Narrating Dash

by BackroundVoice

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Comedy, Romance
Length: 5971

Do you ever get the feeling your being watched? Because Rainbow Dash knows that feeling better then anypony. When a ghost calling himself "The Narrator" starts haunting her, Dashie is left with no choice but to play along with his antics.

Do you ever get the feeling your being watched? Because Rainbow Dash knows that feeling better then anypony. When a ghost calling himself "The Narrator" starts haunting her, Dashie is left with no choice but to play along with his antics, and his unquenchable desire to talk over and explain every minuscule detail about her life.
It can be quiet annoying at times, but when your as awesome as Rainbow Dash, who can blame him?
Enjoy witty dialog, awkward moments, and fancy wordplay, as Dashie searches for The Narrator's reason for haunting her.
Is his reason simple? Or will it only lead to trouble?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-09-12 17:14:34 UTC

Descriptive Spoilers

The morning started like any other morning.  The sun was shining, the wind was whispering along the ground, and it’s eleven in the morning… You’re wasting your day away Dashing “Mmm… Shut up…” Miss Dashing mumbled into her pillow, horrifically depressed that her day was half way over.

“I’m not depressed” Dear Dashing lied, her boastful ego was disintegrating as we speak, it was her own fault that this was happening.  Oh ho… Now she’s angry, you could clearly see it written all over her face, it was as noticeable as a pink pony running about screaming bloody murder on a Monday.

“It’s Saturday, my day off, mind your own business” Dear Dashing was trying to stay off topic, her internal struggle to sleep in or do something productive was like watching a grown stallion walk by a baby filly on a railroad track.  Not giving two bits of his time to just kindly kick it out of the way.

“Do you make this stuff up off the spot, or do you have a script lying around?” asked the completely uninterested, and totally asleep Rainbow Dash.  She rolled her eyes and pulled over her covers, entirely aware that she just got duped.

“You did not dupe me!” Did too! “Did not!” Did too! “Did not!” our silly back and forth was all but a fools excuse to delay the inevitable fact that our- “DID. NOT!” Dashing interrupted “Look, number one! You did not dupe me! Number two, Stop calling me ‘Dashing’! And number three, I want some sleep!  So you can go back to whatever grave you flew out of and stay there!”

Dashing was grumpy.  The covers dragged over her multi-colored head was proof of this.  She was obviously very tired, because if she wasn't, she would remember that I wasn't a ‘Ghost’ as she thinks I am.

“You are a Ghost! What else could you possibly be?” said Dashing, popping her head out and sitting up strait.  But she shouldn't be asking this question, considering I’ve already told her.

Dashing rolled her eyes, as if I was some old mule reliving the ‘Good old days’ as it were.

I’m a Narrator, I describe, explain, depict, and laugh over everything that occurs around my Protagonist, namely Miss Dashing.  I’m not some ghost haunting you beyond the grave.  I simply observe and talk over your boring excuse of a Saturday afternoon.  And you know perfectly well why this is boring.

Dashing gave a stern glare towards me, as I could only be seen by her.

“Look” Dashing began, scrunching her nose, annoyed and frustrated “It’s my day off, Gallant Gale is taking over for me today as Weather Manager, Scootaloo is in Canterlot with Rarity, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Apple Jack looking for Cutie marks, I’m not at the Wonderbolt academy right now because Spitfire canceled all classes, Flutter Shy is at Discord’s place playing board games and what not, Pinkie is throwing an early Birthday party for Princess Luna, and Twilight is rebuilding the Library for the Tenth time, so that leaves me with only one thing to do, Sleep!” Dashing concluded.

...

Silence engulfed the atmosphere around us; until I couldn't control myself.

I want out! I proclaimed.  “Excuse me?” Dashing asked, quizzical as to what I had just said, but there was no need to explain any further, as just simply saying it was a good enough excuse in and of itself… So I will say it, one last time.

