Intros-a-plenty

Tags: Futa,, Excessive cum, Cum inflation, 'semi'-hyper, Transformation = Goo pony

I drew more than a few confused stares from the guards when I left the Princess' Chambers with an odd quirk in my walk and a dopey grin on my muzzle. They could pretty accurately guess what had happened, but they were having trouble fathoming how it was possible i could walk away from 'that' with only a little wobble in my step. Of course, their failing attempts to figure it out were cut short by the Princess slipping out of the door, uniquely clothed to conceal her undesirable burden, and suddenly filling the air with far more clear headed orders than the previous day leading to the halls becoming a scramble of guards and other staff getting to work.

Thankfully, i was outide the castle before it could reach real clusterfuck levels of hallway swarming, and after collecting a stipend from the canterlot bank, thank celestia for access to the royal budget, I was on the train heading to ponyville... Of course, even though i could 'walk away' from what i had helped with, 'sitting' was another ordeal entirely. Mercifully the train ride was plenty short, a ride I spent going over information I had been provided with concerning important ponies in ponyville.

However, the instant i stepped off the train it became all too apparent that something was wrong in little ponyville... Not that it had been on my list of frequent places to 'work', but even i had heard it was a lively and friendly town. Yet here i saw very few ponies actually walking the streets or chatting, and the few that did looked rather uneasy, and though it wasn't strong enough to overwhelm, i could still smell the familiar under-scent of sex in the air, something that was more likely to happen during 'spring', not summer.

Of course, what i saw that still fit the description of ponyville was accurate, as i left the station just about every pony that 'was' in the street waved and smiled pleasantly, greetings which I returned in kind... It was rather pleasant not to have everypony turning their nose up as I went by. That said, I didn't have time to stop and chat a lot, I had to meet Twilight first and make myself useful... of course, that wasn't all that hard to do as i could see the 'tree house library' the very moment I entered passed onto one of the larger streets.

I was actually moments from approaching the door when a very colorful blur slammed into the ground in-front of me, Kicking up a cloud of dirt and looking all kinds of indignant.

Naturally this caused me to Flinch and choke down a barely audible "FUCK!", just enough that she was probably the only one who could hear it, and right away that seemed to sour her expression further.

"Yeah, not gonna happen Bucky, Buzz off!" It took me a moment that she had interpreted my 'sound of shock' by it's literal meaning... and another to realize that could potentially be accurate given the nature of this 'crisis'.

In the last moment my brain caught up and reminded me that this was 'rainbow dash' blocking my way, a close friend of Twilight that I had been informed of, the element of loyalty, and what one could describe as 'highly protective of her friends'. Judging by the scents wafting off of the door behind her, I could pretty clearly surmise 'why' she had intercepted me, but I'd dealt with more troublesome hinderances than a pegasus that can break the super sonic barrier, and i knew just the right ammount of tact to use with her.

"Yeah, 'also' not gonna happen 'bucky', I'm a proffessional on a mission from Princess Celestia and the only thing you're gonna do by getting in my way is make twilight suffer through whatever ails her 'longer'. Now move aside or I shall be forced to 'move' you aside." Yeah, that was what some might call totally tactless... that was the point

A moment later I found myself on my back, slammed into by the angry pegasus and with her ontop looking all kinds of furious "You think I'm stupid? That's the third time I've heard that just 'this' morning! you got one more chance to leave or I'm gonna just drag you all the way to the guard's." Already her wings were flapping, but this worked out just how i intended, anger is so easy to manipulate, and this was the perfect position to 'prove' that I was a proffessional.

In one sudden motion both fore-legs wrapped around her neck, one low and one high, and I shoved into forceful contact... oh, not 'just' contact, I made our lips meet, twisting my muzzle just slightly, using her wide-eyed shock as an oppurtunity to slip my tongue past her defenses, Simultaneously pushing hard enough into the kiss she'd barely be able to move her head, while forcefully sucking on her tongue at the same time... It was a display of mixed dominance and passion in one seemingly simple kiss that left her baffled for a moment, wing's sprung out strong on either side and a little tremble even slipped through her lips.

Then the next moment she found herself deposited flat on the ground with me walking towards the doors leaving a comment behind "Not bad, but next time you decide to block a 'real' proffessional, Make sure you're ready for a very 'passionate' counter-attack so you don't freeze up... Good job though, Anyone lying about being sent by the princess just they can get a chance to screw twilight needs to be knocked in the head a few times."

