Tales by Balefirelight (a Fallout: Equestria Group Collab)

Exalted

by Tundra Stanza

~We exalt thee. We exalt thee. We exalt thee, oh Atome!~

“Okay,” he mumbled, “That’s not weird or anything.”

He wasn’t even sure why he was here.  Sure, the town’s sheriff asked him to figure out how to deactivate the atomic bomb without blowing up every pony in a hundred-mile radius.  He wasn’t told how to deal with the strange gathering of religious nutcases.

“Oh, who am I kidding?” he asked. “That’s the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen… and I killed a giant cockroach on my way here!”

“Subhaan Atome! Subhaan Atome! Subhaan Atome!”

He shivered at the scene before him. “Let’s just get this over with.”

He lightly stepped around the ponies as the chants and ominous melodies continued.  Even the radiated water that he was stepping in felt slightly more bearable than the earful from the worshippers.

~Barukh ata, Atome Elonheiu, melekeh halo’em~

“Now, is it the green wire or the yellow wire?” he wondered. “Hey, wait a second!”

*Beep*

After pressing that one button, the countdown shut off.

“Are you kidding me?” he asked while stomping out of the contaminated pool. “There was an ‘off’ button this whole time and that sheriff didn’t even bother to check?”

He continued trotting until he made it to the town’s gates.

“Why is every pony an idiot except for me?”