It's All In Your Head

by Ponyman

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Comedy, Romance, Adventure
Length: 15974

Twilight Sparkle used to be well respected and praised. But she damaged her reputation in a fitful night of mad ramblings and horrible prophecies.
Now confined to the walls of Ponyville's hospital, the unicorn has to contend with her new 'imaginary friend', and piece together seemingly random events to figure out how to stop the encroaching darkness that threatens to consume all of Equestria.

This is my first attempt at something new. I'm posting it here to see if it's worth the trouble to continue or not. This may evolve over time.

Moral Support Provided By: Biglulu
Cameo Appearance By: Hollyfern
Awesome cover image By: Jabberspike

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-22 17:50:25 UTC

Institutionalized

"Sometimes I try to do things, and it just doesn't work out the way I wanted to..."

-Institutionalized (Suicidal Tendencies)

        I couldn’t sleep.  Not that I ever would anyway.  After everything I had witnessed, everything I touched and recorded and felt through every fiber of my being; they still called me a liar.  Sure, it was a well known fact that Twilight Sparkle was prone to fits of temporary insanity before.  But this time was serious.  More serious than ever before.  This wasn’t about some missed report, or worrying about what the future held.  I had a good idea what the answer to the latter was.

        Now, here I was, placed in the cramped and tiny mental ward of the Loveheart Memorial Hospital.  The pony in the room next to mine wouldn’t stop barking like a dog, and the constant badgering by the auburn stallion with the blue mane wasn’t helping my frayed nerves.  Did he even work at the hospital?  I didn’t know.  All I knew, was I could relate to Rainbow Dash’s hate of being cooped up.  It was different being shut inside when I tossed myself into something I really enjoyed.  But this was against my will, and everything was on the line.

        Even my best friends, who had learned several times over to take my problems seriously and be there for me; couldn’t bring themselves to believe something so outlandish.  For a brief moment, even I doubted myself.  Was I just imagining all of this?  Sure, I knew of the horrors locked within the depths of Tartarus; but the darkness I had encountered and warded off temporarily was nothing like them.  In fact, it didn’t seem to fit within our universe at all.  Not even Princess Celestia had an answer for the bubbling blackness I had seen slithering off the walls and clouding up the skies.

        The only thing I had to go on, was a name.  The single name whispered in a thousand voices as the darkness seeped into my very being.  My magic tainted and my body feeling as if it were being dissolved.  Through the pain and sickness, I heard the name that the darkness wanted me to praise.

        Aerebus...

        “Dinner time!” A voice sang as that brown earth stallion entered the room once more.  I frowned as I looked at the pony smiling at me.  His blue mane done up in a mullet that I thought looked ridiculous.  Another attempt to feed me the happy pills that he claimed made the monsters go away.  Part of me wanted to punch him for mocking me in my time of need.

        “Do you even work here?”  I finally asked, breaking the heavy silence in the air.

        “I volunteer,” the stallion cocked a brow.  “Son of one of the nurses.  Why do you care?”

        “Well then I hardly think you’re in authority to give me ---”  I was cut off when I noticed the brown earth pony frown.

        “I have more authority than you think, Miss Sparkle,”  the stallion shook his head slowly.  “I just want to help you get better.”

        “Then get me out of here!”  I snapped, thumping my forehooves on the bed.  “You believe me, don’t you?”

        “I don’t know what to believe, honestly,” he spoke as he placed the tray on my lap.  “You seem nice enough, and I’ve seen you around before.  You don’t appear to be crazy.”

        “Then let me go!”

        “That...” the stallion paused, “I don’t have authority for.”

        “Ooooof course you don’t,” I rolled my eyes.  There was that inherent sarcasm again.  The nurses hated me for that.  “Look, um...”

        “Holly,” the stallion finished, giving a brief nod.

        “Holly?  Look, Holly.  I don’t know if I believe it all myself either.  But so far, you’re the only one who has listened to me.  Even if you think I’m insane like all the others, can you at least help me?”  My eyes began to grow misty as thoughts of failure invaded my mind.  All my friends, Ponyville, Equestria itself...would fall to this darkness.  All because I couldn’t stop it.

        “I can’t afford to do anything like that,” Holly shook his head.  “You understand, don’t you?”

        “Yeah,” I replied flatly, staring at the wall across from me.  “I understand.”

        Holly gave a weak smile and then left the me to my bleak thoughts.  I stared at the food on the plate, but I wasn’t the least bit hungry.  If anything, I felt cold.

“I can help you, you know.  All you have to do is ask.”

“I’d rather Equestria be swallowed up in living darkness than EVER ask you for help,” I hissed through my teeth, not caring if Holly overheard me talking to myself.  I looked over to the chair for guests to see a familiar sight sitting in it.  One of a mismatched creature, wearing an arrogant grin.  It was all too common for me nowadays, but that was the least of my problems.  If anything, I came to accept the new resident inside my mind, as he strangely made for good conversation.

        “Do you really mean that?”  Discord asked, leaning forward in the chair as if awaiting me to prove him right.  “I felt it too, you know?  But unlike you, I know what Aerebus is...to some extent.”

        “And let me guess,” I sighed, returning my stare to the adjacent wall.  “You’ll only tell me if I free you?”

        “Smart girl,” Discord grinned.  “Either way, Equestria is doomed, so...”  he teleported to my bedside to look me right in the eyes.  “Better the devil you know...”

        “I’d rather Equestria not be destroyed at all, thanks,” I muttered.  I could feel my features growing dark as I eyed the creature wandering about the room.  Discord paused to stare at a painting, seemingly lost in thought.

        “This is so...ugly,” he turned to me and threw his hands in the air.  “It’s too orderly! Too much symmetry!”

        “It’s a landscape, there is no symmetry...”  I rolled my eyes.  He could be so dense sometimes it seemed.

        “No, no, no!”  Discord shook his head.  “I mean the Golden Ratio!  The universe isn’t meant to be orderly at all!  It was born from chaos!”

        “From chaos comes order,” I smirked.

        “Perhaps.  But there is one thing constant in this, or any other universe,” Discord returned to my bedside to look me in the eyes once more.  “Regardless of our mutual hatred for one another, we’ve gotten along pretty well in this symbiotic relationship as it were.”  He leaned in closer, and I could swear I felt his hot breath on my snout.  “But rest assured, Aerebus won’t be as nice.”

        “Ooooh, I’m so scared,” I broke eye contact to give an insulting eye roll.

        “You should be!  You felt his evil when he touched you.  Now look at yourself!”  Discord pointed to the mirror over the sink in the small bathroom.  I glanced at it, then back to Discord, tilting my head in confusion.  Was something wrong with me?

 “Go look!”  He beckoned, gesturing to the mirror even harder than before.  I gave a shrug and pulled myself from bed.  I cried out as I fell to the floor, pain shooting up my side.  It felt like thousands of needles stabbing me in the flank.

My body felt like it was made of stone as I carried myself across the short distance to the bathroom.  Placing my shaky hooves on the basin for support, I pulled my weight upwards so I could look into the mirror.  My eyes crushed shut and teeth clenched on instinct as I fought the pain in my inactive muscles and the sudden bone chilling cold I felt throughout.

        Finally cresting the sink, I slowly opened my eyes.  They painfully adjusted to the harsh lighting reflecting off the sterile white walls and tile floor as part of me expected to see some horrible scar, or an eyepatch.  Or at the very least a messed up mane.  But I saw none of that.

In fact, I didn’t see anything but the wall behind me...

        “Really quite fetching, if I do say so myself,” Discord mused with a smug grin.

        My mouth hung open as this revelation began to sink in.  All at once, a surge of sadness, anger, and hopelessness coursed through me; crashing at the shore of my heart.  The sudden wave of emotion made my headache much worse than it was before, and my stomach began to twist and retch at the thoughts of what I had become.  With nothing left to do and nopony left to turn to, I closed my eyes...

        And screamed...

***

        I could play therapist to my friends all day if I had too.  Even if I never really knew what I was talking about or giving myself a headache over the enigma of Pinkie Pie.  But there was something oddly disconcerting and unnerving about being on the other side of the couch, so to speak.  The soft cushions felt hard as a rock as my body tried to reject the reality that, yes, ponies thought I was insane.  I couldn’t relax if I wanted to, there was no time.

Everything was going to be destroyed, and here I was stuck telling the same story to the same pony who didn’t believe me.  Sure I could deny that I was insane, but the constant reassuring wave from Discord standing across the room always made me doubt even that was true anymore.

        “We’ve really got to stop meeting like this...” Holly gave a smile.  He was trying his best, but his effort wasn’t getting me anywhere.  “You’re a nice pony.  You want to get out of here so bad, why do you keep going crazy?”

        “It’s not like I choose to go crazy,” I sighed, finally starting to relax on the couch.  “But lately it seems the whole world is stacked against me, you know?”

        “Go on...”

        “You’ve heard all of this before, why bother?”  I shook my head, covering my eyes with my hooves.  Holly was silent as I shuddered a few times.  I was resisting the sudden urge to hit something.  Holly couldn’t see the little dance Discord was doing on the inside of my eyelids.  “Just call me insane and send me back to my room.”

        “Well, ‘insane’ is such a speculative word.  I mean, I like to wander into the Everfree Forest for fun, just to study animals,” Holly replied, his chest puffing out slightly in confidence.  “I’m studying to be a vet, after all.”

        “A vet?!”  I bolted upright on the couch.  Was he serious?  “If you’re studying to be a vet, why are you here?!”

Holly shrugged, glancing to nothing in particular.  “Ponies are mammals too, right?”

        “Ugh...I don’t believe this!”  I slumped back onto the couch, eyes watering like I was ready to flood the room with tears.  “See, I told you.  The whole world is against me!”

        “Now don’t go blaming all your problems on me!”  Holly replied, his voice a mix of irritation and pity.  “Why don’t you start from the beginning?”

        “You just won’t believe me,” I whispered, shaking my head slowly.

        “Whatever this is, real or not, it’s obviously got you worried.  Something like that doesn’t just happen,” Holly nodded firmly.  “Now, tell me.”