Before she could recover of course I closed the last bit of distance and knocked the door several times, several 'fewer' times... A moment later the door opened a crack, The scent of overloading hormones blasting me in the snout like a brick, and a lavender eye peeked out, even through the small crack i could see a highly discheveled mane, a somewhat haggard but evenly controlled voice speaking "Are you the 'proffessional'?" After I gave a little nod she let out a sound that miraculously sounded like a combined sigh of relief, and groan of annoyance... a glance to rainbow dash's seemingly paralyzed form staring at him from behind brought about another line "Rainbow, you can relax, he's the one Celestia sent, thanks for watching out for me though, and, ya know, trusting me not to ambush 'you' too."

There was a sound from Rainbow between a whimper and a groan, timed with a small nod but very little other movement besides occasional twitches... Perhaps I hit her with a bit too much sensory overload given the situation. Of coure a moment later Twilight pulled the door open further and almost growled out a "Get in here!" a Demand that I quite pleasantly obeyed and trotted quickly in the door, taking just a moment to levitate my saddle-bags over to a couch... then turned around.

Twilight 'did' growl this time, clearly intensely annoyed by what she was having to put up with "FIIIIX IIIIT!" Of course now that I could see her in full I could clearly see 'IT' in all it's, in my opinion, glory... but I'm a kinky bastard so that's understandable. Beneath her currently hung an impressively large throbbing cock, similar in color to her fur, though darker at the base and lighter near the tip, darkened a bit more in some places from how infuriatingly aroused she must have been... I could only imagine she had mental fortitude rivaling my own to control her urges when this is her first experience with having one... comparitively speaking, in 'proportion' her's was larger than Celestia's, though thanks to her much smaller overall size it would be plenty manageable without me having to grow again... of course, from the look of the tightly bloated sac behind it, she was going to make one hell of a mess.

A moment later I already had a building glow on my horn, and paused to clarify "Just to be clear, I already tried this with Celestia and it didn't work, so i don't know if I can even affect 'alicorns' in the way you need to be affected, aaand, when it failed with her, it temporarly exacerbated the 'immediate' trouble and I had to relieve her, which is only a temporary solution." That seemed to stop Twilight dead for a moment, her brain clearly processing what she had just heard... the implication that anypony could claim to have 'relieved' the princess in the way she knew I meant, was practically blasphemy for her, though it probably helped that Celestia had sent me personally... otherwise I worry she might have started blasting, instead I got-

"So, if it doesn't work, i'm going to need to be... relieved?... Physically?"

I nodded to that, still collecting the magic for the spell I intended to use... I seemed to have more time here so I could at least build it up and try harder.

surprisingly enough, before she continued, she actually blushed quite heavily, seemingly forgetting her troubles for a moment as a familiar and clearly embarassing thing came to mind "Um... I... I haven't actually... done that... before... or anything... hrm... 'intimate' for that matter... what do i-"

I cut her off for a moment there with a hoof raised "You just let me handle it then... Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of instincts that'll just drive you, and you are probably going to love the fuck out of it... But after what Celestia did this morning, I'm already aching back there and it's going to at least be tommorrow before I can walk straight again, so I don't want anypony getting busy back there right now... I'm soooo glad I could adapt to the situation, If i'd been any normal stallion, or probably even any normal mare... well, nevermind, lets do this."

Her blush blazed furiously on her cheeks from what I'd said about Celestia, I could see the mental images flashing before her eyes with every tiny flick of her ears, twitch of her eye, and pulse of her cock... She did not actually affirm continuing with the attempt to 'cure' her, so I went about my buisiness, lowered my muzzle, aimed, and released the with perfect aim, sending as much magic power as I could square into the broad head of 'It', and caused a howling moan to pour forth from her lips... my eyes could be decieving me, but I could almost swear i saw it grow some, but that shouldn't be right, afterall it's the opposite of the spell's supposed effect.

Of course, a few seconds later the light of the spell faded, and I observed expectantly for a few moments, but it didn't recede at all... if anything, it looked to have become even more agitated than before, with twilight now panting desperately while staring off into space.