I. WANT. OUT!!  I proclaimed again, this time leaving a ringing pain in Dashing’s ears.  “Well who’s stopping you!?” Dashing yelled, still covering her ears in discomfort “Just go outside and leave me to my sleep already!” Dashing finished, complaining about my very existence, flipping over to her right while pulling her blanket over her head.  But once again, she failed to remember the condition of being my ‘Protagonist’.

You know all too well that I can’t just walk about without you to narrate!

“Tough Apples! I’m staying in bed!” You’re getting out of bed or I’ll spoil the ending to the last Daring Do book! I threatened, causing Dear Dashing to pop out from under her covers in a panic.

“You wouldn’t dare…” Dashing said slowly, clinging to her blanket with her already trembling hooves, preparing for the worse.

“I- I’m not preparing for the worse! You’re bluffing! T- Theirs no way you know the ending to that!” Dashing said aloud, her voice trembling from fear of my divine power.  Because what did she know, I’m a spectral being with an addiction for explaining miniscule details of a pony’s everyday life.

How would I not know what the future holds?

Dashing pulled her blanket just under her eyes, quietly muttering Please don’t spoil it!  Please don’t spoil it!  Please don’t spoil it!

Your begging won’t save you now my Dear Dashing!

“No!! No please!!” Dashing pleaded to my echoing voice.

…

Death, death was the only thing that lingered from the canyon basin.

“No…”

Ahuizotl’s lifeless corpse was heavy and drenched with blood.  I dare not look back at his mangled twisted body, for the taste of my breakfast flying out of my mouth was the last thing I wanted to experience again.

“Stop it! Stop it!!”

And I would leave him in this sad grave, if he wasn't still useful to me.

“I CAN’T HEAR YOU!! BLAH BA- BLAH BA- BLAH BLAH!!”

Because even though he was dead, it didn't mean I couldn't make him talk.  He was still useful to me… For now…

“NOOOOO!” Dashing screamed “I’ll do it! Okay!? I’ll go outside! I’ll let you do whatever you want! Just stop spoiling it!!!” Dashing yelled and screamed while flapping her wings and waving her hooves in a flustered manner.

It was good to see… Because I wanted to take a nice walk around town.

“Seriously?” Dashing muttered aloud, her eyes were sagging, her mane was messy, and her feathers were ruffled.  Dashing was a mess, and that was just putting it nicely.

Maybe you could use a wash up Dashing.

“Ya think?” Dashing said, annoyed.

A Lovely Encounter

Dashing took her time washing up, even if she didn't put much effort into showering or brushing her teeth.

Ever since I began my job as her Narrator, I've noticed that she wasn't the clean freak type that I’m so used to.  She’s very content with not fretting over the small things, and she prefers to focus on the big picture.

And in regard to this morning, she just wanted to wake up.  She turned the shower on long enough to get a quick dowse of water over her head.  She flipped her mane about, trying to shake out most of the water.

`But even then, it was still dripping wet.  Any towel she had was already soaked or too dirty to use, and she didn't have a hair dryer of her own, but prior to the short time that I've spent with her, Dashing had borrowed a hair dryer from a friend.  ‘Rarity’ I think her name was.

The hair dryer was anything but normal, it was jewel increased, forged in Platinum metal, and the buttons on the devise were of solid gold.

I would have to say, Dashing’s friend had a great degree of taste, Dashing on the other hand, did not.

Even though Miss Dash was an ego-driven show off of a Pegasus, she wasn't all that excited about using such a flashy machine.

Hesitantly, she turned on the hair dryer, to only be amazed.  This was probably the first time she had used a hair dryer.  To her, it was probably like a miniature wind turbine.  Dashing unplugged it for a few milliseconds to only attach a wire extension to it, thus gaining the freedom to fly around in a circle, while holding the dryer in front of her face with her tongue hanging out.

As if pretending to be back at her academy, zipping around obstacles like the dare devil she had always dreamed of being.  But that fantasy almost seemed short lived, as Dashing came to a screeching halt in front of me.

She just flapped in place, wide eyed like a little filly who just got caught playing with a bucket of knives.

