The drunken adventures of Luna and Celestia: A night in pony dreams.

It was the end of yet another long and painfully boring Gala at Canterlot castle, and the Royal sisters had retreated to the castle observatory to partake in a new tradition of theirs… drinking themselves blind.

It had been two years since Luna’s return and the two of them had taken advantage of their time together to once again become the best of friends. While Celestia had been forced to appear at the Gala and wait atop the stairs to greet the guests as they arrived while Luna mingled with the guests and staff as she tried to abscond with six of the finest bottles of wine that Equestria had to offer, as she couldn’t simply ask for them anymore. After a less than royal display the year before, Advisor Kibitz had forbade the both of them from partaking in the gala wines. And although it was some what of a pain to acquire them without being noticed, Luna did love to play the rogue when she got the chance and up until two years ago, it had been a very long time since she’d been able to.

The duo sat on cushions, drinking and laughing loudly to themselves as they past recounted events. The conversation was incredibly one-sided however. Luna mostly sat quietly, listening to Celestia’s recollections of the past millennium and laughing at the humorous bits of history that had been generations passed. The time had passed quickly for them, and they now found themselves on their last bottle of wine, and neither of them having often indulged in drink, were quite drunk.

“So... me and Star Swirl are trying to contain this giant frog that drank some potions he’d spilled,” Celestia recounted to the best of her foggy memory, “And halfway through the struggle he looks over to me, and no sooner does he turn his head does the frog shoot it’s tongue out and slap him right in the side of his face.” Celestia held back her giggling while Luna laughed boisterously, “And right after he realized the predicament he was in, he just grunts out ‘damn’ and the frog pulls his tongue back and almost swallowed him.” Her attempts at control were failing her and she had to speak between bouts of chuckles as she went, “I lost it. I fell to the floor laughing hysterically at his legs flailing wildly out of the frogs mouth, and after about a minute of him struggling, he finally manages to free himself and the frog just hops on him and ribbits. I was too busy laughing to help him remove the giant frog from atop him. He just laid there cursing up a storm while I laughed in his face.” Celestia then joined Luna in laughing hysterically for a solid minute until they settled back down.

“Oh, sister,” started Luna, “it has been too long. I cannot believe I had missed out on such adventures, tis my greatest sorrow.” Luna paused with a sobering frown, “But now is not the time for regret and sadness!” Luna burst out as she clumsily rose to her hooves, successfully recovering from a stumble that almost took a table down with her, “Tonight is a night for drink and revelry!” Luna levitated her empty glass and the bottle of wine in front of her, “Ha ha, the wine... shall last... forever!” she shouted as she and Celestia burst out once more in laughter, but their joviality was cut off as Luna attempted to pour herself yet another glass, as naught but a sip came forth before petering out into drops.

“It appears that is not the case, Luna,” Celestia chuckled, “but don’t worry, I think I know where we can get some more. Come on, let’s go see what the kitchen’s stores have to offer us.” Celestia, like Luna before her, stumbled to her hooves and towards the door, beckoning Luna to follow. The pair giggled as they made their way down the stairs of the observatory through the otherwise silent halls of Canterlot Castle to the kitchen larder where they were met with an unexpected turn of events. The kitchen doors were locked tight and adorned with a sign.

Dear Princesses, due to last year’s uncouth display of your lack of self control I have had the kitchen’s wine and ale stores locked tight in order to prevent such events from happening again.

Respectfully,

Advisor Kibitz

“Damn, it appears that we have been cut off.” There was palpable disappointment in Celestia’s voice, “But!,” she exclaimed, “if they think that a simple lock shall keep the most powerful alicorns in history from their desires they have another think coming!” Celestia smile widely and shuffled to a bracing stance. Her hoof failed to catch traction upon the marble floor and she fell to the ground.

“The lock may not stop you dear sister, but the floor is surely trying its hardest.” Luna laughed at Celestia as she struggled for balance to stand upright once more.

“Indeed it is, but we shall see if the lock they have acquired puts up similar resistance.” Celestia charged up her magic and fired a beam at the lock. The bolt of magic let out an impressive flash as if smashed against the lock and frazzled into a cloud of magical yellow smoke. “Dragon scale… I should have known Kibitz would spare no expense to ruin our fun.”

“He is quite infamous for doing that.” Luna and Celestia shared a despondent sigh.

“Well, I guess we could try the stores in town.” started Celestia with renewed hope.

