Luna is NOT amused!

by shardikku

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 5431

Luna has finally had enough- Celestia's constant ribbing over the years reaches its peak when she accuses the Lunar Princess of having no sense of humour. Luna's humour is just a little 'dated', that's all...

The Royal Sisters, as siblings generally do, constantly pick fault with, and have fun at the expense of each other. Celestia just has to take that too far one morning, sending Luna into a maniacal drive to find a way to get back at her. Her sense of humour is as old as she, and during the 1,000-year exile, Celestia moved with the time, while she stayed ignorant of such changes, so her methods are...'dated', to say the least.

Involving the law, a camera, some perfect timing, and a cheeky Aide, Luna will have her revenge!

Published 2014-05-05 23:50:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-05 23:50:03 UTC

Luna is NOT amused!

Far, far above the moonlit lands of Equestria, where the inky skies were dotted with so many sparkling gems, the great celestial pearl of the moon began to inch its way towards the horizon, moved with more power than most ponies could hope to imagine. The solid blackness of the night slowly faded towards the pale oranges of dawn as the stars disappeared one by one, to leave a fresh, clear sky, seemingly lit from below by the fiery orb of light that was the sun.

A great city, almost silhouetted against the dawn rise, lay on the side of a colossal, foreboding mountain that cast a giant shadow on the plains below. The city's ponies, and, in fact, all the ponies of Equestria and beyond took the day-night cycle for granted- it had always happened regularly, aside from a few minor interruptions and brief interludes during which an evil goddess, spirit, or other malevolent force had declared eternal night, or some such annoyance.

Deep within the city, the proud heart-of-hearts -Canterlot Castle- stood tall, its majestic spires and rises shining elegantly in the dawnlight. The inhabitants of the castle, the majority of them anyway, awoke at dawn. One such pony, the alicorn of legend, Celestia, regally strode towards the wooden, arched double-doors that led to the castle banquet hall, or, at this time, the breakfast hall. Celestia, as co-ruler of Equestria, could hardly look as disinterested and sleepy as a lazy noblepony, to her subjects at least, so she fussed with a knot in her pristine chest fur as she walked, and an entourage of servants bustled about her, much akin to workers on a queen bee, as they adjusted her royal finewares and brushed her luscious mane, unnecessarily as it may have seemed to bother with something so mortal as brushing a full-spectrum, spectral luminescence, blown by a constant solar wind. Needless to say, most brushes could only be used once before they began to melt or glow strange colours in the dark. She raised her head, a confident grin on her face having finally defeated her own fur's resistance as a servant dashed ahead of her and pushed open the doors for her. She nodded her thanks and strode through the hall, coming to a stop at her usual table, just far enough away from the centre that she could have some form of privacy, but not far enough that anyone could accuse her of hiding away from her subjects.

Just as soon as the solar princess had sent her order through to the kitchens, a large door, identical to the one she'd entered through, yet on the opposite side of the hall, slammed open. An alicorn, her coat a thousand subtle shades of midnight, ranging from pitch black to royal blue. She wore a black tiara and necklace, and her hooves should have been shod in equally dark shoes, but only one ornate shoe remained, which she kicked off before the door closed behind her, a servant hurrying past to pick it up. She began to walk towards Celestia's table. None dared stop her or ask anything of her as they usually might have. She seemed annoyed, really quite annoyed. As she reached the table and sat down heavily on a waiting cushion opposite Celestia, she let out a deep sigh, grumbled an order to a nervous waitress, and sank into a sulk.

Celestia stifled a smirk at her sister's attitude. Luna was several thousand years old, yet, at times, she acted more like a teenage pony than the eternal princess of the moon. “Sooo,” she began, “have a good time running the Night Court?”

She was met with a mumbled “We don't understand ponies anymore, sister.”

“Any particular reason today?”

Luna quietly shouted, a feat Celestia had never really been able to recreate, as contempt shone in her tired eyes, “These ponies! Nobles! The top of the social hierarchy! How could they bring such matters to court!?”

