Art Gone Awry

by PonyTim

It's always the overly friendly ones

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Another pony (not necessarily a unicorn) is somehow imbued with the Inspiration Manifestation spell. What happens?

“So why we the ones being called in for this again?”

Hammer’s eyelids hung half-open as she looked down at her squad, wings flapping with barely enough energy to prevent her from crashing down to earth.

Duty Bound did not even turn as she spoke up, her face motionless except for the movement of her mouth.

“We were ordered to investigate the subject and assess these allegations of dark magic use. Questioning those orders are a pointless diversion. We do as we are told in the Royal Guard”

Hammer let a long-suffering sigh. If her eyes had attempted to roll up any further into her skull, she would have been looking at her own brain. As though deciding that gravity was not worth fighting right at that moment, she dropped down the last few feet and began to

“How ‘bout you Trailblazer? What do ya’ think?”

The Earth Pony shrugged his shoulders, a slightly difficult maneuver when one is walking, and turned his head towards Hammer.

“I figure we were close and this is almost on the way to the next assignment. If there’s nothing going on, we can just move along without losing almost any time.” Trailblazer flashed a quick smile. “If there is something, then why not have the best to contain it?”

Hammer blew Trailblazer’s explanation off with a huff and an eye roll.

“Yeah, it MIGHT be fun if it was, like, some beasty screwing around or like a bunch’a cultists summoning Ms. Moon Face or somethin’, but this bloke’s a ninny ARTIST!” Hammer began wiggling her arms as though she were telling a ghost story to foals around a firepit. “Watch out adventurers, he might get PAINT on us! Oooooo!”

Hammer puffed up her chest to continue while Trailblazer attempted to stifle a laugh and did his best to hide his small from Duty Bound, but a quiet humph turned both ponies attention towards High End. The unicorn shot a glare at the due. Not that High End didn’t always have a glare on his face, as though he was constantly appraising the world and finding it to be lacking, but this look caused his eyebrows to drop a little lower then normal and his lips to bend just a little further downward.

“As neither of you simpletons have a hint of culture or sense of aesthetics, let me impart on you the fact that Artistica is the foremost virtuoso of artistry of this generation.”

Trailblazer and Hammer looked forward to hide their silently mocking smiles.

“And let me guess, he only paints the best of the best and he did a family portrait for you. Is that right buddy?”

“Um, guys? We…”

Soft Heart, the fifth member of the troop, attempted to interject but was cut off by High End.

“Indeed. The ball to host the unveiling of the painting was the subject of much confabulation among the Canterlot elite.” The unicorn’s tone turned to mocking sarcasm. “I remain perplexed as to why you gentleponies were not invited.”

“Guys, I think we’re….”

Soft Heart again attempted to speak and was again cut off, this time by Hammer.

“I know why! ‘Cus me and TB over here are too boss for that! Ya’ can keep your prancing, I’d take a night of drinking and a bar brawl over tea and cookies any day!”

“They’re called scones, you indescribably vile malefactor.”

“Oh yeah? Bite my flank ya’ stuffed shirt!”

High End made ready to unleash another sure to be cutting insult, but this time he himself was cut off by Duty Bound.

“If you both are quite finished making fools of yourselves, the map indicates that the target’s residence is past those pine trees.

High End, you will find cover on the west side of the building. I want you hidden from sight and casting a detection spell. Signal if you detect anything. Hammer, you will cover the back entrance to the south.”

Soft Heart rubbed his horn a bit in confusion.

“Um… what are I and TB going to be doing?”

Duty Bound folded the map and places it in the saddle bag resting under her wing.

“Soft Heart, us three will be knocking on the front door.”

Trailblazer wasn’t sure what he was expecting when Artistica opened the front door. On the one hoof the pony was an artist, so the idea of a rail thin whisp of a pony came to mind. On the other hand he was a successful artist who apparently did work for the Canterlot elite, so maybe he was huskier with more than a few extra good pounds. Either way Trailblazer figured, he would likely have a self-inflated opinion of himself.

The middle aged unicorn who answered the door was neither thin nor fat, but decidedly average. In fact average seemed to fit just about every descriptor imaginable. Even when you were looking directly at him, he seemed to melt into the ambiance of his surroundings.