Then it started

She let out a sudden little yelp as it gave a spurt, just pre, if a bit stickier than it should be, but a vast ammount for only a first leak, then another, breaking into a steady rythym of small gushes with every throb "Oh no!, nonono! It's gonna make such a MESS! okayokay... i need to-"

I cut in there and leaned in to press a hoof to her snout for attention, which she locked onto with shocking focus "You need to get your bathroom, preferable in the tub where all this mess can be contained and drained without you freaking out and spraying allover the library... NOw!"

it seemed to work, though she kept spurting and leaving a trail, from both sides now that i noticed her running away, she bolted for the stairs, and promptly jammed the head into one of the steps, earning a fresh blast against the wood and a pause for her to moan... immediately followed by some magical 'lifting' and further sprinting. I followed of course, not all that attentive of the sticky mess getting allover my hooves as i followed her trail to the bathroom.

I had only been a couple of seconds behind, but when i turned into the bathroom she was already in the tub, somewhere between drowning in lust, and shivering in fear at the overwhelming and foreign sensations, the absolute opposite of how Celestia had reacted, but for her this was most likely completely foreign.

A Sharp whistle drew her attention as I hopped into the tub from the other side "Alright Twilight, now this is important... 'relax', I'm sure this is new to you, bust honestly it's not a bad new, it's bigger than natural, but not bad, I can handle this ust fine, but you absolutely must 'not' freak out."

After she nodded a little I took the moment to slide closer, this was probably all kinds of awkward and strange to her, but as I lowered my muzzle and places that first lick along the broad head she practically melted into the sensations, spreading her fore-legs out over the back of the tub behind her and sliding deeper, a look of pure euphoria on her muzzle as she splayed out and gave off a mind numbingly hungry moan.

It took this oppurtunity to add just a bit more than pure lustful pleasure to the moment and slid in closer to plant a kiss... though she was borderline unconcious in her state of relaxed pleasure, she still pushed back into it, following new instincts that drove her to twist and shove wantingly into the kiss, pushing her tongue in, even nipping a little, similar actions being brought upon her return before I slowly pulled back from it and gave of a whispered little "That's a good girl" earning an odd effect of a small blush and her body arching to grind into me as a fresh wash of pre smothered my under-side. 'damn, she's 'royal' alright, hahah... oh, Celestia's poor maids, the mess they have to deal with... they're probably still cleaning.'

after that I drew back, letting myself get a more accurate look at her 'burden'... it was effective 'too big' by normal standards, enough to make just about any normal pony frightened for their wellbeing... but I'm Bedroom fucking BLITZ! AND I LIKE EM BIG!

Now I let myself go, both for-legs wrapping around a lower portion of her length and tugging it closer to me, creating a new pressure in her loins that earned a fresh howling moan as it tugged at places she didn't could be tugged. A moment later my mouth found that broad head, giving a kiss equally as passionate as the previous one, even using tongue, it was certainly big enough, and driving her wild enough that the next spurt of pre was enough to fill my muzzle and gush out the edges.

I was in my element here, sure, it's nice to get kinky, bondage, transformation magic, 'magic' in general, toys, potions... I've been around a dozen different entire 'districts' worth of fun, but there's just something unquestionably 'hot' about somepony this productive and so full of need that there can sometimes be barely enough time to breath between drowin gushes of Sexual fluids... sure, it's a bitch to clean up when you're done, but oh my Celestia is it HOT!... If I weren't so focused on making sure she got off before overflowing the tub, the bathroom, and probably the bedroom i passed through on the way in, I might have been more focused just how worked up 'I' was getting too!

As i started to turn that kiss into suckling, grind my body against that excessive length, and move my hooves up and down, she seemed to melt further into letting me do all the work, not even grinding anymore, though her panting moans were mixed with occasional squirming as the feelings grew more intense deep down. That changed quite suddenly!

It had been a very unexpected reaction, given her inexperience perhaps i underestimated her, but i suddenly found hooves and magic shoving me harder against her raging cock, sandwhiching it tightly between 2 bodies that were now almost perfectly covered in slimy pre, and doing her damndest to shove it as deep into my muzzle as possible. It got pretty far actually, I 'am' a highly experienced pony afterall, I reacted quickly by relaxing and joining the pushing, resulting in nearly a foot of length pushing in before reaching the back of my curled throat and finding no room to move further.

More importantly was the sudden lack of breathing space, but i had long since come up with a solution for 'that!', it's an incredibly awkward feeling thing but hardly notice in a moment like this, and i quickly cast a certain enchantment that bypasses the throat and simply teleports air in and out of where it needs to be. The awkardness was more than made up for by the ability to stay 'down' indefinately, and I was quite clad i could use such a useful spell as she suddenly jerked into trying to fit even more.

