Falling Off part 1
The yellow pegasus was greeted by a warm breeze as she opened her door to the wonderful scents of spring. It was midafternoon, and Fluttershy was ready to begin her annual visit to her mother. The mare exited her house with her saddlebag and locked the door behind her, careful as always. Heading up towards Ponyville, Fluttershy thought about the stories she had planned on telling her mom. There had been so much that had happened, what with the defeat of Discord and the return of Princess Luna. As she was going through the small town, Fluttershy passed by Sugarcube Corner. And of course, the especially exuberant pony that lived there came up to greet her.
“Hiya Fluttershy!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, bouncing joyfully up to the shy pegasus.
“Oh, hello Pinkie Pie,” Fluttershy meekly responded, “how are, um, things?”
“Just fantastic!” bubbled Pinkie, “Wher're you off to?”
“Oh, um, just going to visit my mother.”
The pink mare’s expression seemed to change, only for a second, but Fluttershy still saw the slight uneasiness that had crept into Pinkie’s smile when she responded.
“Oh, ah, Okie Dokie! Well I’d better be off, gotta make some treats for the party tonight. See yah around!” And with the sudden goodbye the pink party pony was off, humming as she went.
Fluttershy continued on her way through Ponyville, silently crossing paths with the other ponyfolk. Finally leaving Ponyville, the mare proceeded further down a dirt road, crowded by blossoming trees that let down their pink flower peddles, making a path that appeared to guide her to her destination. Eventually, the mare reached her destination and approached quietly. Slightly adjusting her wings, she carefully removed the saddlebag that had been hanging over her back and set it down in front of a forlorn tombstone, cracked and faded with age.
“Hi mom.”
There was a box sitting on the grave; inside was an eagle feather. Fluttershy opened the box and took out another feather from her saddlebag. She placed the feather in the box and closed the lid. The mare heard the distant bell in Ponyville. Ring, Ring, Ring. Three o’ clock.
“Well , you wouldn’t believe what’s happened this year,” she lowered her head back down to the grave, letting her mane cover her face, “A new pony came to Ponyville, her name is Twilight Sparkle, she’s a unicorn and a student of Princess Celestia herself! She is a wonderful pony and a great friend, one of the best friends I’ve made since…” She cringed at the memories of Flight School, the other ponies laughing at her...all but one. “We went on all sorts of adventures. I even fought a dragon! Not something I thought I would do.”
The pony told the stories of Nightmare Moon and Discord and how she and her friends had defeated both of them with the magic of friendship and the Elements of Harmony.
Looking up from the grave, the wind blew back her mane. The sun was lower and Fluttershy realized that more time had passed than she thought.
“Oh dear. Well I must be going, I love you, mom.”
The wind began to gust again. Fluttershy quickly grabbed a hoof full of dirt from her mom’s grave, kissed it, then released it to the wind, which grabbed the dust and scattered it across the valley.
“See you next year,” the pony murmured as she left the graveyard. The wind picked up as she went, sending the peddles with her.
~~~
Fluttershy flew quickly through Ponyville. She was running late for her appointment, and she couldn’t stop wondering about what Pinkie’s party was for.
‘That pony has a party for everything,’ Fluttershy giggled to herself.
For some reason this was a “special” party and Pinkie had made sure that everyone knew it. While she was pondering this, a voice called out to her.
“Fluttershy! Fluttershy! Are you not coming in? You’re already late.”
The pony calling out to her was her good friend Dr. Brightmane, a longtime companion of hers and her psychologist. She loved his slight Australian accent.
Fluttershy smiled at the young unicorn, “Oh yes, I’ll be right there!”
Dr. Brightmane greeted her with a soft, gentle smile. Fluttershy loved the way he smiled too; no teeth, all lips, but still just as friendly. Fluttershy entered his house and went down the hall to his office, sat on the large sofa-like chair and settled into the comforting environment. Fluttershy loved the office, the large bookshelf to the right of his desk, the window in the ceiling that let warm sunlight in, and his certificate hanging above his desk – graduate of one of the most prestigious schools in all of Equestria, the Luxambuler University. On his desk was a picture: there was glare on the photo but Fluttershy could make out the unmistakable golden mane on the tan body of Dr. Brightmane. She could not, however, recognize the blue figure standing next to him.
The doctor soon entered carrying two glasses, a pitcher of water, and his notebook and pen. He set the water on the small table in front of him, sat down and put his pen behind his left ear, (she loved that too) then began to flip through his notebook and found where they had left off from their last appointment. He took his pen down and scribbled down the date then peered over the top of his notebook at Fluttershy and wrote something else. He kept writing, but also absent mindedly poured himself a glass of water with a shimmer of his horn.