“Tis a worth a try, I should see no reason as to why one of the gentry would not serve us. Let us go then!” Luna headed to the front door before stopping and turning to her sister with a confused look on her face, “Where exactly are we going sister?” Luna asked her.

“Good question,” Celestia rose a hoof to her chin and thought a moment, “we’ll just take to the streets and see where it takes us.” The pair then, just as clumsy as before, made their way to the castle gate where they were met by a cadre of guards who had orders that conflicted with their interests.

“I’m sorry, Princesses, but we have specific orders not to allow you to leave the premises.”

“Do you know who I am, guardsmen?” Celestia slurred out the obvious question to her subordinate. “I order you allow us passage!”

“Sorry, Princess, but if you recall you were forced to sign some new regulations into law last year that relinquishes all of your authoritative powers upon intoxication after creating a series of impromptu laws and regulations that were found to be an 'abuse of power’.”

Celestia’s memory came back to her, “Ah yes… that happened.” she began to giggle wildly as she turned to Luna, “Luna, I do not believe this guard is in proper uniform. Do you remember what we changed it to?”

Luna immediately began laughing and pointed to the indignant guard in front of them with her hoof, “Yes this guard is indeed out of order,” she said between outbursts, “where is your sea green dress, guardsman?”

“And your regulation opal tiara?” Celestia joined in as the pair burst out in laughter in the face of the guards who, having had to suffer through looking like poorly dressed bridesmaids for a month, were not amused.

“You shall all be reprimanded for addressing us properly as well!” Celestia blurted out amidst giggles.

“Remember our full titles next time, worms!” Luna shouted through a huge smile.

“I believe that the regulation where we must address you both as ‘our most glorious and beautiful goddesses’ was one of the many frivolous and unnecessary acts that was revoked upon the signing of the reform last year.” the guard said unamused. “Now then, if that is all, we would ask that you return to your rooms for the remainder of the night.” The annoyance in the guard’s voice was enough to convince the giggling pair to return to their former location.

“Now what?” Celestia questioned Luna as they once again entered the observatory.

“I’ve not the slightest clue dear sister. We have been both cut off and shut in, twould appear we are trapped until we regain sobriety…” there was a long pause, “unless…”

“Go on.” Celestia replied with a raised eyebrow.

“I might have an idea,” said Luna with a growing smile upon her face.

“Yes?” there was a growing excitement in Celestia’s voice.

“How would you like to go dream walking?” Luna smile grew even wider.

“Oh my... it’s been so long, I’d completely forgotten.” Celestia and Luna exchanged excited looks to one another, “That sounds perfect!”

“Okay, okay, let me get ready, think of where we should go first whilst I prepare the spell.” Luna giggled excitedly and closed her eyes for a moment while she brought forth her magic. Being heavily intoxicated however, she was unable to stand and instead toppled to the floor with a heavy thud and a ferocious laugh.

“Excellent job sister, we shall be along in no time!” Celestia joined in on the laugh and the pair spent the next several moments in a humorous hysteria.

“Okay… okay.” Luna said between giggles, “I’ll just stay down here and prepare the spell, where are we going?”

“I’ve got it!” Celestia clicked her hoof on the floor, “We’ll go get Twilight, I’m sure she’ll be more than happy to join us, it’ll be such great fun!” she then plopped into a cushion and closed her eyes, “Let’s get rolling shall we?”

“Gladly.” The magic light from Luna’s horn exploded and enveloped both herself and Celestia for a few moments, after a few seconds the spectral images of Luna and Celestia arose from their bodies on the floor.

“It has been too long, Luna.” said Celestia with a warm smile.

“Indeed it has, sister. Now then, to Ponyville!” Visible only to one another, the spectral images of Luna and Celestia shot off from the tower at incredible speed, and not but a few seconds later arrived out in front of Twilight’s tree house in Ponyville giggling with excitement. The pair then floated through the walls to see Twilight, not asleep, but pouring over a book by the candlelight at her desk. “Twould appear that your faithful student does not abide by a curfew, sister, I believe we shall have to come back.” Luna then turned toward the wall, but was not followed by Celestia who, instead of following Luna was walking over to Twilight.

“Oh my!” said a now blushing Celestia as she looked over Twilight’s shoulder, “Luna, come look at this, it’s actually quite funny.” Celestia suppressed a giggle as she beckoned Luna over, even though she knew Twilight could not hear her as she was.

Luna trotted over and looked over Twilight’s shoulder to see that she wasn’t reading, but writing something of a rather dubious nature, “Is that?”