        I looked across the room, feeling like I was seeking some form of permission to continue.  Not that I needed permission, especially not from him.Discord was there, of course, nodding his head and gesturing for me to talk.  I could feel Holly’s eyes staring at me as I did this odd ritual.  Resigning to my fate, I laid back upon the couch and began to talk.

***

        “Where do you suppose it came from?”  the small dragon asked, staring at the cover of the old book with wide eyes.

        “I don’t know, Spike,” Twilight replied, equally enraptured by the intricate designs and gold leaf upon the musty tome.  It wasn’t often that books shown up unannounced, and Twilight certainly didn’t order any such literature.  Though she had begun an initiative to try and keep Ponyville stocked with works from other areas such as the Gryphon Kingdoms and even some of the folklore passed down to Zecora and Chief Thunderhoof, Twilight found it extremely difficult to find any works by the dragons that had been translated into Equestrian.  The unicorn always had the doubt that nopony would appreciate this injection of culture anyway, but at least it gave her something to read when she couldn’t sleep.

        Now here she was, staring at a tome that was clearly written in dragon.  Twilight inwardly slapped herself when she asked if Spike knew what it said.  Of course he wouldn’t, he was raised to understand their language.  Whatever this book said was obviously important.  Or at the very least, taken seriously.  Without a second thought, the unicorn’s horn gave a bright glow as her magic began ripping several large research books off one of the higher shelves.  “There has to be something here I can use to translate, or at least understand what it’s about.”

        “Maybe Zecora could translate it?  She seems to know stuff like this,” Spike shrugged, returning his green eyes to the book before him.  He didn’t know much about his own kind outside of what he experienced for himself.  If that was what it took to be a dragon, he’d rather be a pony.  Besides, he couldn’t live with himself if he lost Rarity over something as trivial as fitting in.

        “Maybe, but I kind of want to do this.  I hate bothering somepony else if I can do it myself,” Twilight shook her head, pouring over a particularly thick book in front of her.  She enjoyed the fact that other than Zecora, she was the most knowledgeable pony when it came to dragons.  Through trial and error, personal experience, and the usual bugging Princess Celestia and Zecora; Twilight was confident she could solve this mystery herself.  Her eyes fell on a small section of translated words to work from.  “Aha!”  Turning her eyes back to the mystery book, she examined the first sentence on the random page she opened to.

   “‘Faal dilon yah nahkriin’,”  her diction would make dragons cringe.  “hmm...”  Twilight glanced between the two open books until she pieced together the words.  “‘The dead seek vengeance’.  Well,” she pulled back from the books and stared ahead, “that doesn’t sound real nice.”

        “Zombies?!”  Spike leapt into the air like somepony just stabbed him in the rear.  “We better bolt the door!  Board up the windows!  I got to find Rarity!!”

        “Spike!  Calm down!”  Twilight snapped.  “It’s just a book!  A really...strange book.”  Her gaze returned to the open tome in front of her.  Her curiosity was piqued now, as she wondered what else the book said.  The mare shook her head at the prospect of staying up all night to try and decipher the whole thing.  She bit her lip and looked out the window to see the sun was beginning to set.  “I’m never going to sleep until I know what this says fully.  I’m going to Zecora’s.”

        “What?!  Don’t leave me here alone with the zombies!”  Spike stopped his frantic hammering, almost swallowing the nails he held in his mouth.  Twilight saw that several windows were already covered with wooden planks.  Where did he get those from anyway?

        “There are no zombies!”  Twilight rolled her eyes.  “If you’re that worried, you can stay with...”

        Spike was already out the door and down the road.  “...Rarity...”  Twilight sighed as she levitated the book gently into her saddlebag.  Wandering into the Everfree Forest at night with an ominous tome wasn’t the best of ideas, but Twilight was surprised to find she was eager for such adventure.  She had changed a lot thanks to her friends and experiences defeating evil.  The old Twilight would be terrified, or at the very least, logically reluctant to partake of such an endeavour.

Spike will be fine.  Rarity will take good care of him while I’m gone.The unicorn paused to reassure herself one more time.  Despite her newfound taste for boldly strolling into the unknown, her old habit of analyzing everything to the last detail refused to die.  She knew the path to Zecora’s by heart now; and, barring any random encounters with astray wildlife, knew she would be fine too.  Hefting the saddlebag onto her back and shifting the weight to be comfortable, the mare closed her eyes and channeled her magic.  Her horn began to glow, becoming a makeshift flashlight.  She smiled at the fact such a simple spell could be so useful, and began her journey.

        What Twilight didn’t see, however, was a cloaked pony watching her from the shadows.

***

Strolling down Stirrup Street, the main thoroughfare of Ponyville, Twilight couldn’t help but notice that it was getting darker than usual.  The smell of precipitation on the increasing wind indicated that a storm was on the horizon.  Rainbow Dash had assured Twilight that there wasn’t any ‘wild weather’ for miles, which this memory made the unicorn more alert than she was before.  A little bit of rain would feel nice after the humidity of the day, but Twilight didn’t really want to be out in a thunderstorm.  She briefly thought if she should find Dash and ask about it, but assumed that the pegasus was already on the job.  Far be it from her to tell the others how to do their jobs.

Carousel Boutique was visible in the distance, the windows shining like beacons in the darkness.  Twilight sighed as she weighed her options.  She had already come too far to turn back now.  Maybe Rarity could loan her an umbrella?  The unicorn trotted up to the door, pausing to glance at the sky.  The stars were slowly being blocked by the approaching clouds, making Twilight feel a bit uneasy.  She raised a hoof, hesitated, then knocked on the gilded door.  Giggling and the sound of shuffling feet could be heard approaching before Spike answered, wearing an adorable white robe that Rarity must have made for him.

        “Oh!  Hey, Twilight!  Worried about me, huh?”  Spike smiled.

        “Actually, I was going to ask Rarity for an umbrella,” Twilight replied, glancing back at the sky.  Spike followed her stare to the inky clouds above.

        “I thought you said it wasn’t supposed to storm?”  the dragon noted.  Rarity had come up behind him, placing a hoof on his head.  Twilight eyed the floral print pattern silk pyjamas and giggled softly.  Those two, I swear.

        “Who is it, dear?  Oh!  Twilight!  What brings you here?  Spikey Wikey said you were going to Zecora’s.”  Rarity turned her own gaze to the sky.  “But this dreadful storm is coming.  I’ll have none of that!  Come inside before you catch your death of cold!”

        “I just wanted to borrow an umbrella,” Twilight shook her head, a smile creeping across her face.

        “Nonsense!  I will not have my friend out in this weather!  You can go to Zecora’s any time!”  Rarity insisted.  “Come in!  We were just about to have tea and cookies, courtesy of Pinkie Pie of course.”

        “She’s here too?”  Twilight asked, smiling at her friend’s generosity.  It was pointless to argue with her fellow unicorn when she was in an insistent mood.

        “No, but she came by earlier today.  Brought me a big platter of leftover cookies and said something about me not going to be able to fit in my dresses,” Rarity rolled her eyes, a slight smirk on her face.  “I’m glad Spikey Wikey came over, otherwise I probably would have eaten them all myself.”

        “I never figured you to do such a thing,” Twilight replied, setting her saddlebags by the door.

        “Stress does dreadful things to you, darling.  You know that,”  the white mare waved a hoof and gave a wink.  Twilight blushed at the slight towards her own mental breakdowns.  How she wished she would just gorge on junk food instead of acting like...

        “You like my robe?”  Spike asked, holding out his arms and spinning around to show it off.  “It’s so soft!”  He ran a hand over the opposite sleeve, enjoying the feeling against his scales.

        “You look adorable, Spike,” Twilight smirked, trotting into the center of the boutique’s lobby.  In the middle was an ornate iron table decorated with the cookie platter and a candelabra.  The flickering candles provided the only light in the room, and placed in front of the table was Rarity’s fainting couch.  “Are you sure it’s okay?  I mean, I don’t want to interrupt,”  her eyes landed on Spike and she flashed the dragon a reassuring smile.  Spike blushed, but smiled back.

“Oh nonsense!”  Rarity trotted over towards the table.  “We were just keeping each other company, isn’t that right?”  She rubbed a hoof on Spike’s head, drawing another blush from him.  “Have a seat!”  She gestured to the couch, which Twilight happily obliged.

“So, Spike says you found a book written in dragon?”  Rarity asked, levitating a cookie up to her mouth.  “I never thought those brutish beasts could be capable of such things,”  she glanced over to Spike, who wore a frown.  “Um...present company excluded of course.”

“I was going to see if Zecora could translate it for me,” Twilight replied, trying to hover a cookie of her own up to her hungry snout.  Her red aura blinked and fizzled out, dropping the treat back onto the plate.  “Darn...”  Rarity opened her mouth to voice her concern, but paused when she saw Twilight rub her temples with her hooves.

“Is everything alright, dear?”

“Hm?  Oh, yeah...I’m just...tired I guess.  Thank you for inviting me in out of the storm.”  A rumble of thunder signaled the storm’s arrival, and the soothing sound of rain pattering against the windows filled the silent foyer.

“Well, I certainly won’t have you two walk back home in this mess!”  Rarity looked out the window and shook her head.  “Looks like you’re spending the night with me.”  Spike didn’t even try to hide his joy.  Twilight just gave a weak smile, her eyes showing how exhausted she had become.  “There’s a spare bed in my inspiration room, feel free to make yourselves to home,” Rarity pointed to a room in the back.  “Spike, you can sleep on the sofa.”

The dragon gave an audible groan, making the unicorns chuckle a bit.  Rarity jerked her head to get her coif out of her eyes and blinked seductively.  “Unless, Spikey Wikey is scared of the big mean ol’ storm?”

Spike wanted to protest to being treated like a baby, but he caught on and kept his mouth shut.  He could be scared of the storm.  He nodded, trying not to let his poker face slip.  Rarity let out an undignified giggle at this display, then gave an exaggerated sigh.  “I suppose I could sleep out here with you, if it’ll make you feel safe.”