“Would you like a glass?” He asked.
“Oh, um, no, thank you.” She responded.
He took a sip and set the glass back on the table, taking up his notebook again.
“Fluttershy, we have met twice every month for the last three years, and we’ve made excellent progress. I’ll start with the usual, but I would like to press into something that we haven’t really gotten into. Is that ok with you?”
Fluttershy didn’t know what he meant by ‘haven’t really gotten into,’ but never-the-less she trusted his methods.
“Yes that’s fine.” She said quietly.
He scribbled in his notebook
“How are you feeling today?”
“Oh, um, good. The weather has been nice this week.”
Scribble.
“Have you had any outbursts?”
Fluttershy glanced toward the window for a moment, then back to Dr. Brightmane
“No, not for about five months now.”
The doctor gave her a smile, which prompted a timid grin to break across her face.
Scribble.
“That is excellent Fluttershy, just excellent.” He looked up from his work and stared into her eyes, “Now, this will be a touchy topic for you, but I feel we must talk about it.” He continued to stare.
“What do you want to talk about?” She didn’t like the way he was approaching the topic. What was so important?
He breathed out slow, “I want to talk about your relationship with your parents.”
Fluttershy was struck with confusion, “But I’ve talked to you about my parents before, it isn’t something I've held in.”
Dr. Brightmane looked to his notes, then back to Fluttershy’s eyes, “We have talked about your mother yes, but never your father.”
Fluttershy looked away from his deep gaze and softly replied, “Oh.”
“Fluttershy, it is very important we talk about this, I fear that if this topic is not touched upon, then we may never reach full success with your treatment.”
Fluttershy didn’t dare look back at his deep, enchanting eyes. “I'm sorry Dr. Brightmane, but…”
He cut her off, “Please Fluttershy, you can call me by my first name.”
She hesitated, “Ralf, I can’t talk about that, even with you.”
“But you can, everything you say here stays between us.”
“Please, I don’t want to.”
“Come now Fluttershy, it won’t be that bad.”
The moment the words left his lips, Fluttershy’s expression immediately changed. Her normally kind face erupted into one of anger.
“Fluttershy…”
“Won’t be that bad? WON’T BE THAT BAD?! BUCK YOU. YOU HAVE NO BUCKING IDEA ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED WITH ME AND MY FATHER, SO BEFORE YOU GO AND SAY IT CAN’T BE THAT BAD, YOU’D BETTER TELL ME A BUCKING SOB STORY AND LEAVE ME IN BUCKING TEARS, BECAUSE I KNOW DAMN WELL YOU HAVE NEVER FELT WHAT I’VE FELT.”
Ralf sat awestruck at her sudden explosion. Fluttershy sat there breathing heavily, trying to calm herself down. After a few minutes of silence, she was the first to speak.
“I’m sorry Dr. Brightmane.” She spoke in her normal, although shaken, voice.
“No, I'm sorry Fluttershy; I should have been more sensitive of your situation. You have no reason to be sorry.” He looked at her again, “But you must be aware of what is happening, that outburst was the sign of a more serious problem. I believe this could change you into something you’re not.”
She did not budge. He put his pen behind his ear again and took a sip of water. He closed the notebook and put it on his desk. He stood from his chair and carried the water out of the room. He came back into the room and walked over to her, putting his hoof on hers.
“I hope you can forgive me. I did not intend to upset you.”
Fluttershy looked up, eyes watering. “Yes, I forgive you.”
He moved away from her and went to the door, “I guess we will end here.”
“Oh, yes, of course.” Fluttershy got up to leave but stopped at Ralf’s side, “Ralf?”
“Yes Fluttershy?”
She looked at him for a second then kissed his cheek, “Thank you.”
And with that she left, heading back towards her house; she needed to prepare for Pinkie’s party. Ralf went back inside his house and into his office. He sat down at his desk and pulled a book down from his shelf.
Finding the Way
By
Stella Brightmane
Ralf sat for a minute, contemplating the kiss he received. Was it friendly? Did it mean something more? He looked at the picture on his desk and sighed.
“What do I do?” He asked the photo.
He sat at his desk, reading till the early hours of the morning. The pegasus weather teams brought a storm in the night, though he took no notice as he was lost in his book. His train of thought was broken by a loud crack of thunder. He rubbed his eyes and looked at the clock: three in the morning. He stood and stretched his neck and yawned. He was about to go to bed, when a knock came to the door.
‘At this ungodly hour?’
The unicorn stood and went to the door, “Who is it? It’s awfully late for an appointment.”