Dashing laughed nervously “Sorry…” She said, quickly smiling and flying back to the bathroom to finish her clean up.

After setting the hair dryer aside, she then grabbed a stylish jagged comb.

Obviously it was an item of her own, I bet there is nopony but Rainbow Dash who would have such a comb.  She held it up with one hoof, and as if it were magic, she combed her mane by running the oddly shaped tool only twice through her prismatic hair.

And voila! Dashing’s brilliant mane was perfect.

Well… Perfect to her any.

It was no longer a fluffy mess, but now it was in its usual straight and ‘cool’ comb over.  Dashing stood in front of her bathroom door mirror for a good ten minutes afterwards, admiring and throwing looks at her parallel self.  Every once and a while licking her hoof to pat down a single tuft of hair that popped up.

Are you done yet Miss Dash?  She turned her head to me in irritation “Of course I’m ready!” she sternly said, ignoring and trotting past me in an almost dignified manner, making her way to the stone-cloud front door.

And instead of gently opening the door like a normal pony, she bucked it open with her back hooves, flew up into the air of the outdoors, and stretched her hooves out “I’m Ready!” she shouted with confidence.

And here I thought you didn't want to go outside today, I joyfully commented on her upbeat attitude.  “Well…Uhhh… That was before, this is now” Dashing said, crossing her hooves, and turning her head in the opposite direction of me.  Her excuse was as plain as day, and I would call her a hypocrite, but since we’re already out here, there was really no need for it.

Dashing, at the time, who still looked in the opposite direction, seeming just a little bit embarrassed from her sudden change of mood.  “Whatever!” She abruptly said while turning around to face me “We’re outside! So what do you want to do?” Dashing asked, almost expecting something exciting.

But my idea of a good time was typically a simple walk in the park.  While it wasn't all that exciting, it was still a bit more productive then sleeping all day.

Dashing rolled her eyes and mumbled something.  But, that didn't matter right now.  We were out here, so we might as well do something.  Dashing slumped, her whole body hanging by the elevation of her wings, as she was still a bit peeved by the whole situation.  “So… Where to first?” Dashing asked dismissively, I thought we could go see Twilight, she always seems to have something to do, besides…

She’s the only one of your friends who happens to be in town today.

Dashing was still uninterested, or at least she wouldn’t be if she knew Twilight had some new info on the release date for the next Daring Do Book.

Dashing then sprung to life, like a fish out of water to my interesting idea.  “Well…” Dashing began, scratching her head awkwardly as she thought of an excuse for her sudden burst of joy “I wouldn’t say it’s interesting… But I guess we could stop by Twi’s place, you know, to help her out with the library’s rebuild”

Dashing was a bit vague as to why she agreed with my idea, but I’ll just ignore it, because it’s cute to see you interested about a piece literature.

“I am not! It’s just… It’s just convenient, that’s all”

Sure… After all, with that big Egghead of yours, who wouldn’t think you’re cute, you Daring Do obsessed nerd.  I said these things all while I stared at her eye to eye with no fear, as Dear Dashing growled like an angry Timber Wolf.  Getting a rise out of her was like taking candy from a baby “More like taking a diamond from a dragon” Dashing revoked my insult.  That was impressive I must say, but considering no harm can be done to me, a baby you shall stay.

And while I stuck my tongue out and spat like an immature child, Dear Dashing reeled her left hoof back and- *Whoosh* Eek!!

“Ah! Ha Ha Ha! What kind of ghost is afraid of a little Punch?” Dashing asked, laughing maniacally with absolutely no concern for my wellbeing!  “What’s the big deal? I didn’t hit you did I?” I didn’t think you would actually try to!! “Well, you asked for it” Rainbow Dash giggled at my dismay.

… Shut up … Let’s just go… “Okay!” Dashing said with cheer…

...

We kept strolling along towards town as we passed through a grove of trees, neither of us said much besides me because of Miss Dash’s constant snorting and snickering from our little ‘scuffle’.