        The little dragon tried not to explode right there on the spot.  Twilight was too tired to muster anything but a smile, before dragging herself off to the room in the back for some much needed sleep.  Every step she took seemed to sap more of her energy, until she could barely acknowledge the boutique around her.  The unicorn never knew if she made it to the bed, because she was already asleep.

        Rarity hummed to herself as she prepped for the night, mud mask and cucumber slices in their proper places.  Her mane was done up in thick curls, the curlers almost too big for her head.  More adorned her tail, keeping them both in their signature style.  The white unicorn couldn’t help but chuckle at the jealousy other mares had over her mane style.  After checking all the locks and closing all the curtains, Rarity’s grin grew wider as thoughts of her Spikey Wikey cuddled up next to her began to play out.  She knew he was gentlecolt enough to not do anything rash.

The unicorn paused when she heard mumbling from a dark corner of the boutique.  Lighting her horn with magic, Rarity grabbed a nearby golf club and hovered it in striking position.  Ponyville never had a crime problem, per se.  But it helped to be prepared in case something other than a pony decided to take advantage of a lady and her hospitality.  Slowly she inched towards the source of the sound, subconsciously holding her breath.  The light of her horn fell on a form in the middle of the hallway, rising and falling gently with each breath it took.  A quick glance, and Rarity could see Twilight’s cutie mark.

The poor dear must be completely exhausted.  The white mare shook her head as she loosed a chuckle.  Using her magic, she gently began to drag her lavender companion to the spare bedroom.  Once Twilight was safely in bed, at the expense of messing up the finely made sheets, Rarity sighed in relief and once again returned to thoughts of being with Spike.

Finally making her way back to the foyer after her little distraction, she saw Spike could no longer wait for her and was fast asleep.  A smile crossed her lips as Rarity trotted quietly to the sofa and climbed on, positioning herself so Spike was resting against her flank.  He squirmed and buried himself deeper into Rarity’s side, between her flank and foreleg.  The unicorn blushed slightly, but thought nothing more of it as she rested her head on her hooves and drifted off into her own fashionable dream.

***

I was used to the vivid dreams that my overactive imagination could produce, but the one I was in the throes of currently was a bit too real for my liking.  The smell of flowers and dew overwhelmed me as I took in the surroundings.

It looked like the library, only bigger.  Instead of being housed within a tree, it was now filling an expanse of what appeared to be the Everfree Forest.  Sunlight gave everything an ethereal glow, drawing my attention to the elaborate dining table in the middle of it all.  I suddenly recognized this as my ‘happy place’ that I went to.  When stress threatened to make me do undesirable things, I would close my eyes and pretend to be here.  Sometimes it worked, sometimes not.  But it was an option all the same.

But I certainly didn’t relish this trip to my isle of seclusion for too long.  Because now sitting at the table was someone I thought I would never see again.  Logic stipulated that my imagination wouldn’t punish me like this.  But the back of my mind began compiling a detailed counterpoint that I didn’t like.  Could this be the reason for my behavior in the past?  I shuddered thinking about it.  All this time...

“Oh, hello there!”  The guest waved, an ignorant smile on his face.  “Come over!  Have a seat!  I’ve got wine, tea...oh...and cheese!”  He paused, blinking as he examined the contents of the overfilled table.  “Oh wait, no cheese...never mind....”

“What...what are you doing here?”  I asked, dumbfounded yet too shocked to do anything.  I wanted to sound angry, but the better part of me wanted to know more about this strange phenomena.

“What does it look like I’m doing?  I’m having tea in the garden,” he shrugged, gesturing to the teacup held in his paw.  “Don’t look at me like that!  I can be sensitive!”

“HOW are you here?”  I decided to change her question to a more direct one.

“Always seeking answers, but never willing to accept them when they come,” he shook his head,

tossing his teacup over his shoulder.  A loud explosion erupted from behind him, but neither of us flinched.  “You want the truth?  Fine!  I’m here because you put me here!”

“Why would I do something as foalish as that?!”  I snapped, reeling back in shock.

        “Well, not like you had a choice in the matter,” he shrugged.  “After all, you did crumble under my influence without me even being there!  You were so cute when you were vulnerable!”

        “GET OUT!”  I snapped, stomping a hoof.  The creature only laughed, making me blush slightly in embarrassment.  Finally, he stopped his laughter and wiped his eyes.

        “I can’t!  You’re keeping me here!  I am a product of your imagination after all.  Or...maybe I’m not...”  he gave a grin that made my skin crawl.

        “What’s your game, Discord?”  I narrowed my eyes, ready to charge at him and toss that damn table in his face if I had to.

        “No game,” Discord shrugged.  “Perhaps it’s some deep complex psychological issue.  I robbed you of your friends, you gave up all hope and folded like a lawn chair, then I popped up in your head to cause trouble later.  Sounds about right.”

        “That doesn’t make any sense!”  I shook my head violently.

        “Good!  That means I still got it!”  Discord flourished with his talon and gave a formal bow.  “Maybe it’s like that one disorder, where you sympathize with your captor?  For all I know, being so utterly devastated and alone made you think that’s how I felt.”

        “Please,” I rolled her eyes, ignoring the sickening feeling in my stomach at that logic.  “Like I would ever feel sorry for you.”

        “Oh you don’t have to feel sorry for me.  If anything, I should feel sorry for you.You see, Twilight Sparkle, while we’re here shooting the breeze and pointing fingers...or hooves in your case...at each other about why I’m here, something terrible is going on out...there,” Discord pointed to the sky.  My eyes followed and widened as I figured it out.

        “Is that why my magic wasn’t working?”  I asked, lowering my head to glare at Discord again.  My eyes must have betrayed my true feelings, as Discord gave an unnerving smile.

        “Oh, so NOW you want me to help you!  Here I thought you wanted me to leave!”  Discord made an over dramatic show of folding his arms and sticking his snout into the air.

        “Well, since I’m stuck with you I might as well make you useful,” I replied flatly.  Discord dropped his act and stared at me with a slightly dumbfounded expression.

        “My, my, my....every bit Celestia’s pupil...”  Discord shook his head slowly, a smile creeping across his lips.

        “What’s that supposed to mean?”  I snapped.  “What’s going on!”

        “I could tell you, Twilight...but then that would be boring!  No, it’ll be more fun to watch you find all this out for yourself, then come crawling to me on bloody hooves.”  Discord threw his arms in the air as if he was going to lunge at me and give me a hug.

        “I want answers!”  I snarled, my horn glowing hot as I prepared to launch some terrible spell at the mismatched beast before me.  Could I even do magic in dreams?  I didn’t know, but I wanted to find out.  Anything to wipe that disgusting grin off his face...

        “Why not ask Trixie?  She’s the reason for this darkness finding its way here, after all,” Discord sighed as he looked at his claws.  “I know how worried you are, after how bad you felt when you read that hilarious article about her.”

        “SHUT UP!”  I scrapped my hooves on the ground like I was ready to charge.

Does he know everything?  Oh, Celestia!

“Get out before I MAKE you leave!”  The flush from my anger, coupled with my heart racing, and the white hot glow from my horn made me feel unbearably hot,  My horn felt like it was ten times the size of my head as the abrasive magic coursed through it, waiting to unload into Discord’s ugly, stupid, face.

        “No, I think you’d want to apologize to Rarity instead,” Discord smirked as he prepared to snap his fingers.  That casual look of indifference in his eyes drove me crazy.  Almost as if he didn’t know the measures I would take to purge him from my brain.  Even if it meant doing something extreme.  I would not have this....this monster...idly playing with my personal thoughts and emotions!

Or perhaps, that smile meant he knew I would bore a hole in my skull to get rid of him...

        “Why would I ---”

***

        Twilight shot awake just as the blast from her horn launched, punching a hole in the wall across from her.  Rarity and Spike came barging into the room a few seconds later and froze at the sight before them.  The purple unicorn was soaked with cold sweat, the blankets crumpled into a heap on the floor.  The glow of her horn started to dull as she caught her breath.

        “Twilight!  What happened?”  Rarity finally asked, hoof to her chest in alarm.

        “Sorry...”  Twilight muttered, glancing down at her sweaty body.  Her stomach knotted at this sudden deluge of information.  Her normally analytical mind was now scrambling around frantically trying to make sense of all these things.  Why was Discord in her head?  How was he even there to begin with?  And what was he trying to warn her about?

        “I need a drink...”  the unicorn sighed, kicking her hind legs to sit up.  Her head began to spin at this sudden force, and she promptly fell off the mattress and onto the floor.

Paranoimia

"Come sweet slumber, enshroud me in thy purple cloak.  Hmm, doesn't even rhyme."

-Paranoimia (Art of Noise feat. Max Headroom)

Sweet Celestia, what have I done?!  I attempt to create and I only destroy!  What hell hath my hooves brought upon me?  I, a lowly scribe, attempting the impossible...now I’m confined to here.  I broke that window in the rec room I don’t know how many times.  It was funny, but only got me more punishment.  The wall of my room had to be scrubbed down because of my frantic writings.  I, Ponyman, was only trying to pen the next best story!  THE FOOLS!  They have no idea the pain and madness that I.....

“H-hey, Twi...”  I snapped my gaze up from the left behind notebook on the shelf and glared at Holly.  He seemed to flinch and back away, and he should.  He’s not my friend...nopony calls me ‘Twi’ but my friends!

“Hellooooo, Holly,” my eyes narrowed at that word as my stare lingered on him. I could see he was nervous.  I must have that effect on ponies lately.  After a few seconds of letting him sweat, I walked back to the couch and took my seat.  “Well,” I sighed, striking my best ‘Rarity drama pose’.  “Ready whenever you are.”

“Actually...Twilight,” he stammered.  I could tell he was choosing his words carefully, but that didn’t mean I had to like them anyway.  “I know what your file says about you but,” he paused, eyes searching for the right way to continue.  “I would rather hear it straight from the horse’s mouth.”

I forced my best smile, hoping that it would convey that he wasn’t the least bit funny.  If he was just going to joke about this, I should leave right now.  But all I had to go back to was my bed, so I decided to play along.  It was a nice change of scenery, after all.  “Not exactly a soup question, is it?”