I could feel Twilight's magic getting rougher trying to find a way to get more of it in, which wasn't working at the moment, and once more expertise came in handy as I solved the problem. I pulled back, using the leverage of her arousal on her body to pull her forward while I slowly went down further, starting to bob and twist as I guided myself to the bottom of the tub, twisting my muzzle carefully suddenly to ensure my horn didn't stab anything as she came down ontop of my back, and all at once i felt myself pulled in deeper until my muzzle met her base.

It was admitedly rare that I was in a mind blowing ammount of bliss myself, since I'd been through just about every kinky thing you can imagine, but something about being stuck under the princess of magic with a more than impressive cock gushing right into my stomach, filling me up, and already buried under gallons of juices that had been flooding the tub, it just hits me in that sensitive spot that sets off all the nerves.

However, her body seemed to choose 'this' time to display her inexperience as i felt a familiar tightening run through her length and... wait, why did I feel magic emanating from inside me? 'Oh fuck me! Inexperienced Alicorn + Legendary magic level + overwhelming sexual sensations = what in Tartarus did I get myself into!?' I had to admit a little fear came up, i mean, i had no idea what she might do, for all i knew i could end up bursting into flames... thankfully that didn't happen, I got lucky with her instincts driving something kinky to happen.

It's quite likely that half of the neighborhood could hear her orgasmic scream, hell, i could hear it and i was submerged with pre-cum in my ears! Thought only I'd get to know just how much there 'was' to orgasm as it surged, quickly over-filling my stomach and backing up through every exit it could reach, while similarly over-whelming the natural 'Can't stretch that far' resistances... lets just say, it's a good thing I keep helpful enchantments on my body for cases like this, not that it mattered in the end.

She barely registered that she was 'rising' in the tub as I swelled up beneath her, seemingly only grind even harder... She didn't seem to notice at all as her grinding motions got enough freedom to start thrusting again, and by the time her explosives gushes of cum starting shooting up to paint the wall behind the tub she was so wracked in bliss the house could fall down and she'd never notice.

It turns out that the tub had been a good idea, it was now filled to the brim and over-flowing with that white substance and strands of red mixed in, a Large ammount had still managed to pour over the edge, bathing the tiled floor, though only a small bit had actually gotten out under the door.

Of course, I was very busy trying to 'pull myself together', So i didn't notice as her relaxed state turned into grand shock at how much of a mess she'd made, then realization that she'd been pumping that mess into somepony... then she saw the strings of red in the tub and let out a horrified teary scream that I obviously couldn't hear at the moment, though i oddly 'felt it' just fine.

Then quite suddenly a large portion of the Goopy substance in the middle of the tub turned much redder, and a familiar, if slimy, head rose up out of it, even forming similar hair color in the right shape "Oi, Bloody hell girl, you 'goo'ed me'! It's a good thing i've done this before!" Naturally 'she' hadn't see this before, and was practically trying to climb up the wall behind her, still half hard even... of course, 'that' scream i heard and so did probably half the neighbors again, and somewhere in the back of my mind a thought came up about a protective dragon that might not be so little anymore, but more importantly was clearing this situation up before anypony reacted to the screaming.

Suddenly a gooey hoof shot up out of an odd place in the cum, turning red and planting on her muzzle to silence her, hilariously enough earning a soft moan as she tasted a slight cherry scent mixed with her own cum leak into her mouth "Hush you, This is hardly the wierdest thing that can happen to me. Honestly, I should have anticipated that your inexperience with that particular bit of anatomy would lead to you unleashing unexpected magical effects through it... lucky you, I've been a goo pony before, it's actually a lot of fun, and whill make cleaning up after you much easier... now, no more screaming."

As I pulled my hoof away she slowly settled back into the other side of the tub... oh god it'd been a while since i felt 'that', a pony relaxing 'into me', my 'body' was slowing spreading through the cummy mess and making it part of 'me' and oh sweet celestia it felt GOOD! it took me a moment to realize Twilight had started talking, with an expression mixed between bliss and worry "Did it hurt? I mean, I got really forceful there, i totally lost it I think, and i saw how much i put out, no-pony can hold that much! I-"

I silenced her with a sudden unexpected 'rub' somewhere sensitive that created a soft meep "No, it didn't hurt, i just kinda 'melted' harmlessly, honestly it feels awesome, like an orgasm in every inch of your body... Your cum is FULL of magic too, so it's pretty easy absorbing it all right now." this got her attention just a bit and she looked down to find my 'red' spreading over more and more of the flooded mess, even outside the tub. "Yeah, you're kindof sitting in 'me' goo right now, don't worry though, it's hardly invasive, it actually feels really awesome." This of course sent a furious blush across her features as she fathomed 'bathing in somepony'.