“I would hardly call it a scuffle” Dashing commented, still wiping tears from her eyes as she scoffed at my fear of being punched.  Isn’t it normal? Isn’t normal to be afraid of getting hurt!?  “Geez ‘Narr’ lighten up a bit, your fine aren’t you?” She asked, but it didn’t matter to me if I could get hurt or not, you tried to hit me, and those kinds of actions hurt my feelings more than anything.

“Hey, don’t try to guilt trip me buster, you didn’t give me any sentiment when I was sleeping”

You were wide awake.

“I was trying to sleep!”

Trying to sleep and actually sleeping are two completely different things.

“You were being a pest!”

I was helping you get life! Celestia knows you don’t have one.

“Says you! I’ve always- Oof!”

And speaking of getting a life, it was as if one was about to start right now. Dashing had just been prematurely ‘knocked off her high horse’ so to speak, and was neck deep in an awkward situation that she would see as soon she opened her eyes.  “Ow…” Dashing groaned in blissful pain, completely unaware, and angry that she had toppled onto her back like the clumsy baby that she was.

Oh… Sweet, sweet, revenge…

“When I get my hooves around that stupid transparent neck of yours, I’m gonna- “Uhhh… Rainbow Dash?” Dashing’s sentence was cut off by a voice that was foreign from my own.  She turned slowly from my direction upwards, looking face to face with a black maned, gray colored Pegasus, whose eyes were of ocean blue.

“Gallant!” Dashing said in surprise “W- What are you doing here?” “I- I was about to ask you the same thing” Gallant replied, laughing nervously while on top of Dear Dashing.

When Dashing realized this, her face flushed bright red, Gallant’s face however, had been bright red the entire time.

“Uhhh… Gallant? Could you, get off of me?” Dashing asked kindly “Y- Yes! O- Of course!” Gallant answered while flapping his wings as he stepped back from Rainbow Dash.  Dashing sat up, the two of them brushed the dirt off their wings from when they smashed into the ground.

Gallant Gale was a spry young stallion, he isn't a bright colored pony besides his eyes, and judging by his graceful entrance, he wasn't that bright ether. His cutie mark resembled a silver talon with a tornado behind it, most likely describing that his speed was like an Eagles talon catching its pray.  In regard to his age, I’d say he’s around Dashing’s age, maybe younger by one year or so.

And then it got quiet… painfully quiet… So quiet that it made even me feel a little… how do you say? Uncomfortable… Weird…

“So…” Gallant began “What brings you out here? I- I thought that you were taking the day off” Gallant asked out of curiosity “I am!” Dashing shouted out in a nervous breakdown “I- I just thought… uhhh…” Dashing trailed off, failing to remember that we on our way to Twilight’s- “Yes! That’s it! I was just on my way to Twilight’s place!” Dashing answered in a panic.

Trying to punch me was mean, but cutting me off mid-sentence? That's just rude!

“Why are you heading to Twilight’s?” Gallant asked, still wondering about Dashing’s activities today “I was going there to… uhhh…” Dashing once again trailed off into deep thought, this time honestly making an effort to remember.

I mean she said it herself, we were on our way to help Twilight rebui- “Oh! Wait! I remember! We- I mean I was on my way to help Twilight rebuild the library!”

…

Strike two Miss Dash… Strike. Two.

“Ya’ know just, just helping out a friend! What are friends for right?” Dashing said loudly “Right… Yeah I understand” Gallant replied while scratching his head, rustling his hoof through his mane like he had something else to ask.  “Is he going to ask me something?” Dashing whispered to me, sounding just a little afraid.  But sense you asked me… I would have to say; I don’t know.

“What do you mean you don’t know?” Dashing asked, still whispering me, but I honestly didn’t know.

“How could you not know? You can see the future can’t you?”

I said I could see the future, I didn’t say I could read ponies minds.

“Then you would know what he what would say in the future”

No, there are too many possibility’s as to what he would say.

“Then how do you know the ending to the last Daring Do book?”

Because I know that’s going to happen.

