The Most Terrible Story Ever Written

by FlutterDashTableThrower

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Random, Derpy Hooves, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1246

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy decide to delve their hooves into the world of Fanfiction. With the help of their friends, what will these two half-baked ponies create?

When Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash decide to get stoned and write their first ever fanfiction, what kind of zaniness can we expect from two of our favorite ponies? And with the help of their friends, what could POSSIBLY go wrong? The Answer: Everything that can, will. Just to be clear, and to preserve your sanity, this fic is in no way meant to be taken seriously. At all. It's just a light hearted pwp crack fic.

Published 2014-05-09 14:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-09 14:40:02 UTC

The Beginning of Insanity

It was a normal day in the land of Equestria. The sun was shining brightly, birds were singing, Rainbow Dash was getting blazed high above the clouds while Fluttershy lay below, hitting the bong and having a lulz filled conversation with her stoned marefriend. You know, nothing but the usual. Now, this wouldn't be out of the ordinary, if not for one minute detail that I may or may not have forgotten to mention. The lulz filled conversation taking place was about a topic rarely broached in fanfiction involving our favorite ponies. It went a little something like this.

"Hey Flutters, what would you do if somepony out there, and who honestly knows where there is, had decided to write stories, let's call them fanfiction for the sake of argument, about our lives? Like, say for instance some warped pony out there decided to make us go on adventures that we'd never truly go on, something that would exist only in their deranged mind?" The prismatic maned pony on the clouds above asked her marefriend, the buzz she was feeling clouding her mind, warping the sky into a multi-colored haze as she fought to keep her giggles under control at the sheer absurdity that somepony out there would ever do such a thing. It was a losing battle.

"Honestly Rainbow, I'd want to read them. I'd want to see exactly what adventures the ponies out there would send us on. It'd be amazing to see exactly how creative the ponies out there would get in regards to us." A few giggles escaped the creamy yellow pegasus; after all, who would be so crazy as to want to write about the two ponies currently speaking? A thought came into her smoke addled mind that maybe this conversation itself could be in one of the fanfictions her marefriend had just mentioned, but it was dismissed as quickly as it came.

Neither pegasus noticed the jet black pegasus a few clouds over, quill in mouth and parchment at hoof, transcribing word for word what had just been said as part of his newest fanfic involving the two pegasi and their friends. And since no one noticed the pegasus, he will now disappear from this story until such time where it is necessary to mention him again.

The two marefriends continued to discuss the endless possibilities of what the fanfiction world had to offer, when an idea suddenly sparked in the mind of the cacphony of colour that resided in the skies of Ponyville. Now bear in mind that the aforementioned pegasus was not the sharpest tool in the provebial shed, and as such should not, under any circumstances, be allowed to hve an idea on a scale as grandiose as this, as it could very well tear the fabric of reality, shatter the fourth wall and ultimately doom Equestria as a whole. Unfortunately for reality, the fourth wall and Equestria as a whole. this is exactly what had just transpired.

"Flutters, I just had the most epic idea ever concieved. We, as in you, I, the CMC and the rest of our friends should all come together and write a fanfiction." The rainbow maned pegasus shouted down to the canary yellow mare below her, excitement oozing out of every word. Hell, it could be heard in every bucking syllable. The excitement was so great it even made her buzz that much more enjoyable.

Fluttershy giggled, her marefriend looked as excited as a filly on her birthday who had just reciieved tickets to see the traveling carnival, assuming the traveling carnival was that particular fillies favorite thing in the world. The idea intrigued the normally timid mare. She fancied herself as a pretty creative pony, what with how she went about helping Rainbow find her pet and all. A mischevious grin spread across her muzzle. This was an idea that she could get behind. She nodded enthusiastically, and the two pegasi set off into Ponyville to lacte their friends and inform them of the absolutely ludicrous idea they had in mind.

The most obvious pony to track down first would be Twilight Sparkle. After all, who better to help a pony out with writing than a pony who actually LIVED in a library? Nopony, that's who. And so, after deciding to hunt down the lavender unicorn in all her studious glory, they set out with two destinations in mind. One was a quick trip to Fluttershy's cottage to restock on their party favors. The other was to the Ponyville Library, where Twilight was undoubtedly lurking with her muzzle in a book about some subject only she cared enough to read about.

After restocking on caanibis and snacks for the road, as well as delaying their trip for another hour for some FlutterDash play time, our two heroines set out on the treacherous jouirney of epic porportions. A journey that would be so taxing on their souls, that it would take all of their combined wit, courage, loyalty and love to complete. A journey so epic that it eclipsed even taking an arrow to the knee. The journey they labelled: The quest to find Twilight Sparkle and the rest of their friends, and write their first ever fanfic. A rather creative and original name, if they dared say so themeselves. And of course, with Rainbow Dash being who she was, she did indeed dare to say so herself

Neither pegasus noticed that they had gained some traveling companions consisting of, simply for the sake of them being there mind you, Vinyl Scratch, her marefriend Octavia, Lyra and Bon-Bon, Spike, Babs Seed, Zecora and The Great and Powerful Trixie. The odd group of hastily added ponies and of course Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy made their way towards Ponyville, basking in the sunlight and randomly bumping in to each other. It didn't take long to arrive in the town square. In fact, it took even less time than stopping for FlutterDash playtime had consumed. Now it was simply a matter of reaching the library and pulling their unicorn friend from whatever book she had undoubtedly buried her muzzle into and into the debauched world of zaniness and lulz that would be Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash's collective (admittedly stoned) brainchild.

Author's Note

So, this is the beginning of this absolutely pwp crackfic that I have brought to life. This idea came to me a little while ago, in a conversation with a fellow pony who shall remain annonymous for sake of protecting his identity from any incurred wrath. We were discussing what would happen if RD and Flutters ever got stoned and decided to write a fanfic, as well as all of the terrible works we had ever read in our lives. As the conversation ended I was left thinking. What if someone intentionally set out to write a piece that was so terrible it could give Fox a run for their money? The idea intrigued me. And this absolutely ridiculous thing was born. Also, on a side note since I actually forgot to mention this while writing the first chapter: I do not own, nor will I ever own, My Little pony: Friendship is Magic, nor do I own any of the characters belonging to the aforementioned show. This is not written with the intention of profiting in any way, aside from gaining valuable insight into the thoughts and opinions of the MLP:FiM community at large.