A Shocking Tease

by Xeadin

Rating: everyone
Tags: Discord, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Fluttershy
Length: 3235

Discord teases Celestia with a little cantrip. Things become a little too chaotic for the princess to handle herself.

With Discord still on the long track towards reformation, he decides to poke a little fun on Canterlot and, more importantly, Celestia. His little spell goes out of control quickly, and Canterlot becomes swallowed in a heavy thunderstorm, which forces the princess to use many different counter-measures to ensure of the castle's safety.

A short comedy fic inspired by a short scene in another story of mine.
It is NOT a sequel-- neither story's plotlines are related to one another in the slightest.

Image for cover art by ZuTheSkunk

Published 2014-05-06 04:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-06 04:20:01 UTC

Canterlot's Cloudy Day

It was a sunny afternoon in the outskirts of Ponyville. The summer days were at their greatest peak, inviting the townsfolk to go about their gardening and harvesting routines. Flowers were watered, fruits were picked, and weeds were pulled in a predictable chain of happiness and solitude from the outside wonders and distractions of the neighboring cities.

Just beyond the edge of town, the flowers and trees surrounding Fluttershy’s Cottage were in full bloom. Daisies and tulips of a wide assortment of vibrant colors danced in the wind around the edges of the cottage foundation, and a weeping willow with whip-like branches loomed over towards the side of the treehouse, casting a shadow over part of the backyard animal pen.

Fluttershy hovered about the inside of the cottage, dusting off all the nooks and crannies she could reach. She allowed the denizen critters to move out of the way for her to shape up their living space to be more inviting. Meanwhile, Discord paced around the backyard in his lopsided gait, smoothing out the dirt and filling up the feed tub for the pigs and chickens.

For the most part, he enjoyed his time at Fluttershy’s home. Granted, there were a few odd jobs that he found either intriguingly complex or fantastically disgusting. In most cases, he chose the distasteful jobs to spare Fluttershy of the heinous cleanup of the chicken coop and the renewal of a muddy pig bath. If it wasn’t for the fact that he nearly made the chicken coop, itself, trot away from the cottage, the day passed by with relative ease.

The sun was still at the highest point in the sky, and Discord stretched his arms up and over his head. He twisted his body around, releasing the built up pressure in his spine from working his way through the small archway of the chicken coop. His feet still had twigs of hay stuck between his toes. Fluttershy came out from within the cottage, carrying a bucket full of water and set it next to the chair in which Discord laid himself upon.

With the snap of a lion paw, the bucket levitated directly above him, and overturned itself. Instead of having the water gush out on him all at once, the water fell on him like a gentle shower. Fluttershy didn’t mind Discord using his powers on himself. She only wanted to keep him out of any trouble with the denizens of Equestria. He’s had a good track record since his last incident with the ‘blue flu,’ which turned out to be a fad orchestrated by none other than himself.

“Ah, I can’t remember when I last had a good ol’ shower,” he sang to himself, brushing off his skin and scales as the water continued to sprinkle on himself.

“It must’ve been a long time since you’ve last seen the sun like this, too,” Fluttershy added, taking in a deep breath and smelling the air of all the pleasant aromas of the wildflowers.

“Why yes, it has been quite a while, dear Fluttershy.” He held the brush just below his left arm and scrubbed firmly towards his elbow. “I’ve never been able to truly admire Celestia’s handy work, since I was so busy with my own work and all.” He looked up at the blazing sun, squinting at its magnificent gaze. He could hardly concentrate on his own washing, so in a short movement, he gathered up some of the water vapor that was rising from the sun’s heat and formed it into a decently sized white cloud. He threw it up just above him, blocking out most of the sunlight on him.

“This should keep me occupied while I finish my cleanup,” he said, continuing his brushing on the other arm. Fluttershy looked up at the cloud for a moment. She then dismissed it and returned to her household chores inside.

A slight breeze picked up from the south, which carried the cloud away from Discord, exposing him to the full light of the sun. He grumbled softly and set the brush down next to the chair. As soon as he looked up to the receding cotton white cloud, he felt a small amount of panic rush through himself. At the same time, he felt the need to refresh Celestia with an old, yet effective, prank. He snapped the fingers of his paw, which forced the cloud to eject a thunderous boom that shook the forest. A few leaves fell, following the thunderclap.