“Take it as you want,” he gave a sly smile.  Either he was impressed with my movie knowledge or he thought I was being that cute kind of crazy again.  He sat in the tall backed chair across from me and leaned forward, “But don’t flatter yourself.”

I turned my head to face him once again, cocking a brow.  “Isn’t it a bit rude to ask about somepony without introducing yourself first?”  Of course I knew who he was.  He told me his name before.  But hopefully he’ll play right into my hooves.  Once I had him cornered, I could barter my way out of here.  He seemed to squirm in his seat slightly, as if unsure what I was up to.  Perfect...

“Well, what do you want to know?”

I glanced to the wall opposite of me, and there was Discord, as always.  He was gesturing and motioning and mouthing something.  I lingered on his frantic image for a few moments, trying to parse out what he was saying.  He finally gave up his game and frowned.  “Ask him if he’s lying!”  he whispered.

“How will I know you aren’t lying to me?”  I finally asked, returning my stare to him.  He must’ve been watching me intently when I was busy.  That kind of creeped me out.

“How do I know you won’t lie to me?”  He gave a chuckle, but I only stared daggers at him.  He thought he was cute, huh?

“Fine,” I sighed.  “Fair enough.  Do you believe any of the things I have told you up to this point?”

“Right to the point, huh?”  He was smirking again.  But his eyes betrayed he didn’t have an honest answer for me.  “I don’t think you’re lying...”  I felt my face relax as relief washed over me.  Finally he believed me!  Now to see if I could... “”Unfortunately, at this point it’s the best answer I can give you.  I’m sorry.”

All at once the weight returned.  My ears folded back as I bit my lip.  “I suppose that’s alright.  I don’t think you would let me go with just that then, huh?”

“No can do,” he shook his head.  That blue mullet of his looked ridiculous.

“Figures,” I rolled my eyes.

“I don’t exactly know how long we’ll be at this, but I know you’re not insane,”  he continued.  “Nopony that done the things you did would suddenly go insane that quick.”  I tried not to smirk.  How little he knew.  But that wasn’t my fault, was it?  It was Discord that drove me to do those things in the name of filing a friendship report on time.  Right?

        “Your point?”  I asked, trying to end this while I could still breathe.  The room felt smaller all of the sudden, and the nagging voice of Discord in my ear made me think that Holly was making fun of me.

        His chest seemed to puff out a bit as he smiled.  Did I walk into his gambit?  “If you need something, anything from the outside...just...Oh, I don’t know...” he rolled his eyes playfully.  “Happen to mention it in passing.”

He wasn’t serious, was he?  I would have to test this theory later.  Right now, I just wanted out.  Holly seemed to notice my plight, and decided to let me go to stretch my legs, so I opted to take a walk around the halls.  Maybe I could learn something from all of this?  It was kind of sad that the only pony that seemed to have any sense around here wasn’t even qualified to diagnose me for anything.

        “Lyra,” I heard that name before.  Her and Amethyst Star were in Canterlot with me all those years ago.  Or maybe it hasn’t been that long?  I don’t remember.

“You have got to stop this...”  the voice continued from down the hall. I decided to investigate.  Not even the sight of Discord in a nurse outfit would deter me from seeing this through.  Coming to a stop near a room, I felt kinda bad for listening in.  But my natural curiosity got the better of me once again.

        I peered through the small window in the door to see Lyra sitting in her strange position upon the bed.  The cream colored earth pony, who I assumed was Bonbon, stood next to her with a frown on her face.  The mint colored unicorn seemed depressed at something, her forehoof reaching out to a glass like she was expecting to grab it.  After a few minutes of appearing to try and will the glass into her hoof, she gave up and thumped it back on the mattress.  Maybe she was having trouble using her magic?  But why would she be here?

        “You know, Twilight.  They say if you stare too long into the void it stares back,” Discord spoke, snapping me from my thoughts.  I turned my head and came face to face with him, then leapt back out of instinct.

        “What do you mean?”  I narrowed my eyes.  I didn’t want to risk attacking him and looking like an idiot.  “You’re the reason I’m here, aren’t you?!  This is all part of your sick game!”

        “Oh pah!”  He waved a claw, his face showing disinterest.  “Always blame the god of chaos.  Why can’t you ever take responsibility for yourself?”  He followed my stare back to the window, where Lyra was once again reaching out for the glass.  What was she doing?  Whatever it was, Bonbon seemed to disapprove.

        “They think I’m crazy, don’t they?”  I finally asked.  It was an obvious answer, but somehow I felt if he said no I would believe it.

        “Yes they do,” he smiled.  “But not because of what you think.”  He pointed to himself and winked before vanishing again.

        “Twilight?  You can come back now,”  Holly called to me from down the hall.  Seems I didn’t wander too far after all.  Not that I could escape anyway.  I would teleport out of here, but my magic was still not functioning.  With a sigh of defeat, I trotted back to the room where I would once again recall things and hope the nice pony would continue to listen.  I swore that when I looked into his eyes, he was trying not to laugh.

        “You remind me of one of my friends,” I muttered, eyes locked onto his cheesy smile.

        “Really?  Why not tell me more about them?”  Holly replied, holding the door open for me.  Why was he being so nice?  Was this just to butter me up for something terrible later?  I swore I felt him staring at me in an unprofessional manner, but I ignored that feeling for the one of impending dread.

***

        Rainbow Dash was every bit the weather she helped to maintain.  Uncontrollable, unpredictable, and always on the move.  So to say it was a strange sight to see her sitting in a booth at Sugarcube Corner would be an understatement.  According to her, sweets in vast quantities gave her a headache because her body processed them too fast.  Yet, here she was, her snout buried in yet another Daring Do book.  It was odd seeing the likes of Rainbow Dash be such a...well...’nerd’. But it wasn’t her fault the things she deemed cool fell under that category.  Though she could buck anyone who called her out on it, so there was that self assurance.

        “Hey Dashie, want some more? ~”  The rainbow pegasus looked up from her reading to see Pinkie with another tray filled to the top with cookies of all kinds.  Her glance then turned to the already three equally stuffed trays on the table.

        “Uh...not really.  I’m glad you invited me over to help get rid of the day old stuff, but...I’ve got a wicked bad tummy ache.”  Her words fell on deaf ears.  Or maybe Pinkie just didn’t hear her over the sound of her own glutinous revelry.  Dash wondered to herself if that’s how Pinkie got her boundless energy, as it didn’t seem possible for a pony to be that...random by nature alone.

        In reality, Pinkie was fueled by her friends and their happiness.  Every pony and non-pony in Ponyville was a tiny power source, and when one of them went out, she could feel it.  Rainbow Dash had the misfortune of seeing Pinkie at her worst once, and that only strengthened their bond more than ever.  It also didn’t help that Dash was the reason Pinkie started smiling in the first place.  This revelation lead to her clinging to her 'Dashie' more than ever, and rivaling even Scootaloo in the fan department.  Dash thought it was cute at first, but could never let go of that lingering guilt that her contributing in that lie lead to Pinkie’s condition.

        Applejack couldn’t lie to save her soul, but Dash usually prided herself for such a skill.  Except when it came to her friends, and now apparently, especially to Pinkie.  For the colors most vibrant always faded the most.  As penance, Dash agreed to go pranking with her, only to have Gilda the Gryphon get in the way.  Later on, they learned that Dash’s loyalty isn’t just because it was her Element.  She had the knack of befriending the misfits and outcasts.  The abrasive Gilda and the gangly Fluttershy were the two best friends she had.  Unfortunately, Gilda shown that she was lousy at picking these friends sometimes, and she probably gotten burned by others before.  She didn’t want them to feel that way because of her.

        It was commendable of her, but the others didn’t pay it much mind.  But then Twilight started noticing Dash and Pinkie hanging out more often than usual.

        Of course, she was too wrapped up in her current predicament to care about this sudden chemistry.  If anything, she found herself stuffing her face with sweets as well, blushing at the confused staring from Dash sitting across from her.

        “You look terrible, Twi,” Dash finally replied, as if she just noticed the unicorn sitting there.  Twilight didn’t really make a scene of coming in, nor did she want to interrupt the pegasus.  That would be rude.  “What’s up?”

        “I don’t know,” Twilight sighed.  How would she even go about explaining what happened last night?  “I guess I just had a bad dream is all.”

        “OH!  It wasn’t the bad dream where I capture Dashie and...”  Pinkie began, but she was cut off with a hoof.

        “NO!  Celestia, no!”  Twilight snapped.  “Something weird is going on.  There was a storm last night and...”

        “Yeah, sorry about that,” Dash butted in, rubbing the back of her head with a hoof.  “It was already to Ponyville before I got the call, so I figured I’d let it ride out and make up for it later.”

        “It wasn’t just the storm.  I...I think Discord might be back,” the unicorn's shoulders slumped.

        “How?”  Pinkie asked, suddenly turning serious.  “Didn’t we turn him back into stone?  Wait....” Pinkie switched to her normal self again.  “Discord made a storm and you didn’t invite ME?!  You kept all that chocolate milk to yourself?!  That’s not fair!”

        “There was no chocolate milk!”  Twilight replied, sounding a bit more harsh than she wanted too.  Her face was buried in her hooves at that point, so she couldn’t tell if I hurt Pinkie's feelings or not.  “He was in my dreams, and he was telling me he’s in my head.”

        “In your head, huh?”  Dash smirked, hovering up from her seat.  The unicorn dreaded whatever she had planned as she began eyeing her, hoof to chin as if in deep thought.  “I don’t see him.”  Typical, Dash the smartass...

        “No, Dashie!  You got to knock, like this!”  Pinkie butted in, tapping a hoof against her friend's already aching head.  Twilight wanted to lash out, but kept her calm.  The visual she got of Discord answering a door with a towel wrapped around him only made the mood more sour.  It must’ve been obvious because both of them backed off, blushing with embarrassment.

        “This is serious, guys...” the unicorn seethed.  “If Discord is up to something, we have to find out what!”  It was then she thought of that book.  Was that the reason for what was happening?  She didn’t even read it!