“What was it this time, Lulu?” Celestia smiled almost invisibly, her equally difficult-to-master ability to counter Luna's quiet-shouting.

“There was a dispute over who owned a plot of land, fairly routine really. Aside from the fact said land was a seat! The best part? It was a seat in that very court we had been dealing with for the last eight hours!”

Celestia slammed a hoof to her mouth to stop the chuckle that could spell the end of Canterlot with her sister in her current mood. She received a questioning glare, “Itchy muzzle,” she offered in explanation. “So,” she managed to say after her dooming mirth had controlled itself, “were there any other issues, or was it simply plot complaints last night?”

“Nothing much other than that, no shortage of petty complaints though.”

Celestia watched Luna's face carefully. Nothing. Nothing resembling any form of mirth at all. Just that same bored, tired expression.

“Say, Luna, was it really a plot of land, or plotland?” Celestia snorted, barely containing a giggle.

“What!?”

Before the moon could be hastily risen and 'accidentally' dropped upon Canterlot, two waitresses appeared at the table. They saw the look on Luna's face and quickly managed to squeak in unison,

“Your supper, Princess Luna.”
“Your breakfast, Princess Celestia.”

They deposited the plates of food onto the table and whipped away, disappearing almost immediately.

“Awww, Lulu! You scared away the poor ponies. You really should learn to lighten-up a bit.”

Luna passed Celestia's hay-fry sandwich to her with slightly more force than was needed, so it only burst into black flames a little bit. Celestia, in return, passed Luna's plate over to her, placing it down ever so gently and slowly that Luna had taken the piece of buttered toast from it and taken a large bite before if had even been put down. Quickly extinguishing her breakfast, Celestia levitated her own food to her mouth, pausing to say in a sickeningly sweet tone, “Aww, it's the thought that counts, Lulu.”

A plant occupied the centre of the table. At Luna's glare to her sister's words, it promptly wilted, died, shriveled, ignited, and fell to ash, along with the clay pot it had stood in.

“Might want to cool it down a little, sis.” Celestia noted, deciding to try and keep the moon hidden beyond the edge of the world, not embedded in the roof.

They continued to eat in silence, Luna's glare never faltering.

Just as the lunar alicorn was about to stand up and leave for a much-needed rest, Celestia couldn't resist one last poke at her,

“I think you'd be a lot happier if you'd develop a sense of humour, Luna.”

“We have a sense of humour, we just don't allow it to interfere with our royal duties.”

“Our lives are royal duties!”

“Your point, sister?”

“I can't even remember the last time you laughed, let alone played a prank on someone or anything…Actually, I remember you laughing ONCE. It was around two-and-a-half thousand years back, the gryphon ambassador was over to discuss grain trade prices, and he made some awful -corny- pun, and then said: “Is good joke, eh?” to which you literally said “Ha. Ha.” Get a sense of humour, Lulu!”

“Well!” said Luna, reeling from being called 'boring'- moving stars around slightly to make the recording equipment give-off near-apocalyptic readings wasn't boring! "We shall stay no more where we are to be insulted so!"

Luna stormed off, leaving an amused Celestia to finish her slightly singed sandwich and watch all of the curious ponies gazing at the spectacle of Luna's annoyance suddenly jump when the lunar princess slammed the door as hard as she could.

Luna fumed as she marched to her bedchambers, throwing her royal attire off as she barged through the door and leaped into her bed.

“We are not boring!” She yelled at no-one in particular, “We, for one, are not a teacher -which is inherently boring- nor are we a teacher of a librarian, which would be doubly boring! She's boring! I'm fun!”

Her eyes began to close, her tiredness overcoming her strop.

She'd show Celestia who was boring! She could prank ponies like, well, a princess! A grin spread over her face,

“Have at thee, Celestia! We shall see who shall have the last laugh!”

