The Refugees
(8) Doubts and Insecurities
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by neorenamon
Twilight awoke to find herself staring into the eyes of Big Macintosh. There just seemed to be enough light in the room to see the details about himself, and her. He was on top of her on Apple Bloom's sofa. She realized a few things immediately, such as the fact they were naked, he was pinning her hands at her wrists, and he wasn't smiling. His legs straddled hers, pinning her down.
"BIG MACINTOSH!" she cried, "What are you?!..."
"Don't go flatterin yerself," he said curtly, "Ya just ain't my kinda gal."
She looked down between his legs (past her own breasts) and could see he wasn't 'interested' in her. Not at all.
"Why don't you like me?!"
"Ya just don't got nothin I want, sugar," he growled, "In fact ya got bout everythin I don't want!"
"Why?!"
"Yer a stuck up Princess, a book worm, an if'n I wanted soft and curvy gals, there's plenty ah them I can get with a whole lot less trouble than you."
"BUT I LOVE YOU!" she wept.
"AN I'LL NEVER LUV YOU!" he yelled as he leaned into her face. His eyes seemed to almost glow red with his anger.
He easily moved her hands so he could grab and hold them both with just his one hand.
"DON'T HURT ME!"
"THEN LEAVE ME AN MAH SWEETIE PIE ALONE!"
He raised his other hand to strike her.
"NOOOOOO!!!" screamed Twilight. She turned her head as he started to swing down at her. But the blow never came. She looked back to see him frozen in place like a statue.
"We know this is a nightmare," said a nearby voice, "but still you're being far too hard on yourself. It was time to interfere."
She turned her head the other way to see Princess Luna standing next to the sofa.
While she was about as tall as Big Mac, she was surely not the same mass. Her midnight blue hide almost seemed to shimmer in the dim light. But it wasn't nearly as shimmering or flowing as her dark blue mane and tail. Her eyes of bright blue seemed to contrast with her black crown and her dark blue seven inch horn. She could see her well enough to spot the black irregular patches on her thighs with their white crescent moon cutie marks. But just like Celestia, she was exceptionally endowed even for her size. Perhaps even a little more motherly than Jifar. But her black nipples of modest size almost seemed invisible against her hide in the low light. To top it all off, large feathered wings sprouted from her shoulders.
"Wait," she said, "Why are YOU naked?!"
"Well, it's YOUR nightmare and WE cannot control every aspect of it, now can we?"
"So you're saying I might have a chance with Big Macintosh?" she asked as she looked back into his bright green eyes and all of his large sculpted muscles.
"You cannot know unless you try," replied the Princess of the Moon, "If you defeat yourself before you even start, then you can never prevail."
"I guess not."
"And you certainly cannot break Jifar's... large... heart... without giving him a chance, now can you?"
"I guess not," she sighed.
Big Mac seemed to vanish in a puff of smoke. She sat up to look at Luna.
"Besides, we believe there will be a knock at the door..."
At that second, the door got knocked in. She hardly seemed to know what was happening before she was being hugged by someone large, as the only thing she saw was a flash of giraffe breasts before she was being smothered.
"Oh goddess," she cried, "Thank goodness!"
"MMMPPPHHH!" she muttered into the mammoth breasts.
"What are we over here? Chopped onions?"
"While you are most beautiful and wise," she replied, "this goddess is more my size. While Opa's goddess you might be, this is the only goddess for me."
"Mmmppphhh!"
"Goddess, are we? We could get used to being called that... Oh, and stop panicking, Twilight. It's only a myth that you can die in a dream... although that looks like a heck of a way to go."
"Mmmmmmmmm..."
Twilight breathed more easily as Luna pried the overly affectionate giraffe off her.
"By the way, Big Macintosh is suffering from his own nightmares."
"Really?" asked Twilight.
"Yes, he fears that you could never really love someone who isn't as smart or regal as you. That you couldn't love somepony who works the land and gets his hands dirty for a living."
"But that's not true!" she protested.
"And yet you feel he cannot love you because you somehow do not meet his criteria for attraction. That he might be put off by the fact you're very smart, noble, and not sturdy as Jifar."
"But..."
"We also spoke to him through his dreams," said Luna, "and perhaps he can give you a chance. But one of you needs to break the ice. Part of his nightmare was breaking you because he was clumsy and he sees you as being fragile."
"I'm not that fragile, am I?"
"We are just giving you both something to think about. You should have time to speak to him on the way to Canterlot. He informed us of his intentions."
"I see. Will Celestia allow us to have a relationship?"
"We cannot speak for big sister in this matter. You shall have to ask her that yourself."
"Thank you... for everything..."
"It seems our work here is done for now. You should be waking up pretty soon. Try to keep the screaming down. You don't want to wake up Apple Bloom after all... But it seems we need to find out more about this Opa..." she said as she faded away like a flickering candle flame.
...
Twilight sat bolt upright as she gasp. She looked around to confirm she was still in Apple Blooms room. The Princess sighed as she saw the young teenage mare sleeping in her own bed. Glancing down, she noticed she was wearing the same clothes she had when she fell asleep, which was a good sign she had truly awakened. Then she noticed the sheet that she had just tossed to the end of the seat. Apple Bloom most likely placed it on her after she fell asleep.
"Good morning, Twilight," said Apple Bloom, "Are you alright?"
"I'm... fine... really..."
"Well you sat up like ya had a nightmare or something."
"I hope I didn't wake you..."
"No," she replied, "I was getting up anyways."
"Thanks for covering me last night."
"Sure, no problem." She slipped out of bed wearing her full yellow pajamas. "Well, time to get dressed to greet the day."
"Hey, I'll just get out of the way," said Twilight quickly.
"Okay, I'm sure someone is already fixing breakfast."
She nodded as she got up and went to the door.
"Big brother is probably getting ready to go on his trip."
"I'll make sure he doesn't get in any trouble," said Twilight as she opened the door.
"I'm sure he'll do the same for you," replied Apple Bloom as the violet alicorn closed the door.
She heard something as she walked by Big Macintosh's door.
"Is my love doing alright?" asked Jifar, "Did you have a nightmare fright?"
"It ain't nuthin, sweetums," he replied, though he didn't sound all to convincing to Twilight, "Don't ya worry yer pretty little head bout it or anythin."
'She does seem to make him more... verbose,' thought Twilight.
"Is it the goddess that concerns you so?" she asked as Twilight heard movement on a bed, "To Canterlot do you still wish to go?"
"Yeah," he replied as his voice lowered, "Even if Celestia blesses the wedding and lets Twilight live with us an all, what reason does she have ta live with me? What if somepony better comes along?"
Twilight reached for the door knob.
"In the goddess I do believe," she replied, "I do not think she'd ever leave."
"I'll help ya pack, sugar-cube."
"I must speak of my goddess dream," said Jifar happily, "surely my smile shall beam. I saw her with the Goddess of Dreams and the Moon. But only my goddess can make me swoon."
"Y'all can tell me all about it on the road, sugar."
She stopped reaching. 'I can't bother them... now,' she thought as she walked away.
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