And from the other side he heard the soft, unmistakable voice of Fluttershy whispering “May I come in?”
~~~
“What in Celestia’s name were you doing out there?” Dr. Brightmane asked as he showed Fluttershy to the living room, “You could have gotten hypothermia!”
Fluttershy sat down on his couch and shivered. “I really needed to see you, I had another outburst.”
Ralf went to the fireplace and placed three logs inside and, with the twinkle of his horn, set the logs ablaze.
“Today?”
“Yes, at Pinkie’s party.”
“Really? What happened to set you off?”
~~~
“Hiya Fluttershy!” Pinkie exclaimed only seconds after Fluttershy knocked on her door, “Come on in!”
“Oh, thank you Pinkie Pie.”
Fluttershy went into the already crowded house; almost everypony in Ponyville was there, even the mayor!
“I, um, brought some vegetables and dip.” She dropped the plate from her mouth.
“Thanks Fluttershy! This will go great with the cupcakes and apple treats.” Pinkie took the plate and hopped over to the snack table.
Fluttershy began to look for Rainbow Dash, her closest friend since flight school. She needed to tell Dash about the kiss she had given Dr. Brightmane. After a little searching, she found her talking to Spitfire, one of the Wonderbolts! Fluttershy did not want to interrupt this moment for Rainbow Dash, she knew what the Wonderbolts meant to her. After a little while their conversation ended and she went over to Dash.
“Hey Rainbow Dash, what was that?” Fluttershy was anxious to tell her about the kiss.
“Fluttershy! You’re not going to believe this but, Spitfire is considering me to open for them, can you believe that?” The blue pegasus was beaming.
“Great job Rainbow, but I have to tell you something very important.”
Rainbow Dash heard the unusual excitement in the pony’s voice, “What’s up?”
Fluttershy looked around to make sure no one was listening, “It’s about Ralf.”
A smirk grew across Dash’s face, “What happened?”
Fluttershy pulled her into a corner and whispered, “I kissed him.”
“WHA…?!” Dash’s excitement was cut off by Fluttershy’s gentle shush.
Fluttershy glared at her, “Do you want everypony at this party to know?”
“What do you mean you kissed him?” She whispered loudly.
“I mean I kissed him.”
“Where?”
“On his cheek.’
“What lead up to that?” Dash was excited, yet puzzled.
“We had a sort of…heated appointment.”
A playful smile came across Dash’s face; Fluttershy knew exactly what she was thinking.
“NO! NOT LIKE THAT!”
The two mares erupted with laughter, practically falling on top of each other trying to keep balance. The laugh attack lasted only about thirty seconds but still left the ponies in tears. Some of the other party goers gave the two strange looks, but decided it wasn’t worth investigating and turned back to their respective conversations. They calmed themselves down just in time to hear Pinkie Pie tapping on a glass, the gentle tinkling signifying that she was going to make an announcement.
“Well hello everypony! Thank you all for coming to a Patented Pinkie Pie Party! Now, you’re probably all wondering why you’re here. Two new ponies came to town, they just finished advanced flight school and they’re here to relax for a little while. Let’s give em’ a big Ponyville welcome!”
As the two ponies stepped forward, Fluttershy recognized them immediately. Flight school, they always laughed at her, always made fun of her, pushing her down. She was filled with a sudden rage that boiled in every inch of her body. Rainbow Dash noticed the sudden change.
“Everything all right, ‘Shy?”
Fluttershy suddenly rose in the air and charged the two ponies, head-butting one of them directly in his stomach, sending him skidding across the floor.
“The hell are you doing you crazy mule?” The other pony was on his guard now.
Mule; of all the names they called her they never went as low as to call her a mule.
“Oh, I’m a mule now, am I?” Her nostrils flared. “Well then I’d better act like one!”
Fluttershy flew at the pony and caught him in the face with a sharp kick from both of her back hoofs. The kick was responded by the sickening crack of his nose breaking. The pony sprawled across the floor, bleeding profusely from his snout. Fluttershy jumped him and pinned him to the floor and continued to attack at his face, punching it over and over.
Applejack came running over to assist the downed pony, screaming “Fluttershy! What in the sam hill hell are ya doin’!?”
She grabbed Fluttershy from behind, who responded with a sharp slap to Applejack’s face. Fluttershy turned to see who had tried to interfere and saw her friend lying on the ground. Her heart sank and Fluttershy came out of her inferno. She turned back to the pony she had vigorously attacked and reeled back in horror. The face of the pony was a bloody pulp.
She got off him as ponies came to help; Applejack got up and brushed herself off.
“Fluttershy, what in Celestia’s name happened to you?! You’ve never done anything like that!”