“But what about the possibility of the series continuing?”

I… Uhhh…

“You don’t know, do you?” Dashing asked, glaring at me with her scary pink eyes “I’m going to kill you” I’m already dead “I’m sure twilight can fix that” We’re getting off subject, why don’t you ask Gallant about his day?

Dashing grumbled, her cheerful mood was all but a memory to me now “So Gallant, how goes the weather?” Dashing asked, smiling while pointing a hoof to the sky.  Gallant Gale started to smile as well, happy that there was something they could talk about.

“It’s been great! I pushed any rainclouds in the area towards the South end of town, where Cloud Kicker took them to Cloudsdale for shipping, I then took my time placing Cumulus clouds in front of all the restaurants around town, providing the right amount of shade without blocking out the sun, and I was just about to go give my report to Mayor Mare” Gallant reported, proud of his hard work.

“So just a standard weather plan for today huh?” Dashing asked, sounding a bit coy as she did “Yup! And I completed it all in under forty six point fifty eight seconds!” Gallant boasted, completely content with his record time.  And even if Gallant didn't see it, but from my point of view, it seemed as if Dashing was laughing under her breath, feeling sorry for Gallant.

“Do you want to know what my time is for the standard Weather plan?” Dashing asked, still as coy and as egotistical as ever “Sure! What is it?” Gallant asked sincerely, but he really shouldn't have.  Gallant, like many ponies in Ponyville, knew that Rainbow Dash was the premiere flyer around, Dashing was fast, very fast.  But I don’t think he knew exactly how fast.

“Sixteen point nine seconds” Dashing said, acting as if it wasn't a big deal.  But if you took one look at Mr. Gale, you would see that it was a big deal.

Gallant Gale’s jaw had dropped, his eyes widened, and he looked like he had just witnessed a mare transform into a stallion.  So in short, his dreams were crushed, there was no redemption from this.  He was so shocked and dumbfounded that he didn’t even notice Dashing walk up in front of him, ruffle his mane and say “Better luck next time pal” it was almost too painful to watch.

“Wow… You really are, just completely amazing!” and with much surprise, Gallant wasn’t as heartbroken as Dashing and I thought.

“Wait, you’re ok with that?” Dashing asked Mr. Gale “Yes! Why wouldn’t I be?” Gallant responded “You are so awesome!” Gallant replied, reassuring Dear Dashing that he was in fact, ‘Ok with it’.

“You really think so?” Dashing said, who was a bit bashful from Gallant’s praise “Think so? I know so!” Gallant began “I mean, I’ve heard the rumors that you were a speed demon, but to think they were true… Wow!” Dashing couldn’t help but smile, she always loved being commented on her flying skills, it was one of the ‘perks of being awesome’ as she would put it.

“Thanks Gallant” Dashing told him sincerely, making sure to get her thoughts together “Well it was nice seeing you! Keep up the good work!” Dashing finished, concluding her business.  And with that we were back on track for the rest of the day “Hey! Wait!” Mr. Gale blurted out.

Dashing and I turned around, puzzled by his sudden outburst.

“Uhhh… Yes?” Dashing asked “Do you- I mean, are you going- no that’s not it…” Mr. Gale was mumbling something, trying to find the right words for what he needed to say.

“Yes?” Dashing asked again, this time sounding a bit impatient.

“Will you get a Chocolate shake with me!?” “What!?” ... Oh Dear ...

“I mean, if you have time later today, we could go to Sugar Cube Corner and just, hang out?” Mr. Gale asked Dashing, since she was obviously free today.

“Hold on, let me think” Dashing said, her pondering expiration indicated that she was thinking about her plans for today, and she finally came to the conclusion that other then visiting Twilight, she had plenty of time to visit with Mr. Gale.

But before she told him ‘Yeah! Totally Bro! Let’s hang out!’ the question of ‘Why?’ came to mind.

Dashing’s eyes shifted to me, but she would get no answer from me.