He chuckled at the thought. “Maybe Celestia should take a break every now and then, and escape from all the heat and drama. No harm, no foul, right princess?”

He waved at the receding puffy cloud—aimed right at Canterlot and, in particular, Celestia.

~~~~~~

Rainbow Dash flew over the edge of Ponyville from Cloudsdale, after a long day of practice with the rest of her team in preparation for the up and coming Equestria Games. She almost got caught up with her relay routines that she narrowly avoided a complete collision with a fluffy white cloud zooming past her in the blink of an eye. She gawked at the sight for a mere moment, before turning her whole body around and growling in anger.

“HEY!” she shouted. “There’s not supposed to be ANY clouds around here for the next seven days!”

She powered her way through the blue sky, chasing down the rogue cloud and halting its advance with a swift, curling fly-by.

“You don’t just get to do whatever you want around here, mister!” she pointed a hoof angrily at the white, poofy cloud. “Go back to the Everfree where you belong, and STAY there!”

At first, the cloud hung lazily before her. A strong gust brushed by, pushing the cloud right at her, causing her to spin rapidly in place. After regaining her balance, she growled menacingly—clenching her hooves together.

“HEY! Get back here! I’m not done with you!!” With another powerful thrust, she dashed right towards the cloud, which seemed to have developed an awareness for the rainbow pegasus. It dodged her various fly-bys, and even pushed her backward on a couple of occasions. She was not going to stop there, though.

“Oh, you wanna do this the hard way? We’ll do this the HARD way! Get back here, you!!”

All at once, she made one final attempt to stop the advancing cloud from reaching its destination, which she soon realized was Canterlot Castle. She spun around the cloud, attempting to redirect its advance to the south. Before long, the rainbow funnel became more intense and soon Rainbow Dash took her ability past the breaking point.

The twisting funnel overcame Rainbow’s present speed and carried her around in circles, all the while screaming at the top of her lungs as she tried and failed at regaining her bearing. Within a few more seconds, she was thrown backwards toward Ponyville, while the white cloud within the funnel grew bigger and darker by the second.

Rainbow Dash caught herself just before crashing into the top of an oak tree. She refocused her gaze towards the growing cloud. Her heart sunk as she caught a glimpse of the strengthening storm cloud sprouted from her rainbow funnel. She flew as close to the castle as she could, while keeping her distance from the growing cloud that would soon spray torrential rain and send bolts of lightning down.

She cupped her hooves in front of her mouth. “INCOMING!!! THUNDERSTORM!!!”

~~~~~~

Discord turned the lawn chair around so that he could get a good view of the castle from the back of the cottage. He sat down on it once again, relaxing his feet and arms, and stretching his weathered bones.

Fluttershy flew out of the cottage, shivering in fright from the sudden thunderclap that shook nearby. She saw Discord lounging on the chair, sipping some sort of clear citrusy cocktail that he summoned from out of thin air. He wore a pair of large sunglasses and he had his legs crossed over.

“Discord?” she asked. “What was all the commotion about?”

“A—what now?” he turned his head to the yellow Pegasus who fluttered next to his chair, still shivering slightly. “Oh, you mean the thing with the thunderclap and…”

Fluttershy nodded.

“Well, you see, Fluttershy, I always find a need to liven up Celestia’s days with a little tease every now and then—just to give her something to think about. There’s no harm done, and nopony to transform. It’s just a good ol’—”

“Rain cloud?” Fluttershy interrupted. Discord turned back to see that his tiny speck of white fluff had morphed itself into a rather large, dark storm cloud. He lowered his sunglasses slightly to get a more decent look.