-

The sun rose, the day warmed, the ponies of Equestria stretched and yawned, casting off their sleepiness as they prepared for a new day's work. All, that is, save Princess Luna. Her eyes had reddened slightly in the extra hour or so she had been awake, simply laying there, restless. Rather ironically for the Dreamwalker, she could not sleep. Every time she tried, some sort of energy took her over, filling her mind with her and Celestia's earlier conversation, until, finally, she gave up, pulling herself from her bed and wandering over to her desk, laying her head on her desk as she thought, slowly forming the outlines of a scheme that would not only show her sister she had a sense of humour, but also that she wouldn't take insults against herself, no matter who uttered them. She grabbed several sheets of paper full of planned constellations, flipped them over, and, doing a quick maniacal laugh for dramatic effect, she grasped a quill in her magic and dipped it in her ink-pot before she began scribbling. Evilly.

Meanwhile, blissfully unaware of her downfall being planned just down the hallway, Celestia enjoyed a mid-morning break from the stresses of ruling a nation, catching up with her student, Twilight Sparkle, Princess of something-yet-to-be-determined, on a surprise visit to the castle to liberate quite a sizable section of the Great Library 'in the name of research', no doubt, or more truthfully, 'because I've finished Ponyville's library- next!'

The two ponies, princesses both, sat in the centre of a small room, laying in a nest of several plush pillows. The outwards facing wall of the room was made almost entirely of plain glass, letting the sun warm the air and bathing it in a bright, golden glow, warming the princesses as they relaxed.

They chatted idly, just enjoying each other's company and the brief reprieve from the constant Royal Facade, more commonly known as the 'I am a benevolent ruler. I do not want every pony bothering me about their petty problems to go on a forced excursion to the dark side of the moon- honest!' deception. Twilight though, had yet to master the right amount of ‘possible forced lunar excursion’ in her look, so she was either mobbed by ponies she was duty-bound to care about and solve problems for, or left alone as everyone hid from her view.

“So then, Celestia, how have you been these past few weeks?” Twilight asked in genuine friendly interest.

“Oh, fine, Twilight, just fine, thank you. Yourself?” She noted with amusement the way she was no longer 'Princess' to Twilight now, just Celestia. That had been the only real thing to change about her since her coronation.

“I've been well, thanks. The whole 'royalty' thing is playing havoc with my studies though!” She slapped a hoof against the floor, slipping on the shined marble. She fell, coming eye-to-eye with the solar princess, and muzzle-to-muzzle. A faint click snapped her out of her shocked daze, her cheeks turning pink as she realized what she was doing and scrabbled backwards.

“I am so sorry! I slipped! it was an accident! I -

Celestia's laughter cut her off, her eyes bright with humour, tears of hilarity forming as she spoke,

“Hey-hey, I think I'm a little out of your age-range, little Miss Sparkle.”

“It was an accident,” Twilight squeaked, before regaining herself, “I'm sorry about that, I was just practicing,” She let loose a small smile of her own at the inquisitive look she got, “For when I find some super-cute colt I can literally fall head over hoof for.”

They laughed together for a while at that, their constant peals of laughter putting many ears on edge in the castle.

“Heh, it's been good seeing you, Twilight,” Celestia said, wiping liquid merriment from her eyes, “But I have to attend to some matters of the state. Please leave something behind in the Great Library this time.”

“I will, I will.”

They rose in sync, the clattering of royal shoes on the floor quite masked the fillyish giggle followed by quickly receding hoofsteps. They turned, nodded to each other, as if seeing a friend in the street, and went their separate ways- Twilight dashing off with all the refinement of a young filly in a sweet shop, as Celestia ambled slowly away, sighing as she went, straightening her golden symbols of state and heading towards her daily blur of meetings and speeches.

As she was about to walk through the door, she paused, tilting her head on one side to listen to what sounded like laughter, specifically, the evil sort. She shrugged it off, continuing on her way- it was probably just another malevolent being of great power bent on taking-over/destroying Equestria, after all.

Luna could scarcely believe her luck as she put her camera down on her desk- she had been hoping for a few pictures of Celestia and her student lazing about when their duties needing them, or maybe even a rude remark about somepony behind their back, but she had hit the jackpot of timing and had managed to snap what appeared to the untrained eye to be Twilight and Celestia with their lips together, a blush on Twilight's face, and a certain sense of romance. There was dirt on ponies, and then there was this.