For while Mr. Gale stood there, patiently waiting for her answer, crazy thoughts of ‘Why?’ came to mind.  Why would he ask her? Is it because they were friends? Or does he have an alternative motive?  Could he be plotting to kill her? Dashing’s eyes narrowed, and knew that he wouldn't do such a thing.  But that doesn't mean he didn't have a secret plan.  And if it isn't murder, then there is a strong possibility that he could be…

He could be what? Dashing probably thought.

He could be in love with her!!

Dashing’s eyes shot open, surprised that she hadn't thought of this sooner.  How foolish of her, of course he’s in love with her!  Why else would he rush his work unless he was going to ask her out!?  It would be a crime if he didn't!  But how would Dashing reply? Saying yes would be simple enough right? They would simply trot over to Sugar Cube Corner, have a milk shake or two, maybe nuzzle their noses together and leave the same way they came, as good friends.

Oh… And judging by Dashing’s uneasy expression who looked normal enough but still happened to seem disgusted, was now thinking about the ‘What if’s?’ of the date to come.

What if Dashing and Mr. Gale hit it off? What if they start going out more and more often? What if she falls in love with him? What if they start to nuzzle their noses in public? What if they want to do more than just nuzzle noes? What if they start to k- k- kiss…? What if they start to kiss so much that they want to be more than just coltfriend and marefriend? What if they become so madly in love, that they get married… And then they’ll move in together, and then they’ll start a family, Dashing has always wanted twenty-six fillies and foals to call her own.

I know this because I was there when she said it.

All of these thoughts began to spin around in Dashing’s head, over thinking, and panicking about those ‘Whys?’ and ‘What ifs?’ so much that she couldn't even keep her balance, let alone keep eye contact with Mr. Gale.

Mr. Gale on the other hand looked a bit worried, was it something I said? He probably thought, when in fact, it was something he said.  Dashing meanwhile, shook free of her love-struck daze, and reconnected her gaze with Gale’s.

Dashing started to blush, the overwhelming thought of Gallant Gale liking her more than just a friend still burning into her mind.  She shook her head a few more times to make sense of the situation, to only- “SHUT UP!!!”

…

*Heavy Breathing*

“GALLANT!!” “Y- Yes Ma’am?!” “I’m going to go to Twilight’s place to help her fix the library, Okay!?” “Yes Ma’am!” “And if I have time after that, or if I need to do something else today, I will meet you at Sugar Cube Corner after I’ve done what I need to get done… Got it!?” “Yes Ma’am!” “Good! So I guess I’ll… I- I guess I’ll see you then…” “Y- Yeah…”

The two embarrassed Pegasi stood there for a brief moment, until they both had enough of this awkward conversation.

“Ok… Then I guess I’ll see you, when I see?” asked the enamored Mr. Gale.

“Uhhh… Yeah” replied the flustered Miss Dash.

“Ok, cool… Good bye Rainbow Dash” He said back with a wave.

“Uh-huh, see you later, Gallant” she waved back.

They then turned their own separate ways, Dashing turned to walk into town while Gallant flew off in the opposite direction, hoping to spare the other of any further embarrassment.  Dashing looked back at Gallant Gale, like she forgot to tell him something, but quickly turned away, thinking that 'something' she needed to say wasn't necessary.

But she changed her mind.  Dashing turned back around and flew over to Mr. Gale saying “Gallant, Wait!” Mr. Gale turned around and flinched in surprise, probably thinking he’d get soaked in the face “Uhhh… Yes, Rainbow Dash?” he asked.

“Dash” “What?” “You can call me Dash, if you want…” Dashing told him, breathing out a sigh of relief as it seemed to really bother her, Dashing was a bit more happy with things like this.

Gallant Gale didn’t know what to say at first, but he too felt a bit better by this change in pace.

“Just don’t call me Dashie, that’s a bit much” Dashing warned him, but as soon as she said it, he mentally heard the name Dashie ring in his mind.  Finding it a little cute, and downright hilarious, Mr. Gale tried his best to keep a straight face.  But to no avail, he still ended up snickering with his hoof over his mouth at the funny pet name.