“An erotic novel? Why yes it is.” Celestia was looking at Luna with an expression that appeared to be on the edge of another burst of outrageous laughter.

“And then he approached his prize with great anticipation,” Luna began reading Twilight’s work aloud, “the growing sensation in his loins could no longer be ignored as he-” Luna had tried to suppress her giggles, but she could no longer contain it. Both she and Celestia burst out into uncontrollable laughter and rolled on the floor until they were at the point of tears.

“Sweet Goddess above, I cannot contain myself!” Luna rose to her hooves with increased difficulty and began reading once more, “He thrust himself into her, and she beckoned him to go on as she, as she… I cannot continue. If only she knew!” Luna once more broke into hysterics and Celestia, finding her humor renewed, could not help but remain grounded as she let out another boisterous guffaw at her student’s expense. She, blissfully unaware of the pair of spectral princesses behind her laughing heartily at her actions, continued scribing smut down into the pages of her book.

“This is already the best thing we have done all night. I do believe though that we should sample the fare, as it were. Come, we shall see what the dreams of others have to offer, surely Twilight shall be asleep before too long and we shall take her with us on our adventures!” Celestia said as she recovered from her laughing and stumbled to her hooves, despite being spectral, she was no less intoxicated.

“Yes, let us away to another location, perhaps her friend with the apple fetish shall provide an amusing spectacle.” Luna’s suggestion caught Celestia off guard.

“Her friend with the what now?” Celestia burst out with a laugh.

“The one with the apple fetish, I believe her name to be Applejack.”

“She doesn't have an apple fetish, she’s part of the apple family, you know? The apple farmers.”

“Farmer!” Luna said with an embarrassed chortle, “Farmer is what I meant, not fetish.”

The pair once again shared a hearty laugh as their forms dissipated into little more than white and blue streaks as they shot off toward Sweet Apple Acres. Upon arriving they entered the home and found the occupant of the first room they entered to be, not Applejack, but her bigger brother.

“While not my first pick, I do not oppose taking a quick peak.” Luna looked to Celestia, “The dreams of bachelor stallion’s have always turned out to be interesting, have they not, sister?” Luna’s eyebrows perked up at Celestia as she was met with a swift hoof to her shoulder.

“That was one time!” she replied with a snicker “Besides, I’m sure you've indulged yourself in plenty of debauched things in the dreams of others.” she smiled to her sister.

“I would be lying if I said I hadn't.” the pair chuckled once again and approached Big Mac in his bed. Placing a hoof on him, their forms disappeared and the world of his dreams came to be around them.

The two stood in the middle of an apple orchard, with little more than the breeze through the trees to make a sound. Looking around there wasn't a pony to be found, only apple trees.

“Hmmm… I do wonder where he could be. Normally they aren't very far from where you appear.” Luna pondered as they set out through the almost silent orchard. After a short while of walking they came across a tree house at the edge of the orchard, deciding that they’d not anything to lose by searching it the pair approached the ramp to the door and began to hear strange noises coming from within it’s walls. A quick glance to each other with devious smiles and they silently scaled the ramp until the voice of a filly could be heard from within.

“No Big Mac, you’re doin it all wrong! Here, lemme show ya.” The sisters stopped for a moment and looked to one another in confusion. “It’ll never fit if ya keep tryin to force it!” Their eyes widened as yet another filly’s voice could be heard from inside.

“I think if put some oil on it it’d work better.” Luna had heard this voice before.

“Wait I know that filly’s voice.” said Luna.

“Here ya go, try some of this.” came the voice again.

“Scootaloo! What in the Goddess' name are they doing in there?” Luna’s realization shook her.

“Should we even look?” Celestia asked Luna.

“Stop it Big Mac, it ain’t supposed to go there!” the first voice came again, but was more distressed this time.

“Dear sweet Goddess we cannot allow this to continue, even if it is only a dream, let’s go!” Celestia beckoned to Luna and they both rushed up the ramp. Halfway up Luna stumbled off and crashed into the ground with a heavy thud as Celestia reached the door and kicked it in.

“Halt right th-” Celestia’s words trailed off as she realized things were not as they’d previously seemed and froze in the doorway. Behind her the heavy sound of Luna leaping up from the ground and using her wings to slam into the deck outside made her jump slightly.

“Cease your dubious actions, filly fondler!” screamed Luna as also came to the realization that they had been terribly wrong. Big Mac was sitting on the floor helping Apple Bloom and Scootaloo put a wagon together, in his hooves was an axel and the improper wheel. The princesses stood awkwardly in the doorway with wide eyes while all three ponies stared at them.