        “Hey, remember when you went all loco in the coco and made everypony fight over that doll because you wanted to write a friendship report?  You kind of acted just like him!  Only without the chocolate rain and stuff...”  Pinkie waved a hoof, as if blowing off my lame imitation of him.

Oh, Celestia!  I DID act just like him!

        “And remember when you told Pinkie you were going to try and stop time because you were afraid of what was going to happen to you?”  Dash added, smiling somewhat.  Maybe such a grandiose plan would impress her.  It did sound like the plot to a Daring Do story.

        “Yes, Rainbow...I remember...thank you...”  Well, so much for seeking solace in her friends.  Wait, no...!  That was the kind of attitude that made me succumb to him in the first place!  This is all his doing again!  Of course!

“Twilight, you okay?”  Dash tilted her head.  That look of concern was no longer genuine to the lavender mare.  All of this is some elaborate Discord hoax!

“GET AWAY FROM ME!”  Twilight shouted, leaping from her seat and teleporting out of the bakery.

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash didn’t know exactly what happened at that moment.  All they knew was Twilight screamed at them, and vanished in a flash of light and the smell of ozone.  They knew first hoof of Discord’s influence, but had no idea how deep it ran with poor Twilight.  To have the very things, the very ponies you’ve come to love, turn on you so violently...it was too sad to think about.

“What’s her beef?”  Dash snorted, slumping back in her seat.  “This is...what?  The third time Twi’s lost it?  I’m worried about her.”

Pinkie Pie was all too familiar with ‘losing it’, as Dash so casually called it.  Another one of her happiness pilot lights was about to burn out, and the party pony could already feel the sadness coming over her.  If she wasn’t careful, they would start to creep back into her life.  “Maybe I should talk to her.”

Dash noticed this shift in demeanor.  It was one of her traits, after all.  Reading a pony was just like reading a book.  But Dash had no mood for musing about this irony.  Her day was already shot anyway.  Pinkie was in a sad mood, which meant no chance to...

NO!Dash scolded herself.  Twi’s more important!Before she could say anything, Pinkie was already gone.  How she managed to slip away like she did was a mystery.  No wonder she made a good Mare Do Well.  But that was for another time.  With a snort of disapproval, Dash lazily lifted herself by flapping the tips of her wings half heartedly.  Shoving a few cookies in her mouth to drown out the taste of feeling sick,  she made it outside where she spread her wings and shot off into the blue.

Pinkie, meanwhile, noticed that Twilight had left a book on the table.  “Oh!  This looks important!  I better bring this to her before she misses it!”  She grabbed the book in her teeth and carried it over to her saddlebag behind the counter.  “Now don’t you worry, Auntie Pinkie Pie will make sure you’re back safe and sound with Twilight!”  She dumped some of the leftover cookies into the bag as well, making a mess of things before flinging them onto her back and taking off out the door.

How Pinkie managed to make any progress with her unusual bounding gait was anypony’s guess, but there was no denying that the display made others smile.  In the end, that was all she wanted.  If anypony knew what Twilight went through losing her friends that fateful day with Discord, it was her.  Loneliness was a terrible feeling nopony should have to experience.  Arriving at the Books and Branches library with surprising speed, Pinkie hammered on the door.

Spike begrudgingly answered, only to be met with a faceful of hooves.  “OW!”  He yelped, falling backwards.  He rubbed his nose to make sure it wasn’t bleeding, then got to his feet. “Pinkie, what’s going on?”

“Twilight forgot her book!”  Pinkie exclaimed, pulling said tome from her saddlebag.  The fancy inlaid cover and gold unicorn head were now smeared with spots of melted chocolate.  Spike cringed at the sight before regaining composure.  He could smell cookies.

“Uh...thanks...” the dragon muttered, taking the book gingerly in between his thumb and claw.  The look on his face shown that Twilight would probably kill him for messing up her book.

“Can I talk to her?  She seemed super duper upset and I wanted to make her smile again!  That’s my thing ya know?”  Pinkie bounced in place.  If she was upset herself, she did a darn good job of hiding it.

“I guess you ---”  Spike was cut off as Pinkie dashed into the lobby and looked around.  She could hear sobbing coming from upstairs, and headed up to Twilight’s room with a sudden burst of speed.  Peering her head into the darkened room, she could make out Twilight’s form in front of the window.  The curtains were closed so no light could shine into her heart.  Pinkie nodded, knowing that she had to bring the sunlight to her.

“Twilight...”  she began, slowly approaching the ladder that lead to the bed.  “I kind of know how you feel and...”

“GET AWAY FROM ME!”  Twilight squirmed back on the bed, pressing against the window.  Her eyes darted about the room until they landed on the pink pony below her.  Suddenly, her voice didn’t sound like Discord’s anymore when she spoke.

“I know what you’re going through.  When that mean meany pants Discord hurt me, I felt really bad.  I wasn’t myself but I was aware of what I was doing.  Those memories still bother me, and I’m forever thankful that you all forgave me.”  Pinkie stared at the floor.  Twilight had never seen the bouncy pony so vulnerable.  Why was she acting like this?  Was it because of the sudden lack of happiness she was getting from Twilight?

“Of course,” Twilight replied, hesitating slightly.  She didn’t know if this was all a lie or not.  Her friends had never let her down before.  “And...I guess I appreciate you sticking with me.”

Pinkie smiled that infectious smile once more, causing one to form on Twilight’s own face.  “You ever need a pony to talk to, I”m here!  What else in the world is more innocent than a real smile?”  With those words, she turned and bounded down the stairs.  Twilight could hear the yelp of Spike and the sound of a poor dragon being landed on by a heavy pony.

She was right.  There was nothing more innocent than a smile.  But how genuine could her smile be when she had no innocence left?

***

“Pinkie was surprisingly observant of my problem.  It was then I realized just how deep her love for her friends ran and how important we are to her.  It was touching, but also kind of sad in a way,” I sighed.  “That’s why you remind me of her.”  My head turned to the side so I could give him my best pleading look.  “Can I go now, please?”

Holly seemed lost in thought for a moment, his hoof to his chin.  “Twilight, I think tomorrow I’ll bring in a little treat!”  I could feel that pressure returning to the air around me.  Why was he doing this?  “A way to celebrate our progress...so far.”

“And you won’t get in trouble for this?”  I asked, cocking a brow.  “I don’t want to be a burden on ---”

“It’ll be my treat,” Holly cut me off by raising a hoof.  “Maybe we can talk about a different subject too?”

I smiled.  Now was my chance to put him to the test.  He just has to let me out of here.  “Well, we could talk about how my isolated childhood and privileged studies led to me being a social outcast...”

Holly blinked as he processed what I said.  Could he detect my sarcasm?  I was always terrible when it came to that.  “We could...though I’ll admit, I could get used to seeing you smile more often!”  He gave a smile of his own.  “I mean, what else in the world is more innocent than a real smile?”

I frowned, which made his smile disappear too.  What kind of foal did he take me for?  “Yeah, sounds great,” I replied flatly.  “But you have to give me a reason to smile.  You’re no Pinkie Pie.”  I stared at the ceiling, trying to hold back tears.  “You have no idea how it feels...”

“I’m...not trying to be?”  Holly stammered.  “Um...well, let’s see.  There’s plenty to smile for, Twilight.  Like the little things in life.”  I glanced over to him, hoping he’d get the hint to be quiet.  “Or your accomplishments.  I mean you’re pretty well known, if not for being Celestia’s student, than for your magical feats.”  He continued to talk but I was no longer listening.  Someone else had my attention at the moment.

Yeah, all the ponies fear you just as much as they fear Celestia...if not moreso...

“I won’t patronize you and tell you to cheer up.  You’re smarter than that,”  Holly continued, and I snapped my stare back to him.  “But, is being depressed really helping anypony?”

“Is keeping the all powerful unicorn who can stop the end of the world here in this room helping anypony?”  There was that sarcasm again.  Maybe he’d give up and leave?

“Well, by that logic Ms. Great and Powerful Twilight,” he replied.  Maybe he didn’t mean to sound hurtful, but that’s the way it felt.  My face ran hot as I gritted my teeth.  “How can you protect anypony if you’re so intent on being so...so....”

“Blase?”  I finished for him.  I couldn’t help but smile.  I glanced over to see Discord slowly shaking his head.  I could see Holly frown somewhat.  Here he was trying to help, and I was being conceited and stuck up.  Guess I should’ve got a cutie mark for sarcasm.

“Yeah!  I mean, I’m no hero like you.  I can’t even get a pretty mare to smile!”  I rolled my eyes.  Now he was flirting with me?  I should say something to the staff.  “But best believe I’m not moping about it!”  Did he just wipe his eyes?

“A book...”  I replied, snapping my stare back to him.  Now was my chance to distract him.  My stomach knotted as guilt for using his kindness washed over me.  What was wrong with me?

“What?”  Holly tilted his head.  He seemed eager to help me.

“You said I could have anything brought from outside,” I rolled over onto my stomach and looked him in the eye.  “I need a book.  Well, several books actually.”

“Um, sure...alright...” he shrugged.  “What am I looking for exactly?”

“Just go to the library in Ponyville and talk to Spike.  He’ll know what I want,” I tried to sound a bit ominous, seeing if he’d flinch or be uncomfortable.

“Spike?”  Holly seemed a bit too excited for my liking.  Now I felt bad for sending this...this...whatever he’s supposed to be, to him.  “Yeah, sure...I’ll have those books here ASAP!”

“Well, looks like this was a pretty good session, huh?”  Yeah, I suppose so.  “Honestly, Twilight?  I think you’ll be out of here before you know it!”  I rolled my eyes again.  I might be out, but would I still have a home to go to?  But, that’ll give me time to explore around and see what’s really going on.  I smiled again, making Holly smile in return.  This was a successful session.

“Anything else?”  The stallion was anxious now.  Like he wanted to finish up so he could leave for something.  The way he acted when I mentioned Spike gave me a bad feeling that was his intention.  I didn’t like this guy.