Dashie- Er- I mean… Dashing on the other hoof, was not as amused.  She growled at Mr. Gale’s attempt to be considerate to her words “You got a problem with that bub?” Dashing asked all huffy, and through his uncontrollable snickering, Mr. Gale managed to say “Nope… Sorry…” Dashing rolled her eyes, now completely certain that this was a waste of her time.

“Well, see you later Gallant” she said while saluting sluggishly.

“Likewise… Dash” Gallant returned the salute.

And with that, their meeting was complete, and they went their respective ways in peace.

Well… That was a lovely encounter don’t you think?

Dashing said nothing, she just rolled eyes and kept on flying, as if nothing had transpired in the time we spent with Gallant.  But that was fine by me, after all, it didn't matter what had happened, all that matters is what comes next.

...

“Strike three…”

Pardon?

“I interrupted you again when I said ‘shut up’ … What happens after Strike three?”

…

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

A Sentence too Short

The passerby’s of Ponyville shuffled and shifted like a stream in the summer heat.  Each Stallion, Mare, Colt, and Filly had a set mind for an organized and orderly day of fun.  If only this could be said for our Dear Dashing.

The sad Pegasus stood out in the crowd like a sore horseshoe.  Mopping about in a population of smiles and happiness.

For Rainbow Dash seemed to have nothing to smile about.

Grumpy as she has been since this morning, Dashing had remained quiet ever since we left the forest.  Her head sagging, wings flapping at a steady but lazy pace, giving her just enough air to drag her hooves along the ground, and an expression that would fit like a shoe if she worked at a funeral home.

I wonder what sort of circumstances had caused her to be so slothful?

Reasons and ideas flew around in the air like a duo of vultures.  Circling round and round until an answer presented itself.  *Gasp* Could it be? Was Rainbow Dash, Love sick?  “What!?” Dashing said while she stopped flying, unable to comprehend that I had guessed why she was so tragically sad.

“I’m not sad” Dashing commented, lying while shooting her average annoyed look toward her narrator.  Oh, she’s so strong… holding back her tears for her only friend “Uhhh… You’re not my only friend” her courage was outstanding, I could tell, she may have appeared to be the strong pony she always strived to be, but I knew better “No, no you don’t” for the only thing that could heal that soft squishy and fragile heart of hers, was Gallant Gales charming voice.

“I can’t believe this” But you can Miss Dash, you can!  For I was sent by Celestia herself to guide you on a path to happiness!  “You have!?” Well… No.  But my spider sense is always tingling “I don’t even know what that means…” Me neither, so follow me my dear Dashing, I will guide you to your long awaited love life.

I then took off back toward the forest, and I knew for certain that Dashing would give chase as I led the way to Gallant Gale’s location. But I didn't hear it.  The eager flapping of my loveless friend, I was alone, looking back at the Pony I thought I was helping… Your no fun Dashing.

“Well deal with it, I’m not back tracking now that we’re already out here” Dashing said, turning back toward town.  Not that she cared mind you, but because it was convenient.  What do you plan to do with your day Dashing?

Help Miss Snarkle with the library repairs? Milk some info out of her for the next Dreadly Done book? Or will you head strait to Sugarcane Corner? And meet up with your Coltfriend.  “He’s not my Coltfriend!” Miss Dash defended herself without a second thought, making it obvious that he clearly was.

Dashing ignored me, she was getting good at that.

And I have to admit, ignoring somepony as brilliant as myself takes a little more than a tolerance for company to hang out with me.  “Well, when you've spent as much time as I have with Pinkie, you learn a trick or two” Dashing said, making light conversation by comparing me to such a nonsensical nitwit.

“Hey! Pinkie is no nitwit!” Dashing retorted, spinning round to face her narrator.  And how pray tell, is she not.  Form what you have explained to me, this Pinkamena Diane Pie is a Pony with no rhyme or reason to say or do anything except to find amusement where there is none.