“Uhhh… what now?” spoke the little yellow filly.

“We uhm…” Luna turned to Celestia. “Abort?”

“Abort.” replied her sister candidly. The two of them touched their hooves to their foreheads and disappeared from the dream back into the world at Big Mac’s bedside.

“Well that was awkward.” The duo took an extended and jovial laugh at their misfortune and set out into the hallway where they then found Applejacks room. “Here we go, let us see what you dream, Miss Applejack.” Luna proceeded to her side and touched her hoof to her and proceeded into Applejack’s dream. Celestia lagged behind for a moment to take a look around for anything interesting. After realizing that she was unable to open drawers or move objects out into better lighting to see them, she gave up and proceeded to follow her sister into Applejack’s mind.

Upon arriving to the other side she was tackled and brought down into a bush with a hoof over her mouth. After a moment of confusion, she realized that it was merely her sister who had pinned her so.

“Try to remain quiet, it is as I said before.” Luna whispered through a suppressed laugh. “Try to stifle your laughter when you see it.” Luna was giggling under her breath as she let go of Celestia and poked her head above the bush they were behind. Celestia followed suit and almost failed to hold herself back from laughing.

Applejack was laying in a huge basket of apples, rolling around in them, and making strange, unintelligible moans as she rolled in the pile of fruit. It would appear that Luna’s prior mistake of wording was in actuality, correct. After only a few moments of staring on at the strange spectacle before her, it became too much for Celestia to bear. She let out an incredibly loud and booming shriek that carried into studdering, breathless, laughs when there was no air in her lungs. Luna, knowing that their cover had surely been blown, joined her sister in explosive revelry and began rolling on the ground beside her.

Applejack quickly snapped up from the tub and saw them, and not a moment later the two of them were cast out of her dreams and back into the world as Applejack awoke with a start. After the moment of confusion that normally accompanies waking from a nightmare, she arose to her hooves and exited the room. All the while, Celestia and Luna were rolling on the floor trying to recover from the hilarity of seeing Applejack’s secret desires for her favored fruit.

“Well then,” said Luna with tears in her eyes, “I do believe that will be a tough one to beat.” she continued laughing on the floor while her sister tried to recover and get up.

“Indeed, that was quite entertaining, but the night is still young and there are yet more ponies whose dreams lie vulnerable.” Celestia almost fell over as she helped Luna to her hooves.

“Tis your turn to pick sister.” Said Luna as she gained balance.

“Hmmm…” Celestia thought for a moment, “How about Rarity, she might prove interesting.”

“Indeed, to Carousel Boutique then!” once more their forms turned to beams of light that flew across the landscape yet again to come to a stop in front of Rarity’s home.

“You know, you don’t have to announce where we’re going.” Celestia remarked to Luna.

“I do, but tis all in good fun sister. Now then, shall we proceed to our next victim.” Luna replied in a sinister tone. The two chuckled once again as they made their way up to Rarity’s room. Upon arriving they both walked up to her and placed their hoof upon her and arrived in her dream at the same time.

The sisters couldn’t do anything except stare on at the disturbing sight in front of them. Upon a lavish bed before them was themselves… tied up in bondage equipment lying exposed with their hind quarters in the air. Behind their doppelgangers on the bed was a large white stallion on his hind legs with his front hooves bound behind him and a ball gag in his mouth. And next to the stallion was a leather clad Rarity holding his leash.

“Well now princesses, I do hope you are comfortable, I’d hate to be seen as a poor-” Rarity turned around to see them standing there in horror. She didn’t say anything, and nor did they. They just stared at one another for a solid ten seconds in horrified silence. Without saying a word the pair simultaneously brought their hooves up to their foreheads and disappeared from Rarity’s dream. Out in the world they simply stood there looking horrified in complete silence, their front hooves still glued to their foreheads.

“I think we should go to Twilight’s now.” said Luna slowly.

“I agree.” The pair did not move before they turned back into their traveling forms to escape the awkward terror that gripped them. After another short trip through the air as specters, the duo had arrived outside Twilight’s home, where they stood next to one another in complete silence.

“Okay then...” said Celestia after a few more moments of quiet. “that could’ve gone significantly better.”

“Agreed.” Without their normal joviality, the two walked quietly up to Twilight who was still writing pornography.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” remarked Celestia, “I swear I’m going to send her letter tomorrow about this. It is three a.m. she should’ve been in bed hours ago, not up writing smut.”