By now, as more of my body 'collected' into a pony form, I was actually looking larger than before and very gooey besides. "Oh sweet Celestia... I'm not sure if I should be grossed out, intrigued, or horny again! AUGH! Everything is so mixed up because of whatever this 'thing' is that's happening to everypony!... ACK!, THAT'S RIGHT! I'm clear now! I need to get to work!" All at once she started trying to throw herself out of the tub, and promply fell on her face.

Or almost did, a distinct excess of goo rose up from the ground to meet her before she actually impacted, carefully repositioning her to standing and holding her there for a moment "Now wait just a moment, you let me finish 'reforming' so i can clean all that muck off you're body before you go running off flinging bits of cum allover your library." Holy shit she is so adorable when blushing that hard!

It still took a moment, there was a 'lot' of me to take stock of with all that fluid to turn into 'goo material', but before long the tub was mostly empty and I was sliding out... ohhhh geeez, i love that oozy feeling sometimes, I actually tended to stay physical more because it's 'too much' fun to be gooey all the time, it makes me really playful! "Okay, now hold still, this is gonna feel really awkward for you, but it'll get everything clean."

At that point I moved towards her and didn't stop, she looked quite worried by this, but it soon turned into stiffled groans of delight as my goo poured over her form, sucking every last bit of cum from every nook and cranny, earning several barely controlled moans as I washed over more sensitive areas and came back off the other side, now leaving a decidedly pristine Twilight Sparkle standing there, smelling faintly of cherry's and sex. "there we go, all clean, now off you go princess, you bury yourself in some books and i'll go see if there's anypony else in desperate need of my services, you oughta be okay for a couple of days at least, considering that monster of a load, hahah."

The blush remained, but she looked around the bathroom with an impressed expression, clearly surprised at how perfectly 'goo-less' it was aside from me "wow, you're really good at that... Hmmm, perhaps I should look into the viability of a goo pony cleaning service sometime... oh, if only most of the natural ones weren't 'dangerous'." she was already leaving the bathroom, her head clearly in the clouds of knowledge seeking already... I'm sure she was uncomfortable about having to be serviced by a stranger, not to mention all the mess and turning him into a goo pony, but I had to imagine that her academia was her greatest safety mechanism to keep from freaking out about that.

...

well, that was done, So i started out and down the stairs, collecting the last bits of mess left behind prior to reaching the bathroom, taking a glance to see Twilight already nose deep in half a dozen books 'holy crap, that filly is dedicated!'... I hadn't intended to disturb her, then half way down the stairs the front door slammed open.

"TwILIGHT!? Somepony said they heard you screaming? Is everything... holy crap, what is that?!" I hadn't met Twilight or most of her friends personally prior to today, Rarity would be the only one since she tended to get around sometimes thanks to her fashion business, and no we did not 'get personal'. However, it took no sort of genius to realize that the obvious Dragon in the door-way was most assuredly 'Spike', though it seemed that recent years had been kind to him, he was easily larger than an average pony now, not quite 'mac' big, but given that he was a dragon he still cut an imposing figure, not to mention that protective glint in his eyes could send a burglar into fitful pleas for their safety.

Then a familiar face happened to peek in behind him, though only just "what is what Darling? uh... KYAAAH!" Rarity, looking as pristine as ever, got one look at the extra large gooey pony shaped thing on the stairs, shouted, and hid behind spike, only adding to that dangerously protective expression.

'Oh great, assumption in 3, 2, 1.'

"what are you doing in twilight's Library?! and what are you!? wHERE'S TwILIGHT!?" The glint in his eyes turned into an aggressive posture then and a bit of smoke huffing from his snout.

"SPIKE!, don't threaten him! I'm just fine and he was sent by the princess!"

Instantly the aggression vanished, he perked up, and snapped his head over to the sight of a couple of floating books and a purple hoof waving from behind the Library's center table. "wait, the princess sent a slime monster?"

I felt the need to interject there "Oi! I'm not a slime monster, I am a 'goo pony', there's a HUGE difference... and I didn't arrive like this."