A legal document covered in ink blots and scribbles had a few final notes written upon it, before she seemed happy with it and placed a clean sheet next to it. She began to copy across the relevant parts neatly, creating a professional-looking legal paper.

Several minutes' copying later, Luna allowed herself a grin at her work as she put another sheet on top of it, this one simply a court request, now asking for 'the presence of one Miss Celestia' at the Night Court. She pulled out a drawer on her desk to find an ink-pad then pushed her hoof onto it before slamming it on the papers with finality, signing them with the royal seal. She then proceeded to drag herself, still smiling, to her bed, quickly collapsing into a tired slumber, a smile still on her face.

-

Several hours later, evening began to fall and Luna was just rising to make her way to her breakfast. A knock on her bedroom door woke her from her groggy 'morning' daze. She answered with a very good impression of a Timberwolf growl before she caught herself,

“It's unlocked, you may enter.” She called.

A deeply emerald hued unicorn mare stood before her, Luna's cutie mark sewn into the sash she wore. “Any letters to be taken, Miss Luna?”

Luna stared at her, remaining silent, a confused frown on her face. In return, the mare facehoofed,

“Princess, please, for the love of yourself! Do I have to go through this every night!?”

Another confused look,

“I'm your personal royal aide! Y'know, the one that constantly advises you in court, brings you private messages, carries out your requests, yada, yada. Do we need to go over the appointment of Royal Aides again, Princess? For the however-manyeth time?”

Luna blinked, shouldn't she have had to order this pony to do such things for her? Surely she shouldn't be asking about letters- those are for mailponies...

“Princess, Luna, Moonflanks, whatever! Stop thinking out loud like that- it's weird! Anyway, letters? Or any messages? Requests? I do them too.”

“Oh, yes. Deliver these to the administrator of the Royal Courts,” Luna grabbed the papers off of her desk with her magic and gave them to the unicorn, “Thank you, Miss...?”

“My name is Nightblossom!” The mare snatched the papers in her magic, turning around and tapping her flank with a hoof. A crescent moon surrounded by falling blossoms adorned it, “Night-blossom. Read my flanks! Good evening, Miss- oh, wait, I don't appear to recall your name despite the fact I've spent the best part of every night for the past year with you!”

Nightblossom stormed off, leaving a confused, but mostly hungry now, alicorn behind, staring after her.

When was the last time Celestia called a servant by name, anyway? She probably doesn't know any of their names!

Luna set off, hunger becoming more prevalent than faulting her sister's ways.

As she approached the great oak doors to the dining hall, the studs and oiled wood glinted in the light of the candles that infested the place in the evenings. She put out a hoof to open the doors, but it was slapped down. Nightblossom stared at her.

“Really, Princess? Looking like that in public? Way to set an example to your subjects.”

Luna sighed, allowing herself to be groomed with a series of brushes and combs the unicorn held in her magic. She yelped as a knot in the flowing galaxies of her mane was pulled free, earning her an amused look from the mare.

Several minutes of painfully intensive beautification later, Luna strode into the hall, her torturer having disappeared once she was satisfied. Celestia already sat by the Royal Sisters' table, watching her arriving.

As Luna sat, several servants swarmed, taking orders from the Princesses. As soon as they dissipated, Celestia leaned over to her,

“Who did your mane, Luna? I must say, I'm loving the new look!”

Celestia began to shake, liquid mirth already dampening the fur around her eyes. She pulled a compact mirror from under her necklace, turning it towards Luna.

A large bow, deep blue in colour to match her coat, rested on her mane behind her now-back, embarrassment-tinged ears,

“Nightblossom...” She said slowly, amidst Celestia's quite loud amusement, “Nightblossom!”

“Princess.” The unicorn winked in beside her, a cheeky grin on her face, “And how may I serve your moony-flanksiness?”

Luna indicated the bow with a hoof.

“It's bow, your highness, quite the rage in Ponyville, or so I've heard. The primary school, anyway.”

