but perhaps that's just down to the few things I'm interested in doing. Part of me still wants to go back to college so I can get through it quicker and earn my weekly thirty pounds, sterling. I really ought to start saving up... but I can't seem to help myself from spending it on things!

Currently, I'm stuck for writing a story for the PonyFall Collab and I can't seem to figure which character to choose since the ones I was hoping to write about (Applejack, Derpy/Ditzy) were already taken.

I really need a brainstorm for this one. Blaaaaaaaaaaaaarg.

Here's a random video for you, future self, in case you get depressed again and wish to look back to your past self for confidence.

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After finishing my first temporary blog, I get back to brainstorming for ideas on which pony to write about, checking the time to see that it was about three in the morning. Still dark outside.

I close my eyes shut tight and lean forwards slowly on to my laptop keyboard and think hard, trying my best to make the attempt to brainstorm, but nothing seems to come to mind.

Through my tightly closed eyes, I see shades of pink, managing to break through my eyelids and disturb my line of thought, having me opening my eyes to see a bright, pink light bursting through the gaps between my curtains, somehow filling my room. I open them up to reveal the night sky with a now-fading pink hue cast across it.

My bedroom light suddenly went out and my fan had stopped working, so I assumed a blackout had occurred. The whole residential area seemed to be affected as I watched lights go out, several at a time.

'Worst case scenario would be that the nearby Electric Substation had gone bust or something. Could just be a temporary problem.' That's what I thought.

That's when I smelt Chocolate Fudge coming through my window.

My face instantaneously got serious as I realized that what could be happening right now would most likely be considered impossible by most people. But I am not like most people.

I carefully close the lid to my less-than-decent laptop as it is in a state of somewhat disrepair and proceed to make my way downstairs to get my jacket and keys.

I was then faced with my pet cat Domino, alarmed. So I did what I could do to calm him by telling him that everything was A-OK and stroking his back for good measure, watching as he made his way back to the living room sofa to get comfortable again soon after.

My heart raced quickly as I made my way outside.

'I wonder which one it could be!' I thought to myself as I searched around the local area to see if I could find any sign of a mysterious character in human form.

I figured I'd have to play cool and keep calm in the case that anything involving a lack of clothing would occur. After searching the nearby alleyway first, finding nothing, I decided to head the other way down the street to the substation to check on both it's condition and as to whether or not the expected mystery guest could be found there. The substation appeared to be perfectly fine.

'Hopefully, the lights will be working, since I'll need to be able to see when I get back in.'

Laid down on the opposite side of the fence beside the substation was a young girl, probably at the age of ten or so. She wore a fancy dress and had hair colours of a light lavender hue accompanied by a white strip that made it's way around her somewhat curly hair.

That's when I realized the identity of the mystery guest.

Diamond Tiara was amongst my least favourite ponies as I'm sure she was mostly the same way with others in the brony community. Now, from being a snooty, snotty pony she is now human and in our world. What a nightmare.

I bit my bottom lip, stifling in a sound that sounded like a steam kettle slowly coming to the boil.

"God damn it" was all that I could make out from it.

She would probably prove to be the biggest pain in the flank for anyone with half the mind to save her from any potential danger, but I had to go over there and get her to see what I could do to help.

Facepalming for the inevitable, I climbed over the fence to retrieve the girl, making sure to keep in mind the minimal possibility that this might not be who I thought it was. Also, the added fact that I'd have broken the law during the process of retrieving her, having entered a danger zone that was not permitted for public access, came to mind. Hopefully, no one would have seen me. I suppose being seen carrying an unconscious, young girl with a strange hair-do at night time could be considered rather law-risky too if explanations can't be made properly, which they most likely couldn't.

Who am I kidding?! I'd get a near life sentence for such suspicious activity!

I was thankful that she was at least clothed, being one who'd likely have just been at a play or at a dining party or something at the time.

Upon approaching the fence, I lifted Diamond in to a one-arm fireman carry position and made my way over, making sure that it didn't make tears in her dress... but that's when I realized something. Some ponies may prefer or like to be clothed, but that probably didn't mean they had to wear undergarments to go with them as there would be little need for underwear and practically no use for a bra. Still, I remained calm and refused to cause any alarm as I made it the whole way over, heaving my whole body over with her on top of me.