“I am kind of hungry...”  My friends used to joke that in order to keep me content was to feed me all day.  In a way they were right, but I would never admit that.  I prided my ability to stay somewhat fit despite my unhealthy habits.  I can’t think when I’m hungry, and I grow unstable when I can’t think.  It was such a simple equation, I couldn’t believe it.

“Well, what would you like?”  Holly asked, shifting in his seat a bit.  “You can have pretty much anything here.  I’ll leave a word with the orderly to come take your order.”

“Thank you,” I sighed.  The realization that I hadn’t eaten anything since I got here was starting to catch up to me.  Holly left the room, and that heavy air returned once more.  There was something about him I didn’t like, and I felt bad for subjecting poor Spike to whatever he had in store.  The empty space in the doorway was filled with the presence of a large white stallion.  A pegasus.  I remembered him!  He was that musclehead that I was surprised could fly at all!  Where did he get those sunglasses?  They looked familiar.

“Uh, you the orderly?”  I asked, afraid of his immense size.

“YEEEEAAAAHHHH!”  His nostrils flared, blowing what looked like steam from them.  I glanced at his name tag.

        “Well then...um...Duke?”  He didn’t give a response so I guess that was right.  “Do you have daisy sandwiches?”

        “YEEEEAAAAAHHHH!”

        This was going to be a long night.  At least Holly will be gone so I can poke around.

So Cold

“Show me how it ends, it’s all right. Show me how defenseless you really are.”

-So Cold (Breaking Benjamin)

        It wasn’t exactly hard for Holly to find the Books and Branches Library in Ponyville proper.  He passed by it all the time in his travels.  He never paid much attention to the strange tree with windows until today, when he learned there was a dragon inside.  A small, approachable...dragon.  Heart pounding in his ears in anticipation, he raised a shaky hoof to knock on the door.

Inside the library, Spike groaned in frustration.  It was bad enough being without Twilight, but it was even worse when the others kept coming by asking when she would be back.  He didn’t know, and seeing their dejected looks made him feel worse.  The little dragon began to think she was never coming back.  The knocking grew louder, and Spike shook his head.  If it was those two ponies with their friendship pamphlets again he was going to...

Nah, he couldn’t do that.  He was a gentlecolt after all.  He looked back to Peewee standing on the table in front of him.  The tiny pheonix tilted its head in confusion at Spike’s change in attitude.  “Sorry, Peewee.  Playtime is over for now.”  He put down the ball he held in his claws and walked to the door.  The knocking was now an annoying rhythm as Spike grabbed the handle and flung the door open.

His mind didn’t have time to register what was going on, as all he saw was a stallion starring at him almost seductively.  His mouth a giant Pinkie Pie worthy grin as he dove for the tiny dragon.

***

        All the ponies in this town are crazy!  That’s what I once told myself.  Turns out, not only was I correct in my assumption, they were also contagious.  An entire year’s worth of misadventures and social issues culminated in the manifestation of chaos personified, who now decided to take up residence in my already addled brain.  In a way, it’s all their fault I’m in this mess.  I sometimes wondered if all of this was some sort of crucible set up by Princess Celestia, to see if I’m a worthy successor to the throne someday?  I’m already technically family, so it isn’t out of the realm of possibility.

        But if this was indeed all a test, then I have failed her spectacularly.  Discord was always ranting to me about how he can help prevent me making the same mistakes as the Princess.  At least she knew how to cope with the situation.  All I did was...wind up here...

        Maybe I should snoop around a bit?  After all, I am kind of an amateur sleuth.  I distracted Holly for a reason, so better not waste time.  Where should I look first?  My file?  Some offices?  Would this even be possible?  Maybe if I could somehow get a message through Spike to the others to act as my street team then I can....

        No...it’s their fault I’m in here.  They would just make things worse.  So this is what losing faith feels like?  Discord said something about it before, but I was adamant in my stance.  I would never give up on my friends again.  In a way, I didn’t.  They gave up on me it seems.  What bothered me even more was why Princess Celestia didn’t intervene in all of this.  Does she think I deserve to be locked away too?  Why didn’t she come to visit?  Or at the very least petition for my release?  Perhaps she fears I’m another Nightmare Moon in the making?  Or she feels it’s her fault all this pressure she heaped on me did this.

        Great, I made my mentor feel guilty.  Way to go.  In truth, I was all too happy to help Celestia with any problems that may arise.  I never thought of it in any light other than saving the world and better bonding with my friends.  It was Discord who gave a new slant on things.  How I wasn’t a hero at all, just Celestia’s go to pony to clean up her messes.  Nightmare Moon was partially her fault, and she admits that.  But Discord’s tone hinted that there was something more between him and her that he wasn’t going to tell me.

        Of course, that bastard always tried to play the sympathy card.  I never believed a word he told me until it actually happened.  Which, I guess, is why I’m here instead of doing what I should be doing.  I didn’t believe him about the others ignoring my warnings.  In fact, it seemed more like they were blaming me for it...

        I am kind of curious what my file says about me though.  Holly said it didn’t mention my, less than stellar moments.  I want to trust him, but it’s so damn hard!  He’s been better support than the rest of my friends, which I noticed haven’t come to visit me either.  They’re probably off trying and failing to stop the darkness that I tried to warn them about.  Serves them right for ignoring me!

        Maybe I can make some new friends?  Holly seems nice enough, and I would like to reconnect with Lyra again.  That’s what I’ll do!  I’ll pay Lyra a visit!  She is right down the hall from me.  With images of talking to a pony I actually like fresh in my mind, I made my way to the door.

        “They’re watching you, Twilight.  I’d be careful snooping around,” Discord warned me as my hoof touched the door handle.  It was odd going back to doing things with my hooves, since my magic still wasn’t working.  I pushed open the door quietly and glanced down both ends of the hall.  Nopony was around, which meant I could sneak down to Lyra’s room no problem.  This is just like when I was a filly in the castle at Canterlot!

        A giddy thrill shot through me as I tip-hoofed down the hall, stealing glances every now and again to make sure nopony saw me.  Finally I was back to Lyra’s room, and I looked through the small window in the door.  She wasn’t attempting to reach for that glass anymore, and instead seemed resigned to playing her lyre.  How she got it was anypony’s guess, but I bet Holly had something to do with it.  I knocked lightly, watching her eyes snap to the door.  They seemed to light up when they saw me and she came and opened the door.

        “Twilight?  Have you come to visit me?”  She asked, looking me over.  She noticed the same gown she had on and frowned.  “Oh...”

        “Yeah, long story.  Why are you here?”  I asked, trying to change the subject.  I came here to not think about myself.

        “Well...” she hesitated, staring at the floor.  A shaky hoof brushed through her silvery mane.  “Bonbon felt that it was in our best interest that I....seek help...”

        “For what?”

        “Everything, I guess.  The way I sit, the way I grab things with my hooves.  She thinks it’s weird and it scares her.  She doesn’t believe me when I talk about humans either.”  Lyra frowned.  “But she still loves me though, that stupid silly mare...”

        “I hardly think that’s grounds to be committed to here,” I shook my head.  Lyra only shrugged, not making eye contact the entire time.  It was a shame though.  She had such pretty orange eyes.  “I’m sorry I haven’t stayed in touch as much as I should.  I see you around town all the time.”

        “Nah, it’s cool.  We have our lives to live.  I haven’t talked to Amethyst Star in a while either,” Lyra waved a hoof.

        “Oh I saw her!”  I exclaimed, sitting on the edge of the bed,  “She was at the Sisterhooves Social!  Said she was volunteering in the ‘big brother, big sister’ program.  Really helped Derpy a lot since Dinky wanted to participate.”

“That sounds like her.  I’ve been playing my lyre around town and in the park.  Get some bits here and there.  Bonbon gave me a part-time job at her cafe too.  But I can’t do anything while stuck in here,” Lyra frowned again, her eyes misting up as she looked at me.

“I know how that feels,” I muttered.  I glanced up to see a blue mare standing in the doorway.  Her violet eyes seemed frantic as she looked about the room then stared right at me.  “Oh, am I doing something wrong?”

The sky blue mare only barked.  So that’s who was barking!  She then narrowed her eyes at me and growled.

“No, I’m not trying to escape!  Just catching up with a friend,”  I gestured to Lyra.  The mare nodded and left me to talk.  That was strange, but I figured it wasn’t worth pursuing.

“You better get back to your room.  Don’t want to get in trouble now,” Lyra smiled, though her voice sounded hurt.

“Okay...I’ll try to keep in better touch with you.  I promise.  It’s just...I’ve been so caught up in studying, and helping the Princess and playing hero and...”

“If all I ever care about in life is the imprints I make in this world, then the most I’ll ever leave is a grave,” Lyra replied, her voice even and perhaps a bit melodic.  I wouldn’t expect anything less poetic from a bard like her.

“I’ll keep that in mind...”  I muttered.  “Thank you.”  With that, I left the room.  The sound of Lyra’s lyre accompanying my exit, almost like melancholy theme music.  I walked back towards my room when I saw another door slightly open.  Peeking my head in, it was some kind of small office.  Papers littered the table and floor and there was a tape player among the debris.  My natural curiosity got the better of me and a trembling hoof reached out to push the play button.

“Doctor Anderson, Day Three: Still no progress made with patient Twilight Sparkle.  If she is so adamant in her refusal of my help, then I have other matters to tend to anyway.  But...since policy stipulates that all patients must have a doctor, I think I’ll have a little fun.  Ms. Sparkle wants to be stubborn?  Fine!  I’ll dump her off on that new kid!  He seems dense enough to tolerate her.  Maybe he would even be gullible enough to think he can make progress!”

“Day Six.  Patient Lyra Heartstrings seems to be making some progress.  Though I know of several species with hands, some of which are fellow colleagues in my field; I can’t help but think that the ‘hands’ Ms. Heartstrings are referring to, don’t belong to any creature of this world.  The closest I can equate is possibly primate in origin, but her wild theories sound nothing like that.”

“The patient that only refers to himself by the strange moniker of Ponyman, seems to have regressed once again.  Heavy sedation was in order this time, as we could only tolerate so much property damage.  In a way, he has shown me my errors.  Becoming too obsessed on a goal isn’t healthy.  Maybe I could use a vacation.”