“Judging by her friends, I’m not sure that going to sleep would stop her.” Luna giggled.

“I can’t really argue that point after what we’ve seen.” Celestia joined Luna in a short laugh as she decided where to go next. “Hmm… the quiet one that tried to treat Philomena… What was her name, ah! Fluttershy, let us go see what she is dreaming of. At this point I honestly wouldn’t mind something much more tame than Rarity’s dreams.”

“Agreed, t’would be nice to cleanse the senses with a nice meadow and small woodland creatures about now.” and with that, they were off yet again.

Upon reaching Fluttershy’s cottage Luna couldn’t help but remark on her surroundings.

“My what a lovely cottage, I remember coming here during nightmare night, tis just as lovely as it was then.”

“She does very well for herself, even though I’ve not the slightest idea what she does for money.” Celestia finished her commentary as they entered Fluttershy’s cottage and proceeded to her bedroom. Fluttershy lie tucked in her bed with Angel bunny held tightly to her beneath her hoof. “Simply adorable.” commented Celestia as they both placed a hoof on Fluttershy.

Their surrounding were nothing if not expected. They stood amidst a verdant valley surrounded by trees and wildlife. The sounds of birdsong filled the air and the cool breeze whispered to them as it passed through the trees. The atmosphere was soothing and idyllic, but ultimately this is not what the two sisters were seeking.

“Alright then, another hunt is it?” Luna said to Celestia.

“It would appear to be that way, let us go see if we can find dear Fluttershy, we might be able to join her for a picnic if that’s what she’s doing.” and with that they were off. They wandered around the perfect landscape in search of Fluttershy for only a few minutes before they found her sitting on a red and white checkered blanket next to a picnic basket, surrounded by her animal friends. Luna and Celestia were approaching from behind the party as Fluttershy retrieved several different foods from the basket and placed them on the blanket in front of her companions. Veggies for the squirrels and rabbits, some fish for the bear, the leg of a pony for-

“Good Goddess!” exclaimed Celestia at the horrifying sight before them.

“Sacrilege!” responded Luna.

“No, no, no… we’re done here.” Celestia exclaimed as she put her hoof to her head, “We’re so done.” Celestia disappeared from Fluttershy’s dream followed by Luna.

“My Goddess, Celestia, these are Twilight’s friends? I never would’ve thought that some of these dreams would be coming from them. Especially that last one!”

“Agreed, that last one was straight out of left field for me too. Ugh.” Celestia shivered in disgust.

“Well, I guess there’s always the last two, Rainbo-” Luna was unable to finish before being cut off.

“No, no, no. Let’s go to some pony that not one of Twilight’s friends, we’ve already seen fruit fetishes, BDSM, and cannibalism. I don’t want to know what strange things are happening in the thoughts of the other two.” Celestia sighed in exasperation.

“A valid point dear sister, I too believe I have seen enough. Where to then, do you know of any interesting ponies?” asked Luna.

“What about that traveling magician? The one Twilight wrote about a while back, I wonder what type of oddities her dreams would house.”

“Tis worth a shot, I see no harm in trying.” Luna laughed, “It’s not like things could get worse.”

“Don’t say that, they just might.” The two laughed once again and they took off for the location of magician’s coach.

Upon landing beside the cart they saw the sign that bore the name of their next target.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie, what a humble title.” Luna chuckled.

“From what Twilight said she’s quite full of herself.” replied Celestia

“I can only imagine.” Upon moving through the walls of the cart they were greeted with an odd sight indeed. Much like Fluttershy’s pet rabbit, beneath Trixie’s hoof was a handmade doll; a purple unicorn with a pink streak in it’s blue hair.

“No way… there’s no way that’s a doll of who I think it is.” Celestia’s smile grew wide on her face.

“It is, look at the flank, it’s her cutie mark.” Luna giggled.

“T’would appear that my little Twilight has an admirer, how adorable. This dream should prove most interesting indeed. Shall we then?”

“After you.” said Luna extending her hoof toward Trixie. The two of them did as they had before and entered into Trixie’s dream one after the other.

They were outside Twilight’s tree house, and before they could decide what to do, it was made hilariously obvious what Trixie was dreaming about. The door to the tree house swung wide open and Twilight was seen exiting the home, followed by Spike, and then Trixie who stood in the doorway as Twilight turned around to wish her farewell.

“I’ll be back in a days time my love,” said Twilight, “I’ll miss you every second.”