'Damn, I guess this is what they mean by 'heavy sleepers'! HNNNG!'

I thought to myself as I felt her weight push down upon me, finally getting one leg across and then managing the other.

After getting over such a challenging obstacle, I moved her in to a cradling position in my arms as I made way to my house door only a few seconds away. Fumbling to get my keys, I shifted again to hold her steadily with one arm as I reached in to my pocket to retrieve the keys with my free hand. Diamond was now stirring in her sleep, so I decided to get her in quickly before she could start up yelling in a panic. I turned the key in the door and brought her in with me, closing the door behind us and making way with her to the living room. The lights were back on alongside the power.

"Ok. Power's back on", I whispered to myself.

One of the lightbulbs would always seem to give off a high pitched tone, but it was probably only me who could hear it. After placing her on the sofa, she began to stir as she attempted to wipe her eyes with her forearms.

I had crouched down to meet her at eye level, inwardly giggling as her hands flailed about whilst she attempted to wipe the sleepiness away.

I once again reminded myself that this was Diamond Tiara I would be dealing with, which caused my current mood to shift from cheerfulness to slight remorse. Then again, who wouldn't have taken this kind of an opportunity? Well... probably a lot of people wouldn't and would've just walked on by, pretending it was nothing or leaving it to the hands of the lousy police.

Not me.

Nevertheless, no matter who would end up in my care, I would do my best to treat them in a proper manner and to make them feel welcome in my care.

"Diamond 'Damn' Tiara. Why did I end up with you of all ponies?"

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DIAMOND TIARA BLOG #1

This 'laptop' thing looks rather confusing and I'm not really sure how it works, but I think writing something about my experience so far will help me collect my thoughts.

Also, I'm getting this... [human] 'human' who calls himself 'Luke' to do this for me. (He seems pretty- AWESOME!)

Not that I couldn't, but I'm currently having a wardrobe malfunction with my whole body! /sarcasm

I can do anything if I try, but I think I need to get used to this first. No point going in to a blind panic about it.

I've noticed that I feel a lot more...(?) [Dainty] Dainty, yes. To be honest, I don't mind the way I look.

In fact, I'd go as far as to say I look as pretty as ever! [Yeah... right.]

What are you putting in there? [I'm putting in this conversation word-for-word, in the case 'I' take a look back at this and need to jog back my memory.] Take it out of there! [Nope. It's not like anyone is going to read this unless I make the whole thing public =P] *Groaning* Fine...

I'm going to be taking a trip to town today as 'Luke' here is using his 'money' that he got from his parents to buy me a fresh set of clothing, including undergarments. After having him explain what undergarments were for I came to understanding more about how human social standards are set in the form of modesty. I didn't really see the point in wearing them besides those rather uncomfortable nappies I wore as a young filly...

[She seems comfortable with me typing this, so I won't argue]

I understand the importance of looking good in attire already, but now there's another layer underneath that's to be added. Certainly won't be wearing what he claims are his own spares. /disgust [>:/]

Apparently, Luke here tells me I'm in 'England' on a planet called 'Earth'.

He just gave this whole weird explanation of how this land works and such with a monarchy of its own.

I've never heard of a monarchy being so powerless when there's a 'government' to take the say on most matters.

It reminds me of when I was back home, where my dad would talk about politics and how economics worked and such. He was always one who kept his mind mostly on the business, but he knew how to treat me right at least... not like this pigsty I find myself in. [(Patience. So thin right now)]

To stop myself from getting bored, Luke's been showing me some of his games and toys he's got.

Now I'm not one for games, but one of his game thingies [(she's referring to my 3DS)] has a magical effect on my eyes and it's rather hard to see the '3D' that he keeps going on about, so he 'adjusts the slider' and lets me watch him play. Rather humorous I might add to see a human play a game, but these 'fingers' have such an intricacy to them that hooves alone could not hope to attain. The closest thing a pony would have to that would be through the use of unicorn magic.

I should probably ask about that... Luke seems to know about ponies but he hasn't told me why as of yet. [:D]

Anyway, time to end this 'blog'. I need Luke here to fix my mane for me. [It's called hair.]

Diamond Tiara

[I don't think you need to do that part, just so you know]

Shut up and brush my mane already.

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