        So I wasn’t the only crazy one here.  Least I was in good company.  Sounds to me like the staff is just as disturbed as they think we are.  As I pondered this, the burn of sleep began to make itself known on the backs of my eyes.  This was enough exploring for today, Holly should be back soon.  I wonder what’s keeping him?

***

        “I SAID LET GO OF ME!”  Spike shouted, trying to pry the hooves wrapped around his waist.  The stallion didn’t relent, poking and prodding every place he could find.  Somewhere in the back of his mind, Spike wondered when he was going to be cut open for research.

        “This is way too unreal!  Your scales are so shiny!  I heard they’re fixed in place.  Does that mean they can’t come off?  If they don’t, how do you grow?  Do you grow with them or shed like a reptile?  Are you fireproof on the inside as well as the outside?  I bet you can breath all kinds of things too, like water, ice, bubbles....maybe even lighting!  How many hearts do dragons have?  Are you....”

        Spike didn’t hear any of this as he continued to struggle.  He really didn’t want to belch fire into the guy’s face, but at the same token, his rapid fire questions gave him a headache.  So this is what would happen if Pinkie Pie got a sex change and took up a hobby?  “Aren’t...you....going to...”  Spike couldn’t breathe under the sudden pressure of a bear hug,  At least he thought it was a hug, but the poking of something in his ribs made him think otherwise.

        “Hm?”  The stallion finally came back to reality and released the dragon from his vice grip.  Spike fell to the floor in a heap, shuddering in terror and gasping for air.  “Oh...My name is Holly.  I came here for....”  His eyes grew a bit distant as he tried to recall his initial visiting purpose.  “Oh!  That’s right!  Books!”

        “Well, this is a library.  You have a card?”  Spike managed to regain enough composure to go into customer service mode.  Things certainly livened up around the library when Twilight reopened it to the public.

        “Oh, no.  They’re not for me,” Holly waved a hoof.  “They’re for Twilight, you see I’m her...”

        “Twilight?!”  Spike’s feral eyes lit up with happiness he thought he forgot.  “Is she okay?  Is she coming home?  Can I come visit her?”

        Holly blinked at this sudden turn of events.  He was supposed to be the one asking questions, after all.  “I can’t honestly say.  That depends on her good behavior and other factors.  Now, she said to speak with you about some books for her.”

        Spike scratched his head, then snapped his claws.  “Oh!  Yeah, she has a pile of her favorite books when she goes on trips and stuff.  Light reading.  I’ll go get them!”

        “Wait, hold on!”  Holly spoke up.  Before Spike could ask what was going on, Holly grabbed him up again and looked him over once more.  Spike noticed Holly’s eyes come to a rest on his most private of areas.  “I wonder...”

        “Could you put me down, please?”  Spike began to squirm.  He was really terrified of this guy now.

        “Oh, yeah...sorry,” Holly blushed.  “Just curious is all.”  He put Spike back onto the floor and watched as the dragon took off at full speed up the stairs.   After a few minutes of self recovery and emotional therapy, Spike re-emerged from the upstairs bedroom with an armload of books.  Each step was shaky and hesitant as he tried to find footing.

        “A little help would be nice!”  Spike grumbled.  Holly got the hint and grabbed a few in his forehooves.  Soon the two were safely down the stairs, looking at the giant pile.

        “THIS is light reading?”  Holly starred in shock.

        “Well, yeah,” Spike replied, his smile beaming.  “Twilight is like, the Rainbow Dash of reading!  She’ll probably send you for more tomorrow!”

        Holly shook his head in disbelief.  “Wow...”

        “I appreciate you doing this, no matter how creepy you are,” Spike added, giving a weak salute.  “I hope Twilight is okay.”  He blinked as a thought came to him.  “You know, I’ve heard everything out of you but an apology.”

        “An...apology?”  Holly shook his head.  “Oh, right...sorry...it’s just...you’re a dragon and...”

        “It’s okay,” Spike raised a claw.  “Dragons are pretty rare around Ponyville, and I seem to be the only one nice enough for ponies to talk to.”  He smiled, “Just don’t ask for any loose teeth or body parts!”

        Holly chuckled, blushing slightly.  “Uh, yeah...”  His eyes drifted back to the pile of books.  “You got a bag for this?”

        Spike nodded and rushed to the nearby closet.  After some frantic digging and banging, he emerged with Twilight’s saddle bag.  “Ya know, Holly.  I think purple is really your color.”

        Holly, the ever oblivious stallion he was, took that as a compliment.  “Yeah, it really brings out my eyes.”

        Spike could only roll his as he packed the custom made bags with the books.  “Just don’t rub your crazy off on Twilight.”

        “Not if she rubs off on me first!”  Holly smirked.

        “Don’t joke like that,” Spike turned serious for a moment.  “Oh!  Before I forget, here.”  He handed Holly a scale, shiny and purple in the light.

        “Oh wow!  Thank you!  I can’t wait to...um....” the stallion regained composure.  “Thank you.”

        “Take care of Twilight.  You look like the kind of guy she could use right now,” Spike frowned.  He wished he could be there for her.  He also found it a bit unsettling that the others haven’t gone to visit her either.

        “I will, Spike.  She knows you’re waiting for her, so I’m sure she’ll make a speedy recovery!”

***

        I snapped awake at the sound of hooves echoing in the hallway.  I slowly climbed from the comfort of my bed and made my way to the door.  I heard a muffled voice as I approached, and slowly opened the door to peer out.  There was that pegasus again, standing at the end of the hallway.

        “Uh...it’s something from home?”  That voice was Holly no doubt.  I stuck my head out further to see past that wall of muscle.  Holly was indeed standing there, looking almost miniscule compared to the behemoth of a pegasus blocking his way.  My saddle bags were draped over Holly’s back, and he didn’t even act the least bit embarrassed.

        Duke, that mountain of a pony, shook his head.  “Look,” Holly sighed.  “I really don’t want to pull this card, but what pony put in a good word for you around here?”  Duke looked visibly hurt at this remark.  I too thought it was kind of mean spirited, but coming from Holly, it made me smile.  Maybe he didn’t practice what he preached after all.  Duke stepped to the side, not meeting his stare.  Holly nodded and continued down the hall, which means I had to make sure he didn’t see me.  I ducked back into the room and leapt back under the blankets.

        As I lie in wait for Holly to come in and start his routine again, I heard the sound of galloping hooves and barking.  That pony again.  I heard some playful growling and sniffing, followed by a whine.  “Don’t worry, I trust her,” I heard Holly say.  “Hey, can you bring my special blend of coffee and a blond for Twilight?”

        There he goes trying to suck up to me again.  The barking pony gave a bark of approval and I heard her skitter off once again.  Don’t tell me she works here?  Holly seemed to take his time before he opened my door, and his expression was kind of dark.  “Hello, Ms. Sparkle,” he gave a weak smile.  “I hope you enjoy your books.”  He paused and scuffed a hoof on the floor, still not looking at me.  “Um, I’m gonna have a friend bring us a little treat in few minuets.”

        “Oh, it’s you...” I replied, putting down the notebook full of ramblings that I was pretending to read.  “You really are as stubborn as Dr. Anderson says.”  It was a low blow, but somehow I didn’t care.  He was capable of them too.

        “Stubborn?”  Holly blinked.  “Well...I like to think of it as....persistence!”  He gave a cheesy smile.  “It’s not such a bad thing, though.”

        “Ignorance is bliss I suppose,” I sighed, slumping back into the pillows.  So warm and soft.  “I wish I shared your optimism.  But, why don’t you look at me?  Are you just going to give up and dump me onto another hapless pony?”

        Holly flinched and I knew I had him.  “No...Celestia no!  I’ve already told myself that much.  But...maybe you should tell me more about this darkness?”

        “Darkness.  Noun.  Can refer to absence of light, lack of illumination for seeing, or the shade of colors.  An absence of cheer or lack of rectitude ---”

        “You know what I mean, smarty flanks,” Holly waved a hoof.  No way he could be that dense, could he?  How is he not getting angry?  "Seriously, Ms. Sparkle.  Have you ever thought that maybe the darkness isn’t so much an ill omen, but rather nature trying to correct something?”

        “You sound like those MoonDreamer ponies from Daring Do.  In all honesty, I don’t see why you care.  You can’t stop it, and keeping me here isn’t going to either.”  I shook my head.  “I suggest you take this time to say your goodbyes.  Unless you want to let me out?”

        “Well if neither of us can stop it, then why waste perfectly good talk time?  Doesn’t make sense, I mean; with every light there will be a shadow,” his eyes lit up for a brief moment.  “What if I do want to keep you here?  Then what?  If this darkness can only be stopped by you, the heroine, then wouldn’t you want to do what it takes to get out of here?”

        “It’s not just me, but my friends too.  All six of us need to be together and in perfect harmony to accomplish anything.  But they’re the reason I’m here now and I hate them for it!”  I slammed my hooves on the bed.  “So even if you did let me go, there’s nothing I can do anyway...”  I began to cry.  It made me feel sick.  “It’s no surprise you’d want to keep me here though.  I saw you checking me out.”

        Holly cringed.  Seemed he was a stickler for a crying mare.  “Now now...crying won’t fix anything, Twilight.  Plus, I’m the only one who wants you to be better.  If you get down over your looks, then who’s to say that evil won’t prey on that weakness?”

        “They’re right.  You really are dense!”  I snapped.  “It’s not about a stallion ‘checking me out’, it’s the fact that I swore to never give up on my friends again, so they give up on me!  That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?  You know something don’t you?  I want to speak to Princess Celestia about this injustice!”  I felt a surge of confidence in my chest as I sat upright, locking eyes with him.  I played the trump card, now he’d have to cow to me.

        “The...the...Princess?”  Holly’s eyes widened in terror.  “Um...how does that work...exactly?”

        “Ponies are just like books if you know how to read,” I gave a coy smile.  “I don’t think Celestia is your type really.  But the question you just asked me makes me wonder if we’re on the wrong sides of this conversation.  Discord did say that those who stare into the void find it stares back.”