“Good Goddess that’s sappy.” commented Celestia to Luna.

“As shall I,” responded Trixie “be safe for me, I await your return.”

“What in tartarus is this? A romance novel?” Luna questioned her surroundings.

“One moment.” said Celestia as she put her hoof up to her head and disappeared for a few moments, before returning promptly, “I saw several romance novels on her carriage, this surprises me little.”

“Oh, sister, I have the perfect idea!” Luna burst out in excitement, “let us bring Twilight Sparkle into this dream, unawares of the situation. It would prove quite humorous would it not?” The smile on Luna’s face was quickly matched by Celestia.

“What an excellent idea, come, let us go fetch Twilight.” The two of them both looked straight ahead and with enormous smiles on their faces touched their hooves to their head and popped out of Trixie’s dream.

No sooner did they return to the world did they rush over to Twilight’s only to find that she was still up, writing erotica.

“Damn, we’ll never get her into Trixie’s dream now… Perhaps we can get one of her friends to give her a message.” Celestia saw Spike lying in his bed and went to his side. She was stopped by Luna as she reached out to him.

“Wait! Do not go into the dragon’s dream. They are never anything but horrifying messes of blood and gore, he’ll be of no help to us.”

“Oh come on, it’s just Spike, how bad could it be.” Celestia touched Spike and was sucked into his dreams, she appeared
moments later with her hoof on her head, hyperventilating. “Okay…” she caught her breath, “you were right… I guess we’ll try one of the other two. Perhaps Rainbow Dash?”

“Works for me, let us away then.”

“I never did understand how Pegasi could form their houses from cloud.” said Luna as they arrived at Rainbow Dash’s cloud home.

“Me neither,” replied Celestia, “I’d always just assumed it was their share of the magic.” Entering the cloud home they made their way to Rainbow Dash’s bedroom, where she lay on her bed with a less than reputable magazine next to her depicting a muscular stallion on the front page.

“Ugh… I am dreading this so much right now.” said Celestia looking at the magazine, “You think that ponies are good wholesome folk until you see their dreams. Then your whole perception of them is destroyed.”

“Remember sister that dreams are not always reflections of one’s self, sometimes you get random dreams.”

“Well I sure hope that we’ve been getting the outliers tonight.” Celestia sighed heavily, “Well then, here we go.” She and Luna put their hooves on Rainbow Dash and found themselves in the exact same spot as they were before.

“Did… uhm… did we go into her dream?” said a confused Celestia.

“I’m unsure, here, I’ll try leaving and coming back, let me know if I disappear and come back.” Luna put her hoof to her head and sure enough, she vanished. After a few moments she came back to the exact same spot she was in, “Assuming by the fact that you weren’t there with me when I left, I believe that we are in her dream.”

“She’s dreaming that she’s sleeping... no weird sexual fantasy, or dark desire being fulfilled? Just sleeping. Well I guess we should try waking her up then.” Celestia looked to Luna who shrugged in return. “Hey, Rainbow Dash,” she said smoothly “time to get up, Rainbow Dash, the Wonderbolts show is about the begin and we’ll be late if you don’t get up soon.” The ploy worked and Rainbow Dash was awake. She shot up from her bed and flew to the window only to see that it was pitch black outside and slouch in place.

“Rainbow Dash, we have a favor to ask of you.” said Luna, but she received no response.

“Rainbow Dash we have need of you.” said Celestia as she walked over to her. But when Dash turned around and went back to her bed she passed straight through Celestia. “Dammit we woke her all the way up… I guess we’ll have to wait for her to go back to-” Celestia was cut off but the incessant ringing of an alarm clock. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me…” Rainbow Dash left the room along the cloud floor and headed to her bathroom while Luna and Celestia sat in her bedroom.

“I guess that leaves the pink one.” replied Luna.

“Let’s head out then, see what strange trap we’re walking into now.”

The two headed off and landed themselves right in Pinkie’s bedroom, without wasting time they quickly entered her dreams without a second thought. The landscape of the dream was actually quite barren in comparison to what they were expecting. Instead of the lavish party they thought would be going on, they stood in the middle of the rock farm that Pinkie had once called home. The sisters walked around to the front of the farm house, and knocked on the door. They were quickly answered by Pinkie’s father, who was awestruck by the unexpected visitation of Celestia.

“Princess I-” he was cut off by a frustrated Celestia.

“Yes yes, where is your daughter Pinkie?”