Luna incinerated it, flecks of burnt ash fell to the floor. No grin, no semblance of emotion even.

“Oh, lighten up!” Nightblossom and Celestia chorused, the former teleporting off with a huff, the latter prodding Luna in an attempt to make her do just that.

For the second time that day, the civilians of Canterlot were saved from destruction by two familiar nervous waitresses,

“Y-your food, Princess.”
“Ee-ep!”

The two plates were slid onto the table, the two waitresses dashing off faster than ponies had ever been known to move.

The sisters ate in silence, Celestia not daring to push the survival of Equestria's capital any further, while Luna was deep in thought.

“Well then, Mirthless One, I'm off to bed,” Celestia said eventually, receiving an acknowledging grunt from Luna, who then asked,

“Sister, what time do you wake?”

Celestia, taken aback by this pondered the meaning of such a question, but the want of sleep won out,

“Six 'o' Clock Sharp. As always. Goodnight lulu.”

Celestia left, leaving the plotting princess to finish eating, which she did. Dashedly. Before leaving the hall herself, albeit at an excited canter over Celestia's tired amble. She had a court to organise!

-

Late that night, when the world was pitch-black, lit only by the lights of the streets and the stars and moon above, the Night Court was in progress.

The court took place in the same courtroom Celestia used for the Royal Court during the day, however, Luna had forced her variation on it to ‘distinguish them’, although, in truth, that meant blacking-out the windows so the only light came from strategically placed candles about the place, giving it a slightly menacing yet dramatic look. The stands where the jury ponies and the audiences watched the proceedings from rose high against the wall, directly opposite the small stand the judge herself stood upon with a small lectern in front to rest her hooves on when she was rearing dramatically, or, more often, to rest her head upon when a particularly petty dispute occurred. A small doorway, obscured by a wall-hanging, provided a way for the royal Aide to discretely enter and advise the judge, however welcome his or her advice would be.

“This is the fourth and final case of the night.” Luna announced, wearing her full silvery regalia, her mane flowing out behind her, as she stood in front of the court of ponies. “Has the accused arrived of his or her own accord yet?” She asked, to be met with a few shaken heads and what sounded suspiciously like somepony booing. “Then! Guard!”

Several royal guards were dispatched to bring Luna's pony to the court. Their normally-neutral expressions had completely changed when Nightblossom had revealed their target, after all, it's not every day you're ordered by the Princess of the Night to bring the Princess of the Sun to justice in a royal court of her own creation.

If their orders had surprised them, the response from Celestia on the breaking-down of her door in the middle of the night as she slept shocked them to no end. Never before, even having served as the notoriously sweary Equestrian Home and Border Guard, had these ponies ever received such a blistering tongue-lashing as Celestia herself, the very image of eloquence and politeness, had dished out to them. When she had refused to move and they had had to half-carry, half-drag the protesting princess, she had made them stop several times, namely because one of the guards, known as one of the toughest ponies in the Guard, had actually started crying at a certain statement about his mother his monarch had made.

Without a trace of the respect they usually showed for their ruler, they unceremoniously threw her in a heap outside the doors of the court, before whispering caution to Luna's batpony guards as they came to receive the accused. As soon as the princess was no longer their issue, the verbally-abused guards made a general consensus to raid the kitchens and find the strongest alcohol they could which wouldn't completely kill them, and then they tried to forget some of the things their ruler had shrieked at them. Shudders ran through them all at the memory. They had a new-found fear for their ruler.

Meanwhile, as Celestia's own Guard found relief in various fluids surely intended for harsh cleaning purposes, Princess Celestia lay in a small pen-like area, fenced-in on three sides with several burly batponies blocking the other.

“Ah! Luna! I was just attacked by my own guards! The changelings must have invaded! We must-

“SILENCE!”

The shout echoed across the chamber, ringing in the ears of every pony there, leaving the batponies with their heads in their hooves, covering their extra-sensitive ears.

Every pony present was silent and still, until Nightblossom's nudge in Luna's side broke the icy stare she managed to cast at them all.

“Now then, I hereby bring this court to session.” She rapped a silver-shod hoof on the stand, “I shall begin.”