        “The void, huh?”  Holly tapped a hoof to his chin.  “I guess that could happen.  But when you live like me, running from Ursa Majors and spending hours on end stoned and hungry, you tend not to concern yourself with such things.”  He shrugged, as if this sudden reveal made him more qualified than ever to be probing me.  “Wait....Discord?”

        I pressed my hooves so hard into my eyes I could see colors.  “You know, you’re reeeeeealy not helping your credibility right now,”  I glare at him.  “First you tell me you’re not even an actual doctor, now you tell me you do drugs?  No wonder Dr. Anderson dumped me off on you!”

        “I never said I did drugs!”  Holly huffed playfully.  “Besides, I find drinking to be a lot healthier, though Berry Punch makes them way too strong...Speaking of drinks, where is that silly mare with our coffee?”

        “Oh, so you’re an alcoholic?”  I rolled my eyes.  “Maybe you should bring me some, I could use it!”  I slumped back into the bed.  “Sounds to me like you don’t want to help.”

        Holly gave a frustrated sigh.  “I suppose I’m not good at much other than idle chatter, but I’m trying!  Not to mention I am the  only pony standing between you and getting out of here.  Plus!  Even if I were to give you the go ahead, you would still be monitored until they believe you have fully recovered.”

        Well that was reassuring.  Given the problems I find myself in, I’d be a repeat offender.  That wouldn’t be beneficial at all.  “How do I know you weren’t already monitoring me?  Who are you really?  There’s no other explanation for why I would be put in here with no intervention from Princess Celestia!”  I paused and glanced over to see Discord holding up a sign for me to read.  “Discord says you’re working for the darkness.”

        Holly frowned.  “Really?  Twilight I am disappointed in you,” he shook his head.  “Imaginary friends...and of HIM no less!”

        “You said yourself to live without thinking about the void,” I shrugged.  “So am I right?”

        “Touche...”  Holly nodded.  “I see what you’re doing, but that’s not it.  The fact you’re taking advice from...DISCORD at all.  I’m a neutral party to all of this, and in all honesty, I could have you back in society with a flick of a hoof.  However, if you’re still intent on being Discord’s mouthpiece..."

        I felt a violent surge of anger at those words.  My body lashed forward on its own, my hoof stopping inches from his face.  “Discord’s better conversation than YOU!  AND he knows what’s going on!  I’ve...got a new friend now...”

        “Twilight, think!”  Holly rubbed his forehead with his hooves.  “If Discord knows what’s going on, who better to be suspicious of?!”  He gave a rough sigh and crossed his forelegs.  “I really expected more from you.”  I could feel myself shrinking, like the scared little filly under Celestia’s disappointed gaze.

        “That darkness touched me!  I felt it!  It was nothing like Discord it was...nothing in this world.  I felt dirty...cold...afraid...”  I shivered at the thoughts of being consumed by that venomous black ichor once again.  Seeping into my body, dissolving me from the inside out.

        “Calm down and really think about what’s important to you real quick.  The one thing in this world that is irreplaceable,” Holly began.  “You know...a dream...a special somepony.  Anything!  Remind yourself of who you are!”

        “I don’t have a special somepony,” I frowned.  “I fulfilled all of my dreams and most of Celestia’s.  And my friends, well you don’t see them or the Princesses here, do you?”  I cocked a brow, sarcasm evident once again.  “So i’ve got nothing to live for actually.”

        “So this whole mission you're dead set on, is because you’re trying to fill a void?  There’s nothing you want to protect, or see change?  Nothing to make a difference for all the fools that can’t see them anymore?”  Holly was starting to get philosophical on me, and I didn’t like it.  I could show him a thing or two.

        “Just because I said I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t have a conscience.  I’m an Element of Harmony, and I’m honor bound to defend Equestria from whatever evils may threaten it.  Even if I don’t really want to,” my voice trailed off as I stared at the wall in front of me.

Holly seemed ready to get up and leave when that barking pony from before came in balancing a tray on her

back.  Two steaming cups were perched upon it, and I eyed them carefully as the pony carrying them made frantic movements.  It was almost like watching Pinkie in action.  Finally, the mare removes the tray with her teeth and places it on the table.  I immediately grab mine in my hooves, taking a long sip to calm my nerves.  I then eyed the mare, being scratched behind the ear by Holly as her hind leg kicked.

        “First an alcoholic, then that musclehead...now her?  Talk about the inmates running the asylum,” I rolled my eyes and took another swig to hide my self satisfied smile.  The blue mare frowned, gave a snort as her nostrils flared, then turned and galloped out of the room.

        “She can understand us, you know,” Holly shook his head, a frown on his face once again.  “Honestly, Twilight...you’re starting to sound like Trixie!”

        I nearly choked on my next gulp.  What did he just say to me?!  No, he wants me to get angry so he can keep me here!  I won’t play his game!  “I try not to look into that void,”  I mused.  “Acting this way is kind of...liberating!  I can see why Trixie does it.”

        “It is nice to take breaks, isn’t it?”  Holly smiled, hoping that this time he could get somewhere.  “A break allows us to enjoy our accomplishments before we have to get back into the game.”

        “I once asked Princess Celestia how she copes with outliving all her subjects.  She told me that life isn’t measured by time, but accomplishments.  That ponies who make a difference will live forever in history,” I gave a sigh of defeat.  “I’ve done that...so many times...and now look at me...”

        “Be happy for that.  This is nothing.  One day you’ll look back on this and laugh,” Holly paused and smiled.  “well mostly at me.  But, for the time being, know that I am trying to help you out.  Okay?  Mom’s a little strict, but you got a better chance than some.  Don’t do anything TOO bold, okay?”

        “I suppose...”  I muttered, feeling my anger slowly breaking.  “So how does this work?  I get off for good behavior or something?  They’re not going to try and slip me pills in applesauce or lobotomize me with lasers are they?”

Holly shook his head and chuckled.  “No, nothing like that.  The first is too obvious and the second is too

messy.  Really, what will happen, is that you will be put in front of a board of ponies who ask questions based on what they deem ‘normal”.  You’re good to go if you answer right, so I suggest against letting Discord influence your mouth.”  He smiled, “Unless you want to see more of me.”

        “Am I petitioning for release or publishing a story?”  I sighed.  “You said yourself that ‘insane’ is such a subjective word.  Well, so it ‘normal’.  Who are they to judge anything?  What do YOU think?”  I snapped, putting the ball in his court now.

        “Sweetheart, I can’t rightfully answer what the board things.  But as far as what I think, you’re definitely trustworthy.”  He nodded and actually looked me in the eye for the first time since this started.  “I promise you this.  If you get rejected, I will personally see to it that you get out.  I can’t stand this place anyway, I prefer the E.R.”

        “Sweetheart, huh?  Ya know, Holly...I don’t have a special somepony.  And if I DO get out,” I paused.  What was I doing?  This isn’t me!

        Holly blushed.  “Oh, that.  I didn’t think you’d take my flattery seriously.”

        I felt a smile, a real smile, cross my own lips.  “You know, Holly.  when you’re not being an idiot, you’re kind of cute.”

        “An idiot?!”  He sighed, that smile disappearing.  “Well, I never thought I was that bad.”

        “Your heart’s in the right place, and that’s all anypony can ask.  And...despite all my sarcasm and everything...” I glanced to the floor, rubbing my arm with a hoof.  “Thank you for being a better friend than most...”

        “Sure thing,” Holly smiled.  “I guess all we do now is...wait.”

        “How long?”

        Holly shrugged.  “Well, I sent your paperwork in ahead of time, so...about two days.”

        ‘TWO DAYS?!”  I groan and fall into the bed, burying my face with the pillow to muffle my screams.  “Everything will be destroyed by then!”

        “How do you know?”  Holly asked, glancing at me suspiciously.

        I sat up and pulled the pillow off my face, giving him a dark stare.  “I’m a genius, remember?  The darkness takes the form of a storm cloud.  Before it touched me I saw how fast it was moving...and growing.  By my calculations, it will consume all of Equestria and parts of the neighboring kingdoms by tomorrow.”

        “I’m a sucker,” Holly groaned.  “Well, seems like you best be getting ready, though you better say goodbye to Ponyville.  because they’ll be looking for you while the one assigned to you was in the restroom.”  He gave a sly wink.

        “Wait....You’re gonna help me...escape?”  I felt a surge through me.  Something about that word made me feel more adventurous than in my short life.

        “No, I just have a real bad urge to go to the restroom, then possibly chat with a few guards while you slip out the back door.  Who knows?  You might run into a zebra named Zecora in the Everfree Forest.  After all, no sane pony would venture in there, right?”

        “If I wasn’t so confused about what I wanted, I could kiss you!”  I made a slight squeeing noise and blushed at the outburst.  I hurried to grab my things as I flung that accursed gown off my body.  Holly had did me the greatest favor in the world.

        And I was about to ditch him just like that.  Suddenly all the guilt I should’ve been feeling during my constant manipulation came welling up all at once.  Was this another trick?  A ploy to make me feel guilty and stay of my own accord?  Well played, Holly...

        “You don’t have the luxury of time,” Holly gestured to the door.  “GO!”  He shook his head and muttered to himself.  “Mares will be the death of me...”

        I made my way down the hall and towards the back door, Holly having walked out and keeping that muscle bound pony occupied.  The back door was in my grasp, and I could already feel the cool night air washing over me once again.  Licking my lips in anticipation, I threw myself at the door and stumbled outside.  The grass beneath my hooves a welcome feeling.

Fresh air.  I forgot what it felt like.  The night was cool and everything was basked in the warm glow of the

moon.  I looked up at the waxing orb, drinking in its wonder and beauty.  At one point in time, I had an odd infatuation with the princess of the night.  Don’t know if it was a forbidden power thing or what, but she always seemed on the level with me.  Not as aloof as Celestia.

        Yes the moon and stars were beautiful and...

        Wait...

        Moon and stars?  Where was the storm?  That...That thing....where....

        “Oh, no...”