Fluttershy felt tears swell up in her eyes. She flew out the door and into the now pouring rain. She sat down in the middle of the street and began to cry.
~~~
Ralf studied Fluttershy for some time. He stood and walked over to the fire and let out a long breath.
“Fluttershy, have I ever told you how I got my cutie mark?” He moved side-ways to show her the sword and shield on his side. “I got this cutie mark when I was born.”
Fluttershy was confused. At birth? She always saw the mark and wondered about it but he had never shared with her how he got it, and no pony ever got their cutie mark that early, let alone at birth.
“My father was a high knight – he hailed from the house of Princess Luna herself before she became Nightmare Moon, and when she did he was ridiculed and spit on.”
He turned to face her, “I was supposed to follow in his footsteps and become a knight, but I chose not to because I thought I could do so much more for this world than fight.”
Fluttershy protested, “But a cutie mark symbolizes what you are best at, you can’t change that.”
“Says who? What stops us from venturing further and finding something else we are good at doing? My mark says I'm good at fighting. I didn’t want to fight, I wanted to help people.” He came closer to her, “And I'm doing exactly that. Helping people, like you, like my other patients. A cutie mark says you’re good at something, not that you have to do it.”
Ralf sat down next to her, “We choose what we want to be, not what some stupid mark on our body says we are.”
He stood and left the room, and he came back with a book and a picture. He showed her the photo, “This is my wife, Stella. She, like me, got her cutie mark and went on to do something completely different.” He showed her the book, “She wrote this book, Finding the Way, to show others that they need not have a mark decide their future. She was amazing.” He brushed back his mane and leaned back into the couch, “My wife was also my patient. I found her in her room one day crying, I asked what was wrong and she said she didn’t want to talk about it. I got some of it out of her, but she still refused to really let me in. And if she would have just listened to me… ” He wiped his eyes. “Treatment after treatment, method after method, but nothing worked. She started having nervous break downs; there would be no signs or warnings it would just happen. Then one day she decided she had had enough.”
He put a hoof to his eyes and wiped his tears, he inhaled and exhaled deeply.
Fluttershy moved closer and put her head on his shoulder.
Ralf looked down at her, and she looked up at him. Fluttershy closed her eyes and leaned forward towards him. He hesitated. She stopped moving, opened her eyes, and leaned back to look at the ground
“Oh, I’m sorry, I just…”
She was cut off by his hoof raising her chin, and she met Ralf’s deep gaze. He leaned forward and gently pressed his lips against hers. Fluttershy felt herself blush, but the feeling left her as Ralf wrapped her in a warm embrace. She put her forelegs around his neck and ran a hoof through his mane. They kissed in sweet silence for almost a minute, then Fluttershy pulled away and their lips parted. She now understood why Ralf had insisted on talking about her father. If she did not confront her fears, she would never be rid of her memories.
She looked at Ralf. “Ok, I’m ready to talk.”
Ralf smiled at her and kissed her forehead. “Very good, but you need not talk, I have another way.”
He stood and left the room. Fluttershy expected him to come back with his notebook; instead he entered holding a record player.
“What is that for?”
“I believe that this ordeal with your father may be much deeper than I had anticipated, and I would like to try alternative methods to try and reach you.”
He plugged in the record player and put a record on.
“Please lay back Fluttershy.”
She laid on the couch and look at him, “What are you going to do?”
He put the needle on the record, “I'm going to enter your mind.”
The record began to play and the room was filled with the sounds of a forest; a river was flowing, wind was blowing, and birds were chirping. Suddenly a drum started to beat a steady rhythm and a flute played a peaceful melody.
He walked over to Fluttershy, “Now I need you to trust me, close your eyes.” Fluttershy slowly dropped her eyelids and settled into the beat of the drum. He continued. “I want you to release all tension in your body...stretch your muscles.”
She pushed her legs down and away from her body, stretching her calves. She brought her wings close to her body and felt her body sink into the couch.
“Now I want you to imagine a blue sky, a perfect day, and now a cloud floating across that sky, a gentle breeze moving it slowly.” He checked her breathing, steady. “Now this day, this is a day of your childhood, go back to your childhood. Go back.”
And with those words Fluttershy’s body went limp, she was out. Ralf stepped forward towards her and bent over close to her head. His horn began to glow blue, then deep purple.
“Dear Celestia, let this work.”
He leaned forward and touched his horn to the center of her forehead. The aura on his horn grew brighter; sparks flew and exploded brilliantly in the air. The glow slowly began to spread around his body. Then with a sudden burst of light, the shimmer left his body and shot across Fluttershy’s forehead, and Ralf fell to the ground.