Celestia had regained herself enough that she now stood before the batpony guards and ordered them to stand aside. They didn't. She then turned to Luna, who was addressing the court,

“The pony, a 'Miss Celestia' has recently been accused of several crimes, of which we have received ample concordant evidence and several witnessing ponies wishing to testify-

“Luna.”

“-However, instead of being able to punish the offender straight away-

“Luna!”

“-due to the nature of the crimes and the perpetrator, we have been forced to bring this to the court.”

“LUNA!”

“Speak, criminal.” Luna finally turned to Celestia's increasingly shrill call.

“What are you playing at!?” Celestia yelled, many onlookers raising judgmental eyebrows at her tone, “Dragging me out of my own bed in the middle of the night for what? To be accused, wrongly, I might add, for some crime?”

“Wrongly? Wrongly accused, she says!” Luna turned to a bench to the front if the audience's stand, “Please, Nightblossom, the photograph.”

Celestia reddened and went quiet when she saw the photo. It captured her and Twilight's accidentally-intimate moment in quite a romantic light, but, more importantly, it appeared that Celestia was forcing herself upon the younger princess, a confident smile on her face compared with the blushing, worried emotion of Twilight's while the young princess was lying almost on her side, being looked down upon by the older alicorn.

Luna let a tiny grin play across her features- revenge was so sweet! But she was far from finished yet...

As the picture was magically enlarged so the whole court could see it, Celestia called up again,

“Firstly, this isn't what it looks like. Secondly, how is this really wrong? Are you trying to say mares can't love mares? My Equestria accepts all relationships!” This drew some questioning looks at Luna.

“Miss Celestia, under the Equestrian Leadership Policy, a policy which you put in place yourself, it quite clearly states that 'should the current ruler become entered in a loving relationship, they must report to the next-highest in power with details of the relationship for reasons of security and the good of the nation.’ The infamous Act Against Filly-Foolery, also stands against you, as ill-considered a rule as it was, it has yet to be officially removed. The crimes you are guilty of encompassed in these laws are the failure to report to the second in power at the time and an obvious breach of the Filly-Foolery Act.
You are to be given no voice in this matter- the evidence and the jury shall decide of you.”

Celestia beat a hoof on the floor in anger- she was tired, disoriented, didn't know what to make of this all, and above all, she wished she had just kept her mouth shut in the past so it couldn't come back to bite her.

Nightblossom moved between the jurors, taking tiny paper slips from each of them and sorting them into two distinct piles. Taking both in her magic, she distributed them on a table behind the Judge's stand.

Nopony saw the quick smile and wink that flashed between them.

“Now, my good ponies, we shall have a short break as the votes are tallied. The court hearing of Miss Celestia shall resume in exactly ten minutes.” Luna announced, rapping a hoof on her stand.

Outside the courtroom, as the audience was busy refueling itself on coffee, tea, and various energy drinks, Luna and Nightblossom walked silently past the ponies, their expressions dull and neutral. Once they were far enough away that they were out of earshot -nearing the far side of Canterlot Castle- they stopped, looked each other in the eye, then, with all the grace of a pegasus crashing into a tree, they fell to the floor laughing, eyes streaming, legs kicking as they rolled about in hilarity.

“Little Miss Sunflanks- officially a guilty Filly-Fooler! Hehehe!” Luna giggled, a rare, fillyish giggle, not generally expected of the regal Lunar Ruler.

Nightblossom simply nodded in return, not being able to herself stop laughing long enough to string together any series of sounds to communicate. She couldn't remember the last time she had found anything quite so amusing, especially at the hooves of Luna, known for her apparent lack of humour.

Nine minutes later the mares had finally escaped the throes of hilarity. They shared a quick hoof-bump of success before dashing across the castle in an incredibly un-princesslike (and un-Royal-Aidelike) manner, reaching the courtroom just as the last of the other ponies wandered in.