“Uhm… why do-”

“We’re here to take her away forever, now where is she?” Celestia answered him with an unexpected bomb of a statement.

“You’re wha-” Once again the poor farmer, who was now in shock, was not allowed to finish his sentence.

“Where is Pinkie Pie? I just have a question for her!” she once again cut him off curtly.

“Why she’s out in the south field, but wh-” this dream was not the farmer’s dream for conversations.

“Thank you bye.” A slightly annoyed Celestia and a concerned Luna then stumbled off toward the south field, or what they assumed to be the south field anyways.

“That was a little harsh don’t you think?” questioned Luna.

“It was a dream figment, not like he’ll remember it.”

“Valid enough point I suppose, but it was still a bit much.” After a short distance they spotted a small pink filly with long straight hair kicking rocks around with a few other fillies beside her. “Ah, there she is.” The pair headed off to meet the small ponies and were met with an unexpected response.

“Oh hi princesses!” spoke the filly Pinkie.

“Oh good, she at least knows us.” commented Celestia to Luna.

“What bring you both to the rock farm tonight?” The sisters paused for a moment and looked around. In the middle of the day around them, and the sun sat high in the sky.

“But, tis the middle of the day young Pinkie.” a confused Luna replied.

“No it isn’t, this is just a dream. Man, for being princess of the night, you can sure be silly sometimes.” Filly Pinkie laughed as Luna and Celestia stared in disbelief.

“How do you know you’re dreaming right now?” asked Luna.

“Oh I always know when I’m dreaming, just look over there!” Pinkie pointed to something behind them and when they turned around they saw a fully grown version of Pinkie with several balloons tied about her waist floating at treetop level. After she started waving to them with a huge smile on her face. “Yep!” the filly spoke once again, “I’m always in my dreams to let me know when I’m dreaming. It lets me know I can do the really really crazy stuff. Like this one time, I saw this colt and I wanted to-” the little pink pony was cut off by Celestia’s hoof being jammed over her mouth.

“Woah there now… we’ve seen enough tonight, we really don’t want to know.” said Celestia, relieved that she’d just dodged that bullet.”

“Okay then,” Pinkie smiled, “So what did you want then?”

“We need you to deliver a message to Twilight tonight. We are… currently unable to do so ourselves and require your assistance.” said Luna.

“Caaaaaan do, so what’cha need to tell her?” the filly Pinkie was as adorable as she was cooperative, a pleasant change from their recent encounters.

“We need you to tell her to go to bed, tell her that Luna has been trying to get a hold of her in her dreams, but she hasn’t been able too.” Celestia tried to make it sound as sensible as possible.

“That’s all?” Pinkie sounded confused.

“Ooh, tell her that she’s done enough writing for one night.” Luna giggled “That ought to get her attention.”

“Okie Dokie then, I’ll be up and out of here in no time.” Pinkie jumped around making her normal spring noise as she moved towards a sizable rock on the ground in front of her.

“Do you need a little bit of help wa-” Pinkie lifted the rock up and bashed herself in the head with it, cutting Luna off and causing her to wake up with a start.

“Ooooh…” said Celestia and Luna as they winced upon their return to the world.

“I’m almost more disturbed by the ease at which she comprehended her situation than I was by the cannibalism.” remarked Celestia, as Pinkie leapt from her bed and began hopping her way through the house.

Luna and Celestia followed her all the way to Twilight’s house where she stopped, and knocked on the door. After a few moments of quiet, which Twilight was assuredly hiding her work in, Twilight appeared at the door and opened it to see who it was.

“Pinkie?” questioned Twilight as he eyes adjusted to see around her.

“I come with a message from my dreams,” said Pinkie in a ghostly fashion, “Princess Celestia says that you need to go to sleep, because Princess Luna needs to talk to you in your dreams. And Princess Luna says that you’ve done enough writing for one night.” at the mention of the second half of the message, Twilight blushed and glanced nervously to her sides.

“Oh… okay then, will do. I’ll go ahead and get to sleep as soon as possible.” said a suddenly very nervous Twilight. “Goodnight, Pinkie, thank you for the message.”

“Your welcome, Twilight, and goodnight to you too.” Pinkie then hopped back home making her little spring noise as she went. Twilight shut the door behind her and Celestia and Luna followed her inside. Twilight went straight up the stairs and to her desk, where she closed up her work and hide it away with her magic, teleporting it to a pocket dimension to assure that no pony would happen across it.