The surroundings themselves could most accurately be described as average as well. For a pony who sold to the Canterlot elite there was little in the way of displayed wealth, from the middle-class furniture to the building construction of wood. The only thing that caught Trailblazer’s attention was the large number of art supplies simply strew all around the entire building, at least as much of it as he could see.

However, it was the stallion’s warm and friendly smile that most surprised Trailblazer. He seemed genuinely happy to see three Royal Guards standing at his doorstep. The Earth Pony was more used to ponies getting instanty defensive and start questioning what was going on. The first words out of Artistica’s mouth were a pleasant “Oh, hello there!”

Artistica looked back at his dwelling before looking back with a small laugh. “Ha! Well I wish you would have let me know I would be hosting three of Canterlot’s finest, I would have cleaned up! Oh, don’t stay outside like that, what kind of a host would I be didn’t invite you inside? Come, come my friends!”

Wish a surprising amount of force the three Royal Guards were ushered inside. Soft Heart eyes began darting back and forth and an almost inaudible whine found its way past his lips as he was physically pushed into the building. Duty Bound simply strode into the home like she owned the place and sat upon one of the plush couches. Soft Heart, after taking a few deep breaths to calm himself, sat next to his commander. The unicorn attempted to put on the stony face that Duty Bound pulled off so well, but his ears lay back against his head to indicate just how uncomfortable he truly was. Trailblazer moved to the other side of Duty Bound and stood. He couldn’t help but sport a slight smile. What could he say, the target’s good mood seemed to be a tad bit infectious.

Indeed Artistica positively glowed with excitement. His smile was so wide his eyes were practically closed. In most circumstances such a small would seem fake, but it just looked so genuine.

“Oh, I apologize! I was just making some tea! Would any of you care for some?”

The artist trotted into the kitchen and soon the trio could hear the sound of a fire being stoked.

Soft Heart cleared his throat before speaking in a reedy voice. “If it wouldn’t be too much trouble. I mean, if you’re getting some tea anyway. I wouldn’t want to impose.”

Artistica’s head popped out from the kitchen entryway. “Oh, think nothing of it!” His head disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. “Oh, and let me get you some strawberries! The local fruit market had a special on it yesterday, but I got more than I meant to. It’s more than I could eat, so you’d be doing me a favor!”

Trailblazer stole a look over towards Soft Heart. The unicorn looked back at him and could only offer a weak shrug. Before either could say anything, Artistica practically sashayed into the room levitating a couple cups of tea and a small plate of strawberries in his green magical aura. A cup and the strawberries were laid out upon the small table in front of the couch. Soft Heart nodded his thanks before taking his tea in his own telekinetic grip. He gingerly took a small sip of tea and, after apparently considering it for a moment, took another, longer sip.

“Mmmm… quite good. Thank you.”

The artist casually deflected the compliment with a weak hoof wave.

“Oh, think nothing of it. It’s the tea leaves. They were a gift from a client. Since she owed the company who makes the tea, I think she was trying to get me hooked? And want to know the worst part?”

Artistica leaned in towards the three Royal Guards, as though about to impart an important secret.

“It totally worked! I can’t get enough of the stuff!”

With that said, he downed his tea in a few long gulps before setting the cup upon the small table. With a sigh of contentment, he finally allowed his smile to drop to a much more reasonable size. Trailblazer could now see Artistica’s eyes, which he could almost swear glowed a slight greenish color. Shaking his head, Trailblazer tried to push such thoughts out. It was probably just the lighting.

“So, what do I owe the pleasure of such an expectant visit?  Are the Royal Guards interested in a commission? Oh, or do you have an order from the Princess? I’d be open to reducing my fee in order to provide her majesty with one of my paintings.”

Duty Bound stood up from the couch before speaking.

“We’re following up some on some reports the local constable saw fit to forward to the Royal Guards. There has been apparent signs of dark magic use in the area. If you have any information regarding this, we request that you share it with us.”

Artistica met Duty Bound’s stoic face with his seemingly perpetual happy smile.

“Oh, dark magic you say? Hmmm… nope, can’t say that I have. “