“Sounds like somepony I know…” Dashing said-

…

Another play on words Miss Dash?  How crud of you… That’s my Job.

“But I’m good aren't I?” Dashing commended herself, smirking like she had beaten me.  … Well done “Thank you!” You should write a book Miss Dash. “Do you tell all your ‘Protagonists’ to do that?” Dashing asked as we started back, trotting toward our destination.  But no, I don’t believe I've told any of my Protagonists to write a book… In fact, you would be the first.

“Seriously?” She said out of shock.

“I thought you were the kind of Pony- Er… Ghost, that told everypony to write a book?” Dearest Dashing asked, but she should have been right.  If any of my previous Protagonists hadn't already written a book or two.

“Wow…” Dashing spoke out of amazement, but it was true.

I don’t recall telling you about them, my Protagonists that is.

“Nope, I don’t remember ether” What a surprise “Hey!” Dashing reacted, but it was just a joke.  Maybe.  And the usual glare had returned, like an old from years long past, Hello squinty eyes.  But there was no time for a reunion.

As a reunion with my memories seemed to have stepped in between our dance.

Dashing took a break from flying, and found a nice bench to rest under a cloud.  Recalling that Gallant had put it there for her.  But her attention then turned back to her narrator, as I regaled her with time across the ages.

…

I believe my time with the Bluebloods to be quite extensive.  “As in, Prince Blueblood?” as I recall, yes.  How are they?  “I only know about one of them, and I’m pretty sure he was a jerk” Really? How so? “Well…” Dashing then went on to retell of her and her friends outing to the Grand Galloping Gala.

An event that I have had the pleasure of attending several times.

And to hear that the snooty half cousins of Princess Celestia were still just as rude as I remember brought a tear to my eye as Dashing and I burst out laughing.  The Bluebloods were absolutely convinced that Prince Berry Blueblood had gone mad with his rambling about a voice in his head.  So if you recall any famous historical figures in history that might have been considered insane.

I was most likely at fault for that.  But other than that, Big Berry… As I called him back in the day loved to be narrated over day and night, often times he would speak to me for inspiration.  But in turn, he interrupted me on several occasions, as if I didn’t do my job right.  He was down to earth snoot.

But even so, he was still a dear friend.

And speaking of snoots, I vaguely retain the thought of a Griffin author I once shared a mind with.  “You’ve narrated for Griffins too?” Why of course my Dear Dashing.  I even inhabited the thoughts of a fly once.

“How did that go?” Oh just awful Miss Dash, just Awful.

Do you know what fly’s do Miss Dash? “Uhhh… Fly?” Dashing answered, stating the obvious.  But what was more obvious was the undeniable fact that all they do is find a thing that smells in particularly dreadful and just fly around it.

“Isn’t that what I just said?” But in the end, I guess it wasn’t all that bad.  Considering Eagle only lasted for about a day “Eagle?” Dashing asked, that would be the Fly Miss Dash.  “You named him Eagle?” Magnificent isn’t it?  A small simple thing like a fly with such a special and spectacular name.  Tis the building blocks of an epic story, wouldn’t you agree.

“Sure…” Dashing hesitantly answered.

Oh, but I’m positive that your books by Miss Yearling are far better.

“Hey, don’t get me wrong… I like the idea… I just think that the Daring Do series is a bit more… Developed?” Humph! Everypony’s a critic. Dashing rolled her eyes, and when she did, she looked back up at the sky, realizing that the sun was at the highest point of the day.  “Pony feathers Narr! We should get going if we want to help Twilight!”

Right.

And in those single seconds of thought, Dashing dashed off towards Twilight's.

Such a concentrated Pony she is.  Reminding me of the Mysterious Mar-

…

“Did you say something Narr?” Dashing asked, who then resumed her flight.

…

How strange… All this talk about the past.  I would have never remembered if it weren't for Miss Dash.  Memories of the good times leaked into my mind.  But even so, they were only trickles compared to the far more tragic times.

For as I recall… My opinion on the Mysterious Marvel… Would perhaps be a sentence too short.