Twilight added on, peeking up from behind the table with a slightly uneasy blush "That's kinda 'my' fault... hrm, he helped me with that 'problem' I've been having all week, remember? the one that needed you to stay at Rarity's until it was fixed, 'just incase'?"

"wait... so, you're okay now? It's all better?"

"well, not quite, it's 'under control' for now, but it's not 'gone'... I can focus now and get to solving this problem, and that's the important part!"

I had moved on down the stairs by then, standing more comfortably closer to spike, though i could still hear the occasional whimper from rarity peeking around and staring at me... while Twilight and spike had a bit of back and forth I decided to address what i 'knew' was the issue "Rarity, you can stop cringing in fear now... I'm not 'dirty'... Infact, goo pony 'goo' is a remarkably clean substance, the bathroom upstairs is completely spotless thanks to this goo... Might feel a little odd but I assure you that contact with me is perfectly hygenic."

Something snapped spike's glare back to me then and I returned it with a defiant certainty in my own "Hey! how do you know Rarity?"

She added on from next to him, still concealed though seemingly less freaked out after being told I wasn't 'dirty' "I had the exact same thought."

"Simple, we've met before." I could 'smell' the suspicion from spike, as if he thought i was after her of something "In manehatten? a few times actually, completely proffesional of course." There wasn't quite a recognition appearing, so I tried something to make things more clear. I focused on the gooiness and tried to tighten it up into a more proper example of my physical form, not perfect yet, but it takes about an hour after going 'gooey' the first time to stand a chance of condensing into a 'solid' form, then it clicked.

Even though I was much larger than i normally should be, the similarities became obvious once I'd started refining my features from just being goopy. "Blitzy! I 'do' remember you... I also remember how dreadfully rude I was the first time the we met, letting the gossip tell me what to think first, oh, 'the shame!'." the sudden confirmation seemed to earn more actual relaxing from spike though, which was a good thing... I had a good feeling about being able to handle a bad situation, afterall this 'twilight powered goo' was saturated with enough magic I could probably imitate an alicorn, if only for a short time before running out, i didn't really like the idea of throwing fire and goo everywhere in a fight.

"Hmhm, Rarity, you weren't even 'close' to the most insulting reaction I've gotten from a pony. Once you calmed down you were actually quite a pleasant conversationalist, and i do so enjoy a bit of dirty gossip about those grimy nobles that are ever so ready to scoff at anything they think is beneath them.

"Dirty?... You didn't-"

"No spike, I have would describe my encounters with Ms.Rarity as Perfectly Proffesional Pontification! At most, a friendly hug was shared."

"Oh, sorry..."

"Nah, it's okay, I've heard enough about ya man, I know you're protective of her, hmhm, I'd say she and twilight are damn lucky honestly, having a dragon around to be protective of them, hmhm." There is something strangely adorable and still even a little manly about a dragon of his current proportions blushing at a compliment, even if his only other reaction is a small cough to act tough about it. "and hey, if you ever need a deep scale cleaning, feel free to look me up, You're not the first dragon i've encountered, and this goo can clean things where almot nopony can possibly get to." There was a mild deepening of the blush and an suddenly defensive addition to his look, so i quickly added "Completely proffessional, i swear... honestly, I get tired of adding that, just because my official occupation is 'Pony Pleaser' doesn't mean I'm not capable of keeping other services 'mature and respectful'... Granted, a 'goo cleaning' will feel rather odd, but I promise, It'll work wonders, there's a couple dragon's out there that are a liiittle less grumpy after getting a proper cleaning."

It was odd to notice, but Rarity seemed to be getting more and more comfortable with the 'slimy thing in the room' with every bit of 'cleaning' talk I carried on, she even acquired a slightly devious expression, as if she were intending to use me to get back at something by 'cleaning' it... that hardly made much sense, but I'm certainly not gonna complain. "Oooh, Spikey, maybe you should take him up on that offer sometime, He could probably get that annoying itch you've been mentioning on your back that I can't seem to locate... Oh! Blitzy! are you sticking around long? If you're half as good for 'cleaning' as you imply, you'd work wonders on my little sister after she's gotten done with her wild escapades... honestly, they've all gotten their cutie marks, and yet they still go out together doing crazy things that somehow result in being glued together with tree sap!"