“I have to say, I’m quite impressed.” remarked Celestia, “Hiding her pornography in a pocket dimension sure is a interesting use of magic.” The sisters laughed to one another as Twilight went to her bed and sighed heavily. She took a moment before finally climbing in her bed while mentioning to herself that she was so close to finishing her last chapter. Wrapping herself up in blankets Twilight closed her eyes and began casting a spell to put herself to sleep quicker.

“Remind me to send Pinkie a gift basket.” giggled Celestia, “Alright, I think once we ask her if she wants to come along she’ll jump on board in no time, although I’m not sure if she’ll be too ready to enter Trixie’s dreams.”

“But she might not want to go at all if we give her the choice, I believe that I have a better idea sister. Now then, we’ll just wait in her mind until she falls asleep enough for us to take her.” Luna and Celestia then touched Twilight as she lie in bed, and into her subconscious they went. All was black for a few minutes while Twilight’s mind came to settle.

“Alright, we have to get her before she starts dreaming, if she starts to dream before we can get her out, we won’t be able to take her with us. Now just to wait a bit longer and she should appear.” Luna ‘s growing excitement matched that of her sister. The pair awaited Twilight’s appearance for only a while longer until she appeared in front of them.

“Ah, Twilight it’s g-”

“TWILIGHT, THERE’S NO TIME! YOU MUST COME WITH US!” Luna’s booming voice caught Twilight and Celestia completely off guard, no sooner did she finish did Luna teleport them to Trixie’s dream. “Quickly Twilight, fetch your assistant, he will be needed in the time ahead!” Twilight scurried off into the library with haste followed by Luna and Celestia who, unknown to Twilight, stopped at the door and were now looking in through the windows.

“So how long until she realizes that she’s been duped?” Celestia asked Luna while suppressing a smile.

“I’m fairly certain that it shouldn’t be too long, look who’s arrived.” Luna put her hoof against the glass and pointed at Trixie who was now walking up behind Twilight. “I’ll have to use a bit of magic, but we should be able to hear them just fine from out here.”

“Back so soon are we?” Trixie’s words froze Twilight in place.

“Trixie?” questioned a surprised Twilight.

“I wasn’t expecting you home so soon, I guess you missed me as much as I missed you.” Trixie was now immediately behind Twilight. She put one leg over Twilight’s shoulder and began kissing the sides of her neck. Luna and Celestia were close to their breaking point outside as they held their hooves over their mouths to keep from bursting out laughing.

“Trixie, I don-” Twilight was blushing bright red at this point.

“Ssssh…” Trixie hushed her, “There’s nothing else you need to do.” Trixie took her hoof and turned Twilight’s face to hers giving her a long deep kiss, it was at this point that Luna and Celestia lost all pretense of control. They began laughing harder and more uncontrollably than ever before. There was nothing that could top this, this was the pinnacle of their night. But it was still far from over.

“I…” Twilight was at a loss for words as Celestia and Luna rose once more to the window to see how things were going. It was at this point, that things started going downhill fast. Instead of running away in horror like they’d anticipated, Twilight wrapped her hoof around Trixie’s neck and they once more locked lips in a deep, passionate kiss. Luna and Celestia had now ceased their laughing and instead stared on as horrified as they had been at Rarity’s.

“This isn’t happening right now…” Celestia said in disbelief, “This cannot be happening right now.”

“I’m afraid it is sister… I’m afraid it is…” The princesses tried not to stare but found themselves unable to look away as what started out as a prank quickly devolved into debauched fantasy in front of them.

“Did we just… whore Twilight out?” asked Celestia as Trixie and Twilight began rolling on the floor in each other’s embrace.

“I… I’m not sure, sister…” Luna was equally confused.

“Are… are we pimps now?” Celestia questioned Luna again.

“We… we might be…” Luna and Celestia got up, turned from the scene, and began walking away.

“I think I’m done dream walking for a while, Luna.”

“As am I, this night has turned out… too eventful.”

“Will uhm… will she be okay without us? She doesn’t need us to get back right?”

“No, she’ll wake up when Trixie does… we’re okay to go.”

“Alright then… let’s uh.. let’s get get out of here…” The two sister much like they had done in Rarity’s dream simultaneously lifted their hooves to their heads and exited Trixie’s dream. They then silently made their way home in an instant, arriving next to their passed out forms they stopped for a moment.

“Twas fun sister... but we should not do this for some time.”

“I am okay with that, goodnight Luna, I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Goodnight to you as well.” and with that they each placed a hoof on their sleeping forms below to return to their normal forms for some much needed rest.