“Oh dear. That wasn’t supposed to happen.” He took another sip of the clear cocktail.

~~~~~~

Celestia sat in the middle of a garden façade, overlooking the north end of Equestria. The sun shone through the hanging troths of vines and various plants, illuminating the space with a soft, bright glow. She had a bundle of large red grapes hovering just before her, and she ate one of the juicy morsels at a time.

A single servant, a coffee-coated, red-maned mare, sat behind an easel with a large wooden frame draped with a piece of canvas. The canvas had the incomplete charcoal sketch of Celestia in her pose. The mare poked her head out from behind the easel from time to time, getting a good look of the princess in her full glory. The artist found it rather frustrating that every time she looked at the princess, she had moved ever so slightly while eating her bundle of grapes.

“I hate to interrupt your moment, princess,” the mare spoke in a classy, high pitched tone. “But could you please try and stay still for the painting? I can’t put in the correct markings if you keep on moving around.”

Celestia rotated her eyes toward the mare for a moment, smiling in complacency. “My apologies, Madame Pastel. I enjoy a bite to eat every now and then in the sun.”

“I understand, princess, but these paintings are often very tedious. The moment can be easily ruined when you move around too much. The complexity of the paint stroke cannot be easily undone.”

It was as if someone had turned off the light, or, rather, turned off her sun. Both Celestia and Pastel looked up to see a large, dark rain cloud looming above the castle. The cloud barely grazed the top of the mountain, as it quietly halted its advance. Within a few moments, a heavy downpour assaulted the castle, drenching both mares and wiping the charcoal off of the canvas. Pastel gasped in fright. “My masterpiece!”

At the same time, Celestia gawked at the dark raincloud. “My sun! What happened—” she had a sudden realization of who could’ve been behind the melancholy. “Discord.” She remembered the last time that he sent a large storm cloud above most of Equestria during the first few days of summer. It wasn’t as large of a cloud, yet it grabbed enough attention to cause a small amount of panic at first. Ponies fled through the streets which became barren wet within minutes, and the guards stationed next to building entryways hid underneath the awnings if the entrances, blocking some from others trying to escape the flash monsoon.

Celestia flew out from the façade, and landed just shy of the barracks. She bust the door open, grabbing the attention of all of the guards stationed within. They all saluted to her.

“Where’s the captain?” she demanded.

“He’s in his quarters, drying himself off, your majesty,” one of the newest guards said, still trying on a new set of golden armor.

She stamped her hooves to the ground, causing the rest of the guards to cower before her presence. She trotted to the captain’s quarters, and knocked on the door.

“Just five more minutes, lads! I need time to dry my stuff off from the rain,” a voice shouted from the other side. There was quite a bit of rustling and clanging of metal from within.

Celestia cleared her throat. “No time for games, Captain Firestorm.”

“Princess Celestia!?” Firestorm shouted in surprise. In almost a mere second, the door opened, revealing a bright orange stallion with a fiery red mane—damp from the sudden downpour. He shook from head to toe, insecure of his present appearance. “I deeply regret not having my uniform on before you, princess—”

“It’s alright, captain,” she interrupted, holding a hoof out before him. She lowered it to allow his full attention.

“What is it that you require, princess?”

“I’ll need a few of your squadrons of highly-trained pegasus guards on stand-by for weather control. If I can’t stop this storm myself, I’ll need their help in order to disperse it.” The windows lit up, and a crack of thunder rang through the barracks. The situation was becoming more desperate by the minute.

Firestorm saluted. “Yes, your majesty!” He retreated inside his room for another minute. The door opened back up, revealing Firestorm adorned in his golden chestplate armor and helmet. “Attention! Team fliers!” He stomped on his hooves, grabbing the attention of the Pegasus guards, most of which were already adorned in their respective armor outfits. The rest had partially suited up before receiving the captain’s attention.

“I need team leaders Pale Wing, Flash Sentry, and Frost Bite to gather up all of your squadron for stand-by on the princess’s orders for weather maintenance.”

“Yes, sir!” the three stallions saluted, who were at the front of the gathering.

“It looks like it’s going to be a bit of a challenge, sir,” one of the new guards raised her hoof.

“It may look that way, Leafette, but nopony on this team has ever given up from a challenge before—not before her majesty.” He stood tall, glancing over all the other guards. “Be ready to go by the time the princess gives the order.”

“Yes, sir!” all of the guards replied and saluted in unison.