As they took their positions in the court, Luna found, much to her amusement, that Celestia had been given a bowl of water -yes, a bowl, presumably the Guard's joke- which she lapped at, her stare laced with something that could have been construed as hatred, loathing, anger, or several other expressions, had she not been a benevolent princess, so it was officially a benevolent hatred.

With a rap of the hoof, the court session was once again underway.

Turning to Celestia, Luna, theatrical contempt in her voice, said,

“Do you admit guilt, Miss Celestia?”

“I am not guilty of any such fictitious crime, if it was even a crime anyway!”

Nightblossom came forward at a glance from Luna, a note held in her emerald aura. Luna stepped backward, letting her take centre-stage as she announced the crowd's verdict.

“The accused is to be found, in the Royal Court of the Night, under Princess Luna,” She left a pause, watching with amusement at the deep breath every single pony there took at this moment on every trial, “Guilty of the breech of the Filly-Fooler Act. Guilty of the breech of the Equestrian Leadership Act. As the accused denied such charges, the sentence cannot be lightened.”

Luna stepped forward again, commanding attention, even the somewhat-worried gaze of Celestia, as she delivered her sentence.

“Celestia, you are hereby sentenced to one-year lunar exile, for crimes against Equestria and ponykind, through wilful neglect of duty…”
A shocked gasp echoed throughout the room, a stunned silence of such magnitude that Luna’s ears popped. It was as if she’d just sentenced someone to death! But then, for an average pony, lunar exile would be death…

“…Or you would be! Were you all in such malevolent hooves that one could bestow such a sentence upon a pony!”

A new level of surprise, the sort which most ponies in that very room had never even known existed, pervaded the room.

“So, I hereby sentence Celestia to a temporary demotion, to allow time for you to collect your thoughts and be emotionally tutored so that such an occurrence will not happen again.”

Something changed in the air as the many ponies slowly began to cotton-on to Luna’s meaning.

The regular ponies of the Night Court, Luna’s Guard, Nightblossom, and Luna herself shared the least secretive smile in recorded history at Celestia rivaled such an accomplishment with her most confused-yet-somewhat-relieved-yet-still-nervous face ever, of even before recorded history.

Celestia was hoisted to her hooves by two of the guards, their expressions fighting to stay neutral in the name of duty as they half-carried, half-dragged her along, her own expression showing her conflicting thoughts: To either lose (even more) face and yell at Luna in front of all of these ponies, or to just follow along and be glad nothing serious appeared to have happened.

In her confused daze, she hadn’t been paying attention to where they had been going. A single room, warmly lit, the door ajar, and pervaded with the sweet scent of some sort of flower. As she was pushed into the room, the guards stopped, drawing back just as an old, motherly pony appeared, her coat a light pink, her eyes twinkling kindly.

“Come on in, dear. Don’t be shy.” The pony said, and Celestia followed her into the room, “Please, take a seat.” The pony walked behind a desk, leaving the princess to sit herself upon a cushion on the floor in front of her.

A small placard on the desk read ‘Mrs. Loveheart: Canterlot Relationships Councillor.’

“We’ll be starting soon, Miss Celestia- we’re just waiting for a-” She checked a note on her desk, “-Miss Sparkle. Princess Luna tells me you’ve had some problems with your relationship-“

She was cut off by a knock at the door. A nervous-looking purple alicorn stepped in.

“Hello?” She said, “Princess Luna sent me. Um…” She looked over to the calm, smiling pony behind the desk, and her monarch on the floor.

The sound of a pony in hysterics drifted through the corridor outside, echoing through the room.

Celestia was now looking straight down, her cheeks slightly reddened, in a blush, or in rage, none could say. She raised her head, looking straight forward, her eyes narrowing; her wings spreading.

“I’LL GET YOU FOR THIS, LUNA!”

Author's Note

Thank you for reading my five-thousand words of pettiness.

Oh, I do love seeing Luna have some fun at her sister's expense. I've been wanting to do something like this for a while now.

If there are any glaring errors, I apologize. Please point them out so I can remedy them.
Any criticisms? Yeah, I could do with them too! Feel free to note anything that seemed 'off'.

Thank you again for taking time to read this, it means something to me:)