"You mean the crusaders? Heh, I think I heard about them actually, they seemed to have spread some over the years... ironically, it would not be my first 'sap removal cleaning', though I've never had the pleasure of meeting the 'founders' yet." Ugh! Another look? "Okay seriously, not everytime i mention words related to my proffession has to imply something dirty! I find their antics to be rather entertaining, and it would indeed be a pleasure to observe some of their activities at some point... Of course, I 'am' in town on a business in a way... I was just about to head out to look for other ponies that might need help... now that Twilight is able to think straight It's best if I see to other ponies suffering with this odd plague..."

Being that the conversation was turning casual enough and the initial urges of having heard about Twilight screaming had calmed down, Spike actually moved off from the conversation, still blushing mildly at the cleaning offer, from recieving a decidedly mild scolding about jumping to conclusions over and over, and debating how to feel about Rarity's endorsement of it, and of course heading over to Twilight's side to catch up.
Rarity mean while moved up a little closer to continue our conversation. "Hold on, I thought you were sent here to help twilight so that she could work on a way to 'fix' all of this."

"That is my 'primary' mission as the now Royally endorsed expert on the invasive transformative magics that seem to permeate this magical plague, and for the time being that has been taken care of... It should be a couple days before I have to focus on that again, maybe, I'll still be back here everyday, as an alicorn and all it's quite possible there's other effects I may need to help with. However... Just because that's my primary mission doesn't mean I shouldn't try to lessen the strain on other ponies... I really hate to delve into the darker side of this crisis, but..."

I glanced over a moment before leaning in to speak a little quieter "Listen, Twilight was on the verge on 'rape mode' when I got here, she was 'obviously' struggling desperately with urges she was nowhere near ready to control on her own, and her 'change' is minor compared to some possibilities... There were a couple of guards in the castle I swore smelled like Griffins despite their concealing enchantments... This is to say nothing of other ponies who don't have Twilight's advantage of hardcore mental acuity to drown the urges in logical pursuits... So far there has been reports of 'forceful interactions' that i know of, or worse, but I know how these instincts and urges work, They can drive a pony insane if left alone too long, and that's the 'least' of it honestly... I can only imagine someponies out there are locked away in their bedrooms or something to avoid losing control near friends or family and could very well be starving!... If I can head-off the level of maddening lust that can lead ponies to ruin themselves, I'd gladly take the insulting criticism that comes along with it...

I hate to say it but I must be realistic here... a Magical Plague is indescriminate, as much as I would love to assume it can't happen, it's very possible it could affect your sister or one of her friends, I'll do my best to simply cure it magically, but sometimes the affliction 'requires' something else... for instance, i couldn't 'cure' twilight, she's an Alicorn and beyond my magicly transformative reach... Hell, if it gets 'you', you at least have spike to help out... unless I'm assuming too much there, I mean there's always the obvious 'pony x dragon' issue, but the viability of a relationship is as obvious and night and day with him." One could practically read 'mildly hopeful despair' allover her face after I went into detail on the current crisis, then a furious blush over the last bit.

"I... well, I suppose I can try to 'accept it' if she is suffering this blasted plague and it 'will' help her... oh, but I can't hardly imagine how much 'more' stressful it could be to have this plague result in a foal she's far too young and not ready for... and, well, yes, I am 'with' spike, It took time but we decided to give it a try and simply hope for the best."

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that, I have more than enough contraceptive spells at the ready to make sure that can't happen... I've been 'curing seasonal heat' for years already with no accidents... I dare say I am one of maybe a handful of Stallions completely immune to the effects of Hormones in the air, possibly also why this Plague hasn't affected 'me' yet... and better still, as a 'goo pony' right now, I can simply 'choose' not to be fertile, one of the things I've always liked about this form, heheh."

"Oh! That changes everything.... oh, Here I was worrying there'd be dozens of new foals running around town after this Crisis is dealt with... Oh how silly of me, Here I've been assuming 'too much' about your proffession, and then suddenly I don't assume 'enough'."

"Hahah, It's quite alright, as I said before, I've had faaarrr worse reactions... Now, If you will excuse me, I have a mission to continue!... I can still tell from the scent on the air that there's many ponies out there suffering." and with that, I suddenly dashed out the door and closed it behind me... well, it might have been all kinds of sudden, but I felt the conversation was dying down... aaaand I got this feeling in the back of my head like Spike was burning away my goo glaring at me for being so close and carrying on a suspiciously private conversation with Rarity.