Celestia was already out of the barracks when the guards were dispersed from their brief meetup. The rain had intensified, turning much of the city’s streets into rivers, and drastically reduced visibility all around the castle. Another flash of light lit up the castle briefly, creating visible silhouettes in the dark, murky weather. Another crack of thunder rumbled through the buildings, vibrating the ground below her hooves.

She drew a small focus of energy towards the sun, which caused it to aim its radiating heat to pinpoint the thundercloud directly. For a few minutes, Celestia focused hard and long on the cloud, but there was no change in the weather. She spread her wings and flew up into the thickest parts of the cloud, blocking out all light and inviting the gale-force winds to whip across her mane. It was difficult to retain her balance, and soon found herself twirling around in the maelstrom, losing control of her own flight pattern.

She was finally thrown out of the cloud, unable to regain her bearing. She headed straight for the ground of the castle, screaming wildly. A streak of rainbow flashed across her vision, and felt a body collide with hers. She blanked out for a second before her vision came back. She saw Rainbow Dash carrying her toward safety.

“I gotcha, princess!”

Celestia sighed in relief. She was gently lowered to the ground, where she dizzily stammered about on her hooves. She shook her head, and stood straight.

“Thank you, Rainbow Dash.” She whistled loudly, grabbing the attention of Firestorm. He came out from the barracks, fully adorned in his golden armor, already soaked from his earlier exposure. The storm got worse, and the winds furiously blew across the castle walls—no longer sparing any subtlety.

“Time to get your troops up there, captain!” she shouted, overcoming the howling winds that blew across them.

“Yes, princess!” Firestorm shouted back. He pulled out a curved horn and blew into it, emanating an ear-piercing note that easily overcame the gale-force winds.

Several lines of Pegasus guards exited from separate doors of the barracks, heading right toward the center of the storm cloud. They spread themselves out evenly, spinning in the opposite direction of the swirling winds. A few minutes pass by, and the guards were still fighting the ever-increasing winds, which would soon halt their attempts. One by one, more of the pegasi lost control of their flight, causing them to bump right into another, creating a troubling chain reaction.

It was certainly strange for a storm to be this persistent, and powerful. Rainbow Dash could only think of one solution: she had to be the one to end the storm. She figured that if she could start a reaction with a rainbow funnel, she could end one with a sonic rainboom. She took flight up towards the spinning raincloud. The thick, dark fog clouded her eyesight, until she emerged right above it. She continued to gain some more distance above the storm cloud, which the was relatively calm above. ‘Perfect,’ she thought to herself.

She dove back down towards the cloud, pumping in as much speed as her wings could throw in. Her eyesight became slightly distorted, and she pushed herself for one final flap just before entering the cloud.

Upon entering the cloud, the air around her burst in an expanding display of color, ripping the rogue cloud apart and ending the malicious storm. The pegasi were released from the entrapping winds, spiraling downwards from the relentless repetitive spinning of the storm. It was clear that controlling the storm left them terribly exhausted. Within a few minutes, the winds dissipated and the rain stopped. The dark clouds disappeared to reveal the brilliant sun once again.

Celestia sighed in relief, as another catastrophe in Canterlot was averted. She heard the various clanging of metal hooves around her, as the guards fell over on landing—exhausted and disoriented.

Firestorm looked up at her in worry. She smiled back. “Don’t worry, captain. They’ll get a day’s worth of rest.”

“Yes, your majesty,” he responded with a grin.

~~~~~~

The day came to a close, and all of Canterlot Castle was back to its former glory. Celestia found it entertaining that her sister, Luna, had slept through the entire maelstrom. There wasn’t much that could wake up her own sister when she took a day off.

Celestia levitated an ink-soaked quill and a piece of parchment before her, reciting a message she was writing.

“Dear Twilight Sparkle,

“Please give the attached message to Discord when you get the chance. I’m sure he will be delighted to read it.

“Yours truly, Princess Celestia.”

She smiled as she signed the message. She wrapped it in a coil and placed a stamp on the end of the parchment with hot wax. The stamp sealed the message, and she slid a smaller piece of white paper within. The roll of parchment disappeared in a burst of green flames.

There was another piece of white parchment that had a copy of the same message she would pass along to Discord. She kept it as a personal record for her many dealings with Discord in the past. It certainly wasn’t the last thing he’d throw at her.

‘Ha ha. Very funny, Discord.’